UPPER VALLEY HOCKEY LEAGUE

ODDS:	Nords by 1 goal
OVER/UNDER:	9 goals

A troubled and offensively challenged Dead River team sits in last place having lost 5 in a row. Last week was one of their better games against a tough Brewers club, as they ran into a hot goaltender in Pete "The Meat" Bartline. They were in this one until late into the 3rd period keeping the game at 3-2, but a late goal by the Brew Crew & an empty netter ended it.

The Nordiques have also been offensively challenged as of late, and a light bench last week hurt in a 3-2 shootout loss to the top rated Gamblers. The Nordiques were without veterans Ian "The Grin" Coates(A) & Roger "The Dentist Drill" Phillips, as well as stud netminder Johnny "Temper Tantrum" Turner. It was a solid game, and they were able to keep a Willy Meyer-less Gambler's team to 2 goals, but they also ran into a hot goaltender in Greg Feiden.

This is a tough one to call, as both teams have had a dormant offense just waiting to explode like a big whitehead zit on a fat chick's ass. All 3 games between these two teams this season have been relatively high scoring, with the Nordiques winning all 3 including an 8-7 shootout barn-burner in week 3.

Nordiques by 1 goal...5-4.

Nordiques take advantage of a short-benched Dead River Team: 7-3

Two teams with offensive struggles faced off in the first game tonight. A struggling Dead River squad sits in last place having lost 5 straight games while only scoring an average of 2.8 goals per game. The Nordiques on the other hand have only averaged 2.5 goals per game in their last 4 games, all being losses except a solid 3-2 shootout loss to the Gambler's last week. The Dead River Rats have been plagued by an inconsistent roster, short bench & excessive penalties. Tonight was no different, as DR showed up with 5 skaters, and later grabbed 2 stragglers from other teams. They put up a good fight, dragging out the inevitable, carrying a 2-2 tie deep into the second period before the Nordiques deep bench & fresh legs prevailed in a 7-3 win.

The Nordiques were powered by winger Roger "The Rusty Dentist Drill" Phillips who contributed 2 goals, center Ian "The Grin" Coates who added a goal & 2 assists & defensemen Kelly "The Gimp" Park who was hobbled by a back injury and went from being really slow to a new low in speed that can only be compared to that of a sloth, wrapped in duct tape, with an elephant stapled to it's back and stuck in molasses. The Nordiques jumped out to a 2-0 lead with a goal in the first from Jimmy "Nancy" Kerrigan and Phillip's first goal of the night at 8:36 of the 2nd period. Phillips was flying tonight and seemed to be drawing energy from his new hair style that can only be described as a silver jerry-curl, and is something to behold. The 2-0 lead didn't hold up as the Nordiques played some sloppy puck, making too many mistakes as they thought they could walk all over the short-benched Dead River squad. The game took a turn when the Gambler's Matty "The Milkman" Marrazzo climbed over the boards for Dead River and immediately had a positive impact, revitalizing the River Rats & chipping in a goal and assist in the 2nd period.

Marrazzo set up Brian Racicot at 5:14 and then skated around Park, like he wasn't even moving, cut across the top of the crease and ROOFED a backhander over the Nordique's Johnny "Broken Clocks" Turner who just like his personal life, couldn't time this one properly. It was a sick goal, tying the game at 2 apiece and finally lighting a fire under the collective asses of the Nordiques. In net at the other end was Greg "NAMBLA" Hadley, who 's night was about to become a lot less fun. "Super" Jordy McGee made a great personal play after taking a pass at center ice from Park, and busted into Dead River's end, cutting behind the net while sucking every single DR player with him and fed Greg "The Butcher of Guelph" Marsh all alone in front for the goal. Hadley didn't even have a chance, and all he could do is lunge at Marshy with a weak forearm shiver that he learned from Turner last season.

The start of the 3rd period was all Nordiques, but Dead River capitalized on a bad turnover at the point when the Nordique's Tao "Turnover" Smith forgot that he had absolutely no hockey sense and left a lame duck drop pass for his point man that was tipped past him sending a trio of River Rats in all alone on Turner. The puck was pushed up to Ricky Golden "Showers" who beat Turner on a breakaway with a quick move to his forehand and tucking the puck past his outstretched leg. The Nordiques battled right back with Phillip's second goal of the game on a beautiful tic-tac-toe pass that went from Shawn "McDiscipline" McDermott down to Kevin "Washer &" Dwyer at the near post then to the back door to Phillips for the goal. Poli "The Nightmare" Nightengale made it 5-3 right off the faceoff on a feed from Park & Coates on the far boards. The Nightmare turned from the boards and fired a wrister between the legs of his winger "The Turner" Smith just over the pad and inside the post on a bewildered Hadley. Park made it 6-3 just 34 seconds later taking a pass on the far boards, cutting through the neutral zone at that ridiculously slow speed, lulling the entire Dead River team to sleep before splitting the defense and beating Hadley on a breakaway with a quick flutter puck over the blocker. Ian Coates finished off the scoring on the night on a nice feed from Marsh with 3:41, but the 7-3 score didn't stop the Nordiques from continuing to work hard and taking offensive chances, much to the chagrin of Hadley who got worked up over a semi-breakaway by Dwyer with a minute to go. Hadley was more or less just steeping in self hatred and loathing, but was projecting his hatred for himself upon his opponents.

Nordiques win one that they SHOULD have won, but it took almost 25 minutes for them to realize they were the better team.

 

Team:	Time:	Type:	Player:	Details:
1st PERIOD
NDQ	10:41	Goal	Kerrigan, James(2)	Assist(s): Dakai, Tom(4)
LAB	10:09	Penalty	Golden, Richard(5)	2 minutes for Hooking
2nd PERIOD
NDQ	08:36	Goal	Phillips, Roger(5)	Assist(s): Kerrigan, James(2) Dwyer, Kevin(4)
LAB	06:52	Goal	Racicot, Brian(4)	Assist(s): Marrazzo, Matt(26)
LAB	05:14	Goal	Marrazzo, Matt(26)	Assist(s): White, Marty(1)
NDQ	02:03	Goal	Marsh, Greg(8)	Assist(s): McGee, Jordan(18) Park, Kelly(13)
3rd PERIOD
LAB	09:24	Goal	Golden, Richard(4)	Assist(s): Zanleoni, Jay(12) Racicot, Brian(5)
NDQ	08:47	Goal	Phillips, Roger(6)	Assist(s): Dwyer, Kevin(5) McDermott, Shawn(8)
NDQ	05:49	Goal	Nightingale, Poli(2)	Assist(s): Park, Kelly(14) Coates, Ian(7)
NDQ	05:15	Goal	Park, Kelly(4)	Assist(s): Coates, Ian(8) McDermott, Shawn(9)
NDQ	03:41	Goal	Coates, Ian(6)	Assist(s): Marsh, Greg(12)

LOG IN:
Username:		You must be logged into your Forum account to leave game comments. Please log in to the right to add your Brilliant Diatribes & Thunderous Verbal Attacks about this game.
Password:
	forget username / password? create account

Game Comments:
The Dark Canuck Fairlee, VT Registered: Dec 2004 Posts: 340	HAAAAADLEYYYYYYYYYYY Feb 12th, 2010 04:03 PM Can't wait to smoke one by you Hads...just to let you have it!!! Bring a silver sharpie, I'll sign it for ya!
Nords Fan Killington, VT Registered: Posts: 1	Please Pass the Pepper Feb 14th, 2010 10:09 AM On the heels of their best game all season, the Nords will certainly light up Hadley all night. Let the peppering begin.
hkydoc WRJ, VT Registered: Jan 2004 Posts: 517	Pad your stats night Feb 16th, 2010 05:10 PM Its official! McD
hkydoc WRJ, VT Registered: Jan 2004 Posts: 517	HA! Feb 21st, 2010 12:45 PM "Broken Clocks" Turner...couldn't time it right just like in his personal life... HA! Funny, funny shit, Park! If JT had implanted solar powered clocks in both of his wrists he'd still be 10 minutes late! Great write-up! McD