Welcome Back to the UVHL: Somehow, We’re Doing This Again
Against the advice of doctors, spouses, knees, hips and basic common sense, the Upper Valley Hockey League is back for another season.
The 2026–27 UVHL season officially gets underway October 21, which means it's time to dig the hockey bag out of the garage, determine whether that smell is permanent, and convince yourself that the three beers you had Saturday won't affect your cardio on Tuesday.
They will.
But we're back.
Opening Night — October 21
The season opens with a pair of games:
7:55 PM — Whalers @ Mustangs
9:20 PM — Gamblers @ Tuck
The full season schedule has been posted, so you can now begin the annual tradition of checking it against vacations, work trips, kids' schedules and whatever other responsibilities you're prepared to abandon for beer-league hockey.
A Few Things Before We Begin
For the returning UVHL veterans, most of this should be familiar. Unfortunately, experience has taught us that "you've been told this before" and "you will remember it" are two very different things.
Waivers: Every player needs a waiver on file before playing. You can complete yours through your MyUVHL account. Remember that the digital waiver isn't finished until you click the confirmation link sent to your email.
New Players: Only new players need to register. If you've played in the UVHL before, congratulations: we still have your information. There is no escaping the database.
Jersey Numbers: Every player needs a number, and there are no duplicate numbers. Try to wear the same number all season so the scorekeeper has at least a fighting chance of determining which middle-aged superstar deserves credit for that secondary assist.
Referees: We're always looking for more officials, particularly current players willing to jump over to the dark side. Refs earn $65 per game, plus the invaluable experience of discovering just how annoying all of you actually are.
Don't Be an Asshole
This remains perhaps the most important UVHL rule.
We're competitive. We want good hockey. We expect guys to play hard.
But everyone has to wake up the next morning and go to work, take care of kids, shovel a driveway, or quietly wonder why their lower back suddenly hurts when they sneeze.
The three-penalty rule remains in effect. Pick up your third penalty and your evening is over.
Abuse an official badly enough to get tossed and you'll miss your next game — and you'll need to ref a UVHL game yourself before returning.
Yes, we weaponized empathy.
The Agitator Rule also remains in effect. Officials and the scorekeeper can remove someone who is making the game miserable even if their behavior doesn't fit neatly into one particular penalty.
In simpler terms: don't be that guy.
And With That... Welcome Back
The schedule is posted. The ice is waiting. Everyone's undefeated. Everyone thinks their team got better. And at least three guys have spent the summer telling people they're "in the best shape they've been in for years."
We'll find out October 21.
Here's to another season of great hockey, terrible line changes, phantom assists, unnecessary chirping, completely justified complaints about officiating that definitely weren't penalties, and friendships built around a shared refusal to accept that we're getting older.
Welcome back to the UVHL.
Same idiots. New season. Let's play hockey.