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UPPER VALLEY HOCKEY LEAGUE


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Response:

What is your opinion of the UVHL so far?

BY: kpark
Jan 7th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Hello all, I am just trying to get a feel for what you all think of the UVHL and UVHL.com. Let me know if there is any things you'd like to see or if there is any updates you'd like done. Thanks
Response:

Testing out the Forum....

BY: kpark
Jan 7th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Hey Guys, I am just testing out the Forum to see if I can get it to work. Email me, Kelly the Webmaster, at kpark@parkcreative if you have any ideas about how you would like this to work or if you wanted any other things done on the website.
Response:

Great Start.

BY: theScorer
Jan 8th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Hey Guys, I just wanted to say that I love the league so far. I am so glad that there is a good league in the local area. Thanks again and keep up the good work.
Response:

Who can make it to the Thursday Night Skates?

BY: kpark
Jan 11th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


We are hoping to get a 2 hour slot at the rink on Thurday Nights, but we don't want to shell out $270 and only have 7 guys show up. Please Reply Back if you can make it or if you can't, or if you can make it occasionally. If you would rather have the skate on another night, please specify which would be best for you. Thanks, Kelly
Response:

I Love it so far

BY: Mr. Hockey
Jan 11th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


I must say you have done a great job so far. Very organized and a good fun time. I would like to see more teams in the future, between 6 and 8 would be perfect. Thanks for the good times
Response:

Blah Blah Blah I can't

BY: kpark
Jan 12th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Hkljew ajf iwojfsaiojfoisajf iaosjf s
Response:

Just seeing if this is going to work.

BY: kpark
Jan 12th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Just another test. Blah Blah Blah. Boo Hoo Hoo.
Response:

McDermott Smells like poo

BY: kpark
Jan 30th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Hey McDermott, you punk. Trashing me on the website that I built for your dumpy ass. I've only doctored the game sheets to add 5-10 of my 16 points, but THAT'S IT!!!!!! I earned those other 6 points fair and square. Ha. Anyways, are you digging this Forum or what? It still needs alittle bit of work, but I am getting there. Let me know if there's anything else you wanna see on it.
Response:

UVHL opinion

BY: hkydoc
Jan 30th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


I think that Kelly Park should sell his equipment because he is just so pretty and should take up ballet instead of hockey. I think he is doctoring the game sheets so it appears that he is in the scoring UVHL lead since he picks them up from one of the commissioners after the games...Actually, Kelly, you have created a fucking kickass website for us klunks, and it is greatly appreciated! The Commish (the fat, slow, pylon on defense Commish)
Response:

LOVED IT!!!!

BY: kpark
Feb 2nd, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Hey HockeyDoc, I'm down, any idea where we can pick up a couple of Janet's Nipple clamps? It wasn't a tassle, it was a brass star that was held in place by the bar that went through her nipple. I'll split it with you, you and your wife can have it during the week and my wife and I on the weekends.
Response:

Janet's boobie

BY: hkydoc
Feb 2nd, 2004 @ 12:00AM


I liked the tassle she had on it...I want one for my wife.
Response:

Janet Jackson's Boob

BY: theScorer
Feb 2nd, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Hey everyone, I just thought that you might wanna see Janet Jackson's Boob from the Super Bowl Half Time Show. Check it out here http://drudgereport.com/mattjj.htm By the WAY, how about them PATRIOTS. Let me know what you think about her boobie. I'm a big fan.
Response:

Mud League - UVHL team

BY: hkydoc
Feb 14th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


The Mud League will start on March 7th (approximately) according to Dick Dodds. Rosters are filing up, and this year there will be 2 divisions: Over 35, and Under 35. Players over 35 can play in the under 35 division, but not the other way around. Goalies can play in either. Dick has informed me that he has room for 4 teams in each division. Projections are that Vt Law, Potter, 1 UVHL, and one other (mystery?) team, possibly Stateline looking to repoeat, will make up the under 35 division. The over 35 division is an unknown, but I am told that CCM will be involved, the majority of the past Cardigan squad, and who knows what else.

I am lookng for UVHL players first to fill out the remainder of the roster before I go looking for players who did not play in our league. I have 5 for sure, and want 10 more - and ONLY guys who CAN commit for the WHOLE season. No vacations, no work conflicts, no bullshit. The competition is like playing against the Red team, so be ready. I do not want a bunch of unreliable high school or prep school kids and college players stuck on my roster like a few years ago - basically I want to tell Dick my roster is full and not to bother adding guys I don't know or want.

So who can play?

Shawn McDermott
H: (802) 295-2022
W: (802) 280-2225
drsjmcd@valley.net
Response:

Montreal Tournament April 30 - May 2, 2004

BY: hkydoc
Feb 14th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


HOCKEY TOURNAMENT!

Shawn McDermott (me) has entered a team in the Russel Hockey Tournament in Pierrefonds, PQ at the beautiful 4 Rinks in the northwest end of Montreal this spring. I am looking for 9 more players to complete the roster of 12. I have attended this tournament 4 times, and I have never been disappointed. I would prefer a roster of only UVHL players, except for my buddy from Florida who is coming(finally, you Klunk!). These weekend tourneys are great for both individual players and couples looking for a weekend away. You can stay downtown, or out near the rink. Busses take you to the rink, and you can leave your equipment there. The people at Russel Hockey are a class act, and I have never entered in a team that was put in the wrong division - always close, competitive, within 1-2 goals. We get 3 games guaranteed, and a fourth if we make the finals.

Cost is as follows (it depends on your room arrangements):

Double $260 US/player, $175 US/guest (i.e. wife, etc.)
Triple $250 US/player, $165 US/guest
Quad $230 US/player, $155 US/guest

Downtown Montreal accomodations cost $35.00 extra per person. I recommend this, as cab fare to the Casino, titty bars, Peel Pub, or other downtown attractions adds up to more than that. Downtown rooms go fast, so if you want this option, let me know ASAFP.

There are lots of inlusions in the price, too many to list here, but highlights are: beer/drink after every game, 2 meals at the rink, beer bash and roast beef dinner Sat night, lounge overlooking 4 rinks, bar, pro shop, drink specials, videotaped games, and more.

I do not yet have a price quote for "hockey only" - meaning hotel, tournament perks, etc. are on your own, but I do have some quys who want to stay with friends in the city instead of the hotels. I'll let you know soon about the cost for hockey only.

We are just going up for fun, no aspirations to win or play Sunday morning in the Finals (who wants to do that anyway?), probably B or C division, and definitely not A division. We will use the UVHL jerseys, so don't worry about that.

FIRST PAID, FIRST PLAYED, EH! So show me the money if you want to have a great hockey weekend in Montreal! I have brochures if you want more info, and would like your commitment no later than 3/15/04.

Shawn McDermott
H: (802) 295-2022
W: (802) 280-2225
drsjmcd@valley.net
Response:

Count Me In!!!

BY: kpark
Feb 15th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Hey Shawn, I'm in. Well for the under 35 league. Sorry I'm not old enough to play in the over 50 league with you and some of the other guys. Ha. Let me know. Kelly
Response:

Mud League

BY: hkydoc
Feb 16th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Kelly:
Don't worry there won't be any shootouts in the under 35 division.

Response:

Any interest in a Summer League?

BY: kpark
Feb 17th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Hey guys, after the game at Bentley's we were having a few beers, some more than others...(Home School)...and we discussed getting together a league over the summer, possibly at Thompson. Would anyone be interested in playing, putting in a team, etc.
Response:

HA, I SCORED

BY: kpark
Feb 17th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Very funny Mr. McDermott. I scored on a penalty shot last night. WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THAT!!!!!!

Response:

Summer league

BY: Tdake
Feb 19th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


I would be interested in a summer league or even if there was enough guys just to get together and play once a week even if there was not any organized league
Response:

Montreal

BY: hocdoc23
Feb 19th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Guys, Im Rob, Shawns chiropractic buddy (Im sure you've heard some stories) otherwise ask him. Anyway Im flying up there from Florida so you better make this tourney. Shawn and I are good players (we all think we're better than we are). However; if it's just the 2 of us, that task is very tough to handle. We will have a great time too (win or lose) gambling too! Anyway CMON it's ok commit just like your wife made you. By the way is Shawn still as good as he says? Look forward to meeting some of you guys.

Regards,

Rob
Response:

BY: acsriver
Feb 19th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


yes count me in
Response:

BY: Vigs
Feb 20th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Sure
Response:

Summer League

BY: KenL
Feb 22nd, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Always looking for good summer hockey! Count me in.
Response:

BY: Sinbin
Feb 24th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


I would definately play...
Response:

BY: grpappas
Feb 26th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


sign me up
Response:

BY: hocdoc23
Feb 28th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Guys!!!! Don't let Shawn be the comish. I played fantasy hockey with him for years and never won. He cheats, steals, and lies. Guarantee he wins this too. He is captain KLUNK. King of the Klunkers, originated in his days in ST Louis.
Response:

Summer

BY: hocdoc23
Feb 28th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Can you travel to Florida too? I'll put a team in
Response:

Montreal

BY: hocdoc23
Feb 28th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Shawn, your play must have scared them off, lookslike its you and me. Thank God I can skate a whole game without a break, but then again I only play 2/3 of the ice. My own blueline won't let me in. CMON GUYS LETS GO, the money is cheap there isn't it and Im coming across the freakin country to see his slow fat ugly white ass too.

Rob
Response:

summer league

BY:
Mar 2nd, 2004 @ 12:00AM


for sure
Response:

Size 9 Easton z-air comp se

BY:
Mar 19th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Anybody want a pair of Easton Skates? My brother got them for me but they're too big and I need to unload them. Brand new, in the box. These are pro-stock, can't get them in stores and I'll let them go on the relatively cheap.
Response:

Yeah, that is cool.

BY: Mr. Hockey
Aug 21st, 2004 @ 12:00AM


I definitely like the knew team names. A vast improvement from last years names. Although if you are going to go with the original six team....you can't leave out the Rangers....I know they suck and all, but the Flyers are not an original six team. For that matter, Chicago sucks too, so why not replace them with the Mighty Ducks!!!!! That's my two cents.
Response:

What do you think of the new UVHL team names?

BY: kpark
Aug 21st, 2004 @ 12:00AM


The UVHL is planning on doing 6 teams this year, the UVHL Bruins, UVHL Flyers, UVHL Red Wings UVHL Blackhawks, UVHL Maple Leafs & UVHL Canadiens. The teams are based on the original 6, with the Flyers Replacing the Rangers. I for one love the idea. What are your thoughts?
Response:

COOOOOL

BY: kpark
Aug 23rd, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Sounds Good. That will be a blast. Keep up the good work. Kelly
Response:

TRAVELLING TEAM?

BY: jt
Aug 23rd, 2004 @ 12:00AM


We are starting a travelling team this year. We will play several Jr. Teams, Dartmouth and Yale Club teams and maybe Tuck. What do you think?
Response:

Definitely!!!!

BY: kpark
Oct 18th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


I know that there are 2 or 3 teams that are still looking to fill out their rosters. Click the contact us button on the left and send us an email or show up on Tuesday night before the first game to talk to one of the Commishes, Shawn "The Killer" McDermott or John "Captain Sieve" Turner.
Response:

Any open spots on a team?

BY: andrew
Oct 18th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


I just found out about the league and would love to find a competitive group to play with. I typically play LW but have played quite a bit of defense too. i would appreciate a call or e-mail from anyone with info. I hope I'm not too late. Thanks-
Andrew
Response:

Former Sniper

BY: twistedsteel
Oct 29th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Kelly if you'd stop spitting up all the shit like a baby and started concentrating on your game maybe you'd have more than 1 GOAL, looking forward to our game maybe the old park will show up and at least get a couple of shots off........... 4-0 PAL
Response:

VALID POINT

BY: Mr. Hockey
Oct 29th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


I actually think he is pretty good, but I would certainly like to see him without Ryan Sinclair on his team.
Response:

Hadley is a JOKE!!!!

BY: kpark
Oct 29th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Oh, by the way, Hadley is a SHITTY GOALIE and if it weren't for Ryan Sinclair scoring 8 goals a game, he'd be 0-4. I just wanted to state that for the record. He's 235 lbs. of twisted sludge with a 1 inch fuse!!!!! I'm going to LIGHT YOU UP next time we play Hadley, YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT.
Response:

How can you NOT vote for the guy with 7 goals!?!?!?!

BY: kpark
Nov 2nd, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Seriously, how can you NOT vote for the guy who single handedly beat a team by outscoring the other team 7-5 all by himself? Tuck, I know he is your buddy and all, and that he plays on your team, but SERIOUSLY, Sinclair had 7 freakin' goals. Vote with your brains and not your heart! I am referring to the games that took place on October 26th, where Ryan Sinclair had 7 goals in a 10-5 win over the Maple Leafs and John Tatum had 3 goals & 1 assist in an 8-4 win over the Blackhawks. I am not trying to downplay a great game by Tatum, but SERIOUSLY!!! Please respond back and tell me I am an idiot and why if you think otherwise!!!!!!
Response:

Hadley, I WILL DESTROY YOU!!!

BY: kpark
Nov 2nd, 2004 @ 12:00AM


First of all, I like the username, TWISTEDSTEEL! Second of all, I do suck and I reached my career pinnacle last year. Thirdly, I will still light you up tonight! You are going down punk! DOWN! All I need to do is make one move which will make you trip over one of your fat rolls and then put it upstairs!!! You're looking more and more like 275 lbs. of twisted shit!!!! See you tonight bud!
Response:

Player of the week

BY: slither
Nov 11th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


By the way how could not mention the bruins Tuck game last week anywhere? It's the only good hockey game played all season in this league ,,,,, they both deserve teams of the week...... screw player of the week
Response:

Kelly Park

BY: slither
Nov 11th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Just wanted to let you know YOU SUCK ASS!!!!
Response:

Hadley FINALLY LOST!!!!

BY: kpark
Nov 11th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Wow, Hads, I wish I could have been there for the ending to watch you loose! At least I won't hear a 6 and 0 chant from you this week! And prepare to lose again next week, this "FORMER SNIPER" is gonna light you up punk!
Response:

Please Vote so Tuck doesn't win every week.

BY: Mr. Hockey
Nov 11th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Wow, have you noticed a TREND HERE? Tuck wins the P.O.W. voting every week because they can't be objective and vote for someone other than their own team mate each week. We need other guys to vote to balance out their lack of originality! On the other hand, at least their showing support and voting!!!!! Thanks, Mr. Hockey
Response:

DAMN RIGHT!!!

BY: kpark
Nov 12th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Yeah, I heard it was a hell of a game. If only hadley could have saved 4 of those 6 shots he faced! Get on McDermott for the game writeups!!!! Or Turner. I am not responsible for those, I am only responsible for padding my stats!!!!!!
Response:

Thanks, I know!

BY: kpark
Nov 12th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Thanks for that compliment, Slither. You are too sweet! I pride myself on consistently sucking ass. It's what I'm good at and at least I'm consistent!!!! Oh and Hadley likes to be Tea Bagged from Pelletier!!!!!
Response:

Who is this SLITHER!?!?!?!?

BY: kpark
Nov 17th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Slither, come out and show your face? Who the hell are you? If you are going to trash me in a public forum, which I loved, I at least deserve to know who is trashing me so that I can return the favor in a less than delicate way! Sincerely, Kelly Andrew Park

P.S. We lit up Hadley's LAME ass last night 5-2 and I SCORED ON HIM. Hadley sucks dick for Beer money!
Response:

Drive by Shootout?

BY: jt
Nov 24th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


I heard a rumor of a drive-by in the shootout last night. What happened Tao? Help me understand.
Response:

Yeah, it was EMBARASSING!!!!

BY: kpark
Nov 26th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Tao, Tao, Tao........that was one of the more embarassing things I have seen, I feel for you and award you the first L.V.P.(Least Valuable Player) Award of the year. Yeahhhh!!!!
Response:

BY: varian72
Nov 30th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


No comment from this teammate other than to say there is now way I'm getting shafted at tonight's shootout.
Response:

bring the A game fellas

BY: shutout
Dec 6th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


6:40 game bring the A game
Response:

one way park

BY: shutout
Dec 6th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


look out for tomorrow night pal I'm making my first game of the year
Response:

Nice to have you back Norto!!!!!

BY: kpark
Dec 8th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Glad you could make it. Too bad you have Hadley as your goalie.
Response:

Bruins SUCK!!!!

BY: kpark
Dec 8th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


By the way, if you haven't heard, the MIGHTY BRUINS FELL AGAIN to the Rangers! And the Bruins Stacked their team by bringing in ex-NHLer Jeff Norton. Oh, additionally, Hadley sucks ass as I scored 4 goals on him!!!!!! They brought in Norto, who had 4 points and they still couldn't win! Here comes the fall of the Bruins, I LOVE IT. Oh and Hads, you suck!
Response:

I made Hadley look STUPID!!!

BY: kpark
Dec 9th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


By the way. If any of you missed the Rangers - Bruins game on Tuesday December 7th, I made Hadley look stupid. Don't listen to what CAPTAIN 5-Hole has to say as he will call my goals garbage goals. Hadley couldn't stop a shit from falling out of his obese ass!!!!! He even brought ex-NHLer Jeff Norton along for the ride only to let him down with some sloppy goaltending!!!!!!!
Response:

My first nomination is Greg Marsh.

BY: kpark
Dec 16th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Marshy, I am sad that I have to write your name down for this nomination, but the fact that you shot the puck at the refs head after he made a questionable call in a 2-1 game has forced me to vote for you. We could have used you in the last couple minutes of play being down 3-2. So my vote goes to Greg Marsh. The runner-up vote goes to Ben Robbins for getting turned like a hoop around a barrel and screen the goaltender multiple times. Sincerly, Kelly Andrew Park.
Response:

Who Should be LVP for 12/14?

BY: kpark
Dec 16th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Well we are starting a new, fun, weekly tradition called the L.V.P. or Least Valuable Player award for each week. So put up your nominations for last week, 12/14.
Response:

Kelly Park for LVP

BY: Tao Smith
Dec 17th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Come on, Kelly! I mean, give the guy a break. Sure, Marshy was wrong, but this is now his darkest hour. He needs the support of his teammates, more than ever. I mean, he slaps the puck at the ref, gets tossed out, loses the game for the team, and gets suspended for the next game, giving you the opportunity to pull even further away in the standings. How much more does one guy have to take, without having to hear it from a loud-mouthed, trash-talker like you? Did Sahq trash talk Kobe during the trial? Did Pedro trash talk Schilling when he went to the Mets? Did Cheny trash talk Kerry during the campaign? Hey, we're all one team, one league, one nation - why can't we all just get along?

P.S. Marshy, Kelly's right, you were the LVP. no offense, buddy.
Response:

BY: acsriver
Dec 18th, 2004 @ 12:00AM



Response:

Trade

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 23rd, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Huge trade eh? I can take the heat from my former teammates, and watch out Park, I'll be climbing up the scoresheet soon enough. Tao, no hard feelings, but the Hawks are about to pull past the Rangers. I ve got some catching up to do, So you'd better warm JT up real well! I'm gonna let the Howitzers fly, no more fuckin' around!
Response:

HADLEY SUCK BALLS!!!

BY: HOCKEYDOG
Dec 23rd, 2004 @ 12:00AM


HEY HADLEY I HEARD YOU HAVE BEEN PLAYING LIKE SHIT THIS YEAR, DONT MAKE ME COME UP THERE WITH SOME D-1 BOYS AND MAKE YOU LOOK SILLY.
Response:

Dead weight

BY: kpark
Dec 27th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Well Mr. Marsh, The Rangers, as a team, feel that we have gotten rid of the dead weight that was dragging us under. Our defense is now stronger and tighter and our offense is blindingly fast!!!!! We will destroy the Blackhawks and put the final nail in their coffin. Especially with Chris Johnson running that ship........Just kidding. I do like the new Blackhawks and wish you the best of luck in all games except against the Rangers. And I hope Marshy doesn't score any points in that run! Down with the Bruins.
Response:

Agreed

BY: kpark
Dec 29th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


First and foremost you need to get rid of Chris Johnson....DEAD WEIGHT.......then you follow by making McDermott cry, blow up Marshy's car and kick Fred in the shins and you have got a team! That's just my proposal.....I've also got a GREAT one for the NHL's little problem right now. I will finish up that proposal some time next week but it starts like this....."To the NHL.......stop being little bitches, you are killing the game...." That's all I got right now, but I've got some GREAT ideas. Talk to you soon.
Response:

My take on the big trade

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 29th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


First of all, I would like to take this opportunity to voice my opinion on the recent trade. I realize I've only played one game with the Blackhawks, and There are some talented players on this team(you know who you are), This team needs to shed some dead weight badly, and although I'm a new member of the team, I don't intend on losing every week. Hopefully commissioner McDermott will address this issue if it continues. The Blackhawks have more than enough players already, and maybe the time is now to re-tool the hurtin' Blackhawks.
Response:

BY: strike
Dec 30th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


kelly Park no goals on me at all
Response:

Uniforms

BY: snapper
Dec 30th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


I just wanted to throw out a ata boy for the briuns uniforms. Must be nice when one of you so called teamates doned the blk and gld ah?
Response:

BY: PIA
Dec 30th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


I will agree with rob who doesn't cp,plain as much as hadley does the refs are a bunch of primadonna's
Response:

trades

BY: PIA
Dec 30th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


fellas if everyone is so into the winning in this league you call a league up here. then get off your asses and find some players. It's pretty simple.
Response:

Drama

BY: Tao Smith
Dec 30th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Well said! I agree with Chris. Let's just play hockey and quit complaining about the refs (Pelletier), our teammates (Kelly), the rosters...it'll all work out. Let's just play some hockey. What do you say, guys?
Response:

Drama

BY: chrisj
Dec 30th, 2004 @ 12:00AM


First of all we are losing 4 players after next week, if you consider these players to be dead weight then fine if not then we lose. Once we learn to play ice hockey instead of pond hockey we will become better it doesn't matter who joins our team.Our defence has gotten better,but we need to clean up the rebounds and limit the amount of shots on net,it isn't brain surgery we all know whats wrong with our team and the better players will have to step up and carry the load for the weaker ones (you know who you are) In summation lets focus more on playing the game instead of creating a bunch of useless drama. Okay Kelly you can give us your feedback now!! How could we live without it.
Response:

Trade

BY: Tao Smith
Dec 31st, 2004 @ 12:00AM


Marshy, you got passed last week. Both Kelly and I are in front of you. I've rewritten the warning on my rear-view-mirror to read, "Warning, objects in your rear-view-mirror are not as close as they apprear." Good luck, my friend, we really do miss you on the Rangers. And, now that you are gone, Kelly and I are going to nominate a new LVP - Tom Daki for missing the last game to go on a DATE! Tom, it's your fault we blew a three-goal lead in the third against the Bruins. Way to go, pal.
Response:

Nice Unnies!

BY: kpark
Jan 2nd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I would like to say, nice uniforms. Cool, but SO GAY!!!!! Leave it to Hadley to pull that bullshit out of his big sieve ass!!!!!! Where did you find the XXXXXXL for Pelletier!?!?!?! Wow that was mean! Sorry Rob! No I'm not!!!!!!
Response:

Slap Happy

BY: kpark
Jan 2nd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Nicely put Mr. Johnson! Here is my two cents. Tao Smith is a bum and should be kicked out of the league!!!!!! Just kidding. I think some players just need to learn how to slow the game down. Everything isn't about going 120 MPH up and down the ice. Men's League is about old men moving latterally. I personally think the trade and with some of the younger players leaving you guys on the right path.
Response:

Pond Hockey

BY: kpark
Jan 5th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Hey, anyone up for some pond hockey on Saturday? In Quechee someone went out onto a pond and carved out two rinks out of the snow with a quad and plow. Looks pretty sweet! It is the pond / lake right off of Quechee Main St. If you are heading from NH on Rte. 4, take a right onto Quechee Main St. at Fat Hat Clothing. Follow for about a mile or so and on your left you see it. The weather isn't supposed to top 31 degrees before Sunday so it should be perfect for us. I'll most likely be there around noon as I need my beauty sleep. Hadley, you can come but only if you put a mask over that horror show of a face. So who's interested?
Response:

Mr. Aldrich!!!

BY: kpark
Jan 6th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


First of all, they blackballed us because I wouldn't do the interview in the shower. I wanted a sexy interview with me lounging naked in a seductive manner across the bench, but the guy wouldn't go for it! Secondly, Mr. Aldrich, you are just jealous because I lit you up like a flaming bag O' poo!!!!!! You did come out on top with a 6-5 Shootout win though, I will give you some credit, nicely done!!!! I am going to score 18 1/2 goals on you next time Pete, BE READY!!!!!!!!
Response:

Whats up with WCAX?

BY: paldrich
Jan 6th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Hey what gives with WCAX? No news on us at 6 or 11. Rumour has it that we are being blackballed because Kelly kept requesting to be interviewed in the shower.
Response:

Marsy, gone?

BY: Tao Smith
Jan 7th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


What the..? How could the guy just walk out on the league? I mean, doesn't he know there is no "I" in team? I guess we're all a bit better off. Now we won't have to pay that insurance premium the refs made us take out on them for liability. Just kidding, Marshy! We'll miss you in the ole' UVHL. Don't worry, I'm gunning for Kelly. I'm just biding my time, waiting for that perfect opportunity..... he won't know what hit him.
Response:

Back to the motherland(not Africa)

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 7th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Well boys, if you don't already know, I've moved back to Canada. I don't really want to air my personal problems on this website, but I will say that marriage did not exactly work out. I really enjoyed the competitive play in the UVHL, and I wish everyone the best of luck in the New Year. To everyone though, I made a lot of good friendships, and I'll keep in touch. But for God sakes, somebody take out Park! Just kidding Kell, Take care everyone. Hopefully McDermott will enter the team in the Montreal tourney in end-Apr, ear-May. Peace Out, MARSHY!
Response:

Marshy, Marshy, Marshy!!!!

BY: kpark
Jan 8th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Hey Bud, you will surely be missed, but at least I don't have to worry about anyone catching me for 2nd in the scoring race since Pelletier is a joke and Tao can't stand up on skates. Tao, I loved your comment about the insurance premiums for the refs, that was AWESOME, I almost pissed myself!!!! Ok, I did piss myself! HOpe you work out your personal problems and make sure to come down and visit!!!!! Talk to you soon.
Response:

oops

BY: paldrich
Jan 9th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


a little premature posting. Sorry to see you leave. I can't say as i will miss getting tatooed with that heavy slapper though. I will make sure park finishes the season with at least a couple of false teeth. Good luck

Response:

Sorry Marshy!

BY: paldrich
Jan 9th, 2005 @ 12:00AM



Response:

Tao is a sissy!!!

BY: kpark
Jan 12th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


It's true Tao is a sissy! He fell over trying to reach for a puck that he could have gotten with his stick if he wasn't so lazy!!!!! He just fell over and bumped his shoulder! He'll be back in time to not pass it to me against the Blackhawks. Maybe it affected his tunnel vision! I doubt it, but wishful thinking huh? Just kidding Tao, hope your shoulder is ok. Let us know what's up!!!!
Response:

Tao

BY: chrisj
Jan 12th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Anyone find out if Tao got hurt badly?...It looked nasty from bench
Response:

Relief

BY: paldrich
Jan 13th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Tao, glad to hear you are ok. The UVHL will catorgorize your injury as an upper body injury so we don't leak too much info!. As far as Kelly's point s, I don't think you have to worry. I think he was pointless for the rangers tuesday night. I heard him muttering some lame excuse about the flu!
Response:

BY: Tao Smith
Jan 13th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Thanks for asking, Chris. I think that I dislocated my shoulder when I fell on it. Kelly's right, I had no business trying to stop that puck with my hand. I was thinking I could play like a twenty-year old, and after foolishly injuring myself I felt shame. I understand from the guys that I didn't even stop the puck. Double shame.

It doesn't hurt too badly right now, as long as I don't move it. I kind of doubt that I'll be back by Tuesday, but maybe the week after. Don't worry though - I'll be coaching from the bench to make sure that I short-shift Kelly to keep him from getting too many more points.
Response:

Marsh

BY: dcoff13
Jan 14th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Hey Happy Gilmore, you can't skate for shit anyways... to a speedy return...
Response:

Tao stop being a sissy and play!

BY: kpark
Jan 14th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Yeah, you heard me. Stop being a sissy! And as for Mr. Aldrich! I had 3 points the other night while playing sick, so I don't want to hear it!!!!!! You had better bring your AAAA+++++++ game next time we play because I am going to burn you like a candle after I take a steaming shit!!!!! By the way, you played pretty well against us the other night.
Response:

I'm Back

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 19th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Well, After a brief return to Canada to blow off some steam, I'm back, Too bad i can't buy a fucking goal. Glad to be back, See you on the ice.
Response:

pissmoff

BY: tgove
Jan 20th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


to whom ever came up with this weeks poll! they are already kicken your ass on a weekly basis why make them mad also?
Response:

update

BY: chrisj
Jan 20th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


What happened to updating the website?...kinda getting slower each week
Response:

stats

BY: tgove
Jan 21st, 2005 @ 12:00AM


maybe if jt's got the stat sheet that is why his gaa is so low and his employees husband has so many points
Response:

kpark

BY: tgove
Jan 21st, 2005 @ 12:00AM


park if I didnt have that rule book you would still be walking around trying to make youself bleed and looking for someone who cared! you need to stop hogging the puck, maybe once in a while be the third assist thats not registered on the score sheet, even try a little defense (you know the posistion your dad played) maybe you should just play field hockey or go back to figure skating or dammit make almost everyone happy and stay at home!
Response:

turner

BY: chrisj
Jan 21st, 2005 @ 12:00AM


who gave the stat sheets to turner?...by the way kelly turner told me to whack you in the mouth because he was sick of listening to it!!
Response:

Watch the potty mouth

BY: Tao Smith
Jan 21st, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Hey, Kelly and the rest of you goons: Watch the potty mouth. This is a public site and we're doing this, you know, for the fans. A lot of the UVHL fans are kids under the age of four (of the six UVHL fans, two of them are three years old), and we don't want to give them the wrong impression about our players or our league. We may be turning off the next generation of UVHL'ers by disrespecting eachother with foul tounges. So shuth the f*#@! up, you bas*#@!*. And, I agree - what is up with the slow updates? We're reading write-ups from, like, weeks ago.
Response:

Nice to have you back Marshy

BY: kpark
Jan 21st, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Hey, it is nice to have you back, but I don't have any problems with you being a in a scoring drought. I am actually very ok with that!!!!!
Response:

Shut it Gove.

BY: kpark
Jan 21st, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Gove, you're a bum!!!!!! And that is all going to change when we play them again! And good thing you brought that rule book. Maybe you should spend an hour a night studying. And sorry for spitting blood on the ice. Additionally, we are going to light up the Bruins for 10 goals next week. Keep an eye on Pelletier, he's a sneaky goon.
Response:

I agree

BY: kpark
Jan 21st, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Blame Turner!!!!!! He has the score sheets. By the way, you're an asshole!!!!! Keep your stick down Johnson!!!
Response:

wow!!!

BY: tgove
Jan 22nd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


JT you must read the words of one chris johnson as in time he has so wisely figured out that we as refs are not there to ruin the tuesday night league but to make it a fun family atmosphere for all to enjoy. It gives me no pleasure to make enemies with anyone and those who have had the opp. to play on the ice surface while I attempt to officiate the game have found that I enjoy the barbs with all. JT You do know you have started a war and the man with the prison looking outfit will prevail. In a more serious set of words thank you chris for your kind words.
Response:

defense

BY: chrisj
Jan 22nd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I must say in defense to tony, all of whom know I have traded words with this season, that it is unfortunate that as a result of the call a shutout was ruined but in the end the correct call was made and explained in a thoughtful and professional manner. Hats off to tony. It is also unfortunate that the call went against the hawks because it looked as if the johnson- sheehan connection was about to light up the scoreboard!
Response:

newspaper reporter (jt)

BY: tgove
Jan 22nd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


A note to the individual who rights the sometimes very nice recaps of the tuesday night hockey. You should know that it is never very wise to try to downgrade the officials as in the future you may find yourself being the subject under the micro-scope Do not forget that goaltenders serve any penalty above a minor IE: misconduct or major,possibly a game suspension. in closing officiating GODS "say never mess with the man in Black"
Response:

suck up

BY: tgove
Jan 23rd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


sorry my feelings have been scarred by your butchering comments so keep your stick down and dont knock the net off!!!!!
Response:

Just waxing poetic!

BY: jt
Jan 23rd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Tony, you look good in pinstripes! You did make the right call... no question. Just busting you. You and the other refs are doing a great job. I also appreciate that you stepped up a knotch over the past few weeks. I think there has been a lot of undeserved flack sent your way. I think we need to be tougher on stick infractions as well. The past two weeks saw players going home cut up. Keep up the great work! Thanks guys, see you Tuesday!
Response:

parks points

BY: tgove
Jan 24th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I was out at cardigan tonight to ref a game and low & behold there was sinclair, yes kelly we spoke about you and the amount $$$ to make sure you dont get the points lead away from him. I'm out there again wednesday and should be picking up a pretty good check! Oh & the outlook for his return is Dismal!
Response:

BY: tgove
Jan 24th, 2005 @ 12:00AM



Response:

Nice Pic

BY: kpark
Jan 24th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Hey Marshy, I agree. I have yet to hit anyone in the face with my stick because I am NOT a SCUMBAG like some folks in the league. I don't want to name any names because it might make Chris cry. But seriously maybe it's just me because that asshole Andy Holland clipped me in the face 3 weeks ago cutting my chin open too. Maybe you're all just jealous of how hot I am and want to ugly me up good styles. Apparently my plan of choosing NOT to be drafted by the Bruins because I'm too pretty and didn't want to mess up my face is backfiring. DAMNIT!!!!! By the way, I like your picture Marshy, she's hot!!!!
Response:

No Cages

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 24th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I think the stick infractions in the league, although minimal, would be greatly reduced if we went to a no-cage rule. I keep my stick down, and I have yet to be the cause of any spilled blood. Hopefully I don't get the stickwork Kelly recieved last week. I wouldn't want to be in their shoes.
Response:

me

BY: chrisj
Jan 24th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I chose this one, because it reminds me of what happens to me when I go to the net with park behind me
Response:

No Problem

BY: kpark
Jan 24th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Yeah, I am gonna keep adding them. My favorite for the moment is Ashley Judd from her KU Hockey Calendar. If you guys have any other ideas, let me know. I was thinking of doing the Miracle on Ice one, maybe a Canadien flag for some of you Canucks.
Response:

BY: sfras
Jan 24th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


What I meant was........

Nice new images.
thanks
Response:

BY: sfras
Jan 24th, 2005 @ 12:00AM



Response:

Yeah, I was just having some fun

BY: kpark
Jan 24th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Did you feel bad for me when you were reading that? I got a good chuckle out of it. Yeah, JT was nasty against us. That bastard is killing my PPG average. I am aiming for his juggular the next time we play him.
Response:

New Images to Choose From.

BY: kpark
Jan 24th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Hey Guys, I have added a bunch of new images to choose from for your profile. Just go to Personal Settings. I have added some Ref ones for the know it all bum that keeps chirpin' in here and then some movie images from Slap Shot and Youngblood, as well as an NHL Logo, Mr. Hockey OH, and how could I forget Kerry Fraser!!! If you have any ideas or pictures that you want added email them to me at kpark@parkcreative.com. See you on the ice punks
Response:

Damn, Ed

BY: kpark
Jan 24th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Ed, I send out my appologies, but Seriously, who ditches hockey for a Date. Chris Johnson found that out the hard way as girls were going out with them because they wanted a gay friend who could help them shop!!!!! Next time you do it, you're fined by the UVHL $25 and a round of beer for all.
Response:

Duh!!

BY: chrisj
Jan 24th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Don't say I didn't tell you so!
Response:

P.O.W.

BY: chrisj
Jan 24th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I did vote for JT for player of the week, he was outstanding in 2 straight games! Don't try so hard next time
Response:

Edzo misses Tuck game for "friend"

BY: edzo
Jan 24th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Well, good things never come out of missing a hockey game. It turns out that the attractive young lady JT and O'Neil set me up with (the one I missed the Tuck game to meet) is "in friend mode" and "excited to meet a new friend in the upper valley." ( to quote directly from her email). I'm slipping -sually it takes me at least a date or two to get in the friend box. Anyway, lesson learned-don't miss hockey for chicks. And I do still appreciate JT and Mike for the effort-apparently I need all the help I can get. My one consolation is that JT saw a shitload rubber that game-could have used an extra D back there, huh buddy?
-Sheehan
Response:

kidding

BY: chrisj
Jan 24th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I am glad you were kidding, I need you to set me up in the travel team game!! I was dissapointed to see that JT didn't give me credit for the assist in the ranger game. I only got credit for 1 goal 1 assist, the zebra said the goal counted.
Response:

Parks lips

BY: paldrich
Jan 24th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Kelly, I think the problem with your lips is related more to the company you keep at Bently's after the game. Maybe they can do us a favor and stitch your lips together! Just kidding big guy, now take off that field hockey skirt and lace up the skates!
Response:

Johnson Done for Year.

BY: kpark
Jan 24th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


After a devastating stick to the face by Chris Johnson, both of my lips we sliced open and a tooth cracked last Tuesday. I was experiencing some pain and swelling this weekend and made a trip to the emergency room for a check-up as I was extremely uncomfortable. It appears that I have gotten a bacterial infection in my upper lip and it may have moved to my lower lip as well. I am due for another check up this afternoon where they will determine whether a portion of my lip will need to be removed to stop this infection from traveling further to throat, eyes or even worse my brain my brain. So Gove, I don't appreciate you saying that I was spitting blood all over the ice for attention. I ask that you all pray for me and I will not be able to play on Tuesday night. By the way, I'm just kidding, Chris you are still an asshole though!!!!!!
Response:

OUCH!!!!

BY: kpark
Jan 24th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


You cut me deep Gove, you cut me real deep! You know Tony, you don't have to be so mean! I have feelings too! And as for Field Hockey, I tried it and was sick of getting my ass whooped by little girls so I quite. I like hogging the puck because Tao won't pass me the puck. Keep your head up this week Gove, I wouldn't want to ACCIDENTALLY run your ass over!!!!
Response:

disagree on no face masks

BY: tgove
Jan 25th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I disagree on the no face masks in the league! besides you cannot ban them from the players who chose to wear them. I would prefer that you went the oppisite direction and made face masks mandatory for all players. (even park) I do not believe that high sticks are becoming the norm but as the league gets more competitive the amount of contact by both body and sticks seems to increase. I hope you all understand why it took some time to make a ruling on the johnson penalty the other night,had it been a slash or a body check it would have taken only a second but in all fairness because If kelly had a face mask it would have been only a minor penalty (even though it was chris and the hit was against park) Thanks for all the understanding JT and keep those sticks down.
Response:

disagree on no face masks

BY: tgove
Jan 25th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I disagree on the no face masks in the league! besides you cannot ban them from the players who chose to wear them. I would prefer that you went the oppisite direction and made face masks mandatory for all players. (even park) I do not believe that high sticks are becoming the norm but as the league gets more competitive the amount of contact by both body and sticks seems to increase. I hope you all understand why it took some time to make a ruling on the johnson penalty the other night,had it been a slash or a body check it would have taken only a second but in all fairness because If kelly had a face mask it would have been only a minor penalty (even though it was chris and the hit was against park) Thanks for all the understanding JT and keep those sticks down.
Response:

That sucks

BY: kpark
Jan 25th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


As much as I'd love to take over the scoring title, the Bruins SUCK without Sinky. So I wish him a hasty return. As well as the asterisk that will go by my name if I win as Sinclair will have played only 3 games to my 25. Hurry up and heal Ryan, the Bruins are desperate and have called in all of their reinforcements with no improvements.
Response:

More

BY: Tao Smith
Jan 26th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Actually, a better excuse for putting paper bags over their heads.
Response:

One more thing

BY: Tao Smith
Jan 26th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Oh yeah, by the way, this is a photo of Greg and Kelly, taken after one of the UVHL games. Poster children for the use of face masks.
Response:

Out to lunch

BY: Tao Smith
Jan 26th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I agree with Tony, you guys are out to lunch. Apparently, it is from taking too many knocks to the head. Get a face mask and quit complaining, you goons. Just because a few scars might improve your face doesn't mean that the rest of us want that kind of cosmetic surgery. Besides, pucks will be shot high and deflected, and because even NHLers can't always control their sticks people will get hit high. A face mask easily solves that problem. no need to drag the rest of us into your crazy world. Oh yeah, Marshy, just because I've been on the injured reserve doesn't mean that you have the ability to pass me in the scoring catagory. I've spoken with league officials who have agreed to credit both me and Sinclair a point for each point that another player scores each night. That means that Ryan and I each received forty points last night. Best of luck.
Response:

let the refs,ref & be quiet!!

BY: tgove
Jan 27th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Kelly there you go again whining! you take care of the matter at hand which is trying to catch sinclair and leave the rule book up to us highly trained professionals. I do know why your wife lets you out to play hockey and its so she doesnt have to listen to you whine. Now also I will not be as nice as the rest and say I'm just joking with you because I'm not!!! quit coddeling the boy and tell it like you mean it!!
Response:

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 27th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Good call Kelly. I really appreciate your insight to this matter, however, quit your fuckin cryin', and play some hockey! Just rippin on yah, anyway boys keep the sticks down and the game tight!
Response:

Thoughts on hacking & two-handing.

BY: kpark
Jan 27th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I have personally noticed an increase of whacking and hacking and stickwork that's going on and have heard some other people complain and was wondering if anyone else has any thoughts. In my opinion, you can haul me down, trip me, hook me and play rough on the boards but the minute that I get a two hand across the legs or hands I start getting pissed. There is no need for that in Men's League where people are showing up on a weekly basis for some fun and good competition. You can be competitive without all of the hacking. Any thoughts?
Response:

NOT!!!

BY: tgove
Jan 28th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Kelly If you are not allowed in the rink how will you be able to bring it up to the board. Oh and by the way who is on the board. JT,Shawn & oh yeah ME!! and lets see oh cant forget this none of those three like you they all think you are a whinning candy ass!!oh and again I'm not kidding!!
Response:

That's Harsh

BY: kpark
Jan 28th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Now I have proof GOVE, by writing that I will bring you up in front of the board of comissioners for disorderly conduct and negligence!!!!!!
Response:

MR.Aldrich

BY: tgove
Jan 28th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Please remind me the next time you play against kelly so I know the wack on him is coming and I turn away from the play. Cant call what I dont (want) to see!!
Response:

My thoughs on Park

BY: paldrich
Jan 28th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Stop being such a candy ass! I am begining to think those split lips are between your legs and not on your face. I can't wait to play you again. That big two hander to your spine will be from me cleaning you out of my crease. From your observations, Gove is blind, so he might not see it. Now if thats not ripping on you I don't know what is!
Response:

Shut it Gove!

BY: kpark
Jan 28th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Well, Gove, if you and the other blind mice would do your jobs and maybe......possibly.....just maybe try and memorize the rule book, we could have some fun out there, but we are constantly questioning calls and missed calls by the horrible officiating going on. I would tell you that I'm kidding but then again I might not be lieing about telling the truth which could be convoluted as being a joke in the aftermath of an incident that may or may not have been the equivialent of the truth of the matter of fact in which I was just joking about telling it how it is in an attempt to make you read this really long sentence that makes no sense.
Response:

Awards banquet

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 29th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Hey Shaun and JT, what do you think about a year-end awards banquet? This would be a fun night for all, and I would be happy to organize something. If everyone pitched in 15-20 dollars we could likely put a buffet-style dinner, at a location somewhere around here. Let's have some input from everyone, and maybe this will happen. Really, I just want to get dressed up, get pissed and hit on Kelly's wife. Ha Ha just kidding Kell.
Response:

Hey JT!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 29th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Marshy here, I've been to a few businesses for sponsorship, and they might as well have booted me out the door. I really don't know many people or places to go. Can I just sell 30-40 tickets instead of ad space? My 10 tickets are already sold, I need more. Let me know on Sunday night @ Hartford High. MARSHY
Response:

BY: THE HACKER
Jan 29th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


No Hate, No Hiding, Just serving up some cheese with all that Whine.

Tony DeFelice
Response:

Feel the hate!

BY: Tao Smith
Jan 29th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


So much anger. So much hate...
Response:

who is behind bashing you kelly

BY: tgove
Jan 29th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Kelly you need to find out who that is hiding behind the name "HACKER" ya see I thought of coming up with a fake name so I could bash you and make you nervous about who it is that hates you! BUT that is not me, I'm upfront with my dislike of 2nd place players!
Response:

Guilty

BY: THE HACKER
Jan 29th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


"Mr. 2nd place in the points standings" hit the nail on the head last week when he pointed out to me that I am a pussy and hack people with my stick only to try to compensate for my complete lack of natural ability and physical conditioning. Unfortunatly the hockey in my blood entered through and open wound suffered in Mite B Squad practice, not the Park gene pool, so I have to make up ground somewhere. What the "points runner up" fails to grasp is the stress release found in cracking someone like him in the knuckles with a large stick, If not for this pleaseure I might have to take out my domestic frustrations on someone in the genereal public and end up in the pokey instead of the penalty box. Which brings me to my next justification for being a cheap fucker on the ice, penalties. This year my skillful stickwork and overly aggessive play he complains about has drawn roughly 2 penalties against the opposing team per game, while I personally am averaging well below 1 trip to the box per game, Netting my team more than a 1 powerplay per game advantage. Hmmm.

Other notes:
I have not seen anyone on the ice this year TRYING to hurt anybody. That would be BAD and should result in severe punishment.

Dont like getting sticks in the face? Try a cage, I hear 2-3 sticks per game whack off that funny little metal thing in front of my fat head but you know what? It doesnt hurt, So I dont bitch about my face getting bloody, so I can focus on bitching at Tony Gove and his blind freinds.
Response:

Game Recaps

BY: sfras
Jan 30th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Hey is there anyhting that can be done about the longer game recaps? When the recap is longer then the page. i.e Bruins vs Rangers OT game, you miss most of the story. Can that please be changed.

Thank You.

Now quit bitchin bout high sticks and fix the web site.....just kidding

Response:

Nice Marshy!!!!

BY: kpark
Jan 30th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Guess who just read that with me! My Lady!!!!! We got a good chuckle out of that. I agree, that would be a blast. Hadley, I'm sleeping over! Try not to touch me when I'm passed out! Ok, never mind, I'm NOT staying over Hadley's he's kind of creepy!
Response:

To one and all!

BY: kpark
Jan 30th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Oh Pete, by the way, I loved the "split lips between the legs" comment. That was awesome! Keep trashing me, I LOVE IT!!!! Secondly, Tony, players shouldn't HAVE to wear a cage. Players should have the common sense and responsibility to keep their sticks down. I know that there are mistakes every once in awhile, but there are certain players that get their sticks up on a weekly basis. You keep your stick low, but it is the two handing that pisses me off and that is the ONLY thing that I will bitch and whine about. It's men's league hockey, we all PAY to play and I don't need to go into work with bone bruises on my wrists every Wednesday. Sure your penalty minutes are low because Gove and the other blind mice don't see the quick short whacks on the wrists, thighs & legs. Be agressive without swinging your stick like a pussy! And I mean that in the nicest possible way. Weilding your stick like a sword takes no talent and just plain pisses people off. Thridly, Tao, shut your mouth, you're a sissy, Gove you smell, Pete you couldn't catch Herpes and Chris Johnson may or may not like little boys.
Response:

Consider it DONE!

BY: kpark
Jan 31st, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Yo Sasafras! Consider it done! My bad, but blame McDermott for being a long-winded bastard! Ha just kidding, I LOVE those write-ups, especially when he trashes me! Keep the trash talk coming guys, it's awesome! Oh and what does everyone think about the game write-ups? Make sure you let the commishes know how much you appreciate them so they are more motivated to get them done early each week!
Response:

hadleys helping park

BY: tgove
Feb 1st, 2005 @ 12:00AM


wow first shot of the game! I think hadleys helping park to catch sinclair! has to be that shot wasnt that hard and it wasn't screened!!come on hadley make kelly earn them!!
Response:

wow what a bash on park

BY: tgove
Feb 1st, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I cant believe how bad you bashed kelly on the fact that he cant score on any goalie esp. hadley. Park ; maybe if you do the same as if you were at home and ask pretty please you may get to score at the rink also!! Oh kelly it is so much fun to bash you and so easy. also I'm sorry or kidding like everyone else who try's not to hurt your feelings.
Response:

BY: sfras
Feb 1st, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Kelly have you ever heard the phrase " Even a blind squirrel finds a nut occasionally"? So maybee you are due for a goal. If there is a shoot out though we know we are safe. Rumor is you cant score when its just you and the goalie......We will just have to wait and see how it goes.
Response:

I'm gonna light up Hadley!

BY: kpark
Feb 1st, 2005 @ 12:00AM


First I would like to express how happy I am that "captain 5-hole" Hadley is playing net tonight instead of Weglarz! Maybe I'll finally be able to score!
Response:

Spell check

BY: tgove
Feb 2nd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


come on park work on the web site and add spell check and an edit device!! lets go boy you dont have a job so you have time to do this.
Response:

HURTIN BAD

BY: tgove
Feb 2nd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Kelly, thanks for asking! I blitz mailed steve popeo today and his response back was that the player has very badly bruised ribs, He will most likely miss the annual tuck tourney this coming week end at Dartmouth which is a shame. At this time I wont comment about this any further, UVHL IS A NO CHECK LEAGUE!!!
Response:

BY: sfras
Feb 2nd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


That would be spell by the way.

I wish you could edit your own messages.
Response:

BY: sfras
Feb 2nd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Hey Kelley you speel that last name Fraser. There is no I in it....lol
Hey I see you found your "nuts" last night... I must admit I got nervous when you scored your first "gimmie" goal, it didnt last long. We knew we could come back. It was a good game.

Response:

Status on Tuck

BY: kpark
Feb 2nd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Hey, I was wondering what ended up happening to the Tuck player that got hurt last night. There were rumors about broken ribs & punctured lungs. I hope not. Let us know what's going on. By the way, Tom you're a GOON, 18 penalty minutes last night!!!!! Thanks.
Response:

Wow

BY: kpark
Feb 2nd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Frasier, that's not nice. I have feelings too, oh, wait, nope I don't. Anyways, that was a heartbreaker last night, I can't believe you bastards won that game, but all that matters is that I made Hadley look stupid, I honestly don't care if we ever win or lose, just as long as I pad my stats and make Hadley flop around like a big fat Tuna being analy rapped by a spear, because that's exactly what he looked like. But seriously, nice game Bruins, don't worry we'll get you next time. I would like to give a shoutout to THE HACKER and say nice game last night, no complaints here except for Andy Holland shooting that puck right into my hand, that hurt, oh and refs made some very insensitive remarks to me, but if I worried what a blind Paul Stewart wannabe thought of me, I'd be in trouble. You're A BUM GOVE!!!!
Response:

the check has cleared the bank!!

BY: tgove
Feb 3rd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


well Mr. Park the check came in and cleared the bank! Now you will never get points to get past sinclair!! of course you could pay more and it will be an easy pass!! but then is there enough time???
Response:

that you did

BY: kpark
Feb 3rd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


You certainly did. I might owe Holland 3 or 4 beers. Of course he TOTALLY REDEEMED himself by scoring the game winner as I completely and utterly screened Pete like an asshole.
Response:

BY: sfras
Feb 3rd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Those were very nice assists from Mr Holland. I think you owe him a Beer or two.

Of course I knew there was no extra E in your name, but I got your attention by spelling it that way.
Response:

Let's talk about spelling for a second!

BY: kpark
Feb 3rd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


OK, Fraser. First of all, my name is spelled Kelly, NOT Kelley. I need to get as much masculinity out of my name as I can get and the extra E adds a wee bit of a feminine touch. Secondly, I like the spelling of Frasier better than Fraser. Is that pronounced like Laser? That's you're new nickname, THE LASER!!!!! Thirdly, why does GOVE still write into this thing. Doesn't he realize that we aren't going to pay attention to him until he actually makes a decent call in the league! That's about it. Oh and yeah, that was a great game the other night. I would like to thank Mr. Andy Holland for dishing those two assists to me! Thanks Andy!!!!!
Response:

Thanks Gove

BY: kpark
Feb 3rd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Thanks Tony for the investigative work. Hope all is well and to a speedy recovery. Dakai, you're a gooooon! Just Kidding. I personally didn't think it was a check, he was more or less rubbing him out going for the puck. But that's just my opinion.
Response:

Ribs?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 5th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Mmmmm did someone say ribs? Ha, just kidding. Besides, I like my wings after hockey. Hawks Vs. Tuck this week. Hopefully there won't be anyone letting out their frustration on the Hawks. We'll have to put the foil on eh Johnson? Hey Pelletier, I plan on passing you this week in the scoring race, so don't get upset. Besides there should be an asterisk(*) beside your stats- (Sinclair) Just kiddind pal, Look out for the Hawks in the playoffs. GIT ER DUN Boys!!
Response:

let's pick up our play, not our sticks!

BY: jt
Feb 6th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


There have been too many penalties and injuries of late. I could list them if necessary! We need to rise to the occasion and bring our level of play up. I for one, will be asking Tony to call every stick infraction (during and after the play) I love this league, but we (everyone) can do better. What do you think?
Response:

What does Turner know

BY: kpark
Feb 7th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


You're a goalie! And a nearsighted one as is, so you can't even see past your crease! Just kidding. I agree, this aint the NHL and we don't need anyone gooning it up with their sticks, so lets all try to keep it clean yet competitive.
Response:

I thought it was just rough play.

BY: kpark
Feb 8th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


From what I saw from the bench is that both players were being physical in the corner and the puck popped out up the boards, they both were skating for it and Tom was just pinching him out going for the puck. Talking to him and seeing the play, it didn't seem intentional or a cheap shot, just a physical and strong player going for the puck. Dakai you're gonna have to stay away from the gym!!!!
Response:

WHAT!?!?!?

BY: kpark
Feb 8th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Puck Hog. McDermott did you just call me a Puck Hog? You haven't seen puck hogging like what is going to happen tonight! Especially against that Travel Team Defense. I'll turn them inside out and then right side in and then topside over and then ass over tea kettle before making either Phil or Aldrich look extremely confused and dumbfounded in net. Just try and stop me HCKYDOC!!!!
Response:

Was it a cheap shot?

BY: hkydoc
Feb 8th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I didn't see the hit, and nobody wants anyone to get hurt, but was it a cheap shot or just a hard hit? Let me know your thoughts.
Response:

You're mine, Park!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 8th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


You won't get a point as long as I'm on the ice, Park! The Tuck player, Tom Felago, has bruised ribs, no fracture (thank goodness). I don't think you can pass SInclair puck hog!
Response:

Hey Gove

BY: kpark
Feb 8th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


You make sure you bring you're bifocals tonight as I'm planning on passing passing Sinclair tonight when the Rangers play the Travel Team. And yes, I know, It will have taken me 15 more games, 3 times as much energy, a ton of luck and a lot of cheating on the website to do it, but I can accept that considering I am a washed up Never-Was web geek. See you on the ice and watch me turn those Travel Team defensemen like the tea cup ride full of puking children. Ha Ha Ha.
Response:

aint that the truth!!

BY: tgove
Feb 8th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


oh kelly you always amaze me, you bash the hell out of someone then tell them your kidding. jt had tears before he knew you were joking. then you actually come back with something inteligent. You are right ,there is no plce for goons in the UVHL! Do we have goons? NO just a diff in the level of each player. just remember boys there are no scouts (except kellys brothers) there are no million dollar contracts or any contracts as far as that goes , This is as high a level as your going and WE ALL have to get up Wednesday morning (except home school) and go to work Healthy we hope. So the moral of the story is this Ladies & Gentleman play hard & Have Fun!
Response:

Park is my bitch!

BY: paldrich
Feb 9th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Believe it Park! After all the mouthing off, I slammed the door on you harder than an irritated housewife does to a travelling salesman. I don't think we will play again this year, so that means i have bragging rights all summer! Get set for some serious e-mail abuse!
Response:

BY: sfras
Feb 9th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Kelly at least you can admit it, and that is half the battle right there.

Good job Travel,,er Scrimage squad. Whatever you guys are called.
Response:

Pete Aldrich is MY DADDY!!!!!

BY: kpark
Feb 9th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


After last nights debacle, I would just like to state that Pete Aldrich is My Daddy! I was hoping to get at least 9 points off of him in net but he shut down the Rangers 5-1 only allowing me a LUCKY power play goal. You my daddy Pete, I said it!!!!
Response:

NEW PROGRAM!!

BY: tgove
Feb 9th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


GEE kelly I think I will start a new apprentiship program where you get to come out and TRY to ref a game, Then we will see where your opinion gets you! you guys are going to create your own mountains if you all have opinions of your playing in a manor of one sided. the shot was a check not a pinch and again dont forget everyone is suppose to get up wednesday to go to work! uninjured!! tired but uninjured!!
Response:

Nice Marshy

BY: kpark
Feb 10th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I don't do the stats, Turner does. Did you have any points against Tuck? Oh did I mention that I sucked against the Travel Team and Pete Aldrich is my Daddy!?!?!?!
Response:

Where's my points?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 10th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Park, did you update the points from Tues.? I don't think you did. I am trying my best to catch the top three, and you're making twice as hard. (4points Tues,) Just a reminder.
Response:

Good one, Marsh

BY: Tao Smith
Feb 12th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Oh, nice, Marshy. You puck hog! You're just lucky that I've been injured for a month, or both you and Rob would be sucking my exhaust. And, Kelly, if you'd pass the friggin puck once in a while we might have won that game last week. Yeah, I blame you! Gotta blame someone...And Gove - open up your eyes! If Daki's contact on that Tuck player was a "check" then what was that hit I took from one of their players at mid ice? Or did the wind just get knocked out of me by a ghost? My ribs are still sore from that collision to my back. But I forget, you're only calling penalties against the Rangers now. That's why we've played the last THREE OUT OF SIX PERIODS A MAN DOWN! What ever happened to referee impartiality?
Response:

Tao, are you dreaming?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 13th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


You would still not have gotten six points in 2-3 games. But I'd love to see you try. I agree, the boys from Tuck do play pretty rough, but it usually makes me play harder. Unless they really piss me off. I would have had another goal, if you hadn't mauled me from behind. Actually, Turner might have shut the door. I was going to say "There's always next year" but there's no way in hell you'll ever beat me out of the scoring race. Se what you got 2 nite @ Hartford. We're playing TT against Potter. Take a nap if you need it.!
Response:

Maple Leafs Suck

BY: kpark
Feb 14th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I just wanted you all to know that we are going to SPANK the Maple Leafs this week and keep them in 4th place. I am going to twist Lallier into some sort of pretzel looking goalie, turn Clabough inside out, make Fitzy cry and shoot a puck right at Gove's groin. I hope he forgets his cup.!!!! Not that he really needs one! OUCH!!!! Any thoughts?
Response:

BY: hkydoc
Feb 15th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Are you sure you want a first round match up with Tuck, Park? Methinks the Leafs are the only team with a chance to upset Tuck, so bend over and throw the game so you get the Bruins in the first round! Just keep Robbins and O'Neil on the ice for long shifts so it doesn't look so suspicious. Actually, based on their performances against the Weglarz in net Bruins BOTH teams SUCK the big one!!! Chew on that.
Response:

I would like to recant my statement.

BY: kpark
Feb 17th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Unfortunately, the Maple Leafs thoroughly handed our asses to us and I have found another new Daddy in Kenny Lallier. Damn, there are a ton of kids with NO daddy, and here I am with two, Pete & Kenny, I am soooooooo lucky!!!!!
Response:

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 19th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


We need some porn on the personal settings
Response:

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 19th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Kelly, you should give the team a good pep-talk before the game on Tues. If we can't have a chance in the playoffs, I would personally love to light up JT. I'm setting my sights on a Hawks victory, to salvage some dignity on the season.
Response:

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 19th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I'll bet that rest of the UVHL is trembling in their skates at the Hawks chances in the playoffs. Well, maybe not. If we play the Rangers in the first round, Tao and Homeschool will probably blow it. On a more serious note, Shawn, Ed and I came to the hawks to try and balance things out. Since then we have won 1 game barely. We have no shot. I don't mean to bring down the morale, but SERIOUSLY!
Response:

I'll pull a Pete Rose, any takers?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 19th, 2005 @ 12:00AM



Response:

Ladies Please

BY: kpark
Feb 20th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


First and foremost, Marshy and CJ, maybe if you two back checked a little bit and tried to play two way hockey, you wouldn't need my daddy to stand on his head. Secondly, I won't be able to make the game on Tuesday night as the Woodstock High Team has made it to the State Semi-Finals under my vast knowledge and tutalage and we play at the GUT(Gutterson Arena at UVM) on Tuesday night, so I leave it to my Rangers to bust you bitches up. Stop whining and learn how to play the game, boo fuckin' who, we can't win a game!!!!!! Oh, Marshy, Pelletier won't be there either so you can pass him in the points standings!!!!
Response:

Don't say never

BY: chrisj
Feb 20th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


If we give Phil a case of red bull before the game he may stand on his head and pull us through...and yes we will light up JT!
Response:

Good Luck to the Rangers

BY: kpark
Feb 22nd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I just wanted to give a shout-out to my boys in Silver as they take on the Blackhawks tonight. Unfortunately I will not be able to make it as I will be coaching the Woodstock Boys Hockey team in the Division 2 State Semif Finals tonight at the Gut. This also means that I will NOT be able to surpass Sinclair for the Scoring title, playing twice as many games as him. Good luck Rangers, not that you'll need it with McDermott playing D, Marshy not back checking and Chris Johnson running around at 200 MPH like a chicken with it's head cut off. YOU'RE MY BOYYYYYY BLUE!!!!!!!
Response:

Park pussies out

BY: paldrich
Feb 23rd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Rumour say that Kelly Park didn't show up at last nights game because he is still distraught over the ass whuppin' that he recieved at the hands of Pete Aldrich.
Response:

commish bails on hawks

BY: chrisj
Feb 24th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Before the final puck drop of the year the commish announced that he and marshy wouldn't be on the hawks next season. But do the Rangers want them back? Could they be left without a team? Only time will tell.
Response:

It's true

BY: kpark
Feb 24th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


All I can say is that it is true. I have lost all confidence!!!
Response:

no prob

BY: chrisj
Feb 25th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


we have a great locker room...JT will get lit up, marshy and I will both score, Phil will play out of his mind, Ed and the 2 Seans will play great D and the Rangers will lose!!!! We have been playing the suckers all year and now we show what we got...be afraid, be very afraid
Response:

Marsh Cheats!

BY: Tao Smith
Feb 25th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Greg, I hope you read this because you are a cheater! I can't believe that you would stoop so low as to hold my jersey after I embarrassed you, beatng you into your defensive zone. I can see how it was your only option at that point, but I can't believe that you would resort to cheating. Shame, shame on the great name of Canada!
Response:

Wow

BY: kpark
Feb 25th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Glad you guys are all on board over there in the Hawks Dressing room to try and beat the Rangers in the Playoffs, maybe you sissy bitches shouldn't even show up. Have a little faith. There have been bigger upsets and with Turner in net, and Ben Robbins on Defense ANYTHING can happen. Oh and look at Mr. Aldrich, talking shit because he has some new pads. I watched old Petey the other night shut down a bunch of ankle benders in the B league and now he has an attitude? Oh, I'm sorry, I shouldn't talk to my Daddy that way. Sorry dad.
Response:

Expansion Squad

BY: paldrich
Feb 25th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Johnson,
Commish, Marshy , me and several other players to be named later are going to form one of the sickest expansion teams known to man and turn the UVHL on its ear! We will be spending the summer training above the arctic circle where we will eat, sleep and shit hockey. Be afraid, be very afraid....
Response:

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 27th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


First things first, Pete. Rule No. 1. I train ONLY in Canada. Rule No. 2, never lose to the Rangers. Since we broke rule no. 2, we'll have to resort to drastic measures. Pete, you'll head up the training regiment, Since you're familiar with Canada, you're driving. I'll make some calls, Norton and Bertuzzi will be skating with us this summer. Next year is still very much up in the air. Johnson, you may not even be a Blackhawk next season. If we skate hard boys, we CAN beat the Rangers. PATIENCE PATIENCE PATIENCE
Response:

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 27th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Park, you're gonna see back checking like you've never seen on Tues. night. We will do our homework, and be ready for the bitch-ass Rangers.
Response:

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 27th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


A " Pete Rose" would have been betting on my own team. Looks like I would have won.
Response:

What's a Pete Rose?

BY: hkydoc
Feb 27th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Is "Pete Rose" the nickname for your penis, Dark Canuck? I don't need to know if you're going to pull it, eh. The Hawks are starting their drive for 3rd place! Yahoo!
Response:

Nice try, Park!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 27th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Looks like your little bribe to JT didn't work! I saw thegame sheets with your little points added on a night you weren't there! NONE of your points should count, except the breakaways, that way we all know they're legit. Get ready to get upset by the Hawks! Sinclair is the best UVHL scorer ever, and you'll always be in his shadow, Park!
Response:

BY: hkydoc
Feb 27th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Hello, boys. Commish here. Get ready for a great game Tuesday night cuz the Hawks are ready! As far as next year goes, all teams are up for reorganization, so start planning now! We may do a draft, we may have the captains organize their 14-man rosters (plus a goalie) themselves. It will depend on if we have 4 really strong teams, or if we go with 6 mediochre teams. Good luck in the playoffs, boys!
Response:

I feel bad for the Hawks

BY: kpark
Feb 28th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Poor Poor Hawks. I surely feel badly for you. To have to deal with CJ every week in the locker room can't be fun. Poor Poor Hawks. Anyways, I'm bringing my AAAAAAA+ game tomorrow night. I'm going to turn McDermott & Shehan so fast that they will become nautious and vomit on each other. Then I'm going to take the puck and make my daddy Pete look foolish as he flops around like a spastic trout on CJ's ridlin! Then I'm going to clip CJ in the face, stand over him and mumble something mean about revenge. Then I'm going to go into the locker room after the first period and rest up for our next game as we will be up 102 - 0. Sorry ladies.
Response:

You will feel bad

BY: chrisj
Mar 1st, 2005 @ 12:00AM


You can get a 102 goals on pete tonight and we will still win the game...you may spin mc d but not ed...have fun hanging with your daddy..I hope you do so
Response:

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 2nd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Kelly, you and the Rangers definitely wooped our ass last night. However, there is still some blood to be spilled on your account. Next week will be Rangers\Hawks round three. Without a doubt, you will see a different Hawks squad. We're playing for pride, and hopefully you guys won't clam up with a little body-contact like you did last night. Looks like the turtle went back into his shell. Time for a ass whoopin! NUFF SAID
Response:

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 3rd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


First of all, congratulations Pete. I am also having a baby in July. I'm sure SHE'LL be leaving Park in the dust.
Response:

Park has company with DADDY

BY: paldrich
Mar 3rd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Kelly Park is not the only one to call me daddy now. My wife and I had a baby boy tuesday night. Nine pounds 14 ounces, and he came out wearing skates. I think he will be shutting Park down in a couple years
Response:

Parks stats

BY: paldrich
Mar 3rd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Score on me? Jesus Park, where you been? I haven't played for the Hawks since before thanksgiving. No wonder your stats are so high, you cant remember one game to the next. Stop smoking the crack son, that stuff will kill ya!
Response:

Face Mask needed for Bruins Game

BY: Tao Smith
Mar 4th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Does anyone have a half shield that I can borrow for tomorrow night's game? I understand that we can't wear cages against the Bruins Alumni.
Response:

Congrats guys

BY: kpark
Mar 4th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


That is awesome guys. Hopefully those kids don't look ANYTHING like you two or else they are in store for a rough childhood, almost as bad as having a girls name and moving around alot as a kid. Kids can be so mean(sniff, sniff) Anyways, if I continue playing like I have been, I could be shut down and left in the dust by Chris Johnson every night! And that would suck. Additionally, how many times can I get hit in the face with his stick before I start swinging at him. Chris you are lucky I like you! I'm starting to think it's personal!
Response:

what do you think?

BY: tgove
Mar 5th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


so the game is in the books! what a turn out by fans ah! what are your thoughts on the incident ? that oh by the way made history as it has never happened before in a bruins EXHIBITION game. my thought is that you should be carful who you pick your fights with. not a guy who had 150+ penalty mins in more then two or three seasons and most of those were for kicking the bejesus out of the other guy. I would also probably be sore enough to miss the last week of the season.
Response:

Get your facts straight!

BY: balletprof
Mar 7th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Chris, you are going to preach about someone getting their facts straight, why don't you start with yourself. If you want to talk shit about hockey on this forum, that is one thing, you go ahead, but you stay the fuck out of someone's personal life, do you understand me? The reasons behind why my husband and I made the choice not to place an ad in the program for the Bruins game is certainly not for you to judge. For your information we decided not to spend the extra money on an ad due to the fact that we have to save money for surgery that our daughter requires. If that is something that you feel like belittling, go ahead, show us what kind of big man you really are. You get your facts straight before you get personal asshole! Before you try, NO, I do not accept your apology, no one fucks with my family; you have gone too far.

-Alanna McDermott
Response:

Whatever, Johnson.

BY: hkydoc
Mar 7th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


You are entitled to your opinion, and I am entitled to mine. I'll continute to write my views and opinions in the write-ups as I have always done, and in the Forum. I encourage you to do the same. I can tolerate your opinions even though they may be different than mine, but have lost respect for you because of your behavior on the ice, lack of apology, and attempts to rationalize your poor decision to cheap shot someone in a charity game. Like I said before, you won't be representing the UVHL for anything ever again. I spoke to alot of people after the game and you are the only one who seems to think it was okay to do what you did. Do you mean to think that LB alone wanted to send you a little message to tone it down? It was a consensus of the Bruins bench that sent him over to you. I just hope you learn from you mistake instead of being so bloody indignant. With respect to my business, it is just that, so leave it alone - I won't go sticking my nose into yours and expect the same courtesy. And by the way, you did turtle.
Response:

right is right!! wrong is wrong!!

BY: tgove
Mar 7th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Kelly: you were mild with your comments to that one, seeing your dad (one of Bostons greatest hockey players ever to grace the black & gold) recieve a check (not a hard one but still a check),& bob sweeney get the next one. I would have thought you would have tapped "CJ" Personally. I should write a letter of thanks to chris for what he did. I have laughed about it often over the remainder of the week-end, Because of what you did chris I am able to tell everyone that " I broke up a lyndon Byers fight", when actually Deep Inside I know that if he (LB) had wanted to get away from me or through me, that he would have had no problem,how ever he chose the correct route which he has done so many times before and listened to the ref,had he not like kelly said it would have been an emerg.room trip. Have you ever seen any of his fights in your life? IF NOT Are you from another planet? OH & by the way, No I'm not your white knight, I am a referee who does his job always whether I like the player or not. you embarassed yourself/the league and all of your teammates (or friends), SORRY wont make it go away for awhile, YES it will be forgotten, (Hopefully). But now calling names (@shawn) wont help it go away anytime soon, your not a kid anymore, not going to be a pro hockey player (thats a fact) we dont even know,Did you ever play orginized hockey anywhere? If so I doubt they tolerated that sort of BS. we all work regular jobs somewhere & just play or ref. Hockey for the love of the game. And thats about it. So as you read this and think about your memories of saturday with the BOSTON BRUINS "SMARTIN UP"/ "GROW UP" cause hockey is a team sport and cant be played alone AND because of this ref you are still able to talk and tell people that you were on the ice against the retired bruins and almost lost your life, cause we all know you lost your senses!!
Response:

my world aint perfect

BY: chrisj
Mar 7th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


You are right Park and I respect your opinion here and no I don't think I didn't do anything wrong but I didn't feel like it was a tap and I took offense to the 3rd pounding he gave me in that one shift. I also got some very nice and helpfull advice from your dad so I am inclined to agree with you again. My point is drop it....move on and try not to point fingers,and support your teammates.
Response:

OUCH!

BY: kpark
Mar 7th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


If we are picking on people, McD, that was weak. Secondly, Chris I agree with McDermott on this one and let you know the other night. I was on the ice, right behind you when I saw LB tap you on the helmet with his stick. It wasn't even hard, it was to say, DUDE, what the hell are you thinking flying in here throwing elbows. It was not even hard. You also have to remember that these guys are out for to help out charities, as embassadors of the game and just for shits and giggles and don't need assholes llike you bombing around 200 mph and out of control. Thridly, turtle, you should be counting your lucky stars that you aren't in the hospital right now. You don't go around trying to measure up to guys like that and it doesn't make you a pussy to back down and say, why the hell am I even thinking about throwing a punch at this guy. Everyone I talked to agreed that you were out of control, and if not, please let me know. But it's done and over with and the Rangers are AGAIN going to spank the shit out of you Blackhawks. Oh and Chris, if you REALLY think that you didn't do anything wrong, you may want to take a step outside of that little perfect world that you have built up inside your head and look at things a bit more objectively.
Response:

oh by the way

BY: chrisj
Mar 7th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Don't forget to thank McDermott for being to cheap to take out an ad in the program...THAT is an embarrassment.
Response:

your write up is an embarrasment

BY: chrisj
Mar 7th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


First of all a write up shouldn't be a forum for your personal opinion, secondly it wasn't a tap on the helmet it was a whack and if you want to live your life letting goons like LB slap you in the head than go ahead, it only demonstrates what a pussy you are. Thirdly after being thrown to the ice and 4 people in the mix it was easier to stay where I was than add to the fire so if you call it turtling than that is what it was. also if you do write-ups make sure your information is correct. Lastly I was even outclassed at the dinner when LB showed up wearing his best cowboy hat and dress Harley T-shirt. To sum your opinions are always clouded, not everyone who was there agrees with you, get your facts straight and learn to keep your mouth shut. I had no intention of addressing this because it was discussed at length the other night but since you feel it necessary to drag it over the coals then I will say my peace. Lastly Thanx to Gove, since Pete is Parks Daddy, that would make you my white knight.
Response:

It was bullshit!

BY: hkydoc
Mar 7th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I thought it was embarassing for the league and I'm still pissed off about it. He won't be representing the league ever again. Did you read my write-up?
Response:

Thank you JT, Hadley, Bruins Alumni

BY: kpark
Mar 8th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I don't know about the rest of you, but I had a BLAST the other night for the Bruins Alumni Game and I wanted to thank John Turner, Greg Hadley and All of the Bruins Alumni for coming. I would like to put in a request to have the Bruins bring less guys and less talented guys next year because losing 12-4 didn't feel to good. But thanks guys, for putting so much effort into it. If you didn't notice how much effort went into ti, open your eyes and take a look, Turner was so stressed out he pulled out half of his hair in a fit of rage and it made Hadley Grey, oh, no wait, he's 65 so that is probably natural. Thanks guys
Response:

JT and HADS deserve the credit.

BY: hkydoc
Mar 8th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


JT and Hads were the ones who took the initialtve and took charge of this event, not me. They deserve all the credit for the Bruins Alumni game, as does Dan French, the Union Arena manager.
Response:

Awsom pics

BY: tgove
Mar 8th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Kelly the picture of your dad in todays valley news is awsome. I'm sure you have alot of pictures of him playing but what a treat this one has to be,he still looks as if he were playing against a contender,ya think? You can get a copy of the pic if you go to the valley news and fill out a form,its not too bad$$$ WHAT A MEMORY!! Thanks JT,HADLEY & SHAWN for making this happen,
Response:

CJ crossed the line

BY: paldrich
Mar 8th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Kudos to Alanna for verbally dropping the gloves on Johnson. Ya went to far Chris. Trading shots about our games on here is one thing, but whether or not Shawn's business chooses to buy and ad is none of your, or anyone else's business for that matter. Shawn, JT and others did alot just to make that game happen. How about a THANK YOU for the work that was done to pull it off?

As for the on ice antics, I wasn't there to see it, but sounds like you got what you needed.
Response:

Candy Asses

BY: kpark
Mar 9th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


To those of you who didn't show up last night because of a little snow, you are a bunch of candy asses! I mean Come ON. It was the last freakin game of the season! Whoever didn't stay to watch the final championship game, Tuck scored with .3 secons left to win it 4-3 on a goal by Stu Logan who was playing forward. That's a slap in the face to the Bruins!
Response:

Thanks

BY: dfitts
Mar 9th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I agree with Kelly for once, their is a first. I really appreciate the work JT and Hadley did setting up the whole weekend. It will go down as one of the best hockey memories that I have had. I had so much fun that I am now sick and have been out of work for the last two days.
Response:

Whos in charge????

BY: sfras
Mar 14th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


What no write up on the final games of the season? What kind of league is this, yeah the weather was bad but there should still be a write-up.

It was a good season, well except for having Park around. Anyway see you all next year.
Response:

I agree

BY: kpark
Mar 15th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Blame McD for slackin' on the write-ups! I do agree that it was a great season, but I do appologize for anyone who had to deal with me on a weekly basis, specifically the Rangers. Anyways, Mud League started last night with the UVHL Leafs whoopin' up on the Young Guns something like 17-1. And then I played for the UVHL Bruins where Murph Decided it was important to try and end my season by kicking my feet out from under me, but it only ended up in an upper sprain in my ankle and I should be back on the ice in two weeks. See you ladies then.
Response:

Boo Hoo

BY: kpark
Mar 16th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Listen, Captain Glove, a sprained ankle is a better excuse than what you used, "Oh, my wife popped out a little Pete, and now I can never play again!" Go to the store, get some tissues, wipe your vag and get back on the ice, PETEY!!!!
Response:

Park is a PUSSY

BY: paldrich
Mar 16th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


you call yourself a hockey player? Just rub some spit on it and get your candy ass back out on the ice. Man you are such a pussy. Ankle-shmankle you have one on the other leg don't you?
Response:

Thoughts on Next Season

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 17th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


First of all, I would like to thank Shawn and JT for a great experience in my first UVHL season. The competition was definitely better than I expected. I hope to see most of you next year. I will be returning with McD to the Rangers, So look fr the Rangers in the final . Also, we all know how electrifying Sinclair was this year, But I did score the second most goals, Too Bad Kelly!!! Maybe, with me on your line next season you 'll get a few more. PEACE, MARSHY!
Response:

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 17th, 2005 @ 12:00AM



Response:

I certainly hope so

BY: kpark
Mar 18th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Well, Mr. Marsh, I should have a few more goals as I have finally dtiched that piece of TRASH stick that Fatley, I mean Hedley had gotten from Norto. I am already in withdrawal about the UVHL being over. To next season when the Rangers beat up on all!!!!! Oh, did Hadley blow that final game or what!?!?!?!?
Response:

I NEED HOCKEY

BY: kpark
May 3rd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Hello all, I need some summer hockey to keep me sane. Anyone have any place to play? I NEED IT!
Response:

Keep the skirt on

BY: paldrich
May 31st, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Park, stay at home and keep using that ankle excuse...
Response:

Sumer League in Rutland

BY: kpark
Jun 8th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Hey, for all that want to play, There is a league starting on July 1st at the Rutland Regional Feild House. It's only $125. Just click HERE and download the Registration Form. Hope to see you all and if anyone wants to carpool, I am more than WILLING to split gas and a 6 pack on the ride home!
Response:

John Turner

BY: kpark
Sep 7th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Hey, I found some information on JT's Professional Hockey career. Check it out!!!! His Goals Against was AMAZING!!!!!! http://www.hockeydb.com/ihdb/stats/pdisplay.php3?pid=55531
Response:

Let s go Rangers!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 21st, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Hopefully everyone will get their money in to Tao ASAP, MARSHY!
Response:

Can t wait to tear up this league

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 21st, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Park, you and I had better connect this year. If we play on the same line, there's no reason we can t score a shit load of points. Besides, JT's gonna need all the help we can give him until he burns off that sympathy fat. Yes I can say that because I too had my first child this summer. Her name is Emma, and she can already outskate me! HA HA Anyhoo, You will learn soon what that's like. GO RANGERS!
Response:

Hell yeah

BY: kpark
Sep 22nd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


But, first and foremost, we are now the Nordiques. GO NORDIQUES. I also plan on scoring about 40 goals against that chubby tank, Hadley. So stick with me and you'll clean up on the points. Oh Pelletier will never repeat the numbers he had last year. Plus he weighs 350 lbs now.
Response:

BY: Tao Smith
Sep 23rd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Oh my God, Turner! You're a sieve! Maybe we should recruit Weglars to be the Nordiques goal tender?
Response:

peter piper park punk

BY: dcoff13
Sep 29th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


haha punk Season 3 to begin next week, how many points are you posting pre-UVHL start? Marsh is a freakin' dad, I guess anything can happen... Marsh you phreakity phreak, how about shootin' this year, at the net. go Silver, I mean go Rangers, I mean go whatever we are now. By the way my photo setting is dope...
Response:

I apologize

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 2nd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Kelly, I want take this time to recognize that You only played 1 more game than I last year and your ppg was higher than mine. Now that we've got that cleared up, You and I will be expected to play well together. I will have no problem putting the puck in the net, just pass the fuckin' biscuit!
Response:

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 2nd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


First of all Park, The ONLY reason you beat me in the points last season is because you played 80 games. And I may have gained some sympathy pregnancy pounds, but you'll find out what that's all aboot! Yah ABOOT! Let's just get down to biznazz. Coffey, if you're gonna play on our line, I'm gonna need some serious help getting Park up to speed on the intensity level. Yes kelly, what I lack in speed, I make up for with intensity. Hopefully when I'm yelling at you to pass the puck, you don'tpiss your pants and cry to Tony. Remember, we're on the same team. Let's kick some serious ass Nordiques, See ya on the Ice! MARSHY!
Response:

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 2nd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


First of all Park, The ONLY reason you beat me in the points last season is because you played 80 games. And I may have gained some sympathy pregnancy pounds, but you'll find out what that's all aboot! Yah ABOOT! Let's just get down to biznazz. Coffey, if you're gonna play on our line, I'm gonna need some serious help getting Park up to speed on the intensity level. Yes kelly, what I lack in speed, I make up for with intensity. Hopefully when I'm yelling at you to pass the puck, you don'tpiss your pants and cry to Tony. Remember, we're on the same team. Let's kick some serious ass Nordiques, See ya on the Ice!
Response:

Coffey!!

BY: kpark
Oct 2nd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I think I'll start myself out with 25 points just because I'm awesome. Unfortunately only the games I play for MY team this year count towards my point total. So I can't play 85 games this year and win the scoring title. Yeah, Marshy is looking a bit out of shape! And still loves to take slap shots from behind the net. Oh well, he's a lost cause! Just kidding Marshy. Oh, Pelletier looks like a SNOWMAN! He has a head like a pumpkin. GO NORDIQUES!!!!
Response:

Yes Marshy

BY: kpark
Oct 3rd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Consider it done Marshy! Consider it done. Nordiques are taking home the cup this year. So don't get your hopes up if your playing on another team. Well that is if Turner doesn't go down for the season with a labia pull.
Response:

Bentley's or On The Green?

BY: kpark
Oct 4th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Hey guys, where shall we go tomorrow night after the game? I am leaning towards Off the Green, because they have the big plasma screens and we can watch both the Red Sox & Bruins after the game. Any thoughts?
Response:

Dear Petey Boy Aldrich

BY: kpark
Oct 4th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


First and foremost.....PETEY.....I owned you last year. The only time I didn't light you up was out of pity! Secondly, CAPTAIN B LEAGUER, nobody even picked up your contract for the 2005-2006 season, so you were sent down to the MINORS. Some have said that I had some influence because I had trouble scoring your lame fat ass, but those rumors are all ridiculous and false! COMPLETELY FALSE, NO TRUTH to those rumors. PROVE IT!!! YOU CAN'T PROVE IT PETEY!!!! I'm innocent....ok, I do have nightmares of that big brick wall, and pulled some strings to get you sent down to the minors. There, the truth is out! WHEW, I feel like a new man. Oh, you may get the call up when Turner goes down with a pulled left pinky ligament. So get your ass in shape.
Response:

Park will flounder in 05-06

BY: paldrich
Oct 4th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Park, you are going to be snake bit this season. Every time you try to shoot you will just see my BRICK WALL in front of you and then you will fan on the puck. Its a mental game...I own you.
Response:

MISSING STICK

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 8th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Someone left the game last witn my new Easton stick. It is green, with an orange blade. Someone definitely has taken it by mistake. I cannot afford to replace it, Please bring it to the game on Tuesday. Thanks, MARSHY
Response:

Hell no

BY: kpark
Oct 9th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


How could I? You can't find good consistent hockey within 100 miles! It sucks. Give me a couple of weeks. I'm cutting back my drinking from 50 beers a week to 45, which I think will make a huge difference. I also stopped eating a whole pizza and just 7 slices at one sitting. I was thinking of doubling it, just to see if I could look like pelletier and not have my heart explode after 3 strides on the ice.
Response:

Were you ready for Opening Night?

BY: hkydoc
Oct 9th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Be honest. How many of you were ready to play on Oct 5th? I sure saw a hell of a lot of sucking wind and sloppy play on Opening Night. Ever hear of pre-conditioning you lazy, injury-prone bastards?
Response:

Off The Green

BY: hkydoc
Oct 9th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Bentley's screwed us on Wed Oct 5th! I pre-ordered two chicken caesars for myself and my wife for 11:05 PM and Bentley's CLOSED on us! I was getting ready to leave the rink at 10:55 PM and Alanna shows up to tell me that she went to Bentley's and it was closed. Fuck Bentley's! My allegiances have changed! However, Park, you need to stop being a pussy because when I showed up at Off The Green shortly after 11:00 PM you were nowhere to be found, and all the game sheets were still in my briefcase and not in your and JT's possession. I'll see you there post-game next week, no excuses or you'll be buying the beer!
Response:

I'm signing checks my body can't cash!

BY: jt
Oct 10th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


6 months off and no conditioning hurts. I've got ice bags lined up, a case of Bengay and a heating pad at work. I had so much fun and there were some early positives. Much to my surprise, I could still play. Let's take it to the Bruins and get back to 500 tomorrow night. I am ready to shut down Pelletier, Sinclair, Homeschool etc. See If you (Kelly, Marshy) can light up Hadley. Hey, where was superstar Dave Willis in game one?
Response:

a.m. games!!??

BY: scasnh
Oct 10th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Dear comishes, although I agree with the am schedule this week, because it leaves much more time in the day for drinking, I'm not sure it is a good idea. Most of my Leafs squad is just getting home from the bar and might not be in top form at 6:40 am. Some of our skilled guys even had trouble making it out for a 9:30 evening game! I guess promises of morning beers might bolster our line up, so I vote that we give it a try. GO LEAFS!!

Response:

I like your predictions

BY: jt
Oct 13th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I think if the Kings score early that it will be a rout. It will most likely end much like you suggest or higher I say 10-6 Kings.
Nordiques over leafs 4-2
The Avalanche are much improved, though I am not sure that they can score 8. Without Jamie James it will be Tuck with the 8-4 win. What do you think?
Response:

Great Games Next Week

BY: kpark
Oct 13th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Hey guys, check out the 3 games for October 18th, the two 2-0 teams face off (Storm Kings & Bruins), the two 1-1 teams(Avalanche & Tuck) and the two basement dwellers (0-2, Nords & Leafs). Very interesting. Who will be the last team without a point? The Leafs or Nordiques? Unless it goes to a shootout, I'm going to say the Leafs, although my Nordiques have absolutely sucked so far, top to bottom. My predictions:

Storm Kings over Bruins 8-5
Nordiques over Leafs 5-3
Tuck over Avalanche 8-6. What are your thoughts?
Response:

Park speaks out

BY: dcoff13
Oct 14th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


just post some damn points Park

Response:

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 15th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


My predictions are as follows;
Bruins 7 Storm Kings 5
Nords 6 Leafs 4, My first points of the season included.
Tuck 10 Avs 4.
Let's really try hard out there guys, win the battles in the corner, make good passes, shoot the puck! My conditioning is coming along, and with another skate on Mon. night, I'm coming ready to play! Go Nords!
Response:

"Beers for Goals"-a deeper look

BY: scasnh
Oct 17th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


It is based on the very popular and charitable U.S. Marine concept of "Toys for Tots" (well, not really, just the name). Basically, if you score you get a free beer. That idea is not ground breaking, I know, so we've added some more incentives to make it more of a total team concept. If you get an assist you get an 8oz beer (aka a pony), for every penalty you get a shot of Wild Turkey, and of course for every save Kenny (aka "Thorny"--if you've seen Supertroopers the resemblance is almost uncanny!) gets a sip off a Bartles and James wine cooler (he request's the Summer Berry flavor-- I think it's an age thing!). The best part of the whole thing is that because our offensive output has been in a "state of emergency" all beer/booze/wine cooler purchases are officially tax deductible per the US government Disaster Act of 1913! After all that, my prediction is -- Leafs 5 Nodicks 4. None of the other games matter much, and they will fail to rival the emotion and intensity of the "Battle of the Basement"! See you guys out there!
Response:

HOLY CRAP - BEERS FOR GOALS!!!

BY: kpark
Oct 17th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Could you please give me some more details on this "Beers for Goals" promotion on the Leafs? I may be willing to switch teams for a couple of free beers!!! Just kidding.....but seriously, I want details. Marshy, you and I had both better get our sticks out of our asses and pot a couple of goals against the Leafs! The battle of the Basement, that's the motto for our game!
Response:

in defence of the leafs

BY: scasnh
Oct 17th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


It looks to be a break out week for the Leafs! Team spirit is very high, and after implementation of the beers for goals incentive, we might even field a full squad for "the battle of the basement"
Response:

BY: scasnh
Oct 17th, 2005 @ 12:00AM



Response:

IBEX Discount

BY: kpark
Oct 18th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Hey guys, I work for IBEX Outdoor Clothing, http://www.ibexwear.com, and I was thinking that I could get everyone in the league a one time discount, but we would need to put in just one big order. So if anyone is interested, let me. I will find out what the discount will be and let know you. Just a little bit about IBEX though, pretty much everything we make is made out of Wool, which is 100 times better than that shitty synthetics. It is anti-microbial so bacteria won't grow on it and stink. Wool also has temperature regulation which is great for baselayers where it will warm you up if you are cool and breathes to cool you down if you are warm. The stuff is high quality and comes with a decent price tag, so I would recommend taking advantage of the discount. I use the baselayers under my hockey equipment which absolutely rocks. It works in both a warm rink like Woodstock or a FRIDGID one like Campion. If you have any questions, I can bring in a catalog, or just grab me, I'm usually wearing most of the stuff. Oh, if you don't know who I am, my name is Kelly Park and I play for the Nordiques. Additionally, we are going to light up the Maple Leafs tonight. Feel free to email me at kpark@ibexwear.com. Thanks, Kelly
Response:

Park, We need a little wake up in the stats dept.

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 30th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Kelly, what the fuck is going on? You and I, aside from Sinclair led the league in points last year. Yes you had more points, however I had more goals. This is embarrasing for me, mostly because I played for the shit-Hawks and still managed 2-3 points per game. Not every game, but usually. I think what we need is a real good blow-out of the Hopeless Avalanche. Im guessing 10-2 . You and I getting our first goals of the season. Seriously, for the sake of our competitive nature play with some intensity. Forget joking around with the refs, or telling hadley how much he sucks, or trash - talking just about anyone. I know if you focus on pounding the shit out of Johnson's team, we'll come out smelling like roses. Oh yeah baby! I own the center ice this week when I'm out there, So whoever wants to can take notice. Canadian as Pea Soup, MARSHY!!!
Response:

I have no idea what is going on.

BY: kpark
Oct 31st, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I will be the first to admit it. I suck. I can't even get my head out of my ass to find someone to pass the damn puck to. I am useless, I think I may just retire and focus on my unborn child. YEAH RIGHT!!! Ok, I am pissed, this is embarassing for me, I am going to go home tonight and do some dry land training and puck handling drills in my dirt driveway. Johnson is a little midget and I plan on turning him inside out tomorrow night! Go Nordiques.
Response:

To Play or Not to Play???

BY: tgove
Nov 1st, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Or was the game just simply ruined. OH YES it is a UVHL rule!! BUT I along with a few others believe that playing the game is more important then who plays in the game or stats, wins loses and goals. Now Doug could use the excuse that the captain WHICH BY THE WAY HE CAN NOT BE A CAPTAIN was not on the ice at the start because he forgot his skates. But come on maybe everyone is trying to get to that next level. I mean realy lets look at this thruthfully this is as high as it gets. Now lets act like grown ups and make it competetive BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY LETS MAKE IT FUN. SORRY HADLEY YOU CAN NOT BE CAPTAIN!!! USA RULE'S
Response:

Mercy Rule!!!!

BY: bad call
Nov 2nd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Why is this the only USA Adult Hockey league in North America to not have the Mercy Rule in effect?
Response:

response

BY: tgove
Nov 2nd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


It becomes partially my responsibility because that was what was asked of me at the begininning of the uvhl. Hadley was told that the player issue would be adressed at the end of the period, because it needed clarification that is all. Greg is only ignored when he approaches the way he does sometimes, you always get proper answrers when you approach it right. I am in no way saying he does this always but he does do it. administative problems are not the refs problem unless it is a person not listed on the game sheet, in that instance all players were listed. I doubt you will be on the b-team but if you are I will see you there as we ref those games also, and I see one of there captains there each week --I think he is scouting...
Response:

BY: tonyd
Nov 3rd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Mr Gove, I new you'de get me after I opened my pie hole to the Commish in that email. Good call though, I didn't even have to wait for your signal before I headed to the box. Sometimes I'm such an ass, SO MUCH SHAME.
Response:

BY: tonyd
Nov 3rd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


what is the official mercy rule?
Response:

oh no!!

BY: tgove
Nov 3rd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


That is not true, Juniors play USA rules and it would be up to them to invoke such a rule! I do agree that we should do something along that line but what is fair??
Response:

non written

BY: tgove
Nov 5th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


there is no official mercy rule, however the most used one around is 6 goal's anytime during the third period and the clock does not go back to stop time after that. How ever in tourneys they dont use mercy rules because goals count for tie breakers. should we do that, Maybe the team getting there ass whipped should be the one to agree to it.
Response:

League reviewing Mercy!!

BY: jt
Nov 5th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


The only reason we didn't have a mercy rule to date, is that we wanted each player to get the icetime they pay for. There has been more than one concern about blowouts, they also create frustrated players and more infractions/penalties. Shawn and I are addressing this issue.

Thanks,
-JT
Response:

BY: bad call
Nov 6th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


most leagues usually run it somewhere between an 8-10 goal differential and stop running it if the margin gets back to 4-5 goals

Response:

All for it

BY: kpark
Nov 6th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I would have to agree on instilling a mercy rule. I know for a fact that I can't stand getting blown out and it definitely leads to bad things. Maybe bump it up from 6 goals to 7 and only in the 3rd period. Although, you will have to hear Hadley bitch about the 10 goal comeback that his team was about to go on!!!! Oh by the way, Hadley sucks dick for Beer money!!!!! Sincerely, Kelly Andrew Park

P.S. - If Pelletier gets any fatter, you guys are gonna need to have him sit in the penalty box between shifts!
- P.P.S Des Champs couldn't score on a two dime hooker.
P.P.P.S - Home Fry is an embarassment to the league.
Response:

Not gonna work.

BY: kpark
Nov 7th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


First and foremost, I don't really think there would be enough issues for a vote-in commissioner to make decisions on each year. There only seems to be a few major issues here which are the Storm Kings Roster, Subs & Mercy rules. I personally think that both Commissioners are doing a great job. This is a learning experience and each year the league is getting better & better. This doesn't have to be such a difficult job, but there is always going to be someone bitching about something. You can't appease everyone's wishes. For that matter, I want strippers in my locker room after games, but I don't think I'm going to get that.. By the way, who the hell is "d man"? In theory this may be a good idea, but all that does is get people pissed off and complaining about someone new each year, when Shawn is willing to take the punishment year after year.
Response:

NEW COMMISIONER

BY: d man
Nov 7th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


With all the problems and lack of trust everyone seems to have this year with the sixth team. Why don't we have a new rule and have NEW commisioner ever year. SHawn since you are running this as a business and it is a business you maintian a role as acting president a title much more worthy and we the players vote every year for the commisioners position. What are your thoughts players.
Response:

BY: tonyd
Nov 7th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Sounds good if we can specify that beer is permitted on the losing teams bench anytime this rule is implimented.
Response:

Nicely put

BY: kpark
Nov 8th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Tony & Sean, nicely put. I agree with both sides. It definitely sucks playing against the Storm Kings, but they are still fun to play against and fun to watch, and everyone in the league could learn something if they just watched the way they move the puck. But every year there has been that STACKED team, the first year it was the Red Team, they lost one game all season in a shootout until they lost in the finals. TUCK was undefeated last year too. The most important thing that team captains / managers have to remember is that THEY are in charge of building their teams and making sure that they are competitive, not the commissioners. So each offseason the captain has to either trim the fat or eat it the next year. The Storm Kings are beatable, but each team has to realize that the focus isn't on scoring goals against them, it's about playing GREAT defense and smart hockey. My Nordiques are going up against them and that is our plan. I don't know if it will even help, but I am confident that if we play together, we'll make it a good game. Unfortunately, Fitzy is the WORST captain ever. Just kidding Dave. Oh, and I'm still working on the post game strippers, I think I've made some progress.
Response:

thoughts

BY: scasnh
Nov 8th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Players and commishes,I personally think that the league has been a pleasure to play in so far and that comissioners are doing a great job. This is my first year playing in the league and it seems like a class operation for men's league hockey. There were youth leagues that I was in growing up that were less organized, and definately no other men's league around here even compares. Keeping 6 teams worth of testosterone/beer fueled hockey players happy is quite near impossible. Most guys have trouble keeping just their wives happy, never mind all the issues that come along while running a whole league. There are bound to be problems, but why have a new commmishioner who is inexperienced every year try to take care of things that someone already knows how to do, that is called "reinventing the wheel". As far as I can tell the commishes ask for as much feedback as we can give and are pretty receptive to making changes in the name of making a better hockey league. I think honest mature feedback is the only solution to the major issues in this situation. I'm on the Leafs and it has been a bit of a bumpy road so far. Three or four of last years core players are gone and there are a bunch of rookies in our line up and we were there for the major "sub debacle" AND the game that initiated the "mercy rule" talk (a 17-4 pounding by the Storm Kings last week). Despite all this it has still been a blast, nothing that some free wings and some cheap beers won't take care of in a REAL hurry. Putting 6 competative teams together with guys who REGULARLY show up can't be easy in a rural area such as this. I'm sure that if everyone who committed showed up there would be less of a gap in the league standings. So I think it takes a strong commitment on the part of the captains, players, AND league management to make the whole thing work! Just my opinion.

sc
Response:

BY: tonyd
Nov 8th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Is the goal of a "premier" adult hockey league to have the best TEAM or the best COMPETITION in the area? Alot of the issues can be resolved by maintaining teams that are competitive with each other. There is no reason after 5 games to have a 5 and 0 team that has outscored the 4-0-1 team by over 40 goals, how is that "premier" hockey?
If the league reserved the right to trade players (or did it if they already do) to even up teams it would deter anyone from stacking their roster for fear of loosing players down the road. Instead it seems that the league has encouraged, even sponsored a team that is stacked against all of the lowly "other guys" that have paid the bills for the last few years. Short of the Storm Kings regular hammering of opponents we are 2-3 traded players away from evening up the other 5 squads and having a great, great league.
I agree, let shawn continue to take the poundnig as commissioner, besides who else would want that job? Maybe a larger board would work. I have been confused since the get go anyway, is this a business for the founders or is it a league for the players. Nothing wrong with either, but if that was clearer to everyone maybe we wouldn't ask so many stupid questions, just pay, play, and shut up.
Response:

BY: bad call
Nov 8th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Well put! And.... strippers in the lockeroom should be explored a little further...
Response:

Good idea

BY: Tao Smith
Nov 9th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I'm in favor of the mercy rule if we stop the differential at, say, five or six goals. However, I think the clock should continue to be stopped time so that players don't lose out on ice time. Just stop recording the goals after the five or six goal differential.
Response:

Good points!

BY: Tao Smith
Nov 9th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I say, "hats off' to JT and Shawn. It is not easy to make everyone happy and these guys deserve credit for organizing and putting this league together. I've been playing since the first season and have seen the level of play inprove each year. I am in favor of making trades during the season if both captains wish to do so and it is approved by the commissioners; however, we need to keep in mind that winning isn't everything - a lot of us play together because we want to get out and skate with friends each week. That's why Kelly has stayed on our team for so long - he sucks, but, despite his rapid fire mouth, I guess we like him. In the future, captains need to be organized to recruit for their teams and get players on the roster early on. What we should institute is a rule that gives each team a draft position as new players come into the league. If a captain recruits a player/friend directly, then that player should go directly to his team. However, as independent players sign up through the website, there should be a system for drafting those individuals. The team in last place, or in last place from the previous year, should get first pick, then go to the team with the second worst record and so on. We should have an open skate for new players at the beginning of the year with all the captains in attendance. Then, they can choose in order of team ranking - last to first. There needs to be a system, however, so that we can make fair additions during the season and so that each team knows its order for adding new players.
Response:

Bring it on, D-man.

BY: hkydoc
Nov 11th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Listen D-man, this is Shawn McDermott, the co-commish, and I'm not afraid to use my name in this reply, so if you think you can do a better job than JT and I do, then bring it on, pussy. Here is our offer: you can be a tuition player for the year and you have to complete all the game sheets, bring pucks every night, make sure that everyone is registered with the league and with USA Hockey, do the stats and write-ups each week, listen to the handful of assholes bitch at you week after week, make sure there are refs, write out their checks, make sure there is a scorekeeper, write out his check, assign players to incomplete rosters, bring extra jerseys and make sure duplicate numbers aren't used, bring the med kit, help injured players, sit through each and every UVHL game, ensure that we even have a fucking league each year, make sure we get enough to cover overhead, deal with Frenchy and the rink contract, clean up when the night is over, go to the bar late, get bitched at at the bar again, get home late and get up early the next morning. This way JT and I can just show up to the rink and play some fuckin' hockey in a great league and it will be well worth the $421.00 we won't get from you. How does that sound, asshole? Do we have a deal starting 06-07?
Response:

You know what, She's right!!!!

BY: kpark
Nov 11th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


How about everyone stops bitching an moaning and starts focusing on the great things about the league! For example, the level of play, having 2 refs, a score keeper, stopped time, overtime shootouts, at a great rink, and of course the website. If you also think that Shawn & JT are in this for only the money you couldn't be further from the truth. I know for a fact that both of them haven't made a dime. Especially since they pay me each year to maintain & improve the website. I for one am having a great time. Just look at the poll to see that 90% of the players think the league is "AWESOME" or "great", so if you are not one of those poeple, maybe it's not the league you are unhappy with, maybe it's yourself. Because you are a whinny little bitch who has nothing better to do thank to focus on the negative stuff. The Storm Kings aren't THAT good, the Nordiques proved that by playing smart hockey. If you are unhappy go play in the "B" league. Love Kelly
Response:

Quit your bitchin!

BY: balletprof
Nov 11th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


To all the ungrateful UVHLers out there (and you know who you are), quit your bitchin! You are worse than a bunch of chicks. Why the hell can't you just shut your pie holes and play some hockey, that is what you are there for isn't it?

You bitch and moan about the commisioners and the horrible job they are doing instead of thanking them for all their hard work and for allowing you to have a men's league in the first place. Until they had the balls to start a league the best you had was pick-up and the mud league and I have a hard time believing that you were happier then.

You have no idea how many long hours Shawn & JT have put into this league, not to mention their own money they poured into the league to get it rolling. You assholes that bitch about money, how dare you. The second this league actually makes a profit, I will let you know. JT and Shawn were just lucky enough this year to recoup their inital investments. So yes, this is a business, but if I were working for a business as hard as they do I would have quit a long time ago, since I wouldn't have been paid in three years. So what do they get out of it? Good question. They get to play hockey with a bunch of good guys for the love of the game, all the while taking shit from the few bad seeds. To the grateful players out there, thanks for all your support. To the ungrateful ones, get a life!


Response:

You go girl!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 12th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I am in agreement with Mrs. McD on this one. Be glad there's a league in this area!. If there was no hockey when I moved here, I would have turned tail and headed back to Canada!. So for all you whiners, Shut your fuckin hole eh!
Response:

I agree

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 12th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


I think Mc D and JT are doing a fantastic job. When I came here from Ontario, I was surprised at the togetherness of the league. I am very happy with the organization and competitiveness. I honestly think the fee is a little steep,(it costs $250 in Ontario), But there's a rink on every corner. Beside Tim Horton's!.
Response:

One more thing...

BY: Tao Smith
Nov 14th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Just a piece of advice to the commish: I enjoy reading the sparring that goes on back and forth as much as anyone else; however, if you want to encourage people to voice their opinions on the forum (as I'm assuming it is intended) you might want to back off on the "blasting" of the critics. Just let them say their piece, and stay the hell out of it. They'll get tired of listening to themselves after a while. Of course, in the meantime, it does make for good reading...
Response:

Send the Dark Canuck home!

BY: Tao Smith
Nov 14th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Wait, did anyone read what Marshy wrote above? All we have to do to send his ass back to Canada is get rid of the league! Small price to pay, I say! Just kidding, Marshy! We all love you, especially if you light it up each night like you did last week....
Response:

Kingers ahead 2-0 over All Stars

BY: kpark
Nov 30th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


So what do you guys think. We are kicking your asses 2-0 in the Storm Kings vs. The World 5 game series. I think first and foremost you have to get that good McDermott off your team, he's dragging you down with his cheap play. Additionally, Marshy looks like a big flaming bag of steaming corn filled shit. Just kidding, Marshy. You only looked like a little flaming bag of steaming corn filled shit, and McDermott, you aren't dragging the team down, it's more like at a steep angle.
Response:

Park, you knew this was comin'!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 1st, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Kelly, what's with the cheap shot? You are primarily a Nordique, not a storm kiing. I'd like to see you play on our team, and I'll play for the Kingers. I'm thinkin4-5 goals easy! I know you don't mean I'm slow, because then we'd have to race. If it's on, ITS ON BITCH, WE RE RACING, IN BETWEEN GAMES ON TUES! BE THERE!
Response:

You're both useless!

BY: Tao Smith
Dec 2nd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Look guys, stop the bickering. You both have shortcomings. I thought that by putting Marshy on my line last week I'd get more points - looks like that fell on its face! And Kelly, you told me to pass more and now I'm seeing the ice and making good passes and for what? So my linemates can miss open netters... Let's just face it - you guys both suck.
Response:

Have you been drinking?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 3rd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Tao, first of all, I think you need to take some much need weight off those Stone Hands. Willis and I might as well have served up the points on a silver platter, but you just couldn't seal the deal. I think I'm gonna request a new third linemate if you don't fly straight! Just kidding Tao. But seriously, If you keep us from scoring, we'el have to re-open contract talks with Blue. NUFF SAID!
Response:

You're my boy BLUE

BY: kpark
Dec 4th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Well, Tao, I think Marshy has a point. Blue would have been more productive than you have been this year. But we do want to keep you around, so we'll keep you on as honorary water bitch. Go get me some water bitch!!!!!
Response:

Stone hands better than no hands at all

BY: Tao Smith
Dec 5th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


You guys are right - I've got hands of lead! God, I suck! Marshy, you would have seen how bad I was last night if you had been there. Speaking of which, you better have a good excuse for not skating. And remeber, I have already used most of the good ones!
Response:

retired "for now"

BY: retired
Dec 8th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


After two and a half enjoyable seasons I have to announce my retirement from the UVHL to move to NH's seacoast.

While I had more penalty minutes than points and most of them were trying to get out of my own way, it truly was a pleasure.

JT & Shawn thanks for a great league, Tao, you always put together a good team, Kelly, thanks for setting me up, and to all the Silver, Rangers, Nords and the entire league thanks for everything.

I'll be waiting to get sized for the ring.

cheers

dyke
Response:

Good Luck Pal!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 9th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Dyke, it's been great playing with you. If I'd known last week, we could have planned some kind of going away bash. Good luck with everything, and take care of the wife and kid! We'll miss ya, MARSHY!!!!!
Response:

Finally gave us a good game.

BY: kpark
Dec 9th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Wow about time you guys gave us a good game. If it wasn't for my perfect flutter pass to the one-timing Hunter with 28 seconds remaining to win the game. DAMN I'M GOOD. See I realized that pass needed to have that extra rotation in order to throw Turner off. So we are 3-0. BYATCHES
Response:

So long good friend!!

BY: kpark
Dec 9th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Dyke you will surely be missed. It was great playing with you and good luck with your new move & job. Keep in touch. If you are ever in the area on a Tuesday night, there will always be a spot on our bench for Dyke Shaw. Kelly
Response:

It's been fun, Dyke!

BY: Tao Smith
Dec 14th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Uhhh...Marshy, we sort of did have a party. Sorry we didn't let you know about it. We just thought that Dyke would have wanted it that way. Next time a player retires we'll make sure to let you know. Sorry. (Just kidding, Greg! Gosh, you are so sensitive) By the way, I blame you and Kelly for me not getting any points last night and for me getting in trouble with the Refs. Would you guys get it together?
Response:

Peace out...

BY: dcoff13
Dec 16th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Dyke, It's been real and It's been fun, now get your SH#t and hit the... but seriously, great playin' with you, and who knows, it feels like the Silver/Rangers/Nords (get your head out of your a## McD/JT and pick a frikin' name) will be fielding a Mite team here soon... until then best of luck on the shore, Later Dayz...
Response:

Most DeProved

BY: kpark
Dec 20th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Well, we hare over half way through the season and we should probably put in our two cents about this years most DeProved Player, The league LVP(Least Valuable Player) and the nominees for best player while drunk. My nominations for most DeProved are Pelletier & myself. Although, Robbie is running away with it. Pelletier is also up for best player while drunk, but that might be changed to Biggest Drunk. LVP of the season so far. Hadley for sure. Just because he's Hadley and his ego needs to be kicked in the balls. That's about it.
Response:

Most Improved Player?

BY: sfras
Dec 22nd, 2005 @ 12:00AM


How about a little Congratulations for Tony DeFelice of the Bruins for some Stellar Play in the Month Of December! 10 Goals in 3 games and no Penalty Minutes.

"I think my Drinking Team has a Hockey Problem!" - Tony D.


Keep it up Tony!
Response:

Call it what you will

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 26th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


First of all commish, the "cheap shot " I gave the De Felice, WAS justified. Anyone in this league that slashes me, will be knocked on their ass. I'm not fucking around. And, If you're gonna put someone in an "elite" class for scoring 5 goals, that's just silly. DeFelice is nowhere near Coakley or Sinclair. Yes he deserves a pat on the back for his efforts, so I'll give him that. I'm sure that the Bruins will be met with the same type of play they brought to the table on Tues. See ya next time BEYOTCHES.
Response:

BY: tonyd
Dec 29th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Yeah, midweek works better for me. 1 game 1 pickup sounds perfect.
Tony
Response:

Summer Hockey

BY: kpark
Dec 29th, 2005 @ 12:00AM


Hey guys, can you believe it??!?!?! We are going to have Summer hockey at Union. I think it will be for 6 weeks or so. I am trying to put this together since our commissioners are sick and tired of hearing all of your bitching and moaning, I thought I would take some of the pressure off of them and put it together. Anyways, I am going to sit down with Frenchy, the Rink Manager, next week and talk about Days, Ice Times, etc. Should we do 2 games a week? 1 game and a UVHL Pick Up Game? What night? I'm thinking Thursday night. Let me know all thoughts.
Response:

Very True

BY: kpark
Jan 4th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Tony, you guys were completely right. I had more fun playing in two games last night than most of the season. I think what everyone needs to realize is that nobody is perfect and you guys might miss a call or call one incorrectly, but it isn't personal and it does happen to both teams. Great job last night, that was fun. Although, you should call more penalties on that human keg, Pelletier.
Response:

Thanks for saving the league

BY: tgove
Jan 4th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


This letter does not need a response, meant for info only. Thank you to all of the players that may have relized that mens league can be competetive and fun and also that the refs are also trying to have fun. rules have changed alot since most of you last played and the penalties are never meant as anything personal towards any player. (kelly yes it was your idea to talk to captains and yes theo YO ARE A CAPTAIN, except when you get a penalty) Thanks and heres to a good rest of the season. Thanks Tony (ref)
Response:

Dyke, do my eyes deceive me?!

BY: jt
Jan 5th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Say its not true? I have not checked into the forum as of late and I was sad to read that you have left us. No wonder we have lost two in a row! Dyke good luck down south--JT
Response:

Dyke, do my eyes deceive me?!

BY: jt
Jan 5th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Say its not true? I have not checked into the forum as of late and I was sad to read that you have left us. No wonder we have lost two in a row! Dyke good luck down south--JT
Response:

Ibex Discount

BY: kpark
Jan 5th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Hey guys. I talked to my company and was able to hook up the league with a Promotional Code for a 40% discount off of retail prices. Use the code UVHL06 when you add something to your shopping cart. I would recommend the woolies baselayers, they are awesome and if you didn't know this, wool is anti-microbial which means that bacteria won't grow and attach to the fibers, which is why all of your other equipment stinks. I've been using the same shirt for over a year and it doesn't smell. Our website is www.ibex.com. Please feel free to email me at kpark@ibex.com if you have any questions. Thanks and abuse this. The offer is good through January 15th. Thanks, Kelly
Response:

Hadley's house?

BY: kpark
Jan 10th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


I heard a rumor that Hadley took it in the rear from Robbie Pelletier. Actually I heard the entire Bruins team gets together at Hadley's house each Tuesday night for a circle jerk, and that Seth Warren lathers each guy with vasoline while Dave DesCHAMPS gives a reach around to get started. Then Sinclair shows up drunk and and initiates the pre-game Sword Fights that get them pumped for the game. Don't shoot the messenger, that is just what I heard.
Response:

no responses?

BY: kpark
Jan 11th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Wow, no responses?!?!? You Bruins are a bunch of candy asses following your pillow biting leader Hadley. I WIN, DING!!!! Oh, Pelletier looks like an over stuffed burrito out on the ice.
Response:

Intervention, please?

BY: Tao Smith
Jan 12th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


For Christ's sakes, somebody please take away Kelly's ability to post things on the Forum! This is a family league, we don't need this kind of smut representing our players. Personally, I am worried for Lachlan...
Response:

Glitch?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 20th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


It says in the stats dept. that HADLEY IS 10-3. However, the Bruins only have 9 wins. Hmmmmm. Something's not right. I don't see the Bruins getting their 10th win this week anyway. Remember last game B's? No 5-goal performance this time DeFelice! My prediction, 7-3 Nords.
Response:

disturbing

BY: powd
Jan 24th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


park
We were all quiet after your disturbing write up because we thought maybe you needed some counseling for all your gay thoughts.
we will be without some of our drunken teammates tonight and weglarzs will probably shut you out.
That is if you can tear yourself away from going to see BROKE BACK MOUNTAIN for the eighth time!
Please leave your Elton John CDs and gayness at home tonight.
See you on the ice.
Powers
Response:

the Bruins are sad.

BY: kpark
Jan 24th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


I go out and totally trash the Bruins squad on this forum and you guys don't even have the balls to respond?!?!? I thought you guys would at least have something witty to say, or are you all too exhausted from the "Parties" at Hadley's house. By the way, we are going to light you up tonight, will you please put That Overstuffed Sausage Pelletier on Defense so that I can turn him inside out? I can't believe you guys haven't sent him down to the B League full time. See you ladies tonight.
Response:

Donnie Powers

BY: kpark
Jan 25th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Nicely done Don. Nicely done!!!! About time one of you lame Bruins got off your ass and replied to my trash talking. And for your information, I've only seen BrokeBack Mountain 5 times, not 7. You guys were pathetic last night, but the funny thing is if Hadley had been in net, we would have won 12-2. Good game last night. See you next week.
Response:

BY: tonyd
Jan 26th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


7-3, that was a hell of a game prediction Marshy with the final being 6-2. I was useless this week as were my teamates. Good thing we recruited some talent between the pipes, you guys would have had a field day if weglarz was in net.
Response:

With only three games left who is gonna win it all?

BY: jt
Jan 27th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


The Bruins five game win streak was halted with a loss to the Nordiques. The Avalanche are on the way down and the Leafs are starting to look like contenders. Tuck Help the powerful Storm Kings to only five goals and it was 1-1 after 2 periods. If Gary Hunter got his lazy ass off of the couch they would have won! Can anyone stop the Storm Kings?
Response:

Kelly is a bit disturbed

BY: jt
Jan 27th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Wow! I have been quietly reading the forums for weeks and this one stood out. It is a little scary. Kelly has some issues or the Bruins are up to some strange stuff at Hadley's house. I am glad Don came out to explain that Kelly had watched "Broke Back Mountain" way too many times. I think all of these years showering with men have brought out some latent tendencies. That being said, I am psyched that we lit up the Bruins and Defelice only had one goal. Too bad Hadley was hiding in Vegas. We would have had about ten on him!
Response:

Kelly's skill is long gone

BY: mulletman
Jan 28th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


You are a mess! If you spent more time practicing and less time bitchen and ball bustin then you might actually be decent.
Response:

Nordiques all the way.

BY: kpark
Jan 31st, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Well, I am going to say the Nords will win it all. The Maple leafs just got lucky, Kenny Lallier has been playing with a Horse Shoe surgically implanted into his abdomen. The Avalanche are only as good as C.J. will let them be, which isn't very good, the Bruins are a bunch of bums and even if Sinclair does show up, he's usually drunk, oh and the Storm Kings are only a line deep, Just put somone on Coakley and they are done. Oh, Hadley has the clap, Pelletier looks like a bloated tick, DesChamps is the biggest bitch in the league, oh....cherry pickin' swede, Al Sorrentino is old, Fitzy is the laziest player every, I think Powers may be partially retarded, Sinclair smells like a bourbon factory, Lallier has a porn mustache, Sheehan is slower than me, Nallettte looks like a smurf out there, Fred Redden needs to lay off the juice, McCabe couldn't finish himself off, Jami James has an ego bigger than C.J., DeFellice is a hack, Harrington is a goon, Weglarz needs to trim that horrible goatee...you and Lallier look like a gay porn tag team, Tao Smith couldn't catch herpes, Coakley couldn't pass the salt, Tom Skull should just stay home every week, Weber plays with a short stick, Hughes is always angry for no reason, Marty White is older than dirt, Cashman likes little boys, Frenchy couldn't stop a balloon & I have 3 month old with more talent than Marazzo. That's all I have time for. If I forgot to make fun of you, I am sorry......look for episode 2.
Response:

MULLETMAN

BY: kpark
Jan 31st, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Well, Mulletman. I am well aware of my diminishing hockey skills and like someone who looses one of their five senses, the others grow stronger, my sixth sense which happens to be Trash Talking, is growing stronger and stronger as we speak. My goal for the season is no longer to lead the league in scoring or even play good hockey, I want to make that useless pile of donkey shit, Hadley, cry like a little girl. I think I can do it!
Response:

BY: sfras
Feb 2nd, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Park you just dont know when to shut it do you. You would think after you got whacked around a little you might wise up, but no not you. I guess we will have to try and "learn" you some manners.

As far as you scoring on Hadley, you know what they say about that blind squirrel right?. Well I guess that was your night. By the way what was the final score?

See you soon.
Response:

Shut it.

BY: kpark
Feb 2nd, 2006 @ 12:00AM


First and foremost Tao, I put you right up there with the Bloated Tick as most De-proved player this year. It is embarassing that you still show up on a weekly basis. As for the rest of you, well, you all know that I am the best at life. Did anyone see Hadley play the other night? He was going down faster than his dog does on his peanut buttered up short tool. I mean seriously, all you do is drop down on your knees and hope the puck hits your fat belly, but your shoulder pads are way too big. You look like the kid from A christmas story out there, you can barely move. I also heard that Tuck bit it the other night. Drew Crapser coughed up the puck with 8 seconds left and up by one goal and the Avs tied it up with 2.6 seconds left and won it in over time. Drew, that is horrible, didn't they teach you anything at Dartmouth?!?!?
Response:

I shouldn't dignify this with a response, but...

BY: Tao Smith
Feb 2nd, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Wow, looks like someone has some serious self-confidence issues and is covering up for his own inadequacies by pointing out everyone else's. Classis, classic psychological situation. Kelly, get some help.
Response:

I shouldn't dignify this with a response, but...

BY: Tao Smith
Feb 2nd, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Wow, looks like someone has some serious self-confidence issues and is covering up for his own inadequacies by pointing out everyone else's. Classis, classic psychological situation. Kelly, get some help.
Response:

Wow, I just caught my breath from Laughing

BY: jt
Feb 3rd, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Kelly, Somehow you forgot to rag on me! That rant is priceless. I am not sure what was the funniest line but...wow! Awesome!
Response:

300lbsofshit?

BY: kpark
Feb 7th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


who the hell are you? Why did you have to use such hurtful language? I am very sensitive. Anyways, I am going to assume that since you are 300 lbs, you are Pelletier, but I didn't think Pelletier could figure out how to turn on a computer let alone type or even write for that matter, so he must be giving Hadley a reach around while he orated his email message to Hadley. Seth Warren is probably there selling something with his complete lack of social skills while DesChamps cries in the corner about a hook I gave him back in October. Weglarz is currently mounting Hadley's dog while Frazier, Harrington, Jessiman & Pearse all have a Defensemen's Circle Jerk. DeFelice & Marrazzo are eating some italian tube steaks & Donny Powers & Jay Smith are playing a fun game of slap & tickle in the back yard. Oh who else is there? I am going to assume that Holland, Isabelle, Geiger & Sinclair are playing hide the hotdog in the basement too. See you ladies tonight.
Response:

BY: 300lbsofshit
Feb 7th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


oh kelly are you tired yet? Just got back form south Boston Recruiting some fellas and will there with open arms tonight... come watch is kick some more serious ass fuck face!
Response:

Just too easy

BY: kpark
Feb 7th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


JT, I didn't really forget to rag on you...I just thought it would be too easy to do considering you are a daddy daycaring, capaccino drinking, scone eating, head cased goalie who loves Brokeback Mountain and couldn't stop a dead dog from licking his balls . So I figured you were too easy of a target. By the way, we are going to light Tuck tonight.
Response:

Any Bets?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 10th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Due to the recent controversy concerning gambling in the NHL, I'm considering a gambling ring of my own, for the UVHL. It will cover everything from, how many times Kelly Park will vote for himself in the forum. How often Tony Gove trims that 70's porn stache. How many Red Bulls Hadley needs to get up for the game. How many times I'll fall down in any given game. And maybe the outcome of the games. Oh, and how many times Kelly's seen Brokeback Mountain. I'm guessing he sat up front real close with his camcorder, so he won't have to pay every time he goes. Besides they probably have a restraining order against him for indecent exposure. Who will win the coveted Whalen Cup? I know the Nords will be ready.
Response:

Tough call

BY: kpark
Feb 14th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


I've only seen Humpback Mountain 3 times. But I did record it the third time and watched it at home 12 times since. So I think I win that one. Additionally, I agree that wagers should be put on the UVHL games. I'm also putting money on the fact that Gove doesn't even have a mustache, that's just his horrible looking lip. Really weird isn't it. Marshy will fall down every other shift. Hadley doesn't have Red Bulls before games, he has a nice big glass of man goooooo. Yeah, I know, that's pretty disgusting hadley. Addtionally, the Nordiques will win the Whalen Cup this year for the 2nd time in 3 years. It's going to be an impressive feat.
Response:

I pissed my pants laughing!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 20th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


This is one of the funniest things I have ever read in my life! I can't stop laughing and I think I peed just a little bit. Luckily the Depends keep it from showing...
Response:

NORDIQUES?SILVER?RANGERS?

BY: hkydoc
Feb 20th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Park! I can't breathe, I'm laughing too hard! My face hurts! HA! That is THE funniest shit you have EVER written! I daresay you have a gift, my friend! Whoever the fuck we are this year we will raise the Whalen Cup! What is our team name going to be next year?
Response:

BY: hkydoc
Feb 20th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


I'm gonna bet that Turtle has a playoff hissy fit about something, that the Nords will play for the Whalen Cup and it will go into OT yet again, that Kelly isn't getting any faster and that Fat Bastard can STILL beat him in a race, that Coakley will win the scoring title (bastard), that the Kingers will miss Park and Sinclair during the Playoffs, that people will never stop bitching about something (although it has been remarkably better the past several weeks), that JT will have his playoff A game, that beer will be drunk out of the Whalen Cup at Off The Green, that the Bruins Alumni will mop the ice with the Kingers because they never want to lose and will turn it up and shut down any asshole who disrespects them again, that the Alanas/Alannas love their husband's cookie dusters, and that I, Fat Bastard himself, the Commish, will get a goal in the playoffs. Suck on that, eh.
Response:

Good predictions

BY: kpark
Feb 21st, 2006 @ 12:00AM


McDermott those are all good predictions EXCEPT FOR THE one where you will score a goal. But I will try my hardest to set you up! DONE. Here goes my latest prediction......I predict that........Pelletier is fat. There it is!
Response:

BY: sfras
Feb 24th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


I can't believe I am going to say this but...

I agree with Kelly. ooh I think I am gonna be sick....


It would be nice to look at the website and see the write ups and have the stats be up to date. I thought that was part of what we were paying for in "VT's premier Mens League".

I still cant believe I agree with Kelly, I think the world is going to end.
Response:

Seriously Disappointed.

BY: kpark
Feb 24th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Is anyone else disappointed with the fact that the commissioners never update the website in a reasonable amount of time? I really want to read what happened in the first two playoff games last night, but nope, they have too many more important things to do. Thanks for disappointing me.
Response:

What is EVEN WORSE

BY: kpark
Feb 28th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Ok, I take that back. The last thing I want to do is have Fraser agree with me. So I retract me earlier statement.



DISCLAIMER: Kelly Park does not have any affiliation with Scott or the UVHL Bruins and therefore does not Share any of the same thoughts or theories.
Response:

BY: ghadley
Feb 28th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


extrenely unfortunate situation has happened here what are we to do....... 1 game suspension?????
Response:

I agree

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 2nd, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Kelly, you would think that you'd celebrate with your OWN team after a big win, but I guess you really needed to rub in that ass-kicking we put on the Bruins, Oh well, tough luck. I seriously hope that next week you don't run in the Storm Kings dressing room like, "Oh I'm A Storm King Now" because the Nordiques are gonna take the Whalen Cup straight to the bar, and fill er up! Go Nords!
Response:

BY: sfras
Mar 2nd, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Too Late park it is in writing.

There is a rumor you were in the Bruins Lockerroom after the game Tuesday and you were pulling the train and leading the Circle jerk....

Wow talk about a busy night for you....
Response:

Rubbin' It in

BY: kpark
Mar 3rd, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Yes Marshy, I did go into the other teams locker room to RUB IT IN. I first had to point out that it would have been a much closer game if Hadley wasn't in net. Then I told the Overstuffed Burrito(Pelleteir) that he was starting to resemble the Stay Puff Marshmallow Man, or the Goodyear Tire guy. I then listened to them bitch and moan about the refs, mostly Stay Puff. I then reiterated the fact that it is ALWAYS THE PUSSIES WITH FULL CAGES THAT SWING THEIR STICKS LIKE Michael Myers at a Teenage Beauty Camp. I would also like to state that in my 10 years of men's league I have never hit anyone in the face, I have hooked the hell out of the now NOT MULLETED David Des CHAMPS and loved every second of it though. Additionally, I would like to put this out there for all to hear......our not-so-beloved captain Tao Smith, did NOT assign NOR bring beer. That is a dispicable display of capainship. HORRIBLE. We are going to whoop up on the Storm Kings on Tuesday night. I am going to score 37 goals on Le FRENCHY.
Response:

Bruins alum game

BY: tgove
Mar 7th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


I would like to praise all those members of the storm kings and the few locals who played along with the bruins on saturday afternoon. Each and everyone of you acted like true sportsmen and it was a pleasure to have had the opp. to referee the game along with gary and richard. ( I know they had a blast also) I know the bruins had a good time and will be back for some more next year. Congrats and thanks for creating such a great tradition.
PS. CJ---lyndon couldn't stop asking where you were and terry came along for a little of that also.
Response:

Thanks, Nordiques

BY: Tao Smith
Mar 8th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Thank you, to all of the Nordiques for a great season. You guys worked hard every game and were a great team to play with. Congratulations on the win last night. On another note: I am a little disappointed that the write-ups and stats are not already posted from last night. I sort of hoped to be able to read up on the highlights this morning. Maybe the commishs are still sleeping in...if so, wake up and get to work, damn it!
Response:

1st of many victories for the Leafs

BY: scasnh
Mar 23rd, 2006 @ 12:00AM


It seems as though the "unorthodox forecheck" stiffled that damn toe drag move that you use 100 times a game to create the facade that you have any idea what the hell you are doing out there. I have been watching game film and researching specific defenses from the special olympics and we should have your whole team's game figured out very soon. Oh wait, it is already clear to the rest of the league that the Nords success is clearly linked to Will Meyer's play all year. Next year I am implementing a three on one coverage system that will shut him down and stop him from scoring 5 goals a game against us, mark my words. In fact, now that I think of it, I wonder if he snagged the Whalen Cup, knowing that he alone deserves to drink from it. He was there the other night when it was stolen, maybe McD should break out the polygraph machine! I have been tirelessly working to improve the Leafs and it seems as though I have found the key to last weeks success. Yes, I went on vacation and didn't play, so the normal "Swiss Cheese" defense that I provide for Kenny wasn't it's normal factor in the game's outcome. In fact, I might be able to convince him to throw in some money whenever I want to go on vacation during the season. That just might work! I will use any strategy at my fingertips to turn the Leafs into a winning hockey machine! Yes, even if it means trading Chip for Meyer!

sc
Response:

OUCH!!!!

BY: kpark
Mar 23rd, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Yeah, this is my way of getting back at you little rat punks over there on the Maple Leafs for NOT BEING competitive and rolling over you all season long in the UVHL to our SECOND Whalen Cup in 3 years. To tell you the truth, we were all still day dreaming about our big championship win, that we didn't even care about playing the lowly Maple Leafs and even decided to throw the game so that you guys would feel better about yourselves. DO YOU WANNA TRASH TALK PUNK!!!! I AM THE KING OF TRASH TALKING. I INVENTED IT WHILE SKATING VERY VERY VERY SLOW CIRCLES AROUND THE MAPLE LEAFS. It's true, I am deceptively slow. That is just what I do. But, on a serious note, I messed up and started adding players to this weeks game rosters, that is why some of the Leafs have 2 games, as for the goal issue, I'll look into it this afternoon. Thirdly, you guys threw an ASS WHOOPIN' on us last week. We had no answer to your unorthodox forecheck. See you guys tonight. Kelly
Response:

smack talk for the web master

BY: scasnh
Mar 23rd, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Park, are you taking care of the stats on the website? I find it odd that after one game of Mud League all my Leafs are listed as playing 2 games and that we crushed that one team 4-1 and only 2 players are listed with goals. Do you outsource the stat translation from the game sheets to the School for the Blind, or are you just mad at how good the new Leafs are getting and this is your little way of getting back at us. Real mature! You can make fun of me all you want, sure I have a little "trouble" skating, stick handling, passing and shooting, but don't mess with my guys. They deserve credit when credit is due. Are you trying to instigate a smack talk riot, because I just might start to throw down! That's all I will say for now, well, except that you guys are right beer does tatse better out of the Whalen Cup!

Sincerely,
Leafs Captain-Sean Messier
Response:

No Deal

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 26th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Let me be the first to say NO DEAL on the chip for Meyer trade. Will may have been a big part of our offense last season, but the Nords could beat the Make Beliefs any day! With or without Meyer. Second, We would be interested in a Redden for Park deal. Whadda ya say Casavant? I think I can pull some strings , since I'm gonna be the assistant co-commisioner next season. We're sick of Kelly's crap, and his 0-60 in about 60 seconds. He still hasn't had the balls to race me. He scared! Seriously though,the new look leafs did impress me in week 1. This week we'll be ready though. Later, MARSHY!
Response:

Shitty Deal for the Leafs

BY: kpark
Mar 27th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Well, to be honest with you...with my lazy play, horrible stick-handling & lack of movement out on the ice, I would say that the Redden for Park deal would be a steal for the Nordiques. But even with my ankle bending, lazy ass, I at least know how to play positional hockey unlike Marshy. So in an effort to make the Nordiques better I am willing to trade myself & Marsh from the Nordiques to the Leafs for Cassavant and a used a roll of toilet paper.
Response:

trading block

BY: scasnh
Mar 28th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


How on earth could I trade Redden? He is our only source of the "juice". Everyone thinks that we are getting better through hard work, hard drinking, and team spirit, but when the Leafs book is written in a few years it will come out that Freddy has all let us borrow some of his roids in our pursuit of the cup. If you have the cajones to shower with the Leafs you will see that everyone has back acne, pea sized balls, and pussy nipples. It is quite a site! It'll all be worth it when we share a beer out of the Mud League Cup in the ICU at the Hitch. The new Leafs captain is for real, folks, and will stop at nothing to relieve his tortured soul from his high school failures of not making the Mount championship teams for 4 years in a row! Marshy, I just hope that as the new "assistant co-commisioner" you don't try to implement any random urine testing or any underhanded tricks that could get my whole squad disqualified, just because you are afraid of the new look Leafs and know that they WILL win Mud League. On another note, I would try to make a deal for Kelly before the deadline for a run at the championship. The conditions attached are that he would have to beat Kenny in a race from goal line to goal line, shave that rediculous mangina that he calls facial hair, get a new stick handling move, get me a major discount at Ibex, and of course seriously bolster my stats on the website. When those conditions are met I will come up with a sweet packge for him sure to include the five skunked Natty Ice's that have been in my hockey bag for 6 months, a really huge tape ball that I have been making for the last 2 years, a free skate sharpening to be done by yours truly, a full body message from Heavy, and The Whalen Cup! You are losing money if you don't get Kelly to agree to these terms! See you boys out there this Thursday, be ready. Just because we are 4-20-2 when I am in the line up doesn't mean you guys can walk right over us! Stats don't lie, oooops, if that's the case then maybe I should retire soon, or at least have Kelly "touch them up" on the web site!

Peace,
sc
Response:

Thursday night blues

BY: scasnh
Mar 29th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


My prediction is that the 1-2 Leafs will rally and help to break their short, drunk, but ruggedly hansom captain's bad mojo and pull out the big "W" to get to 0.500. At 8:30, the Nords will get out their ham bones and start playin' the blues to forget their woes and the beating that was just put on them by the best looking squad in the league! Just remember guys, any foe is welcome in our locker room for a beer or two, as long as you are willing to endure the embarrasment of being on the business end of a major "can of whoop ass" and are willing to take a beer from the guys who gave it to you! The sun is shining, the bird are chirping, the temp is rising, but there is still a big sheet of ice to play out our fantasies on. Spring hockey is here and ALIVE boys, lets get psyched and see some freakin' smack talk. Sure, it's time to help your wives out in the garden and bring the kids to the park to play on the swings, or maybe even join that soft ball team that you have been dreaming about, but GOOD LORD, the powers that be allow us to keep an ice surface in a cement and aluminum building, let's take advantage of it! Challange to the Nords: losing captain buys the first round at Murphy's! By the way, I reserve the right to not suit up if the challange is taken, since we are 4-20-2 with me in the line up! But Nords, still expect an ass whoopin' by the Uncle Heavy lead Leafs on Thursday night. Peace, see you out there!

SC
Response:

secrets to captaincy

BY: scasnh
Mar 30th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


First of all, it is a huge honor to be captain in such a great league and of such a great bunch of guys. Let's be honest, I was not chosen for my on ice abilities, that is clear to all. Basically, our best player didn't want to lead on and off the ice, so after seeing my intense love for the game (we're talking almost McD level here!), he appointed me the Leafs captain. I learned how to gain respect from people when doing time, and I figured that the locker room is as close to prison as I could get. So, before my first game as acting captain, I locked the locker room door, picked the biggest guy in the room, and proceeded to kick his ass until the rest of the team had to pull me off of him. The look on the team's face said it all, "This guy is our new leader, we will do what he says or pay the dire consequences!". The Leafs don't talk much about it, but that is why they listen to me, even though I'm not all that good at hockey. Oh yeah, there's that, and the fact that I buy them obscene amounts of beer all the time! I can't tell which is more effective. So according to my calculations, McD, either you have to beat Marshy to a bloody pulp tonight before the game to prove your worth, or you can show up with a frat party's worth of beer! Either of these suggestions WILL get you much respect in the locker room, trust me! Use this advice wisely and you can't loose! Unless, you chose to take on Marshy and he just tears you apart, limb by limb, that might be considered some kind of loss! Good luck and choose wisely!

sc
Response:

Headless Nords are in shambles!

BY: hkydoc
Mar 30th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Seannie, I'm not sure if i can take that bet. Park has officially been removed as Captain of the Nords for his NO-SHOW last Saturday against the geriatric Cock Smokers. Without his snail-like speed we were able to explode for 11 goals after scoring a measley two goals in the previous two games. However, my pathetic GM skills are beginning to show once again as half my line-up is official subs and not regulars. How the hell do you get everybody there each and every week? The co-commish has no pull whatsoever in keeping a team together! I'm a horrible leader, and noone wants to follow me. What is your secret? Maybe we can discuss it over those delish Natty Lights that are still in your hockey bag? We'll be lucky to stay within 2 goals of your well oiled machine known as the Leafs since we'll be having new players each and every week in and out of our line-up just to make sure we have at least 10 skaters. I'm not sure we can contain Uncle Douggie for the whole game, and if Freddy's groin starts responding to the juice then the Nords are in trouble. By the way, your post on the trade thread in the Forum was hilarious! As the now acting captain of the Nords, I, Fat Bastard, the Commish, HKYDOC, will take that bet and raise you a Heap'O'Wings @ Murphy's! See you on the ice at 7:10 PM shaaaaarp, eh!
Response:

interesting choices

BY: scasnh
Mar 31st, 2006 @ 12:00AM


I would have thought that the Smokers would have used Campion instead of the "cement handed" Coakley in the shootout. I guess management made a good decision, since their chance choice paid off with a sick goal. I think that JT is still dizzy after the array of stick handling moves Coakes used from the top o' the circles in. Good thing I spent some extra time with Sean showing him some nifty moves, otherwise that shot probably would have hit JT right in the bread basket! The battle of the Mud League giants was fun to watch. Good job guys. The Leafs - No Dicks battle was also a close,solid game. My theory has proven true. The Leafs are now 1-0 w/out me in the line up and 0-3 with me in the line up. Maybe I should hang the skates up and just give stick handling lessons to the UVHL super stars! Well, maybe not, I have way too much fun drinking, playing, and strategerizing to quit just yet. Speaking of quitting, what's the deal with the weak showing at the bar. The Leafs plowed through well over 36 LaBatts after losing a close one, then they had the strongest representation at the bar! I thought that this was a "beer" league! For those of you that missed it, Murphy's was worth the trip just to see McD eat a salad, then gun 20+ wings while working up a nice sweat! You can't buy that kind of entertainment, folks! Seriously, I even wagered a round and some wings and had no takers. Park and crew, you guys need to grow some balls and step up to the plate. Please, in the name of hockey and all that is sacred, clean out your manginas and start drinking some beer!

peace,
sc (UVHL stickhandling coach)
Response:

I LOVE THE SHOOTOUT!

BY: hkydoc
Mar 31st, 2006 @ 12:00AM


There were some sick goals last night in the first Mud League shootout! This was an exciting end to a great game for the extra point, and Gino Riffle scored on Frenchy for Potter, and Sean Coakley and Dean Cashman scored on JT (subbing in for Jake Obar in potter's net) for the Smoke Eaters in the battle of the (perhaps) current two best Upper Valley men's league teams. Shootouts are awesome!
Response:

Good advice

BY: hkydoc
Mar 31st, 2006 @ 12:00AM


That was some good advice, Sean. I'll take it to heart. Beer always works, and I'm more of a lover than a fighter. However, I'm ending up more like the warden (not by chioce) than a fellow prisoner in the UVHL and the gen pop is starting to riot. Hockey heart is why you're the captain of the Leafs, AND you DO have game, so don't be so hard on yourself. Yeah, there are only a handfull of Meyer, Coakley and Sinclairs in the league. The rest of us Klunks have to get by on hardwork and teamwork. Nice post-game last night @ Murphy's. Amy is a gamer and JY deserves to be lashed with a wet noodle a thousand times for bodychecking a girl in a non-contact hockey game AND for not apologising. Dickhead! I love wings...mmmmmm!
Response:

Captaincy is so overrated!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Apr 2nd, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Casavant, you make a great captain. I like the fact you're vocal. People respond to a good yelling at, and from what I've seen, you like to get your point across. I really think our captain dropped the ball as far as recruiting for the mud league Nordiques. Not to mention blaming me for three goals against JT, which I really take responsibility for 1 maybe 2. Besides, everyone's entitled to a bad game. I can have 1 can't I? Seriously though, the real test will be next season when we get a fresh start in the UVHL. The Leafs got off to a bad start , that you never really recovered from. Granted that ALL of your players pass the Anti-Doping legislation passed down from the Assistant to the Co-Commisioner, we'll talk about a trade. Although Kelly busts my balls on a regular basis, I think he's a big part of our team. He still thinks I'm slow, yet he hasn't raced me yet. See you on the Ice. MARSHY
Response:

wadda ya think?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Apr 2nd, 2006 @ 12:00AM


I would like to see the opposite team choose the three skaters for the shootout. This would really create some glory for people that might not get the chance to prove themselves. Wadda ya think?
Response:

proposal for statistical evidence

BY: scasnh
Apr 3rd, 2006 @ 12:00AM


As I read McD's verbal assault on Marshy's suspect play in the defensive end, and sticking him with LVP for it, I wonder how we can track a players "true" input into a game's outcome. My proposal is that we give the clock guy some extra dough or even some more weed, whatever it would take, and keep track of everyone's +/-. This way, we'll know for sure who is doing their part. Maybe we can give some sort of booby prize (no not those kind of boobies, Heavy!) for the player with the worst +/- rating at the end of the year. This could add a whole new realm to the smack talk in the league. OK, not realistic, but it would give some of us muckers the much deserved accolades that we are entitled to for just doing our job every night. On another note, did anyone notice that the great Brad Park can still stickhandle in a phone booth and when he turned on the jets he left his immobile D partner in the freakin' dust! If I were the Nordiques GM and I saw that, I would try to unload that dead weight in a second, especially before the playoffs get here! I need a solid towel/water boy for the Leafs, so I'll take the younger Park off your hands for The Whalen Cup and a gift certificate giving your whole team free wings at OTG for next year's UVHL season. That offer won't be out there for long, so do the math and get back to me. Speaking of Kelly's speed issues, what's the deal with the delay on the stats making the website? Are we supposed to possibly believe that he is just as slow in typing as he is on the ice? That is just plain unfathomable! I mean, how am I supposed to impress all those chicks in the Hanover High computer lab with my stories of on ice accomplishments, if the website isn't even up to date! By the way, if any high school girls ask, just make sure to mention that I am the odds on favorite to lock up the scoring race! That should help my chances quite a bit! OK, maybe not, but I'll take all the help that I can get!!!! Peace!

sc (last year's undisputed booby prize winner, just ask Kenny!)
Response:

LVP

BY: hkydoc
Apr 3rd, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Marshy. I'll take the blame for the worst GM duties for Muds, but you DID screen JT for 3 goals and earned LVP. I however earned it against Potter and will make sure I call myself out on the bad game I had. We all have bad games, but we need to take ownership for it and laugh and come back more motivated for the next one, eh! Canada rules!
Response:

No takers? I won that bet, eh.

BY: hkydoc
Apr 3rd, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Whaddya mean no takers on the bet between captains? Look back in the Forum and you'll see that I took your wager and raised you a Heap'O Wings and I still got rooked for my part of the bill after we won 2-1. All in good fun though, eh. The Leafs are the best post-game team EVER. They have set the standard and raides the bar!
Response:

Congrats Leafs

BY: scasnh
Apr 7th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


I just wanted to congratulate my Leafs squad for their best team effort EVER! The Potter boys can freakin' play, no doubt, and it felt like we gave them a really tough game. McD and JT, you should surely keep trying to get them in for the UVHL season, that would be great for the league! It was a very clean and physical game, that was really fun to play in. I would personally like to thank #5 for his extra effort in making sure that my cup worked in front of our net, that was pretty nice of him. It's comraderie like that which makes this the best league around! I hope you guys had fun too, see you out there next time!

sc
Response:

latest line in Vegas

BY: scasnh
Apr 7th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Word on the street is that Park blatantly tipped in a goal on JT, then couldn't score on Frenchy in the shootout. On top of all that he still lead all players on the ice in smack talk! My bookie says that Park is the odds on favorite to get LVP for the Nords-Eaters game hands down! Place your bets! Good games last night guys, Mud League has been a blast, even though my squad hasn't won with me in the line up yet! Coincidence, I think NOT! Peace, have a good weekend!
sc
Response:

I'll take those odds

BY: kpark
Apr 8th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Yes, it is true. I tipped in a WEAK shot from Sinclair right over Turners left shoulder, I then completely and utterly embarrassed myself in the shootout. I have since removed myself from the shootout lineups and have since placed myself on the 5th line. It is also true that I am leading the entire Northeast in Trash Talking. Hey, I figure if I can't get it done on the ice, I might as well divert everyones attention from my ankle-bending piss-poor play.
Response:

Where is the Whalen Cup?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Apr 9th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Last time I checked the Whalen cup was missing. Does anyone know the whereabouts? I think someone's doing utterly dispicable acts with the cup. If someone drops a Cleveland Steamer in the bowl, I'll opt for a new cup next season.
Response:

not done yet...

BY: scasnh
Apr 13th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


2)Park gets LVP for 2nd week in a row 3)Leafs captain puts up a Messier like performance and scores a hat trick 4)JT quits hockey because of #3 5)McD yells at Dakai and says, "I'm sick of carrying your lazy ass, I want a new D partner!". Then he proceeds on his training regimen for the biggest loser contest with a heaping plate of diet wings at Murphy's 6)Marshy gets off 15 shots, 1 actually hits the net 7)Homeschool falls off the wagon and gets lit at Murphy's due to an embarrasing performance 8)The Nordiques get thrown out of the league, despite having both co-commishes on it's roster, for what can only be decribed as a "Roman bath house-like" scene in the locker room 9)Leafs drink a record number of locker room beers in celebration of their victory and continue thier off ice supremacy! Just a gut feeling, see you guys out there! sc
Response:

predictions

BY: scasnh
Apr 13th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


1)Leafs beat Nordiques 3-1
Response:

LOVED IT

BY: kpark
Apr 14th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Cassavant, that was hysterical. Laughed my ass off. Especially since we DOMINATED YOU LAST NIGHT. I even took it easy on you. Did you notice. I don't like to try to hard against mildly retarded people, you can just call me a humanitarian.
Response:

were did the generosity genes go?

BY: scasnh
Apr 19th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


A story on nhl.com ends with this: It was a night like the NHL had never seen, and one that Park still remembers. "I was at Mr. Laffs (a popular New York pub)," he says, "and when I heard that the Blackhawks had won, I was so exited that I wound up buying a round at the bar. It was the most expensive round I ever bought.". Does this include the one he bought your mom? Interesting how dad buys beers for a whole bar and Kelly goes around the showers at Campion picking up loose change. I've never been in the Nords locker room, and probably don't want to know what goes on in there, but I'll bet my life that Park NEVER brings the beer! That right there would get you cut from the Leafs in a second. See you Thursday for Muds and NHL playoff eve celebration. peace-sc


Response:

WOW

BY: kpark
Apr 20th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


That is a pretty bold statement Cassavant. But I actually just brought beer. A nice cool 18 pack of the SILVER BULLET BABY. Anyways, I heard rumors that they wanted to kick you off of the team because you NEVER bring beer, but I had to point out to them that they never see your midget ass walk into the locker room and put it down. It's tough seeing you around those new hockey bags....they are so big and bulky. So next time you walk in with a couple of cans of Milwaukee's Best. Do some jumping jacks so that they can visualize the leprechaun carrying the 4 pack. See you tonight. Kelly
Response:

BY: gluestick
May 11th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


I dont know where they got the belleville AL from its Ontario Canada . Hi commish McDermott from your cousin Glenn. You guys schooled us in Montreal so you have bragging rights for this yr. Waiting patiently until next tourney. Congrats and say hello to the family
Response:

Greetings from Canada

BY: gluestick
May 11th, 2006 @ 12:00AM



Response:

Wazzup, Cuz?

BY: hkydoc
May 13th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Glenn! Thanks for sending me some trash talk on our Forum! I hope you checked out some of the stuff in the other Forum threads (there is some funny shit in there, eh!). Alanna and I and the rest of the Northstars team had a blast in Montreal. It was such a great surprise to see you up there since we had no idea that each other would be there. Thankfully this tourney went to my side of the McDermott extended family for this year, and I'm looking forward to a rematch next year. We're going again, same weekend in 2007. I can send you the DVD of the game to play at Uncle Charles' ordination next weekend if you want. You can reminice about my stalwart D, two penalties, your excellent playmaking vision, and the hockey stripper! I'm trying to get my lazy ass webmaster to put up the video clip of your teammate's most excellent show, and I even called him today to bust his balls, so hopefully he'll get it done soon. Tell your teammates when it is up so they can all check it out. Get Rob to come next year in April, eh! Send me your e-mail so I can keep in touch better. See you on the ice, Cuz! Give our love to the rest of the family, we can't make it next weekend.
Response:

Vegas Tourney

BY: Freeze 19
May 21st, 2006 @ 12:00AM


It was "fun" playing against you guys. Even though we were a bit overmatched, JT isn't much of a goaltender. Not sure how you won the games you did with him in net, especially when I light him up right off the face-off. You can thank Will for not getting in my way and allowing me to walk him off the draw. Kelly wasn't very impressive either. In all honesty, those three didn't do much out there.
Response:

Vegas Tourney

BY: Freeze 19
May 21st, 2006 @ 12:00AM


It was "fun" playing against you guys. Even though we were a bit overmatched, JT isn't much of a goaltender. Not sure how you won the games you did with him in net, especially when I light him up right off the face-off. You can thank Will for not getting in my way and allowing me to walk him off the draw. Kelly wasn't very impressive either. In all honesty, those three didn't do much out there.
Response:

BY: Freeze 19
May 23rd, 2006 @ 12:00AM


We're thinking about trying to put together a new team for our league...obviously the one we were on just doesn't cut it. However, if we can get a decent group, and afford the trip, we will consider it.
Response:

NICE

BY: kpark
May 23rd, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Hey man, that is great to get the perspective from one of our opponents. Yeah, you are absolutely right about Turner being un-impressive. I think that he was so unorthodox out that it threw you guys off a bit. Yeah, I don't know if you even saw our resident midget, Will, out there. He kind of gets lost in the crowd. As for me. I was the superstar out there putting on a skating clinic. It is scary how NASTY I AM. You guys have to make it out to the Placid tourney next February, that is a blast too. It's like Vegas without the heat and chicks and nudity and coolness. But at least its a DRY HEAT.

Kelly
Response:

The King's Classic is a good time

BY: jt
May 26th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Excellent idea! We would love to have you guys down for our tourney. If you think you may be interested we can work a deal on rooms and possibly food. We are trying to have a local restaurant sponsor the league in some way. Are you guys playing summer hockey?
Response:

The King's Classic is a good time

BY: jt
May 26th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Excellent idea! We would love to have you guys down for our tourney. If you think you may be interested we can work a deal on rooms and possibly food. We are trying to have a local restaurant sponsor the league in some way. Are you guys playing summer hockey?
Response:

Without you it would have been 9-0, or more!

BY: jt
May 26th, 2006 @ 12:00AM



Response:

We partied too little!

BY: jt
May 26th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


The hockey gods frowned on our poor showing at the bar and gave the team from Detroit 5 powerplay goals! All joking aside they were the best team we played all year. We played hard they moved the puck well and were a half step faster. Hey... way to blow my shutout with the backhand wiff! I hope we keep in touch and maybe we can put a team together to come play you guys?!!!!
Response:

BY: Freeze 19
May 26th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


What the heck happened in the championship game? Too much partying at Hooters? JT may not have been the greatest in net, but you can't say he's all to blame for that outcome.
Response:

BY: Freeze 19
May 27th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


We are playing summer hockey, but it's just a few guys from our team. The summer session isn't very competitive, we play with and against guys that play in our C division. Seriously, if we can get a decent together and we can afford it, we'll do what we can to make it out there for the tourney. We can keep in touch and work out some details as the time gets closer. You can email me at marc_draper@comcast.net
Response:

Missing in Action

BY: The Dark Canuck
May 28th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Boys, I would have loved to have been in Vegas for the tourney. I'm hoping I'll get to the tourney in Montreal late summer. Lake Placid is a possibility also for next year. However, if there's any alcohol being consumed, I'm gonna have to pass. Yeeeaaahhhhh Rrrrriiiiiggghhhhtttt. I'm so all over that. I'll have to bound and gag my wife though. Good luck in summer hockey boys, See ya @ Tao's party on the 10th. MARSHY!!!!!!!!!
Response:

Let the bullshit begin!

BY: hkydoc
Aug 17th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Players, let's get the TRASH TALK going again, eh. Its mid-August and I'm feelin' the itch for hockey, as all good Canadians do at this time of year. I'm losin' interest in golf and can't wait for Campion to open for some morning skates and noon hour pick-up hockey. Fat Bstard, aka the Commish, will be rrrrreaaaaadyyyy for the puck to drop and will emerge victorious in the UVHL's Biggest Loser competition!!!
Response:

BY: hkydoc
Aug 17th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


No, really, you can seriously fuck off now.

Kelly - please delete this asshole's bullshit, it is taking up unnecessary space. thanks.
Response:

Fuck you.

BY: hkydoc
Aug 17th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Hey, whoever you are, get the fuck off our website. Go sell your shit somewhere else. If you are a UVHLer, then I can e-mail your request to the league, otherwise fuck off, asshole. Sincerely, The Commish.
Response:

Dr. McDirt

BY: kpark
Aug 18th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


McD, I am only half Canadian, but I AM DEFINITELY READY for some hockey. Mud League wasn't bad, Summer Hockey needed more of you lazy bastards to get off of your asses, and I am in detox preparing for Season 4. I'm going to break Coakley's knee & get Meyer some hair plugs, so he will think that he is good looking and won't show up to the games, so that I have a slight chance at the scoring title. I'm also planning on losing 20 lbs, learning to skate and putting some solid effort into my trash talking before October 10th. I would also like to say that Cassavant is a smurf.
Response:

Not so fast McD

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 1st, 2006 @ 12:00AM


The real loser here is Park for trashin Canadians. We already know your father is one of the most famous Canadian Hockey players ever(Hall of Fame)but show some class. Seriously though, I've actually taken up jogging. Its free and I think I'll need the extra workout to edge out fat bastard for the UVHL Biggest loser. I'm down 13 lbs McD. Good luck! When is the weigh-in anyway? Im not worried, Kell has for sure been pounding one after another all summer long. And I don't mean pussy. I also predict another Nord victory this season. I'll even go as far as to say I'll have a side bet with Kelly. Whoever has the least amount of points buys Red Sox Tickets for the first game after the UVHL season. Put up or shut up Park. I hear the Leafs will have some ringers this season, courtesy of Fred Redden, by way of the CHL. For you americans, thats Canadian Senior A. We'll have to see! Good Luck Losers!
Response:

DOG BALLS?!?!

BY: kpark
Sep 3rd, 2006 @ 12:00AM


I love dog balls, they taste like chicken. Marshy, I'm in, but we are also going to count Plus Minus on the season and figure that into the equasion because I am a two way PLAYA and you are a lazy bastard. That was mean, but true. Secondly, the Bruins retooled? Don't you mean, the Bruins a bunch of Tools?!?!?! HA HA HA!!! I am SO clever. Anyways, Marshy, that was hurtful and I appologize, the Nords ARE DEFINITELY going to take the cup for the 4th out of 5 years because we have chemistry and really good looks!!!!! By the way, who is the BigBadBruin? You have to at least give us a clue.



But seriously, I'm pumped for hockey to start back up. I've cut back from a 12 pack a night to 11 a night, stopped putting salt and mayo on my fried foods & I now pee standing up!!!! SWEET, I'm down .2 lbs!!!!
Response:

BY: bigbadbruins
Sep 3rd, 2006 @ 12:00AM


boys the bruins have retooled............get ready for some ass wooping girls ..... Kelly you suck dog balls
Response:

I like squatting to pee, eh.

BY: hkydoc
Sep 9th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


So, you're actually trying to re-build yourself for speed, huh? Keep trying skinny, cuz Fat Bastard is ready and waiting to take you up on the race from red line to red line you constantly keep chickening out of! Unfortunately, I have relinquished the lead in the Biggest Loser competition due to a momentary lapse of judgement and discipline. Marshy still has the lead (way to go buddy). But whatever happens, the Nords will be in better shape on Opening Night 2006 than we were at the end of last season. No matter what, lets all keep pushing our pre-conditioning! Scasnh - you ARE hard core, buddy! Nice to see you this morning at the 8AM skate, and to have you back for one of my wife's famous muffins post-game (no, not that kind of muffin, you perverts). MMMMM, banana chocolate chip muffins.
Response:

I love Hockey!

BY: jt
Sep 10th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Way to get it started gentlemen. I can't wait to get on the ice! My conditioning program starts tomorrow at 7:30 AM. Hopefully I can lose some weight or I might get cut. I hope not to get injured in my first skate of the new season. --JT
Response:

BY: sfras
Sep 12th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Park you are still a pussy. It would be one thing if you were any good, but you are not. If I can skate around you that means you play D as well as a Traffic Cone.


See you boys on the ice.
Response:

McD that is the problem!!

BY: kpark
Sep 13th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Shawn, that is the problem. EVERYTHING tastes like chicken to you!!! HA. Just kidding. Fraser, I am going to make you look like the shitbum loser you are out there this season. My goal is to embarass you EVERY time you are on the ice with me......and I really don't think that will be a problem. Good news on my front...I am down a whole .72 lbs from last season....it is a miracle how much weight you can lose when your snot nosed kid brings home a virus from daycare!
Response:

Fraser and JT! Nice!

BY: hkydoc
Sep 13th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Nice to see you guys contributing to the bullshit! JT, it was great to see you bright and early Mon morn @ Campion, eh! No first skate injuries to be told of, and I'm still fatter than you so you have nothing to worry about. Fraser, I'm gonna skate around you like I went up the hill past your Blood's Seafood Truck on the right side and make you blow another gasket Mr. Road Rage, that is unless you cheap shot me and get suspended again! Nice to see you getting into the mix, Scottie! Any chance you can get to Campion for some pick-up before the pre-season? Al, Kevin and myself were there on Tues with a strong 3 out of 7 UVHL showing. Can you smell the hockey in the air? sniff, sniff, sniff...tastes like chicken...
Response:

Father of the Year?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 14th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Kelly , you certainly can make me laugh. Your snot - nosed kid? Nice ! Anyhoo, see you on the ice you fuckin' Sally0ass motherfuckers. Old-time hockey rules!!
Response:

BY: sfras
Sep 19th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


C'mon Park how do you even know its your kid?
Anyway hey ill be waiting for you on the blue line, we'll see who goes by whom.
Response:

Mmmmmm...chicken!

BY: hkydoc
Sep 19th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


I wish chicken didn't taste so damn good! Marshy has been rumored to have been 0.39 mph faster than last season already at a noon hour pick-up skate at Campion last week, but he still has a cannon for a shot/pass and definitely needs to add a new move to his arsenal. Actually, I heard that he gently adds a sex toy to his arsenal every Fri and Sat night when his wife is at work...PARK!!! I'm fat and I'm STILL faster than you!
Response:

Sassafras

BY: kpark
Sep 24th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Hey Sassafras. It may not be my kid, but I heard the milkman was a hell of a hockey player, so he's going to have some skills! Secondly. I am going to dismantle you all season long. Make sure that your team gets a good discount on Tampons, because we're all sick and tired of hearing you bitch. Down with the Bruins!!!!
Response:

Yawn....

BY: sfras
Sep 25th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Park this is starting to bore me more then watching you attempt to play this game...

Ill see you on the ice...
Response:

Great Skate last night

BY: kpark
Sep 30th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Hey guys, that was a blast last night. Great to get back out on the ice, but holy SHIT am I sore today! I can't believe how out of shape I am.
Response:

To bad Pelletier can't get on-line

BY: jt
Oct 9th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Words cannot express how dissappointed, no pissed off that I am at Rob. Pelletier, you suck! Your game went from average to aweful in two short seasons, and now to play in the "B" league...brutal. I think Robby is working on Tuesdays at OTG, we can rip on him week after week and then put a quarter in the tip jar!

-JT
Response:

Pelletier is a giant P@SSY!!!

BY: kpark
Oct 9th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


I would just like to say that the 400 lb man, Rob Pelletier, says that he can't handle the heat in the Big league and will be playing down in the B-League all season. Any thoughts on this? He's such a loser!!!
Response:

Wow, new look UVHL!

BY: kpark
Oct 13th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


The other night was a blast....especially with us(Nords) SHALLACKING the Storm Kingers with a full squad. All they were missing was the goon machine, penalty taking, Tommy "The Axe" Scull. Tuck is retooled which is nice and I always love seeing Hadley get shelled. Not that he could see much with that giant snowman made of beer and fat, Rob Pelletier, standing in front of him all night. I watched some of the Avs game and they look very very good. Should be an interesting year.
Response:

Yaaaaaaahhh!

BY: hkydoc
Oct 14th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


I echo Park's sentiments. Sorry 'bout the write-ups not being posted yet boys, but I did e-mail them to most of you. I'm working on the Tuck-Leafs write-up from Opening Night. If you're missing them just e-mail me and I'll forward them to you, eh. This is sure to be an interesting year. Every team is improved and there won't be any off nights in the UVHL in '06-07! I LOVE HOCKEY! YAAAAAAAHHH!
Response:

I completely agree

BY: kpark
Oct 16th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Toney, I think you guys have done a great job so far. I think you can see the result of what Mens League hockey is becoming by looking at that ugly game between the Bruins & Storm Kings. Guys have to stop bitching about the penalty calls and just clean up their own game. I am happy about it because I tend to fall a bit more than anyone else out there, and if there is a stick on me, I have absolutely NO chance.
Response:

RULES vs. Mud league

BY: tgove
Oct 16th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


lets see is the UVHL like the mud league? well the only thing I see that is the same,are the players, however the Hockey is much better and faster. with the UVHL registered as a USA Hockey mens league you have to play by those rules, you can find all of those at WWW.USAHOCKEY.Com along with a video of the new standard. the rules have not changed just the emphises on calling them, you will find that the days of hooking,holding, interferrance and high sticks are gone.Now we will all see who still has the skills to play this game and who the top goaltenders are who can now stop those skilled players. look around it wont take long to weed out the players with skill from the players who are slow and need to cheat to get that advantage. It will take a while for everyone (players as well as refs) to adjust and yes there will be more penalty's handed out before its all figured out. will some players quit? oh probably. but eventually the game will be better off with out them and it will be a finess game vs. an ugly game. my suggestion is for you to talk to a thursday player where they are not registered with USA Hockey and the game is played similar to the old mud league oh and yes they play on thursday for FUN.
Response:

BY: tonyd
Oct 17th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


In theory it is a great new direction to take the game, the key will be in calling things consistantly, I'm sure Gove and Company will do that.
For our purposes in the UVHL with a pretty wide range in talent it is going to make it real difficult for the bottom 30% of the talent pool to defend against the top 10%. As seen in 5 of the first 6 games being won by more than 3 goals, and most of those goals coming from a pretyy limited number of players.
In that video on usahockey.com I noticed the emphasis is not only on stick work but interference. Being 5' nothing I hope this is taken as seriously in our league as the stick work. It doesn't take much effort from a 6 footer to "impede" the movement of us little guys in front of the net.
At the very least this will all give my fellow Bruins and I something new to Bitch and Whine about.
Tony
Response:

Skill vs. Sin!

BY: jt
Oct 17th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Well said Tony. My feeling is that one adjustment we may make, if the penalties continue in some games at an alarming rate and players are getting ejected for three infractions in one game, is to increase the total number of penalties per player per game to four. I agree that the game has gotten faster and there are certainly more goals being scored (on me!) I think it may take a few weeks to adjust. The major difference last season is that we could play hard and many calls were overlooked. There are my thoughts. What does everyone think? --JT
Response:

BY: scasnh
Oct 18th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


So far, besides scoring on Hadley (of course), my favorite part of the young UVHL season has occured off the ice watching an Avs game. Someone said, "Hey it looks like Park worked out a lot over the summer. He is ten times faster and has much better hands!" After assessing the situation and giving a loud "Park you suck" and getting absolutly no reaction, I realized that it wasn't Park at all. It is some young stud who dresses similarly to Park on the ice, but he is actually GOOD. Not to mention that he knows how good he is without really trying to convince everybody else around him, like Mr. Park. How sad, the son of a hall-of-famer who played 5th line club hockey at Syracuse, and TOTALLY washed up at age 29! Good lord, I'll take being short over that ANY DAY!!!!!!!!!! See you next week, LVP.

smurf out
Response:

You are wrong, that is a GREAT COMMERCIAL

BY: kpark
Oct 18th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Great idea for a commercial, especially if they show you ankle bending down the ice to score your goal!!!! But we should probably focus on the fact that it is if we focus on the fact that you and Hadley might make the Special Olympics squad this year.


I am going to predict a big 11-2 win over the Maple Leafs next year with me scoring 10 goals on Kenny and him owing me 10 beers post game. I additionally will take a 4 minute penalty for hip checking that smurf casavant. I'm going to have get get pretty low to get him though.
Response:

new uvhl commercial

BY: scasnh
Oct 18th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


uvhl team fee: $6000
locker room beers for season: $300+
wings and mini tacos at OTG: FREE!!!!!
scoring on Hadley: PRICELESS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Someone should take that to m/c and see if we can get sponsored! Great game B's, lots of fun. The league is much better this year, much more speed and talent. It looks like next year I might get demoted from player/coach/beer bitch/towel boy to coach/beer bitch/towel boy. Oh well, there's always Thursday nights, right? See you guys out there, and Park, keep your head up next week (I owe you one)! I'm already averaging 1.5 penalties per game! By the way (Deschamps & Home School), has anyone checked out the new rules regarding diving? You guys might want to look into that! Prediction for 10/24/06: Leafs 5 Nords 3, with Kenny getting MVP and Park getting LVP.

Response:

UVHL and Mud League are the same now, eh!

BY: hkydoc
Oct 19th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Since I took over the Mud League last season in 2006, the UVHL and the Mud League are now the same - both are USA Hockey sanctioned leagues. I do appreciate the parallel, Tony Gove, but the OLD Mud League is what you are referring to. We can now compare the UVHL with the Thursday night UAHL and the pre-2006 Mud League. So far this season JT and I have received may compliments on the improved quality of the UVHL. We must give credit back to the captains who, at this point, are mostly responsible for player recruiting. We think it is great to see more parity in the teams, and do agree that every team is better this season. Everyone will take some time to get used to the new rules, yes, but I agree the game will be better off in the long run, and even immediately to tell the truth. If we think it is necessary, we can increase the number of penalties to 4 for a game ejection to counterbalance the moer stringent standards, but I still think that if you get 3 penalties in a game you are hurting your team and the league, even if one is total bullshit.
Response:

Sunday Night Skates?

BY: kpark
Oct 20th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Hey guys, I was just thinking that it would be great if we could get a bunch of guys together for a night of UVHL pick up hockey. I found ice at Union on Sunday nights from 10:10 - 11:10. I know this is pretty late, but it would be a good time. Anyone interested?
Response:

Thursday

BY: paldrich
Oct 23rd, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Hey Gove,
I don't think the thursday league resembles the old mud league at all. Our penalties are DOWN this year, and the games have been much more competitive.

There has been much less bitching too. I haven't had to ask you "Are you F*&KIN BLIND" yet this season. (i know its coming though, wait for it)
Response:

It is true....I OWN KENNY LALLIER

BY: kpark
Oct 25th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


I just wanted to point out to ALL of you that Kenny Lallier & I had a little wager for last nights game that either he would shut me down or I would score at least one goal on him. It just so happens that I scored a beautiful goal from the point on a 104 MPH slap shot on Kenny and he owed me a beer at the bar. Kenny tried to reneg on the bet as well as had 20 excuses as to why he shouldn't have to pay up, but the bottom line is that I OWN Le Le Le Lallair.
Response:

The goal was shit

BY: hkydoc
Oct 26th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


As crucial as it was, we all know the goal was a shit-luck one that deflected off all 5 Leaf defenders before it trickled past Lallier, who even got a piece of it...however, I have no goals so I shouldn't talk. I'll be lucky to get one all year in all 37 combined UVHL and Mud League games, unless you count goals I deflect into my own net past JT...
Response:

I don't make any sense at all

BY: hkydoc
Oct 26th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Sorry, my last sentence was fucked up. You get the jist...you're not an old fart yet, eh.
Response:

Why not ask the Potter guys?

BY: hkydoc
Oct 26th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Hey, Park. Have you thought about asking the Potter guys? Oh, wait, I forgot! Woodstock is "too far" for them. Better fuggeddabouddit. But seriously, there will be enough Woodstock based players to get a regular group. Keep working on it. I'm out, I'm with the Northstars now on Sunday nights at Hartford (once the frickin' rink opens...). You're too young for that an old fart at least 35 yrs old to be in that one (but you are slow enough for it, eh). Good luck!
Response:

I OWN HADLEY'S FAT ASS

BY: kpark
Nov 1st, 2006 @ 12:00AM


I would just like to state the obvious when I say that I burnt Hadley last night like one of his gas soaked gay porn videos. I don't even know why he puts on his goalie equipment anymore!!!!! That's all for now. How about some of you losers start contributing to the forum and make this fun.



Am I really going to have to go on another torrent and try and trash EVERY player in the league like I did last year? It's way too easy now, I've been practicing my trash talking on Tony Gove (The ref with the porn star mustache).
Response:

Sunday Night Skate

BY: mhickey
Nov 3rd, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Hey Kelly

I would be interested and i will bring up in the lockerroom this upcoming week.
Response:

BY: scasnh
Nov 9th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


By the way, Park, is it true that eating a guys ass tastes like a rusty penny?
Response:

BY: scasnh
Nov 9th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Park, take it easy on Hads, his sperm infested ass stopped 19 tripod penalty shots Tuesday night in the most rediculous display of hockey that I have ever seen! Well, besides any time that I step on the ice, of course, that reaches a level of ridiculousness unknown by mortal man!

smurf out
Response:

Hads!

BY: kpark
Nov 9th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Hads, I know you would REALLY REALLY like that, but sorry, I'm not into that lifestyle....but it suits you very well!!!!
Response:

BY: ghadley
Nov 9th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


You can eat my ass if you would like buddie,,,,,,,,,,
Response:

CASSSSSS.........AVANT

BY: kpark
Nov 10th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


I wouldn't know, but your moms ass kind of tasted like a old chocolate bar. Oh well. Tell me how it tastes after Redden man-muscles you down town on him!


Additionally, any slack that Hadley gets is well deserved. There is actually an organization of women that Hadley gave the CLAP to that pay me for every insult I throw his way. It is amazing how much money 357 women can put together. All material used to shame Hadley has been approved by the WAGHIP (Women Against Greg Hadley's Infected Penis) group.
Response:

HA!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 12th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Ha, ha, ha, ha ha! I can't breathe! This is so fucking funny!
Response:

Thoughts on the UVHL season 4?

BY: kpark
Nov 17th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


Hey guys, I just wanted to put a thread out there to see what everyone thought of Season 4 so far? I think it has been great so far, the level of play is better than ever.
Response:

The league is great!

BY: jt
Nov 22nd, 2006 @ 12:00AM


I am so psyched that the level of competition has grown to such a level that I feel challenged every week, every shot. You really cannot take a night or even a shift off or you may find you and your team on the losing side. Thanks to everyone for making the league what it has become...great! --JT
Response:

I Totally Agree

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 23rd, 2006 @ 12:00AM


I love the league this year. I almost can't wait for playoffs, iit'll be hard to tell who'll win it all. O shit, wait a minute. The Nords are gonna win it all. En route to another Whalen Cup Victory. D-Y-N-A-S-T-Y, We have the heart to win it all. To top it all off, JT. He'll carry us when we need him. Our offense takes care of itself. The Leafs need some turnaround though. They need they're bench full, or they might as well throw Kenny right under the bus. I've really enjoyed this season so far, and I also enjoy "Bein Caught Like A Deer in the Headlights" at O.T.G. See ya on D ice Eh?
Response:

diddo

BY: kpark
Nov 28th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


UVHL....you complete me also. If it wasn't for my wife telling me that our family is the most important thing.....then the UVHL would definitely be! UVHL.....you had me at hello!!!!

Additionally, the league got much better once that poor excuse for a bloated tick, Pelletier, left for the sub-minor-b-league. And it seems as though the bitching stopped the day he left......hmmmm, very interesting. KAP OUT!
Response:

Yaaaaaaahhhh!!!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 28th, 2006 @ 12:00AM


I LOVE HOCKEY! I need to be perfectly honest here, and besides my sexxxy wife and great kids, family, closest friends and career, the UVHL is probably the next best thing in my entire life. Pathetic? No way, Hoser! The league has filled the hole in my life that was crying out for fulfillment the first 5 frickin' years I lived here in the back-ass-wards Upper Valley that had 3 rinks, no men's league, and only shinny or pick-up hockey and the 5 week "Mud League"! What the hell kind of community in a hockey hotbed doesn't have a men's league? Well, JT and I fixed that, along with Kelly Park's help! I am just so impressed with how far we have come in only 4 seasons. The quality of play has gotten better each year. The depth of the rosters continues to improve, and the bitching is getting so much better (i.e. there is so much les of it). The camaraderie is at an all-tiime high, and players on opposing teams are hanging out post-game at OTG and joking around and reminicing over a beer about the game they just played. Kelly Park isn't even one of the top 6 forwards anymore and will be lucky if he makes the 2nd team All-Star roster. JT isn't even the hands down best goalie and has two other goalies included in the conversation every week in Cote and Bartline. McDermott (me) isn't even in the top half of defensemen anymore! OUCH! JT is right, we can't even take one shift off in a game or we're going to get smoked! Even the refereeing is better, and the new USA Hockey rules have cleaned up alot of bullshit and the game is faster and cleaner than ever before! We've got 6 really good teams, 6 great captains, two awesome balding & fat commissioners, a superb super sarcastic webmaster, great Ref-In-Chief (even if he was a 70's porn star, but everyone deserves a second chance, dont'cha think?), good refs, and awesome assistant to the commish (even though his first write-ups weren't funny, kinda sucked, didn't list the goals or penalties and didn't describe the game at all, and were way to short - but good first effort nonetheless ;)... ). If I ever were to move from the Upper Valley, the UVHL is what I would defiinitely miss the most. UVHL, you complete me! 'Nuff said.
Response:

Potter Dynasty, or Potter Done?

BY: hkydoc
Nov 29th, 2006 @ 7:07PM


Who is the best team in the Upper Valley? We may never truly know. Historically speaking, I must give the imaginary title to Potter\'s 2005 Mud League team that came from behind to beat the very best Men\'s Legaue team I have ever played against in the Murphy\'s squad captained by Rick Hughes, when Will Meyer tied the game in the last two minutes and then Dan McGee scored in OT to exorcise the demons of the former Buffalo Bills of the Upper Valley after being finalists the past 4 seasons when Hartford\'s Potter Construction won their first Mud League title. BUT (I knew you could sense a BUT coming), there are several points that detract from Potter\'s success. First, they aren\'t part of the UVHL and don\'t really compete against the best hockey talent for a full season, so until they hoist the UVHL\'s Whalen Cup and not the Mud Bowl, their uncontested rule is tainted. Tuck has won a Whalen Cup, but their roster changes every year, and the Nordiques have won 2 of 3 Whalen Cups and the core of their roster is still intact from 2003-04, but none of these team\'s full rosters have ever played one another before. So, a true match-up has never before taken place. Also, the Storm Kings have never faced Potter with their full rosters intact either, and the USA Hockey National Champ Finalists from 2005-06 can put a hurtin\' on any team, and their roster is comprised of the core of that Murphy\'s team from the 2005 Mud League I mentioned earlier. Second, Potter just lost their regular Sunday night ice time in a fucked over fiasco with that son of a bitch cocksucker at the Hartford Rec Dep\'t, Tad I\'m a two faced backstabbing bastard Nunez whatever the fuck his name is, and therefore don\'t skate together regularly enough anymore. Does this mean the end for Potter Construction? Will they only play Mud League for 14 games in the spring from now on and fade into hockey obscurity with poorly attended haphazard ice times throughout the rest of the year? Is their hockey dynasty now over? Although we welcome Potter to the UVHL even for a brief 4 game stint this Nov-Dec 2006, they will not have their full roster and will not meet the Storm Kings or Tuck in their fill-in appearances due to the schedule rotation. However, we are very pleased to have them as part of the UVHL this season, if only for a brief time, and hope that it will lead to more regular appearances and involvement of this excellent squad deserving of inclusion in the conversation of the best team in the Upper Valley. For a brief moment imagine the quality and level of play in the UVHL if Potter was a full time franchise...hmmmmm....mmmmmm....MMMMMMMM.....whoops, I just blew my hockey load! Thank goodness for the splash guard on my laptop! Good Luck, Potter Construction! We hope you enjoy your UVHL stint this season, and we\'ll definitely see you for the Mud League this spring, eh!
Response:

Done huh?

BY: kpark
Dec 1st, 2006 @ 1:32PM


Wow, for the first time those guys played hockey.....it doesn't really seem as though they are done. The Nords are still gonna WHOOP up on them good in a couple of weeks. I'm gonna hip check McGee, toe drag around Barwood, triple lutz around Potter, step over Gino, do the Kansas city shuffle on Gilbault and then bury the cookie in the breadbasket on top of the top shelf behind the mayonaise and under the week old Maple Honey Ham on Obar.



Damn that is gonna be fun.
Response:

Why is the 'B' league harder than the UVHL?

BY: hkydoc
Dec 2nd, 2006 @ 8:28AM


Aaargh! What the hell!!! How could I be on the ice for all 4 goals in a 4-1 loss for the Northstars on Thursday in the UAHL 'B' league? Fat Bastard, YOU SUCK! If I cut myself from the UVHL for being too fat, old, or slow, then I'm in for it when I get assigned to the minors because I'm way worse! After several conversations with UVHLers who are doing part-time or double duty on Thursday nights we have come to the conclusion that the 'B' league is harder than the 'A' league for UVHLers. Why, you ask? Kelly Park said that he "couldn't do anything" on Thursdays even though he was "trying as hard as I can". Huh? Unless we're getting spanked by the Storm Kings in a high scoring game, I'm almost always a PLUS defenseman, NOT a MINUS! Nonetheless, I, Shawn McDermott, the Commish and Co-Founder of the 'A' league, was a pathetic minus 2 and was on for all 4 goals this past Thursday against Bigelow's team. Johnny Bigs even poke checked me on a third period rush as I was trying to create some offense (it was a nice play and I tip my hat to him). Yes, there is more time and more room to move and do things in the 'B' league, and no UVHLer has ever said that the 'B' league was bad. In fact, there are some that even prefer the UAHL to the UVHL because it is more low key and they have time to make plays and go from an average UVHLer to an above average or top UAHLer. I think it has something to do with unexpected plays that make the 'B' league more difficult. Players don't go where you'd expect. They show up to score in unlikely places and at unlikely times. More skilled or faster players are swarmed, so instead of having to beat 1 or 2 guys, you have to beat 3 or 4. Passes are made at strange times, and to weird places, and goals result! Please don't misunderstand, I mean no disrespect to any UAHLer, but his topic has been a point of discussion between many a UVHLer, and it is legit hockey news in the UV. I must say, it is fun to play on Thursday night and have a night when I'm not on duty and can just focus on having fun (not that I don't absolutely love the UVHL, because i do and it completes me a la Jerry McGuire,) but since I'm now 35 and am officially a Northstar (Sun nights and multiple Montreal tourneys), I'm gonna bring my 'A' game on Thursday nights from now on instead of holding back trying to be a gentleman and not a ringer when I sub. Maybe I'll only be a minus 1 next time.... See you on the ice, eh!



McD
Response:

BY: tonyd
Dec 2nd, 2006 @ 12:08PM


ringer??? holding back??? thats funny shit McD.

I know what your saying, after 5 thursday games I have 0 goals, can't even buy one, I hit the post at least 4 times last week. Oh well, it'll be fun beating up on my boys on the OTG squad in a few weeks anyway. Anyone know if they have the 3 penalty rule on Thursdays? Cause I'll have to get Pelletier, Hadley, Weglarz...
Response:

the "ABC's of Hockey

BY: tgove
Dec 4th, 2006 @ 10:00AM


wow I agree with Tony D on this one, a "RINGER' A-Game wow...alana please stop telling shawn lies, (well about Hockey) Tony D-There is not a 3 penalty rule on thursday, and please dont get hads and weig mad-ya know what happened last time they were mad? from what I hear Hads head looked like a rockem sockem robot. Oh shawn will be covering news similar to the AHL with who got sent down to the minor leagues and for whay next....
Response:

Checking in from Sweden!

BY: kpark
Dec 6th, 2006 @ 6:46AM


Hey guys, our little buddy from Sweden emailed the UVHL last night with the info below:

Name: Marcus "Swedie" Eriksson
Email: ericson_marcus@hotmail.com
Phone:

Comments: hey guy´s.
I hope all you guy\'s will have a great season.
Say hi to everyone, I miss the games.
I hade a really fun season last year, and I´m kind of bumd about not playing with you guy´s this year.
I hope that I can come back to the U.S. soon, I really miss the country and the people.

To end this I just wanna wish you all Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!!!

Response:

Bruins add some depth and girth w/ 230lb eckler

BY: ghadley
Dec 6th, 2006 @ 9:49AM


With the bruins still struggling on D with the absence of BIG DADDYJessiman who was tradeed in a player to be named later to the Maryland Hockey League 2 weeks ago, have invited former KUA All STAR and B Leaguer Eric Eckler (a true 230 lbs of twisted stool) to a one day try out. Eric's manager BUD LIGHT has told ESPN he been trying to get back into game shape the last few weeks while drinking heavily 2-3 nights a week and playing for the wise guys in the B league. Sources close to the player went on record to say a one game contract was signed late last night around 1ish after the player and manager of the Bruins were envolved in some Pool playing at the OTG. There were witnesses saying BEER could been the desiding factor but both Eric's manager and Bruins GM have not returned any calls this am to the league as of 12 Noon.
Response:

BRUINS TRADE rumor?????

BY: ghadley
Dec 6th, 2006 @ 9:56AM


Last night after the B's loss a conversation was over heard in the locker room (by a player who's not willin to go public) that the Bruins are in talks to trade warren and Smith for a case of BUD. Sources told ESPN that it was so quite after the bruins loss that you could even hear a BUD can being opened. We will keep you updated on any news as it comes in............
Response:

Good luck Eric

BY: kpark
Dec 6th, 2006 @ 6:58PM


I would just like to welcome Mr. Eckler to the UVHL, and wish him the best of luck. Mainly because he is going to need it playing in front of Greg "WAGHIP" Hadley. The best way to win a game with Hads in net is to limit the opposing team to 3 shots a game.

Sincerely,

Kelly
Response:

Trade time.

BY: kpark
Dec 6th, 2006 @ 7:00PM


Half way through the season is the perfect time to cut some DEAD weight. I heard the Maple Leafs are going to cut their entire team and only play with Kenny Lallier in net.........I bet he'd do better without the useless bodies screening him.

GO LEAFS!!!!
Response:

Marty White is up for P.O.W?!?!?

BY: kpark
Dec 9th, 2006 @ 3:06PM


What has this league come to? Old man White had 1 goal and 5 assists? For awhile I thought the league was getting better each year, but apparently NOT. Just kidding Marty, great game the other night.
Response:

Congratulations to Tommy Scull

BY: kpark
Dec 12th, 2006 @ 9:00PM


I would first off like to congratulate my good friend, Tom Scull for losing the title of "Cheapest Player In the UVHL". Additionally, I would like to congratulate the NEWEST winner of the award, fellow Storm Kings defenseman, Artie Stout.......congratulations Artie, you truly deserve it.

I would also like to congratulate Kingers forward, Adam Hogg for completely and utterly embarrassing the Nordiques tonight with 10 points, 6 goals & 4 assists, in an 11-5 THRASHING. I have never felt like a bigger bag of shit out on the ice as I watched him and Sean Coakley skate circles around me and my team.

Congrats Kingers, great game.
Response:

NEW EQUIPMENT CHANGES FOR UVHL BULLET PROOF VESTS

BY: ghadley
Dec 15th, 2006 @ 9:49AM


As we all know there a few dirty players that are currently playing in the UVHL.. But Saturday Night in a non sanctioned UVHL game that was taking place in Bridgewater around 12:30 AM are favorite bartender Tracey ( the one with the breasts we all stair at all night) took THE CHEAP SHOT OF one step further by using a 9mm... thats right 9mm to the chest of her boyfirend... The wrap up hadn't been sent to the UVHL office by press time tuesday but was in the sports pages of the Rutland Herald Sunday's Edition. So as the Capt of the Bruins I recommend we look into the equipment change asap for all post events at the OTG.... and never piss off your local bartenders either.................
Response:

My favorite Swede!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 15th, 2006 @ 6:55PM


Marcus! Nice to hear from you, you cherry picker! We miss you and your Europoean style and grace in our North American dump and chase beer league. Hope you are having a great time wherever you are, and know you are always welcome to put on a UVHL jersey next time you come to visit us, skate on our ice, drink our beer, score on our goalies, violate our women, and smoke our cigarettes. Love Fat Bastard, The Commish, Shawn McDermott.
Response:

They deserved it.

BY: hkydoc
Dec 15th, 2006 @ 6:59PM


We had 9 players, they had 9 players, and they beat us fair and square, even kicked our ass en route to a new UVHL record 10-point game by Adam "McPuck" Hogg. Congrats, eh! Nice game Kingers. See you in the playoffs!
Response:

WOW

BY: kpark
Dec 16th, 2006 @ 10:42AM


Hadley, look down.......do you see that line you just crossed?!?!? Wow, you really know how to set the tone of an email. I would just like to point out that the original cheap shot came from Tracey's boyfriend as the rumor is that he was both mentally & physically abusive. The last srtaw came when he threw her down a flight of stairs on Saturday night.

In my opinion, the prick got what he deserved. That just goes to show you that you may want to treat your girl friend's and wives better.

I throw my wife down the stairs all the time, but it is kind of a foreplay thing for us! SHE LOVES IT!!!!!

Hadley, I can't believe you told us that you love taking it from behind from Pelletier. That was kind of weird.
Response:

No Faith in the Nords McD?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 24th, 2006 @ 7:34PM


I'm really not impressed by the lack of faith our Commish has in the Nords. I agree the Pole Smokers, I mean Storm Kings have shown some added offensive power as of late. However, the Nords have taken two of three this season. The last meeting WAS very embarassing though. Hogg ripped our defense a new cornhole, and Coakley skated around the net waiting to feed his favorite target. The Nords will prove the non-believers wrong in the playoffs, and repeat as Whalen Cup champs. I cannot guarantee this, but I can say we will show the Kingers what the Nords are all about next time out. Old time hockey baby!!!
Response:

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 24th, 2006 @ 7:39PM


Oh, and everyone have a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! Fuck the politically correct idiots, Its Merry Christmas, not Happy Holidays. I'll come right out and say it, If you want to celebrate Hannukah, Kwaaanza, Festivus or whatever. Don't try to change everyone else's traditions they've grown up with. That's it I said it. Call me what you will, but I tell it like it is, MARSHY!!!!!
Response:

I LOVE OUR TEAM!!!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 1st, 2007 @ 8:55AM


Marshy, I must start by saying that I LOVE OUR TEAM. We've got it all going on - great roster, great locker room, awesome jerseys (well, maybe not, but they aren't as bad as everyone else is saying, and they're growing on me), success as a team, team hats & team shirts thanks to Poli, a superstar goalie, and lots of fun. This is what the UVHL is all about, and every team should be so lucky as the Nords - to play and win with your friends. However, as much faith as I have in our team, I have seen the league grow and improve since 2003-04, and I must turn an objective eye when I put on my Commish Hat and say that we aren't the best team. Yeah, we're in first place, but Tuck has the deepest roster, and when we play the Storm kings, flip a coin because either team can win and it is about who plays their team game better. Last time they did, and in force, too. You're only as good as your last game, and although we barely beat a depleted Potter line-up in a shootout last game, the game before that we got creamed by the Kingers. Now we lose Pete "PokeCheck" Otto, my D partner, as the second half of the season is underway, Tuck returns, and the Whalen Cup Playoffs loom. Do we still have enough to repeat? Do I believe in our team? HELL YEAH! GO NORDS! (but I'm not guaranteeing anything, only our A-game, and may the best team win!)
Response:

ANY ONE SEEN MISS GOVE?

BY: ghadley
Jan 3rd, 2007 @ 8:33AM


In case any of you didn't see the post game activities after game 1,,,, tough guy and wanna be zebra TONY GOVE actually had the kahonnes to finally go toe to toe to to with the twisted steel # 39 and ummmmm got his ass beaten,,,,,ask him how the ice tastes OHHHHHHHHHHHHHH that must hurt ,,,,,Actually you might want to retire from fighting miss gove at least in the A league..... or at least pick your fights with the turtle so you can at least tell your kids you won........ but the B league plays thursdays if you feel you need a rematch I'll be skating out thursday and without goalie pads... OUCH thats right I had my goalie stuff on. too........................
Response:

RESPONSE

BY: tgove
Jan 3rd, 2007 @ 12:07PM


Lets see? I think first I will admit that I now am 8-1-0, yes the first loss. maybe at the point that your shirt came over your head did I think I had the fight to my advantage, but if you were not so dam FAT that you wear a size 80 shirt (yes fat not steel) that tying up your arms would have been done. I can take the ass whippen like a man. but atleast when I pick a fight its a fight not something out of a cartoon (turtle & rabbit) by calling me a MISS & wanna be ref you must want another shot, dont you think you won or are you not sure? oh its only round 1 baby.and I wont have my brother kick your ass like the last guy.
keep your head up!!!!
Response:

There has been a Miss GOVE sighting

BY: dfitts
Jan 5th, 2007 @ 3:07PM


There may have been a Miss Gove sighting in the middle of the first game. Does she have a porn star mustache and where stripes? I think it was Miss Gove who was throwing out long time Leafs tough guy Fred Redden from the game and the next game from across the ice?????
Response:

I cannot say I've seen it

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 5th, 2007 @ 4:58PM


However I will say that if the shit goes down, I'm with Hadley. Tony " The Rubber Glove" Gove, decided to side with his own boy-toy Chris Johnson, and toss me in the SinBin for our shootout against The Avs. Please tell me Tony WHATIDO? By the way, I'd really love to put my own "Lyndon Byers" impression on CJ, but I guess I'll have to wait for the rematch. Way to go Hads, Love Ya Kid! MARSHY!!
Response:

What the hell happened?

BY: hkydoc
Jan 6th, 2007 @ 6:17PM


Hey, what did I miss on Thursday in the B league? Did Tony finally make his UAHL debut as a player and get sent home after a scrap with Hads? I'm Switzerland on the whole thing, by the way...The Commish.
Response:

Campion, oh Campion where art thou?

BY: pb
Jan 16th, 2007 @ 11:46AM


I don't know if anyone else noticed this, but it has only been one week since Jay "The Puck Poet" Campion's absence from the Avs lineup and McDermott has already moved in on his turf. Did you read this week's game sheet??? If you haven't read it yet, methinks you should. He has his tounge so far up Bayley's ass that he must have tasted the mac and cheese Bayls ate today at lunch. Let me ask you this Commish, how does your wife put up with your two other girlfriends, Meyer and Bayley?
Response:

It's Getting Sick!!

BY: mhickey
Jan 16th, 2007 @ 2:13PM


Well said; it is amazing how far he climb up in there.
Response:

McDermott and McSelfish long lost brothers?

BY: jt
Jan 21st, 2007 @ 7:39AM


The similarities are stunning- country of origin, skill, swagger, rugged good looks... Should we consider a genetic link between the two UVHLers? Perhaps the medical students could start a clinical study to uncover the truth?!
Response:

Mmmmmm, Kraft dinner!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 21st, 2007 @ 11:08PM


Hey, non-hoser! Don't cha know that we Canucks call macaroni and cheese KRAFT DINNER? And by the way, McSelfish likes his with ketchup on it! About time you chimed in on the Forum, Bartline! You can't study that vagina picture all day, now can you? This way you can jerk off at the back of the class while quietly chanting "Manon...Manon...oh...oh, Manon!" in a French-Canadian accent while looking at your Forum photo. Don't forget the splash guard!

P.S. This was some funny shit you sparked, eh! Bayley and I could be twins! Like Schwarzenneger and DeVito!
Response:

Where oh where????IS ARE WHALEN CUP

BY: Whalen
Jan 24th, 2007 @ 11:35AM


The Whalen cup is the Trophy for one team to enjoy at the end of a long season of Hockey & Nights out with the Boys.
From Union Arena to Off the Green for Beer---Start looking for the cup, Who knows if its near!
To Hockey Players W/ Attitudes & Refs W/ Questionable Calls Over the Quechee Gorge the cup it may Fall.
The cup is alive and well, It Didn't fall over the gorge-Cant you tell. Although it has lost where its supposed to be W/The UVHL
From Woodstock to Quechee to Shawns office the cup it has appeared, No one including JT & Hadley know if the cup is far or near.
So keep your eyes open for the next place the Whalen Cup will appear.
Response:

Peter Bartline, too cocky?

BY: Bartline=God
Jan 26th, 2007 @ 10:51AM


I found these quotes from Messr. Bartline from an old Holy
Cross hockey article. Who does this kid think he is?

"If we win these big games our chances of going to nationals will skyrocket. Do any of these games scare me? No. Let me tell you why. PB loves to play. There I said it, I don't care who's on the other side of the ice, as long as there is a game going I don't care if I'm playing against the Tampa Bay Lighting or the Mighty Ducks. "

"Wow, supurb question outta you. Well last year's was pretty standard issue, "Crazy Train", "Let's Get Ready to Rumble", "These Boots Are Made for Walking", you know, guys stuff. This year we're trying to get a little more modern, a little more plugged in. Were gonna start off with a classic "Black Betty" by Ram Jam, followed by "Don't Stop Believing" by Journey, that is my jam this year BTW. Then were gonna, kinda "MTV2" it a little bit, "Banquet" by Bloc Party, "Robot Rock" by Daft Punk and finally "Come Into My World" by Kylie Minogue, that last one will really get the fans going or really confuse the other team. Either way it works for me."

"CCAISP: Really bold stuff outta you guys this year. Now I understand you have a bit of a soft spot for chemistry is that true?

PB: You got me. Chemistry is once of my vices, the other two? Jagermeister and silk. I just can't help myself. But yes chemistry is phenomenal, I get to use a laser, it's really a hoot. "

Brass ones on this kid.
Response:

He's not scared!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 27th, 2007 @ 6:39PM


Wow, Bartline's got some huge balls in his silk thong there, eh? Looks like the trash talk is only beginning! Have you read my reply on the other Forum posting yet, Mr. Macaroni & Cheese? Methinks you should! Nice game last week, it got you a Player of the Week nomination. Make sure Mom & Dad, Grandma & Grandpa, your best friend, former teammates, and ex-girlfriends all get out and vote. Somebody's got to send McSelfish back down to earth, or his huge head won't fit into Union Arena on Tuesday. McD out!
Response:

Who is fucking with me now?

BY: hkydoc
Jan 27th, 2007 @ 6:43PM


What the fuck? The last time I went on a damn scavenger hunt there was a prize involved, tits at the end of the rainbow, and copious amounts of beer. If the fuckhead who took Whalen Cup # 2 actually had any balls, they would have delivered it to my face and apologised. Instead, they decide to fuck us, again, with after JT and I spend another $250.00 on Whalen Cup # 3. Fuck you you spineless pussy. When I find out who you are it won't be pretty.

McD
Response:

Fat Bastard career worst Minus-9 in Coaches vs. Cops game!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 28th, 2007 @ 7:09AM


It can only get better from here on. Fat Bastard, aka Shawn McDermott, the Commish of the UVHL, had his career worst game ever this past Friday night at Hartford Arena in the charity game of the Hartford Coaches vs. the Vermont Enforcers, a travel/tournament team of VT state troopers and local police officers. The game started a stirring American Idol-type rendition of the Star Spangled Banner by two of McD's Hartford girls under-12 players, Allyse Mullen and Erin Hudson, who belted out the anthem with passion and fervor! Unfortunately, their rendition was the highlight for the Hartford fans on this frickin' freezing night. The cops pounded the thrown together team of coaches 11-6, and McDermott not only scored a brilliant goal on his own net to start the second period, he was a cumulative MINUS-9 for the game, on the ice for 9 of 11 cop goals and none of his own team's tallys. McDermott tried to rally the coaches in between the first and second period down 5-3 with a stirring locker room speech saying that "we need to start this period fast, and the first goal is going to be HUGE!". McDermott circle back off the opening face-off and took the puck into his own end down the right side looking for Scott Shaw cross-ice, who instructed the D to find him up high on the left wing so he could "beat the tripod defense on my side". Ever heard the expression of "Do as I say, not as I do"? Fat Bastard executed those words of wisdom to a tee when he threw the puck towards a wide open Shaw across the front of his own net as he streaked down beside his own goal. Stupid, stupid, stupid! The puck richoched off his teammate in front and into his own net. I think the centerman on the Enforcers got credit for the goal because McD scored that HUGE goal very early on his self-fulfilling prophecy quick start to the period. It was a split-second decision, and not a good one, and there were no Enforcers in the way of the pass that, if it got through, would have sent Shaw on a near breakaway. Alas, Stupid Bastard screwed it up just like a squirt his first time playing D, and is sure to hear about it from his young defensive proteges on Saturday morning!

However, to put this just for fun charity game in perspecitve in this self-abusive article, Hartford's Scott Shaw had 4G, 1A for the coaches and still finished in the minus. Its almost impossible for a team to compete, even for fun, when you're thrown together in the locker room before the game and expect any semblance of a team game, even from highly trained and elite coaches such as ourselves. Regardless of the stats, this was a fun game to participate in, and I'm looking forward to next year's edition! The Enforcers played with class and style, and had at least 3 players good enough for the UVHL. One defenseman, a Jarome Iginla look-like, moved the puck very well and scored a few goals from the point on slappers. McDermott's trash talk pre-game was that "nobody was going to beat me". Wrong. Prediction failed. He got beat twice, by the same cop, the one in the blue helmet, once to the outside, and once through the legs at the very end of the game that made McD look like a fat pylon. Oops, eh. Dave Bouthillier was the other scoring threat for the coaches, and on a line with Shaw the two had speed, puck control, and chemistry. The two even connected for two shortys while Ben Robbins was in the box for tripping, and the coaches should have changes strategeries and taken more penalties since they played much better 4-on-5! McD was reunited with former UVHL Nordique Robbins on the blueline, who made UVHL history after he scored the go-home goal for the first ever Whalen Cup in the OT shootout in the inaugural 2003-04 season, and the two worked well together controlling the play in the coaches' end and feeding Boots and Shaw with nice precision passes threading the needle several times though the Enforcers. Most of the goals against were scored on screens due to lack of coordination and communication between the coaches, and there really isn't much you can do about that. John Alvord got a little testy after he perceived a cheap shot from one of the cops and went after the player again and again after the play was over looking for a fight! Alvord was escorted off the ice by the refs and sent to the locker room, lamenting and banging his stick the entire way. Fortunately it didn't get too stupid, and nobody was hurt. Even so, in the locker room after it was all over, McD bestowed upon himself the game's illustrious LVP award, a well deserved honor for his defensive lack of prowess and own goal!

Post-game at Than Wheeler's in classy downtown WRJ, McD had a fat defenseman conference with his "husky" counterpart on the cops team, and even bought his opponents a round of beers. The post-game banter was alive and well, as was the camaraderie. Enforcer's forward, # 11 Walt Langille, can now have his daughter, Mary Kate, say to her good friend Colleen McDermott (my daughter) that "My Dad's a better hockey player better than your Dad! Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!" Great game cops! Thanks for coming out, eh! Send us some Trash Talk on the Forum at www.uvhl.com/home.php , and if you ever want to come to Union Arena to play a UVHL squad, just say the word!

McD.
Response:

CALL/DONT CALL? CALL BUT NOT ON ME (suggested reading)

BY: tgove
Jan 28th, 2007 @ 9:59AM


lets see, first its call the standard, then its loosen up a little, then its tighten up, oh but dont call anything on ME. (because of course I didnt commit a penalty) you guys want a league but really you dont want officials to officiate it or atleast not call things against you. you want a tight game but you want to be able to play.
Does this sound confusing to you? of course because it is exactly the way you have acted the entire year. Oh I agree there have been faults in the way I myself have called a game, maybe because I am confused by the way the players want the game called or maybe on many nights I get a little distracted by the ABUSE I have recieved from some players, NOT ALL.
I can say that the abuse of official rule will be in full power for the remainder of the season and when you get a 2 min penalty my advice is right or wrong in your mind you just serve it. Or maybe you might want to go to off the green early! In that case just come ask, Hell I will send ya during warm ups. Any time any player would like we will provide you with a rule book to see the penalty that was called on you (in between games) If it becomes that your goal tender gets thrown or a misconduct , he will serve that penalty no matter, That is probably the biggest mistake I have made all season and I promise it wont happen twice. again I will show you the book, its simple its a penalty not the same as a sentance like sadam. ask the guest from cardigan how he felt the other night when the F-bombs were flying all around the rink, Oh you will have to go to cardigan to ask him as he quoted he will not make another visit to the A-league. or maybe ask the children in the stands--oh wait that was there DAD throwing them, How proud they must have been of Daddy....enough said play on!!
Response:

Old Time Hockey?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 28th, 2007 @ 6:42PM


Guys, let's get serious for a second here. I can totally understand some players point of view when it comes to the calls or non-calls on the ice. Certain players that are repeat offenders, and the instigators of many on-ice incidents should be more susceptable to a penalty. The other night in the Nords-Pole Smokers , oh sorry, Storm Kings game, a few select Kingers might as well have been playing full -contact hockey out there. I really don't want to name any names, but I will tell you for sure, the next time the Nords play the Storm Kings there will be a different tone right from the get-go! I was disgusted to hear Frenchy, yes Frenchy yell out, "All we want is to play by the same rulebook" deny it or not Frenchy, your team has a lot of skill, but you also have some of the dirtiest fucking players at times. I was almost run completely from behind into the boards, and voiced my disgust immediately. That was putting it mildly. I know the game got a little out of hand, but if you guys would like to play this style of hockey, waddayasay we just tell Tony and Carl to sit our game out? Yeah, I didn't think so. See you guys on the Ice, and keep your head up!
Response:

Yeah, Marshy, you go, Guy!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 28th, 2007 @ 11:12PM


'Nuff said, Marshy! read the write-ups, eh!
Response:

Beware UVHLers!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 28th, 2007 @ 11:28PM


Commish here, and after a phone conference with my esteemed Ref-In-Chief this weekend, we remain resolute to maintain the high USA Hockey standards, with only minor modifications to adapt these rule standards to adult hockey. Keep your yaps shut, or you're going home. Simple as that. Don't bodycheck, don't touch other players with your stick on the body or arms, and don't take a penalty personally. Stop being so sensitive, you pussies! Its just a penalty, and not the end of the world. If you make it personal with the refs, then you make it personal with the league, and that is un-cool. Tony manned-up on some of his errors, and I suggest that we all do the same. The ref-player banter during game play will be cooled off, and there will be much fewer missed offsides, icings, and penalty calls. JT and I have instructed the refs to call the stick work tighter, the bodychecking, and the mouthing off directed at the refs. We will tolerate a mild bellyaching, but nothing more, and nothing personal. They're just doing their job, and we're just trying to have some fun while we play some competitive hockey before we're all over the hill.
Response:

Nicely put Mr. Gove

BY: kpark
Feb 6th, 2007 @ 6:10AM


Yeah boys, you only make it worse by bitching and moaning. There is no way that a ref will catch everything that goes on out there, especially since the league keeps getting faster. They WILL occassionally make the wrong call, but that is life.



Live with it, deal with it, shut your mouth and go to the box. The worst thing you can do is piss off the ref by bitching at him. That doesn't help out your case, nor your teams.



All of the refs are actually good guys and will listen to you, especially after the game ends. That is if you can get past Gove's porn star mustache. Oh and cut them some slack, there is a reason they aren't reffing in the NHL!!! OUCH!!!



Kelly
Response:

CJ the Center of our Hockey Universe

BY: mhickey
Feb 7th, 2007 @ 6:38AM


Well the Nord's wanted it bad they wanted to beat the new look Avs worst than any win they will get all year. They for sure deserved the win they worked harder than any and all of our skaters all but our rock between the pipes. PB put on a clinic and JT has atested to the fact the PB was shocking!!!
But the big question for that amazing UVHL goalie is; when and how did Chris Johnson fill the five hole in that big hockey heart of yours? How did Chris become your favorite forward? Why have you choosen him to be the teamate you would most like to spend a weekend away with?
The really big question the one that all UVHLers and Avalanche Players want to know the answer to Pete is; when did Chris Johnson become the centerman that is the center of your HOCKEY UNIVERSE? Pete please let us know we are dying to know what is it that CJ has besides the clogged up brain filter.
Response:

Win or lose, CJ is happy with his game!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 7th, 2007 @ 9:54PM


No matter if the Avs win or lose, CJ always has something nice to say about HIS game, and something not so nice to say about someone else's game. My favorite story is Al's version, and I will not bastardize it by trying to recount it here - you'll just have to have Al tell it to you in person, because it is that funny! I've heard it 7 times and I laugh every time! To CJ's credit though, he has really toned it down and has been a pleasure to have in the league this season. He is this year's nominee for "Most Improved Sportsmanlike" Player. And hey, so what that the Nords (us) beat you on Tuesday...did you see how well Johnson played?!!! He had a GREAT game, even though the rest of you guys SUCKED ASS! Just ask him, he'll tell you!
Response:

CJ should put on the goal pads

BY: jt
Feb 11th, 2007 @ 9:46AM


Bartline was awesome in the game, period! In the few times that I played for the Aves, CJ has been critical of my play. I think it is hard for players who don't play the position to understand how difficult it is. Some games you feel great, you're in position and you still get beat. The ones that hit the post and go wide are finding the net instead. I think it's time for CJ to put on the pads and step into Bartline's skates. Maybe after Turco scores 9 goals in the first period, he'll appreciate PB's mad skills! --JT
Response:

Who is the Brain Surgeon?

BY: kpark
Feb 15th, 2007 @ 1:29PM


In case you all haven't heard about the TRAGEDY that has fallen upon the UVHL this past Tuesday night, it appears that along with Wallets, Car Keys and personal beloingings.......our BEER is no longer safe at the Union arena. Apparently a group of teenage THUGS broke their way into the locker rooms to steal a couple hundred of the UVHLers beers.



My question is this.....who is the idiot that reported to the rink guy that they had 130 beers stolen from their locker room? While you were at it, you probably should have called the police about your beer being stolen from a locker room inside a community rink located on school property!!!!



The rink guy then came to the Commishes and said, WHAT THE HELL IS A TEAM OF 12 guys doing with 130 beers? And secondly, NEVER tell the rink guy you have beers.



Hopefully the fact that you didn't have your beers will let you sober up long enough to see the error of your ways.

Kelly
Response:

Beer myth/urban legend @ Union Arena

BY: hkydoc
Feb 15th, 2007 @ 2:09PM


Commish here. In fact, there were no beers stolen from Union Arena because there are no beers allowed on school grounds (read your UVHL Waiver again , eh), except when the Bruins Alumni come to town, and then Chris Nilan can drink and smoke in the locker room all he wants because nobody is going to tell him to stop.
Response:

PB: the greatest sniper since Ronnie Hextall??

BY: pb
Feb 16th, 2007 @ 9:30AM


Now I will star this out by saying that goaltenders are a vain bunch. Why else would one strap on the pads game after game only to get pelted with pucks and sun-burned by a little red light mounted over our heads? Well, first and foremost, chicks dig the splits. But aside from that, we play goal bc we know we look good. And along with this vanity over our appearance comes an obsession with our stats. And currently sitting with a sub-stellar 4.00 GAA, the only solace I can take from my debut UVHL season statline are the 2 GOALS that I seemed to have amassed this season. Despite my sweet puck handling skills and dazzling sauce-passes, I must concede that I have not in fact sniped 2 g's... I have somehow managed to chisel them from that selfish prick bastard Nick Bayley. I suggest that the co-commishes remedy this situation for several reasons. One is that leaving them with me will inflate my ego so large that it will be declared as illegal equipment and I will be barred from playoffs. Second is that Bayley has been threatening my life bc those two goals are crucial to his spot in the tight UVHL scoring race... can you believe that?? Methinks the claims made about his selfishness are well founded. Regardless, those two goals should be given back to him. Or maybe CJ wants to claim them, he seems to be the only one more interested in his personal stats than Bayley.

Response:

BY: bayley
Feb 16th, 2007 @ 11:07AM


Friends of the UVHL and fans across the country,

Let me clear the waters that continue to be muddied by the likes of PB and the Commish, regarding the quality of my character.

Unlike Pete "UVHL.com is my homepage" Bartline, I do not spend the first two hours of class everyday checking for the latest game updates, crafting witty fan forum posts, and asking the nerds beside me to "calculate what my new GAA will be after holding the Storm Kings to 2 goals last night." While PB makes falsified claims to our fellow UVHLers about me requesting my 2 goals back, I am diligently listening to a lecture on the herpes virus - the vary virus responsible for the sporadic outbreaks of warts on PB's underdeveloped genitalia.

I can't help but wonder, where did this "McSelfish" name come from in the first place? Let me briefly list a case why I am unfit for the title:

1) Its not my fault Christian "my hands are only good for attacking people" Isaac can't put the puck in the net. What does he want me to do, shoot it for him too? Apparently, the size of one’s biceps is not an indicator of one's ability to finish a 2 on 1...otherwise I'd be rocking 70 apples to compliment my 50 some odd g's.

2) How can you call a man selfish who shares himself so selflessly with numerous females of the Dartmouth community? #21 has more freshman girlfriends than UVHL goals this year. Nuff said.

3) Commish, it doesn't take a smart man to notice that "McSelfish" and Will "The 2nd Coming Of Jesus" Meyer have eerily similar stat lines. To be precise, they share the same number of assists. But while a statue of Meyer is being commissioned to be placed outside Union Arena for the start of '07-'08 UVHL campaign, Bayley is slammed week after week for being a "selfish" player. Other than Bayley's dashing good looks, the only difference between the two is Meyer's tendency to fist pump after scoring the 7th goal from behind the net in a 7-2 game. Methinks something fishy could be going on during shower time between McDermott and Meyer. Sure I don't block shots with my face like Meyer, or enter the defensive zone at all for that matter, but the stats don't lie - if I'm guilty, so is your boy toy Meyer.


Lastly, in an unrelated note, this website is fantastic. Kelly Park is the real Commish in my books.

Response:

Too funny

BY: kpark
Feb 16th, 2007 @ 2:07PM


Hey guys, that was too fucking funny. Baylay, if you were so unselfish, how come non of the 30-some-odd freshman girls have not been invited to Woodstock on Tuesday nights partake in any type of debauchery or shenanigans?!?!? Now a true "Unselfish" individual would share!!!


Pete, you are truly an unselfish team mate. I will correct the two goals that you did not receive and add them to Baylay's stats, which will actually put him as the points leader for the 2006-2007 season. Well deserved as well.


Nick, I do appreciate the comments about the website and your vote for me as the commissioner, but I'm not sure that being a geek with too much time on his hands and zero hockey skills would win that honor for me. On the other hand I do have MAD WIFFLE BALL SKILLZZZZZZ!!!!



See you guys in the playoffs!
Response:

How am I supposed to hate this guy?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 16th, 2007 @ 2:27PM


First of all, maybe HATE is too strong a word. The fact the the Blue Helmet Boys are Canadian is one, Second Dr. McSelfish really has only a few options to go to. Other than a select few teammates, in my eyes , he really has no choice but to "Take It To The House". And that he really does. No one can take away the fact he has one of, if not the best offensive skills in the league. My boy Meyer though has HEART! Nobody, contrary to CJ's opinion gets physically molested on the ice more than Meyer. Yet he continues to drive it down the throats of every single team, night after night. I really think that the playoffs will tell the tale if Dr McSelfish can elevate his teammates to a level of toughness and tenacity, they will need to get past not only the Nords, but the Pole Smokers, sorry Storm Kings as well. I myself can't wait to see who'll have to face us in the playoffs, whoever it is, I know it'll be ROCK'EM SOCK'EM Hockey, Grapes would love that !!!!!
Response:

Ooooooh! You hurt my feelings!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 16th, 2007 @ 3:57PM


About fucking time you boys started screwing around in class a little more and add a UVHL Forum blog or two! They still call you doctor when you graduate, assholes, whether you're first or last in the class y'know (that was my philosophy anyway...).

Bartline - You suuuure look purdy in those purple legwarmers while you do the splits. I heard your boyfriend likes it when you do the splits... How come you didn't mention the assists you had? Maybe the 2 goals were assists, I know I saw at least one assist to your credit this year. Now you're outscoring half your team AND keeping all but 4.00 goals per game out of the net! Welcome the men's league stats, eh. It takes a goalie time to adjust to a GAA double what he/she is used to. Are there any other egregious errors that we need to address for you, Your Highness, the purple Princess Pete between the pipes?

Bayley - Don't fuck with Meyer, he is the golden boy and you are a selfish bastard! At least Will tries to pass, you just get a pass from Dr. McBiceps and deke out 3 guys for the goal without feeding it back to him (sooooo predictable...). Actually, if the 2 goals are yours, then you're welcome to them. The scoring race is a tight one, so you had better be EXTRA selfish this coming Tuesday night so you can wear the Season 4 scoring corwn, because you know that Hogger could light it up for another 8 or 10 point night against the Leafs! So have the freshman hotties helped you forget about Mrs. McSelfish? She is the one I got all the dirt from anyway! A good writer never reveals his source! Well, almost never...

But seriously, you three have been AWESOME additions to the league this year, and the Avs success is in large part due to you, and you have made the league better. even if you are selfish bastards!

McD
Response:

Look out for Dr. McSelfish!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 16th, 2007 @ 8:29PM


If anyone besides Will meyer can win a game all on his own, it is Nick bayley, aka Dr. McSelfish. He has won more than two games for the Avs in the waning minutes of a game, so don't count out the Avs even if you have a 2 goal lead! Still...he hasn't beat me 1-on-1 yet...
Response:

Huh?

BY: kpark
Feb 18th, 2007 @ 6:17PM


Hate is not a strong enough word. More like DESPISE WITH A RANCID PASSION. Just kidding Baylay. Marshy, I love the Grapes reference. GO NORDS!!!!
Response:

Man up to the truth Rink Rat!!!!!!

BY: hadley
Feb 20th, 2007 @ 9:30AM


Kelly what side of the rink was the beer stolen from??? If it''s the shower side your theory makles alot of sense.. however it happened again saturday night and the NEW ice scraper rink rat guy might be the culprit. But this person also went into zipped up bags and took beer out of there as well. Now we all no the rule but if it's the rink doing this they could have given us a warning considering every rink mgr this place has had has always kind of looked away on this subject. including the 3 players that I know have a one or two at the rink that happen to be on the board of the rink. Vic was confronted on saturday by a few players and seemed to take the fifth. and when the NEW rink rat was asked he said he didn't know what we were talking about. Now I understand the rule but who is the real culprit here?????????????? Only the beer thief knows so come own up to it !!!!
Response:

Thoughts on the New Website Design!??!

BY: kpark
Feb 22nd, 2007 @ 9:34AM


Hey guys, I just posted the new website design about 30 minutes ago and wanted to know what you all thought about it. There are some NEW cool features in here such as:



- New Team Pages with Logos

- New Players page with Random Profile & Top Viewed Players

- Headshots for players

- New Long Trail POW page. Free case of beer for the winner.



If you have a headshot that you want to put up on the site, email it to me at: kpark@parkcreative.com



Let me know if there is anything else that you want on the site. I'm a geek and live for this SHIT!!!!
Response:

For Sure you are a Geek

BY: mhickey
Feb 22nd, 2007 @ 10:04AM


Hey Kelly
It looks great, I love the new POW page and I am sure it makes Brian Walsh happy. Have you heard has anyone ever picked up their free Case of Long Trail.

I asking if you've heard because I know you'd never win those honors.

By the way wheres your headshot.
Response:

Long Trail

BY: mhickey
Feb 22nd, 2007 @ 10:08AM


If no one has picked up their POW beer maybe we should prees Brian to provide all the non collected cases for an end of the year UVHL party.
Response:

Hell of an idea

BY: kpark
Feb 22nd, 2007 @ 10:17AM


Thanks Hickey. I'm digging the new clean design. And unfortunately, you are right, I will NEVER win one of those POWs. I do agree that we have a nice UVHL shin dig at end of year with free beer!!! I LOVE FREE LONG TRAIL!!!
Response:

Vegas?

BY: Freeze 19
Feb 22nd, 2007 @ 2:40PM


JT, KPark,

Are you guys heading out to Vegas again this year for the National Tourney?
Response:

I don't think we are going to

BY:
Feb 22nd, 2007 @ 2:45PM


Hey Freeze, I don't think we're gonna make it this year. How about you guys?
Response:

BY: Freeze 19
Feb 22nd, 2007 @ 2:46PM


Yeah, we're heading out there again. We have a different team this year though.
Response:

Wish we could

BY: kpark
Feb 22nd, 2007 @ 3:11PM


I actually think I'm still sobering up from Vegas. I think alot of the guys said that it was a blast, and we'll do it again in the future, but it is too much to go back to back.

How's the new team looking?
Response:

Did You say FREE BEER?????

BY: sfras
Feb 22nd, 2007 @ 4:32PM



Hey whats this free beer thing? I love free beer. Where do I pick it up?
Response:

outstanding

BY: bayley
Feb 22nd, 2007 @ 5:29PM


Two thumbs up from me, Kelly. This website is fantastic! Welp, there goes Bartline's anatomy grade...he'll be on this thing 4 hours per day now instead of his usual 2. I like how the forum is easy to access, right off the homepage. Hopefully it will lead to some more chatter / chirping of McDermott (and his slowest feet in the league).

Well done buddy, like I said before...the real commish in my books.

See you in the playoffs!

Go Avs
Response:

Look out Bayley

BY: pb
Feb 22nd, 2007 @ 8:41PM


Watch yourself Bayley- with that fancy new profile pic of yours, the Commish will most likely step up his obsession with you verrrrrrrry soon. Who knows, you might get what you've always wanted: to become the new Meyer in his eyes.
Response:

Could be......

BY: kpark
Feb 22nd, 2007 @ 8:49PM


Nick, I don't think McD will EVER replace Willy as the apple of his eye, but apparently there is enough room UNDER him for both of you!!!! PB, he's been saying some NICE things about you behind your back too.
Response:

BY: Freeze 19
Feb 23rd, 2007 @ 9:18AM


It's too bad we won't get the chance to have a drink with you guys again this year. The new team is much better than last year. You guys would probably only beat us by 5 this year instead! Unlike last year, at least everyone on our team this year played organized hockey before they were 30!
Response:

New feature

BY: kpark
Feb 23rd, 2007 @ 10:12PM


I have just added historical statistics. So if you click on a player's bio page, you can then see their career stats at the bottom and click on each previous season to see the Stats leader for each season.



I've also updated the My UVHL section, so make sure you log in and update your profile and information.

Kelly
Response:

This is awesome!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 24th, 2007 @ 9:47AM


Full stats, new format, great hockey, superb webmaster - this is phenomenal!

McD
Response:

I live for hockey!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 24th, 2007 @ 9:55AM


Yaaaaahh! This is fucking great. Lots of chatter, ball busting, and enthusiasm for the UVHL. Fraser - you pick-up your FREE case of beer at Long Trail if you won a POW. Cool, huh? Brian has offered to have our end of season banquet at Long Trail, so we have to pick a date. McSelfish - Kelly the real commish? Me with slow feet? Have you been stealing from the pharmacy again? I'll have you know that I voted for YOU for the 2/20 POW and not Willie - but that's the last time, you selfish prick! Congrats on your first UVHL Scoring Title, eh! Your last game put you over the top.
Response:

Vegas or no Vegas?

BY: jt
Feb 25th, 2007 @ 7:45AM


Hey Kelly, I thought the Kings were going to Vegas? I certainly would love to go and play some hockey and hang out with you guys from MN again. I would try to make a save or two and not get roasted off of the face off again! --JT
Response:

AWESOME!

BY: jt
Feb 25th, 2007 @ 7:46AM


I was wondering who won in each of the previous seasons. This is a great addition! Thanks, Kelly. --JT
Response:

Thoughts on the Playoffs?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 25th, 2007 @ 12:05PM


I really believe the Nords' will repeat at Whalen Cup champs. Who thinks they have the team to upset the Powerhouse Nords? The Avs? Maybe, if Bayley and Isaac are on, they won't have to rely on the REAL superstars. The Pole Smokers(Sorry, Storm Kings) really have me worried. With Frenchy in net, there's more holes than a Cambodian whorehouse. Get him pissed off and his team can forget any childhood dreams of a Whalen Cup victory. The Bruins? well, I love ya Hads, but I don't think you guys have enough down the stretch, Although, if you have a HOT!!! game in the playoffs, like you did the other night, anything can happen. The Leafs, again, if Kenny has a hot game, you guys still have a chance. You guys have plenty of speed, so strike early and often. Tuck, definitely has the best chance of all. Their team is so deep, with Hunter and Turco up fron and Anik between the pipes, I really am shaking! No, but seriously though, I will actually watch the other games this week, other than scooting of to the Bar, to get whatever wings are left after Tao sucks every bone dry then does shooters out of the wing sauce. Good luck to all, MARSHY!!!
Response:

I LOVE THE PLAYOFFS!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 25th, 2007 @ 2:29PM


Commish here, and I love the playoffs - UVHL, NHL, my daughter's U-12 State Finals, you name it, I love the playoffs. It is an environment where giants can be toppled, where (as Melrose says) "will beats skill", and "any shot on net is a good shot", Cinderellas can be born, and Champions crowned. I think Tuck has the best chance to win if they have a full squad, after that it has to be the Nords, Avs and Storm Kings in no particular order. I wouldn't put a first round upset past the Leafs or Bruins as there have been no nights off at all this season in the UVHL. Season 4 has been the best UVHL season yet! Good luck to all players and teams for this edition of the WHALEN CUP playoffs!
Response:

Off the face off JT

BY: ghadley
Feb 27th, 2007 @ 9:38AM


Your kidding right?? Who has proof of this???? And I dont mean Kelly's word which is worthless. Need pic!
Response:

Quite the challenge

BY: kpark
Feb 27th, 2007 @ 11:53AM


Well, I think the playoffs are going to be sick this year! Well, minus the fact that the Bruins, Leafs, Storm Kings, Avalanche & Tuck are in them. Just give the Nords the trophy. Just kidding, it will be an interesting year, with upset potential at every game.



The team with the best defensive zone coverage & goaltending will win, and the Nords have been focusing on that all season!!!! Go Nords.



Additionally, we are about to release our secret weapon which we've been holding back all season. His name is Poli "THE NIGHTMARE" Nightingale. He's CRAZY, and fast, and really really really really good at filling the holes of Dave Mathews Band's leftovers!



KAP OUT!
Response:

Random Quotes on the website

BY: kpark
Feb 27th, 2007 @ 4:05PM


Hey guys, I have been "lacing" the website with random quotes from players around the league. I personally like the TICKETS, STATISTICS & STANDINGS pages. I'm thinking of adding a ton of quotes to the Database to randomly pull up on each page, so if you have any funny quotes, both real and fake, I'll put them in the database.

Kelly
Response:

No picture proof

BY: Freeze 19
Feb 28th, 2007 @ 9:44AM


Don't have any pictures of it, but I burned JT with a backhand right off the face-off to ruin his shutout. It's a story I'll eventually tell my kids about...
Response:

BY: bayley
Mar 1st, 2007 @ 7:20PM


These are priceless Kelly...deff a great addition to the site. Just when you think UVHL.com can't get any better! I nearly just fell out of my chair reading them.

Good luck tomorrow against the Kings.

Lots of us snow coming our way so drive safe folks. Rest assured that if somebody does go into the ditch, there will be 3 med students (who know absolutely nothing about medicine and somehow slipped through the cracks at Dartmouth) behind you on the road who would love to test their newly acquired skills. PB is dying to give somebody mouth-to-mouth, particularly from the male sex. What a plug he is.
Response:

BY: pb
Mar 1st, 2007 @ 8:08PM


Erroneous! Erroneous on all counts! Nick get your head out of the gutter. We have a game to get ready for. Just because I possess the integrity and fortitude that you seem to lack, yes I would hop out and save anyone with the good ol mouth to mouth. That is unless of course they play for Tuck. Or have scored on me. Come to think of it I don't think I'd save a forward at all... worthless. Plus, do you think the last thing that any dying person wants to see is your creepy mug staring down at them? C'mon- they'd pray for a coma.
Response:

GAME ON! for Friday's Playoff games March 2nd

BY: hkydoc
Mar 1st, 2007 @ 8:13PM


We WILL play no matter what the weather holds for us tomorrow. Make your own judgemment call if you want to risk it if the waether is nasty. Unless Union Arena closes its doors and gives us a replacement night at no extra cost, we play because we have no possible way of rescheduling the games. Good Luck to all, and drive safe! - the Commish
Response:

Who won the Avs / Tuck game last night?

BY: kpark
Mar 3rd, 2007 @ 6:20AM


Hey guys, I'm just wondering who won the Second game lat night?

Congrats to the Storm Kingers for playing an awesome game last night. You guys were great in every zone and really dominated us for most of that game.

If anyone didn't see the GOALTENDING SPECTACLE that Turner put on in that game, it will be re-aired on ESPN37 at 4:30 am, in between the mini golf classic and skeet shooting. He really made 5 or 6 unbelievable saves that should have been open netter goals.

In addition, to all of you pussies that wouldn't drive to Woodstock for a consolation game. That is WEAK. Since when did hockey STOP being fun, especially when you already have the ice time paid for? That's embarassing.

Kelly
Response:

Tuck advances to Whalen Cup Final vs. Kings!

BY: hkydoc
Mar 3rd, 2007 @ 6:28PM


Tuck dominated the Avs even with only 9 skaters to the Avs 13, and continued to do so after co-captain Alek Roomet was ejected from the game after receiving his 4th penalty not even halfway through the game. Tuck emerged victorious 5-1 although Avs superstar Nick "Dr. McSelfish" Bayley scored a mere 20 seconds into the game.
Response:

BY: pb
Mar 3rd, 2007 @ 10:20PM


And don't think that the med students won't be in attendance on tuesday for the consolation game. We can't have the Nords thinking that they have 3rd place all wrapped up now can we.
Response:

I agree

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 5th, 2007 @ 4:13PM


The Storm King definitely desereve their win. The really did dominate the game in every way. Although Frenchy could have laid back and put his feet up, we couldn't even manage to penetrate their zone most of the game. Hats off to the Kingers on a great season.
Response:

Thoughts on Muds, Team DF & Bruins Alumni

BY: kpark
Mar 12th, 2007 @ 5:53PM


First and foremost. What do you think of the New UVHL MUDS banner at the top of the page? Does it look like smeared dog poop?

Secondly. Who's going to win the Muds? My bet is that my team......Digital Flannel, won't win a game all season!

Thirdly. I'm disappointed that I didn't see any of your ugly asses at the Bruins Alumni game this past Saturday. It was a good time and a good charity event for the Union Arena. We are lucky to have such a great facility and need to support it as much as possible. By the way I ROASTED Hadley on a Penalty Shot with Bob Sweeney illegally chasing me down!!!!!

See you in the Mud!!!

Kelly

Response:

BY:
Mar 13th, 2007 @ 9:45AM


Avalanche will win the Mud League. Taking care of business we should have done in the regular season.
Response:

Did anyone catch Potter's Logo?

BY: kpark
Mar 13th, 2007 @ 5:05PM


Did anyone catch Potter's Logo? Seriously, you have to check it out. Click on Teams and then click on the really light logo. It is awesome!!!! Probably my best work ever!!!!

Kelly
Response:

Thoughts on Ice Making every 2 periods?

BY: kpark
Mar 24th, 2007 @ 5:41PM


Hey guys, we were just wondering everyone's thoughts on making the ice after every 2 periods instead of after each game. The reason it is being done this way, is that there were a ton of complaints about the ice in the 3rd period of each game. Let us know what you think.

Kelly
Response:

Ice makes

BY: jt
Mar 25th, 2007 @ 12:49PM


I think that resurfacing makes for much better ice. Personally I do also think that it disturbs the flow of the game. As a goalie, it is all about getting into a rythm and when we stop to make ice it can mess with that. So I guess the question is what is more important, better ice or the flow of the game?

--JT
Response:

I agree

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 25th, 2007 @ 12:54PM


I must agree with my teammate JT. I think there are 2 very good points made here. I too like the resurfacing, it makes for a quicker game.(Only when there's not too much water) But the momentum shifts one way or the other after a break. Probably no way to please everyone, so like McD says might as well please yourself!
Response:

I HATE THE BITCHIN!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 25th, 2007 @ 1:01PM


If you didn't hear about the Potter fiasco from last night, i'll sum it up for ya. The Potter-Kingers game ended in a tie, And rather than send out three guys aside, Potter decided they weren't participating in a shootout. I'm totally at a loss. Mens league is the only glory days some of us have left, If I miraculously get a chance for a breakaway on the goalie, Not only would I jump at the chance, I'd bury it most times. The lack of respect was immediately felt in the dressing room of both Commishes. Maybe next year when Potter plays in the B-league, they won't have to worry about tie-games. In my opinion, Kingers 1 point- Potter-O.
Response:

BY: hkydoc
Mar 26th, 2007 @ 7:57AM


Thanks, Marshy. I appreciate the support. - McD
Response:

BY:
Mar 26th, 2007 @ 9:02AM


I hope I am not the only one who thinks that the shootouts are just fun, I thought that was the point
Response:

The Only Bitchin should be from the Kings

BY: mhickey
Mar 26th, 2007 @ 9:39AM


That is what it's about, Marshy you are so right. I find it difficult to agree with you,but when your right your right!! Men's league is the only athletic competition most of us have left. The Avs this year had a shootout against the Bruins that went to some crazy amount of attempts, 24 or so, and I think it was one of the highlights of the UVHL this year. Both teams were stoked that the commish let it go that long, to have a winner, except for Hadley who stormed off the ice and pouted, by the way he was awesome during the game and during the shootout. Although Hadley was awesome, PB Avs Superstar was and is just simply better.
The King should be the only guys disappointed they have one in the win column, that they might be questioning.
Response:

Intermission Entertainment?

BY: pb
Mar 26th, 2007 @ 1:34PM


I think that making ice is a must considering the ice at Campion gets beat up so quickly, and it's only going to get worse once its warmer out.

Also, I think that in an effort to make his childhood dreams come true, we should allow Kelly to strap on his figure skates and put on a show in between periods. You need fresh ice for that don't you Kelly?
Response:

Figure Skates?!?!?!

BY: kpark
Mar 26th, 2007 @ 7:05PM


Well PB, well.....well....well. How do I reply to that? Other than saying that if you think I am elegant and graceful on hockey skates, then you should see me in a SWEEEET pair 'O sparkling white figure skates.....oh, I have a pretty amazing one piece leotard that has "SUPERSTAR" bedazzled all over it!!!! Damn do those Rhinestones bring out the competitor in me. But the truth is that if we were to have me do a routine in between periods, we'd have to charge people at the door. I don't just GIVE this talent away!!!
Response:

Hockey = Fun

BY: kpark
Mar 26th, 2007 @ 7:11PM


Nicely done Marshy. Seriously though. When did hockey stop being fun for you bunch of whiner little bitches. These are MY GLORY years, don't mess with them.

In all reality, who doesn't love participating, watching, thinking about, dreaming about or even rubbing one out to thoughts about shootouts. That's pathetic.

go Stars!!!

KAP OUT
Response:

Ha!

BY: hkydoc
Mar 27th, 2007 @ 6:50AM


This is some funny shit! How about we have stoopid games in-between the "periods" like sled races, center ice shots, or beer chugging with the Dartmouth Doctor Fans? I think Kelly is getting turned on at the prospect of donning a sparkling crotchless leotard (again) and parading his metrosexualness and hairless body around in the spotlight. I think O'Neil has offered to be his pairs partner... How much are tickets?
Response:

Who did the post right below mine?

BY: hkydoc
Mar 27th, 2007 @ 6:55AM


Hey, Kelly, who did the post right below mine with the other Tie Domi at 11:02 AM? It wasn't me, so how did it get there without a tracer, and how did it look like it was me that posted it? I don't disagree with it, but I am perplexed because I didn't do it and was actively with patients at the time. Weird, huh? - McD
Response:

Rubbin' one out...

BY: hkydoc
Mar 27th, 2007 @ 7:04AM


Yeah, Kelly, I agree. I think I blew a gasket partially because I was cock-blocked for the shootout. Everyone knows that men like to watch...and we get cranky when we are denied the things that we lust after and work hard for! I rubbed out at least 3 or 4 good ones to that Bruins-Avs 41 player attempt shootout, especially to the sight of Bartline's huuuge pads and Hadley's soft leathery glove ...mmmmm....hockey....oooooh....hockey....aaaaaaah....hock-eeeeeeeeeeeey!!!! zzzzzzzzzzzz...
Response:

The Stars are Aligning!

BY: hkydoc
Mar 27th, 2007 @ 7:25AM


The UVHL STARS, formerly the team to be named Digital Flannel, have started to gel, and already have one upset win to our credit in UVHL Muds. There will be more if we get everyone to show up, for fuck's sake! C'mon, boys, get your asses there so we can roast the top dogs with our full lineup! Nice dog poop fingerpainting, Kelly.
Response:

JT is UN-FUCKING-BELIEVABLE!!!

BY: hkydoc
Mar 29th, 2007 @ 11:22PM


Just how fucking good was JT this week? You weren't there? Okay, let me tell you. JT was absolutely incredible this week in UVHL Muds, and he allowed 4 goals in two games against the best two offensive teams in the league (Storm Kings and Potter) AND TWO OF THE GOALS AGAINST WERE SCORED ON HIM BY HIS OWN BLOODY TEAM! This gave JT a 2.00 GAA for the week, and if you take away the two flukes he had a 1.00 GAA! AWESOME! At 36 JT proves that he still has his A+ game and the NHL was stupid for not picking him up as a grizzly veteran at the trading deadline this year. JT made some sick, retarded saves and put on a fucking clinic all week. Insert your own goalie cliche here: . JT - you are my favorite goalie EVER! Even more than Mike Palmateer, Felix the Cat, Eddie "Mr Billionaire" Belfour, and Cujo (all former Maple Leafs, that last one hailing from my hometown).
Response:

love is in the air

BY: kpark
Mar 30th, 2007 @ 9:58AM


And if you guys are interested. Shawn has set up a web cam and will be doing a live web cast of him virtually blowing a cardboard cutout of JT. See you at 4pm EST.
Response:

Weird scoresheet anamolly

BY: kpark
Mar 30th, 2007 @ 10:00AM


Hey guys, from our game last night......yes the 6-1 thrashing of Potter. The only goal by Potter was given to a #27. I know on the scoresheet it says that is Will Meyer, but I don't think he played last night. Will were you out there on the ice....you traitor! I could be wrong, but usually I notice Will. He is small, kind of midget like, so maybe that is why I missed him.
Response:

celebration

BY: no hands
Mar 30th, 2007 @ 10:15AM


Congrats to Shawn's team last night. Great skate. I also want to congratulate Kelly Park on his enthusiatic celebrations after his goals. Hands held high in the air, fist pumps, head held high looking to the sky. It sent shivers down my spine. All we neededwas the theme from Rocky blaring over the loud speaker. Good stuff.
Response:

I forgot all about JT's pre-game routine!

BY: hkydoc
Mar 30th, 2007 @ 12:04PM


Oh, yeah! I need to mention JT's superstar goalie pre-game routine this week! JT's recipe for success was as follows: 3 hours of sleep, drive to Boston both Tues and Thurs morning, work all fucking day, eat a lemon cake and drink a fancy coffee from Starbuck's, drive 3 more hours to the rink listening to Pearl Jam's latest CD all the way home, and then play out of his fucking mind with retarded saves, acrobatic moves, and a lightning glove! Amateur goalies take note: none of this involved sports psychology sessions, power yoga or pilates, good nutrition, or even a full night's sleep. You, too, can be a star goalie on the JT program! YAAAAAAHHH! P.S. Ouch! Why do I have a cardboard splinter in my mouth?
Response:

Park's post-game parade

BY: hkydoc
Mar 30th, 2007 @ 12:13PM


Thanks, eh. Good fast, clean game, and great hockey! Park was proud as a peacock after the game and pranced around with O'Neil in their "SUPERSTAR" dedazzled tights preparing for their Blades of Glory men's pairs routine in preparation for their intermission performance during the UVHL Mud Finals. However, Park is still lamenting the non-goal that was not seen by Gary Laperle and is harboring resentment towards everybody. I think he might give himself credit for it in the stats anyway just out of spite...believe me, he never misses a point if he was involved in the play, no matter if the refs saw it or not. But, who am I to talk? I'm goal-less for 35 straight games between UVHL full season, Thurs night B league, and now UVHL Muds...
Response:

Now you've done it, Park!

BY: hkydoc
Mar 30th, 2007 @ 12:18PM


Won't we ever learn? The last time any one of us did that (JT pointed out to Coakley and Hogg that he shut both of them down) the very same players came back and scored 10 goals between them against JT the very next game, so I bet Willie is good for at least 5 or 6 the next time we meet. Way to go, Park! Also, I must stick up for Will because he has always been a Potter player in Muds ever since he moved back here, and he is NO traitor. He is playing with his childhood buddies, and who can fault him for that? Nobody trashes Meyer on my watch!
Response:

I Love Hads!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 30th, 2007 @ 7:05PM


I really do! He is so hit and miss, the mere sight of a goal really sends a nano-drop of tear to my blood-shot eyes! What a locker room guy though. Also a HHUUGGEE cum-dumpster. Seriously though, I just read a response from Hickey on my forum blog referring to the bitchin in shootouts. How is it so hard to agree with me? I cannot even figure out who you are! I cant put the face to the name, Oh well, maybe you could line me up and piss me off. Probably not. Hadley, you really surprise me though. Great game the other night. Totally not impressed with the non-turnout at Murphy's. I was there until 10;30, and I didn't see more than 5-6 uvhl ers. Oh well, see you ankle-biters on the ice.
Response:

Hadley had his A-game, too.

BY: hkydoc
Mar 31st, 2007 @ 11:45PM


He is the glue that keeps the Preparation-H line together! Greg Hadley, full-time goalie and part-time winger, had his best game on the wing that I have ever seen him play on Thursday against Potter. He had 2G, 2A and clicked with Heavisides and Hanbury - the potent and extra strength line that Kirt Johnson coined (to Dr. Evil voice and poised little finger) the Preparation-H line. Having three lines was all the difference for the Stars offense against Potter. JT was fucking retarded, too, but that is the subject of another FORUM post. Three lines allowed the Stars to shine, and the Park-Marsh-O'Neil and Hayes-Loomis-Casavant lines were also bright! Sorry I missed you at Murphy's - I showed up at 10:40 and ate the fuck out of a chicken caesar. DON'T FORGET THE BEER ON TUESDAY, FOR FUCK'S SAKE!
Response:

Kelly learn?

BY: tgove
Apr 10th, 2007 @ 10:26AM


WOW!! i cant believe you even asked why kelly hasnt learned! does a career criminal learn? Kelly has only learned one thing and that was to move very far away from his family, (hell they probably paid moving expenses to get him gone) PLEASE "WILL" only score when kelly is on the ice next time. keep his +/- where it is @ - a billion. kelly is just mad potter wont let him play on there team....haha:) dont worry kelly hads still loves you..........
Response:

Player of the Week voting scandal!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 10th, 2007 @ 12:39PM


In a scandalous ursurping of the weekly POW honors, hockey malcontents conspired to overthrow their superior competition by by-passing the UVHL security features and voting multiple times this past week! We have NEVER before seen this many votes cast, and I am sure by so few people. In the final 48 hours of voting Greg Hadley jumped from a mere 4 votes to the second most votes ever cast for an individual. Was somebody fucking with him, or was he fucking with us? Pete Bartline somwhow held a 25-35 vote lead over JT for the entire week until the final 48 hours when suddenly over 250 votes were cast in his favor to ursurp the best player of the week - JT. However, in this democracy the votes count, and Bartline won fair and square...OR DID HE? I heard something about deleting cookies and re-voting rapidly, and the entire Dartmouth medical student body must be involved! Bartline finished the week with a record 410 votes. Unbelievable! Hadley came second (a personal first) with 352 votes. JT, by far the best hockey player of the week, was reduced to third place with 102 LEGIT votes; followed by Dan McGee who received an acceptable 21 votes; and last but not least was Dr. McSelfish with a paltry 9 votes. It seems that he has burned too many bridges with the freshmen and they no longer vote in droves for him as Bartline has stolen the spotlight. What do you think? Who is behind this conspiracy? Methinks it was the AVALANCHE!!! You bastards!

Response:

HA! HA!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 10th, 2007 @ 12:43PM


You won't fool us twice, Avs! You guys sucked so bad last week that nobody even got nominated for POW from your pathetic roster, so your evil plan of taking home all the POW honors from this years UVHL Mud League is officially over! The free beer from Long Trail will go to someone else this week, you selfish bastards! Bartline's new McDoctor name should be Dr. McGreedy!!!
Response:

Summer Hockey in Rutland

BY: vtdownhiller
Apr 29th, 2007 @ 7:30AM


Couple more details on the Rutland league.....

team fee is $2000

Players registering idependently to be placed on a team will pay $175

Tuesday, Thursday nights with the possibility of Sat. night games
depending on number of teams (4 teams = tues, thurs, only and 6 teams =
sat. nights as well)

anywhere from 12 - 18 regular season games plus playoffs and league
championship

Top team from summer league is given free entry into 8 team summer open
tournament the weekend of August 20th.

Nico needs to have answers by May 12th.... "maybe's" are okay

Everyone needs to be signed up and registered by June 1st.

Contact info for Nico : 802-775-5803
Response:

A pleasure fellas

BY: bayley
Apr 30th, 2007 @ 6:12AM


Gents,

Fantastic year. Great league, great bunch of guys, great times. I'm not sure what I would have done without the weekly trip to Union Arena. If not sooner, we'll see you boys in Woodstock next fall. The new-look Avs could be a force...

Cheers,

bayley

Response:

Same here

BY: kpark
May 3rd, 2007 @ 11:35AM


Hey Nick, it was great having you wicked smaaat kids playing with us. You guys definitely made the league that much better. Have a great summer.
Response:

I MUST CONCURR!

BY: The Dark Canuck
May 4th, 2007 @ 10:09AM


If that's even how you spell it! I love the fact the league has got significantly better each season since my arrival 3 seasons ago. I intend to stay higher in the top ten this year though, if my unnamed linemate(Webmaster) . A K A Skate master, Just Kidding Kelly! Would get his ass on some sort of workout regiment. (Tipping Long Trail all summer long doesn't count! Anyhoo, see ya boys in the fall!, Love Ya, MARSHY!!! KEEP IT CANADIAN!
Response:

Summer Hockey

BY: kpark
May 4th, 2007 @ 1:42PM


Hey guys, I might be able to secure 4 Sunday night skates this summer at Union Arena. I would make sure the price is as LOW as possible. The ice time would probably be 8 to 9:30 or so, but I need to know who would have ANY interest at all.

Nothing is better than walking out of a cold rink in a t-shirt and sandals!!!!! I'll make sure that we have 2 goalies there each night for free obviously, so if you are a puck stopper, or at least a puck-get-in-the-wayer let me know.

Bartline, I know you want work on those rebounds and by playing over the summer you might actually be able to stop me once or twice next season!

Either reply here or shoot me an email at kpark@parkcreative.com

KAP
Response:

No thanks, eh.

BY: hkydoc
May 5th, 2007 @ 8:09AM


Park:

Thanks for steping up to get some summer ice at Union Arena for da boyz, but I'm taking a summer sabbatical on the golf course, eh. See you in late September for pre-season!

McD-fense
Response:

3 on 3 Tournaments this summer at Union Arena

BY: kpark
May 8th, 2007 @ 2:21PM


Hey guys, Vic just passed this along to me and it looks like an AWESOME idea. I've never played in one of these before but sounds like a blast. Apparently they are one day tournaments of 3 on 3 hockey. Guaranteed 4 games of two 10 minute periods.

I think I will probably put in a team. Respond back if anyone has every played in one of these before or if you want to play and are looking for a team. Below are .PDF files of the tourney information and another for registration:

Tourney Details

Tourney Application

Response:

Shape up or Ship Out!

BY: The Dark Canuck
May 19th, 2007 @ 11:32AM


To all you Biggest Losers, hopefully you 've started your summer conditioning regiments. Maybe you're waiting till last minute, NOT a good idea. I will without a doubt be kicking some serious ass next season. Not only have I hit the gym at least three times a week, Cardio comes in also two to three times a week. I too enjoy Burgers, Hot Dogs, and Juicy steaks, and Brats too, It's tough to give it up, but gotta have will power. So McD, no more Super-size, or Biggie size for you, or else your UVHL profits will drastically be cut short. Operation-"FIT BASTARD" right? I think I'll need a new measurement on my height, because I know I'm taller than 6'2". Kelly, I know you don't care about a free season, because of the whole website and all, but I'd like to see your speed increase a little. I'll be doing my part, but I really would like to win the Whalen cup again. Although you'll probably be back on D this coming season. Good luck to all, and keep Biggie-Sizin em for my sake!
Response:

Operation FIT BASTARD has begun!

BY: hkydoc
May 31st, 2007 @ 4:02PM


Okay, you flabby girlie-men! The Commish, aka Fat Bastard, has officially started this season's Biggest Loser competition effective 5/28/07 after a post-hockey month of laziness. Get ready to rumble! If anyone beats me, then they get FREE UVHL next season. Is that motivation enough for you? Bring it on! See you in October!
Response:

Anyone Pumpin it Up?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jun 13th, 2007 @ 6:53PM


I'm well on my way of being repeat champ of the Biggest Loser. McD's got his ass in the gym, but can he keep it up? All the Nords had better show up for Game one in game shape, or some early roster cuts will have to be in order. This means you Tao. The Organization MAY choose to go another way if they don't like what they see. JK pal, I also hope JT doesn't run himself ragged this summer with too much work, we need him BIG TIME. I'm looking forward to the 07-08 season. Enjoy your summer Nords, and for the rest of you Biotches, no mercy. MARSHY!!!
Response:

Summer hockey blues?

BY: hkydoc
Jul 9th, 2007 @ 10:46PM


Anyone else missing hockey yet? I heard several of you bums paid Kelly Park for 4 Sunday night summer skates at Union Arena and didn't bother to show! And he only had 7 skaters for the final skate and 24 had paid in full. Well, at least Kelly didn't lose any money on it, but it goes to show you that summer hockey is a tough sell around here. I'm in workout and golf mode right now and I enjoy the break between seasons. As much as I love hockey 8 months is enough...so we'll see you in late September for pre-season and the UVHL's fifth season will get underway in early October with 10/9 as the pencilled-in start date. Commish, OUT!
Response:

UVHL Season V is business as usual, eh.

BY: hkydoc
Jul 17th, 2007 @ 7:30AM


Let the grapevine and rumor mill be stopped in their tracks. Sometimes we are worse than chicks, I swear to God! False - the UVHL is at an end. False - McD and JT are stepping down as co-commishes. True - McD is crazy busy trying to run two chiropractic practices and can't be a hands-on commish next season. True - we are going to sort out the reffing situation. True - someone is stepping up to run the day-to-day UVHL stuff, do the write-ups, etc because McD and JT are way to busy with their primary businesses/careers at this point in their lives. True - everyone looks forward to UVHL on Tuesday nights and doesn't want to just play pick-up hockey. True - WE LOVE HOCKEY! McD out.
Response:

Is it True????

BY: sfras
Jul 23rd, 2007 @ 8:09PM


Did anyone else see this or is it me? I was flipping through my latest edition of USA Hockey Magazine and right there on Page 8 I would swear it is our own JT in a Storm Kings Jersey.... Is it really you? See you boys soon.
Response:

JT is spectacular!

BY: hkydoc
Jul 23rd, 2007 @ 8:59PM


Yeah, it IS JT in the current issue of USA Hockey magazine. They have recycled his awesome shot from the Kingers men's nationals from April 2006. JT is famous! (again)
Response:

My friggin Hero!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jul 27th, 2007 @ 7:13PM


The only way to top that would be if JT had on a Nordiques jersey. But to say I know the Poster boy for adult hockey in N.E? WOW!!! Can I have your autograph?
Response:

2007-08 UVHL Season 5 contract signed by JT today at Union Arena!

BY: hkydoc
Aug 21st, 2007 @ 10:11PM


Players: JT signed the contract with Vic at Union Arena earlier today, Tues 8/21, so our ice time is secured for Season 5! Yeah, baby! We LOVE hockey. We'll update the website over the next few weeks to reflect the 2007-08 schedule, costs, USA Hockey registration, etc. The first night's schedule is already posted, and we start OCTOBER 9th, 2007 and have 21 games exclusively on Tuesdays this season and we finish in early March 2008 (I don't know the exact date right now because I don't have a 2008 calendar at my fingertips at the moment). Then we will have the UVHL Mud League at Campion Rink from mid-March until the end of April with 4 teams again - those particular details are to be determined in 2008. SEE YOU ON THE ICE!
Response:

One month to go!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 3rd, 2007 @ 5:44PM


Hopefully all of you have been Biggie-Sizing, Supersizing or what ever-sizing on the fast food, because only one month left till weigh-in for Biggest Loser. I am looking to repeat as champ. Although 14 lbs. isn't much, it was enough to beat McD,that's all that counts! Looks like I may be in contention this year also. Not that I don't believe in you McD, but it'll be close! I just checked oout Mrs. America.com, WOW, Mrs. Vermont looks HOT!
Response:

CRAP!

BY: kpark
Sep 6th, 2007 @ 9:34AM


Shit, I thought it was the biggest GAINER competition. I've packed on 35 lbs of PURE FAT thinking I would win! Back to the drawing board!

Kelly
Response:

Fat Bastard LIVES!

BY: hkydoc
Sep 9th, 2007 @ 2:12PM


GET IN MY BELLLLLYYY! OOOOHH, aye!
Response:

I need some skaters

BY: kpark
Sep 13th, 2007 @ 12:21PM


I'm putting together a Sunday night skate starting on October 7th, 2007. I've got a great time slot from 9:00pm to 10:30pm, which would most likely start out with 20 minutes of warmups & shooting around and then over an hour of pickup mini-games.

The skate will be a great warm-up for the Tuesday night league and will be cheaper than joining another league. We will have 22 skates and I'm hoping to keep the price around $250 for the season.

I'm looking to get about 26 guys total which would be great considering on average we would most likely have about 20 guys each night.

Please email me, Kelly Park, at kpark@parkcreative.com ASAP if you are interested.

Thanks,
Kelly
Response:

Fat bastard is IN!

BY: hkydoc
Sep 13th, 2007 @ 4:23PM


I'm in for sure! This is the best time slot of the entire week! YAAAHHHH! - McD
Response:

Hell yeah

BY: kpark
Sep 14th, 2007 @ 10:20PM


I'm pretty psyched for this time slot. I could really feel it out on the ice last year without a GOOD high tempo second skate. Fitzy just confirmed that he is in, I can't wait to skate circles around him.

Oh by the way, we have a bunch of goalies already confirmed. JT & Hadley will be the primary goaltenders, but I'm sure that I will make Hadley cry during one of the skates and end up quiting because he has been so utterly embarrassed by my sick skillz on the ice. Not that it is hard to make Hadley look stupid, considering he does it to himself on a daily basis, but it will nonetheless be a blast.

Sign up guys!

KAP OUT
Response:

New Forum Functionality

BY: kpark
Sep 25th, 2007 @ 2:53PM


I'm currently building some new functionality into the forum that will allow the person who creates or replies to a thread to receive any additions to the thread by email.

Check back later.

Kelly
Response:

TEST #1

BY: kpark
Sep 25th, 2007 @ 3:16PM


This is a great idea. Let's see how it looks when I'm responding to myself.
Response:

TEST #2

BY: kpark
Sep 25th, 2007 @ 3:19PM


It looks like it's working.
Response:

TEST #3

BY: kpark
Sep 25th, 2007 @ 3:19PM


One last test. FIxing some shit
Response:

Mic check?

BY: pb
Sep 26th, 2007 @ 6:45PM


Mic check, mic check... one-two. Is this thing on??

I got an idea Park. Quit playing with yourself online and go fire some tennis balls off of the side of the garage to work on that sissy shot of yours.

You get that in your email box???

GO BREWERS.
Response:

Damn skippy!!!

BY: kpark
Sep 26th, 2007 @ 8:20PM


Petey, you moldy piece of swiss cheese. I don't need to fire tennis balls against a garage to beat you with one of my sissy shots. All I have to do is close my eyes and pick a spot.

Can't wait to get on the ice. KAP OUT!!!
Response:

BY: bayley
Sep 26th, 2007 @ 8:36PM


Hey Park,

I've seen better hands on a fish. Without this website, you'd be nothing. Bartline is joke too. The both of you. Chumps.

Go Brewers

21
Response:

BY: bayley
Sep 26th, 2007 @ 8:38PM


That was supposed to be my sign off....as in signed by "21"...not "Go Brewers 21" which is gay. McDermott would read that and think I was cheering for myself. This damn form always messes up my neatly typed paragraphs.



Response:

Bayley = Charity Case

BY: kpark
Sep 26th, 2007 @ 8:40PM


So Nick,
I hope that you realize that you were a charity case last year. Bartline told us that if we didn't let you score last year that you would be on suicide watch. So now this year.....after having met you.....most of us don't really care if you off yourself. We got so accustomed to throwing that fake poke check at you last year, that I've been doing that in my sleep.

Anyways, Nords rule....Avs smell like poop, dog poop with grass in it. Too bad you girls are too afraid to face me twice a week, because it would be great to get you to skate Sunday nights.

Alright, off to bed, I need my beauty sleep. I know that it is hard to get any prettier than I am, but I have to keep up these good looks.

KAP OUT
Response:

GO McD 13! Yaaaahh!

BY: hkydoc
Sep 30th, 2007 @ 2:49PM


I've got a new battle cry, just like Nick! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! I almost pissed myself (okay, I did just a little bit) reading this stuff. Nice to see you guys are back at it with barely a week and a half to go. Yaaahhh! I can't wait for you guys to hear the UVHL radio ad starting on Tuesday 10/2 on the SCORE 910 AM in teh UV and on the Rutland sports radio station, too (starting Wed 10/3 in Rutland). See you on the ice, Hosers!
Response:

I resent that

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 5th, 2007 @ 5:54PM


Alcoholics have a problem. I don't have a problem with it, do you? I have an addiction to Hockey. I NEED HELP
Response:

I too have an addiction.....

BY: kpark
Oct 7th, 2007 @ 5:33AM


....and that addiction is making everyone look SILLY on the ice. Especially hapless goalies. I'm carrying around an extra 20 lbs of pregnancy sympathy weight just to help even out the playing field. Right now I'm eating a an extra large heart stopping fat-riddled pepperoni pizza for breakfast! MMMMMMMMM.
Response:

Have you heard the Radio Ad?

BY: kpark
Oct 8th, 2007 @ 9:32AM


Hey guys, I've just posted the radio ad that McD did. It's pretty funny and if you don't catch all of the "Strange Brew" references, you should probably go back and watch one of the funniest movie EVER!!!!

Listen to the Ad and let Shawn know what you think!

Kelly
Response:

Week 1 Power Rankings

BY: bayley
Oct 9th, 2007 @ 11:01PM


6. Leafs - I did not see any of this game and have no reason whatsover to put them here.


5. Bruins - See above. They have Hadley and he is an animal, so thus they get the nod over the Leafs.


4. Nords - Park is a liability, Meyer is gone, the team is in disarary. The only positive thing I can say about this squad is McD's wife is smokeshow. Here's to hoping she comes to OTG's next week. 2007-2008 could mark the end of the self proclaimed Nords "dynasty". Yeah, I said it. Go ahead Park, print it out, tape it up in the locker room. Striaght cash homie.


3. Kings - Dominated the Brewers early. Couple new pickups looked solid and Artie Stout scares the hell out of me. Hogger and Coaks will be missed.


2. Brewers - Look good...feel good...play good. Great uni's. Great squad.


1. Tuck - Might not lose a game all season.


Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Oct 10th, 2007 @ 6:45AM


nothing better to do at 1 am?...although you never know what team tuck will show up with...
Response:

You almost have them right!

BY: kpark
Oct 11th, 2007 @ 1:25PM


Hey Nick,
You've almost got them right, but I'm not quite sure if Tuck is THAT good or if my Nords are JUST THAT FLIPPIN' BAD. Last night was probably the worst I've ever seen the Nords play. Tuck was dominant though, I'm not taking that away from them. They beat us to EVERY puck, had great breakouts, good movement, used the entire ice surface and on top of that......they were missing a couple of crucial cogs in their machine that will be there next week.

I'm embarrassed and will be changing those Power Rankings around a little bit:

6. Nordiques. But I'm about to drop the nice guy routine, piss everyone off and get us playing like a team by week 4.....a la Herb Brooks.

5. Bruins. The B's got a HUGE win behind a great game from Chambo, but were outplayed by a hard working Leafs squad, outshot 35 - 15. The Leafs just need to fine tune their skills and shooting and they should be alright with their work ethic.

4. Maple Leafs. Hard working and fun to watch. Even with that little smurf CASSAVANTE on their team.

3. Storm Kings. Great talent with only 7 guys on the ice. One of the only teams that can actually play better with less guys. Once they get their legs under them, they can dominate games with puck control.

2. The AVS. The only week link is the Swiss Cheese goalie and ego-maniac Bayley. If Bayley could just focus on hockey and keep his mind off of the underage girls, he could be a superstar in this league. Actually, I've never seen a more dominating period than what the Avs pulled off in the 3rd during week 1.

1. Tuck. Not that we played well, but it just didn't feel like we had any room out there against Tuck. They managed to always have our wingers covered on breakouts, clog up the neutral zone and limit us to 14 shots.

There you have it. That's my expert analysis after watching all 3 games. The Nords have a long way to go, but you know what.....it all comes down to how you play in March.....and oh, everyone does make the playoffs!


Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Oct 12th, 2007 @ 5:10AM


and there you have our weekly write-ups...nice work, keep short and sweet
Response:

Hockey is Back

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 12th, 2007 @ 5:51PM


As for Tues. night's performance, It was not my best outing, THAT"S for sure. Either that, or Tuck was just unbelievably fast. Probably a bit of both. 'm sure The Nords will get better shortly. We definitely have some talent. After some chemistry-building retreats in the woods, a little campfire, a few roofies... wooaaahhh. was that out loud? See you fags on the ice.
Response:

Marshy blows...

BY: hkydoc
Oct 15th, 2007 @ 6:05AM


Well, it looks like Marshy finally let out that dirty little secret - that he blew a Boy Scout in the woods at Algonquin Park and that is why he had to leave Canada in a hurry...GO NORDS!
Response:

Mrs. Vermont 2007 is a super hot MILF!

BY: hkydoc
Oct 15th, 2007 @ 6:10AM


Thanks, Bayley! However, I won't be sending you any of her laminated swimsuit postcards any time soon....rumor has it that you get aroused enough in the locker room without any outside help (I can't believe that they are letting you become a doctor...but that is still what they call the guy who graduates last in his class, eh!). But seriously, I heard about your third period comeback on Tuesday - great job Brewers! Mrs. VT may be making another guest appearance at OTG sometime soon, we just didn't stay long enough to see you boys get there from the late game last week.
Response:

What, no responses?

BY: hkydoc
Oct 15th, 2007 @ 6:12AM


Huh? You guys suck! I poured my heart and soul into another UVHL radio ad and nobody listened to it?
Response:

WHERE ARE THE WRITE-UPS?

BY: hkydoc
Oct 15th, 2007 @ 6:16AM


Well, the new Commish has finished his first week on the job, and the countdown is on for his first ever write-ups. Tick-tock, tick-tock. Will he get them done by Tuesday at noon, or will he forever have to feel shame and take back every e-mail and nasty comment to McD for being late (at most) 20 percent of the time? Well, late or not, I can't wait to read Mr. Park's first write-ups. I'm enjoying this new Commish thing so far....
Response:

They are done!

BY: kpark
Oct 15th, 2007 @ 12:03PM


I have just finished the write-ups and unlike the OLD COMMISSIONER, they are actually done before the next weeks games start. McD, I don't appreciate you lying about how late and how often your write-ups were done. Your write-ups were late 100% off the time since they were NEVER FINISHED BEFORE Saturday and generally extended into the next week.

I do apologize for taking this long. It was a rough week learning the ropes of the new commish position, handling paper work for USAH, UA Waivers & UVHL Waivers & trying to get organized for this week.

It was my first attempt at doing the game write-ups and I have tried to keep them short, fun and bitterly insulting.

Let me know what you think.

KAP
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Oct 15th, 2007 @ 5:15PM


Great write-ups! You just have to stop calling the Brewers the Avs
Response:

OOPS!!!

BY: kpark
Oct 15th, 2007 @ 5:36PM


That's embarrassing! But I'm too lazy to go back and fix it. GO BOSOX!!!!
Response:

Great job, New Commish!

BY: hkydoc
Oct 16th, 2007 @ 11:47PM


Great job on the write-ups, Kelly! I just read them and laughed out loud more than once. You have learned well, my pedouin jedi! Excellent work on the nicknames, by the way. Very funny, and I expect more details next week like time of goals scored, penalties, PP, PK, box scores, etc. This Commish thing is harder than most people think, but I have to let everyone know that Kelly Park has done a great job thus far, and the league is in good hands, and in the hands of the right person for the future of the UVHL. You all have to know that Kelly has stepped up in a BIG way to make sure that we had the league this year, so please give him the credit that is due and buy him lots of beer at OTG every week!
Response:

Week 2 Power Rankings

BY: kpark
Oct 17th, 2007 @ 2:31PM


Since Bayley is too lazy or too busy bedding freshman, I guess I will launch this weeks Power Ranking Discussion. 3 great games this week that totally turned last weeks Rankings on their asses.

First number is this weeks ranking, second in parenthesis is last weeks ranking.

6.(3) The Storm Kings(0-1-1) : The only winless team through week 2. Showed they could score in week 1, but then fell to last weeks #6 ranked team. OUCH. That's a completely different team without Sean Coakley and Adam Hogg.

5. (6) Nordiques (1-1-0) The Nords turned a 180 from Week 1's performance. But beat the 6th ranked and winless Kingers this week. It's a step in the right direction but a Will Meyer-less Nords team will need to find some goal scoring & speed to replace him.

4. (4) Bruins (1-1-0) The B's lost their week 2 tilt to the Avs.....Brewers....Beer guys I guess. Anyways. They held the high powered Avs to 4 goals and rookie sensation John "My pads are taller than half the guys in the league" Chamberlain turned away 32 shots.

3. (5) Maple Leafs (1-1-0) The Leafs played ANOTHER strong game by outplaying and outlasting a GOOD Tuck team. Call it a fluke, call it good captaining by Sheawn Cassssavante, nah defininetly not good captaineering, but we'll call it hard work. With a solid forecheck, great goaltending from Le Lallier and some additions to the lineup, the Leafs look to be out of the UVHL cellar for good.

2. (1) Tuck (1-1-0) WOW, upset by the Leafs. That was one that not many people were expecting, and after announcing it at the bar I received a couple of "FUCK OFF YOU LIAR" & "YEAH RIGHT, WHAT REALLY HAPPENED" responses. Tuck is solid and didn't play up to their potential and therefore drop only one spot and not below the leafs. Sorry Leafs!

1. (2) Brewers (2-0-0) The Brew Crew has emerged as a DOMINANT FORCE, and quite possibly THE TEAM TO BEAT this season. Anchored by a solid goaltender and Dr. McSelfish....no assists in week 2, of course, the Brewers have a complete team.

There are my thoughts. I know I'm right....I always am!!! Go NORDS.
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Oct 17th, 2007 @ 5:08PM


I would have to switch #'s 3 and 4. The Bruins emerged last night as a solid team and Chamberlain has the potential to upset anyone in the League, although not seeing the Leafs in action as yet...and I am a huge Lallier fan, hats off to beating Tuck....would be nice to see the Kingers with their own goalie week to week, it could be there only falling point
Response:

Can't switch 3 & 4

BY: kpark
Oct 18th, 2007 @ 6:05AM


After seeing the Leafs totally dominate the Bruins in a 3-2 loss two weeks ago, only to see Chamberlain stand on his head....I just can't find it in my heart to put the B's ahead of the Leafs.
Response:

BY: bayley
Oct 18th, 2007 @ 12:49PM


Great write up Parky. My only comments would be:


Chamberlain is a stud. Not only is he massive, but legend has it that his pelvic thrust can hammer a nail through a two by four. That's just what I'm hearing. The B's are a very solid squad with him in the pipes. There has been whispers that the Brewers are looking to deal Bartline and a couple kegs of LT to the B's in exchange for Chambo. Let's make this happen fellas.


Response:

Mr. Big Shot?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 19th, 2007 @ 6:28PM


Kelly, first things first. I just read the write-ups from Game One. If you ever embarrass me like that again, Not only will you cease to be an acquantaince. Yes, you read that right. But I will not even look in your direction. You really think I have no Idea in the defensive zone? Wow, that's harsh! You really should be playing at a higher level. I mean with a head that blown up? You really DO know everything about hockey. I'm fucking serious, You really should leave the public trashing to the other teams. I can take your little bits of advice on the bench, but I think you've crossed the line with me. Keep your criticism out of my game. If you have a problem with my play, trade me! Seriously,
Response:

Damn Right I'm a BIG SHOT!!!!

BY: kpark
Oct 21st, 2007 @ 10:50AM


I'm the COMMISH NOW....Hence, INSTANT BIG SHOT. Can I get some feedback here on how I publicly EMBARRASSED Marshy in a write up? Direct quote:

"...and a garbage goal from Greg "I have no idea what to do in the defensive zone" Marsh."

If I get an overwhelming response that this was too "Harsh", then I will start taking down names of the overly sensitive guys that I can't have fun with, and I'll never even mention them in the write-ups again. Additionally Marshy, I only poke fun at the guys the I like, and if your ego is too big to be jabbed at in a MEN'S LEAGUE, then you should rethink what is important in your life. I've also made fun of myself in any write-up that I have done than anyone else.

Feedback please!!!!!
Response:

It's no secret

BY: vtdownhiller
Oct 21st, 2007 @ 10:57AM



Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Oct 21st, 2007 @ 11:02AM


sorry...I was going to say, it's no secret as to what Kelly says in his write-ups, for thoses of you who are shocked by his comments need to take a long look in the mirror. Those of us who know kelly well, and this includes Marshy, then we all know it is in good fun and not to be taken seriously, well not 100%. Marshy, I say this with all respect, but you are way off base on this one, as Kelly said, he only pokes fun at the people he likes and respects if you want off this list than so be it, but you should be flattered. Heck if I was Ian I would take more offense to being called a snaggletooth, Which I thought was hilarious just the same
Response:

Bad day, Marshy?

BY: hkydoc
Oct 22nd, 2007 @ 12:08AM


Huh? We can all take something out of context, or misinterpret things if we aren't in a good mood, so I must ask: Marshy, were you having a bad day? Either that, or sometimes criticism hits a sensitive spot if there is some truth to it. I've been guilty of crossing the line in many write-ups before the Commish torch was passed to Kelly, but I do not for one second think that Kelly crossed the line here. Kelly does make fun of himself at least as much as he makes fun of everyone else. If anyone takes offense, then they have that right and the right to blast Kelly, me, JT, or anyone else on the Forum for that matter, as long as it isn't personal or offensive to the point of libel, slander, or the like. Honestly, Marshy, if you don't know Kelly fuckin' Park by this point, then I don't know what to say. You are my very best friend here in the Upper Valley, but I think you've got it wrong this time, buddy. And I better not hear any responses to me about "never looking my way again", either! We ALL deserve criticism about our games at this level. We are all still very good hockey players in the UVHL, but in men's league there are no more practices, strategy sessions or coaching, no video replay (thank God!) to review our mistakes, no consensus for what to do on the ice and when, no consistency for PP or PK - we all just roll lines and go out and try our best to play as a team every Tuesday and have fun, and hopefully win or have some measure of success. There isn't one Nordique who doesn't make 2-3 mistakes per game, and there ARE players that have glaring weaknesses, myself included. For example: I have no business EVER being on the PP unless I play on the Thursday night B league or with the Northstars over-35 squad in Montreal in April. I back into my own zone too soon and too far, don't hold the blueline, and I'm severely offensively challenged, not in shape enough to jump into the play, BUT I should kill EVERY penalty, play iin the last 2 minutes of the game when it is on the liine, and I challenge anyone to find more than 3-4 better defensive defenseman in the UVHL than me. My role is to make sure we don't lose. We have others on the team whose job is to make sure we win. We could seriously use a real coach to help us out, and we ALL have stuff we need to work on, O'Neil included! So, in conclusion, I think you took it the wrong way, go have a beer with Kelly, and I hope there are no hard feelings in (or outside of) our locker room when we take it to the Brewers on Tuesday night! GO NORDS!
Response:

Week 3 Power Rankings

BY: kpark
Oct 24th, 2007 @ 9:00AM


Another interesting week of games......The Kingers showed pure dominance over a lack luster Leafs squad. Tuck bounced back with a SOLID win over the lowly Bruins. The Brew Crew stayed undefeated after a fast start against the Nords.

() Denotes Last Weeks Ranking.

6. (4) Bruins (1-2-0) The B's have gotten some good young talent on their team this year, but the problem is that they play like a bunch of young guys, not men's league players. They take too many penalties which will kill any momentum that they manage to build. Had's needs to talk to his guys about slowing the game down, use the entire sheet of ice and that Hockey is no longer "Skate as fast as you can up and down the ice".

5. (3) Maple Leafs (1-2-0) Did the Leafs peak in week 2 with a hard fought win over Tuck? I'll tell you what, they looked like a giant ball of shit last night against the Kingers....or are the Kingers really THAT good? The Leafs need a true goal scorer on their squad and they will continue to be successful.

4. (5) Nordiques (1-2-0) The Nordiques lost 4-2, but to an undefeated Brew Crew. The Nords are starting to Gel and backed by Turner in Net they can win quite a few 3-2 & 2-1 games. The Nords need a couple of guys to step up and fill the GAPING WIDE hole that Will Meyer left.

3. (6) Storm Kings (1-1-1) Hmmmm, quite the quagmire the Storm Kings are. They don't really have a full time goalie, but will have Turner in net 90% of the time. They play better with a short roster & their captain is 123 years old. The Kingers dominated the Leafs with great puck movement and the additions of veteran Ricky Hughes and UVHL Rookie Ian Gill.

2. (2) Tuck (2-1-0) The Tuckies were back on track after a strong win over the Bruins. Peppering Chambo with shot after shot and netting 6 on him. They are strong, physical, young and IN SHAPE. Week 2 was obviously a fluke. Watch out for Tuck.

1. (1) Brewers (3-0-0) The Brew Crew rolled on, keeping intact their undefeated season. Anchored by Bailey, Isaac and a sub-par lazy netminder, the Brewers ARE the team to beat. I have heard rumors that nobody wants to beat the team with the guy who has a stranglehold on Long Trail Brewery, but I'm not quite sure if there is any validity to that statement.
Response:

We have kissed and made up

BY: kpark
Oct 24th, 2007 @ 9:01AM


Marshy and I have kissed and made up. NOT MADE OUT you assholes. Life goes on.
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Oct 24th, 2007 @ 10:37AM


I'm sure you slipped a little toungue in there, just to make it official...I didn't recognize Marshy last night with his new lid
Response:

Anti-Red Sox.....Pro Yankees.....Blue Jays Fans

BY: kpark
Oct 24th, 2007 @ 1:30PM


So, I was devastated to learn last night that two guys I respect on the ice are severely anti-Red Sox / Yankee lovin' ass pirates....NOT THAT THERE IS ANYTYHING WRONG WITH THAT. But Nick Bailey & Christian Isaac of the Brew Crew should be tar & featheredm and deported back to Canada.

I can see hating the Sox because you are a Blue Jays fan.....did the Blue Jays have a Major League team this year? I can't remember the Sox playing them.......Any ways, but to hate the Sox more than the Yanks is an abomination to sports fans across the globe.

You guys suck, As the NEW COMMISH I'm thinking about possibly suspending you guys for a couple of games for even admitting that in public.

I'll let you know what my RULING is.

KAP OUT
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Oct 24th, 2007 @ 5:59PM


I'd say your ruling is about 5" fully erect!!
Response:

Stats

BY: bayley
Oct 24th, 2007 @ 9:57PM


Parky, you're a bright man. Do the the math.

Sox. 1 championship in the last 88 years.
Jays. 2 championships in the last 15 years.

Check, please.


Response:

Canadian Pitcher

BY: mhickey
Oct 25th, 2007 @ 5:30AM


Why would anyone think that a Canadian could be at all affective against the Sox' on the hill. They should have given that kid a hockey stick while growing up and no a baseball glove. He should come to Dartmouth because like all the other Canadians around here that guys "wicked smaat"!!!!

My Departing Chant "Yankees Suck!!! Yankees Suck!!! Yankees Suck"

Loyal Red Sox Fan
M Hickey

Go
Brewers
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Oct 25th, 2007 @ 5:54AM


As you know, demagraphically, Bailey only has 1 team to root for, so you have to at least give him props for being loyal to his roots. The heart of the matter is that he can hate the sox more than the yanks. My loyalties restrict me from commenting on this part.

The sox will have 2 soon...I predict Lester closing out the season in a blizzard,game 4, perfect game..
Response:

What the..?

BY: Sinbin
Oct 26th, 2007 @ 8:57AM


I heard about this lovers' quarrel but had to see it to believe it. Now that I've read it, I'm offended. Mr. Hissy Fit McDermott has insulted me by insinuating that we need a "real" coach. That's it, McDermott, you're benched! Not just for insulting me, but for the tantrum you threw last week when Mike Hickey accidentally bumped into you and you fell down. You're an embarrassment to the league! Get off the ice! Oh yeah, and you play a little too soft on the blue line coming into our zone. Pick it up, will 'ya?
Response:

Don't BITCH until you try it.

BY: kpark
Oct 26th, 2007 @ 9:01AM


Hey guys,
I'd like to start off by requesting that guys keep their mouths shut to the refs during the game. I'd like to remind everyone that we currently only have 2.5 refs for the season, with Carl only being able to make it to less than half of the games this year.

The refs mentioned that players were starting to get a bit chirpy from the bench and I'd like to put this thought into your heads that chirping at the refs is NOT going to reverse a call or even want to make the refs discuss their thoughts with you. You are only hurting your team by acting like a spoiled brat who is going to bitch about every call.

The UVHL is NOT the NHL, we don't have a 2 ref, 2 linesman system. They are not going to catch everything, they are going to miss a bunch of stuff out there and on occasion they may get something wrong. It's life, deal with it. They are not intentionally going out there to ruin a teams night.

At the end of this season, we are going to talk to the refs and find out who the biggest BITCHES are from each team, then next year, those players are going to be required to take a reffing clinic and TRY to ref a couple of games the next season. I guarantee after they try to ref one game, they will realize just how hard it is, just how hard it is to watch the play and try to see the cheap shots that go on behind their backs. So unless you have reffed a game before, keep your mouths shut, send your captains to talk to the refs, who would be MORE than happy to hear the teams gripes from one calm individual who is willing to talk to the ref like an educated and reasonable individual.

I'd also like to thank the refs for their solid efforts thus far.

Thoughts? KAP


Response:

Was that for real?

BY: Sinbin
Oct 26th, 2007 @ 9:38AM


Did that really run on the air? Props to Shawn for making that ad, then. Maybe he can help me with something. My friend was drinking a beer, your beer, and he found this mouse in the bottle. Is it true that if that happens, we can go to Long Trail and get free beer?
Response:

I went to the box and felt shame...after I blew up!

BY: hkydoc
Oct 27th, 2007 @ 12:17AM


Yeah, right, Sinbin you pathetic fuck! Who the hell are you, anyway? It WAS a SLEW FOOT, you dumb fuck! Mike and I made out after the game and we're cool - I know his clumsy B-league Biggest Loser ass didn't truly mean to put my entire career and higher brain functions at risk by forcing a stupid fucking useless play after I had body position and control of the puck along the boards. Shit happens, that is hockey, but when a major isn't called for that, I have EVERY RIGHT to lose my shit and I'd do it again. If it wasn't Hickey, who is a friend and patient of mine, then I probably would have come up swinging. If anyone ever takes liberites with me again, then they're asking for trouble! So DON'T EVER slash me across the hands or wrists, slew foot me, hit me from behind, hit me in the head, or do anything fucking stupid, or I'll defend myself like it was my life and livelihood - because it IS. I apologised to the refs for my outburst, I have been warned and know full well that I will be kicked out next time, but I never directed anything directly at a ref - I was just furious that it happened and needed to vent or I was going to kick the shit out of somebody. And, yes, I know I'm offensively challenged - its is no secret there. Ha ha, try to beat me 1-on-1 asshole! Ask Bayley how tough it is to beat McD-fense. If Sinbin happens to be the new guy, Brewers rookie Garren Poirier, keep your fucking stick down in my kitchen because you scraped it across my facemask in the first period! I know I'm not too far from a midget out there, and you're as tall as an NBA player, but you have to be in control of your stick, you reckeless bastard! Whew, I feel better now. This venting session was very cathartic for me, and considering that I have no such outlet in the write-ups anymore, the FORUM will be my new special place to try and be as insesnsitive as Kelly Fucking Park!
Response:

The Original Commish concurs!

BY: hkydoc
Oct 27th, 2007 @ 12:30AM


Kelly is absolutely right. Shut yer yaps on the bench or if you get a penalty. Didn't we learn our lesson from last year? If you dumb asses don't shut the fuck up then we'll be reffing it ourselves, and believe me, I know, reffing ain't easy. And yeah, I know I lost my shit on Tuesday, but I never directed anything at either ref, probably should have gotten an extra two for unsportsmanlike conduct (because it was) and I will be kicked out next time just like everybody else. It isn't the first time I've lost my cool (the first time was when Murf hooked me in the stomach), and it sure as hell won't be the last, so keep your heads up, sitcks down, and be considerate while you compete and don't put your fellow UVHLers at risk for life and limb on a stupid play in a men's league game. Hockey is a fast and emotional game, just think about the potential outcome of a play and the impact it might have on someone's life, family , or career. It is really that necessary to go that hard or play that reckless? So have fun, play hard, compete, and shut the fuck up!
Response:

Respect the Refs!

BY: jt
Oct 27th, 2007 @ 6:25AM


Guys, I think we take things for granted. I don't know if anyone else cares, but there will never be a Mudleague Champion in 2007. It is a shame that we can't just play hockey and have fun without making it personal. We all lose our cool every once in a while. Just remember that every player and ref is trying to do their best out there every week. No one likes to be criticized. I think the refs have been great this year. I have played in two games each night and they have been consistent. They let us play and call ones that are obvious. Thanks Gary, Carl, and Bob!
Response:

Park is right on.

BY: hkydoc
Oct 28th, 2007 @ 5:02PM


Once again, the New Commish is right on with his analysis and feel for the league with an accurate read on the first 3 weeks of the 2007-08 UVHL season. As we continue on with Season V, who will emerge as the dominant squad, as we already know that anyone can win once the playoffs begin! Old Commish, OUT!
Response:

HOW BOUT DEM BoSOX!!!!

BY: kpark
Oct 28th, 2007 @ 11:29PM


Man, I just got back from Off The Green with Hads, McDermott (now officially McBuffaloWings), Mike Hickey, Dave Fitz & a bunch of randoms. Anyways, what a game! What a team!

Now it's 1:30am and I'm going to be miserable at work tomorrow, I'll probably throw a tantrum like McBuffaloWings did last Tuesday, if someone asks me to do anything or even looks at me. I may get fired, anyone looking for a chubby, under-talented web developer?!?!?!

KAP OUT
Response:

Yah, BoSox!

BY: hkydoc
Oct 29th, 2007 @ 12:19AM


Great time tonight with KFP, HIckey, Fitzy, Hads & Co at OTG post-skate. The wings were delish and Hads saved my life with them, or I was going to waste away into nothing! Quit yer bitchiin' Park! If the Leafs had won the Stanley Cup we'd still be partying in T.O. right now instead of bailing from OTG about 20 minutes after the final pitch. However, the closest thing I have ever seen to Leaf fans is BoSox fans, and it is fantastic to never hear about that fucking curse ever again! 2 out of 4 for the Sox, just like the Nordiques, baby!
Response:

BY: mhickey
Oct 29th, 2007 @ 12:06PM


YES!!! Since I kept you out so late I feel responsible...Can you send your portfolio...

Way to go SOX'

Response:

Pre Game Reports.....Anyone??!?!?!

BY: kpark
Oct 29th, 2007 @ 2:26PM


Let's just start off by saying....Yes, I know I'm a fucking geek, but I've just added Pre Game Reports to the website. You can get to them from the Homepage by clicking on the game in the bottom right "Schedule" pane, or if you go to Schedule and click on the Time of the game you want to see.

Let me know what you think.

Kelly
Response:

Hmmm, nobody has any comments?

BY: kpark
Oct 29th, 2007 @ 2:30PM


It's amazing how we threaten to make the biggest bitches referees for the 2008-2009 season and all of a sudden, NOBODY has anything to say?!?! Wow, this ploy may have just worked!

In the meantime.....keep yer mouths SHUT, and I mean that in the nicest way possible.

KAP
Response:

Odds are 1-1 that McD has a total fucking meltdown!

BY: hkydoc
Oct 30th, 2007 @ 7:15AM


Ha ha ha ha! Kelly F'n Park has done it again! What a BRILLIANT idea to have pre-game reports, and they are totally accurate! - except that the odds of me having a TFM (total fucking meltdown) are actually 1-1 and not 8-1, particularly after Boots takes revenge on JT for the flagrant slash last season, or after Joey Hayes strips me of the puck 17 times, or after we actually have no forwards defending in our own end. GO NORDS!
Response:

NEW FEATURE!!!

BY: kpark
Nov 1st, 2007 @ 9:36AM


You can now leave your comments & thoughts on Pre & Post Game Write-ups. Let me know what you think about them!!!!

KAP
Response:

NEW FEATURE!!!!

BY: kpark
Nov 1st, 2007 @ 9:38AM


You can now leave your comments & thoughts on Pre & Post Game Write-ups. Let me know what you think about them!!!!

KAP
Response:

NEW FEATURE!!!!

BY: kpark
Nov 1st, 2007 @ 9:39AM


You can now leave your comments & thoughts on Pre & Post Game Write-ups. Let me know what you think about them!!!!

KAP
Response:

NEW FEATURE, Game Comments

BY: kpark
Nov 1st, 2007 @ 9:26PM


Hey guys, now you can go in and leave your comments on the Games, Write-ups, Pre-Game reports, etc. That should be a fun place to give your thoughts on how each game turned out and trash me on my write-ups!

KAP
Response:

Love it

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 2nd, 2007 @ 2:11PM


Kelly, I get it alright! OBVIOUSLY i overreacted to your playa-hatin at my expense. I really can take a joke, lets's just say that wasn't the best of days or me. Censorship sucks,So by all means let loose. I really did get too comfortable with our lead, and that resulted in my sub-par defensive display. I'll pick it up this week. I'm sure every Nordique knows how close we came to losing that lead, and quite possibly the game. It's too bad the coaching staff wouldn't lend a hand, and work out some kinda realistic gameplan, we actually stick to.
Response:

Love it

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 2nd, 2007 @ 2:11PM


Kelly, I get it alright! OBVIOUSLY i overreacted to your playa-hatin at my expense. I really can take a joke, lets's just say that wasn't the best of days or me. Censorship sucks,So by all means let loose. I really did get too comfortable with our lead, and that resulted in my sub-par defensive display. I'll pick it up this week. I'm sure every Nordique knows how close we came to losing that lead, and quite possibly the game. It's too bad the coaching staff wouldn't lend a hand, and work out some kinda realistic gameplan, we actually stick to.
Response:

Funniest write-ups yet... ever!

BY: jt
Nov 2nd, 2007 @ 8:19PM


I was exhausted after a long week and decided to check in on the UVHL. I was happy to see the write-ups and stats update. I laughed so hard I woke up both of my children as my wife threatened a divorce! Funny stuff Kelly. Great job.

Thanks,

--JT
Response:

Streaming webcasts

BY: vtdownhiller
Nov 5th, 2007 @ 6:18AM


With all the new additions to the website, what's next? Streaming webcasts?
Response:

Something like that

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 5th, 2007 @ 1:52PM


Probably more like a weekly pin-up shot of Kelly. I think a "RANDOM" weekly player profile, would be cool. Maybe a little background, hockey history, contributions to the community, alright scratch the last one, but Most of it's a good idea. Not like the "Long Trail POW "was my idea or anything. How about I bring my video cam, and we'll have some live game footage put on the website. The Vermont Nordiques website is currently underway, it's my first website construction, so I want to make sure it looks cool.
Response:

My money is on...

BY: hkydoc
Nov 5th, 2007 @ 8:55PM


Marty White on Viagara? I hope he takes it 30 minutes AFTER the game because I don't want any shower room horror shows in the game write-up... Well, my money is on Tuck because of youth, speed, and the fact that they are in second place, and deservedly so. However, Turner LOVES a challenge, and he has got a great squad in front of him on the Storm Kings IF they all show up. They have the best 5-man D core in the league with Rick Hughes, Artie Stout, Tom Scull and Stu Close, and whoever else they might put back there, be it Greg 'Goose' Gosselin or even that horny veteran Marty White. With the new players starting to hit their stride, watch out for the Kingers - this could be a great game!
Response:

Fat, hairy, smelly girls need love, too!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 5th, 2007 @ 9:02PM


Yeah, that was my motto in college, until I met Mrs. Vermont (that is her story and she is sticking to it). I'm gonna have to go Brewers by 2, and only because Casavant is away for this game as he is taking a walk down memory lane in Houston visiting a former lady love and is turning on the Casanova juices while at a "conference" on DHMC's dime (no wonder our drugs are so frickin' expensive!). The Leafs will make the Brewers work hard for the win - that is a guarantee! If the Brewers don't show up to play, then it is theirs to lose. Bayley - haven't you outgrown freshmen yet? Be a big boy and get a real woman, not a girl, for a change, eh! Bartline - we know you are a chubby chaser, anyways, so keep up the good work and spread the love to the girls that always swallow!
Response:

Who is Mike Marrazzo?

BY: hkydoc
Nov 5th, 2007 @ 9:11PM


Is this like the "Find Waldo" books, or "Where in the World is Matt Laurer"? Kelly F'n Park doesn't even know the names or correct spellings of the players whom he writes such hateful and nasty things about! Methinks Mike Marrazzo is the long lost (gay) identical twin of B's power winger extrordinaire MATT Marrazzo - how about that, huh? Well, where do I start about this match-up? The Nords are like a team with their head cut off, a team with no longer any team game to be found, are missing a lost superstar with the heart of a lion that has forced the Nords to look long and hard in the mirror at themselves to reveal their many shortcomings (yeah, yeah, we've heard all the jokes already...), and they are sorely in need of a coach and a practice or two, maybe even a chalk talk! The B's are on their way up, or so I have heard, and they apparently gave the Kingers all they could handle last week, so if the Nords don't show up ready to play, then they are doomed, even with JT in net. I predict a 1-goal game or a shootout! Flip a coin, because we don't know which team will show up...at either end of the ice!
Response:

Streaming?

BY: kpark
Nov 6th, 2007 @ 11:41AM


Well yes, there will be some streaming web content but you won't be able to see it on game night since it will be of me dancing nude in my bedroom. I've got a new leopard print banana hammock thong that has a UVHL logo on the front. Pretty sweet....I know!
Response:

OOPS

BY: kpark
Nov 6th, 2007 @ 12:51PM


Sorry Matty, I know better than that. I wrote that at midnight the other night. I was TRASHED off of wine-coolers too, I could barely see the screen.

As for the rest of the pre-game write-up. I don't know if I'll have time to get to it. Maybe I'll finish it now. HMMM, decisions decisions.
Response:

BY: bayley
Nov 9th, 2007 @ 5:30PM


Petey "I'm saving myself for marriage" Bartline.

hahhahahahaha

well done parky
Response:

Thoughts so far

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 10th, 2007 @ 5:45PM


I truly believe that on any given Tues. any team could beat anyone.Granted they hve a great start and play solid D. Tuck is a great team, but aren't the same without Turco. With him, they are really tough to beat. The Nordiques should win the Whalen Cup though. I mean, already we're starting to get some stuff going. By the end of the season, with a little more gelling, and the real HEART of the Nordiques comes through, We'll be ready for whoever.
Response:

Season V is great thus far!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 11th, 2007 @ 11:37PM


I have to admit, I was as worried this season as I ws giong into Season II - when we expanded from 4 to 6 teams. It was a huge risk, and we broke even by $20 by the end of that season. I was concerned about parity and the number of players in the league, but so far so good! We're at least as competitive as last season, and a few teams have lost a top player or two, but the other teams have improved, so it is pretty even. Anyone can win on a Tuesday if they show up and play smart hockey and play as a team. This is what the UVHL is all about, and we are all still hanging out at OTG post-game and having a few beers (and some expensive food) and trying to get wings (if they aren't totally out of them...) But big thanks to Hadley and OTG for hosting us on Tuesdays post-game because we need that beer and food "after a good sweat with the boys" - Tao Smith, Nords captain direct quote. Even if JT only eats anger on Tuesdays as he tries to lose a little baby weight, that just leaves more wings for me! Yaaaahhhh! I LOVE THE UVHL!
Response:

Wow

BY: kpark
Nov 12th, 2007 @ 9:07AM


I love how ANY conversation, email, forum post, thought of McBuffaloWings has to turn to food. We're talking about the thoughts so far on the competition of the league and McD goes on a tirade about how expensive the wings are at OTG.

TOO FUNNY McD. I'm assuming that whenever you "F" up on the ice, is because your thoughts drift off to Buffalo Wings dancing in your head, waterfalls of Blue Cheese dressing and Swimming Pools of Franks Red Hot Sauce!!!!




Response:

Not giving up yet

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 13th, 2007 @ 2:19PM


Although the wings @ OTG are good, they've really fallen off lately. They went from a nice-sized basket, to 8-9 wings as an order. I'll gladly spend the money for a great deal, but for now I think I might hit McD's for some chicken selects! I really like the post-game @ OTG, And although I'm starving after the game, I'll probably stop for beers religiously.
Response:

where's the write ups?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 15th, 2007 @ 9:42AM


It's Thursday already and no write-ups. Take yourself OFF suicide-watch, and pry yourself away from that gorgeous wife of yours, and GET EM" DONE! I'm anxious to know whose on the hook for the malicious raping Turco gave us on Tues. night. I say that because Tuck really is just like every other team without him!
Response:

They're coming....TONIGHT

BY: kpark
Nov 15th, 2007 @ 1:59PM


Ok, I just took the noose down. I think I'm getting over the fact that I am a horrible player, and my therapist just said that I need to deal with it.

The write-ups will be done this evening my good man.

Kelly "Captain Turnover" Park
Response:

C'Mon

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 15th, 2007 @ 8:57PM


Don't be so hard on yourself. Everyone has a bad game. Don't let it happen again.
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Nov 19th, 2007 @ 5:31AM


This could also be called "Jersey Fest 2007", you forgot to mention how difficult it was to play a game in which both teams were wearing RED JERSEYS....I hope that this never happens again!
Response:

Scared of the FORUM?!?!?

BY: kpark
Nov 20th, 2007 @ 10:55AM


So where have Bayley & Bartline gone? Are they now afraid to contribute to the forum since I am able to utterly trash them on a weekly basis? Do they not have any comebacks? Are they little candy assed med students that can't find the energy or creativity to throw back some fun insults online?

- Is Barty too busy trying to bust his cherry with a portly freshman?
- Is Bayley too busy trying to figure out how to actually pass a puck?
- Is CJ too busy licking Bayley's ass?
- Is Marshy too busy taking "De-sensitivity Training?"
- Is McDermott to busy eating drops of Blue Cheese off of his belly?
- Is Turner too busy crying about his GAA?
- Is Casavant too busy hanging himself?
- Is McCabe still dreaming about the ONE breakaway goal he has ever scored?
- Is Hadley too busy rubbing off his genital warts?
- Is Scully suicidal because people think he is cheap?
- Is Turco sitll complaining about being hooked from week 1?


HMMMM, lets get some fun trash talking going again.

KAP OUT!
Response:

Turco Whooped on us.

BY: kpark
Nov 20th, 2007 @ 1:12PM


Turco was nasty, scoring 3 of their goals....2 of the shorties. It doesn't help that I sucked and was out there for both of his shorties though. Nice game Tuck!
Response:

Bruins were NASTY

BY: kpark
Nov 20th, 2007 @ 1:14PM


The B's were nasty out there. They are finally starting to show some potential, but the biggest thing was that they only had 1 penalty. They can do some damage out there if they are even strength.
Response:

Ha

BY: kpark
Nov 20th, 2007 @ 1:15PM


After reading that first line, I was thinking, who the hell is from New Jersey?!?!? It's true, I think that the Kingers were in the wrong there and have to bring their whites if they are the away team and facing the Brewers. Apparently Scully dropped the ball on that one. I thought the Brewers were going to have Home / Away jerseys?
Response:

trash talk

BY: vtdownhiller
Nov 21st, 2007 @ 12:40PM


okay...ummmmm..ahhhh....you suck!
Response:

Nice start

BY: kpark
Nov 22nd, 2007 @ 9:02PM


CJ, that's a good start, but pretty lame.
Response:

Park does it again!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 25th, 2007 @ 10:56PM


Kelly F'n Paaaaaak continues to bust balls, destroy egos, and dash hockey players' dreams with his absolute genius and brilliance on the UVHL Forum! Where have all you fags gone? (no, I'm not looking for a piece of ass...) Too busy blowing each other after the games to write back on the Forum? Did Skatemaster scare everybody away? What the hell? Has the lack of beer on school grounds post-game stopped the camaraderie and joking around to the point that it is Kelly, Marshy, and myself on the Forum and at OTG until close 90% of the time? STEP UP YOU LOSERS AND HAVE SOME FRICKIN' FUN! This is part of what the UVHL is all about, for fucks sake! I'm even writing this while licking blue cheese of my belly and man-titties, dammit!
Response:

Extra Skate

BY: mhickey
Nov 27th, 2007 @ 9:53AM


Hey guys, Kelly Park has worked hard at getting an extra skate together Sunday nights at 9pm for any and all of us to take advantage of and we have had a dismal turn-out at best. I would encourage everyone to make the effort and get off the couch and get to this extra skate on Sunday Nights. If you can't make Sunday nights and you would like an extra skate Rutland City is opening the old Georgetti Rink and they are having Mens Pick Up Hockey on Thursday Nights at 9pm. Hope to see some of you at either skate... no more excuses.
Response:

Kelly Park Prediction

BY: mhickey
Nov 27th, 2007 @ 12:27PM


Kelly Park, in a mass email to the entire Brewer's Squad predicted a 12 goal blow-out, how, is the question, will that happen. I went to the website to check their roster and Will Myers name is still not on their roster so who's going to help Marshy score all those goals you Kelly Hahahahahaha!!!!!!!
Response:

Dr. McWhistle's formal apology to the Kings and Leafs

BY: hkydoc
Nov 28th, 2007 @ 12:49AM


Kings and Leafs: First of all, I owe each one of you at least one beer, and second, I would like to formally apologise to both squads for wasting their Tuesday night with below UVHL standard refereeing on my part. It was not intended for anything other than for a player-ref to get some experience, and in the future our player-refs will do lines only unless one of our Level 3 refs is not there. We should have been more clear about the game before it started and I should have stuck to our original plan of only doing lines, but I was encouraged to get as much experience as possible as a Level 1 ref, and that is exactly what I did. I know I missed alot of calls, and it was a game called much closer to the USA Hockey standard of play initiative than you had been accustomed to as of late, and I understand how that frustrated you out there tonight. We never wanted to put any of you at risk with a less experienced ref out there, and I feel bad for missing a high stick to the face and a hit from behind (and others, I am sure), but I just called what I saw, and obviously that wasn't enough of the right kind of calls and too many of the wrong kind of calls. Obviously, I have a lot to learn, but if there is only one small thing I can say in my defense is that I truly listened to all of the feedback, never gave an extra 2, and will take it all into account if there is a next time I have to ref a UVHL game. There are no hard feelings on my part for any of the criticism I received both during and after the game, none whatsoever. Go ahead and blast me on the Forum a la Skatemaster, there will be no phone calls to USA Hockey about it from me, eh. However, we expect more player-refs to step up like Mike Hickey and I have to get their Level 1 certification in case Gary or Carl ever can't make it due to family, injury, work, or weather. Ideally we'd like one player-ref from each UVHL team, plus the three commishes, and so far there are only two of us ready to step on the ice in case of an emergency. We are only Plan B out there, never plan on replacing our Level 3's, and will only ref if one of them can't make it or a more experienced substitute ref can't be found. I promise in the future that if a player-ref is out there with two more qualified refs it will be linesman duty only! My (very) bad, but I still had a hell of a lot of fun out there tonight and realized just how fast our league is because it really is great hockey and it was cool to see it from a totally different perspective. See you on the ice next week!
Response:

McDfense SCOOOOOOOORES!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 28th, 2007 @ 1:04AM


Yep, hell hath frozen over. I actually scored a legit goal in a legit game for the first time since March 2005 against a real goaltender. It might have been my best goal EVER on a laser slap shot from the right point that wasn't against a pick-up goalie or a squirt girl's team! I broke a 60 game scoreless streak!
Response:

Hell yeah

BY: kpark
Nov 28th, 2007 @ 6:50AM


McHickey is absolutely right. There are a bunch of you guys, and you know who you are, that NEED an extra night of hockey. It has the potential to be a great skate, but we just need some more bodies. Only $15 for an hour and a half skate.

KAP
Response:

I knew it

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 28th, 2007 @ 8:54PM


I never gave up hope McD! It WAS a nice goal, no garbage at all. I know you wouldn't want it that way. If only Myself and O'Neil can get out of our offensive draught. We're dryer than a powdered donut inside a yeast infection! AHHHH DONUUTT!!!!
Response:

BY: bayley
Nov 29th, 2007 @ 5:52PM


priceless parky

"McBuffaloWings wound up, unobstructed with a clear view of that giant sieve bag Bartline and let one rip right off the glove side post and in. I would like to point out that Bartline saw it all the way, he just couldn't catch up to it. I would also like to add that McDermott pulled a statue of liberty after scoring that goal"
Response:

Thanks bayls

BY: kpark
Dec 1st, 2007 @ 8:31AM


I think that was some of my best writing. Where the hell is that Giant SIEVE, Bartleby? He can't catch up with a McWhistle slap shot and he goes into hiding?

So sad that such a forum legend is too terrified to contribute. Not only has he lost his competitive edge, but also his sense of humor.
Response:

Case of the disappearing forum post

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 1st, 2007 @ 4:48PM


I'm pretty sure that I posted a forum topic referring to the incident at OTG on Tues. night. For whatever reason, it has been removed. Apparently the powers that be, are too afraid of repercussions from said referee. I would be happy to be hired as an escort to each game(webmaster). I thought we'd gotten past the insensitivity issue. This is probably the last time I'll be posting anything, Besides the fact, I'm one of the only ones posting anything anyway. Seriously, did I touch a nerve or something? Kelly, c'mon. Are you the only one allwed to trash talk on this site? I'll speak my mind from now on where it counts, on the New Vermont Nordiques website.
Response:

McWhistle approves this message!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 3rd, 2007 @ 10:36AM


Absolutely HILARIOUS, Park! Great job on the write-up, eh! Don't worry, I won't be giving up my day job...McWhistle-fest is officially over.
Response:

Actually, it was blocker side, eh...

BY: hkydoc
Dec 3rd, 2007 @ 10:46AM


The goal to end the longest scoring drought in men's league history was actually blocker side about halfway up the post, wicked haaaad off the post, off a one-timer from a pass from the corner that came off the boards perfectly to my well timed laser slap shot - just in case you were misinformed! Yeah, maybe raising the stick was a little lame for a 4-0 goal in the first period, but if you go 60 games give or take without a goal you'd celebrate a bit, too, eh. Big thanks to Tommy Girard for making the trip all the way from Glen's Falls, NY as a guest of my D partner, Adrien "The Mullet" Melrose. Great game, Tom! We hope you'll be back in the UVHL with the Nords soon, eh!
Response:

Hey Everybody

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 3rd, 2007 @ 2:10PM


Let's talk about anything at all that might not upset anyone. How about the league thus far. The Nords are really starting to gain some steam, after a HUGE win against the Brewers. With rumours of a former Nordique returning to the lineup, things will only be even more fun out there. I don't wanna jinx it, but we'll just say we're crossing our fingers. The fact the league is SO competitive, with any team having a chance on any given Tues. Does anyone have ideas on improving the league, or website?
Response:

I almost forgot

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 3rd, 2007 @ 5:46PM


First it was McDermott's Man-Crush on Will Meyer, now it's Kelly's turn, His McDreamy is John Thomas. I can't tell you how many times I've heard him utter John's name in the locker room, on the bench wherever else. I think somebody's got a secret to tell? Now he's got 'em in the pre-game point spread? Hoping to see his Boy-Toy in action. MY HERO!!!
Response:

OFF THE GREEN WIVES NIGHT EVERY TUESDAY

BY: ghadley
Dec 4th, 2007 @ 12:03PM


Calling all UVHL Wives,,,,,,, bring your Tuesday's game ticket stub in to Off The Green and recieve 20% off your dinner entrees for the remainder of the season. Marriage certificates are welcome but not mandatory,,,,,. Oh yeah for the small amout of women playing if married your husbands are not welcome!!!! See ya tuesday
Response:

John Thomas?

BY: kpark
Dec 4th, 2007 @ 12:03PM


Yes it is true, Johnny Thomas is my man-crush. I just love that chubby smurf like frame of his. I'm a chubby chaser, that's okay, I can admit it. Oh, and that is offensive to me! Please leave my name out of all further communications associated with the league, Nordiques, Woodstock, Vermont & Hockey.

The Nords are hoping to pick up their game a bit, but we did beat a SLOPPY Brewers squad last Tuesday who were brought down by selfishness, bickering and a lack of booze in the locker room. Some have said that Walshy is brewing something special at Long Trail to bring the tension down a bit, some sort of "special" hemp brew.
Response:

Long Trail Promotional Night at OTG.

BY: kpark
Dec 4th, 2007 @ 12:03PM


Hey everyone, help support the best brewery in the world, our own local Long Trail, as well as Off The Green Tavern & The UVHL by getting people to the bar on December 11th. The details are below



Long Trail Promotion

Tuesday, December 11th, 2007
  • All-day draught specials on Long Trail Ale, BlackBeary Wheat, Hibernator and Traditional IPA.

  • $3.50 pints & $4.50 23oz. "Vermont Pints"

  • Long Trail giveaways from 8-10pm

Response:

Kelly Park being traded

BY: ghadley
Dec 4th, 2007 @ 12:24PM


Rumor has it that UVHL allstar is on the trading blocks????? I will put this proposal together, Ray Bostock, Jeff Hawkins and our Number 9 draft pick plus some wings flavor TBD for Parkkkkkkkkkkkkkk. What do you say John turnstyle Turner.
Response:

BY: ghadley
Dec 4th, 2007 @ 12:31PM


As the head bartender, dishwasher and cook tuesday night I have to apolagize for the wings that week I ran out of money becasue the UVHL Storm Kings Except of course Marty didn't drink enough long trails the week before, I promise I got the steriod injection system back from marshy and they are now plump again.
Response:

HMMMM

BY: kpark
Dec 4th, 2007 @ 2:03PM


I'd like to know who the buffalo wings are for? Me? McChunkALunk? And the Nords know my worth on the black....I mean open market, so you better bump it up to an 8th round pick instead of ninth.

But then you have to sign me to a long term contract which would definitely require you not being able to dress in the locker room with me. Hads, I've seen how you stare at me while I'm getting dressed and quite frankly, it's very disturbing.
Response:

OTG Rules!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 5th, 2007 @ 4:01PM


Hads, your place is really the topper to an awesome night. What could be betta? Hockey, Wings, Beer need I say more? Well maybe a reach-around from Kelly. I'll be getting more and more people out on Tues. nights. If you lower your prices on food for Tues. nights, you'd attract a lot more people. Don't say you can't afford to do it, because I KNOW the cost of chicken wings! They're certainly not worth 17$ for less than 20 wings, seriously! Hads, you do take care of the guys on Tuesdays, but why not make it 35 cent wings on Tues nights. That way, you'd really sell a lot of wings. I'd be more than glad to hook you up with a great deal on chicken through the Co-op. Let me know pal, Just wanted to make a few suggestions. We all love the fact we have a sweet spot to wet the whistle after a good skate, Keep up the good work pal!!!
Response:

No truth to the Park trade

BY: jt
Dec 5th, 2007 @ 8:08PM


Kelly is a Nordique for life even if I have anger management problems! Nice game Kelly. I am happy that we came out with the "W" despite our "in-fighting". Let's beat Hadley and the B's next week!

--JT
Response:

Good times

BY: kpark
Dec 6th, 2007 @ 2:33PM


I always like playing the Leafs. Clean, fun hockey. Good group of guys....mostly smurfs, but still good guys. They play hard and leave everything on the table. Good game guys.
Response:

Good game to watch

BY: kpark
Dec 6th, 2007 @ 2:33PM


This was actually a fun game to watch. Amazing that the Brewers couldn't muster more than 13 shots. But we're playing them in 2 weeks, our goal is 14 shots! Should be fun.
Response:

Domination.

BY: kpark
Dec 6th, 2007 @ 2:37PM


The Kingers looked NASTY!!!! NASTY, NASTY, NASTY. TImmy Leroy has really started to show his true colors out there. To tell you the truth, I wasn't impressed with him the first couple of weeks, kind of overlooked his play, but man he is always in the right spot at the right time, great hands too. Barker is a bull in a china shop!

It was funny to watch the Bruins get all over each other. TONS OF BITCHING. Some guys blamed Chambo, and really shouldn't have, especially if they watched how they played in that game. Everything breaks down when the goalie can't trust the guys in front of him to make the right play, and then starts trying to do too much, cover both the puck handler & the pass. There ya go, hockey 101.
Response:

good times

BY: scasnh
Dec 7th, 2007 @ 9:59AM


Kelly, thanks for the kind comments. We always like playing the Nords too. No other team has such a great mix of wasted talents! You have a goalie who has a standing emergency appointment at his shrink every Wednesday morning. A giant mutant meat cutter who goes down on the ice more often than you talk about yourself. A gay captain. The defenseman in the league with the largest circumference and the highest percent BBSC (Blood Buffalo Sauce Concentration). A middle aged superstar dentist, who's under investigation for insurance fraud. A small speedy right winger who would actually be good if he would stop looking at his own reflection in the glass for a minute. The son of an NHL icon, who's only contribution to the sport is the worst haircut in history. A guy named Poli? A future doctor who clearly wasn't paying attention in class when they lectured about the bad effects of anabolic steroid use. And you, Kelly, yes you. What can I say? You are one of the most talented hockey players that I have EVER been on the ice with. It's just too bad that your ego, your unprecidented laziness, and you mouth get in the way of you contributing to you team in any constuctive manner. You should be cut from the team and just hang them up and save yourself and your teammates the embarrasment that you bring with you. Oh, I almost forgot, your best player and hardest guy to play against is missing all kinds of teeth and looks like he's homeless! To anyone I forgot to mention I am sorry that you have to play with Kelly. And, no Dakai, I didn't forget you, I just don't want to write anything that will get me pounded into a bloody pulp. Tom, you are a very good looking man and are a great hockey player........and I really mean that! Peace out Nords, it was a fun game the other night. Sincerely, SS
Response:

Wow

BY: kpark
Dec 7th, 2007 @ 11:02AM


You know what Cass. I've never said anything so hurtful to you. YES, I have called you a talentless little twerp, smurf look-alike contest winning, chubby, mutant ninja turtle little geek, but I've never told you to hang them up. I cried a little bit and then I thought to myself, oh shit, who is this guy again? I couldn't remember your name, or really what you looked like.

Oh well, what can you do. You may have been wrong about me, and I'll forgive you on that one, but you were SPOT ON about the rest of my useless team. I can't wait to CRUSH you on Sunday night. You better get some more of those little smurf-like Troll Maple Leafs to show up.

KAP OUT
Response:

offer

BY: scasnh
Dec 7th, 2007 @ 11:15AM


As I am a man (or smurf) of my word, I will keep the deal that I proposed to Screech at OTG last week on the table. I offer the rights to Chip "Crash" Davis and Fred "Roid Rage" Redden for Kelly Park. This means that if either Fred or Chip returns to the league he would be wearing a Nords shirt. The Leafs are one talented towel boy away from utter domination in this league, and I believe that Kelly is that boy! Well okay, the real reason is that I was hoping that he could get his 70 something year old hall of fame dad to come and run our power play for us (and maybe sign a rookie card or two). Let me know if we can get this done or not. SS out
Response:

no mention of screech?

BY: scasnh
Dec 7th, 2007 @ 11:41AM


http://www.nhl.com/nhl/app/?service=page&page=NewsPage&articleid=345710

Check this out guys, The Elmira Jackals do actually exist! No shit, sorry JT, I really didn't believe you played minor pro. Why weren't you mentioned in the article?

Oh yeah, here's another link, can anyone else see the resemblance to our beloved commish/ Kingers/Nords goalie to this former child star? Or is it just me?

http://www.tv.com/dustin-diamond/person/6488/biography.html

IT'S JUST PLAIN UNCANNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Response:

I agree with Kelly

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 7th, 2007 @ 1:04PM


I'll let the fall-down comment slide. The rest was pretty fuckin hilarious. Kell definitely DOES have a lot of talent, but he got such a rush of blood to his penis when John Thomas made him look like a friggin pylon, he nearly passed out. Maybe he'll stop trashing us and be a little harder on himself. He literally gave you guys at least two goals, sending the rest of us into cardiac arrest. By the way Cass, you too are a beautiful man yourself, scruffy beard, beer belly and all. Great game pal!
Response:

What?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 7th, 2007 @ 1:11PM


Cass, whatever meds you're stealing from your bunkmates at the funny farm must be some REAL good ones. JT is one of the most handsome fellas I have yet to lay my red, glossy blood inspired eyes on. That way his hair waves back, and that Philly grin, wow! Don't you ever say that about my main man again. Besides, he really doesn't look much like Screech anyway.
Response:

meat tenderizer

BY: scasnh
Dec 7th, 2007 @ 1:23PM


Marshy, wipe the meat tenderizer from your eyes and take a good look at Turner. He and Dustin Diamond were seperated at birth. Next you'll be trying to tell me that Ken Lallier doesn't look like Arcot Rammathorn (aka:Thorny) from Super Troopers or that John Thomas and I don't look alike (off the ice, that is)! C'mon big man, get your shit together! And you did DIVE on that play. I thought that Carl was sending you to the sin bin for 2 for poor acting, and I was in absolute shock when he said, "24 blue for the hold". UNBELIEVABLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Where's the short love? Growing up, I used to get all kinds of leeway for being short, now it's just a barrier to me getting laid! Fuck! Anyone know where I can get a good set of lifts for inside my shoes? Let me know.

SS out
Response:

PYLON?!?!?

BY: kpark
Dec 7th, 2007 @ 2:49PM


PYLON?!?!?? PYLON?!??!? Ok, he made me look like a pilon. It was more or less that I looked like a fucking retard on that play. I used to be so good at 2 on 1s. My game is going down the shitter and I'm almost in the sewers with Casavant's game now. SO SAD!!! Another 10 or 12 years and I'll have sunk to his level.
Response:

GIMME A FUCKIN BREAK

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 8th, 2007 @ 8:17AM


Cass, the only reason I went down was that I had 38 fucking smurfs swarming me as soon as I hit the blueline. If I have to hear any more about you not getting laid, which by the way is a very disturbing thought to visualize. I might get Norton when he's in town, to slide some sloppy 3rds or 4ths your way. If you can get past the load of bull-semen from Hadley.
Response:

Lifts?

BY: kpark
Dec 8th, 2007 @ 8:41AM


Cass,
I think Lifts are the wrong way to go, they will only add 2 inches tops to your height, which will still make you look like very very small, pudgy man. What you should do, is play up the santa's elf thing, you are the right height and girth for that, and the timing with Christmas coming up is perfect. Then once Christmas is over, there is a HUGE market for midget porn. Not really for me, but there are a ton of twisted people out there that would love to see your stubby little body do things to rotund short ladies with meaty fingers and large asses.

Just a thought and that breaks that short guy barrier to getting laid. Good luck with your future job.

KAP
Response:

Free ice on Saturday @ the Rutland Field House

BY: kpark
Dec 13th, 2007 @ 6:55AM


Does anyone from the A league want to put together a team to play our Castleton Club Hockey Team this saturday at 7:15.

If so, please contact:
Jordan McGee
Jordan.McGee@castleton.edu
802-356-2069

Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Dec 13th, 2007 @ 1:13PM


I could play. A word of caution that in there was controversy in the Rutland League about aggressive play from this team that ended with one team walking of the ice after the first period
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Dec 13th, 2007 @ 1:14PM


Is this game in Rutland?
Response:

C'Mon

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 13th, 2007 @ 4:24PM


Park, what do I gotta do, scorer ten goals in a game or what? The first time in my life I get four goals in a game, and no P.O.W nod? You are a joke, especially when you put YOUR name first. I'm guessing you added your number onto the scoresheet for a few points. HAHA. I guess I'll shoot for 5 goals this week.
Response:

MMM

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 13th, 2007 @ 4:37PM


There's no way JT had 31 saves. They probably didn't even get 20 shots on net! I know what he DID do. THROW A FREAKIN TANTRUM AFTER THE GAME! Sorry if we let you down, JT!
Response:

Hmmmmmm

BY: kpark
Dec 13th, 2007 @ 5:20PM


Well.....MARSY, you would have definitely gotten the nod if you weren't TRYING so hard to score in a 13 to nothing game. I've never seen someone stealing pucks off of team mates sticks like you and O'Neil did. If it wasn't for that, and the fact that you had fans in the stands, you definitely would have gotten the nod. Not to mention your SHODDY defensive play when we moved you back to defense, which astonishes me that you actually didn't spend any time on the blue line when you were playing the point. These are the little things that will get you a hand shake and a POW mention.

I on the other hand, exemplified pure hockey out on the ice. I was fantastic in all 4 zones, passed the puck like Guy Lafleur, shot like "The Rocket" and deserved a Lady Bing for my sportsmanlike play. I am a gentleman and a scholar. I am also an Aries, I like long walks in the park, Michael Bolton & cuddling.

KAP OUT
Response:

HUH?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 13th, 2007 @ 6:05PM


Shoddy defensive play? I think NOT. It wasn't exactly Lidstrom-like defense, but it wasn't that bad. And I take one pass away from Roger, which I apologized for immediately. Please do not compare me to O'Neil in that game. I was taking shots from everywhere, not cherry-picking. I don't have to explain myself anyway. I felt like I was 6 years old out there scoring goals. Let me have my moment in the sun you bastard!
Response:

Ok, you are right!

BY: kpark
Dec 14th, 2007 @ 11:31AM


For the 35 seconds out of the 35 minutes that you actually played defense while you were supposed to be playing defense, you were FANTASTIC. It was a thing of beauty and I should have never compared you to O'Neil, that was just a low blow. Nobody wants to be compared to O'Neil.

In addition, the smurfs suck donkey balls for beer money.
Response:

:)

BY: manny
Dec 14th, 2007 @ 6:29PM


I hear Kelly Park got punched in the face by a girl on Sunday night.
Response:

REALLY!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 15th, 2007 @ 9:13AM


did he take the puck and go home?
Response:

It's true......I did

BY: kpark
Dec 15th, 2007 @ 10:29AM


I can't deny it. She got me good, and NO I didn't take the puck and go home. I just went to the bench and sulked a little bit. I'm ok now though, and I'm going to KICK HER ASS on Sunday night, probably suplex her, maybe put her in an arm bar, then a figure 4 leg lock. I might whip out some of my SWEET kung fu moves too! We'll see.

KP
Response:

BY: manny
Dec 15th, 2007 @ 8:42PM


If I don't show up tomorrow night, it is for strictly snow-related reasons and has nothing to do with my crippling fear that Kelly may try to exact revenge upon me. He's lying by the way...he wept like a petulant child. I may not be much good at hockey but I can still pick on the old and the weak. Oh shit, I am going to get punched in the face so much.
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Dec 17th, 2007 @ 5:01AM


This write-up rocks!! It really captures the spirit of the game. You can almost hear the crowd chanting Bailey's name....
Response:

You deserved the shutout, JT.

BY: hkydoc
Dec 17th, 2007 @ 11:06AM


JT - we let you down. You deserved the shutout and you were 100% right. Hadley's team was a class act and wanted to, nay INSISTED on, completing the game legit, and we should have honored that for you and gave you the shutout. Kudos to the Bruins for keeping it clean and as fun as possible, but it was difficult to have a blast for either team with the lack of numbers and eventual fatigue of the B's. Sorry, JT. We owe you one big time!

Park - yet another brilliant and hilarious UVHL write-up to add to your impressive hockey journalistic resume!
Response:

Great First Half of Season

BY: mhickey
Dec 19th, 2007 @ 8:51AM


UVHLers
Great first half of the season, congrats to all the commissioners especially KPark for a great job this year. The competition has been taken to an entirely new level and each and every game has been well played by all teams. I want to wish you all a Merry Christmas; The Kingers even Artie, The Nords, Tuck, The Smurfs AKA Leafs, Hadley's Bruins, and especially my own squad The Brewers and are extremely Loyal Refs including Tony even though he took great pleasure in seeing our penalty box full most of the night. Happy Holidays and see you in the second half Brewers will come back from this break better than before...
Response:

Great sentiment

BY: kpark
Dec 19th, 2007 @ 9:49AM


Wow Mikey, that was so sweet. You truly are a gentleman! But he is right, this year has been a blast. Hopefully a couple of weeks off won't hurt the play too much.

See you in January.

KP
Response:

Simply Pathetic

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 6th, 2008 @ 6:40PM


You bunch of bums couldn.t even post one topic on the forum this entire break. I've been checking every couple days for anything new. Not even one of Park's ridiculous rants on just about everyone. If you hadn't already heard, He's apparently out for the season. I thought it would bring out the online-blabb even further, but so far...quiet? It'll be tough without ya Park, but we'll find someone to tape our sticks, and massage our balls. Oh, by the way, I'm gonna need my skates sharpened, and tied up before the game.
Response:

Bayley's New Bucket

BY: bayley
Jan 7th, 2008 @ 8:02AM


Fellas,

In response to Marshy's comment on the limited forum chatter, I have something to offer. Rumor has is that #10 for the Brewers will be sporting the greatest helmet every seen on an ice rink for tomorrow night's game. All I asked for Christmas was a "used, disgusting, green bucket." Santa came through boys, this is an absolute beauty. I look like a fighter pilot, I've been wearing it around the house all day.

Keep yer stick on the ice,

Bayls
Response:

That bucket.....oh....that bucket

BY: kpark
Jan 9th, 2008 @ 9:23AM


Man that Bucket was horrific. The funny thing is that the old man ref, Carl, had the same bucket but in black. Bayls, that helmet definitely affected your game, you looked like SHIT out there with that Oakley visor. Big win for the Brew crew, but the best part was Hickey working over Mike Harrington with 15 seconds left in the game!
Response:

I am pathetic

BY: kpark
Jan 9th, 2008 @ 9:32AM


Sorry Marshy, I was a bit busy to do any trash talking, not to mention busy not committing suicide since I won't be able to play hockey for the next 2 months. But I guess I can start out by making fun of you, you big oaf. Turner is semi-retarded and showed up 30 minutes late for our game last night. McDermott is is pear shaped pilon out there, and got turned more times than a subway turn style in New York City.

That's all for now. Go Nords!!!!
Response:

leafs make the news

BY: scasnh
Jan 14th, 2008 @ 12:45PM


http://www.cnn.com/2008/SHOWBIZ/TV/01/14/belgium.smurfsturn50.ap/index.html

.........enjoy! hockey smurf out!
Response:

Nice Bruins Brewers right up Commish

BY: ghadley
Jan 15th, 2008 @ 7:33AM


Are you kidding me a fight for the ages and we dont even get a blurb, a stinking stats page????? And the Smurf can get on CNN what the hell is this new comish do all day????? Working PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE get of your thumb out of your assssssssssssssssss and start puttinng that silly syracuse club team diploma to use and for love of jesus stop playing favor to that team of yours, marshy who does have a blister but has no clue where it's going ever,,,,,, red light turner who played in what professional league and had the balls to move to norwich ?he was late while livinng in woodstock for crist sakes,,,,,, tom the want to be state trooper and the mike who smells like a princess out there with his dryer sheet smelling jersey and I can fix your back mcd OK thats wrong he is my mcdreamy, and the rest of those back waxing posers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE I hadn't played goal in a year and I had to stop the dr's from trying to dry hump me all night,,, and mr beerman himself the leading scorer in the history of notre dame they hada hockey program in the 40's maybe they did but thank god his beer tastes so damm good at the OTG.. And not a mention us bringing back the big hairy back player Rob Pelletierrrrrrr who I think is just shy of total poinnts to you kelly and he hasn't payed in 2 years And by the way UVHL'ers I heard 2 of kelly's players not sure who they were but they were definatly in the shower together talking about how the cut Kelly PArk and that the laim excuse he is telling everyone about his knee is actually a LIE...
Response:

shut up loser!

BY: kpark
Jan 15th, 2008 @ 8:47AM


It's coming today. Like you care, all you want to hear is how you came in and played net for the first time all year and how bad you sucked. It's coming, it's coming.
Response:

Nice touch(HOLE)

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 15th, 2008 @ 8:50AM


Hads, you're totally on drugs. Yes my blistering shot sometimes has a mind of it's own, but it has blessed me with at least 7 points in 3 games. Just ask Petey Bartline after our game tonight, I'm sure he'll get tired of the rubber flying past him. Not that enough rubbers aren't flying in the locker room after another heart-breaking loss. The Brewers WERE the hottest team first part of the season, since then...I think an overhaul starting with Mr "Fly down the ice with my head cut off" Johnson, then "Superfly down the ice with my head cut off, then lose the puck-Isaac", would be a start. Maybe the Nordiques will actually have a full squad tonight, and TURNER- THE GAME IS AT 8 O'CLOCK!!! I REPEAT 8 O'CLOCK!!! We definitely don't need another "oops I misread the gametime" See you bunch of fags on the ice, I'll be skating around with my head down, so go ahead and try it!
Response:

Smurfette?

BY: kpark
Jan 15th, 2008 @ 3:45PM


WOW, Casavant, that is AMAZING. Not sure how you got global attention, but you and the rest of the smurfs should be REALLY proud. That is great news. On a higher note, after YouTubing some smurf videos, I have noticed that you are actually VERY VERY similar to Smurfette. You are both very small, blue and are bitchy and really obnoxious at the same time. So you are now deemed Smurfette.

See you tonight.

KAP OUT!!!!
Response:

Oh where, oh where....

BY: kpark
Jan 17th, 2008 @ 12:31PM


Oh where, oh where has Nick Bayley's talent gone? Oh where, oh where, could it be? Is it just me or is Nick Bayley starting to look like an old man out there on that ice? Especially with that new HORRIFIC bucket on his head that.....quite remarkably, resembles old man Carl's helmet. I guess since Bartleyby is playing half decently I can go after Bayley for his lack of heart on the ice. On the other hand I heard that Chris Johnson is not happy with the write-ups and is boycotting the league because I made fun of him a bit.

I guess I'll have to ad Turtle to the "TOO SENSITIVE TO TRASH" list with Marshy. If I were the Brewers, I would be BEGGING C.J. to get back to the UVHL ASAFP because without his blazing speed and intensity, the Brewers have only scored 5 goals in the past 2 games against HADLEY and the Bruins & the Nordiques. Missing Mike Hickey's flutter puck shot is a pretty big loss too.

On the other hand, if the Brewers could lose that giant pilon with a bad back, Dan Charrette, and that offensive liability, Sean McCabe they might actually be a decent team. I was surprised that Garren "The Stick Figure" Poirier has cut back on the penalties though! I think a chunk of Al's rotting flesh fell off on the ice the other night, and Walshy's pace maker was messing with the score clock in the 2nd period. I have a medical term for Isaac, but don't want to get beat up! It's great to see Hank "The Tank" Bouchard out there and just pity Kevin Calder. I also heard that the Adams brothers are quitting hockey and going into Tag Team Wrestling which is pretty cool.

Later Losers!!!
Response:

Bayls 1, Parky 0

BY: bayley
Jan 17th, 2008 @ 1:28PM


First off Parky, you have the worst set of mits in the U. I've seen better hands on a digital clock. And your feet? I think Bartline with his gear on could beat you in a foot race. I've seen better wheels on a boat.

Secondly, the new bucket is epic. Just ask Carl. It has all the qualities the Nords lack - style, poise, and character. Your lid on the other hand is hideous. It looks like you got your visor from a cereal box.

Lastly, you are a band-aid. Are you even in this league anymore? I think I have more snipes than you have shifts this season. Clean yourself up, sober up, brace up the knee, and get back on the sheet so you can continue to be the biggest liability in the league since Drew Crapser.

Response:

Park 7 - Bayls 2

BY: kpark
Jan 17th, 2008 @ 2:43PM


Bayley, I'll give you a two-fer for crushing me with the skating & stickhandling jabs. The wheels on the boat was PRICELESS and both made me laugh and cry at the same time! But to my count, I think I'm still way up here in the voting. You must take both my trash talking of you and your entire sloppy team into consideration.

I would like to extend this bit of information which may help you out in the long run...especially since you looked so uncomfortable out there the other night. I would recommend that you take Bartline's dildo out of your ass before you get on the ice. You looked like you were trying to ride a horse out there. I know it has affected your speed as well since you moving about as fast as a Canadian through the Labatt's brewery....or for Walshy, a Vermonter through the Long Trail Brewery. Plus you are about as intimidating as a bunny with a pencil. We figured out how to stop you, just let you carry the puck and fuck it up. Worked out pretty well. Oh, Bartline told us that little trick. He's jealous of all the attention you've been getting and figured that maybe if he brought you down a couple of pegs he'd could get some of the HONEY'S from the UVHL fan club and finally loose his virginity.

KAP OUT!
Response:

PB 10, Park and Bayley 0 (I win automatically because neither of you herbs can count that high)

BY: pb
Jan 17th, 2008 @ 4:19PM


I'm throwing my hat in the ring now after a long hiatus mainly because Park has no friends, and spends so much time crying about nobody posting that he is neglecting his wife and rugrats back home.

Also I figured I might as well defend myself since Parky is after blood. I mean, I understand attacking my game (since realistically, the only person more embarrassed of his goaltending this year is JT, who manages even to make McPokecheck-Pylon look bad out there) but attacking my virginity?? C'mon Parky- that's a low blow! And it's not even true either...what I'm about to tell you may hurt, but you've forced me get this off of my chest: Mrs ParkCreative.com and I shared a night of passion last season. I'm not proud of it, but after hitting the hot sauce one night at OTG you were nowhere to be found and, welp, the rest is history. I mean you should have known! Just take one look at your kid- he came out with a blond head of hair, five-pound D, and rumor has it he strangled a deer right from the womb... when he's a foot taller than you at age-5, you should probably tell him the truth.

As for Bayley, it's no surprise that he's lost a step or two. He spends more time in the mirror than on the bike at the gym, and more time showering in the dude's locker room than the Adam's brothers. Hey Hollywood, put down the Celly and shed a couple of Lbs (or kilos, silly Canadians) we've got a UVHL championship to win.

Oh, and Parky, if you come after me in a jealous rage I'll send Isaac after you

yours in goal (and gene-pool),

PB
Response:

That was too funny

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 17th, 2008 @ 7:37PM


Bartline, that was probably the funniest forum post I've ever seen. The fact that Kelly gets by(and off) on trashing everybody in the league. He even trashes his own teammates for FUCK SAKES! Kelly by the way, Bartline is my new man-crush, sorry your out on your ass. Seriously dude, get a hobby, you're obviously too consumed with the whole Joe"insert retarded joke here" Blow humor. I'd like to commend you on some pretty good write-ups though, see ya homo!
Response:

Oh Bartleby....

BY: kpark
Jan 18th, 2008 @ 9:57PM


Bartline, you are so lame. My wife saw you once and said, who's that big goofy giraffe look-a-like gay dude? My wife has standards, and doesn't go slumming with gay guys. Anyways, Marshy is apparently still a bit sensitive since I wrote in a write-up that his defensive play was lazier than a Mexican at lunch time during Cinco De Mayo and chomping on a chillupa.

Now that I have dismantled my good friend Le MiserableMARSHY, I can turn my sights to Bartline. I think I'm going to just chop off my bum leg at the knee to give you a chance at stopping me. You may be faster than me with all of your goalie equipment on and carrying a 30 rack of wine coolers on your back, but.......a 30 rack of wine coolers? Anyways, but you still have no chance at stopping me when I'm moving at a record pace of .33333 miles per hour. Granted, you may be asleep by the time I actually make it down the ice, but that may or may not be part of my game plan. I will light you up like a cheap joint at The Fonze's office. I will burn you like an Albino in the desert. I will make you cry, and then blow snot bubbles.

I OWN YOU!!!


KAP
Response:

I am so thrilled

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 19th, 2008 @ 7:41PM


With the new material being posted to the forum, I'll actually have something to check every day. Since I usually have nothing but spam in my e-mail, it makes no sense to even turn the computer on, other than checking out some free porn on www.xtube.com. Check it out, guaranteed to ruin a marriage. So stop hatin on Bartline anyway Kelly, Why DO you own him? How many times in your estimation have you scored on PB? And I'm not counting that one time after mud league last year when you had too many PBR's, Only to wake up in the back seat of his car. Drunk and disoriented, you guys pulled out of Casavant's driveway, and the awkward ride home began. Please, when you muster up the energy enough to get off the couch, and get to rehab, maybe the Nords' will consider you re-joining the team.
Response:

Marshy

BY: kpark
Jan 22nd, 2008 @ 1:46PM


I'm not sure if I can make fun of you yet, I haven't received the request from your lawyer to be removed from the "Cry Baby About Forum & Write-ups Bashin' List." The last thing I would want to do is TEAR YOU DOWN again, make you cry, jump off of the Quechee Gorge with a side of beef in your hands and then I'd get sued by your family for being too insensitive.

On the other hand, I can go after Bartleby all I want. Why are you stickin' up for that enourmous piece of worm wood anyways? I have probably scored on Bartline at least 100 times, maybe even more. It was to the point that I started missing the net on purpose because I was afraid he'd hurt himself if I scored on him AGAIN. Picked up some bad habits there I guess.

What happened in Bartline's car is our business, but it was romantic and sweet.

KAP
Response:

New Team Logos

BY: kpark
Jan 23rd, 2008 @ 1:33PM


I know I'm a loser, but I decided to create some new Team Logos with a little WEB 2.0 FLARE!!! Let me know what you think.

BrewersBruinsMaple LeafsNordiquesStorm KingsTuck
Response:

Great Game

BY: kpark
Jan 23rd, 2008 @ 3:50PM


That was an awesome game to watch, not nearly as much fun as playing in it, but still. The two goalies were great, especially Turner. Casavant is still a midget.
Response:

C'Mon

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 23rd, 2008 @ 8:47PM


Those aren't new, who the fuck do you think you're fooling? I know you're a recluse, but you can do better than that? With that fancy new toy of yours, shouldn't be a problem, No, not that kind of toy. Put it away before you kid gets a hold of it!
Response:

Another great idea

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 23rd, 2008 @ 9:05PM


Kelly, with all the off-time you're enjoying(haha) why don't you get a decent photo of every player. Really it wouldn't take long, you're there all night anyway. Just another improvement to the league courtesy of Marshy, I'll keep you posted on any new ideas coming to mind
Response:

Marshy, Marshy, Marshy!!

BY: kpark
Jan 23rd, 2008 @ 9:14PM


You are a hateful, despicable individual. You are just downright mean and full of spite. You hurt me in ways that I can not describe at this moment or in this emotional state. I just made an emergency call to my therapist who said that I shouldn't respond to your childish attacks.

Sincerely, your friend in arms.

Kelly
Response:

I am totally sorry

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 24th, 2008 @ 2:26PM


Kelly , in your fragile state I'll lay off. Call it pent-up aggression for past shots at my intelligence and talent. I know that I'm good enough, smart enough and DOGGONE IT People Like Me! I will in the future take a deep breath and think first before I send you out on the ledge again.
Your Pal, Marshy!!!!
Response:

My head was spinnin!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 25th, 2008 @ 5:33AM


It was a tough game to play in. The Leafs have so much heart and never give up. They forechecked the snot out of us, and I was exhausted (not just because I'm fat) because the Leafs never gave us any time to move the puck. There were a few times in front of our net that I didn't know who to cover. It was me and Turner and a sea of blue in front of the net. If JT didn't bring his A game this one would have been close. I think JT said that we haven't had a game with the Leafs in about 2 seasons that wasn't a 1-goal game either way before this past Tuesday. The Leafs are only 1-2 players away from being domiinant, and their goaltending has been really solid and Lallier has been playing great the past 2 seasons (he just seems to keep getting better), and their blue line is set now with 2 solid pairings led by Colin Vernon. Too bad they were missing Nalette and Spicoli on Tuesday, but I was exhausted enough as it was. Great game Leafs! Solid game, BJ, thanks for filling in! Incredible game, JT!
Response:

Another Great Idea........from a mental midget!!!!

BY: kpark
Jan 28th, 2008 @ 11:27AM


Yeah Marshy, GREAT idea! So I'm going to spend all night taking headshots of guys that probably don't want their picture up there. Plus half of these goons would scare any children that decide to visit this wonderful website, terrorizing them in their dreams and ultimately turning them away from hockey and towards a life of crime. So essentially, by putting up your mugshot on the UVHL website, we'd be declaring a holy war against the regions hockey youth and providing a helping hand in the increase of violent crimes in the area.....

Yeah, another GREAT IDEA from MARSHY!!!!
Response:

...

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 29th, 2008 @ 7:12AM


I hate you
Response:

our well?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 29th, 2008 @ 7:17AM


when are you coming back anyway? Although we could use your lack-luster skills, and obvious lack of intensity, some people actually think we'd be better off with you in the lineup. Kelly, you really need to get back soon, or else we may trade the rights to your contract. I hear Blue's been buzzing around Woodstock, just itching to get back in the game. It's gonna be a front office decision, my hands are tied.
Response:

coming back?

BY: kpark
Jan 29th, 2008 @ 8:15AM


No idea, going to physical therapy today. It's killing me to not play though.
Response:

Kelly, this new format is bitchin'!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 29th, 2008 @ 3:52PM


Yah, Park! Nice job on the pre-game formats and logos! AWESOME! We really DO miss you out there, particularly in the shower room post-game (I've got this four foot square region on my back I can't get anymore full of blue cheese and buffalo sauce), but sometimes when a star player goes down in battle the pee-ons and pluggers pull it together and play a better team game. That is my theory, anyway, so don't rush back prematurely and let that knee heal, otherwise you'll be sittin' for Mud League, too, eh.
Response:

Absolutely love the logos!

BY: jt
Jan 29th, 2008 @ 10:02PM


Might be the best visual enhancement that I have seeb in some time. The UVHL rules! Park rules? Can you get healthy and help us out on the ice web-head?!
Response:

UVHL & CHaD(Chilren's Hospital at Dartmouth)

BY: kpark
Feb 1st, 2008 @ 7:50AM


Hey guys, I was contacted by a woman from the Children's Hospital at Dartmouth, and they are putting together a fundraiser down at the Verizon Wireless Center in Manchester and was hoping that we could supply 2 teams. Or we could put together 1 team and I could try and get a bunch of buddies from Boston to play against. It's for a great cause, please let me know if anyone is interested. The information is below, Thanks, Kelly


Love hockey? Know someone else who does? How'd you like to play some at the Verizon Wireless Arena in Manchester, NH? Here's your chance! Raise money for CHaD, the Children's Hospital at Dartmouth, and we'll set you up with a game on the ice in the professional arena. In fact, challenge your biggest rival and we'll give you a grudge match!

Sunday, March 30, 2008, CHaD is sponsoring a day of hockey at the Verizon Wireless Arena. We have the ice, we just need the teams. Will your's be one of them?

Each team is asked to raise $5,000 collectively ­ approximately $300 per player. All proceeds will support the programs of CHaD. Here's how it works:

- Your team registers using the contact information below...HURRY, space is LIMITED.

- When you register, you are given your own website to use for fundraising, which links to your Team's home page. Each Team member's total is combined toward the Team's total.

- In addition to the opportunity to play on professional ice, each player will also receive 4 tickets to the Battle of the Badges game later that day, where you can watch New Hampshire Firefighters face off against New Hampshire Police Officers, for the first annual CHaD Cup and bragging rights!

Sorry kids, players must be adults 18 years or older.

For more information and to register please contact Elizabeth Clarke:

By phone at 603-650-3437, or through email at Elizabeth.Clarke@Hitchcock.org

Visit our website at CHaDHockey.org

Elizabeth H. Clarke
CHaD Community Relations
Dartmouth Hitchcock Medical Center
Tel.: (603) 650-3437

Response:

Great Idea Kelly!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 2nd, 2008 @ 3:38PM


But who would actually get to play? If I raise money but not enough, do I still get to play? Is it whoever raises the most? Sounds like a great time. If I can I'll raise a few bucks though. Let me know more if you can.
Response:

Football is over......Sunday night skate!

BY: kpark
Feb 4th, 2008 @ 11:13AM


Hey guys, now that Football is over, let's get the Sunday night skate back on. I tested out the knee yesterday and it felt pretty good, so I'll be back on the ice this Sunday night. I think we've had about 8 or 9 guys lately with at least 1 goalie, and all we need is another 7 or 8 to make it a great skate.

Let me know if you're coming!

Kelly
Response:

UNDERDOG

BY: habman
Feb 5th, 2008 @ 7:21AM


With that other sporting event turning out the way it did on Sunday, it might be good to be the 3 goal underdog tonight...
Response:

Should be a good one!

BY: kpark
Feb 5th, 2008 @ 1:56PM


Alright Nords, put your game faces on and make this a good game. Especially after thoroughly being embarrassed by the Bruins last week.
Response:

fag

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 5th, 2008 @ 3:35PM


yeah, I said FAG! Are youreally predicting a Nords loss? Find another team!
Response:

Check your head!

BY: kpark
Feb 5th, 2008 @ 3:38PM


Well, Marshy!!! Did you not watch that game last week against the LOWLY Bruins? Where you guys let up 8 frickin' goals? Letting the LAST placed team in the league beat you down like a bunch of mutts?

Yes, I did predict our team to lose by 3. Hopefully that's a motivator!

Light a fire under that big old fat ass of yours!!!
Response:

M U D L E A G U E

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 7th, 2008 @ 3:15PM


Any of you pansies plan on playing mud league this spring? I really think we should have 4 groups, no refs with two time slots every Tues night for 7-8 weeks. That way it would keep the cost down, and the fun level up. We really don't need the refs, we could have more of an open skate. This would be great in my opinion, especially for those that for scheduling reasons can't make twice a week. Post your response on here to give the guys running mudleague as much feedback as possible.
Response:

H M M M M

BY: kpark
Feb 12th, 2008 @ 12:09PM


Hey Marshy, that would be a great idea for a mid league before a real summer league, but seeing as their won't be any hockey from May until October I personally would like a real skate. But on the other hand, I busted up my knee again on Sunday night, and won't be skating until October anyways.

From what I've garnered, guys want a 10 game season instead of 14, which would put us every Tuesday night with a couple of Thursdays thrown in there.

What do you prefer?

Kelly
Response:

Kelly's vocabulary is growing!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 12th, 2008 @ 7:53PM


Wow. I never thought "contradistinctive" was a word before. Kelly has been going to night school at the local community college to help his writing style and expand his vocabulary. Nice job, Park! Don't feel that using big words for the hockey readers is contraindicated, because we're wicked smaaaaat!
Response:

10 is perfect, Kelly.

BY: hkydoc
Feb 12th, 2008 @ 7:55PM


Yeah, 10 games like that is perfect. I did at no time whatsoever mean to say you were a perfect 10.
Response:

Playoff implications

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 15th, 2008 @ 7:24PM


The game coming up this week, will definitely have some effect on the playoff scenario. If the Nords happen to fall to the Mighty Brew Crew, THEY would end up in third, with the right to play the "Little Blue Machine" Leafs. I would NOT wanna face those smurfs in the first game of the playoffs, talk about energy. They just don't quit out there. Anyone can win fellas, depends on who has the right combination of tenacious D, and a quick offense! Good Luck To All!
Response:

Nords will truimph!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 19th, 2008 @ 2:54PM


Get ready for a Nordiques victory to ensure 3rd place going into the playoffs! Time to start growing those playoff beards and bring your A-game, fellas! McDefense
Response:

Yaaaaahh, NORDS!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 19th, 2008 @ 2:56PM


GO NORDS! Hopefully we have at least 5 skaters and a goalie tonight... Big game for 3rd place vs. the Brewers tonight, eh.
Response:

How 'bout them there those Nords?!!?

BY: kpark
Feb 19th, 2008 @ 3:19PM


Well, I'm rooting for the Nordiques, but after watching you hosers play the past two weeks, myb bettin' money would be on the Brewers tonight, especially after then SCHALLACKED the hell out of the Bruins last week.

Bring your A game boys, you're in for a battle for 3rd.
Response:

Great game by both squads!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 21st, 2008 @ 7:14PM


The Nords-Brewers game was a great game by both teams and represented what the UVHL is all about. I would like to congratulate the Brewers for a hard-fought, classy, awesome game. It ended like it should have after three great periods - a tie, and it went to a shootout. As far as the Nords go, it looks like we're ready for the playoffs after some huge brain farts (or were they sharts?) the past few weeks and are back to Nordique hockey. Turner had his A-game and made some retaaaaaaded saves, and Bartline almost matched him at the other end. The myth of the gaping Bartline 5-holio spewed across the website by Kelly Park was a myth. The Brewers D could be the best overall D core in the league, and they were without Charette and Walshy had to cover in his absence and he did a great job on the blueline without Mr. "I'm just here to play defense". GREAT GAME BREW CREW and NORDS! Yah, UVHL!
Response:

Nords win as predicted...by ME!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 21st, 2008 @ 7:49PM


The Nords emerged victorious, as I anticipated (see above), but it was a great game and it went to a shootout. Turner was retaaaaaded yet again, and the Nords shook off the cobwebs after sucking for about three weeks in a row. See more in the Forum, eh. McDefense, OUT!
Response:

Nords shouldn't take Leafs lightly...

BY: hkydoc
Feb 24th, 2008 @ 9:26PM


Don't underestimate the Leafs, not for one minute. Be ready to sweat, work hard, and not be fully recuperated for your next shift against the Leafs - the hardest working team in the 5-year history of the UVHL. The Nords had better bring their A-game, or they'll be scrimmaging until the Mud League starts... GO NORDS! Yaaaaaahhh!
Response:

PLAYOFFS!!!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 26th, 2008 @ 4:13AM


This is by far my favorite time of the hockey season - PLAYOFFS! The only other thing that comes close is the excitement of that first couple of skates in September, putting on the pads and tieing up the laces after the golf season winds to a close. I'd love to hear how hockey and the UVHL excite you and have meant something to you over the past few seasons (except Bayley, because we've all seen WAY too much post-game...I just had a flashback, threw up in my mouth a little bit, and am definitely scarred for life...), so reply away to this Forum post on the eve of the 5th Whalen Cup Playoffs! I LOVE HOCKEY! UVHL, you had me at 'Hello'!!
Response:

I would have to agree McD

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 26th, 2008 @ 7:13AM


Although the Nords' playoffs started last week, with a huge win against the Brew-Crew. I too get fired up around this time of year. The only thing I wish I could change would be...a mini-series for each playoff matchup.( maybe best two out of three, in the regular time slot, 15-20 min games) One game just doesn't do it for me. It's kinda like the NFL playoffs, you win or you go home. The other thing is, why did Hadley decide to uproot my Tues. night ritual right before the end of the season? I mean, could a Brick-Oven Pizza/ Bar not wait until the Whalen Cup has been super-saturated in Bleu Cheese dressing? Ahhhhhhhhhh Bleu Cheeeeese! I guess Bentley's will have to welcome the Nords as Whalen Cup Champs!, They better have Chicken wings, or McD and I will have a fucking meltdown!!! Good luck to all, Bring on Da Leafs!!!
Response:

Great fucking game between Leafs & Nords, eh!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 26th, 2008 @ 10:26PM


Whew! I'm fucking exhausted! The Nords pulled one out of their ass since only 8 players and JT showed up on a snowy night to battle the Leafs with 11 skaters and LeLallier. It was 3-3 going into the 3rd period, and somehow the Nords pulled it off with, as a so called 'friend' of JT, said post-game that 'JT's C-game' was in full effect. HUH? No fuckin' way! It was an A-game from JT, no doubt about it! Turner made a retarded save on the Leafs' first shot on goal, and he nabbed several pucks out of the air, and played solid, composed, and brilliant. LeLallier was equally as impressive in net for the Leafs and it was a goalie's duel. Nords WIN 5-3. Both squads were without important players tonight, but it was equally affecting both teams, and it was a great hockey game. The Leafs have tons of heart. See you on the ice, eh!
Response:

HA HA HA HA!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 26th, 2008 @ 10:29PM


The Prick, The Dick and the Stick line? I fucking love it, Park! HILARIOUS!!!!!
Response:

What Game where you watching!!!!

BY: mhickey
Feb 29th, 2008 @ 11:48AM


I love Henry he's a staple on the Brewers, but I am pretty sure he only had an apple with no goals and Chris Adams had the four goals. Adams had an amazing game and was probably flying so fast you just couldn't keep up with him, on the ice or not your just slow!!! You must shower in the dark if you think my missed shot was the funniest thing you've seen in five years.


Response:

Whalen Cup Final

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 29th, 2008 @ 5:16PM


I thought I overheard someone saying that Tuck would have no players available for the scheduled Whalen Cup final game. If this is the case, I say have them play a scrimmage against The Brewers and forfeit. If Tuck were to beat the Brewers, then have no one there for the final, that would be ridiculous. I say, let's have a team that'll actually show up, and have some skaters out there that really want to win it. I would love nothing more, than to have a rematch against the Brewers. The skate hard, and are a great bunch of guys. Good luck to everyone, and Go Nords!
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Feb 29th, 2008 @ 6:44PM


Thanks for the compliment, that last game against the Nords was one of the best of the season,fast paced and clean, couldn't have been more fun. It would be easier to have the Brewer's win on Tuesday, but Tuck has had a great season as well and have an awesome balance between offence and stellar D. It is unfortunate that they won't be around for the final and should forfeit or play with who they have available....The games on Tuesday should both be great, and good luck to all
Response:

The final

BY: kpark
Mar 4th, 2008 @ 9:42AM


Unfortunately, it is true that Tuck will be on break for the finals. Due to Christmas & New Years falling on Tuesdays this year, we are pushed back a bit. Tuck has offered to buy some ice time at the end of March to play a final, if they do indeed win this evening.

I'm expecting a great game tonight though, so Brewers give them HELL so we don't have to worry about this.

PARK
Response:

I predict a Norewer-Brewers Whalen Cup final!

BY: hkydoc
Mar 4th, 2008 @ 1:12PM


It is official, my predciction is TWO upsets tonight in the semi-finals to give a Nords-Brewers Whalen Cup Championship match-up for 2007-08. Tuck and the Storm Queens are going down! YAAAAHHHHH! McDefense, OUT!
Response:

I predict a Nords-Brewers Whalen Cup final!

BY: hkydoc
Mar 4th, 2008 @ 1:13PM


Oops, typo in the title, eh.
Response:

Nords-Brewers final is brewing...

BY: hkydoc
Mar 4th, 2008 @ 1:16PM


Yep, I predict a Nords-Brewers final after TWO huge semi-final upsets tonight! McDefense, OUT!
Response:

I agree and am hopeful

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 4th, 2008 @ 1:35PM


That a Nords/Brewers final will be inevitable. I also think that Kelly is thinking like we always knew where his heart really lies. With his pals on the Storm Kings. Haven't any of you wondered why every single time we played the Kingers win or lose, Kelly was the one in THEIR dressing room, handing out high-fives or reach-arounds, or back rubs or whatever. I think the Nords will definitely be in tough tonight. But so will the Kingers. We should all give 110% every shift, and win every battle. We should also prove the" Co-Commish" in training wrong and pound the Kingers into the ice. Good luck to all tonight, keep your stick on the ice!
Response:

Nords-Brewers final is brewing...

BY: hkydoc
Mar 4th, 2008 @ 4:07PM


Nords and Brewers will emerge victorious on semi-final night and upset the Storm Queens and Tuck for a Nords-Brewers Whalen Cup final!!! Yaaaaahhh!
Response:

Okay, alright, so a Nords-Brewers 3rd Place game is brewing...

BY: hkydoc
Mar 4th, 2008 @ 10:38PM


I eat my words. I sit corrected. Tuck remains # 1. Nords-Brewers battle for the bronze and post-game beers next week, eh!
Response:

Storm Queens trump Nords 4-3 in epic UVHL battle...

BY: hkydoc
Mar 4th, 2008 @ 10:45PM


Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I was wrong and a minus-1 in the game, but it was a great game, and it was tied until 1:04 left in the contest when the Storm Queens pounced on a loose puck in front of JT like a 2 dollar crack whore going down on her dinner ticket. Great game, no need for the Nords to hang their heads, tied 3-3 until the late seconds, JT outshot 46-12 or something like that, Frenchy with a 56% save percentage. Congrats to the Kingers on a hard fought and clean semi-final, and on their Whalen Cup berth vs Tuck, whenever that may be... Great season Nords, and two awesome back-to-back playoff weeks. Lets continue the dynasty and take another bronze next week, eh! Yaaaaaaahhhh! McDefense, OUT!
Response:

Nords guaranteed another 3rd Place to their UVHL resume on Tuesday

BY: hkydoc
Mar 8th, 2008 @ 6:04PM


The Nords will mop up the ice with the Brewers on Tuesday and earn another UVHL bronze to put on their mantlepiece. Yaaahhhhh!
Response:

no hardware

BY: vtdownhiller
Mar 10th, 2008 @ 10:26AM


we're not in it for the hardware, just the delicious free victory beer
Response:

Mmmmmm...

BY: hkydoc
Mar 11th, 2008 @ 9:15AM


Beer tastes better being drunk from the Whalen Cup! I think we'll have to get a 3rd Place trophy mug...mmmmmmm!
Response:

Great Idea

BY: vtdownhiller
Mar 11th, 2008 @ 10:51AM


Let's get a Monster mug and write 3rd place on it and the losing team is responsible for keeping it full of Long Trail!
Response:

4th Place Nordiques

BY:
Mar 11th, 2008 @ 1:23PM


It will be a pleasure shalacking you chumps for 3rd place.
Response:

Nords emerge with UVHL Bronze (barely!)!!!

BY: hkydoc
Mar 11th, 2008 @ 11:02PM


GREAT FUCKING GAME tonight! Yet again, the Nords and the Brewers show what the UVHL is all about with a rubber match for 3rd Place. Who woulda thunk it? The Nords had 7 skaters for the first period, and 6 skaters for the 2nd and 3rd, and somehow they out-strategized and out-saved the dangerous Brewers. It was 2-2 at the end of the first; it was 5-2 Nords at the end of the 2nd' mid-way through the 3rd it was 7-4 Nords, and then suddenly it was 8-7 Nords in the dying minute of the game and the Brewers were pressing, but Turner was un-fucking-believable and carried the Nords to victory for post-game beers and bronze bragging rights! Coates had 7 points on 8 Nords goals, Poli Nightingale had 2 HUUGE goals (including the GWG), and Marshy delivered 2 early goals to give the Nords momentum and the ability to play with the lead, and captain Tao Smith played his BEST HOCKEY GAME EVER IN HIS LIFE to lead by example, and Kelly fucking Park made his return to the Nords line-up after babying a knee "injury" for three months. Will Meyer played the first period and then mysteriously bailed, but McDefense played the entire 2nd and 3rd periods and solidified the D, and Park controlled the play down low, bum knee and all. the Brewers were solid, and they are by far my favorite UVHL opponent ever, and they were a class act, and are a great bunch of guys to hang with post-game win or lose. Cheers to the Brewers! Post-game at Bentleys was saved by bartender extraordinaire Tom who kept us fed with 12 plates of wings (courtesy of the UVHL, of course) and full of liquid libations. Great job by refs Gary and Carl tonight, and all season, and a sincere congrats to Carl who is retiring and who will now be gracing Florida 6 months of the year with his golfing efforts (notice how I did not say expertise). Excellent season boys! See you on the ice in Muds, eh!
Response:

Best game EVER for the Nords?

BY: hkydoc
Mar 17th, 2008 @ 4:15PM


This could have quite possibly been the best game ever in the history of the Nordiques. 7 players playing their very best UVHL game ever on one night in the same game, holding off a dangerous, and motivated, high powered Brewers squad looking for their first taste of UVHL hardware. IT WAS AWESOME!!!
Response:

Storm Kings best with short bench...

BY: hkydoc
Mar 23rd, 2008 @ 8:28AM


Wow, what a game, what a travesty for the NorLeafs. Up 2-0 by virtue of the heriocs of Jared Condon in net, the NorLeafs squandered the lead and gave up 3 late unanswered goals to fall to a short Storm Kings bench with only 5, count 'em five, skaters who played the entire game against 9 NorLeafs. It did get chipphy, but it was good old-time hockey, and we all shook hands afterwards. Kelly Park re-injured his knee hopping the boards awkwardly, and he strained his pussy at the same time catching it on the edge. Post-game at Murphy's was solid with a strong contingent of NorLeafs, ValleyCats, double wings and fromage bleu! I can't wait until Tuesday... Congrats Kingers on a solid win.
Response:

Boneyard

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 24th, 2008 @ 3:58PM


There was officially 2056 chickens slaughtered on Tues to accommodate the heaping pile of wings consumed at Murphy's post-game. One patron was quoted as saying, " Oh My God, Are They Really Gonna Eat All Those? " I wanted to say something, but was too caught up in my own chicken-wing euphoria to speak. I was actually engulfed in Bleu-Cheese at the time and probably could not have spoke if I had to. Thanks to all for a great time, hope to see more of you out on Tues.!
Response:

Rumor has it.....

BY: kpark
Mar 25th, 2008 @ 2:50PM


I heard a nasty rumor that there are some photos making their way around the league of an un-named bald commissioner who plays for the Nordiques and weighs 350 lbs, that is actually eating live chickens behind Murphy's after the bar was closed. He had his own VAT of buffalo sauce and blue cheese dressing.

The photos are also under investigation for cruelty to animals.
Response:

Mmmmmm...wings!

BY: hkydoc
Mar 26th, 2008 @ 11:35AM


I am so glad to have Murphy's post-game! The wings are delish, and low-carb, and help me maintain my robust physique. I never eat more than 60 wings in one sitting, and I make sure I eat lots of celery, too. However, I have been known to drip fromage-bleu all over my shirt in the midst of Buffalo Wing extacy. The photos are real, but the cruelty to animals charge has been dropped due to lack of evidence. Oh, I'm a svelte 283.5 lbs and 36% bodyfat, by the way (I just lost 10 lbs), at an extremely CN Tower-like 5'8" and one-third. Just ask Crapser his data, oh, sorry, just ask "McDermott, Jr." his official UVHL Biggest Loser 2008-09 weigh-in stats from last night for the tale of the tape! Game On!
Response:

the pic

BY: kpark
Mar 27th, 2008 @ 11:55AM


Well.....some might say that the proof is in the pudding.....but I think the proof is in the Blue Cheese.


Response:

Definitely P O W

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 30th, 2008 @ 7:50PM


In my book, Al Sorrentino should be player any way you slice it. When I first moved here, Al could barely skate! His game has improved so much much, that I'd even consider trading a few unnamed players from the Nords AND a bag of pucks for Al. Those unnamed players will be named after the results of the Biggest Loser UVHL edition. Hats off to Al everyone, I'll definitely be having a beer, win or lose after the big NorLeafs/ Brewers matchup Tues. night!
Response:

Ooops, typo!

BY: hkydoc
Mar 31st, 2008 @ 5:53AM


238.5 lbs, eh, not 283.5 lbs - I may be Fat Bastard, but I'm not on Pelletier proportions!
Response:

Oldest POW?

BY: hkydoc
Mar 31st, 2008 @ 5:55AM


If big Al is older than Marty "Father Time" White, then that would make Al the oldest Player of the Week in UVHL history. Both are legit, by the way. We don't pass around pity POW nominations, and I've never even been nominated even though I'm a defensive stud... Congrats, Al!
Response:

THE FONZ

BY: kpark
Apr 1st, 2008 @ 1:15PM


I agree, The Fonz deserves that pat on the back and his free case of beer. I almost feel bad about the fact that I am going to LAY HIM OUT TONIGHT. The Brewers are going down tonight. I've got a few tricks up my sleeve:

1. Lock them out of the rink, we win by forfeit.
2. Slip ruffies in all of their pre-game beers...we win by forfeit.
3. Slip an extra Hundo to the refs to keep Bayley in the box all night.
4. Spark a fight between Isaac & Bayley.
Response:

Game write ups

BY: MASSHOLE
Apr 3rd, 2008 @ 8:16AM


Kelly has done a great job on the write ups, but takes to long. His mouth never stops before, during and after the game. I figure since he has so much to say that it would be done right away just like McD used to do. We as a professional hockey players look forward to his valuable insight so we can get ready for the next game. So Kelly get your hand off your stick and and out of your nylons and get the write up out there.
Response:

Ah....THE MASSHOLE IS BACK

BY: kpark
Apr 3rd, 2008 @ 3:00PM


Listen up you giant tub of lard, I'm getting on them. You are correct that my mouth is always running, and that is the issue, my mind is actually really slow compared to my mouth and I don't actually know how to write. So I have employed a little Chinese boy that does all of my transcribing for me.

You punks got lucky last night. I think Bayley ruffied my pre game beer, and that is why I didn't light BARFline up for 10 goals.

KP
Response:

Cool! Kelly is gonna trash you instead!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 3rd, 2008 @ 5:00PM


Yah! Kelly isn't going to pick on me this time! He is giong to pick on some other people and give me a break, because I'm an overly sensitive Canadian! (and because I played great, except when I let Garren Poirier sneak that puck between my legs for a shot on Turner on my first shift...I had to cover for Park ALL NIGHT on D because he was my inept D partner on one and a half legs! Oh, snap...now Park is going to retort and hurt my feelings again). McDefense, OUT!
Response:

Hey Kelly

BY: The Dark Canuck
Apr 12th, 2008 @ 2:10PM


Maybe I was wrong about thinking your man-crush was John Thomas, because CLEARLY Frenchy is your man. How else could someone get a P.O.W nod for 2G.A and 24 saves? Big Fucking Deal! JT gets more saves in the first period. Besides, without Artie, or Stu or Scully Frenchy would be as good as Swiss cheese out there. I will say however from time to time, he DOES make a great save, but definitely NOT a P.O W goalie. So, now that your secret's out, you guys might as well make it official. I on the other hand have NEVER had a P.O.W nod, I guess I'm just not good enough, or Sexy enough.
Response:

You are on Crack

BY: kpark
Apr 14th, 2008 @ 9:54AM


First of all, yes I do have an affinity for the Frenchman, and secondly any goaltender who posts a .917 save percentage in a men's league game DESERVES a POW nod. I mean Marty Brodeur only has a .913 save percentage for his career and he has professional hockey players in front of him who get paid to help. Frenchy's just got a bunch of goons who like to put his team on the penalty kill.

Additionally, maybe if you could get your fat ass to score a goal he wouldn't have been nominated for letting in 3 goals on 24 shots. I'm a one legged gimpy defenseman with speed like a week old pile of dried up crusty dog shit and I've got as many goals as you.

PUT IT IN GEAR Marshy, you have the entire weight of your homeland on your back looking for you to be the player that all of Canada thought you could be!!!

KAP
Response:

Ha ha ha ha! This write-up is AWESOME!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 14th, 2008 @ 6:09PM


PARK! I'm not even halfway through this write-up and I had to get up out of my computer porn chair three times laughing! HILARIOUS, and I'm not even done yet! Hey, where can I get a splash guard?
Response:

Best nicknames yet!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 14th, 2008 @ 6:14PM


This write-up features the BEST nickname assignments yet in the history of the Kelly Park write-up era! BRILLIANT! I loved the "only gettin' 2 miles per gallon of beer", too. Great job, Park! Worth the wait, as always!
Response:

Ha ha ha! Niiiiice!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 14th, 2008 @ 6:16PM


Funny stuff, fellas! Be careful, Overly Mean One vs. Overly Sensitive One...
Response:

You

BY: The Dark Canuck
Apr 15th, 2008 @ 12:59PM


Ok, I guess you've done it. You HAD to play the CANADA card. After that, nothing short of a Gordie Howe Hat Trick would be acceptable. For all you yanks, that means a goal, an assist and a penalty(preferably fighting). I'll also have to refrain from my newly-adapted pre-game doobie. It's just not as effective as I'd thought. Fun, but not efficient. I'll wait til I get home. So, looks like I'll be skating hard tonight boys, I hope I'll have someone to pass the puck to. See you punk-bitches at the rink.
Response:

....

BY: The Dark Canuck
Apr 18th, 2008 @ 2:52PM


So what if I like crack? Like you've never tried it...
Response:

That write-up was RETAAHHHHDED!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 21st, 2008 @ 10:19PM


Nice job, boys! Charette dumbed it down and made some funny comments, too! Park was on the rip and went on a rant on the bench, in the locker room, and in the write-up! GO NORLEAFS! We all make the playoffs, and anyone can win!
Response:

My $ is on the brewers for Mud League Champs, eh!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 22nd, 2008 @ 10:28PM


I'm puttin' my money where my mouth is, and it is on the Brewers for their first men's league title this spring in the UVHL Mud League. GO BREWERS!
Response:

Game Time

BY: MASSHOLE
Apr 23rd, 2008 @ 9:23AM


Are the games this Thursday or Next Tuesday
Response:

I'm RETAAAAAAAHHHDED, not retarded, eh.

BY: hkydoc
Apr 23rd, 2008 @ 1:02PM


Isn't it supposed to be RETAAAAAHHDED with a Boston accent when you are giving a compliment? It is? That is what I thought... So then why did Park say retarded instead? Oh, it wasn't a compliment, was it? I get it now! Ha ha, ho ho, hee hee. Nice one, Park! Better luck next spring, NorLeafs...
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Apr 23rd, 2008 @ 6:18PM


Look on the home page...C'mon get your head in the game!!
Response:

See ya next year!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Apr 29th, 2008 @ 2:23PM


Thanks to all the players that made the past hockey season a memorable one. I miss the UVHL already. I hope we can keep the competitiveness at the same level or higher next year. Hope everyone has a safe and fun-filled summer. See you on the ice! MARSHY!!!!
Response:

'B' League GLORY for McD, LeLallier, Nalette, and the CCM squad (and Carl)!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 29th, 2008 @ 9:18PM


Oh yes, hockey fans! There was a saving grace to the end of the season in the original Mud League with the fictional "Campion Cup" being bestowed upon the talented, but historically short-benched CCM squad. Six, count-em, six skaters from CCM (including last minute sub Nick Hall who was given permish from the Commish Dick Dodds to play only minutes before the game started) man-handled a hardworking and classy group of Ice Hawks, including the original Mud League Commish and brother John Dodds, for the bragging rights with a final score of 7-2. CCM went up 2-0 about one-third through the 54 minute run-time contest on two speedy and smooth Kevin Louzier goals. Louzier was the best player on the ice in the Championship game, bar none. LeLallier was superb in net, and saved one of his finest performances for the final game of the season, and had a shutout going until John Dodds broke the 5-0 CCM lead with about 12 minutes to go. McD and D partner Bill Morrison played the entire game on D while Louzier, Todd Nalette, Charlie Arnold and sub Nick Hall rotated through the 4 forward spots for CCM. Conspicuously absent from CCM were captain Jeff "Grambo" Graham who was out of town on "business" (i.e. jerking off in a hotel room to gay porn), perennial superstar in his own mind Kip "Game Winner" Oberting, the incredibly speedy two-way threat Greg "Goose" Gosselin, half-season busts Scott "My Shit Doesn't Stink" Peters and Roger "I'm Way Better Than You Ever Were, LOSER!" Demment, and the new guy Jason "Check out my ass in the parking lot, Amelia" Vallee. The Ice Hawks were without Marty "Father Time/I got 2 Player of the Game Hats in Montreal" White, and definitely missed his puck-control-circle-jerk-shoot-first-passing-is-for-pussies offense. It was a really good game, and CCM was just plain lucky to have Louzier and Nalette firing on all cylinders like it was a Hartford High 1998 scrimmage against the freshmen. The Dynamic Duo clicked well with Hall, and Arnold played the best hockey that I have ever seen him play in 11 seasons of morning hockey or Mud League. Arnold was strong along the boards, played great defensively, and fed pucks to the young bucks constantly using his hockey smarts all game. LeLallier stopped several great chances by the Hawks, including two breakaways, and one beauty tip in front just off the crossbar by the Commish, Dick Dodds. BJ Premore was solid in net for the Hawks, but he could not handle the onslaught of Louzier, Nalette and Hall. Most goals by CCM were patiently crafted or speedy dekes, and a pass or two in front, and "Beej" stopped almost every shot that came his way. Morrison and McDermott were SOLID on D for CCM, and played wicked smaaaaaaat, and had to because they didn't get a rest, and took a page out of the Peters-Demment Iron-Man Hockey Playbook. The final game of the night was lined by Tony Gove and Gary Laperle as they rightfully honored the great-great-great grandfather of referees, Carl Hatfield, by surprising Carl with the orange arm bands for the final game of his illustrious career. Carl is retiring, and we all owe him a debt of gratitude for years of service allowing us to play the game that we love. Tony and Gary both got choked up talking to me about it being Carl's last game before he "Officially" retires and moves to Florida to permanently take on the great off-season hockey sport of golf. Carl - thank you so much for all you have done for the UVHL, Mud League, and youth hockey in the Upper Valley over the past 165 years. It is sincerely appreciated and acknowledged. Carl's final going away present was to give Nick "Hockey Whore" Hall a phantom holding call with less than 4 minutes to go to ensure that Hall (who played at 6:20, 7:30, and 8:40) was kicked out of a new Mud League record 3 consecutive games due to the new original Mud League two strikes you're out policy! Nice one, Carl! Oh yeah...K2 finished 3rd in a shootout over the 4th place Northstars; the No-Names finished 5th; and I have no clue who finished 6th-9th (sorry, eh!). GREAT SEASON MUD LEAGUERS! SEE YOU ON THE COURSE, EH!
Response:

I LOVE THE UVHL! Yaaaaaahhh!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 30th, 2008 @ 12:02PM


I also want to say thanks to not only the players and refs, without whom the best adult hockey league in the world would not exist, but to Kelly F'n Park for stepping up this season and singlehandedly saving the UVHL from extinction. Everyone needs to know that without Kelly there would have been no UVHL for Season V, and that he deserves their never ending gratitude, nude photos of their wives/girlfriends, power of attorney, first born child, free beer for life, etc. THANKS PARK! GREAT JOB, COMMISH! I hope to see many of you on the golf course this spring/summer, so call or e-mail me for a round or two, and if you are gettin' the hockey itch in mid-August like I do then consider a Montreal tourney to get your hockey fix before we start Season VI, eh! Who's comin' with me? UVHL, you had me at 'hello'! - McD
Response:

BY: pb
Apr 30th, 2008 @ 5:29PM


wait... who's Kelly Park?
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
May 3rd, 2008 @ 5:11PM


you know...Brad Park's daughter..Kelly
Response:

Oh, yeah...

BY: hkydoc
May 6th, 2008 @ 9:38AM


Yes, I know the one you mean! Kelly is the prettiest one of all the Park girls! Luckily for Brad and the Mrs. that Kelly is a superb hockey player, even for a girl, and she can almost keep up with UVHL speed, too!
Response:

hockeydoc

BY: chat13
May 23rd, 2008 @ 7:16AM


shawn--here's th email you requested--
by the way v.n. article was thursday 5/15 front page sports section #2 lead
if you can't fiind it guess what i have lot's of copies.

carl
Response:

Everyone getting Hockey withdrawal yet?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jun 26th, 2008 @ 3:30PM


I know I am. Hopefully someone will have a skate here and there over the summer. If not, I guess Golf will keep me happy temporarily. Any word Kelly if we're gonna have a game or two to start the season at Campion? I can't wait. My money's on The Nordiques to win the Whalen Cup!
Response:

Where are you Marshy?

BY:
Jul 14th, 2008 @ 4:14PM


Marsh,

I have looked all over the stats and have not seen your name anywhere? Are you so dark you are non existant? Have you gone back to Canada?
Or is your game sinking fast?

Hmmmm....I'll keep looking.
Response:

huh?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jul 14th, 2008 @ 5:00PM


I haven't gone anywhere, who the hell is this anyway? If you're talkin stats, just wait til this season, I'm in better shape than I've ever been, so I'm definitely looking forwaard to Oct. Have a great summer though, Ciao...Marshy!!!
Response:

summer hockey

BY: ghadley
Jul 15th, 2008 @ 1:18PM


boys the summer league has been a nice little skate!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Trying to get the bruins up for the fall NOT SURE OUR PLANS YET!!!!! Any help will be nice,,,,,, trades are always welcome!!!! Pellitier is looking good playing softball this summe!?!?!?!?!?!?
Response:

ONE WAY JEFF NORTON LOOKING FOR A GAME VS MTN BOYS

BY: ghadley
Jul 15th, 2008 @ 1:25PM


The one way Jeff Norton is looking to play a game down in South shore vs a mtn team?? anyone interested in taking a trip to duxbury area for a scrimmage this late summer?? I'm sure we could get enough suburbans together to make the trip. HIs team is B+ type of skaters and he probab;ly will bring up a few surprises i'm sure... let me know
Response:

Sounds Great!

BY: jt
Jul 24th, 2008 @ 8:06PM


Hadley, I am truly missing hockey and would love to play. --JT
Response:

you betcha

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jul 25th, 2008 @ 5:31PM


Hadley, I am so ready to kick some ass on the ice, count me in. Especially if JT's going between the pipes. I know you've been biking, and fucking like a madman. But let's hope JT's in decent shape. Let us know when and where, then we'll talk.
Response:

McD is rrrrreaaaaadyyy!

BY: hkydoc
Jul 26th, 2008 @ 11:58AM


Hey, guys. I'd love to play as long as it is after the MCAT on Aug 26th. When is the projected date? I'm in Ontario until Aug 24th studying hard and pullin' the goalie. Keep me updated. E-mail me at: hkydoc@yahoo.ca
Response:

BY: acsriver
Aug 4th, 2008 @ 5:33PM


Are any old men going? I 'm in.
Response:

Season SIX is a comin'!!!

BY: kpark
Aug 6th, 2008 @ 12:23PM


Wow, the sixth frickin' season of the UVHL!!!! I can't wait. The Nords are gonna DESTROY YOU ALL!!! I'm planning on losing the extra 75 pounds I gained this summer and will be faster than Willy Meyer.

Let's get a discussion going about UVHL enhancements, both league & web related.


Response:

hey fat ass

BY: The Dark Canuck
Aug 12th, 2008 @ 8:13AM


I really hope you were kidding about the 75 pounds, because we'll trade ya for a round at Bend over Gently's after the game. So what IS happening this coming year? Are we going to four teams? When will the games be? If so, I say take out the 9:40 game. Either that, or have it at say, 7:00, and 8:35? That would work great for most I'm guessing. I spoke with Ryan Sinclair the other day, and the Cardigan faculty meetings are on Tues. nights. so he expects NOT to make it, as well as whatever other C.M.S teachers would play in the U. Is Will Meyer being awarded an expansion franchise? What else can we suggest, I dunno, get in the gym Kelly, it's not too late. Also, is there anywhere else other than Bentley's that we can go after the games that might offer Beer and wing specials, or something like that?
Response:

I've got the itch!

BY: hkydoc
Aug 12th, 2008 @ 1:33PM


Mid-August rolls around and I start thinking about hockey. Nice to know I'm not the only one! However, I must point out that it is only those with Canadian blood that are here talkin' hockey in August thus far. Well, Kelly and JT are in charge now, and I'm just here to put in my 2 cents as a former commish. My itch needs to be scratched, but it will have to wait until September when Campion puts in its ice. Who's comin' with me for some pre-season scrimmages?
Response:

I AM IN!!!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Aug 12th, 2008 @ 2:37PM


Let me know McD as soon as ice starts up somewhere...I will NOT be playing at Campion this year in the mornings. I played no more than 7-8 times last year. For 300 bucks, that was a HUGE mistake. That's roughly 40 dollars per skate. Total B.S. I will likely look to play on Sunday nights with Justin Barwood and the Potter guys if their icetime is decent. I am doing all I can to get in great shape, cardio is always tough to get in though, anyhoo...we'll see who's been draggin all summer. I guess if you call pounding Long Trail's all summer excercise, then some of you..cough.cough KellyPark.cough.cough. will be suckin wind for awhile.
Response:

Stop making excuses, Marshy!

BY: hkydoc
Aug 18th, 2008 @ 1:47PM


Don't even think about trashing my main hockey man Jay Campion! Just because you didn't get permission, or were too much of a pussy to get out of bed Tues/Thurs mornings that you didn't have to work does not mean that Jay deserves ANY flack for it! Take your balls out of the glass jar on the mantlepiece and put them back in your pants! The morning skate is AWESOME. Nobody wants to waste their money, so don't do it next year. You learned your lesson, but don't give anyone else shit about it. 'NUFF SAID! P.S. I still love you, you big sack of Canadian horseshit. YAAAAH! GO NORDS!
Response:

What?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Aug 19th, 2008 @ 8:23AM


McD, I never trashed your new boy-toy Jay Campion at ALL. The fact that the arena is called CAMPION arena,doesn't mean I'm trashing Jay. Yes, maybe I could have got my butt outta bed a couple more times, but I had to work almost all of the other times. And by the way, my balls are nestled nice where I like 'em. Jay is really a great guy, and the morning skate really is awesome most mornings...I never meant anything other than I basically wasted my money by not making it out more. Time to get your feet off of Mom's coffee table, put down the Kraft Dinner and take your ass out for a jog. I'll be waiting, in case you wanna hit the gym... or a couple beers!!!
Response:

Hey Kelly

BY: The Dark Canuck
Aug 22nd, 2008 @ 4:26PM


How about an update to the UVHL website...I know you're not, "working out too much, or riding a bike, or running or anything that involves the Quechee volunteer Fire Dept. from extracting your jelly-filled ass off the couch. I also know that laptop of yours is a dandy, and it really is great for things other than free porn sites... Keep it real...
Response:

Web site is dead.

BY: acsriver
Aug 30th, 2008 @ 4:54AM


Mr. Park: It’s about time to revive the web site, don’t you think? How about some news and information about the upcoming season?
Response:

OH, don't you worry FONZI

BY: kpark
Aug 31st, 2008 @ 3:36PM


Listen up "Tha Fonz", the website update will be up and running shortly!
Response:

On the IR til January

BY: ghadley
Sep 8th, 2008 @ 12:51PM


For the first time In my UVHL career I'm going to be sidelined. thats right twisted steel is going to miss his first games do injury (KELLY PARK KNEE DISEASE), so all you snipers Ive been stoning for the past years can now take a huge si of relief. But wait that doesnt mean I wont be screaming from the NEW GAMBLERS bench this fall and filming and recruiting, The only thing that is going to happen is I might just have a golden oppurtunity for the PHAT BASTARD weight contest now as twinkies and budweisers are really tasting good. Stay tiuned I will be traveling with my HOT rehad nurse full time and (yes marshy she is old enough) to all the pre and post game activities and will be looking forward to lacing them up for a few laps duing periods throwing out tshirts to our fans in the stands. OVER AND OUT!
Response:

BY: ghadley
Sep 8th, 2008 @ 12:52PM


yeah kelly get off you fat ass.
Response:

KMS GOLF TOURNAMENT

BY: ghadley
Sep 10th, 2008 @ 6:12PM


All right boys and gals we need your support. Come play some golf this fall at the KMS Athlete Scholarship Fund Golf Tournament Sept 26th. at Green Mountain National Golf Course in Killington Vermont. Were looking for a few good teams from the UVHL. Email me or nicole to sign up. $125 per person with cart and lunch and cocktail reception.

Nicole can be reached at nkondziela@killingtonmountainschool.org or myself at ghadley@vermontsportsalesagency.com

Thanks
Response:

Lost your Cannuck?

BY: paldrich
Sep 13th, 2008 @ 10:23AM


Marshy + McD I think you have lost some of your cannuck. Here in ontario, we played all summer and we have our "offseason" (3 weeks) starting next week before the winter season goes balls out. Just enough time to get the gear freshend and repaired. Best of luck this season guys.
Response:

Gimme a Fuc*&^ break Hads

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 16th, 2008 @ 9:29AM


Hads, the last time I checked, there weren't any welfare kids going to KMS. Are you serious that they actually need a fundraiser? How much does KMS cost per year? I'm sure the parents of those kids are certainly NOT hurtin for cash. 125 bucks is a lot of dough...Maybe I should start a golf tourney every year, charge a ridiculous amount of money, and put the money right in my pocket, that sounds great! Now fuck off, I got work to do...
Response:

Pick Up @ Campion?

BY: kpark
Sep 16th, 2008 @ 10:54AM


Hey, is anyone interested in possibly getting a pickup at Campion over the next couple of weeks? I'm dying to get on the ice. They have a bunch of ice to rent at $170 / hour. I'm looking primarily at times that are after 8pm.

The plan is to get 20 guys there, which would cover ice & some beers.

Kelly
Response:

YUP

BY: MASSHOLE
Sep 16th, 2008 @ 2:24PM


Get it going Bee-arch. I can't wait to school you. With my 3 mph speed and stone hands you will be toast. Get it done ASAP.
Response:

GOOD

BY: kpark
Sep 16th, 2008 @ 2:29PM


Hey, round up some players! OH, and let's get some TRASH TALKING GOING. Are you still pushing 300 LBS??!?!?!
Response:

yup

BY: vtdownhiller
Sep 19th, 2008 @ 5:24PM


Open stick in Rutland ends this Tuesday, I would make an effort to come over
Response:

I agree, get it done

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 21st, 2008 @ 7:02PM


I am totally IN. I am just about ready to hit the ice. Let me know ASAP...
Response:

Lets do it!

BY: hkydoc
Sep 23rd, 2008 @ 8:18PM


There was ice ALL NIGHT tonight at Campion unused from 7:10 PM on. Where were we? Not on it! For whatever reason, I don't know...We should have started tonight! Wah! Wah! Wah! Lets get a scrimmage or two in before the puck drops for real, eh!
Response:

Pick up on 9/30 @ 8:20pm!!!!

BY: kpark
Sep 24th, 2008 @ 7:57AM


Hey guys, The big Canuck, Greg Marsh, has purchased an some ice on Tuesday night, September 30th @ 8:20pm. $10 a guy and we are looking for 20 skaters. I think JT has already confirmed that he is in as well.

The first 20 skaters are in, so email me to let me know if you are in @ kpark@parkcreative.com

Kelly
Response:

10 and counting

BY: kpark
Sep 24th, 2008 @ 10:55AM


Alright, we've already got 10 plus 1 goalie:
1. Marsh
2. Park
3. Marrazzo
4. Meyer
5. "The Nightmare" Nightingale
6. Gaede
7. Gaede's brother
8. Charette
9. McDefense (well half of him 'cause he lost 135 lbs)
10. O'Neil

AND TURNER in net so far.
Response:

C'mon boys!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 24th, 2008 @ 2:41PM


We need at least 8 more guys for Tues. Tao, are you in? What about you Bartline? What about Sorrentino? Casavant? Kirk? I really don't want more than 20 guys, but a couple extra's better than not enough. Coates? What about Roger Philips? Tom Dakai? C'mon boys this is essential to get out a couple times before we start, shake that rust off boys!
Response:

Up to 14

BY: kpark
Sep 24th, 2008 @ 2:44PM


Marshy, we've got 14 now:

11. Jordan McGee
12. John McGee
13. Dr. Death (Roger Phillips)
14. Danny Boy Jones
Response:

Up to 15

BY: kpark
Sep 24th, 2008 @ 2:55PM


15. Gary Laperle
Response:

nice

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 24th, 2008 @ 4:42PM


keep em comin, I think we should cap it at 22 skaters, any more is not enough ice time.
Response:

16 & 17

BY: kpark
Sep 24th, 2008 @ 6:11PM


16. Nick "THE STICK" Bayley
17. "THE MASSHOLE" Danny Charette
Response:

18th HOLE

BY: kpark
Sep 24th, 2008 @ 8:42PM


18. Joey "The Mute" Hayes
Response:

19th has confirmed

BY: kpark
Sep 25th, 2008 @ 12:52PM


19. Tao "Killer" Smith

Only one spot remaining. Maybe I'll auction off that last spot......hmmmm. Something like, "Bid on a chance to have an elegant night of skating with Quechee's own, Kelly Andrew Park."


Response:

Enough is enough

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 25th, 2008 @ 1:11PM


Guys we definitely have enough guys for Tues. PLEASE DO NOT BRING FRIENDS!!! I know everyone will NOT appreciate if too many guys show up, next time first come, first plays... See you out-of-shape bums at the rink.
Response:

20 Down ZERO to go

BY: kpark
Sep 25th, 2008 @ 2:38PM


Hey guys, we have our 20th:

20. Christian "Pipes" Isaac

If you didn't make the top 20 but would like to fill in when one of these losers get told by their wife / girlfriend that they can't play hockey, email me at kpark@parkcreative.com

Kelly
Response:

dumbass

BY: vtdownhiller
Sep 25th, 2008 @ 5:36PM


you listed charette twice...8,17
Response:

Hey Park

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 25th, 2008 @ 7:09PM


Do we have 20? or is there another Charrette I haven't met?
Response:

Oops, back to 19

BY: kpark
Sep 26th, 2008 @ 5:43AM


Scratch one of the Charettes off.
Response:

I think it's time

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 26th, 2008 @ 5:41PM


Let the trash talk fly boys...it only improves morale and creates more competitiveness. I'd like to get everyone's pre-season predictions, here's mine, at least for game 1.

Gamblers vs. Whalers: Well, first I think that Will Meyer's breakthrough season as an Owner/Player will be overshadowed by doping allegations that he provided his ENTIRE team with HGH,(not B-12 injections as he initially claimed). Although what was left of Hadley's rag-tag bunch of ice-hellions could use all the help they need, I think they'll do just fine. The Brewers wil no doubt be ready, as the dynamic duo of Nick Bayley and Christian Isaacs will be out in full force alongside Al " The Ageless One " Sorrentino. PB between the pipes will no doubt be looking to keep Meyer and his minions at bay.

Tuck vs. Kingers: I'm guessing the reason we're having trouble booking ice times is because Tuck has practically blacked out any availability due to their rigorous pre-season training. I'm not sure what kind of team the Kingers are expecting back, but I'm sure "Father Time", Marty White will be ready for whatever.

Nords vs. Whalers: The Whalers returning in what front office calls a " Re-building Phase " will no doubt be looking to prove that they can compete with the high intensity caliber the UVHL is known for. Returning from retirement, Team Captain Sean " The Smurf Whisperer " Casavant will definitely have the tough task of gelling a team that has actually scored less than Tony Gove, and he fell into the net. JK smurfs, I mean Whalers...


Good Luck to all, and see you fags on the ice.
Response:

oops

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 26th, 2008 @ 5:43PM


first game is Gamblers vs. Brewers, not Whalers
Response:

($10 hour) Get paid to work the Ibex Tent Sale!!!!

BY: kpark
Sep 30th, 2008 @ 12:47PM


Hey guys, my company ibex is having our annual tent sale on Columbus Day weekend. We may need a couple of people to help with stocking / organization, etc. It pays $10 / hour in cash or TRADE. Great place to get some expensive Christmas gifts. I think we are looking for people for Friday, October 10th anytime between 6am and 6pm.

Let me know if you are interested.

kpark@parkcreative.com
Kelly
Response:

hey Park

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 30th, 2008 @ 10:21PM


Can U pick me up something at the sale? anything XL, seriously, I'll trust you'll get me something decent...I'll be in Canada for the wedding of the century, so I can't be there. But my Ibex shak I have Does NOT fit at all, take it and the 10 bucks you OWE me, and I'll give you the diffence, I'll call you, later
Response:

BY: ghadley
Oct 1st, 2008 @ 10:58AM


ooooooooooooooooooooooooo $10 dollars a hour where do i wait in line?
Response:

HADLEY!

BY: kpark
Oct 1st, 2008 @ 11:02AM


Hadley, you're still alive? Won't you just fall off the face of the earth already. PLEASE!
Response:

i think its time!!!

BY:
Oct 8th, 2008 @ 3:20PM


Gamblers are going to run away with the league this year!!!
Response:

SO ITS LESS THEN A WEEK BEFORE THE START

BY: goaliem31
Oct 9th, 2008 @ 9:39AM


so its less then a week till the start of the season ans i am disappointed that there isn't more trash talking started... time to wake up boys and let the trash start flying!!!
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Oct 9th, 2008 @ 6:10PM


confidence is very high in our camp....
Response:

Someone's definitely high, that's for sure

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 10th, 2008 @ 8:07AM


I am really happy with amount of Nords that showed up for the pre-season skates at Campion, it will really help to shake some of the summer lack of activity for some. If I can help myself from falling down some more, I might actually have a great game, once or twice. Maybe I should try sharpening my skates, yeah that'll work. Good luck to all(Nords) in week one! The rest of you fags had better get primed up for gametime, oh, and Drew...I still love you
Response:

Kelly, what the fuck?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 16th, 2008 @ 5:24PM


Dude, I like Jered and all, but a 5 goal against performance is in no way cause for a P.O.W nod. Is there some hidden agenda here?
Response:

No agenda my man

BY: kpark
Oct 16th, 2008 @ 5:26PM


Hey bud, no agenda, but from talking to the Gamblers and watching the game myself, he was ON. Had a solid 46 saves. I don't care you give up 15 goals and have 46 saves. In Men's league, that's a pretty good save percentage.

Not as impressive as a shutout on 26, or 7 points out of 9 goals from Turner & McGee respectively. But that is why I put it up to the masses to vote. This is a democracy my man, this ain't Canada!

KP
Response:

Just added, Add your own profile picture!

BY: kpark
Oct 17th, 2008 @ 8:45AM


Hey guys, I added some new functionality that allows you to add in your own profile picture, crop it and save it to the site. This can be done in both the Personal Settings for the forum and then you can save another photo as your headshot by logging into your Player Profile through My UVHL.

If you upload a good photo, post it here so we know you did and and can check it out.

KP
Response:

Love the Whalers

BY: kpark
Oct 17th, 2008 @ 10:00AM


In all reality, I love playing the Whalers. Even though they didn't show up for this game, they generally play a fast paced and clean game. Great group of guys too, but their scouting department is SHIT. You guys need to fire your entire scouting team, and rebuild your farm system from the ground up.

The Nords currently hired an eastern European scout as well as have a entire team scouting Northern Africa & Mongolia for talent. But that is just what the Nordiques do! Make GOOD decisions.

I'm looking forward to the next game against you guys!

KP
Response:

Kelly, what the fuck?

BY: goaliem31
Oct 17th, 2008 @ 11:01AM


man i was as surprised as anyone to see my name up there.. trust me!!
Response:

Enjoy

BY: habman
Oct 17th, 2008 @ 12:52PM


Thanks Kelly... at least there is one good reason to like the Habs for some of you now.
Response:

YOWZA!!!

BY: kpark
Oct 17th, 2008 @ 12:54PM


MMMMM, very very nice.
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Oct 17th, 2008 @ 4:21PM


I will say that the score should have been alot higher...both goalies were great, Jarod stood on his head...He deserves the nod
Response:

McD you lazy Bastard

BY: kpark
Oct 18th, 2008 @ 1:27PM


Please give McDermott a rash of shit for not having this game writeup done yet. He was sick and didn't even work all week. Perfect time to do some write ups.

IS HE REALLY THE COMMISH!?!?!?!? OR JUST AN EMBARASSMENT!!!

KP
Response:

Nicely Done McDermott

BY: kpark
Oct 18th, 2008 @ 9:53PM


Good first write-up of the season buddy. I loved the part about you muffin-topping out of the gambler's European Uniforms! That's something I'd LOVE to see. And may be WILLING to pay to see.

This was an AWESOME opening game for the season. The Gamblers will be a very competitive team this year, but looked a little bit off in game one. Not to mention they were playing against a SOLID Brewers squad. Dr. "McNoPass" Bayley potted the trick of course, and no assists to boot. He did have a SICK goal on Condon in the 2nd when he broke in all alone and pulled a Lemieux on Condon. For those of you not aware of "The Lemieux", it is when a player dekes across the goalie to his forehand, then throws the puck back to his backhand, tapping it to just slide along slowly past the sliding goalie.

KP OUT
Response:

Just testing

BY: kpark
Oct 19th, 2008 @ 10:22AM


Testing to make sure that it will show multiple game comments on the homepage.
Response:

Test #2

BY: kpark
Sep 11th, 2014 @ 9:40AM


Append this to #1
Response:

Test #3

BY: kpark
Sep 11th, 2014 @ 9:40AM


Append this to #1
Response:

Test #6

BY: kpark
Sep 11th, 2014 @ 10:41AM


Append to Test #3
Response:

Test #4

BY: kpark
Sep 11th, 2014 @ 10:32AM


Append to Parent
Response:

Test #5

BY: kpark
Sep 11th, 2014 @ 10:32AM


Append to #4
Response:

McD is....

BY: hkydoc
Oct 19th, 2008 @ 2:17PM


DEFINITELY a second rate commish and a total EMBARASSMENT!
Response:

Time to cut McD

BY: hkydoc
Oct 19th, 2008 @ 2:18PM


Looks like the Nords don't need me anymore...time to send me to the B league!
Response:

Thanks, eh

BY: hkydoc
Oct 19th, 2008 @ 2:21PM


I appreciate the kudos, Park. Nice job on the Nords-Whalers write-up on your part. Bayley had better watch out because I think Condon will take him out at the knees the next time he tries that move!
Response:

Sacre bleu!

BY: hkydoc
Oct 19th, 2008 @ 2:22PM


Mon Dieu! Elle est tres sexy, non? J'aime les Habs en plus maintenant!
Response:

Do NOT

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 19th, 2008 @ 3:00PM


Go to the "B" league McD. I know that the NO Names give you reach-arounds in the shower. but you can still compete at our level. I'm sure you have at least a few more good seasons? Besides, if we didn't get to see the bleu-cheese dressing streaming down your face after a boneyard of chickens maliciously gave up their life for your addiction that is B U F F A L O -----------W I N G S !!!!
Response:

Tryout in Week 2

BY: kpark
Oct 19th, 2008 @ 3:15PM


McD, we're willing to give you a tryout in week 2 for the season. We are not sure you can compete in the UVHL at your new weight. Down 25 lbs may hurt your game. But rumor has it that you annihilated 1,000 wings over the weekend!

KP
Response:

The rumors are TRUE!

BY: hkydoc
Oct 19th, 2008 @ 3:43PM


How did you know it was 1000 wings? That is EXACTLY how many I devoured since Friday night! However, my ass is on fire with Buffalo Sauce... I prefer the Nords reach-arounds. Everything is just better in the A league!
Response:

Just the Nords?!?!?

BY: kpark
Oct 20th, 2008 @ 1:22PM


Can we get ANYONE else to contribute to the Game Comments & Forum other than Nordiques?
Response:

Mondays

BY: habman
Oct 20th, 2008 @ 6:20PM


I just realized... Mondays are so much better now. UVHL action is just one day away!
Response:

HALLELUJAH BROTHA

BY: kpark
Oct 20th, 2008 @ 6:39PM


I definitely agree. Mondays are always good for a little UVHL.com and Trash Talking as well. Now if I can only get myself into shape faster it would be REALLY enjoyable.

KP
Response:

My prediction!

BY: kpark
Oct 21st, 2008 @ 7:44AM


Nordiques 27, Tuck 1
Response:

My prediction...

BY: hkydoc
Oct 21st, 2008 @ 9:26AM


Park will dipsy doodle and cough up the puck at least three times, O'Neil will miss a pass or two looking at his own reflection in the plexiglass, Marshy will hurt someone with a waist-high-east-west-slapshot-pass, McDermott will cough up a chicken wing and slip on some blue cheese, Smith will lose more face-offs than he will win and will have a great sweat with the guys, Nightingale will be a nightmare on RW, Willis will just want to have fun, Phillips will drill somebody with a wicked wrister, Coates will have a hockey smile, Dakai will pummel any Tuckie that bodychecks him, Turner will have a minimum of one total fucking meltdown in net at his own players, the McGee brothers will be in awe of the Nords' total dysfunction on the ice and in the locker room.
Response:

Ha! Penetration

BY: kpark
Oct 21st, 2008 @ 9:41AM


I really liked the "Penetration" analogy, laughed my ass off, or for you texting queers LMAO. Not that there is anything wrong with that!
Response:

sweet

BY: kpark
Oct 21st, 2008 @ 10:25AM


McD, you think I'll cough up the puck 3 times? ONLY 3 TIMES. Thanks bud. I thought I'd cough it up at least 3 times in the first shift.

KP
Response:

Just the Nords?!?!?

BY: goaliem31
Oct 21st, 2008 @ 3:38PM


i tried and fail miserably!!! hahaha

although i have to say putting back some beers and wings with McD has been a long time coming since the end of mud season...
Response:

BY: goaliem31
Oct 21st, 2008 @ 3:39PM


OH
and on the record...



no i will not be taking anyone out at the knees!!!

unless deserved!! lol!!
Response:

BY: goaliem31
Oct 21st, 2008 @ 3:41PM


well...

all i can say is that i think Kelly has gay tendencies!!! HAHAHA
Response:

Hmmmm, The Deeks, a contender?!?!?

BY: kpark
Oct 22nd, 2008 @ 10:16AM


After last nights games, I'm gonna have to say that the Nordiques are contenders. The Kingers lost BIG 12-5 to a Doctor-less Brewers squad. They were missing their franchise player in Robbie Barker & no Tommy Scull on defense, but the Brew Crew were sans-Bayley and Isaac.

The Nords rolled 8-1, and LOOKED solid. Hopefully it isn't just a fluke, but the team looks good. Nice job last night boys.
Response:

WOW

BY: kpark
Oct 22nd, 2008 @ 11:06AM


Fletcher had 6 goals & 3 assists. Funny, I saw Chris Johnson at the bar and all he mentioned was the 2 goals he scored. Way to go CJ!!!!!!
Response:

Scale!!

BY: goaliem31
Oct 22nd, 2008 @ 2:17PM


Doc don't for get to bring your scale next week!!! time to get my fat ass down some!!!
Response:

BY:
Oct 22nd, 2008 @ 10:10PM


DON'T CALL US THE WINLESS WHALERS!
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Oct 24th, 2008 @ 6:52PM


Completely taken out of context....As we all know, Park was bombed out of his gourd , hitting on some blonde law student and had buffulo sauce still dripping off his chin.. I'm surprised he remembered anything I said at all.
Response:

How much time do you need?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 24th, 2008 @ 7:27PM


McDermott, where in the world are those write-ups? I would LOVE to read more about those AMAZING Nords, that are ON FIRE!!! I mean, last time I checked, youdidn't wwork THAT much, is there any time left efter Redtube.com?
Response:

Taken out of context?

BY: kpark
Oct 25th, 2008 @ 7:10AM


CJ, I don't think it was taken out of context, this was your EXACT quote. "Yeah we demolished the Kingers like 2 or 3 to something. I'm not really sure how many goals they had because they sucked!!!! Actually I'm not really sure how many goals we scored either, but I'm pretty sure I had both of our teams goals. I think we won 2 - 1 and I had the game tying goal and the game winner. Man, if we only had 10 more of me on the ice we would be SO GOOOOOD." He then put raised his Strawberry Daiquiri in the air and said, "Here's to wishful thinking." It was a pretty weird one way conversation!

KP
Response:

Marshy, I AGREE!

BY: kpark
Oct 25th, 2008 @ 7:20AM


I'm pretty close to pulling ALL commissioner responsibilities from McNoShow. There is NO excuse to not have at least 1 write-up done before the weekend.
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Oct 25th, 2008 @ 7:21AM


Yes I remember it now, that was the exact thing you said to me...only it sounding like a slurry of words run through the spin cycle on medium, but it's all coming back to me now...I won't lower myself to repeat the things you were saying about Tao
Response:

BY: goaliem31
Oct 25th, 2008 @ 11:23AM


Kelly you are gong to be crying after the game on tuesday.. "YOUR GOING TO GET LIT UP!!!"

your quote is going to ring true but, the glove will be on the other hand!!! LOL
Response:

I need more time!

BY: hkydoc
Oct 26th, 2008 @ 5:29PM


Yeah, yeah, yeah...110%, no excuses, go hard or go home, git 'er dun, blah, blah, blah.
Response:

Nordiques will go 3-0

BY: hkydoc
Oct 28th, 2008 @ 1:29PM


It will be within 2 goals, but the Nords will emerge victorious tonight if they take the Gamblers seriously, because the Gamblers can play even if their team game isn't established yet.
Response:

Shouldn't it be WHA instead of MPL?

BY: hkydoc
Oct 28th, 2008 @ 1:30PM


C'mon, Park! They are the WHALERS now, not the Maple Leafs!
Response:

Tuck needs to show up

BY: hkydoc
Oct 28th, 2008 @ 1:31PM


C'mon Tuckies! Get your whole team there and give the Brewers a good game! I know you've got it in you, dammit!
Response:

Agreed

BY: kpark
Oct 28th, 2008 @ 1:41PM


But this could be the week the Gamblers put it all together. "The Milkman" Marrazzo & "Mighty Mouse" Meyers are a scary twosome. Condon has been talkin' some smack though, so I may have to rope one off of that ugly mug of his to show him just who's BOSS. CONDON, I KNOW YOU'RE READING THIS. I'M COMING FOR YA!!!!!
Response:

BY: habs101
Oct 30th, 2008 @ 6:51PM


yo
Response:

Lake Placid

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 31st, 2008 @ 7:50PM


Boys, I am seriously considering entering the Labatt's Adult Tourney Jan. 31- Feb 2. I would like to have 12 skaters and a goalie, with possibly a back-up in case shit happens. I have currently 4 players from Ontario committed to coming, which are really good skaters. I would ideally love to have only top-level UVHLers, but I also know how important character guys are to having a good time as well as winning. Anyone interested please e-mail me at Gmarshy77@gmail.com. Time is limited, and it the tourney is on a first-come, first-served basis. So therefore I want to get the entry in ASAP. Accomodations can be discussed later, but are entirely up to us, they are NOT included. So, get on it boys, MARSHY!!!
Response:

McD out

BY: hkydoc
Nov 2nd, 2008 @ 8:57PM


Hey, Bro. I just checked Colleen's hockey schedule and she has 2 games that weekend, so I am out (unfortunately). Count me in for a tourney after her season is over - March, April or May. - McD
Response:

Marshy playing his best UVHL hockey ever?

BY: hkydoc
Nov 2nd, 2008 @ 9:03PM


Greg Marsh, the Butcher of Guelph, is possibly playing his best hockey ever since he came to the UVHL. This 2006 UVHL Biggest Loser competition winner has shed 10 more pounds and is doing all sorts of off-ice training, including pylometrics. Already a big man, Marshy is a lean and scary machine, and he is playing with intensity, is BACK CHECKING (believe it or not), doing things at both ends of the ice, is clicking with his linemates Snaggletooth Coates and the Dirty Dentist, and is actually taking off with the puck. Always blessed with a great shot and ridiculously hard passes, often waist-high, Marshy is hitting the net, scoring, and is getting assists, too. He currently sits 4th in UVHL scoring after week #3. He has been one of the biggest keys to the Nordiques' early success, and this kind of play is needed from the Dark Canuck if the Nords expect to earn their third Whalen Cup.
Response:

I don't know what to say?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 2nd, 2008 @ 9:15PM


First of all McD, Thank you. You had me at Hello... And secondly, I will say, that I wanna thank all the little Hulkamaniacs for supportin me all these years! No, but seriously...I have found that fitness and total strength and flexibility really improve speed and reaction time. All I can hope is that it translates into a Nords win week after week.
Response:

SUNDAY NIGHT MEN'S LEAGUE

BY: mhickey
Nov 4th, 2008 @ 10:55AM


Hello to all UVHL'ERS
For sure as some of you have predicted, I am missing the UVHL, but having three boys all playing hockey on three different teams you can only imagine how often I am at the rinks in Rutland. Due to practice conflicts I can not make it to Union on Tuesday Nights so I have chosen to play in the Rutland Fieldhouse Men's League on Sunday Nights. The league is being headed up by former Nordique Star Richie Mckenna and he is looking for players. They presently have 4 teams, with limited numbers on the bench. Game Times are 8:00 and 9:30pm all games are at the Rutland Regional Fieldhouse and we have a 20 game schedule with playoffs. It 's obviously not the UVHL lord knows there is no men's league as good as the UVIE. But I know some of you guys could use an extra night skate. Call Richie at the rink for further info 775-3100 or reply and I'll get you more info. GO BREWERS!!!!!!!!!
Response:

Game Time!!!

BY: kpark
Nov 4th, 2008 @ 11:18AM


Not sure about you guys, but this should be ONE HELL OF A GAME. I can't wait.

KP
Response:

BY: goaliem31
Nov 4th, 2008 @ 12:07PM


your probly right... i might have a few beers and come back to check up on you guys to make sure no one is dead...
Response:

Big Whale Story

BY: PaleWhale
Nov 5th, 2008 @ 8:06AM



If there is a blueish mammal weighing 20tons in the middle of the living room, when should it be acknowledged? Please don't respond with a correlation to past or present Whales that in the past have acknowledged a slight weight problem.
Response:

Beware of the Whale

BY:
Nov 5th, 2008 @ 8:26AM


If people have not realized it, the LEAFS are Dead they got ate by a Whale and the Whale is no-one to mess with.....and the Whale is only getting stronger.
Response:

BY: goaliem31
Nov 5th, 2008 @ 11:41AM


well at least no one was killed...

but at one point i thought i saw someone trying to take their skate off to try and stab a guy with his skate... but i must have been seeing things cause it looked like Kelly Park!!!


GOON!!!!
Response:

Nords dismantle the Storm Queens

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 5th, 2008 @ 4:03PM


Last night's game was no doubt a hard-fought battle. After plenty of back-and-forth end to end rushes the Nords emerged as the victor. I will absolutely NEVER give a certain goalie ANY credit at all, after his numerous attempts at pleading his case (whining) to the ref. I'm sure most of us have a split down the middle between having fun and competitiveness. But last night I'm not sure the Kingers remembered how to have fun having their backs to the wall. It really didi get quite chippy after the "French Debacle", but the Nords persevered, winning 7-5. Clearly the team to beat, although the true test will be next week when the Nords attempt to run the table, and go 5-0. Also, I'm pretty sure I saw someone in the crowd throw up a 9.5 sign after another Leroy dive. It was absolutely pathetic to see someone that supposedly played D1 hockey, behave like a little baby. How hard can it be to make the St.Lawrence team? You could literally put a monkey on a line with Sinclair and Barker and get a couple points I'm sure.
Response:

Ah The Marshy

BY: kpark
Nov 5th, 2008 @ 7:20PM


Harsh words from the big man......but yet so true. It was an ugly game, from both sides. The Kingers NEED TO either clean up their game, or stop bitching about the calls against them. In all reality, the penalties called were 5 for the SK and 4 for the NORDS. And the refs said that they let the Kingers get away with ALOT of shit.

Solid effort Nords. 4 and Oh is a hell of a start.

KP
Response:

BY: habs101
Nov 5th, 2008 @ 7:47PM


someone needs to correct something here. Was the game 3-2 or 4-2? It says 4-2 but only shows three goals scored by the so-called whale.
Response:

Fixed

BY: kpark
Nov 5th, 2008 @ 8:42PM


My bad, somehow I forgot to add the empty netter in there! Solid game from the Whale though!!!
Response:

No Empty Netter

BY: PaleWhale
Nov 6th, 2008 @ 8:54AM


There was a big guy in big pads in between red pipes when this goal was scored! Give us some credit please :-)
Response:

BY: habs101
Nov 6th, 2008 @ 1:38PM


well at least the scoring has been figured out? EMPTY NET, NO EMPTY NET? KPARK I do like your picture but it would be better if she had a habs jersey on.
WHATS GOIN ON WITH TUCK? COME ON.
Response:

It's true

BY: kpark
Nov 6th, 2008 @ 9:40PM


Man, if I could have gotten that skate off, I would have drilled Leroy. Good thing those laces were on tight, I can't afford a lawsuit right now!!!!!!
Response:

WHALERS vs. BREWERS write-up

BY: kpark
Nov 6th, 2008 @ 9:42PM


I just posted the Whale V. Brew write-up. DAMN IS IT GOOD!
Response:

Nice write-up, Park!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 7th, 2008 @ 1:50PM


Another hilarious, ball-busting, insulting, and historically accurate UVHL game write-up from none other than the other-other-Commish, Kelly F'n Park! I've got a new nickname for Gary... Gary "Laperle Necklace". HA! Nice goal, Gary! Way to upset the Brew Crew, Whalers. A new look, a new feel, and a new attitude for the Whale.
Response:

What? No write-up yet?

BY: hkydoc
Nov 7th, 2008 @ 1:51PM


Fair is fair, and I'm bustin' YOUR balls this time, Park! Get on it! Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Response:

Good prediction, eh!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 7th, 2008 @ 1:53PM


I just read the pre-game, and you called it almost perfectly!
Response:

I just don't know what to say about this one...

BY: hkydoc
Nov 7th, 2008 @ 2:04PM


This was a weird game, to say the least. The Kingers were missing players, but had more than enough talent to score 5 goals and win. The Nords played down for the first time this season and looked flat at many points in the game, that is for sure. Pat Turcotte scored a NASTY goal, probably the best goal I have seen all season, and it was legit because it was a breakaway on JT, unequivocally the best UVHL goalie ever (there, I said it - happy now?). If Scully and Stout decided to make a guest appearance at a late game it would have been a different story. Sinclair could be the most talented player ever to grace the UVHL ice surface, other than the 2 former Bruins (Brad Park and Jeff Norton). Even a little out of shape Sinclair kept the Kings in it, and did his best to have fun when it got chippy and a little ridiculous. It seems that we can't please everybody... First there are complaints that there are too many penalties called with USA Hockey, then we drop USA Hockey and go to 1 ref to save everyone as much $ as possible and now there are complaints that there are not enough penalties called... MAKE UP YOUR FUCKING MINDS OR GO PLAY IN THE B LEAGUE!
Response:

Nice write-up, eh!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 8th, 2008 @ 7:01PM


Another good job, Park! SEEEE! Just like mine, they are worth the wait, dammit!
Response:

Yeah, its a beauty!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 8th, 2008 @ 7:06PM


Nice job, Parky!
Response:

Thanks

BY: kpark
Nov 8th, 2008 @ 8:40PM


McDiesel, thanks buddy, those were some great Audio Notes you took for me! Too bad I missed this one. KP
Response:

How 'Bout Dem NORDS!

BY: kpark
Nov 10th, 2008 @ 2:48PM


My first order of business is to make Bartline look like a giant sack of stones by putting a knuckler past his glove. I'm then going to make Charette regret eating the 3rd & 4th gallon of Chubby Hubby ice cream drizzled in bacon fat before the game by turning him inside out. My next goal will be to make Garren Poirier cry, but that shouldn't be too hard.

These aren't really lofty goals, but at least I have goals. KP
Response:

BY: goaliem31
Nov 11th, 2008 @ 8:13AM


KP

i would say is is more along the lines of a talentless Rick DePietro...


LOL!!!
Response:

HUH?

BY: kpark
Nov 11th, 2008 @ 10:03AM


Hold on, DiPietro has talent? You are more like an over the hill Byron Dafoe. But hey, I don't know much about goalies other than TURNING THEM INSIDE OUT! Good luck tonight bud!

KP
Response:

Knocken down Bitches and Whores

BY: MASSHOLE
Nov 11th, 2008 @ 12:07PM


I cannot wait to shut down the Nor-DINKS. Starting with that loudmouth SKANK WHORE, KELLY I AM PUSSY PARK. When my 230lbs chizzled Ben n Jerrys frame drills him into the boards (then he starts bleeding out of his pussy) and then I school McNugget McD (McNuggets fly every where) and shelf it on JT(stands there like a cone) for the game winning goal. It will be a sweet victory for the Brewers. GAME on WHOOORES!
Response:

Title of write up

BY: MASSHOLE
Nov 11th, 2008 @ 12:14PM


Kelly, it must be that time of the month because its the Brewers vs. the Nor-Dinks. Silly bitch.
Response:

Knocken down Bitches and Whores

BY: MASSHOLE
Nov 11th, 2008 @ 12:17PM


I cannot wait to shut down the Nor-DINKS. Starting with that loudmouth SKANK WHORE, KELLY I AM PUSSY PARK. When my 230lbs chizzled Ben n Jerrys frame drills him into the boards (then he starts bleeding out of his pussy) and then I school McNugget McD (McNuggets fly every where) and shelf it on JT(stands there like a cone) for the game winning goal. It will be a sweet victory for the Brewers. GAME on WHOOORES!
Response:

Post meant for Brewers - NorDinks pre game

BY: MASSHOLE
Nov 11th, 2008 @ 12:19PM



Response:

MASSHOLE

BY: kpark
Nov 11th, 2008 @ 12:20PM


Listen up SUCKA FOO, that was after I posted the GAME RECAP of your horrific and embarrassing game against the Whalers last week, if you haven't read it, I'd recommend checking it out. I love the part about Bartline being a Gian Net Condom.

Yes, this week is in fact the Brew Crew vs. the NorSTUDS. I did get a very good chuckle out of Nor-DINKS though!!!

KP
Response:

That's Right

BY: vtdownhiller
Nov 11th, 2008 @ 12:41PM


I think Masshole speaks for his team
Response:

Tough words from.......

BY: kpark
Nov 11th, 2008 @ 1:24PM


Wow, that was harsh, especially coming from the stay puff marshmallow man. How's the recipe for the Hamburger & Fries flavored ice cream coming along?

OH, and 230 lbs? You meant 330 lbs right? You are starting to look like King Kong BUNDY out there on the ice. In conclusion, I am going to first going to shut down Johnson all night, not like that is hard, but anyways it will be done. Then I am going to skate 4 circles around Super Chunk before wheelin' and dealin' on Bartline. I will harass him as I'm coming down on the breakaway to the point where he falls into the fetal position weeping like the 3 year old that he is stuck in that giant body of his, before firing the puck upstairs into the empty net.

I will then treat Charette to a gallon of ice cream..........so that he doesn't eat me.

KP
Response:

I fucking love it!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 11th, 2008 @ 1:42PM


Wings, I mean... I like hockey, too. Especially when the pre-game banter gets Kelly's thong in a knot. If the Brewers keep him off his game (i.e. don't engage him) then he just might get even LOUDER! Funny, funny shit, guys. I liked the McNugget comment, Masshole! You have excellent goals, Park! Set the bar high for the Nordiques to go 5-0 and run the gauntlet to start the season!
Response:

Do you mean....?

BY: hkydoc
Nov 11th, 2008 @ 3:01PM


Park! Do you mean that Casavant actually grew a vagina to go with those bodacious ta-tas of his? Wow. Now they'll never leave the showers...
Response:

Get ready for the whining...

BY: hkydoc
Nov 11th, 2008 @ 3:03PM


WAH! BOO-HOO! WAH! MOMMY!
Response:

FUN FUN FUN

BY: kpark
Nov 11th, 2008 @ 10:16PM


I just want to say that was a fun game tonight. Heartbreaker for both teams, the Brewers had a 4-1 lead in the third and the Nords lost in the shootout. Bartline & Turner were awesome.

It was just a good, fast paced, clean yet physical game.

KP
Response:

life is like a box of chocolates.......

BY: scasnh
Nov 12th, 2008 @ 12:48PM


..........you never know what you are going to get! As Park's mama used to say. One minute you are getting signed up for hockey as 8 year old in the learn to skate program, being dragged kicking and screaming by your mom because now that you are finally done breast feeding she feels that you need to actually toughen up and stop being such a fat little couch bitch. Then the first time you actually stop without falling, you realize that hockey is the best thing on the planet far surpassing masterbation as your favorite hobby. You become totally obsessed with the game and start following high school, college, minors, and the pros while trying to emulate their moves and hits on the ice. You play street hockey 4 hours a day before and after school, coming in way past dark, and are only satisfied when you finally can lift the street hockey ball off the ground. As you get older, the more talented kids start to seperate themsleves out on and off the ice and become obnoxious assholes who feed their own ego by pounding on the stragglers making their existance a living hell. Some of the stragglers take it in stride and try their best to get better at the game they love, once in a while you will see one breaking into a line up with heart and determination in the later years of high school or leading a bantam mid-season team in scoring. Some of them ironically start liking men, and begin looking for a masculine figure to take care of them, or allow themselves to be a sexual door mat for the Syracuse Club team. Some of them just plain go postal and start mailing fertilizer bombs to their mite and peewee coaches or become rink managers so they can hold ice time over the heads of the talented kids. At some point the decision not to play wears down on your psyche and you feel self-doubt and shame, not to mention start you getting fat again. A moment of clarity happens as you get called up to your first varsity practice at your beloved high school and even though you are only on the "target practice" line you feel that all those years of sacrifice and hard work are finally vindicated. Then, before you know it, you are waking up at 5 am, not to go to the rink and play the game you love, but to go to the Co-op to cut meat, or to the office to clean teeth and inappropriately harass your patients, or to the golf course to polish golf balls. It's at this moment that you realize that the two hours on the way to the rink, on the ice, and on the way home from the rink at this point in your life are irreplaceable, and are a huge part of who you are whether you are extremely talented or are just a hard working straggler in a late night beer league. I guess my point is that one should try to enjoy themself when at the rink and appreciate being able to play the best sport on earth because you never know if you will get hurt and not be able to play. Enjoy the the league boys!! ------Smurf out!
Response:

Casavant

BY: kpark
Nov 12th, 2008 @ 4:13PM


On behalf of the entire league, I would just like to say....WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?!?!? Regardless of your incoherent babbling, you are missed. Get well soon kid, you are my favorite target for verbal abuse!

KP
Response:

Kinda sums it up

BY: jt
Nov 12th, 2008 @ 7:31PM


That is the best written forum entry ever. Hey, you reminded me that I was the fat kid who played street hockey goalie. I was the only one who could play with the older kids because I was stupid enough to step in the net with a heavy winter coat, a baseball glove and a Mylec goalie mask. You really get the passion of the game. If more guys loved the game like you do, imagine how great the league could be. Thanks Sean, -- JT
Response:

McD is spineless

BY: kpark
Nov 14th, 2008 @ 12:27PM


Nothing against Danny Ammel, but you are SPINELESS McDermott. I did trash you a bit in the wrtie-ups, but despite it being negative publicity, it is still publicity. You are like the Paris Hilton of the UVHL.

WHALERS, what the hell is wrong with you. Blowing your wad in the 1st period again. Stop your man to man bullshit hockey and play some zone hockey. Clog up the middle and keep your opponents to the outside. Nice game Tuck!

KP OUT
Response:

Great job so far, Park!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 18th, 2008 @ 1:01PM


I'm looking forward to the BELATED conclusion of this excellent write-up!
Response:

Casavant is BRILLIANT!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 18th, 2008 @ 1:07PM


I hereby bestow the UVHL's equivalent of the Pulitzer Prize, the "Kelly Park Loudmouth Award 2008", to Sean Casavant for a touching, hilarious, passionate, and brilliant hockey essay that made me cry, laugh, and throw up all at the same time. WE MISS YOU SEAN! I particularly LOVED the "Syracuse sexual doormat" comment, and had to take my inhaler or I was going to pass out from laughter/oxygen debt! I also appreciated the "inappropriately harass your patients" comment, too...THANKS, EH! I remember the season when I was 10 or 11 and the only goal I got was credited to me in a default win in a tournament and the coach took pity on me and gave me the goal!
Response:

HA HA HA HA HA!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 18th, 2008 @ 1:12PM


I'm not even past the first paragraph and I'm fucking DYING! "BIG GAPING BLOW HOLE" - ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Response:

OUCH. The truth hurts...

BY: hkydoc
Nov 18th, 2008 @ 1:17PM


Nothing like telling it like it is, eh, Park? Lets hope both teams redeem themselves over the course of the remainder of the season.
Response:

NORDS!

BY: kpark
Nov 18th, 2008 @ 1:18PM


Here we go Nords! HERE WE GO!!!!!
Response:

Brewers too good

BY: hkydoc
Nov 18th, 2008 @ 1:20PM


I'm gonna give it to the Brewers tonight. The Gamblers are on their way up, it seems, but the Brew Crew is a VERY good team and has a more complete game. Condon hasn't stolen a game yet, but if he does, and if the Brewers implode in the last 4-5 minutes again, Meyer and Marrazzo can mount a comeback. We'll just have to see, won't we?
Response:

SHIIIIIIIIIIIT

BY: kpark
Nov 18th, 2008 @ 1:24PM


I really thought I had finished the write for this. I'm on it!
Response:

Condon?

BY: kpark
Nov 18th, 2008 @ 2:05PM


Hey Jered? Don't you have any comments? OH that's right, you are TOO busy voting for yourself on multiple computers for the POW.
Response:

The Whales to beat the Nords?

BY: habs101
Nov 18th, 2008 @ 2:26PM


Upset Special?
Response:

Upset Special?

BY: kpark
Nov 18th, 2008 @ 2:27PM


Time to wake up from that dream. UPSET?!?!? There will be no upset this evening. I'm gonna turn La Lallier inside out!
Response:

BY: goaliem31
Nov 18th, 2008 @ 3:03PM


yes kelly that is right... i am sitting in front of 10 computers and voting all day long on each of them... you figured me out!!!
Response:

BY: goaliem31
Nov 18th, 2008 @ 3:06PM


Kelly tells every one he is going to turn goalies inside out but yet i can honestly say i haven't seen him score... he is a phantom point chiseler!!! why do you think when a goalie is scored kelly skates by the ref and talks to him while no one else is around. not to mention if he does take the puck in the offensive zone... he loses it and gives up the odd man rushes and gets his ass off of the ice so that he doesn't take a minus!!! LOL!!!!




is that better kelly?? hahaha
Response:

CONDON!

BY: kpark
Nov 18th, 2008 @ 3:12PM


There's the Condon I was looking for, too bad he's gonna give up 10 tonight. Additionally, I don't fleece the refs for points after the fact, I just add them to the scoresheets after the games. You should know I'm too lazy to chat up the refs.
Response:

I'm changing my prediction

BY: kpark
Nov 18th, 2008 @ 3:15PM


After receiving some top secret information over the UVHL NEWS WIRE, I have been informed....

".........J-ROD Condon may be late to the game due to a shortage of tampons in his residence. The trip to his local Walmart may result in him missing the warmups, if not the first period."

My new prediction is Brewers win 10-3
Response:

BY: goaliem31
Nov 18th, 2008 @ 3:22PM


LOL!! your right you are too lazy
Response:

BY: habs101
Nov 18th, 2008 @ 8:22PM


So was there an upset or am i still dreaming? What's the verdict mr. Park?
Response:

UGH

BY: kpark
Nov 18th, 2008 @ 8:29PM


Yes, upset central at the Union Arena. I am personally embarrassed by my own play and am contemplating retirement.
Response:

Holy shit

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 18th, 2008 @ 9:53PM


Boys, I really do not know what to say. I started reading that...whatever the fuck the fuck that rant was, and actually clued in around the middle of it. I'm not sure if that was a bully-hating verbal retribution blog, or just a trip down memory lane into the troubling up-bringing of a down and out smurf. Maybe it was both, but nevertheless funny.Casavant, where the hell were you tonight? I had no idea you were out of the lineup. Now that I think of it, nope, no smurf flying around like a chicken with his head cut off. The part I do agree with, is that I love nothing more, than the times before, during and after the game. If this is the only sporting glory we all have left, than I wanna play as long as my body will hold up. Hockey is such a huge part of me, I couldn't imagine life without skating. Long live the Greatest Game on Earth, See you fags on the ice, MARSHY!!!
Response:

BY: goaliem31
Nov 19th, 2008 @ 8:14AM


hang'em up or sell your shit to some one in the learn to skate program... then again KP if you go for some learn to skate lessons yourself you might get back to form!!

LOL!!
Response:

BY: goaliem31
Nov 19th, 2008 @ 8:15AM


what Kelly doesn't till now is that i got the tampons from his wife and she told me that they were the same ones Kelly uses every week!! HA
Response:

Lallier OWNS Park in Whaler Shootout victory!!!

BY: KenL
Nov 21st, 2008 @ 10:56AM


Kelly,

I own you!!! Nuff said.
Response:

BY: goaliem31
Nov 21st, 2008 @ 11:48AM


can anyone explain to me why his team even picked him for the shootout??? he has brick hands... LOL!!
Response:

when you're right, you're right

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 21st, 2008 @ 3:17PM


Kenny is DEFINITELY the real deal. And YES he does own your ass! In case you haven't noticed, you definitely have NOT scored on future-UVHL hall of famer, Kenny Lallier in quite a while. Mark the re-match on your calender, and take a nap that day.
Response:

Embarrassment

BY: kpark
Nov 21st, 2008 @ 5:51PM


Lallier, I will give you some TEMPORARY credit. You did shut me down for the game winning stop in the shootout. You are just lucky that:

1. There was that much snow in the crease.
2. There was a WICKED wind was blowing away from you!
3. The ice was tilting AWAY from your net.
4. Karma was definitely NOT on my side.

I probably shouldn't have heckled you as I picked up the puck, but hey, I'm an asshole! That's just what I do. Nice save Lallier, but I am going to light you up Sunday night. I've created a new move just for you.....it's called "Le Lallier Part Deus", it involves 18 head fakes, 3 toe drags & a triple lutz.......or clutz, not really sure which one I'll go with.

KP
Response:

McD for LVP

BY: hkydoc
Nov 24th, 2008 @ 4:30PM


I declare myself the LVP for this game. Two goals basically went in off me with the puck getting caught up in my glove dropping for a rebound and the other going off my thigh pad, and the Hayes goal was my fault, too. I SUCKED! But, other than that, I played well. Did you see my assist? - Chris Johnson
Response:

McWhistle report

BY: hkydoc
Nov 24th, 2008 @ 4:33PM


It was a good game by both teams, well played, good hockey, no bullshit except for a few shitty calls I made. At least it didn't affect the outcome, the Kingers played well, and barely even complained, and when they did they deserved to. Tuck was very cool. Thanks for a good game fellas. We're still working on the reffing situation and appreciate your patience and sportsmanship.
Response:

Park can call Lallier "DADDY"

BY: hkydoc
Nov 25th, 2008 @ 6:45AM


Who's your Daddy, Park? KEN LALLIER IS! HE OWNS YOU IN SHOOTOUTS! Park was pathetic, as usual, in a shootout against the big blue behemoth known as the Whale, but at least he didn't fall over into the side of the net this time and miss the net completely. He at least directed a weak attempt that would have gone in if Lallier hadn't made the save, so I guess that is progress...but regardless LALLIER OWNS YOU! Park was sooooo brutal that the Nords are sending out McD in the next shootout round.
Response:

standings

BY: goaliem31
Nov 25th, 2008 @ 9:04AM


KP it is actually a battle of 3rd place and 5th place... gamblers take third cause of the tie breaking between them and stormkings... just thought i would let ya know...

by the way i am looking forward to seeing how the learn to play hockey class payed off for you this week... haha
Response:

Ha

BY: kpark
Nov 25th, 2008 @ 9:48AM


Condogs, the learn to skate didn't really help. Apparently I need to take more than one class. But they kicked me out saying I was a "Lost Cause" so now I can't take the rest. I did run up and down the stairs a couple of times to get some cans of chilli out of the basement, I think that will definitely help my game.

I hope the WHALE throttles you guys tonight! They do have some weird shots that you wouldn't expect from grown men, and they tend to make plays like Mites who are about to overdose on crystal meth.

KP
Response:

ha

BY: goaliem31
Nov 25th, 2008 @ 10:03AM


i will keep the spastic play in mind...

your not really a lost cause... i would say its more along the lines of "just lost"...

oh and don't let the gimp crew, that is tucks 3 reported injured players, walk you too bad in their walkers... LOL!!!
Response:

HARSH!

BY: kpark
Nov 25th, 2008 @ 10:53AM


McD, that was rough. I thought we were friends. NO LONGER CAN I BE YOUR FRIEND AFTER YOU TRASHED ME LIKE THAT. Oh, wait, I was just channeling Marshy from last year. You're still an asshole!

I'm gonna turn it around tonight with a BIG game.

KP
Response:

Nords better Step it UP!

BY: kpark
Nov 25th, 2008 @ 10:57AM


I'm gonna hip check Mantin through the glass, cause I know McNoBackBone won't suspend me if I tell him I did't do it.

Just kidding Mantin, great to see you're recovering from the knee injury. See you on the ice!

KP
Response:

Fantastic!

BY: PaleWhale
Nov 25th, 2008 @ 11:21AM


Park is a beautiful man as he described the whale as.... "Mites who are about to overdose on crystal meth" . How 'bout high school drop outs on a 12 pack of red bull? This is our game plan, get our heart rates to the point of no return, which means the only way to survive is to keep plugging away while we look for the next shot of adrenaline. Did you see the movie Crank?
Response:

BY: habs101
Nov 25th, 2008 @ 11:36AM


It's funny how those mites that were overdosing beat the almighty Nordinks...Once again nice call kelly. Heard your shootout move made the rest of your team puke.
Response:

TECHNICALLY!!!

BY: kpark
Nov 25th, 2008 @ 11:41AM


If you are going to fudge our name up as the Nordinks, we would prefer you write it this way......Nor-DINKS.....It is more effective and brilliant that way. Yes, my move was something out of a learn-to-skate class, actually, it really is where I learned that move 2 weeks ago. I would just like to say it would have gone in if Lallier hadn't made such an AMAZING stop. It was brilliant and even Lemieux couln't have put that by him.

That being said, I have been doing squat thrusts, leg lifts & toe drags since the loss. All to the sounds of Eye of the Tiger. I won't forget you LALLIER, I WON'T FORGET!!!!
Response:

I am gonna take it haaaaaaad

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 25th, 2008 @ 10:11PM


I'm sure you're gonna rip on me Park, but I really didn't think I was trying to cherry-pick, but I was definitely deep. We really put it to Tuck, but in their defense, they DID have a short bench, and Crapser did NOT meet his spin-o-rama quota, resulting in a sub-par performance by the Tuckies. Fun to win big, but definitely feels better when you win a close one. Great game Nords! Time to get ready for the Gamblers and the Will Meyer Show, Will Condon get lit up for another 8? Time will tell....
Response:

BY: habs101
Nov 26th, 2008 @ 8:37PM


the whale sucks
Response:

BY: goaliem31
Nov 28th, 2008 @ 8:07AM


pre nord/gambelers score prection...

3-2 rambl'n gamblers
Response:

I'm sure you are SOOOO busy

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 28th, 2008 @ 8:43AM


But, would you mind updating the website regularly? If you're having trouble being mobile after a huge feast there muffin-top, maybe a jog and an extra skate will get you motivated. Some of us "Ice Hogs" want to see the stats. I DO have quite a fan base that would like to see the proof of a big game. Even if I WAS warned about scoring anymore, I just can't turn it off. Seriously Park, if you can dig deep and remember what it was like to SCORE a goal, then you would definitely make sure they were updated that night. Also, I hear a rumor that the Storm Queens are considering folding. Is this true? or just at the end of this year? Or at all? I say that I definitely bring a good level of competitiveness to the league, but they really do whine a lot, with the exception of a few guys. Their loss if they leave. We really do have the best men's league in the area.
Response:

Cherry PICKER

BY: kpark
Nov 28th, 2008 @ 12:28PM


There you GO MARSHY. You cherry pickin' SWEDE! Your 5 points are now updated, but I would recommend that you DON'T let your friends read the write-up because you are going to get TRASHED for your lack of sportsmanship and still shooting the puck from EVERYWHERE when we were up 10-2 and you already had just scored the 8th & 9th goals, not to mention that you were cherry picking in the 3rd period when we were up 13 to 3 and under 2 minutes to play.

YOU'RE GONNA BURN LIKE NAPALM IN THE WRITEUPS!!!!!

KP
Response:

3 stars

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 28th, 2008 @ 4:02PM


I think Tao should have been considered for a star. Definitely a P.O.W nomination is in order for his hat trick!
Response:

One friggin time

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 28th, 2008 @ 4:14PM


Dude, say what you will. I agree that I was pretty close to the other team's blueline, but I am in no way a cherry-picker, or a SWEDE! DO NOT compare me to your old boy-toy crush, Martin was his name? Yes, I think it was. I'm sure I'll have the share of the write-up target on my back, but no worries. Everyone has come to know all about your malicious personal attacks, stemming from your OBVIOUS on-ice insecurities. How IS that hockey camp going? I hear Blue might be running a D-level clinic on basic skills, you've already pre-paid. C'mon Park, let's get it together. That bionic, gimp-knee excuse is getting old. Time to step it up this week, I'll count you down for at least a couple on Condon.
Response:

Condon, no f-ing way

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 28th, 2008 @ 4:29PM


If you think you guys are gonna hold us to 2 goals you are dillusional. Did you know Tao had a hat trick last game? I'm sure he's gonna explode out of the gate for at least a couple. My line will no doubt light you up for at least 3. The McGee boys will be good for a couple. So where does that leave you guys? No way are you gonna get more than 4 on John " Fish Out of Water " Turner. Good luck to you, see you on the ice.


Response:

write-up/commentary

BY: goaliem31
Nov 29th, 2008 @ 10:04AM


very in dept coverage KP... your words really tried capturing the spirit of the thing eh?? LOL!!!
Response:

Thanks J-Rod

BY: kpark
Nov 29th, 2008 @ 1:41PM


I really wanted the world to know how magically delicious your leprechaun play was!

KP
Response:

"i wanted to capture the spirit of the thing"

BY: goaliem31
Nov 29th, 2008 @ 1:44PM


LOL!!!
"people are always after me lucky charms"
Response:

BY: goaliem31
Nov 29th, 2008 @ 1:45PM


this write-up is highly antisipated!!! lets see what KP comes up with for this blow out too... haha
Response:

CONDOGS!

BY: kpark
Nov 29th, 2008 @ 1:48PM


HA, Too funny!!!!!!!
Response:

BY: goaliem31
Nov 29th, 2008 @ 1:51PM


um if KP is as ugly as he was against the whale... then i have nothing to worry about...


then again... i never have to worry about KP cause when he has the puck on the point he passes so he doesn't look like Happy Gilmore taking a slap shot and missing the net, and the missing the net part is the only Happy comparison i can make cause we all know KP shoots a slap shot like a 12 year old girl...


let the shit talking start boys!!! cause Tuesday is going to be a cage match!!!
Response:

now Park

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 29th, 2008 @ 7:36PM


That REALLY was funny! Maybe it's the 10-paper joint I just smoked, but I was actually laughing out loud. The part about shooting from the bench, too funny. Lets keep 'em coming this week against a new and improved Gamblers!
Response:

well MARSHY... here is my thinking

BY: goaliem31
Dec 1st, 2008 @ 10:31AM


you guys played TUCK... by far the most inconsistent team in the league. the two games before them you played teams that started to get better and catch up to your team in speed and skill... US (the gamblers) have hit our stride beating teams before last week that are a couple of the better teams in the league, like the Brewers, for instance. teams are catching you guys and hitting their stride... my team is playing some great puck the intire length of the ice, on forward and D. your is is slow and willy, matt, and a couple other speedy guys are going to skate all of you in to the ground... so before you start talking about who score how many in your last game look at who you played last week and look who you lost two shoot out games too...THIS IS WHY I SAY THIS IS GOING TO BE A CLOSE ONE!!! no to mention we blew out a better team then the one you guys blew out last week...
Response:

Condon SUCKS!

BY: kpark
Dec 1st, 2008 @ 8:14PM


You are going DOWN tomorrow night. First I'm going to toe drag your forwards, then toe drag your defenseman. Then I'm going to throw the TRIPLE DEKE at you, take it behind the net and put it in the other side. Then I'm going to piss in your crease. BOOOYAH!!!
Response:

Bruins Tixs for sale

BY: PaleWhale
Dec 2nd, 2008 @ 7:28AM


If you haven't seen the '09 Bruins or been to the garden lately, you should!
I am broke and can't make these thursday games. So, I have a pair at $75 each. Click hear to see my seats and come to the Whalers room if interested or e-mail me at bluefox70@lycos.com

https://www.seats3d.com/nhl/boston_bruins/sec_16_7.html?price_plan_selected=&

March 19th & April 2
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Dec 2nd, 2008 @ 2:14PM


Goalie substitutes could come into play on this one
Response:

YOU ARE RIGHT!!!

BY: kpark
Dec 2nd, 2008 @ 2:19PM


I forgot that Turner will be in net for Tuck. Is Bartline out? Albertozzi in? Hmmm, I may have to change my prediction to Brewers by 2 goals 4-2.
Response:

Come on WHALERS!!!

BY: kpark
Dec 2nd, 2008 @ 2:19PM


Get your shit together and trounce the Kingers!

Response:

good lord PARK!!

BY: goaliem31
Dec 2nd, 2008 @ 2:36PM


you know i never thought i would say this but i think you might actually skate as slow as you type these pre-game reports up here
Response:

BY: habs101
Dec 2nd, 2008 @ 3:27PM


Kpark...another upset special for the whalers?...probably
Response:

Great game, Gamblers.

BY: hkydoc
Dec 2nd, 2008 @ 11:05PM


Nice job handing us our first regulation loss, guys. You beat us to most of the pucks, stifled our offense, and made great passes and got some nice goals...except for the second last one...but the call was the call and that's how it is. Too bad Turner lost his cool, but he manned-up for it, and it will be dealt with. See you on the ice next week.
Response:

Nice pre-game report, Park!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 2nd, 2008 @ 11:06PM


See!!! I TOLD you that you only did 2 out of 3 pre-game reports!
Response:

BY: goaliem31
Dec 3rd, 2008 @ 8:48AM


don't worry Doc... i told that no talent Park he didn't post the pre game yesterday... but he swears on his stone hands and 12 year old girl clapper that he did post it... LOL!!!

on that weak ass shot i felt it best not to rub it in KPs face... but i think the silent treatment was more demoralizing to his huge mellon!!


great game though last night guys!!
Response:

BY: goaliem31
Dec 3rd, 2008 @ 10:16AM


oh and marshy we held you guys to less then the 2 i predicted... lol!!!
Response:

credit where credit is due

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 3rd, 2008 @ 2:37PM


I would like to offer a personal and sincere tip-of-the-hat to the Gamblers. From Offense to defense they were solid. By far the biggest challenge we've had thus far. Condon was definitely solid, not just the top line, but the whole team was clicking all game. Their defense looked great and tough to penetrate. I can't wait for the re-match guys. Great game, and hold your heads high boys. You are definitely a different team than we last played last. See you guys on the ice, MARSHY!!!
Response:

BY: habs101
Dec 3rd, 2008 @ 5:09PM


both the gamblers and the nordiques suck
Response:

Hmmm

BY:
Dec 5th, 2008 @ 10:45AM


Brewers don't stand a chance on Tuesday.
Response:

GOALIE GEAR FOR SALE

BY: goaliem31
Dec 6th, 2008 @ 9:45AM


i have Bauer Reactor 5 pads that are 34" and will fit someone 5'7" to 5'9"
also have a pair of Koho Potvin pads 33"
vaughn full chest and arm pads in a size medium
and a BRIAN's catch glove in the midnight series

Brand New bauer 5000 goalie skates size 8.5

if your interested or know some one who might be... email me at

goalie_man31@yahoo.com

Response:

Fuckin' HILARIOUS!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 7th, 2008 @ 1:59PM


HA HA HA HA! I'm not even through half of the paragraph about my game comments and I'm bustin' a gut! Funny, funny shit, Park!
Response:

ANOTHER fucking hilarious write-up!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 7th, 2008 @ 2:03PM


I LOVED the "nipple twisting" description, and the nicknames in the second period were PRICELESS! Three cheers for Park! Now I'll down another blue cheese shot...
Response:

J-Con's Pads?

BY: kpark
Dec 7th, 2008 @ 9:05PM


Wow, if anyone else in the entire world had worn these pads but you, I woudl definitely put in an offer. Actually, I'll take them if you pay me $500. DONE DEAL!!!
KP
Response:

haha

BY: goaliem31
Dec 8th, 2008 @ 9:10AM


looking for a hockey career change in position, since you can probly only keep up with the morning women skaters at champion... LOL!!!
Response:

BY: goaliem31
Dec 8th, 2008 @ 1:54PM


i wounder if we are going to get to finish reading to see the exciting conclusion to this write up before pre games start going up. oh and as one can see there is still no pregame for this game...

get it in gear KP... and if you get walked tomorrow in our game then i will personally take out your other knee so you have an excuse... haha
Response:

BooHoo

BY: goaliem31
Dec 9th, 2008 @ 11:42AM


um who sounds like a whiny bitch now!!! LOL!!!! put your head out of your own ass... although it might not be very easy cause you have a rather large mellon and score a damn goalie would ya KP!!

see ya at the rink killer!!!
Response:

I really like this Pre-Game Writeup

BY: kpark
Dec 9th, 2008 @ 11:52AM


This very well may be my BEST pre-game writeup to date. Condon, I know that you are the only one who actually reads this crap, so I gave you some good ink!!!
Response:

I hear ya

BY: kpark
Dec 9th, 2008 @ 11:54AM


Hey "Stat Sheet", I will definitely score tonight. I can't promise that I'll actually play any defense in front of you, because frankly I want you to see 95 shots and let in 30 goals so that you will be exhausted for your late game, ultimately being responsible for ending the Gambler's 5 game winning streak.

KP
Response:

BY: goaliem31
Dec 9th, 2008 @ 12:08PM


well that would put you guys into a 2 game skid and look really bad on YOU...

not to mention i am a A1 physically fit specimen of a finly tuned athlete/hockey player!!!

I WISH!!
Response:

BY: goaliem31
Dec 9th, 2008 @ 1:49PM


haha

i feel like the two critiques on the Muppet tv show that sit up in the box and make fun of everything... here is my critique...

short... sweet... to the point... factual... I LOVED IT!!
Response:

Hmmm

BY: MASSHOLE
Dec 9th, 2008 @ 2:56PM


Brewers are going to fuck you ass clowns up.
Response:

They are gone.

BY: PaleWhale
Dec 10th, 2008 @ 7:10AM



Response:

hmm

BY: goaliem31
Dec 10th, 2008 @ 10:40AM


well kelly...

you most definitely didn't score last night... nothing new really.

although i will have to say Frenchy stood on his head last night!!


Response:

Just shut down

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 10th, 2008 @ 8:18PM


I would have to give props to the Queens for a hard-fought game. Frenchy really did shut the door, I guess I'm goin back to my pre-game ritual............
Response:

Excellent game, Kingers.

BY: hkydoc
Dec 11th, 2008 @ 8:16AM


Tuesday night's tilt against the Kingers was a great hockey game. They scored one goal per period, and Frenchy played great. It was good hockey, and nobody bitched or complained. That is what the UVHL is all about, and it was awesome to see a game like that from the Kings, and it was fun to play in win or lose. Nice win, Kings. Congrats, eh. - McD
Response:

Congrats on FIRST PLACE, Gamblers.

BY: hkydoc
Dec 11th, 2008 @ 8:17AM


Way to go, eh. Six in a row is nothing to shake a stick at. Now everyone will be gunning for you!
Response:

Nice comeback, Brew Crew!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 11th, 2008 @ 8:18AM


I guess 8 is enough... Great come from behind effort, Brewers. NICE GOAL, FONZ!
Response:

BY: goaliem31
Dec 11th, 2008 @ 8:20AM


thats fine bring it!!

lol!!
Response:

Hey Park

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 11th, 2008 @ 3:49PM


Kelly, why won't the picture I uploaded work on here? I can't see it. All there is is a little blue box. I don't know how to fix it...see what you can do, I really like the picture. Thx...MARSHY!!!
Response:

yup

BY: kpark
Dec 15th, 2008 @ 4:38AM


I'm on it kid.
Response:

Have no fear!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 16th, 2008 @ 1:28PM


I OWN BAYLEY AND ISAAC!

McDefense
Response:

Hey!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 16th, 2008 @ 1:30PM


Is there any room in that cool new league in Indiana for a fat, old, has-been defenseman? Great name! What is their logo?
Response:

UVHL Skate?

BY: kpark
Dec 17th, 2008 @ 9:16AM


Hey guys, we are off for the next two weeks, but we are trying to rent some ice the next two Tuesday nights. Probably 1.5 hours, but we want 20 guys to commit to being there....WHO'S IN?

KP
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Dec 17th, 2008 @ 10:19AM


next tuesday works for me
Response:

Hey Kelly

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 18th, 2008 @ 6:09PM


YES PLEASE have a skate. I will definitely be in, as long as it's not too late. I'm working super-early all week, so probably no post-game beers for me. But we'll see!!!
Response:

Yup

BY: kpark
Dec 19th, 2008 @ 12:45PM


McBuffalWings definitely did own those two jamokes. Although, I don't really think I'd be bragging about owning two guys that have been roasting in the hot Florida sun for 2 months without even thinking about hockey, ice or the great white North.
Response:

DAMN I'M GOOD!

BY: kpark
Dec 19th, 2008 @ 12:47PM


I predicted a close game, then the Whalers would flail, losing 7-3. I was close. I thought Mantin would have a bit more class, than padding his stats up 7-3 with 5 minutes to play! Just kidding Adam, your entire line got nominations for P.O.W. I think that very well may be a first.

KP
Response:

BY: goaliem31
Dec 22nd, 2008 @ 2:38PM


www.evansvilleicemen.com
Response:

NIce job "SUPERSTAR"

BY: hkydoc
Dec 24th, 2008 @ 3:31PM


Funny, accurate, biting humor, but not quite enough self-depricating enough write-up there, Park...or should I say "supahstaaah"? I laughed out loud at the first paragraph, which was brilliant, and I love the new name "Baylsaac". Oh, yeah...I wasn't bragging about owning those two defensively - I put that in there BEFORE the game, eh, just to bust some balls in case they checked the website prior to thte puck dropping. No need to brag or rub anyone's nose in it, our performance spoke for itself as a great team game. MERRY CHRISTMAS to all UVHLers!
Response:

CONGRATS!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 24th, 2008 @ 3:34PM


First and foremost BIG congratulations to Jered Condon on his minor league contract to keep the dream alive - something we can all admire and respect. If it was me, they'd have to drag me off the ice, so WAY TO GO, JERED!!! YAAAAHHH!!! Also, a heartfelt congrats to the Gamblers on first place for the second week in a row. Methinks that makes 7 wins in a row...and as I recall the UVHL record is 11 or 12... MERRY CHRISTMAS to all UVHLers!
Response:

Nice game, fellas.

BY: hkydoc
Dec 24th, 2008 @ 3:37PM


Great game by Tuck, good effort by the Whalers in this one. Yeah, the reffing was suspect yet again, but hey, we're trying. Thanks to all for being cool about our learning period, eh. MERRY CHRISTMAS to all UVHLers! See you in January! Hey, Park...nice write-up (i.e. none yet)...
Response:

Game commentary

BY: hkydoc
Dec 24th, 2008 @ 3:45PM


Hey, Park...dontcha remember the Nords post-game shower ritual you insisted that we start? Well, that first goal was right in the middle of it and that was why I wasn't in the scorekeeper's box doing game commentary. Is that okay with you? HUH? You ALWAYS hurt my feelings, you insensitive bastard! That is the LAST time I let you...well, you know... ;)'
Response:

Everyone ready?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 2nd, 2009 @ 3:50PM


I hope most of you have had your fill of Turkey, Ham, Prime Rib etc. and are feeling slower than ever! The main thing is we get back to the game we all love. Personally I think that one week would have been fine, as most of the people I talked to, were trying to find a skate or two over the last week anyway. So, for all you guys out there that have written the Nordiques off, as a result of our recent slump, I think our HUGE win over the Brewers before the break will no doubt catapult us back in the UVHL driver seat. McD, get your ass movin out there, Kelly, show us some of that skill you only seem to break out for meaningless pick-up skates, and Turner, try and control yourself for God sakes. I KNOW you eat anger on Tues. nights, but we NEED you. I love you and miss you, yours truly The Butcher of Guelph xx
Response:

I'm RRREEAAAADYYY!!!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 5th, 2009 @ 8:13PM


Fat Bastard is ready to eat the UVHL's entire stock of wings and blue cheese! Mmmmmm....hockey is delicious!
Response:

You call that a write-up, Park?

BY: hkydoc
Jan 5th, 2009 @ 8:28PM


LAZY BASTARD! HALF-ASSED M.F.! How many weeks does it take Kelly fuckin' Park to finish a write-up? Answer: It doesn't matter, he never finishes it anyways!
Response:

It was done!

BY: kpark
Jan 6th, 2009 @ 4:25AM


It was done about 10 minutes after you wrote that asshole! Go eat some more buffalo wings.
Response:

Nope

BY: kpark
Jan 6th, 2009 @ 4:27AM


No way in hell am I ready. I didn't think I could possibly skate any slower or be any more awkward out there, but an extra 10 lbs of chocolate & Turkey have put me over the edge. I've hit an all time low my friends.....all time.
Response:

Good game last night

BY: PaleWhale
Jan 7th, 2009 @ 11:29AM


Just wanted to put my 2cents in. It was a lot of fun and a clean game against the first place Nords last night. Nice comeback from those guys wearing the disgusting piss yellow jerseys, see you in 6 weeks for a rematch! But, on a sad note, only 1 Nord showed up at Bentleys? Pitiful! Simply absurd! Don't say you had to ref or had to go to work on school in the am. Contrary to popular belief, some of the Whales actually go to work on Wednesday morning also. Peace out!
Response:

disappointing

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 7th, 2009 @ 12:37PM


Well, the turn-out post-game at Bend-over-gentley's is really uncharacteristic of the Nords, almost as bad as me leaving the game early with all I can describe as a total and diabolical reaction of my body reacting to whatever the fuck I may have eaten earlier in the day. Pissing out my ass, and projectile vomiting almost sums it up, but I feel better today. I too look forward to the re-match in 6 weeks, good game Whalers!
Response:

I forgot

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 7th, 2009 @ 12:39PM


Kelly, I may have been hallucinating due to fever, but did or did you not score on OUR net last night?
Response:

Who farted?

BY: hkydoc
Jan 7th, 2009 @ 1:38PM


Oh yeah...that was me! But I did it in front of the Whalers net, not in my own corner, and there was an aromatic mixture of bleu cheese mixed in with the Buffalo Sauce. The Whale played great last night, dominated the first half of the game, had Turner seeing blurry spots and coughing up rebounds, got Park so turned around he gave Nalette a beautiful assist, and made Marshy piss out of his ass. Somehow the ugliest jerseys in the UVHL came back to force a shootout. The Whalers deserved to leave with at least a point, that is for sure! It was a fun, clean game (except for you Oliver, you little sneaky, dirty shit!) and we'll see you guys in a few weeks! Oh, and by the way, JT and McD DID show up at the bar at the very end of the night, albeit briefly, so make that 3 Nords for post-game attendance.
Response:

Good, tough game by both squads.

BY: hkydoc
Jan 7th, 2009 @ 1:42PM


Tuck just keeps getting better and better and proved it by scoring a shitload of goals on JT who was filling in for Frenchy last-minute. The Kings played hard and with skill as usual, and this was a VERY even match with lots of physical play that we tried our best to balance out and call evenly. Good, tough, physical (sometimes TOO physical...more on that later), and skilled hockey by both teams!
Response:

Wow. Scorefest between Brewers & Gamblers!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 7th, 2009 @ 3:35PM


I didn't know either team had it in them. Both squads moved the puck well, created great offensive chances, capitalized on A LOT of them, and played hard. It was a good hockey game, and was fun to ref (believe it or not). JT was in a dehydrated tizzy seeing blurry pucks by the end of it, and finished the night with 3 wins and a 7.00 GAA, not exactly like he scripted it, but 3 wins nonetheless! Bartline made the SAVE OF THE NIGHT grabbing one with his glove in the second period that should have been a goal and sent the Gamblers top line back to the bench shaking their heads. Great game fellas!
Response:

HA!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 9th, 2009 @ 9:53PM


Nice one, Park! Well, at least I didn't get charged by the goalie for calling it a goal! Ha ha ha ha! Pattison was a class act in admitting it hit crossbar and not inside the goal. Alas...the rookie reffing season continues...
Response:

C'mon, Park! It is Friday night!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 9th, 2009 @ 9:57PM


What am I going to amuse myself with now that the write-ups are LATE AGAIN YOU LAZY BASTARD! Any fucking time I was past Thursday doing them you incessantly busted my tiny balls! What excuse do you have this week, huh? You double-standard-piece-of-shit-mother-fucker!!! Yours Truly, The Procrastinating Guy Who Didn't Do The Game Sheets Ahead of Time This Week
Response:

Oh, I can't wait for this one...

BY: hkydoc
Jan 9th, 2009 @ 10:00PM


Hey, don't forget to critique your own rookie reffing debacle in your second time ever wearing the stripes.! Take a frickin' lesson in puck dropping for instance. Oh, and while you're at it, strike another pose sitting on the boards flirting with the players a la Tony Gove, Pretty Boy!
Response:

Guaranteed WIN!

BY: kpark
Jan 12th, 2009 @ 7:54PM


I'm going to say this will be a guaranteed win for the Nordiques if Drew "The Craponator" Crapser plays for Tuck tonight. I'm also going to guarantee that I turn the puck over at LEAST 8 times & McDermott will clear out the entire defensive end with one of his SIGNATURE buffalo wing farts.

KP
Response:

BY: habs101
Jan 14th, 2009 @ 1:21PM


who won this game? my guess is the whale tale
Response:

Bartline #1

BY: hkydoc
Jan 19th, 2009 @ 4:24PM


Bartline was THE BEST player in the UVHL on Tuesday night. Nice to see your A-plus game, Petey!
Response:

Where's the rest, Park?

BY: hkydoc
Jan 19th, 2009 @ 7:50PM


C'mon Park! Finish the write-up already dammit!
Response:

get your shit together Park!!

BY: goaliem31
Jan 20th, 2009 @ 9:21AM


it seems to be an odd patern when the Gamblers play the Nords... the pre game write ups either never get posted or they are one sentance long... come on park...
Response:

I need to know

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 21st, 2009 @ 7:50AM


Will the Kingers ACTUALLY have a team to show up? Without all the usual whining and bitching. If so, I can get a lot of that right here at home.
Response:

No Heart from the Kingers.

BY: kpark
Jan 21st, 2009 @ 12:03PM


Wow, I can't believe the Kinger's didn't show up to play last night because their entire team was "sick". What are your thoughts?

- Some kind of crazy locker room orgy that spread a virus?
- Being sick was an excuse because they don't want to play the late games?

Personally, I've never missed a hockey game because I was sick.

KP
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Jan 21st, 2009 @ 5:07PM


Haven't they won a game with only 5 players? I am shocked..they used to be the most proud and confident team in the league...I still look forward to seeing who shows up and playing them, always an interesting evening
Response:

who knows

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 21st, 2009 @ 5:59PM


I for one agree with Al, they are usually a challenge, no matter WHO shows up. It's always funny to see Frenchy blow his stack, Artie to totally self-implode, Leroy to use more Kleenex whining than a snot-nosed Kelly Park jr. on a sick day, the ageless one Marty White schooling guys half his age. I hope that the Kingers get their team on the same page, because the actually do make the league better. However, there are some of them that think the league has got too serious. Some players ARE serious about hockey, including myself. I agree that it IS a men's league, but who the fuck are they to tell us how serious to take it? If you don't wanna play, then just don;t play at all. Go back to pounding PBR's at the local watering hole, telling everyone how good you USED to be!
Response:

Park, wow!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 23rd, 2009 @ 4:01PM


Honestly dude, that MAY have been the funniest write-up I have ever read. The part about the Honolulu Ice Turkeys, LMFAO, 6th string? wow, pure comedic genius! And Tao Tongue-kissing the glass was hilarious. I can actually visualize your head getting bigger and bigger, so I'll shut up now. Anyhoo, nice job KP. Can't wait for the Kingers next Tues.!
Response:

I'm absolutely disgusted.

BY: hkydoc
Jan 23rd, 2009 @ 9:57PM


What an embarassment to the UVHL and to the game itself when a team that is so fucking full of itself, with the exception of a few players, doesn't bother to show up for a game. Thanks for wasting our time, the Whalers time, and the ice time. Go play pick up hockey somewhere else amongst yourselves because you've obviously got better things to do than waste our efforts on you. For those of you that still enjoy competitive hockey, the UVHL will be here and we'll keep doing our best to have a good league and hockey experience for you. The rest of you can go away, you won't be missed. - McD
Response:

Bring a light and a dark, eh.

BY: hkydoc
Jan 23rd, 2009 @ 10:00PM


Just in case the Storm Kings don't show, bring two jerseys so we can play some pick-up hockey.
Response:

Finish the write-up already!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 25th, 2009 @ 10:28PM


C'mon, Park! Fans wanna know! Stop leaving us hanging, eh! You've only got two to do this week anyway, so get off your ass!
Response:

COME ON WHALE!

BY: kpark
Jan 27th, 2009 @ 1:06PM


I'll be rootin tootin for the Whalers in this one, but I just don't think they have the BALLS to play 3 full periods. NO BALLS, do Whale's actually have balls? Not sure, but Sperm Whale's are full of juice. Well, how about some sperm whale juice in the 3rd period, I heard Casavant is gonna make it back tonight with a huge load of sperm whale juice just for the Whalers.
Response:

ROOT ROOT ROOT FOR TUCK

BY: kpark
Jan 27th, 2009 @ 1:08PM


I love to see the big man fall, and I even love to see Willy Meyer get all crotchety when he's losing. There really is nothing better than an angry dwarf, well maybe a drunken angry dwarf high on speed......yeah, that's pretty cool.

GO TUCKEROOOSKies
Response:

Big one for the Nords

BY: kpark
Jan 27th, 2009 @ 1:09PM


Yeah, I hope that the Storm Kings actually show up, and have a full squad too. I promise the Nords won't take it too seriously, maybe we can just toss our sticks in the middle......

YEAH RIGHT!!!!!

Too serious? That's gay.
Response:

BY: habs101
Jan 28th, 2009 @ 12:40PM


hey parl you do realize the whalers actually won 5-2 right. I know it's hard to believe but it is true.
Response:

I was wrong

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 29th, 2009 @ 9:09AM


I definitely have to give the Kingers credit. They DID beat us, and they definitely DID show up ready to play. Hopefully the next time I talk shit, I'll actually back it up. Great hard-fought game guys, we were definitely in it all the way. Too bad for the un-timely goal by the Kingers to put them up 4-3, and then an empty -netter to seal it. Can't wait for the re-match.
Response:

Good game Kingers!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 29th, 2009 @ 4:46PM


Thanks for the playoff-like hockey game Tuesday night Kings. Nice to see you haven't totally lost it, and you guys showed up, played hard, and beat us fair and square. Nice veteran move by Pattison to move JT just enough to open up a hole for Cashman to put in the go ahead goal without getting called for goaltender interference. I guess that is why he played in the AHL and we play in the UVHL... I, too, am looking forward to the rematch.
Response:

asleep at the wheel?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 2nd, 2009 @ 6:52AM


Park, when are you gonna update the website dude? I mean, where's the write-ups?
Response:

I suck

BY: kpark
Feb 2nd, 2009 @ 2:01PM


I know.....I suck. No excuses, just that I suck at life right now.

KP
Response:

Hey TAO

BY: kpark
Feb 2nd, 2009 @ 2:09PM


I would just like to trash talk a little bit and say that the Brewers suck. They are the worst team ever and will lose 1000-1, the only goal that will be let up will be a fluke after I throw the puck in my own net just to show them that it is IN FACT POSSIBLE TO SCORE ON JOHN TURNER.

I WILL THEN DO LAPS AROUND THE RINK IN MY UNDIES to "Livin' La Vida Loca". Peter Bartline looks like an over stuffed and undercooked Turkey.

Hey Tao, that trash talking wasn't too bad was it?!?!?!!?
Response:

Gunna be a good one

BY: kpark
Feb 3rd, 2009 @ 12:54PM


This should be a good, fun & clean game with a good tempo. See you guys tonight.

KP
Response:

Lallier is my GOD!

BY: kpark
Feb 11th, 2009 @ 5:12AM


I have built a shrine to the one and only Kenny Lallier, it contains a bronze sculpture of him two pad stacking, candles & an altar.
Response:

Nordiques

BY: Oliver
Feb 11th, 2009 @ 10:00PM


I've gotta say, The Nordiques have a decent team with an exception of that park guy. Enjoyed the game.

Pce.
Response:

Excellent game on Tues!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 12th, 2009 @ 11:29AM


LeLallier and Turner each faced about 40 shots, both teams played hard and relatively clean, and it was a one goal game decided by "an NHL move", as JT put it, on a breakaway by Joey "Mr. Underrated" Hayes, the heart and soul of the Whalers. There was even a Kevin Louzier sighting! Congrats on the upset, fellas. Until next time....
Response:

UNACCEPTABLE CONDUCT BY THE QUEENS!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 12th, 2009 @ 11:31AM


Canceling AGAIN, especially after we tried to help your opponents by moving all of your 9:40 game times to an earlier slot, was FUCKING RIDICULOUS! Three strikes and you're OUT! - McD
Response:

Great competition in this one

BY: hkydoc
Feb 12th, 2009 @ 11:34AM


This was a battle, no question. Meyer was the difference after his team went down 3-1 to the Brewers, but Bayley brought back it to a 1 goal difference late in the third to give his team a shot until the empty netter sealed the deal for the Gamblers. Nice game to all involved, and even the whining wasn't all that bad (nothing we can't handle anyway).
Response:

Park called it...

BY: hkydoc
Feb 12th, 2009 @ 11:35AM


Hey, Parky! I just realized that you called this a 6-4 game for the Gamblers ahead of time, and it was! Nice job. eh, you hockey guru.
Response:

BY: habs101
Feb 12th, 2009 @ 2:59PM


the score was 4-2......yes i realize one was an empty net
Response:

Nice group of guys..those queens

BY: PaleWhale
Feb 13th, 2009 @ 8:00AM


You guys signed up for that douchie team, its not anybody else fault. Its time to man up or get out. Your not the only ones who hate to drive to friggin' snooty woodstock late at night and get up and work early in the morning.
Response:

It's true

BY: kpark
Feb 17th, 2009 @ 1:27PM


Yup, you heard it here first, Condon is a Tranny!!!!
Response:

Here's to HOPING!

BY: kpark
Feb 17th, 2009 @ 1:27PM


Let's just hope the Kingers show up. We are all preying and hoping for the best. I then hope CJ has 18 goals on Frenchy!!!!!
Response:

Where are the Nords?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 18th, 2009 @ 5:58PM


I for one will take responsibility for totally sucking ass the last like 8 games. But we as a team have totally blown chunks since the Christmas/New Year's break. The Nords will definitely need to support JT in the net more offensively for us to win a game. The competition in the " U " is such now that there are no easy goals anymore, other than the garbage goals. I want to personally thank Kelly Park for bringing in a goalie that clearly hadn't played at this level before. Definitely NOT a great time to bring in just any goalie when we're trying to snap a losing streak. Nothing against BOB, I think that was his name, but J-Roc Condon was ready to go before the game, and would have given it his all. Even if the Co-Commish questions his manliness. For the record, I do NOT think you're a tranny Condon, I skated my ass off for most of the game last night, only to have us scored on almost every other time I came off the ice. A little frustrating. So, next time you have an idea like that, talk to your teammates. Or strap 'em on yourself. Now THAT would be funny. Actually if I put on the pads, THAT would be funny!
Response:

Ouch

BY: kpark
Feb 19th, 2009 @ 9:58AM


Harsh Marshy. HARSH. It was a tough call as commish, but one that I felt needed to be done. We are constantly looking for goalies, and with Pete "The Meat" Bartline leaving for Alaska next month to participate in a ground breaking scientific experiment where he will try to impregnate 8 male moose in 3 months, we need to find some new pipe protectors.

The bottom line is we need to score more goals. Starting with YOU, Coatsey, Jordan & Roger. WOW, I just checked your stats.....10 games IN A ROW without a goal. Since you ruined your karma by scoring 4 late goals in a 14-3 thrumping of Tuck. You better start preying now, because Karma is a bitch and these things can last for years.

KP
Response:

I agree

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 20th, 2009 @ 2:18PM


Park, I couldn't agree more. I totally deserve every piece of criticism I get. I don't think I've gone ten games without a goal in my entire life! This slump is SO frustrating, I mean...I'm hitting posts, getting robbed, etc.. no more excuses! I will score on J-Roc, Once starting goaltender for the Honolulu Ice Turkeys (LMFAO), at least 6 times. Well, maybe not six, but I NEED a goal or two, for my own piece of mind, what's left of it! But overall as a team, we're just not putting the puck in the net like we once were. Not sure why, but we NEED intensity from everyone. I'm gonna go out on a limb here, and GUARANTEE, yes GUARANTEE an all-in, all the marbles, bettin the farm, victory over the first-place Gamblers on Tues night, or else I guess I'll have to pack it up, move into my mom's basement, and eat hotpockets with Casavant all day long. Look out Gamblers, There's a Train comin through!
Response:

BY: habs101
Feb 20th, 2009 @ 3:20PM


all i know is that may have been the most pethetic game i have ever been apart of.
Response:

skates/chest pads

BY: rgrunds
Feb 23rd, 2009 @ 2:01PM


Do you still have the skates? I need a replacement for mine.

I think I ran into you in the Nords dressing room. I subbed for their goalie and they had you as a backup in the event I didn't show.

You seemed very solid in your game. I hung around to watch the last one. You positioned yourself very well.
Response:

Stakes?

BY: vtdownhiller
Feb 23rd, 2009 @ 2:26PM


I'll take that bet!
Response:

skates

BY: goaliem31
Feb 23rd, 2009 @ 4:02PM


hey
yes i still have the skates... they are brand new and when i bought them i payed $400 for them and am looking to get $200...
Response:

ohhhhhhhhhh

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 24th, 2009 @ 7:56AM


Cooooooonndoooonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn, ohhhhhhhhhh Connnnnnndonnnnnnnnnnn.
I'll leave it to Kelly to get inside yer head, I'll be the on e getting the pucks inside the net!
Response:

ohhhhhhhhh

BY: goaliem31
Feb 24th, 2009 @ 8:15AM


its not my head that will be gotten into... i let kelly do his shit talking and let him think he is in my head... letting him think this takes him right off his game cause he is then only worrying about me...LOL!!!!

as for you... that coin is still up in the air on which MARSHY will step out on the ice... will it be the big bomber?? or will it be the big whiffer???

LOL!!!!!!
Response:

Condon Sucks

BY: kpark
Feb 24th, 2009 @ 9:09AM


I'm going to beat Condon like a 2-dime Tranny In Rut-Vegas. You are going to be a rented mule tonight. Marshy's first shot is actually going to be off the ice and a 105 MPH bomb off your forehead. After that we'll pop in about 7 or 8 and call it a day.

Ok, we are going to focus on defense and win this one 2-1.

Ok, I have no idea what we are going to do, but we will probably lose 9-1 since we can't score and Condon is by far the best goalie in the Northeastern Hemisphere. I am only going to prey that his car won't start tonight and we don't have to face the all-powerful J-Red "The Condor" Condon.

KP
Response:

2-dime tranny?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 24th, 2009 @ 11:41AM


wow, hurtful...bout nonetheless, I WILL be firing a 100÷ mph rocket directly at you J-Roc, then after that, every single rocket will fly by you at break-neck speed. The Gamblers only hope is that the top-dog line will counter-attack as quickly. Hopefully Park, you'll keep the offense coming, we need you as our quarterback, directing the play. You are a very knowledgeable hockey player, and really do help us a lot out there. Try NOT talking shit, and put the puck in the net....that will definitely hurt a LOT more. Besides, for every goal you score I'll buy you a Long Trail....good deal eh?
Response:

DONE DEAL

BY: kpark
Feb 24th, 2009 @ 2:32PM


Ok, so one beer for every goal I score, but I want 2 for every time I make Condon cry tonight.


LOVE THE PUCK
BRING THE HATE
Response:

WISHFUL THINKING!!!

BY: goaliem31
Feb 26th, 2009 @ 8:36PM


hey Park!!!
your a little weezle... not sure what game you watch on tuesday... but we (the Gamblers) won the game vs. you (the nords). so you need to fix the standings you meat head!!!
Response:

agreed

BY: pb
Feb 26th, 2009 @ 11:20PM


you also hosed us in the standings parky.... we are now 11-7, not 10-8

i know you cant stand the idea of your precious Nords falling from grace, but we clearly are dominating you in the standings.

I am so glad i dont have to put up with you at Union Arena any longer.

Go Brewers

Regards,

PB
Response:

ahhh, the webmaster taking heat!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 27th, 2009 @ 1:56PM


Kelly, way to go. You've pissed off P.B. Now he has no choice but to disappear into the Alaskan wilderness with nothing but an 8"x10" of he and Bayley in a naked high-five.(nice tatoo p.b) I really enjoyed the old days when I actually scored on P.B, ahhh the memories! And then there's J-Rod. PLEASE don't make another mistake in the standings, or I think he might actually self-implode. I'm guessing after that short stint with the Honolulu Ice Turkeys of the M.W.D.F.C.W.Y.H.L (Division 2) Tier 6, was less than impressive, he'll be around for awhile. We'll have to look for an upset in the playoffs, so let's let actions speak for themselves and beat them fair and square next time out. See ya round boys!
Response:

11-7

BY: pb
Mar 2nd, 2009 @ 12:15AM


the Brew Crew is 11-7 Parky, not 10-8

just 'cause I am chasing Moose up here in the Arctic, doesn't mean I wont check in periodically to see how far the Nords have dropped in the rankings and what kind of trash you talk on the forum.

keep it clean you goon.
Response:

BY: habs101
Mar 3rd, 2009 @ 11:52AM


I dont know if park knows this but the Whalers actually have a winning record Brewcrew.
Response:

Well Aware!!!

BY: kpark
Mar 3rd, 2009 @ 3:19PM


I'm well aware of the history this season.......and all I have to say is....Even the Sun Shines On A Dogs Ass Every Once In Awhile. If you don't get the proverb saying that ya got lucky. Here's another one....even a broken clock is right twice a day......unless it's digital and doesn't have power......or unless the arms are torn off of it........

Anyways, good luck tonight. My thoughts & prayers are with the Whalers as they are not the shittiest team in the UVHL anymore, since my Nordiques have taken over that spot pretty handily!!!!!

KP
Response:

Barty?!??!

BY: kpark
Mar 5th, 2009 @ 11:20AM


This can't be Petey! No way. He is afraid of the UVHL forum. Unless he is finally ready to face me from 3,000 miles away!!!!!

Good to see you are still checking in. How's the weather in Alaska? Yes, I did stiff you guys of a win, but it was by accident. You are all set now. Your team could have used you last week in a horrific 504 loss to the Whalers!!!

The new kid just ain't you.

KP
Response:

Just Update The site

BY: vtdownhiller
Mar 5th, 2009 @ 12:30PM


Instead of wasting valuable time bantering on the forum, you could actually update the site so Petey doesn't have to endure your dribble.....
Response:

No glory for the Whale

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 6th, 2009 @ 6:07PM


Mr Webmaster, co-commish, and smack-talk extraordinaire..K>P where is the P.O.W nod for ANY Whaler at all? Not only did they beat a pretty good Brewers team, but they scored 6 goals. Even though Chris"the flying chicken with his head cut off" Johnson scored a couple, and had a couple helpers, I would have liked to see someone stand out from the Whale. Re-think your life Park, you are a disgrace to your hockey brethren.
Response:

Lallier

BY: Oliver
Mar 7th, 2009 @ 11:55PM


I think Lallier was pretty epic in net. Personally, I think the officiating crew should get one for their fair and unbiased calls...

Response:

Tough Call....

BY: kpark
Mar 8th, 2009 @ 7:43PM


Marshy, I would have nominated the entire Whalers crew if I could have. It was more of a team effort than any individuals on the ice. They put together a solid game, from net all the way out to their forwards. The write-up will reflect that when......yes.....WHEN I ever get off my fat lazy ass to do it.

Yes, Lallier was excellent in net, but allowing 5 ga, will NOT get you a POW nod, unless you turn away 60 shots.

KP
Response:

Should be a GOOD ONE!

BY: kpark
Mar 10th, 2009 @ 6:02AM


Too bad "Super Cookie Dough" Charette won't be in this one due to fighting last week. Dan, way to pick a fight with someone 1/16th your size in Joey Hayes. It was like a Walrus picking a fight with a penguin.

Hopefully the Nords can put together a winning streak here.

KP
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Mar 10th, 2009 @ 2:02PM


don't be shocked if Nick surprises you with a blistering performance...remember "Rust Never Sleeps"
Response:

We'll see!

BY: kpark
Mar 10th, 2009 @ 2:12PM


Regardless, this should be a good game. Turner looked like a giant ball of shit last week too. So I'm not expecting much out of him in net either.

KP
Response:

Referee Playoffs

BY: Oliver
Mar 12th, 2009 @ 2:15PM


So I was thinking...

For the Playoffs, why don't we invest in some "outside, impartial" referees to officiate our games?

Response:

Emetic Semitic Strikes back

BY: rgrunds
Mar 12th, 2009 @ 2:49PM



> "Who was that masked man? Peculiar happenstance and a dark stranger in
> goal. Well everybody, don't worry, the "emetic semitic" is not going
> to
> open up a stand to lend money at the local Episcopal church. As a
> matter
> of fact, I have scouted this guy and was at the Tuck game. Yeah,
> sent by
> Guam in the Grass Skirt league and I was authorized to sign him for a
> roast boar and some shiny mirrors.
> Guys, I mean, give a fucker a break. 35 saves and he stopped 5
> breakaways. Sure, 2 between the legs, but he had position on a skater
> who got behind the defense...(again)...and got most of the second one.
> Admit it, haven't you EVER had something ugly between YOUR legs? Hmmm?
> Did any one notice the tipped shots, screens and open men in the high
> and low slot?
> Little case of nerves sure.....coulda been 2-3 goals better...Guy
> hasn't been able to play at this level more than a couple times a
> year.
>
> Uh...What was the score of the following Whalers game?
>
> And, Mr. Marsh, your prodigious shot aside, just because you wear
> underwear doesn't exempt you from toilet paper."
>
> Luc Wannahula
>


Response:

I totally get ya

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 14th, 2009 @ 7:27PM


I have nothing against Bob, or anyone for that matter that may want to take a crack at a tougher level to see if they still got it. All that I was trying to say, was that is PROBABLY wasn't the best time to bring in an unknown goalie, when we were on like a 4 or 5 game losing streak. Especially when we had an opportunity to grab The Gamblers' goalie, Jared to play. Ultimately this IS just a men's league, not the pros. But believe it or not, some people take it a BIT more serious than that. So, seriously dude No offense to you or Bob, just bad timing in my opinion.
Response:

Down boi

BY: rgrunds
Mar 14th, 2009 @ 8:57PM


Mr. Marsh...Marshy...

not to worry. I like the exchange.

Would you please ask K. Park to turn off his vibrating egg and update the site with the most recent games? I think his prosthetic toys are distracting him.

BG ES
Response:

Mr. Park Game Updates Please

BY: rgrunds
Mar 15th, 2009 @ 7:27AM


Um,

Mr. Park. Please update the site with the March 10 games. I know you must be busy, but perhaps you are being distracted by your vibrating egg. I don't know....just a guess.

E.S.
Response:

McCheeseburger

BY: kpark
Mar 15th, 2009 @ 4:07PM


I am no longer in charge of the game updates. Shawn "The Hot Cheese" McCheeseburger is now the voice of the UVHL.

You will have to wait until May 2011 to get this weeks writeups.
Response:

Really?

BY: kpark
Mar 15th, 2009 @ 4:08PM


How about you stop your bitching, shut your mouth and clean up your game! There's a start.
Response:

You really have some balls

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 15th, 2009 @ 4:13PM


Seriously Oliver. you have a pretty big bullseye on you already. Are you really interested in going down that road? I for one, probably have a hundred pounds on you, so I have no problem telling you how it is. They guys that VOLUNTEER to ref are doing everyone a favor. If you and everyone else would like to pay more, than that would be the case. But for me and my family, I cannot afford to pay any more than it already costs. Yes, maybe a USA Hockey ref would be in some people's eyes as impartial, I think the guys that do ref do a pretty good job. Honestly, I don't think they sway the game in anyone's favor. So, on that note, I think we should keep the way it is.
Response:

I agree

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 15th, 2009 @ 4:17PM


McD, get the fucking phone out of your hands, stop texting Alanna, and MAKE yourself do the write-ups. Man, you're worse than a 9th grade cheerleader with that thing, Don't even tell me it's not right beside you, RIGHT NOW!!!

Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Mar 16th, 2009 @ 4:43AM


atleast update the standings and stats
Response:

I stand Corrected

BY: rgrunds
Mar 16th, 2009 @ 8:28AM


Mr. Park. Please excuse my presumptive behavior.

Now....back to your vibrating egg. I didn't mean to interfere with private activites.

E.S.
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Mar 17th, 2009 @ 5:22AM


Well said Marshy, well said
Response:

McD is on it!

BY: hkydoc
Mar 17th, 2009 @ 1:16PM


Tuesday is my hockey day fellas, so I'm working on it as we speak! See you on Thursday night at Campion, eh!
Response:

HA, The SHITHAWKS

BY: kpark
Mar 18th, 2009 @ 10:21AM


Too funny Shawn, the SHITHAWKS. That is exactly what they looked like with those awful jerseys. This one looked like it was going to end up in a bench clearing brawl halfway through.

It's funny though, sitting in the scorebox and watching the Storm Kings whack & hack all night long and then get upset when the Gamblers FINALLY had had enough of it and returned the favor. There are certain players that are very clean on the Kinger's but if you aren't going to police your own team, don't bitch about your opponent getting fired up and matching the type of play.

GREAT GAME to be a spectator at.
Response:

UVHL sucks, Chris Johson wins POW.

BY: kpark
Mar 18th, 2009 @ 10:47AM


What are your thoughts about Chris Johnson winning the Player Of The Week last week? Has our league gotten THAT BAD?!?!?

Just Kidding CJ. You played your best game of the year in a tough 6-5 loss to the Whale Tale. CJ took 77 of 197 votes for 40% of the total votes.

Congrats & go pick up your FREE case of beer from the AMAZING Long Trail Brewery.
Response:

I'm way ahead of you, Oliver.

BY: hkydoc
Mar 19th, 2009 @ 12:29PM


I've already scheduled Greg Hadley and Brian Martin, the only two non-player refs, to do the entire playoffs for us. I agree that there would be a conflict of interest if we had player-refs, and unless there is an emergency I'd only ask Gary Laperle to fill in otherwise. I also agree with Park, too, you pesky, annoying, little shit.
Response:

Bring your A-game, Nords.

BY: hkydoc
Mar 19th, 2009 @ 1:03PM


LeLallier is on FIRE right now, and both benches are expected to be short. Whoever works the hardest and makes the least mistakes will win. See you on the ice!
Response:

No, and yes.

BY: hkydoc
Mar 19th, 2009 @ 4:07PM


No, we don't suck that bad because, yes, CJ has been playing his best hockey in years the past month or so. It must be the extra skating and the deep insight he gets from reffing the UVHL! Congrats, CJ! Now we'll never hear the end of it...and yes I saw your goal!
Response:

Mr. Park Mr. Condon

BY: rgrunds
Mar 21st, 2009 @ 10:38AM


Wow. I was impressed with the skill of Mr. Condon. Really knows position....BUT, it is distressing to read the transvestite remarks. This is important.

Did you know it is a scientific fact that transvestites and homosexuals will undress and kill you?

It's true. This is not just homo-transo-phobia.

ES
Response:

Hell of a Game

BY: kpark
Mar 21st, 2009 @ 11:18AM


That was a blast guys! Great tempo, clean & excellent goaltending!

KP
Response:

WTF Bob?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 21st, 2009 @ 5:52PM


I think your attempt to bring light of the abilities of trans-gendered and homosexual people is down-right scary. We all know J-Roc is neither a tranny or a fag. Quite frankly, that kind of B.S talk has no place on this website, and you should feel shame sir! I for one speak my mind whenever I need to, and I hope we never have to deal with this issue in the dressing room. It's definitely fun to rip on Condon though, he sure rips on me whenever he feels like it! No harm, no foul...'Nome sayin? Besides, what are you, some kind of "expert" in the field?
Response:

Mr. Marsh/You are So Right

BY: rgrunds
Mar 21st, 2009 @ 6:14PM


I was acting from a sense of public service.

The message was ONLY for the prevention of disease and to enhance wardrobe.

Yeah.

I can' t help it. Sometimes I think funny thoughts.

ES
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Mar 22nd, 2009 @ 6:35AM


maybe next time you can share some of your " funny " thoughts
Response:

UVHL! You've got a home....

BY: rgrunds
Mar 22nd, 2009 @ 4:31PM


The place to go when you get sick and tired of people being nice to you.

Rock on fuckers.

yeah.


Response:

write up

BY: habman
Mar 23rd, 2009 @ 10:29AM


I missed the last 4 minutes, OT and Shoot Out... details!?
Response:

I apologize for MARSHY!!!!

BY: kpark
Mar 23rd, 2009 @ 1:25PM


I would just like to plea to the HOCKEY GODS to lift the curse that Tuck & Myself put on Greg "The Butcher of Guelph" Marsh. His last goals came on November 25th, 2008 when he selfishly scored 4 of 14 goals in a 14-3 blowout of Tuck. Most of those goals came late in the game when it was already out of hand. I cursed Marshy out and hoped that he wouldn't score another goal for the rest of the year.

I also think Adam "The Preying" Mantin made a voodoo doll out of a Team Canada Jersey, a snippet of Marshy's chest hair & a bottle of LaBatte Blue. He then cut off the arms of the doll with a dull butter knife. Mantin, PLEASE re-attach the arms.....PLEASE. Marshy is in a downward spiral and is possibly suicidal.

To the hockey Gods, I am willing to give up my BLAZING speed in order to have Marshy score again. I know my game will be severely diminished without my ice melting speed, but there is only one game left, PLEASE, for the sake of the Big Canadian, have mercy!!!!
Response:

you will need to.......

BY: goaliem31
Mar 23rd, 2009 @ 10:25PM


the hockey gods called me tonight and told me that marshy needs to sacrafies 2, 12 packs of blue to the Gamblers for tuesdays game. then bite the head off of a bat and drink its blood with a malson ice as a chacer!!!

and if that doesn't work... then the big canuck should have stayed or come back for the small sided practice we had last week... he forsure would have scored at least 2 goals... lol

see all you guys tomorrow...
Response:

Condon is right....ish

BY: kpark
Mar 24th, 2009 @ 7:11AM


Marshy, you SHOULD take J-Rock's advice, but hand those 2 - 12 packs to Tuck before our game. Two things may come from this:

1. Mantin may remove the curse he has put on you.
2. They may get SO drunk pre-game that you can actually score a goal.

It is a slim, slim, slim sliver of hope, but well worth it.
Response:

Ouch!

BY: hkydoc
Mar 24th, 2009 @ 7:40AM


Jered, are you trying to say that Marshy would have scored only as many goals on you as I did in our 3-on-3 late night battle? OUCH! That hurts! especially because I am a fat, slow, stone-handed defenseman who can only score a real goal in the B league...and even then it barely counts!
Response:

Where do I start?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 24th, 2009 @ 7:57AM


Well, before I forget, Condon, you need to go back to school, or get hooked on phonics or something, because my 3yr-old can spell wayyyyy ahead of your Gr. 2 level, And don;'t think I'll forget that shot about scoring only two in yer lil practice there last week. It would probably have turned out more like you taking the puck and leaving with tears in your eyes. Hopefully Mantin, or whoever the puppet master is will reverse the curse, and we'll have a fair fight. And Park......man, where do I begin. I don't want to make any prediction as to what will happen tonight, but I have a personal goal to reach tonight for a special cause back home. Hopefully no one will get in my way, or Old Time Hockey will return, and I would NOT want to be on that train track. So, without anything further to amuse you, I'll let my actions speak louder than words...
Response:

and...

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 24th, 2009 @ 7:59AM


I'm so broke it's not funny, so Tuck will definitely NOT get any of our beers, they go to TUCK for fuck sakes! They could buy all of us beer for cryin out loud! I will personally agree to take it easy, and give anyone on Tuck a free pass for every 6-pack they give me.
Response:

marshy and McDoc

BY: goaliem31
Mar 24th, 2009 @ 8:29AM


no i was suggesting that marshy would have scored a ton of goals. but i was being nice so that i wouldn't upset the other net. and yes doc... marshy would have doubled up your scoring, LOL

oh, marshy i have dyslexia bitch... i know my spelling sucks!!! LOL!!!
DEAL WITH IT!!! HAHAHA
Response:

BY: habs101
Mar 24th, 2009 @ 8:35PM


If anyone is wondering why the whale has added youth to the team it is not for their speed or their ability to score. It is the simple fact they are not old enough to drink and make great DDs.
Response:

forgive me

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 25th, 2009 @ 8:44PM


I'm sorry J-Rod, I still love you, you had me at hello...see you next Tues. you shower whore. Looking forward to at least one missle guided in your direction.
Response:

New post-game spot on Tues. night!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 25th, 2009 @ 8:49PM


Mc Buffalo Wings a.k.a McDermott and myself were unpleasantly informed that Murphy's has an 11:00 cut-off for food, so we were forced last night to take our hunger and thirst elsewhere. That somewhere was EBA's in Hanover, right around the corner from Murphy's. They have awesome food, and 99-cent drafts on Tues night. YESm I said 99-cents! They have plenty of room, and plenty of big-screen TV's to watch the nightly highlights. I'm thinkin that everyone should jump on board, and Make EBA's our Tues. night home for after-hockey replenishment.
Response:

Fantastic

BY: PaleWhale
Mar 26th, 2009 @ 8:24AM


We were at Murphys the other night and they seemed to be getting too classy ($$$) for us peasants and were throwiing around some local places...5 olde, Mollys, ramuntos...etc..
But, EBA's is a good idea.
Response:

hey guys, check me out

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 26th, 2009 @ 3:26PM


A while back I started writing articles on Bleacherreport.com. I think it's worth checking out, and read my articles I've written. I've had them all published, and even edited by some top sports writers. The most recent was about the Alex Ovechkin issue of over-dramatic goal celebrations. Check it out at www.bleacherreport.com, search for Greg Marsh. Thanks fellas, let me know what you think.
Response:

DAMN!

BY: kpark
Mar 26th, 2009 @ 7:08PM


I didn't think about that! Shit, it's too late to add DD's to the Nords! Next year!
Response:

Good

BY: rgrunds
Mar 26th, 2009 @ 7:53PM


You have a voice. A little editing would make it clearer.

I'm a professional writer.

If you like, I'll edit a piece for you. No charge. I just like ideas.

Every writer needs editing and comment from time to time.

Keep writing. Go fucker, go.

ES
Response:

Thx Bob

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 27th, 2009 @ 10:00AM


I'm sure a little editing would help, I'm not sure how much you'd help, but I'm enjoying writing about hockey. Where do you write professionally? Anything I could see in a magazine or newspaper?
Response:

That's the idea

BY: rgrunds
Mar 27th, 2009 @ 11:32AM


The idea is to enjoy it. I wouldn't fuck with that. You wrote several articles which means you think about writing a lot. The thing about you is you have a code of life.

I see a couple writing habits that obscure your ideas. I'll take one of your articles and show you what I mean.

If you want you can see my latest book on amazon.com. "Light Nights and Wet Feet A Walk Through Modern Scotland". It's also on Barnesandnoble.com. My stuff is mostly on food/travel and the culture of food. I was a chef for a long time. Paid for a lot of school. I also published articles in midwestern magazines (Northern Ohio Live, The Cleveland Plain Dealer, periodicals in Vermont, etc.

I also write legal briefs all the time.

That's it.

ES


Response:

Campion all year round?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 27th, 2009 @ 9:44PM


I would just like to know how many of you UVHLers would be interested in playing the entire UVHL season at Campion? We may not be able to have all three games in one night, but who cares? As long as we had one game per week, we would all still be on the same schedule. If ice time is the problem, I totally understand. But who wouldn't want to drink beer after EVERY SINGLE GAME, EVERY FUCKING WEEK? I for one live in Lebanon, and this would work well for me, but I understand that a lot of guys come from Woodstock, Killington, Rut-Vegas, Pomfret, and surrounding area. So they may have a problem with that. Just a thought, maybe a Home/Road game option. One week at Campion, one week at UA. Just throwing out some ideas, I just think that the atmosphere at Campion works well, maybe the beer is just a GREAT incentive!
Response:

BY: Oliver
Mar 28th, 2009 @ 7:07AM


Personally, I'm a fan of Woodstock.

Response:

Editor Pal/J.B. McKinley

BY: rgrunds
Mar 28th, 2009 @ 7:12AM


He's always looking for copy. Doesn't pay a lot, but you get something. He may want a Canadian take on the code of sport.

You'd speak directly with him.

If you are interested, let me know.

ES
Response:

Bring it on!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 7th, 2009 @ 9:12AM


No fucking excuses Storm Queens! I hope you have every single one of your best players tonight. I am sick and tired of your fucking whining. We play at 8:35, so it won't be past your bedtimes, but I'm sure you'll still be cranky. No matter the outcome it is going to be some great hockey tonight, but I hope you have your A-game because we will. GAME ON!!!
Response:

Scores?

BY: rgrunds
Apr 8th, 2009 @ 6:51AM


As they say in Korea

Scores prease.


Response:

Captain Calder takes one for the team

BY: vtdownhiller
Apr 8th, 2009 @ 12:21PM


A Goalieless brewcrew at the late game was faced with some difficult decisions when Captain Calder stepped up and donned the pads for his goaltending debut and led his team to a 9-7 victory. Turning away a borage of shots he is a shoein for POW...Amazing effort that shouldn't go unnoticed and no PB you are not in danger of being replaced, Kevin was heard to say that once was enough. Thanks to JT for the loaners for the evening, McD commented that Kevin looked like an oversized Turner out there..
Response:

I couda played

BY: rgrunds
Apr 8th, 2009 @ 1:13PM


Hey...!

I couda played....put me in coach...

ES
Response:

if we had only known...

BY: hkydoc
Apr 8th, 2009 @ 3:11PM


...we would have put you in there Grundy, but their goalie was a no show and we had to make due with zero notice, eh!
Response:

O.K.

BY: rgrunds
Apr 8th, 2009 @ 3:37PM


I feel better.

Where's my fuzzy bunny....


Response:

BY:
Apr 9th, 2009 @ 6:40AM


It was a good close game right to the end for the most part, some Queens players need to stop acting like 6 year olds on the ice every game....(goaltender) embarrassing to the game of hockey, play the game without any whinning
Response:

FUCK

BY: habman
Apr 10th, 2009 @ 10:51PM


FUCK
Response:

Park, you caved, I knew you would

BY: The Dark Canuck
Apr 13th, 2009 @ 3:54PM


Once again, Frenchy's whining like a little BITCH, " Oh boo hoo, I can't make the 7 o'clock game guys" has probably made you change your mind. Why not have HIM miss out for once? Who gives a flying fuck what he wants anyway? He constantly criticizes our refs, our schedules, EVERYTHING! I for one will gladly put him on his ass (again) without a doubt the next time we play, and anyone on their team that wants to answer the bell can step up. I have NEVER seen anyone embarrass themselves, their team and the UVHL like he does. He continues to rant and rave like a retard that just got their pudding taken from them. The level of skill the Kingers bring to the UVHL is great, and I want them back next season, but If they have Frenchy as their goalie, they can fuck right off.
Response:

Actually...the Gamblers requested the 8:35 game

BY: hkydoc
Apr 13th, 2009 @ 6:41PM


...so that they could face Frenchy. The Kings were all set to get a sub in net, but the Gamblers wanted the real deal. It should be a great game! See you on the ice!
Response:

Video Tapes

BY: rgrunds
Apr 14th, 2009 @ 8:18AM


What about making a CD of all the playoff games. It would be a good archive and players would buy them. Worthwhile, I think.

I'd buy one.

Yes?
Response:

Better Idea

BY: SK8VT
Apr 14th, 2009 @ 11:17AM


Why dont we instead video tape frenchy so he realizes what a whinny lilttle bitch he looks like out on the ice, then he can see for himsself how big of an embarressment he really is
Response:

Go G-Men

BY: The Dark Canuck
Apr 14th, 2009 @ 1:37PM


Do the Nords a favor and beat the snot out of the Queens. Especially Frenchy...get in his kitchen and get him off his game....He'll self-combust from there
Response:

I agree

BY: The Dark Canuck
Apr 14th, 2009 @ 1:39PM


I still think he'd probably not take responsibility, and whine like a little bitch. Au revoir to the Kings , I hope they'll be someone else's problem next season.
Response:

Kelly Don't Flail Your Whale...mindless groupie wants to know scores

BY: rgrunds
Apr 23rd, 2009 @ 6:42AM


I was a mindless groupie...I lived on Diet Soda and Cheese corn during the UVHL playoffs and fucking want to know who will drink pepsi from the Whalen Cup.

ES
Response:

well now!!

BY: goaliem31
Apr 24th, 2009 @ 11:50AM


it seems to me that if the Nords had won the league there would have been a write up two days after the game... now its pushing two weeks and still no final write ups for the last games or a short blurb of thanks to the teams and all that played... lets get on the ball boys...
Response:

Kelly, stop touching yourself

BY: rgrunds
Apr 26th, 2009 @ 1:41PM


and update the games.

"I was a mindless groupie...."

ES
Response:

I agree

BY: The Dark Canuck
Apr 27th, 2009 @ 4:08PM


I agree totally with Condon. The fact that KP may or may not have been pissing out his ass last week, should not prevent him from a write-up. If McDrizzle is in charge of the write-ups, then I understand. Trying to balance 642 wings plus a VAT of Bleu, with his 16 ice times per week, and Montreal weekends, he's a little busy. Congrats to the Gamblers on behalf of the Nordiques. Looking forward already to the competition getting even better next season. Have a great summer boys...
Response:

Gamblers win

BY: The Dark Canuck
Apr 27th, 2009 @ 4:09PM


Gamblers win...HUGE comeback, Gamblers win....end of story
Response:

642 Wings....a metric ton..Ha

BY: rgrunds
Apr 27th, 2009 @ 6:22PM


this place is fun

I loff dis contries....


Response:

Sorry, Grundy...my bad!

BY: hkydoc
May 5th, 2009 @ 4:01PM


I take the full and total blame for not getting the scores and write-ups done within a day of the Whalen Cup Finals. Kelly is completely innocent, and there is a petition going around to replace me with a retarded midget as co-commish for next season...hey wait...that kinda sounds like me anyways!
Response:

Totally my fault, eh....

BY: hkydoc
May 5th, 2009 @ 4:04PM


I offer no excuses for my total lack of compassion for our players and fans, my utter loss of passion (after losing to the Storm Queens in the semis) for the world's coolest game and not getting my important work done on time... Kelly is blameless, my bad, fellas... I only hope that when the write-ups are done that they will be worth the wait in your eyes! I hate myself!!! - McD
Response:

Uhhhh...ooohh...aaaahhh...

BY: hkydoc
May 5th, 2009 @ 4:08PM


FYI: Kelly usually touches himself while perousing the UVHL website, especially to pics of Nick "Dr. McSelfish" Bayley and Mikey "Threesome" O'Neil. I, on the other hand, prefer it to a heaping bowl of bleu cheese and a platter of wings (not that that was ever in doubt). - McD
Response:

McD, please say it isn't true

BY: rgrunds
May 6th, 2009 @ 9:10AM


you didn't really violate an innocent portion of wings....did you...?

Couldn't you at least stay within your own species?

ES
Response:

Kelly

BY: rgrunds
May 6th, 2009 @ 9:11AM


You stop that.....
Response:

Stains on the ceiling

BY: rgrunds
May 6th, 2009 @ 9:12AM


You get those off.....
Response:

Grundy

BY: The Dark Canuck
May 6th, 2009 @ 1:39PM


Here's an idea, why don't YOU collaborate with Greg Hadley for next season to resurrect the UVHL Bruins franchise? I'd love to see some new talent in the U, and I know he wants to play, and bring back a team next season. Any thoughts?
Response:

I always have thoughts

BY: rgrunds
May 6th, 2009 @ 3:21PM


their quality is the issue.

I don't mind talking to him. I have an accumulation of good skaters who might be interested, but they live around Stowe.

I'll think it over.

more later niiggaman.

ES
Response:

BY: ghadley
May 7th, 2009 @ 4:53PM


give me a call if you want to discuss this any further, I have a few guys alreayd locked up so it's in the works.
Response:

Message to G. Hadley

BY: rgrunds
May 7th, 2009 @ 6:54PM


I left a message on his cell. I think. Woodbury VT.

Does Greg have an email address?
Response:

Ovechkin death threat traced to Marshy

BY: rgrunds
May 8th, 2009 @ 8:05AM


Down boi, down.


Response:

BY: ghadley
May 8th, 2009 @ 9:15AM


sorry about that email ghadley@vermontsportsalesagency.com
Response:

wtf?

BY: The Dark Canuck
May 8th, 2009 @ 2:40PM


Grundy, please tell me...what the F%$# are you smokin? I've had some good chronic growing up in ONT. But I think you are in your own little world sometimes. Ovechkin Death Threat? And PLEASE, if you and Hadley start a team, this creates a problem. Every time I score on Hadley I get REAL close and scream... YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.....Ask him about it, I'm sure he's soiled a pair of shorts or two due to shear mind-blowing fear. If you want that kind of action, please....go in net. Otherwise I'll have to put up with his slashes, spears..and un-welcomed advances.
Response:

It

BY: rgrunds
May 8th, 2009 @ 3:21PM



Response:

It's True

BY: rgrunds
May 8th, 2009 @ 3:22PM


Someone made a death threat against Ovechkin. It was on Yahoo.

I am in my own, little world. Yup.

I wouldn't want to come between you and Hadley. You have your right to a private life.
Response:

UVHL BRUINS

BY: ghadley
May 12th, 2009 @ 1:35PM


Looking to ge the bruins back for six teams let me know if we have anone out there looking for a new team. plus if you tal to any storm kings who feel we want to play again have then touch base. GO BRUINS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Response:

BY: ghadley
May 12th, 2009 @ 1:38PM


sorry i thought I could hit a spell check first, kelly on that will ya.
Response:

Me and one other

BY: rgrunds
May 12th, 2009 @ 4:20PM


Try Dave Pavlik. Czech national team and pro here.

He's real good. Get him before Kelly figures out email.

Dave Pavlik 802-229-6941
Response:

too late

BY: The Dark Canuck
May 12th, 2009 @ 9:07PM


already forwarded the contact info to the CO -COMMISH. Also a NORDIQUE....suck on that boy toy...
Response:

Marshy, you dildo lapper

BY: rgrunds
May 13th, 2009 @ 5:36AM


O.K. you have really gone too far this time..."boy toy"...

Ooooooo.


Response:

BY: ghadley
May 13th, 2009 @ 9:12AM


Now I kow you are a ONE WAY, You know we lost the Storm Kings and you know I want to get the bruins back up and running for 2010 and you kelly the co Commish is taking players that email into the website for your team ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME KELLY?????????????? Your team is full already what are you goiing to start cutting your exisitng players now,,,,,,,,,,,,,, Take your head out of your fuckin ass and lets figure this out you baboon fucking sloth!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Response:

well nothing new there...

BY: goaliem31
May 13th, 2009 @ 11:04AM


i mean kelly scoffed up a player or two that were suppose to play for the gamblers... but we still see how that worked out for him. Hads, don't worry about kelly trying to make a ringer of a team... won't happen
good luck getting guys bud and see you on the ice
Response:

Person Thought to Be Kelly Park

BY: rgrunds
May 17th, 2009 @ 8:03AM


seen in Men's clothing. Vice squad did not recognize based on photos.

Believed to be heading for liason with a Ms. "Marshy".

Who knows.
Response:

hockey Doc/ Serious Question/Accromium

BY: rgrunds
May 17th, 2009 @ 8:06AM


I seemed to have strained the somethings around my accromium. How long will it take to recover. It hurts to slide my stick out to the side as my elbow leaves my body.

I reached behind to the rear seat for something and heard a poppiing noise in my shoulder. No pain unless I try to raise my arm for a throwing motion or something.

Thanks,

Bob
Response:

we don't need em

BY: The Dark Canuck
May 22nd, 2009 @ 4:53PM


We are losing the McGee brothers apparently, so we WILL be losing a big plus for our team. I could care less about some dude with all the hype of a superstar, The Nords will win the Whalen Cup, Hopefully the New-look UVHL Bruins will have a decent goalie...oh, sorry Hads, I forgot. YOU"RE THE GOALIE!!!!
Response:

Are you the goalie?

BY: rgrunds
May 22nd, 2009 @ 5:04PM


Mr. G. Hadley,

Marshy says you are the goalie. Please advise. If you are, I will look elsewhere. I read your profile and it seems you can skate out as well as play goalie well.

Please let me know.

BG
Response:

Ice it first, eh

BY: hkydoc
May 28th, 2009 @ 7:00PM


Hey, Bob. With the little info you provided here is what I can tell you. Best case scenario is that you just strained it a little and with rest and ice and keeping it in a pain-free range of motion it will recover on its own in 1-2 weeks depending on how bad it is. However, you may have hurt something inside like cartilage, rotator cuff, or other connective tissue, and it may warrant an orthopedic evaluation and/or an MRI. I say give it a couple of days with rest and ice, and if it doesn't seem to be improving go to your PCP for a referral to a good orthopedist. I can recommend a few if you like.
Response:

BY: ghadley
May 29th, 2009 @ 7:22AM


BG,

thats my plan to get in net if my knee goes under the knife again I wil let you know
Response:

FINALS GAME ONE WINGS VS BLUE CHEESE

BY: ghadley
May 29th, 2009 @ 7:24AM


Anyone up for meeting out to sat night to watch game one and have some wings and blu?
Response:

Mr. Hadley/Possible knee surgery

BY: rgrunds
May 29th, 2009 @ 8:02AM


Good luck with that.

If you need surgery, Marshy and I will be glad to perform it.
Response:

Thank you, More Serious/Your charge for exam

BY: rgrunds
May 29th, 2009 @ 8:17AM


It has been hurting for about 3 months. Gradual improvement, but seriously weak. I had a great arm and could throw from center field. Now I can barely toss a cloth dog toy 20 feet.

What do you charge for an examination?

BG
Response:

WTF?

BY: The Dark Canuck
May 31st, 2009 @ 11:50AM


I am in no way performing any cutting, other than nice thick steaks for my pal Hads! You're on your own Grundy...surprise surprise
Response:

steaks for Hadley

BY: rgrunds
May 31st, 2009 @ 12:10PM


do you fulff up his pillow too?
Response:

Don't worry Marshy

BY: rgrunds
May 31st, 2009 @ 1:34PM


Don't worry, some day you will have sex with an erect primate....hang in there...I am SURE of it.



Response:

Grundy...

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jun 1st, 2009 @ 8:07AM


you are one sick fuck... What Hads and I do in our time is no one's biz but everyone on W.A.G.H.I.P.com If ya don't know, now ya know N$%#@!
Response:

TV dinner by the pool

BY: rgrunds
Jun 1st, 2009 @ 8:37AM


Marshy, you are so right. Privacy must be respected.

This is fun.....violent insults....ahhhh


TV dinner by the pool
I'm so glad I finished school,
LIFE...
is such a bowl of cherries.



Response:

More advice, eh

BY: hkydoc
Jun 1st, 2009 @ 11:41AM


Bob - I'd head straight to Dr. Peter Loescher in Sharon, VT. You'll need a PCP referral to see him. It doesn't sound like a chiropractic problem to me, especially since it is 3 months old, and you"ll likely need imaging to diagnose it fully. I'd anticipate some rehab through physical therapy as well. Call me if you have any questions.
Response:

Oh, Peter's number...

BY: hkydoc
Jun 1st, 2009 @ 11:42AM


763-8000
Response:

Hockey this summer?

BY: kpark
Jun 1st, 2009 @ 1:37PM


Anyone know of some good hockey this summer? Anywhere within an hour of Hartford? I need to get my fat ass on the ice. Anyone willing to carpool to Rut-Vegas?

KP
Response:

thank you

BY: rgrunds
Jun 2nd, 2009 @ 9:50AM


thanks for the referral. I'm goint to a couple goalie camps this summer, hope therapy doesn't interfere.

It is slowly getting better. The shoulder is an interesting joint. Not as simple and sturdy and the hip. Too many parts that move.

wah

ES
Response:

Union Arena, eh!

BY: hkydoc
Jun 18th, 2009 @ 11:02AM


It starts next week!
Response:

summer ice at the U!!!

BY: goaliem31
Jun 22nd, 2009 @ 8:29AM


let me know when EH!!!!!!
i need to get on the ice cause camps are going to be starting soon... and i need to start getting into skating shape sooner this year
Response:

Really?

BY: kpark
Jun 26th, 2009 @ 9:12AM


Camps? Maybe you should worry about securing a spot on a UVHL squad first. Right now, they have you pegged as a 3rd stringer behind Grundy & Willy Meyer.

Keep focused kid.
Response:

REPORTS OUT OF \WHALE CAMP

BY: bruins8
Jul 3rd, 2009 @ 9:40AM


Reports out of early WHALE CAMP say longtime LEAF/WHALER Dave Fitts will not be back for the 2009/2010 season after season ending reconstructive leg surgery in January 2009. FITTS who thought he would be back FOR THE SEASON, NOW does not think he will be back playing until Summer league 2010. This is good news for long time UVHL SISSY/Hanger Kelly Park and the rest of the snot green Nordiques who he has terrorized for years.
Response:

It IS a sad day for sure!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jul 3rd, 2009 @ 3:40PM


Fittsy's on-ice tenacity is a quailty that the Whale will DEFINITELY miss. My thoughts and prayers go out to Dave and his family, which will no doubt be going through a tough year with Dave moping around the house, and WISHING he could be out there on the ice. I sincerely hope he'll make a come-back in time for the up-coming season. Maybe explore the Referee avenue, if you'd still like some light skating? OR...be The Vermont Nordiques "PERSONAL" shower,equipment and hydration facilitator. Pretty sweet title though huh?
Response:

Sad news to the UVHL

BY: kpark
Jul 7th, 2009 @ 10:11AM


The news is now spreading through UVHL-nation about Fittsy's demise. Apparently the UVHL Cheerleaders Association for the Mentally ill and Slightly Retarded will be holding a candle light vigil in front of the Union Arena in memories of Fitsy's leg at 3am on Wednesday, July 8th.

Fitsy is a legend in his own mind, and has done wonders for the UVHL. From his tenacious bear hugs on the ice to his rugged good looks have brought in revenue & promoted inter-team bonding throughout the league.

I would also like to extend the olive branch to Dave and offer him the executive hydration specialist position on the Nordiques while he recovers. Get well soon big guy, and show up for a couple of beers.

KP
Response:

Weak writeup McBuffalo Wings.

BY: kpark
Jul 8th, 2009 @ 2:38PM


That was weak. WEAK WEAK WEAK. Congrats to the Gamblers though.
Response:

K Park Models New Nords Accessory..

BY: rgrunds
Jul 24th, 2009 @ 6:27AM


Lime Green feather boa...


"Do I look like Michelle Kwan, now?"
Response:

Settle down Grundy!

BY: kpark
Jul 27th, 2009 @ 10:10AM


First of all, it is not "LIME" Green, it is "PUKE" Green. Big difference. And Boas are sexy. You KNOW IT!!!!!
Response:

Stop it Chiffon

BY: rgrunds
Jul 27th, 2009 @ 12:41PM


you Know I'm not your colorist.

And, Marshy says you have to stop blowing kisses at him when the parents come to visit. Otherwise they'll find out...
Response:

enough is enough

BY: The Dark Canuck
Aug 2nd, 2009 @ 11:08AM


Grundy...where you come up with this shit, I'll never know. Somewhere lost in that black hole of a brain you have, comes witless humor-like blurbs that have absolutely NO relevance at all. And besides, I'd rather have him blow me kisses than yell at me. I'm just a sensitive Canadian, what can I say?
Response:

Marshpile

BY: rgrunds
Aug 2nd, 2009 @ 12:01PM


You have NO idea what's in that brain...the U.N. has appointed a commission...The pope has been consulted.....


Just stop kissing Kelly on the mouth in public and you'll be in good shape.
Response:

=(

BY: The Dark Canuck
Aug 2nd, 2009 @ 8:48PM


jealous
Response:

Marshy

BY: rgrunds
Aug 3rd, 2009 @ 6:34AM


good one...

ha HA...
Response:

Marshy

BY: rgrunds
Aug 3rd, 2009 @ 6:34AM


good one...

ha HA...
Response:

Marshy begins pre-season workout....

BY: rgrunds
Aug 8th, 2009 @ 9:26AM


Drives into Woodstock to stomp some citizens....
Response:

huh?

BY: kpark
Aug 11th, 2009 @ 10:33AM


I have no idea what you are talking about!
Response:

Sponsors

BY: kpark
Aug 11th, 2009 @ 10:37AM


Hey guys, with the upcoming season on the horizon and planning our budget, I was thinking that it may be a good idea to pull in sponsors to help alleviate some of the financial stress a hockey season can put on some fellows, therefore freeing up some much needed money for the post game activities.

I know that Dead River is sponsoring Hadley's new team, and I would be willing to post each sponsor to the UVHL.com homepage. Both for sponsors of teams and if a company just wants to sponsor the league. Spread the word, it would be beneficial to everyone.

KP
Response:

workout

BY: rgrunds
Aug 12th, 2009 @ 7:56AM


consists of the aerobic benefits of picking fights with local gentry...
Response:

waist of breath

BY: goaliem31
Aug 13th, 2009 @ 12:38PM


park... you might agree with this one...
when Grunds write on here, nothing ever makes any sense!!!
Response:

that's "waste"

BY: rgrunds
Aug 13th, 2009 @ 1:10PM


not waist...

You'll get it...give it a little time....
Response:

the terms

BY: rgrunds
Aug 13th, 2009 @ 8:58PM


What are the terms? Does a sponsor have to undertake all the expenses for a team? If not, how does a partial sponsor get publicity for his contribution.

I know some possibilities, but have to present details.

BG

ES
Response:

COST

BY: The Dark Canuck
Aug 14th, 2009 @ 10:56AM


is the sponsorship going to lower the cost for hockey players, or is the sponsorship just going to lower the league's costs? I wouldn't know where to begin to ask about people sponsoring a team they'd never heard of, in a league not many non-hockey people in the area have heard of. I would be all for the "Digital Flannel Nordiques" or something like that with a better name. But I'm also guessing JT would rather have someone else shell out money than him, so we all could enjoy and really use a break on registration. I'll see what I can do to help, so should everyone else...
Response:

Ahhh Grundy

BY: The Dark Canuck
Aug 14th, 2009 @ 10:59AM


Although I WOULD love to satopa mudhole in a lot of slowpoke idiots in Woodstock, I would not lower myself to assaulting common citizens. I have a family now, and cannot afford to be deported. HOWEVER......if someone were to say, strap on skates, and fuck with me, then we shall see. Always good to get the aggression out in any way possible. You really are off in your own little world aren't you?
Response:

Actually, I'm quite normal

BY: rgrunds
Aug 14th, 2009 @ 1:31PM


I'm a normal....um......Hawaiian..

that's it


beniggaout....
Response:

UVHL PRE-SEASON

BY: hkydoc
Aug 18th, 2009 @ 10:07AM


UVHLers:

Kelly and I grabbed some pre-season ice at Campion as follows:

SUNDAY 9/13 8:50 - 10:20 PM - pre-season

SUNDAY 9/20 8:30 - 10:00 PM - pre-season

TUESDAY 9/22 9:20 - 10:50 PM - pre-season

TUESDAY 9/29 9:00 - 10:30 PM - pre-season

SUNDAY 10/4 9:00 - 10:30 PM - pre-season

SUNDAY 10/11 9:20 - 10:50 PM - pre-season

We are looking for 22 skaters to commit @ $75.00 each for all six 90 minute skates. Contact Kelly or myself to get in on the pre-season action. We may have a tryout player or two drop in on a skate or two for $15 to place them with an appropriate team. The goalies are all set with Kenny and JT, but the other 4 UVHL goalies can arrange to split time with them so they're not swiss cheese on Oct 13th!

SEE YOU ON THE ICE!

McD


Response:

I'll be there!

BY: kpark
Aug 18th, 2009 @ 12:50PM


I will be there, with ONE PURPOSE, and one purpose only. To totally annihilate the confidence of Kenny "The Blade" Lallier.

KP
Response:

hey boys

BY: The Dark Canuck
Aug 18th, 2009 @ 2:02PM


count me in...McD, I will bring the money to you asap...unless I can bring it to the first skate? Either way, let me know
Response:

let me pitch

BY: rgrunds
Aug 18th, 2009 @ 3:08PM


I'm available to fill in if needed.

ES
Response:

Bring it ON !!!!

BY: KenL
Aug 19th, 2009 @ 11:30AM



Response:

Re: I'll be there

BY: KenL
Aug 19th, 2009 @ 11:37AM


Kelly,

If you can pry your ass off the couch, I look forward to seeing the new moves you have been dreaming about. If they are anything like the past, I will at least get a good laugh!

You should have gotten more than 6 pre-season skates, your going to need more than that to work off the summer slump hangin over the belt!

"The Blade"?
Response:

New Feature

BY: kpark
Aug 19th, 2009 @ 1:33PM


Hey guys, I've got a new feature in the forum that will allow you to select whether or not you want to be notified when a NEW forum thread has been created.

Just login, then go to your personal settings and check the box to Notify you upon new thread.

KP
Response:

last test here!

BY: kpark
Oct 4th, 2009 @ 4:54PM


This is the last test.

It is going to look SWEET.

YOU KNOW IT!!!

BLAH BLAH BLAH
Response:

BY: kpark
Oct 7th, 2009 @ 10:04PM



Response:

SUB

BY: habman
Aug 22nd, 2009 @ 11:32AM


Can't make most of those. Would like to play if your short a night or two.
Response:

BY:
Aug 22nd, 2009 @ 4:56PM


Ill skate if you need more skaters.
Response:

Game Times! UPDATE!

BY: kpark
Aug 24th, 2009 @ 4:48AM


Hey guys,
I thought you would all like to know that the rink has decided to drop the DOUBLE SCRAPES in-between games this year. That means that the late games will be starting 20 minutes earlier than the past 2 seasons.

OLD GAME TIMES:
6:30pm, 8:05pm & 9:40pm

NEW GAME TIMES:
6:30pm, 7:55pm & 9:20pm

I don't know about you guys, but I'm pretty psyched about this one. McDermott, that is 20 MORE MINUTES for you to shove wings & blue cheese down your throat after a late game.

KP

Response:

Predictions!

BY: kpark
Aug 24th, 2009 @ 2:25PM


First skate of the year! I'm gonna make KENNY CRY!!!! OOOOH YEAH!
Response:

TRIPLE ORDER

BY: hkydoc
Aug 24th, 2009 @ 6:22PM


Wow! That means I can get THREE dozen wings down every Tuesday night instead of just two! I'm getting hard just thinking about all the delicious buffalo sauce and bleu cheese...mmmmm...

Make sure you guys thank Vic for stopping the double scrapes, eh!

See you on the ice! YAAAHHH!

McD
Response:

McDiesel

BY: kpark
Aug 25th, 2009 @ 6:57AM


Hey McD, how's that off-season diet going? You better be down at LEAST 20lbs coming into season 7! I've got a major case of the hockey blues right now, I NEED some ice asap!

KP
Response:

BY: habman
Aug 25th, 2009 @ 7:12PM


Thanks for the organizational hockey skills guys. I'm looking forward to some puck.
Response:

A cure for the summertime hockey blues?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Aug 26th, 2009 @ 2:15PM


I too am experiencing some hockey blues, and have decided that if I can get enough interest, I am going to have a regular Sunday night skate at Campion rink in Hanover. On Wed. the 2nd of Sept. I am going to have a meeting with Dick Dodds, to arrange a time. I would like to get some feedback on who might commit to playing regularly. I am one that really likes to skate at least twice a week, and NEED to have that extra icetime to stay sharp. Some folks have committed to other groups already, but the icetime just didn't work for me, as I have young children, and I myself need something later in the evening. If I can get at least 16 guys that show enough interest, I will commit to a timeslot every week. However, I'm not going to be on the hook for icetime, as I will NOT pay anything extra out of my pocket. THIS my friends is how regular groups are started, and everyone wants to skate in a regular group, that is not only competitive, but fun. Let me know ASAP at gmarshy77@gmail.com if you are interested.
Response:

ahhh Parky

BY: The Dark Canuck
Aug 26th, 2009 @ 2:22PM


I think you should try something different this season...maybe wait til you SCORE on LaLallier before you trash talk him. Every time you yell K E N N N N N N N N N N Y Y Y Y Y Y ...it just pumps him up, and he STONES your ass! I've seen you flat-out embarrass goalies before, so try that out, see what happens!
Response:

Marshy!

BY: kpark
Aug 26th, 2009 @ 2:25PM


No way! That's what makes it so much fun. I don't really care if I score, I just like trying to mentally break Kenny into a million little pieces! Then I don't score on him ON PURPOSE to build him back up. Gosh Marshy, you just don't get it.

KP
Response:

ok

BY: The Dark Canuck
Aug 26th, 2009 @ 2:38PM


So THAT'S how you do it? Ok, so this season I'm not going to blow my load half way through the season, I'm gonna pace myself to score 20 goals, and 30 assists....in 6 games! No, seriously, I'm NOT gonna have a repeat performance of last year! I'm only interested in making Greg "WAGHIP" Hadley, and J-Roc Jerod Condor Condon fill their crease with tears, after an onslaught of relentless rubber rockets flying at break-neck speed past their flabby girly-mon bodies!
Response:

I WISH

BY: kpark
Aug 26th, 2009 @ 2:41PM


Hey buddy, I wish I could commit to it full time, but I'm already locked into the 6pm skate with Potter. What time are you looking at?

I may be that guy who puts my sneakers on with all my equipment, runs home puts my kids to bed and then heads back to the rink!

KP
Response:

I need ya!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Aug 26th, 2009 @ 7:00PM


Well, I think I'd be looking at around 830-10 or 9-1030 if possible. Something in that timeframe. Why not CANCEL the check for Obar, and jump ship. JK buddy, If I could, I'd be in for the 6 o'clock skate, just doesn't gel with my work/dinnertime/family time schedule. Se what I can do though...
Response:

Sorry, eh...

BY: hkydoc
Aug 26th, 2009 @ 10:22PM


I'm in with the Northstars at 7:20-8:50 on Sunday nights already @ Hartford, Buddy. Me, Tom Dakai, Roger Phillips, and Billy Clark all skate Northstars Sunday night... Plus, I do the Tues/Thurs morning Campion skate, too. Good luck, I hope you get this off the ground! I prefer the later time on Sundays, too. The 6:00 Obar-Potter skate is way too fuckin' early for me, even though it is the best pick-up skate in the area.

McD
Response:

BY: habman
Aug 27th, 2009 @ 6:47PM


I understand the 2nd skate needs for sure Marshy. There is a small chance I can make Sunday night work, but can't commit at this point. Keep me updated on its status.
Response:

Marsh la femme

BY: rgrunds
Aug 28th, 2009 @ 2:11PM


let me know if you need a goalie

ES
Response:

I can smell the ice!

BY: kpark
Sep 10th, 2009 @ 8:46AM


I really can't wait for Sunday. I can already smell the ice. It's been a long offseason and hopefully I'm not in too bad of shape. I could look like Pelletier and STILL light up Lallier. I've been working on a new move in my basement, it's called Le Sieve Part Duex. I put my 3 year old son in net, he actually is more coordinated than Kenny, and then I start out with a head fake......well, I don't want to ruin it online. You'll just have to see the move this Sunday.

KP
Response:

I can taste the wings!

BY: hkydoc
Sep 10th, 2009 @ 1:53PM


Are bleu cheese and buffalo wings the only reason I play hockey? Hmmm...that is a tough question to answer! Or is it the locker room banter, the feel of the cold air over my bald head, or the pure satisfaction of getting the most 4th assists in the history of men's league? I just can't put my finger on it, but one thing is for sure, and that is my love affair with hockey is lifelong! YAAAHH!

SEE YOU ON THE ICE!

McD
Response:

Re: I can smell the ice

BY: KenL
Sep 11th, 2009 @ 6:46AM


Hey Kelly,

I think you have been sniffing glue or something! You should have finished the story about putting your 3 year old son in the net. You put the moves on him and even he shut you down! Keep practicing the moves cause we all know practice makes perfect (except in your case, where it just identifies more ways for you to f___k it up).

Sunday night - you, me & your silly move!

Later
Response:

Ahhhhh, where do I begin

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 11th, 2009 @ 2:30PM


Without a doubt, Hockey is the love of my life. I say that because I will have absolutely no chance of being with Megan Fox, AND I know I can SCORE at least a few times in the UVHL. The smell of the rink is really imprinted in my brain. I hope I can remember how to put my gear on....Time for a new twig? Oh dude, I can't wait. Who are the goalies? JT and ???
Response:

i forgot...

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 11th, 2009 @ 2:33PM


And the wings, oh yeah...bring 'em on, just don't touch McD's wings, or he WILL stab you in the neck with either a chicken bone shaved into a jailhouse shiv, or the nearest fork...whatever comes first!
Response:

That aroma is not ice...

BY: rgrunds
Sep 12th, 2009 @ 7:03PM


it's Marshy. He's in estrus and wants to mate. We have to help him....anybody have access to a small and furry mammal? Turkey season's coming soon....

hang in there.
Response:

Where did you get those stick handling skills?

BY: habman
Sep 14th, 2009 @ 9:01AM


Great skate last night Kelly. Just wanted to remind you I will be missing the next skate. I plan on being at the rest though. Go Nords!
Response:

I can't fuckin believe it...

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 14th, 2009 @ 11:38AM


I am SO fucking sore today, holy shit! I fell like I've had a herd of elephants running across my lower back. There really is no way to prepare unless you get some icetime under your belt. Other than that, really fun skate last night. JT at times looked like Timmy Thomas out there. Even though the deck WAS stacked just a LITTLE for the whites, just getting out there was a long time coming. Seemed like forever since I skated last. Let's even out the sides a little more next week boys...and gal.
Response:

yes who arwe the goalies??

BY: goaliem31
Sep 14th, 2009 @ 12:19PM


word on the street for a reputable source is that JT and Kenny have an unfair corner on the market even though i had responded to the very first email a couple minutes after getting it!! kelly get back to me on this one...
Response:

Condon = Sissy

BY: kpark
Sep 14th, 2009 @ 12:27PM


Jered, boo fucking hoo. McDermott confirmed the goaltenders before he even purchased the ice. To be honest, I don't give a shit if someone didn't make it into the skate, because ya know what? Nobody else decided to front the money to get their own skate started.

If you wanted to skate that bad, you could have gotten some ice and asked US to join. Call it preferential treatment, call it nepotism, I call it just making sure we had two reliable goalies that will show up every week. Bottom line is that we can't have every goalie there every night, but if you want to see if JT & Kenny want to share some ice time give them a call.

KP
Response:

Goddammit Marshy

BY: rgrunds
Sep 14th, 2009 @ 3:23PM


You haven't threatened me in more than a month.

I expect at least a death threat..

Get Up there boy.....flex that anger...
Response:

Who arwe the goalies

BY: KenL
Sep 14th, 2009 @ 5:48PM


Jared,

Despite what Kelly spewed, if you want to join in we did a three goalie rotation last night that worked out fine. Just say the word and we can probably work it out! I think J.T. would agree.
Response:

Well, just so you you know

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 14th, 2009 @ 8:35PM


I haven't threatened you, because you pose no threat to me whatsoever. Once I get my skates sharpened, and remember how to skate, I'll be fine..
Response:

Rotation okay

BY: hkydoc
Sep 14th, 2009 @ 8:38PM


I lined up 2 goalies ahead of time like Kelly said so we would make sure we had 2 there every night, and if they want to share it then that is up to them.

Nice skate last night everyone, but we need a few more bodies there. We only had 9 on 8 after a bum skate kept a tenacious veteran off the ice, and then one left due to asthma (didn't do your pre-season conditioning, eh?). I hate playing with 3D...mostly because I'm too fat and old to do so, and because it sucks to have to hold back and sit back to wait for the play rather than forcing it or jumping in because you can't go 100% with only 1 sub. It sucks for forwards with only 2 subs as well, because then there is no backchecking! (unless you are Will or Roger). Boo frickiddy hoo! It was still a shitload of fun and felt like Christmas!

Oh, and welcome to the new players! Looks like the Whalers have some solid pick-ups for Season 7...

See you on the ice! YAAAHH!

McD
Response:

How sore were you?

BY: hkydoc
Sep 14th, 2009 @ 8:40PM


I thought all of your workouts were supposed to get you in great shape ahead of time, Girlie-Man! HA HA HA! See you Sunday for more punishment!

McD
Response:

understood

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 15th, 2009 @ 6:03AM


No McD....I'm feeling it in my thighs, hips, mostly my lower back. Endurance was ok, my skating will likely feel better when I get my skates done. Other than that, I can't wait til next time. WHERE THE FUCK ARE THE REST OF THE NORDS? NO F-ING DEDICATION!!! Coatesy came all the way from Killington for fuck sakes!
Response:

Completely right

BY: rgrunds
Sep 15th, 2009 @ 6:17AM


Have to be efficient....don't waste assets..

you are so right.
Response:

Morning hockey showdown!

BY: hkydoc
Sep 17th, 2009 @ 10:37AM


Kenny and Jered put on a fucking show this morning after Condon was scored on with the first shot by dark, and then at least 20 minutes without a goal ensued. Kenny was spectacular and kept dark in it until a 2-2 score was eclipsed by white. Towards the end white dominated, and Jered kept dark's snipers Sinclair and Marty talking on the bench about how best to solve him - "shoot! pop in a rebound!"... it didn't matter. Both goalies looked like it was playoff time in the pre-season. Conspicuously absent was the "Mouth of the North" Kelly Park, who had threatened to join the Campion morning skate, but Park must have felt the pressure knowing that he had to go up against Kenny or Jered and didn't want to look like a fool where his basement moves are no good.

YAAAH! SEE YOU ON THE ICE, FUCKERS!

McD
Response:

CARDIGAN SKATE SUNDAYS @ 9:30 PM in NOVEMBER

BY: hkydoc
Sep 17th, 2009 @ 10:42AM


Ryan Sinclair has graciously offered the UVHLers to join the Cardigan boys (aka the "Stogies") on Sunday nights for a fast pick-up skate starting in November at the Cardigan Mountain School. It is FREE, except that we should pitch in at least $60 for a ref (if we can get one to show up out there that late).

I'm looking for a regular UVHL squad of 10-15 skaters, and a goalie or two, plus a ref that wants to keep the scrimmage honest. No excuses! The kids are in bed, your wife is at home watching porn warming up for when you get home, and dinner is already digested. So...who's comin' with me???

McD
Response:

email me

BY: goaliem31
Sep 17th, 2009 @ 12:18PM


email me... i got a question for ya...
Response:

great skate

BY: goaliem31
Sep 17th, 2009 @ 12:23PM


good skate!! had a good time!!!

Response:

I am in

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 18th, 2009 @ 1:06PM


Mcd...what time is the skate going to be? If it is after 8 it should not be a problem....aren't you already comitted to a Sunday night skate?
Response:

CARDIGAN SKATE SUNDAYS @ 9:30 PM in NOVEMBER

BY: hkydoc
Sep 18th, 2009 @ 4:47PM


CARDIGAN SKATE SUNDAYS @ 9:30 PM in NOVEMBER...

CARDIGAN SKATE SUNDAYS @ 9:30 PM in NOVEMBER...

CARDIGAN SKATE SUNDAYS @ 9:30 PM in NOVEMBER...

...just like it says in the title of the Forum post, eh!

Yeah, I skate with the Northstars, but this is a better time for me and I might do both. Are you in?

McD


Response:

we shall see

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 18th, 2009 @ 5:22PM


McD...I will likely make it most weeks, but I am supposed to be at work most Monday mornings W I c k e d early....but, I can switch with someone to make it happen. I will see you there buddy! See you Sunday!!!
Response:

BY: ghadley
Sep 21st, 2009 @ 9:24AM


McD, Do you think we could get the chef down there to make some late night wings?????????
Response:

Mmmmm...

BY: hkydoc
Sep 21st, 2009 @ 10:12AM


Jeez, Hads, if they had wings at Cardigan post-game I think I'd never leave!!!
Response:

Did anyone play in this one

BY: rgrunds
Sep 22nd, 2009 @ 6:54AM



Response:

Distance ..

BY: Z-Skate
Sep 22nd, 2009 @ 12:20PM


Where exactly is Cardigan Mtn. School? Is it more than 20 minutes from WRJ/Leb.? If not I would like to skate ..
Response:

.....

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 22nd, 2009 @ 1:56PM


Approximately 20 minutes from WRJ....
Response:

of course

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 22nd, 2009 @ 1:57PM


We skated SUN night...good times
Response:

Oh

BY: rgrunds
Sep 22nd, 2009 @ 2:42PM


i wanna play.
Response:

McDefense is pissed!

BY: hkydoc
Sep 22nd, 2009 @ 6:12PM


I'm gonna shut down, knock down, and man-handle all you UVHL rookies who think I'm gonna give you space in front of the net tonight! No more Dr. Nice Guy! Plus, Park is gonna get NOTHIN'!!!

McD
Response:

9/27 9:10 pm

BY: Z-Skate
Sep 23rd, 2009 @ 11:30AM


9:10 @ Campion is available - Looks like I can book it anytime. Who's in? Let me know. I will bring the beer - 30 pack of Blue okay?
Response:

IN

BY: kpark
Sep 23rd, 2009 @ 11:33AM


Hey Jay, Count me in. The more ice I can get before the season starts the better.

KP
Response:

Go for it

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 23rd, 2009 @ 1:21PM


I am in for 9:10...Sunday
Response:

McD is IN

BY: hkydoc
Sep 23rd, 2009 @ 4:15PM


I'd love to skate on Sunday. Let me know when you book it, Jay. Do you need the goalies' e-mail addresses?

McD
Response:

9/27/09 9:10-10:40 Booked

BY: Z-Skate
Sep 24th, 2009 @ 11:34AM


Ice is booked and waiting ..
I wonder if I should let KP know he's on the hook for the ice b/c he is the contact under UVHL - haha
The Group so fa .. Who else wants to clean-up the rust?
Ken Lallier (G),Jered Condon (G), Jay Z, Kelly Park, Ryan McGovern, Jay Campion, Shawn McDermot, Greg Marsh, Jordan McGee, Zach Aher, Dan Bloom, Will Meyers (tentative), Trey Schaft, Gary LaPerle, Ryuji Kikuchi, Dan McGee

Response:

In

BY: PaleWhale
Sep 24th, 2009 @ 2:30PM


Can you put me on the list.

Leger
Response:

PaleWhale In ..

BY: Z-Skate
Sep 24th, 2009 @ 2:51PM


On the list
Response:

Played!

BY: kpark
Sep 25th, 2009 @ 7:34AM


I don't know if you could actually call what I did out there as "playing hockey", but yes, I skated and fell down alot.
Response:

Hey fatty mcFatso

BY: kpark
Sep 25th, 2009 @ 7:36AM


McDiesel, you were brilliant on the ice tonight. Brilliant at looking like a sumo wrestler who has never actual seen ice!

Just Kidding, bud. That was a hell of a skate. I was a mess, I had NO LEGS, ENERGY or HANDS!

Can't wait for the next one. Are you around for any afternoon skates at Campion?

KP
Response:

Should be a good one!

BY: kpark
Sep 25th, 2009 @ 7:40AM


We are still looking for some skaters for Jay Zanleoni's Sunday night pickup on 9/27. I think he needs another 2 or 3 guys. Get in before it fills up.

But back to this skate, the 29th. I'm going to turn Kenny inside-out, flip him like a flap jack and then embarrass him some more with a special move that I've been dreaming about. It's called "Le Lallier impressionnant embarras".

It's gonna be pretty sweet.
Response:

Perfect!

BY: kpark
Sep 25th, 2009 @ 8:39AM


Jay, thanks again for booking this. Now all of you slugs that told him you are going to show.....you had BETTER show. How many guys are we up to now?

KP
Response:

J-Roc Condon/Arm Chest protector

BY: rgrunds
Sep 26th, 2009 @ 7:21AM


Roc-man,

I need better arm/chest protection. What make and model do you use?

ES
Response:

Grundy!

BY: kpark
Sep 26th, 2009 @ 11:13AM


Grundy, I wear PURE MUSCLE......I know that is impossible for you, but you can always dream.
Response:

You bastard

BY: rgrunds
Sep 26th, 2009 @ 11:22AM


say hi to your wife and my kids....
Response:

i wear

BY: goaliem31
Sep 26th, 2009 @ 12:03PM


i wear vaughn vision, but its like 2 or 3 years old now... i have another one i think at my house... let me look
Response:

Mmmm!

BY: rgrunds
Sep 26th, 2009 @ 12:19PM



Response:

Mmm!

BY: rgrunds
Sep 26th, 2009 @ 12:19PM


How much do you want for it?

Does it smell like Kelly?


Response:

Great pre-season so far!

BY: hkydoc
Sep 28th, 2009 @ 4:18PM


Good skates, fast, skill and timing returning...YEAH! We're off to a good start so far this fall, but I have to say Kelly's visions of grandeur ne sont pas vrai (are not true). Kelly only sees those visions when he is home alone watching Skinemax late at night pulling his own goalie, let alone trying to imagine turning LeLallier inside out. Methinks I recall a special save Kenny made last night called "LePark Especial Incroyable" (the Incredible Park Special) that made Kelly cry out like a little girl when LeLallier denied him...

As for my own debacles, Dan McGee made me look like a fat piece of Swiss Cheese on a one-on-one, and I crumpled like a wet paper bag when Jay Zanaloni pushed me down in a battle for the puck... Both of those tragic events hurt my feelings! Waaah!

If Marshy would ever start skating with the puck instead of slow down as soon as it touches his stick (if he is moving at all), he might actually get free for a blistering shot on net!!! C'mon, Big Man, move those tree trunks! Show us that all your workouts actually translate to better hockey!

Only two weeks until the puck drops for real...YAAAAHH!

McD
Response:

Camcorder ..

BY: Z-Skate
Sep 29th, 2009 @ 12:17PM


Folks - I am in need of a camcorder to borrow for about 6 months. No, not for what you dirty f-ckers are thinking. My better half needs it to video tape her clients .. no, KP she isn't a Porn Director actually a drug and alcohol counselor.
Response:

YEAH RIGHT!!!!

BY: kpark
Sep 29th, 2009 @ 12:20PM


Jay, honestly....there is no way I'm leaving you alone with my video camera! Hold on....what does your wife look like? JK.

KP
Response:

seriously?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 30th, 2009 @ 8:03AM


I could see someone lending you a cam for MAYBE a couple days or so, but 6 months? Why not my lawnmower, hedge-clipper, cup 'o sugar, Oh, and by the way. I smoke a LOT of weed. In fact, I almost forgot where I lived the other day. Is this a problem? Because I'm sure I can quit anytime. YEAH RIGHT!!!
Response:

counselor

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 30th, 2009 @ 8:06AM


Do I need Help? I'd love to meet your wife. JK ZAN...I cannot WAIT to see the Flailing Whale this season, you guys should be better, as long as Kenny's Osteo-porosis doesn't flare up!
Response:

CraigsList

BY: kpark
Sep 30th, 2009 @ 8:28AM


Hey Jay, have you tried Craigs List? Here's a list of camcorders in Vermont:

http://burlington.craigslist.org/search/?areaID=93&subAreaID=&query=camcorder&catAbbreviation=sss

KP
Response:

HkyDoc-Why does it hurt when I pee?

BY: rgrunds
Sep 30th, 2009 @ 10:55AM


I got it from the toilet seat.
It jumped up and GRABBED my meat

Or
Maybe it was Kel-ly Park
Strange things happen in the dark.
Response:

It hurts because...

BY: hkydoc
Oct 1st, 2009 @ 8:34AM


...your stanky goalie jock hasn't been washed since 1985 and you sweated right through it on Tuesday morning! (and I think you peed in it, too...just a little bit...)

McD
Response:

I feel better now...thanks

BY: rgrunds
Oct 1st, 2009 @ 8:55AM


mmm.

You're a good doctor. You know a lot.
Response:

CARDIGAN SKATE SUNDAYS @ 9:30 PM in NOVEMBER

BY: hkydoc
Oct 1st, 2009 @ 11:45AM


Ryan Sinclair has graciously offered the UVHLers to join the Cardigan boys (aka the "Stogies") on Sunday nights for a fast pick-up skate starting in November at the Cardigan Mountain School. It is FREE, except that we should pitch in at least $60 for a ref (if we can get one to show up out there that late).

I'm looking for a regular UVHL squad of 10-15 skaters, and a goalie or two, plus a ref that wants to keep the scrimmage honest. No excuses! The kids are in bed, your wife is at home watching porn warming up for when you get home, and dinner is already digested. So...who's comin' with me???

McD

Response:

Happy to help!

BY: hkydoc
Oct 1st, 2009 @ 11:49AM


Just consider this a free consultation regarding a small fraction of my vast knowledge accumulated at the one, the only, Logan College of Chiropractic. Can you believe that I was actually granted a license? I guess it pays to know the right people, eh! In fact, I slept my way to the top...(and I'm self-employed, figure that one out...).

McD
Response:

gear

BY: goaliem31
Oct 1st, 2009 @ 12:24PM


grundy i have anotherchest protector and i also have a pair of 8.5 skates if you are interested...
Response:

Goodie

BY: rgrunds
Oct 1st, 2009 @ 1:12PM


Can you tell me the model of the chest protector? I'm really sick of getting hit in the stick elbow.

What prices are you asking?

Thanks.

ES
Response:

And

BY: rgrunds
Oct 1st, 2009 @ 1:20PM


Can you tell me the condition? You played pro, so you must trust the protector BUT, you don't want it anymore so I have to ask how much life is left in it.

Thanks

ES
Response:

condition and prices

BY: goaliem31
Oct 1st, 2009 @ 4:29PM


the chest pad wasn't warn when i played pro... however it is used may need to be stitched in one spot, which is easy fix. so for you and the amount of playing you do it will still be a great deal.
the skates i wore once... i stopped wearing them cause i had 2 other pairs of skates that were all broke in. they have no rust and i can have them flat ground for you so you can have your own preferred sharpening cut put on them...

chest pad origingally cost$400 sell for 100
skates were $450 new sell for $250
both together for $300
Response:

Cardigan Mtn Skate

BY: Z-Skate
Oct 2nd, 2009 @ 12:01PM


In just let me know.
Response:

Never turn down a skate huh?

BY: kpark
Oct 4th, 2009 @ 4:49PM


Jay, do you ever turn down a skate? Not that I blame you! I wish I could make this one
Response:

J-Roc-Pro-Goal

BY: rgrunds
Oct 2nd, 2009 @ 1:06PM


JC

I played in Burlington this morning. After signing a contract and the media conference, I stopped in at Play it Again. They had a special on protectors. They were new for 1/4 the price.

Sorry. Didn't mean to give you a run-around.

ES
Response:

I am in

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 2nd, 2009 @ 3:01PM


Most Sundays I can 4 sure make it. Aren't you skating on Sundays already? Either with Obar or the North Stars? Besides, If J-Z is in we should CRUSH the CMS boys...who's gonna play in net?
Response:

BY: ghadley
Oct 2nd, 2009 @ 3:47PM


iam in for either goal or ref or both now there would be something fun to watch especially if I was fillig my trap with wings and blu from the cardigan chef's
Response:

next time

BY: goaliem31
Oct 3rd, 2009 @ 7:50AM


dude... next time you want to know what i have for gear... don't bother asking... the stuff you could have got from me would have been 10x better the the crap you bought... next time... don't waist my time!!!
Response:

next time

BY: goaliem31
Oct 3rd, 2009 @ 7:51AM


not to mention its the second or third time you have waisted my time asking me what i have for stuff and then doing something else...
Response:

One

BY: rgrunds
Oct 3rd, 2009 @ 8:16AM


Down boi.
Response:

Two/Use your head

BY: rgrunds
Oct 3rd, 2009 @ 8:20AM


They had $400.00 equipment for sale at $89.00.

You are asking too much. Check ebay and craiglist. Plus, your protector needed sewing.

Use your head. I gave you an opportunity to make a market offer. You didn't check competitive prices and are WAY off, even for quality items.

PLUS, someone posted a problem with you on a prior transaction. It's on the web. I hope it was resolved in your favor.


Response:

THREE

BY: rgrunds
Oct 3rd, 2009 @ 8:21AM


your prices weren't even close to the used market for quality equipment.

Learn The Market. You'll sell more.
Response:

even MORE NEW FEATURES

BY: kpark
Oct 3rd, 2009 @ 1:07PM


They are coming, soon. In the newest version of UVHL.com, set to launch this week.

KP
Response:

SWEEEEET!!!

BY: kpark
Oct 3rd, 2009 @ 1:13PM


This is a test for the new website. This should actually attach to a RESPONSE to a thread.

We'll see if it works, eh.

KP
Response:

Another Test

BY: kpark
Oct 4th, 2009 @ 4:52PM


Just testing the response to to a specific response. Looks pretty sweet.
Response:

Let me pitch

BY: rgrunds
Oct 4th, 2009 @ 7:17PM


I could do it.....


Response:

grunds...

BY: goaliem31
Oct 5th, 2009 @ 12:30PM


first of all that poor report was from someone that had no right post what he did cause nothing was wrong with the gear and he was completely taken care of since i took money off and sent it back to him... so fuck you for believing the internet!!
secondly... if your going to look around... look around before you start asking people that you know in the league and wasting their time going through their gear for you!!

not to mention i know the market when it comes to my own gear and the shape that it is in!!!
Response:

This is getting INTENSE!

BY: kpark
Oct 5th, 2009 @ 12:36PM


I love the fact that I'm not the only angry person online. Keep at it, this is starting to get really GOOD. Let me fan the fire....

Grundy, you are old and short.
Condon, you smell like astroglide & have a giant 5-hole.
Response:

Good

BY: rgrunds
Oct 5th, 2009 @ 12:35PM


now just end it.

If you had better prices I would have bought from you.

I got an Eagle Monster Pro for under $100.00 New. They cost $450.00 new.
I got Koho 460s for $50.00. In great shape.

We're done.
Response:

Oh Kelly

BY: rgrunds
Oct 5th, 2009 @ 12:40PM


sometimes I could stick my meat Right in your ear.

Unfortunately, you are paying for that service already.


Response:

PARK backwards

BY: rgrunds
Oct 5th, 2009 @ 12:41PM


spellls KRAP

turn off your vibrating egg...it is distracting your judgment...

I am young and fresh....
Response:

It's true....KRAP

BY: kpark
Oct 5th, 2009 @ 12:49PM


Not to mention my first name backwards is kinda like I LICK....

YLLEK KRAP.

Regardless of how much I like crap, you are a decrepit old man who needs an afternoon nap & more fiber.

KP
Response:

creak creak creak.......

BY: rgrunds
Oct 5th, 2009 @ 12:54PM


where da white women wif fiber at....?
Response:

PSYCHED FOR THE SEASON!!!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 5th, 2009 @ 2:13PM


I for one am really excited about this upcoming season. The Nords are looking good in pre-season. Well, at least the ones that are showing up. All of the new faces to the league will no doubt bring some help to struggling teams, and a new squad, basically made up of has-beens, local goons, and A goaltender with the most internet hits (www.waghip.com) since the singing baby. Hits that most likely ended up in an F.B.I investigation. With the Gamblers in trouble, as far as numbers go, they will be hard-pressed to repeat as UVHL Champs. Who will step up and emerge victorious in the vicious and uber-competitive UVHL!!!
Response:

hey Park

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 6th, 2009 @ 9:19AM


Where's the new website? I thought you were almost ready to launch?
Response:

ugh

BY: kpark
Oct 6th, 2009 @ 9:22AM


Almost ready. Between working full time, chasing down money, getting shit in order for the upcoming season, chasing 2 toddlers around, freelancing, finding time to sleep, finding time to release some stress....the site is almost there. I promise, I don't want to partially launch with missing pages and shit.

Stay tuned.
Response:

New Feature List:

BY: kpark
Oct 7th, 2009 @ 11:21AM


So these are some of the new features.....among many others:

1. Referees & Ref Schedules
2. Rate your Refs
3. Pick 'em - This will allow you to pick a winner before each game. Tally each player's wins & losses
4. Forum - Reply to a response. This will highlight which response you are replying to.
5. League & Team Sponsors
6. Newly designed Team Pages
7. Newly designed Player Pages
8. Share This: Post your profile to Facebook, Digg, Twitter, etc.
9. Flickr - photos courtesy of GarrenTee Phototgraphy will be added & tagged to each team & player.

Any other thoughts on what would be a nice addition to the new site? I'm hoping for a launch tomorrow: 10/8/2009.

KP

Response:

chasing toddlers is illegal

BY: rgrunds
Oct 6th, 2009 @ 12:30PM


Now you put that thing away buddy, and think pure thoughts...
Response:

Wow...

BY: hkydoc
Oct 6th, 2009 @ 8:10PM


...and I thought the Ashley Judd pic was hot! Look at the legs on that chick, Park!
Response:

YAAAHHH!

BY: hkydoc
Oct 6th, 2009 @ 8:12PM


I fucking love it! I LOVE HOCKEY! The first week of the season is always one of the best weeks of the entire year. Just think...ice, hockey, beer, wings and bleu cheese! What a great combination!

See you on the ice!

McD
Response:

Park's girl toy

BY: rgrunds
Oct 7th, 2009 @ 7:55AM


looks like Popeye
Response:

Grundy......

BY: kpark
Oct 7th, 2009 @ 8:00AM


Grundy, you are an odd little man. Half the time I don't know what you are talking about....the other half I just pretend.

Although, I did love how fired up you got Condon! That was priceless.

KP
Response:

I'm Tall

BY: rgrunds
Oct 7th, 2009 @ 8:05AM


I'm not little. I'm tall.

I'm not odd....I am....um...normal....I am a completely normal....Hawaiian. Yeah.

Popeye. Remember...he has disporportionately large calves and forearms.

And remember, never EVER suck the hairy wazoo.

I regret mentioning Condon's prior sale dispute. I lost my temper. Didn't need to bring it up on the site. One never knows who is at fault. I don't want to damage his reputation unfairly.

He was incompetent about his prices, though. Know Your Market...

ES
Response:

BY: ghadley
Oct 7th, 2009 @ 1:00PM


What about adding calling/emailinng into the standard and valley news with our schedule and standings. Plus mtn times and how about the local cable company to film us..... and take your head out of your ass!
Response:

BY: ghadley
Oct 7th, 2009 @ 1:02PM


and lets make sure to add Bentley's to the advertisig for $3.00 draft beer from long trail and buy one get one on wings and blue cheese.........
Response:

I CAN'T WAIT!

BY: kpark
Oct 7th, 2009 @ 9:31PM


A revamped Whalers squad will make this ONE HELL OF A GAME. Season 7 is about to begin!

BRING IT ON!
Response:

UVHL refs ..

BY: Z-Skate
Oct 8th, 2009 @ 9:57AM


Ladies - what are the stipulations on being a ref in the "U" ..
Response:

Bad Spelling

BY: rgrunds
Oct 8th, 2009 @ 10:02AM


You may not have ANY spelling skills.

None.

See G. Hadley for uncompromising adherence to this standard.
Response:

BY: ghadley
Oct 8th, 2009 @ 11:54AM


Hey Dirty Grundy Lick the back of my cup !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Response:

I've had better offers

BY: rgrunds
Oct 8th, 2009 @ 11:58AM


from better looking girls.

But, thanks.
Response:

ref clinics

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 8th, 2009 @ 7:06PM


I think there's a ref clinic coming up in Oct. 17 or something...ask McD on Sunday night, he'll know. And Grundy..you are a real piece of work. Not sure where your mind is, definitely not from this planet. One things for sure.....you lick the back of Hadley's cup, and the disease you WILL get, hasn't even had a name to it yet!
Response:

Marshy, What did I tell you

BY: rgrunds
Oct 9th, 2009 @ 2:03PM


Did I say you could speak or post?

Now...you must be punished....

Do you want a noogie or an Indian sunburn?

Kelly has his own punishment against you. No spanking before oral activites...
Response:

activities

BY: rgrunds
Oct 9th, 2009 @ 2:04PM


EEEEEEk.

mispelling...


Response:

UVHL Runner-Up Award

BY: rgrunds
Oct 10th, 2009 @ 5:48AM


Hadley's Cup

...for those who don't get the Whalen....


"We toasted from the back of Hadley's cup"
Response:

BY: ghadley
Oct 15th, 2009 @ 5:51PM


hey you little turd burger, if we thought you could have even come close to winning a game in the uvhl we would have had you skate in our league again but the night I reffed you holy shit I thought you might have been blind so I didnt really want to say much, now I know you just plain ol suck!!!!!! you might want to consider a old fuck goalie school, tim thomas has one at UVM Ill get you on the list next summer.....
Response:

That's Hostile

BY: rgrunds
Oct 15th, 2009 @ 6:24PM


tsk tsk. You stop that! Who taught you those words?

I'll get another chance there. I like the UVHL.

Will you pay for the Thomas camp? Wow, thanks.

ES


Response:

Hey Grundy

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 11th, 2009 @ 1:56PM


you toasted WHAT from the back of Hadley's cup? Because the performance you put up playing for us, was nothing to celebrate! Show us you can stand on your head in net, then maybe you'll get some props!
Response:

Marshy you dildo lapper

BY: rgrunds
Oct 11th, 2009 @ 4:19PM


OW.

You'll pay......


Response:

NEW SITE!

BY: kpark
Oct 11th, 2009 @ 5:56PM


It is finally here! Tell me what you think, and tell me if you find any bugs!

KP
Response:

BY: goaliem31
Oct 12th, 2009 @ 6:28PM


i think there might be a bug with the changing your picture option in the MY UVHL section... just thought i would let you know
Response:

more info.

BY: kpark
Oct 12th, 2009 @ 6:34PM


Hey, what's the bug? Give me more information about the bug so that I can get it fixed.

Thanks for the heads up. I'm looking into it now.

KP
Response:

croping

BY: goaliem31
Oct 13th, 2009 @ 12:26PM


you were able to crop pic on the old site... plus when you upload a pic on the new set up it doesn't have a save option to save changes
Response:

Kelly/Possible Sponsor

BY: rgrunds
Oct 12th, 2009 @ 6:45AM


I played with a guy name Howard Levine. He is a VERY good financial consultant and is interested in sponsoring the Nordiques. (You said you needed a sponsor, right?)
At any rate, if he calls, he is legitimate and you should talk to him about financial markets and the national/global economy. He is a no-bullshit guy and won\'t lie to make money. Not your standard irresponsible broker-salesman.

He may not be interested in your anal beads and love harness, so, hold off on those.

He\'d be a good sponsor and at least, a good financial planner for any of the ice cretins who are interested.

ES

Anyway,
Response:

Thanks

BY: kpark
Oct 12th, 2009 @ 8:35AM


Hey Grundy, I just talked with Howard. Seems like a good guy. We're looking into some options to make it worthwhile to both sides.

Thanks again for thinking of the UVHL and passing along some leads.

KP
Response:

I can't wait to ref this one!

BY: kpark
Oct 12th, 2009 @ 5:13PM


This should be a good one to don the stripes for. It'll be great to get back into reffing with these two fast pace teams. Minus that dirty bastard, Poirier.

KP
Response:

Bring it...

BY: Garrentee
Oct 12th, 2009 @ 5:49PM


You dont say anything about dirty when McD is spanking your ass from behind.
Response:

Because I like it!

BY: kpark
Oct 12th, 2009 @ 6:18PM


...not to mention that McD is very gentle, and uses blue cheese as a buffer!

KP
Response:

glad to see

BY: goaliem31
Oct 12th, 2009 @ 6:22PM


well i am glad to see something haven't changed with the pregame reports!! LMFAO
new site... new layout... same pregame writters!!! LOL!!
looking forward to getting the season started though boys!!! see ya at the rink!!!
Response:

Bleu Cheese is multi-purpose!

BY: hkydoc
Oct 12th, 2009 @ 7:17PM


Nice to see Garren knows the many benefits of Bleu Cheese! It is also good for athletes foot, genital warts, and anal fistulas. Garren, is yours healing up okay? Bleu cheese directly from France is the best for that one as they can be particularly foul smelling and full of pus.

See you on the ice! Keep your stick to yourself!
Response:

Ahh, the Bleu!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 13th, 2009 @ 6:32AM


That is fucking sick McD...As being one of the regular "writters" as J-Roc Jerod Condon put it, I'll agree to say that this game will likely be a good one. Not sure WHAT will happen, as at least a bunch of guys will no doubt have to get a few skates under their belt to shake off the rust. I for one have played like 6-7 times, and I still have a lot to do. I AM impressed with the turnout we've had in pre-season. A lot of the "Core" Nordiques, as well as the newcomers have made it out regularly. Nice job on the website Kelly, looks great! GO NORDS GO!!!!
Response:

Ahh, the Bleu!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 13th, 2009 @ 6:32AM


That is fucking sick McD...As being one of the regular "writters" as J-Roc Jerod Condon put it, I'll agree to say that this game will likely be a good one. Not sure WHAT will happen, as at least a bunch of guys will no doubt have to get a few skates under their belt to shake off the rust. I for one have played like 6-7 times, and I still have a lot to do. I AM impressed with the turnout we've had in pre-season. A lot of the "Core" Nordiques, as well as the newcomers have made it out regularly. Nice job on the website Kelly, looks great! GO NORDS GO!!!!
Response:

What ..

BY: Z-Skate
Oct 13th, 2009 @ 6:34AM


Nordiques by 2 .. When did Park become a comedian?
Response:

No Shit!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 13th, 2009 @ 6:40AM


Maybe the Nords by 2...only if your "basement move" works at least once on Kenny there Park! Oh, and a little birdie tells me that you should keep your head up...at least in the first period
Response:

BY: habman
Oct 13th, 2009 @ 7:05AM


Nords get the win because JT is between the pipes. Eat your Wheaties tonight JT!
Response:

There you go Coatesy!

BY: kpark
Oct 13th, 2009 @ 12:11PM


That's what I like to hear. Here we go NORDS!
Response:

Looking for a ref!

BY: kpark
Oct 13th, 2009 @ 7:40AM


Hey guys, we are down a ref for the late game tonight. Looking to see if anyone playing in this game would throw on some stripes with Hadley for the 9:20pm game.

KP
Response:

Need a ref.

BY: kpark
Oct 13th, 2009 @ 7:41AM


Hey guys, we are down a ref for the late game tonight. Looking to see if anyone playing in this game would throw on some stripes with Hadley for the 9:20pm game. It pays $35.

KP
Response:

if you

BY: goaliem31
Oct 13th, 2009 @ 11:11AM


iy you don't have anyone to ref with hadley yet... i can stick around and do it!!
Response:

Cool

BY: kpark
Oct 13th, 2009 @ 11:13AM


I think Garren said he'd do it, but if he bags out. You are in.

KP
Response:

Pick \'em

BY: kpark
Oct 13th, 2009 @ 11:24AM


Hey guys, I have just added in a PICK \'EM feature into each game page. This lets you pick who you think with win the game. It should be fun, it will track your picks all year long and maybe we\'ll give a prize out to the person that gets the highest percentage of picks correct.

I\'m looking for a sponsor for this feature. I\'ll actually build out a page to track your picks versus the other players.

KP
Response:

haha

BY: Z-Skate
Oct 13th, 2009 @ 12:21PM


JT will be too busy pulling the splinters out of his ass from his time w/ the Jackals to actually stop the puck .. Do you have a back-up?
Response:

Listen Up NEW GUY!!!

BY: kpark
Oct 13th, 2009 @ 12:32PM


Jay, you are CRAZY! You should focus on getting turned inside out instead of running your mouth on the forum! I still owe you a cross check in the ribs from Sunday night.....well.....I guess I deserved that one!

Bring your "A" game tonight ZEEEEEEEEE. You're gonna need it after I turn Kenny inside-out, then backside-in with my newest basement-tested move. It is called. "Le Lallier Cry Like A Baby". It's gonna be SWEEET!

KP
Response:

I'll feel NO shame...

BY: hkydoc
Oct 13th, 2009 @ 1:16PM


...when I take the 2 minutes for bodychecking tonight, Z-man!

McD
Response:

Now, now ..

BY: Z-Skate
Oct 13th, 2009 @ 2:31PM


Mr.Park, I will be sure to sharpen the butt end just for you and the corners.

And McD save your energy .. You will need it while trying to chase me around. lol
Response:

this is fun ..

BY: Z-Skate
Oct 13th, 2009 @ 2:32PM



Response:

this is fun ..

BY: Z-Skate
Oct 13th, 2009 @ 2:32PM



Response:

WOW! 75% of the league?

BY: kpark
Oct 13th, 2009 @ 2:34PM


I just added the LEAGUE PICKS slider bar on the game pages. And right now it says that 75% or 3 out of 4 guys think that the Whalers are going to win this one.

BALLSY! REALLY BALLSY! You all have got that pick wrong.
Response:

the slider ..

BY: Z-Skate
Oct 13th, 2009 @ 2:42PM


It's so you can than rant all week long about the upset .. haha
Keep ur head up sweetie..
Response:

NO NUDGES ON WEDNESDAYS, FUCKERS!

BY: hkydoc
Oct 14th, 2009 @ 4:29PM


Are you guys fucking serious? I received 11 \"UVHL NUDGES\" today to do the game write-ups. I\'m crackin\' backs all day in Randolph on Wednesdays, so if you think I can get to it before Thursday dream on! If I don\'t have it posted by Saturday then feel free to blast my inbox with nudges, but the Doc has to pay the bills with his real job on Mon, Wed, and Fri, so take it easy, I can\'t handle the stress!

See you on the ice!

McD
Response:

BOO HOO

BY: kpark
Oct 14th, 2009 @ 5:17PM


WHAHHHHHHH. Are you done crying? Git 'er done buddy! Cut down your phone sex on Wednesday nights from 7 hours to 2 hours and you'll have plenty of time.

You gotta pay the bills? You work 3 hours a week!

KP
Response:

Yeah, but...

BY: hkydoc
Oct 15th, 2009 @ 3:46PM


...I've got 'em on all 4 north american time zones, hawaii, and europe, so my time is limited! Plus, the 3 hours I work is VERY taxing and draining. I need regular naps just so I don't walk around in a fog all day (I save that for when I ref...).

McD
Response:

It's wednesday

BY: rgrunds
Oct 14th, 2009 @ 7:36PM


Where are the write ups? Whalers look strong with the new goalie.


Response:

New Goalie???

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 14th, 2009 @ 8:56PM


The Whale had none other than Kenny"LaLaLaLaLaLabamba"Lallier between the pipes. Speaking of pipes, what ARE you smokin Grundy?
Response:

for once, you're right

BY: rgrunds
Oct 14th, 2009 @ 9:12PM


I meant Tuck. Why don't they just get Brodeur...

BUT, Lallier's defense could help him a bit more. When I watched last year, they didn't watch his open side or anticipate passes to the slot. He does his job by playing the puck. Needs his defense to control the pass and watch his rear. I guess that's Kelly's job...

for once you're right....enjoy it...every oversize Ice Predator gets their day...you get a forum moment.


Response:

Who censored Fuckers?

BY: rgrunds
Oct 15th, 2009 @ 8:18PM


Gee kinda antiseptic here...

Getting so a guy can't even say "fuck" with his mouth full anymore...

....please pass the bleu..


Response:

BY: SK8VT
Oct 16th, 2009 @ 2:22PM


Man McD i am going to Nudge the shit out of you from now on
Response:

Idea/writeups

BY: rgrunds
Oct 17th, 2009 @ 7:02AM


Dr. Hackenfleisch,

I have big idea. I want to show some sport writing to a couple editors. Most of my stuff is in different subject matters and I want to expand.

One week, could I do the write-ups? I'd give 'em to you to check for accuracy and editing since you know the players better, but maybe this would work. Maybe this would work for you and all the ice cretins.

Think of this, ALL the virulent hostility normally intended for you would be re-directed towards me...that must have SOME entertainment value...

ES


Response:

Wings are on us!

BY: hkydoc
Oct 17th, 2009 @ 2:48PM


Grundy:

If you'd like to attend the night and do the write-ups as a guest reporter, then we'd be sure to buy your wings post-game @ Bentley's! But, do you think you can handle it? The stress of having Kelly Park hassle you starting at 7 AM on Wednesday mornings to get it done because you are a lazy bastard? The added stress of Kelly's newest form of torture: UVHL Nudges piling up in your inbox? The knowledge that there are fans and former players nationwide reading every word that you type just waiting to send a nasty Forum thread your way? If you think you can tackle the stress and endure the pressure, then bring it on! See you in the scorekeeper's box on Tuesday!

McD
Response:

No reason to be concerned

BY: rgrunds
Oct 17th, 2009 @ 8:26PM


What heat? Just a couple guys with gland problems and overstimulated anger centers...? I can hardly wait..

"It was disorienting to watch Nords defenseman Kelly Park skate towards the point like an expecting Guinea Fowl. Although he reminds the writer of pregnant poultry on ice, he managed to cover the slot and his corner as needed."

Between Condon and Mr. Hadley, I might have a couple death threats, but, what the fuck. It's not easy being me...the tavel, the excitment....the danger.

Actually, this might be the year of the goalie for you guys. Condon, JT, Hadley, the guy from Dartmouth...fukkin A..some real good ones.

ES
Response:

loving the nudges

BY: kpark
Oct 17th, 2009 @ 4:49PM


I have to admit.....I LOVE THE NEW NUDGE FEATURE. I chuckle every time I nudge you McD.

KP
Response:

Just you wait, Park!

BY: hkydoc
Oct 18th, 2009 @ 11:18AM


Soon it will be YOUR turn to be on the receiving end of the NUDGES, Park! So get your laughs in now, fucker! Mu ha ha, mu ha ha, mu ha ha!

McD
Response:

Shoulda been a hook!

BY: hkydoc
Oct 14th, 2009 @ 4:32PM


Park should have been nailed for a "major league hook" on Liam Oliver's breakaway in the 3rd period. Otherwise, great game reffed by Hadley and rookie Garren "Mr. Hook" Poirier, and great effort by the younger, faster Whalers. They are only going to get better as the season goes on.

McD
Response:

Early line

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 14th, 2009 @ 9:09PM


Vegas has the Nords winning this one by 2...Total "Frenchy-Style" meltdown by J-Rod Condon...and Mighty Will Meyer will blow a tierod, ending his run as Mighty Mouse. GO NORDS
Response:

Pick \'Em

BY: kpark
Oct 19th, 2009 @ 2:05PM


We\'re looking to add a PRIZE for the Pick \'Em champion at the end of the season, maybe a stick or gift certificate to State line Sports, any ideas.

So, don\'t forget to make your picks before tomorrow night!! I created an initial page for the Pick \'Em challenge. Right now it will show you the league average...which is below 50% and the leaders.

You can get to that page by clicking on the link for PICK \'EM at the bottom of every page, or clicking on the Pick \'EM Gauge on each game page.

KP
Response:

Damn Gamblers!

BY: kpark
Oct 21st, 2009 @ 9:05AM


Awesome game last night from the Gamblers! We, the Nords, got out to a quick start and blew our wad and the Gamblers just continued to pour it on!

The game winning goal was a heartbreaker, but it was one of those beautiful plays that leaves you in awe. Ammel finding Marrazzo from behind the net in the high slot, let a NASTY snapper go up over the shoulder of Turner under the crossbar.

Solid game guys, but we'll get you next time!

KP
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Oct 22nd, 2009 @ 6:53AM


I hope there is a mercy rule cause ur getting lit up Hads in this one..8 goals im calling it
Response:

HA!

BY: kpark
Oct 22nd, 2009 @ 8:56AM


Jordy, unfortunately I think Hadley was scared to play us, and scheduled to get his knee scoped yesterday. Kind of interesting he chose to do that right before he plays the NORDS!

The Nords are going to bounce back after looking lethargic last week.

KP
Response:

BY: ghadley
Oct 27th, 2009 @ 12:13PM


first of all no way will you score eight goals tonight and one way park ave I hope you have been practicing shooting on that kid of your cause i havent seen one shot come off your stick this year with any kind of speed or accuracy
Response:

huh?

BY: kpark
Oct 27th, 2009 @ 1:18PM


Hadley....was that even English...or was it Engrish? Maybe some old man slang in there? Regardless, I have no idea what you are talking about. I hope you're on the bench tonight so I can fire a puck at your ugly mug.
Response:

15 New Photos Added

BY: kpark
Oct 23rd, 2009 @ 11:05AM


Hey guys, Thanks to the Brewer\'s Garren Poirier, we are going to have photos being added to the site all season long. I\'m adding them into Flickr & then tagging them with players names & team names so that they will show up appropriately on each player\'s profile page & each team page.

Make sure to thank Garren & visit his site Garrentee Photography.

Today I added in 15 new photos from week 1. In the future I\'ll try to get them up faster. I may also add them to the Game Recaps in the future which would be pretty sweet. Check out the photos and if you notice that you or someone else is incorrectly tagged in a photo, shoot me an email.

KP
Response:

I WANT PICS OF ME!

BY: hkydoc
Oct 25th, 2009 @ 9:08PM


HEY! What about me? Am I not sexy enough to make the cut?

McD
Response:

McD wants a personal ad...

BY: rgrunds
Oct 26th, 2009 @ 6:16AM


O.K

"Hi, my name's McDarla. I'm a physical therapist in the Hanover area and enjoy hiking, horseback riding and talking with friends. Hope you like my picture. Maybe you can ride ME some day."
Response:

Dear McDarla:

BY: hkydoc
Oct 27th, 2009 @ 9:25AM


Thank you for your pic and your note, but she-males aren't really my thing...not that there is anything wrong with that. Good luck in your search!

McD

P.S. I'm sure of you hang around the rink on Tuesdays long enough you'll eventually find what you're looking for. There are a lot of gender-confused UVHLers out there, mostly on the Oilers...

P.P.S. If you have a Blue Cheese fettish then I might reconsider your offer...
Response:

Lost!

BY: kpark
Oct 27th, 2009 @ 9:49AM


I just don't even know where to start with the Grundonator. You are an odd odd odd odd duck.
Response:

DONE!

BY: kpark
Oct 28th, 2009 @ 10:49AM


McDiesel, I finally added a photo of you. Go to your player page and your photos are at the bottom. Here's the link http://uvhl.com/player.php?playerID=20

KP
Response:

Marrazzo for POW

BY: hkydoc
Oct 23rd, 2009 @ 7:18PM


SICK, SICK goal! That play alone gets him POW in my book. The MMA line was lethal, and was the difference yet again in a Gamblers win. We shoulda had you on the PP chances we had, but we sucked. Congrats on a great win, Gamblers.

McD

P.S. Oh yeah...I SCORED!!! (but I'd trade it all for a win)
Response:

Turduckens?

BY: kpark
Oct 27th, 2009 @ 1:17PM


I just love that word.
Response:

Goalie Report

BY: habman
Oct 27th, 2009 @ 1:24PM


Hads is out... Lallier is in.
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Oct 28th, 2009 @ 7:37AM


Fuckin A hads i needed to read that 3 times just to understand it
Response:

Whalers out of the closet!

BY: hkydoc
Oct 27th, 2009 @ 3:03PM


Kenny is bringing out the subs for tonight's game against the Gamblers, so this should be a good one!

McD
Response:

Nobody knows what it means!

BY: hkydoc
Oct 27th, 2009 @ 3:04PM


Huh?

McD
Response:

It means DELICIOUS

BY: McG
Oct 27th, 2009 @ 3:24PM


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Turducken
Response:

Dr Doom is back...

BY: Garrentee
Oct 27th, 2009 @ 3:27PM


Mr Joe Lyle is back in the hot seat tonight!! He might just throw a trash can or two on the ice...
Response:

Hell of a game!

BY: kpark
Oct 28th, 2009 @ 11:50AM


That was a blast last night. A good high tempo, high scoring game. Lots of mistakes from both teams and tons of turnovers.

KP
Response:

Guest writer \"rgrunds\" for write-ups. So...whaddya think?

BY: hkydoc
Oct 29th, 2009 @ 8:55AM


Bob Grundstein graciously gave up a precious night away from a MENSA conference call and some barnyard porn saved on DVR to observe and report on our week 3 display of so-called hockey on Tuesday 10/27. He had several interesting insights, many hilarious comments, multiple disturbing perspectives and parallels, so tell him what you think! Constructive criticism is always welcome, ball busting is even more cherished.

Thanks, Grundy! Great job, eh!

McD
Response:

I DIDN'T give up porn...

BY: rgrunds
Oct 29th, 2009 @ 9:00AM


There was a little dark corner in the scorekeeper's box. I hope the custodian remembers to clean under the counter....
Response:

ahhh Grundy

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 30th, 2009 @ 10:41AM


I will give you this...your write-ups WERE in fact hilarious. I liked the part about Liam Oliver being an Irish Primate, now that was funny, and weighing in less than your average household pet...classic. I laughed out loud when you said that Condon need not worry, no spelling needed..HAHA Kind of a touchy subject with him I think. Nice job though...back again next week?
Response:

and..

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 30th, 2009 @ 10:42AM


You are still one sick FUCK! Keep yer shit in yer pants. No one wants to see those OLD BALLS!
Response:

So you looked intelligent in ONE game

BY: rgrunds
Oct 30th, 2009 @ 11:30AM


don't get too confident. Jewboy might see things different next time....


Response:

Intelligent?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 30th, 2009 @ 1:57PM


Wow! Thanks Grundy...I thought I looked like a pile of crap at least the 2nd and 3rd periods. And just a little food for thought, If I only had one good game so far this season, it was likely the first one. Hopefully it won't be the only great game this year. And "Jewboy" as you call yourself...if you make it to every game, you'll for sure see that this isn't the case every game. If you can re-schedule your NAMBLA meetings to later in the week, we can have a regular "reporter" at our games. I know your Man-Boy love Adventure Club comes first, but think of the WHOLE picture here Grundy, we need an impartial scribe to tell the world how it is. Don't let us down...Now fuck off, I have work to do
Response:

Your Work.....?

BY: rgrunds
Oct 30th, 2009 @ 3:17PM


is What? Keeping your saliva in your head? Don't drool on your keyboard big boy.

As I told Kelly, individual players can't do well unless the team is coordinated. Get A Bench Coach. DR had one and they adjusted over the course of the game. The Nords (Nurds) should be playing much better hockey and would be if someone you trusted was coaching. Right now, everyone is neglecting the neutral zone on their way towards the blue line.

As far as coming every week, the drive is about two hours RT, the games take 5 hours and the writing takes another 4 hours. That's a lot of time.
Response:

Marshy, there's a party in your mouth

BY: rgrunds
Oct 30th, 2009 @ 3:18PM


Everybody's coming.

ta ta

ES
Response:

OMG

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 30th, 2009 @ 5:26PM


Grundy, your insight to our team is interesting. In fact, after only one game, you've already decided that we need a coach. Well, this is men's league. And the only reason DR had a bench boss was because Hadley is the COACH, GOALIE and team shower whore. No other team has a coach. Maybe your lack of icetime in a men's league somehow has clouded your memory. I understand your dilemma about the time needed to put in to cover the "U", but don't ask to cover the games unless you're willing to make time. Maybe if you didn't give up like 13 goals your last time out, you might get a chance to play. OUCH, that was harsh.
And Grundy, the party has always been in your mouth...only no one WANTS to come...Must be the gift that keeps on giving...
Response:

No, no Barfie

BY: rgrunds
Oct 30th, 2009 @ 6:22PM


That was seven goals on at least 43 shots. FIVE breakaways stopped by sterling ME and one of the goals was tipped in by a Nords defenseman.

Statistically, just slightly above average for your league. I should have stopped two, the others were legit. Should have lost 4-3.

Details, details.

Back to your lube tube, marshy...
Response:

classic

BY: vtdownhiller
Oct 30th, 2009 @ 5:40AM


When you weigh less than most household pets, you really should control your aggressive behavior


Dude...funniest line ever...yet so true
Response:

UVHA Pee Wee 2 team in need of coach (games only)

BY: McG
Oct 30th, 2009 @ 12:48PM


Men-

A co-worker asked me to put the word out that the Upper Valley Hockey Association is in need of a coach for its Pee Wee 2 team. Apparently the Pee Wee 1 coaches are willing to run practices during the week if no other arrangements can be made, but are unavailable to bench coach the games on weekends.

If anyone is interested or wants to learn more, shoot me an email at rymcgovern@gmail.com and I can put you in touch with the right people.

-McG
Response:

Wish I could help

BY: kpark
Nov 1st, 2009 @ 8:40AM


Hey bud, I wish I was able to help out. Do you know if the coach needs to be registered as a coach through USA Hockey? Or does the player registration cover both?

Anyways, I'll pass along this info to anyone that would make a good fit.

KP
Response:

BY: McG
Nov 2nd, 2009 @ 12:19PM


Yeah, the coach needs to be registered through USAH. League will pay for all costs.
Response:

Marshy-Write Ups

BY: rgrunds
Oct 31st, 2009 @ 6:15AM


Hey Pilie,

why don\'t you do them one week? You write. I am sure everyone would want to know what you think.

You should try it.

P.S. I just shot your truck.
ES
Response:

how 'bout you re-think that

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 31st, 2009 @ 10:38AM


Grundy, first things first...There's no way at least ONE guy from our team would agree that only 4 of those goals were your fault. I'm not gonna sit here and have some pissing contest as to who did what or who should have done different. All I know is, I haven't missed barely any games in the "U". But if for some cosmic re-alignment reason you are asked to play for our team, I don't think I can bear to watch...so I'll sit that one out. As for the write-ups, I DID do them a long time ago, they were short and sweet..and LATE. I guess I took too long to get them in. Not really my cup of tea. So, Grundy do us all a favor and continue the coverage if you can make it, MARSHY
Response:

You are right

BY: rgrunds
Oct 31st, 2009 @ 11:46AM


They wouldn't agree 4 of those goals were my fault. Only two. You are right.

Now, do the write ups for next week. I wanna see.
Response:

Are you serious?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 31st, 2009 @ 12:51PM


Grundster...you must be smokin some of that sweet Canadian Chronic, because I think that the Gamblers scored 12 or 13 goals that game....are you saying only two were your fault? Whatever...I think I JUST said that the write-ups were NOT my cup of tea. I actually thanked you for taking the time, and you STILL call me out. Are you high or what? And what is this "Mindless Groupie" thing anyway?
Response:

tsk tsk

BY: rgrunds
Nov 3rd, 2009 @ 7:33AM


I played against Tuck. 7-3 loss. (sigh) 43 SOG

I'm a mindless groupie for Yacey. McD didn't manage to get the entire text on the web. "I was a mindless groupie. I lived on cheese corn and diet soda during the Yacey tour."

I'm really sorry about your truck.
Response:

tsk yourself

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 3rd, 2009 @ 2:17PM


I'm done with you Grundy. Your "mindless" blips make no f-ing sense at all.
Response:

People are getting so worked up

BY: rgrunds
Nov 3rd, 2009 @ 4:55PM


So sensitive.
Response:

Great Goaltending this Year

BY: rgrunds
Nov 1st, 2009 @ 4:36PM


Don\'t waste those pefectly good white people.

They fine.
Response:

Agreed

BY: hkydoc
Nov 1st, 2009 @ 9:30PM


You are right on with your analysis, Grundy! Yacey, Condon, Turner and Crowson are all solid and off to great starts this season.

McD
Response:

what?

BY: kpark
Nov 2nd, 2009 @ 7:56AM


What the hell are you talking about? White People? I'm just confused. Was that a racist comment, a joke, a movie quote?


Response:

'dose goalie mans

BY: rgrunds
Nov 2nd, 2009 @ 9:13AM


dey be white. It's a shame to waste perfectly good white people.
Response:

Yeah, I'm a bigot

BY: rgrunds
Nov 2nd, 2009 @ 10:59AM


I hate white people.

And your representation of Hkydoc discriminates against immense, fat freaks.

Very insensitive.

I'll have to work with you on sparing people's feelings.
Or maybe you could just ask Hadley for some advice. He is very empathic.
ES
Response:

100% voting for Dead River win?!?!?

BY: kpark
Nov 2nd, 2009 @ 12:56PM


Are there no Whalers voting here? 4 out of 4 predict a Whaler's loss. Ouch.
Response:

OOOOOO YEAH!

BY: kpark
Nov 2nd, 2009 @ 1:00PM


The Commish says Tuckies by 2 goals. I think I'm going with the Gamblers though, but it will be a game time decision who I choose in the Pick 'Em.

Two undefeated teams.....only one will remain.
Response:

PATHETIC!

BY: kpark
Nov 5th, 2009 @ 8:52AM


I suck. Great team game by the Brewers and as much as it KILLS me to say it....Petey Bartline was solid. But he's still a virgin!

KP
Response:

The world as I know it is in CHAOS!

BY: kpark
Nov 5th, 2009 @ 8:56AM


First the Nordiques get shutout by the Brewers. Then the Whalers drop Dead River, limiting them to only 2 goals.

But you gotta love having 6 competitive teams.

KP
Response:

I concur

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 5th, 2009 @ 1:47PM


Having six competitive teams makes it fun for everyone. As shocked as I am that the Whale beat DR, their intensity does not surprise me. They have always skated hard as a team. I never expected the Brew Crew to upset the World -Class Nordiques, but they did! Petey B so I hear was STELLAR! Looks like the Nords will have some fire under them next week!
Response:

I got them all wrong...

BY: hkydoc
Nov 5th, 2009 @ 9:12PM


I was 0 for 3 on Tuesday's games, but that doesn't mean I'm not impressed with the outcomes or the league thus far this season. Six competitive teams is what we strive for, and it is good to know that any team can win on any given night. BIG thanks to Greg Hadley and Will Meyer for making sure we stayed at 6 teams after things were looking shaky a couple of seasons ago.
Response:

Butt Ugly Canadiens vintage uniforms have Big Bird legs!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 5th, 2009 @ 9:09PM


Did anyone else see the HORRIBLE uniforms the Montreal Canadiens donned on Sat night against the Leafs? Those have to rank up there with the worst NHL uniforms of all time. If you didn\'t see it, they wore retro 1912-13 uniforms that were striped horizontally from shoulder to ankle in bleu, blanc, et rouge, and they looked like they had fuckin\' Big Bird legs! It was so bad it hurt my eyes to watch and I had a headache afterwards, and it wasn\'t because of the Leafs, either, so fuck you!

What I can\'t believe is that somebody actually approved that as a good idea. BROOOTAL! Did they thnk that those jerseys would be hot sellers for Christmas? I can see crates of those being sent to third world countries and then being sent back because they are so fuckin ugly.

Aaaaah. I feel better now.

McD
Response:

You're such a fashion queen

BY: rgrunds
Nov 6th, 2009 @ 12:43PM



Yeah, they looked like padded Hot Pants for orphans.
Response:

I dunno

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 6th, 2009 @ 2:28PM


I DO agree with ya McD that those jerseys are possibly the UGLIEST jerseys I have ever seen. But MAN the LEAFS SUCK~!! I saw today that Kaberle has 15 assists...he must have assisted on every goal so far!!!
Response:

Right call, Park.

BY: hkydoc
Nov 5th, 2009 @ 9:15PM


You got it right! But I think you should stop editing the website and your picks AFTER the games are over, Mr. Webmaster. Did you make sure you got credit for your assist from our game against the Brewers?
Response:

Scoring?

BY: kpark
Nov 9th, 2009 @ 8:50PM


Who is going to bounce back after big losses last wee? I just hope the Nords can find some energy to put a couple past Yacey! Last week was an abomination of hockey....being shut out 3-0 by the Brewers......really, who the hell gets shut out in Men's League Hockey. That's fucking embarrassing.

KP
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Nov 10th, 2009 @ 8:39AM


well looks like at least 3 of our stats r going to increase this week
Response:

Huh?

BY: kpark
Nov 10th, 2009 @ 8:44AM


Jordy, I rarely know what you are talking about! Can you try to put in at least ONE of your 22 breakaways tonight.

KP
Response:

toss up!

BY: kpark
Nov 10th, 2009 @ 8:46AM


This game is a toss up. It really could go either way, depending on who shows up for the River Rats.
Response:

Couldn't agree more

BY: McG
Nov 10th, 2009 @ 9:52AM


"Tuck has a solid defensive corps, and so does Tuck."
Response:

WHAT?!?!?

BY: kpark
Nov 10th, 2009 @ 10:19AM


Was that just a jab at the Nordique's defensive corp? Govenator....If I had any speed, talent or hockey sense, I would turn you like a top tonight. Instead, I'll just pull up at the top of the zone and fire a 35mph slapshot at your nuts!

KP
Response:

BY: McG
Nov 10th, 2009 @ 11:22AM


It was just a direct quote from a well-written pregame report.
Response:

LOVE THE PRE-GAME!

BY: kpark
Nov 10th, 2009 @ 10:22AM


McD, nice call on the pre-game! But I've never seen Condon explode! Oh right, I have, almost every game!

KP
Response:

Its too late now...

BY: hkydoc
Nov 10th, 2009 @ 11:43AM


HA! I guess that was a Freudian slip on my part for the pre-game report based on my own insecurities and fears about my own defensive game, and especially Park's...

Good job catching that one, McGovern!

McD
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Nov 10th, 2009 @ 11:49AM


sorry Mrs. Park ill try again...Well it looks like atleast 3 people will increase there Pick Em Stats during this game (based on the fact that only about 3 people picked us when there were only 11 picks total)......HINT HINT we are going to win...HINT HINT, its like working with nobody here, hire the handicape..and looking at the stats park, i think its about time you stop shooting like my sister and put a puck in the net
Response:

ouch!

BY: kpark
Nov 10th, 2009 @ 12:15PM


Hey Jordy, all I can say is that the Truth hurts. You cut me deep on that one. I had about 15 shots last week, and I think only one of them trickled to the net. I've been a a rigorous cycle of HGH The Clear over the past 5 days.

I feel much stronger, but my man boobs, or MOOBS, are growing. I've done a bunch of introspection and realized that I should not be shooting....ever.

KP
Response:

Great fucking game!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 11th, 2009 @ 12:49PM


I wish every Tuesday night was like our game against Tuck. They were smart, tough but clean, made us work hard in a very close game, and brought out the best in us every single shift. What a great game, and it coulda gone either way!

McD
Response:

Thoughts on the season

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 11th, 2009 @ 11:38AM


Well, after each team has met once, in my opinion the league looks awesome. SO much talent out there, and really no one is guaranteed a victory against anyone. Although the candy-ass Gamblers ARE 5-0, a couple of those could have went either way. On the flip-side of that, the Whalers really do look good. Although they sit last, An impressive win against DR shows the league they can score, they just need some solid D to help La Lallier. Refereeing has been great also. Being sustainable by having our own refs, really shows how much the league has grown. Although character refs like Tony \"John Holmes\" Gove was a treat to heckle on a regular basis, and that time I flung the puck at Gary Laperle, my bad Gary...anyhoo, the REAL fireball was always Eddie. Man, it was like having my MOM in the stands the way he\'d scream at everyone. And one night at OTG, he even called McDermott outside for a fight. Guess one too many Long Trails for him on that night. Bottom line is this: 6 good teams, plenty of talent, and good times after the game at Bend-over-gently\'s = one happy Canadian on a Tues. night. GO NORDS!!!
Response:

Marshy

BY: rgrunds
Nov 11th, 2009 @ 12:00PM


if I say something, are you going to yell at me?
Response:

Great start to the season so far...

BY: hkydoc
Nov 11th, 2009 @ 12:47PM


...and we couldn't do it without you, the players. Cheers to you as I raise my glass of Bleu Cheese in your honor! Thanks for making our dream of a great hockey league right here in the UV come true. I honestly wouldn't want to live here anymore if there wasn't a UVHL.

McD

P.S. Yes, Marshy will yell at you for sure, Grundy.
Response:

C'mon

BY: rgrunds
Nov 12th, 2009 @ 7:36AM


Marshy...you are being fey....

Now...c'mon...no one has threatened my health in at least a week.

ES
Response:

Go ahead

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 13th, 2009 @ 1:46PM


Say what you will Grundy...It IS still a free country, well, free speech for the most part anyway! Just friendly trash-talk, that's all!
Response:

WTF?

BY: hkydoc
Nov 11th, 2009 @ 12:51PM


Why the fuck don't you guys ever put shit in here? COME ON!

McD
Response:

JT Nov. 10 player of week

BY: rgrunds
Nov 12th, 2009 @ 8:46PM


Give it to him.

After listening to his color announcing in the scorekeeper\'s box, I realize he needs people to be nice to him.


ES

Response:

Chicken Wings......I\'ve been doing it all wrong!

BY: kpark
Nov 13th, 2009 @ 10:33AM


McDiesel, you are wasting your wings. This is amazing!

How to Correctly Eat A Chicken Wing

KP
Response:

They are NOT suppositories

BY: rgrunds
Nov 15th, 2009 @ 2:58PM


you HAVE been doing it wrong....
Response:

Would someone sharpen their crayon

BY: rgrunds
Nov 15th, 2009 @ 6:46AM


and get the write-ups done?

I wanna know.

ES
Response:

In progress...

BY: hkydoc
Nov 15th, 2009 @ 8:54AM


I'm finishing them today, sorry for the wait.

McD
Response:

Gamblers-Dead River

BY: hkydoc
Nov 15th, 2009 @ 10:01AM


posted!

McD
Response:

Tuck-Nords

BY: hkydoc
Nov 15th, 2009 @ 10:50AM


posted!

McD
Response:

Brewers-Whalers

BY: hkydoc
Nov 15th, 2009 @ 1:29PM


posted!

McD
Response:

Thanks to the CSEHL boys!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 15th, 2009 @ 8:58AM


A big thank you for a fun night to Chris, James, Mike and Josh for making the long trip to Campion last night from as far as St. Albans, VT to scrimmage, drink beer, eat wings, talk about hockey and the possibility of interleague playoffs between the UVHL and the CSEHL. Hockey stories were flying, and so were the laughs! We look forward to many more nights like this because this is what it is all about!

McD
Response:

Wicked smart boys ..

BY: Z-Skate
Nov 15th, 2009 @ 9:31AM


.. so I want to know if those wicked smart boys were able to impress the ladies w/ their B.A.C levels enough to get in their pants ..
Response:

Methinks they scored more on the ice

BY: hkydoc
Nov 15th, 2009 @ 10:58AM


Based on the body language at the bar both the beers and the ladies were cold to the med school UVHLers post-game... But you never know, they could have mounted a 3rd period comeback, a come from behind victory, or a miracle off ice (I couldn't resist)

McD
Response:

The wings ..

BY: Z-Skate
Nov 15th, 2009 @ 9:37AM


KP just for the record - I feel great and the wings will not have an effect on me for Tuesday. However, the 10 lbs. ham in the oven could cause some issues.

Boys, here's a link to the wing bowl in Philly. Lat years winner ate 203 in 30 minutes. I was alittle high on my estiamtes and low on the time. McD can you hang / these numbers?
http://www.philly.com/philly/sports/wingbowl/

Response:

Holy shit!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 15th, 2009 @ 11:00AM


Based on the fact that I tapped out after a mere two dozen last night, there is no way in hell I could keep up with those big boys! I'm not worthy... However, Park's new technique is intriguing...

McD
Response:

RIDICULOUS

BY: kpark
Nov 16th, 2009 @ 7:39AM


Z, I polished off about 8 wings and was on the shitter for 2 days! I sincerely hope you put down 8 lbs of ham yesterday. That way you might be slowed down to my speed and won't spin me like a top tomorrow night!

That was a blast on Saturday night. The CSEHL guys were a blast!

KP
Response:

Rookie ..

BY: Z-Skate
Nov 16th, 2009 @ 9:00AM


8 wings = 2 days

I am actually takign advantage of EBA's 1/2 priced wings tonight - I feel like I lost weight this weekend.
Response:

Open Challenge

BY: paldrich
Nov 19th, 2009 @ 10:41AM


Mcd,

Always willing to play the UVHL gang if you want to bus it to London. We have some great venues. One is an OHL rink, one is a nice 5 pad job adjacent to a casino, and there is even one close to a gay bar so Park has somewhere to hang after the game.
Response:

Harpooooooon the Whale?!?!?

BY: kpark
Nov 16th, 2009 @ 11:56AM


Who's showing up for the Whalers? Which team is going to show up? This should be a good game, our first game of the season definitely doesn't reflect how talented the Whalers are this year.

If Kenny shows up, which he usually does against the Nords, this one will be hard fought until they collapse in the last couple of minutes like they did all last season & last week against the Brew Crew.

KP
Response:

Not Fair to Condon....

BY: rgrunds
Nov 16th, 2009 @ 6:51PM


\"solid goaltending of Jered Condon returns to keep only but a very few pucks out of the Gamblers net,\"

That means most of the pucks go in.....

ASK me next time you want to compose a sentence.

ES
Response:

Which is it?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 17th, 2009 @ 5:25AM


Grundy, it made for much better reading when you and Condon were having a pissing contest over who knew more about goalie equipment. I actually think if you guys were in the same room there'd be a LOT of hair pulling and clawing.
Rrrow rrow. Pussies
Response:

It was SO upsetting

BY: rgrunds
Nov 17th, 2009 @ 5:36AM


I just didn't know what to do.....he tried to stab me with a mascara brush.....

ES
Response:

FREE Hockey Equipment Demo / Trial

BY: kpark
Nov 17th, 2009 @ 9:49AM


Hey guys, this is from our friends at Stateline Sports:


STATELINE SPORTS & UNION ARENA PRESENT
HOCKEY DEMO DAY

DECEMBER 10, 4:30-6:30
UNION ARENA

JOIN US AT UNION ARENA FOR AN ON ICE HOCKEY EQUIPMENT DEMO DAY. OPEN TO ALL AGES

ALL MAJOR HOCKEY COMPANIES WILL BE ON HAND WITH STICKS AND SKATES TO TRY ON THE ICE AND TO ANSWER ANY QUESTIONS YOU MAY HAVE.

Response:

i dunno

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 18th, 2009 @ 12:54PM


I think it would just make me mad that I can't afford a 300$ HOCKEY STICK!
Response:

HMMMMM

BY: kpark
Nov 18th, 2009 @ 12:56PM


very very true, but when will you EVER get the chance again to take some shots with a $300 hockey stick? Now that's the question.

KP
Response:

The tide is turning ..

BY: Z-Skate
Nov 17th, 2009 @ 1:09PM


I predict ol' Alexia "the cheap" and Jordan "Dr. Cross-Check" will be in the penalty box most of the night so who will score for the Nor-dicks? Shit, I fogot you have 3 lines .. dam. Well, hopefully it's a good game and I don't put any (too many) up around JT's head.
Response:

ZZZZZZZ

BY: kpark
Nov 17th, 2009 @ 3:38PM


You are going down tonight Z! We are rolling 5 lines tonight to pound your team into submission. I'm going to let a knuckle puck special fly past Kenny's glove at a dazzling 18 MPH.

KP
Response:

WOW

BY: kpark
Nov 18th, 2009 @ 12:58PM


Rumor has it that Tuck SMOKED the River Rats 9-0. Is this true? Rumor has it that Hadley thinks only 1 or 2 of those goals were his fault? Is that true?

What happened to the DR team? Is Tuck really that good, or is DR that bad?

KP
Response:

You stop that

BY: rgrunds
Nov 18th, 2009 @ 1:31PM


Hadley had knee surgery....plus he recently pulled a breast replacing a light bulb in his house...

It's so masculine the way he plays injured..
Response:

ECHL \"Kelly Cup\"

BY: rgrunds
Nov 19th, 2009 @ 8:09AM


Yup...the truth is stupider than fiction...ECHL champion wins the Kelly Cup.

Wanna drink from Hadley\'s Cup or Kelly\'s?

you choose.
Response:

JT POW

BY: rgrunds
Nov 19th, 2009 @ 3:35PM


Did you HAVE to post his picture...so close to dinner time.

hree-oh
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Nov 20th, 2009 @ 5:07AM


Here's hoping Jarod's injury is just a strain and you are back between the pipe's soon...That diving save on Bailey was INSANE!!!!
Response:

The Condor

BY: kpark
Nov 20th, 2009 @ 12:42PM


What happened? I missed the end of that game. Someone said a bunch of guys went to the net and Jered came out injured.

KP
Response:

30 saves/Every goalie

BY: rgrunds
Nov 20th, 2009 @ 4:22PM


all the goalies had 30 saves this week. (Condon-28)

Nice score keeping.
Response:

Amazing, eh

BY: hkydoc
Nov 21st, 2009 @ 11:26AM


I know, can you believe it, imagine the odds!
Response:

Time for change

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 21st, 2009 @ 8:42AM


I don\'t know about anyone else, but I\'m pretty tired of seeing the Gamblers on the front page. We all know they\'re 6-0, and we all know there the defending champs. How about a showcase of a new team? Maybe the new DR Rats? or the new-look Whalers? Just a thought, sine the homepage hasn\'t been updated in quite a while. If this involves a lot of work, forgive me. Not exactly an expert yet on web design. Overall though, the website is probably the best one I\'ve ever seen for a men\'s league!
Response:

Like we dont have enough to do already

BY: hkydoc
Nov 21st, 2009 @ 11:30AM


Okay, you take the pics, compose the text, and e-mail it to Kelly and he will post it. We have got enough on our plate already, Bud. Thanks for the suggestion though. Oh, and the site is by far the best hockey website out there, not just for a mens league (but you knew that already)

McD
Response:

I hear ya

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 22nd, 2009 @ 2:28PM


McD, I didn't mean it in a bad way, but I WILL take the photos on Tues. night after our game, and do a short write-up on either the Tuckies or the Whalers. Glad to help out in any way I can.
Response:

yeah yeah yeah

BY: kpark
Nov 23rd, 2009 @ 1:47PM


I'm working on making it so we can post different stuff up there, but have been balls out with work the past couple of months.

KP
Response:

wtf?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 21st, 2009 @ 8:45AM


Why is Hadley listed on the Gamblers as a back-up? and he's on the player list as well...just wondering..did he play?
Response:

You said 30 SOG

BY: rgrunds
Nov 21st, 2009 @ 12:14PM


McD.

You said thirty; not eleven.

I can't trust you.

Next thing you know, you'll tell me you're not a virgin..

sigh,

Kyle
Response:

Shorter recaps please

BY: rgrunds
Nov 21st, 2009 @ 5:33PM


Can you make them a bit shorter? It was really tedious wading through the Brewers/Tuck write ups. I mean, come on....you don\'t have to do War and Peace.

xx oo

ES
Response:

Grundo

BY: kpark
Nov 23rd, 2009 @ 1:46PM


Hey Grundy, you sure do have alot to say for a guy who has a career 7.00 GAA & .833 Save Percentage in the UVHL!!!!

McDermott is long winded, he does the writeups on the can while expelling the 150 chicken wings he ate the night before, so he has a couple of hours to write in the Loo. Do you know how hard it is to pass 150 chicken bones through your system.

KP
Response:

You're always protecting him

BY: rgrunds
Nov 23rd, 2009 @ 2:21PM


ever since he bought you that love harness and anal beads......

By the way....40 of the UVHL games last year had 5 or more goals scored per side.
Response:

Prepare to be bitch slapped with stats.

BY: kpark
Nov 24th, 2009 @ 5:58AM


Regardless of the average goals per game allowed, you still let up 7 goals, and you were playing for the team that allowed the fewest goals per game last season. Grundonator, the truth hurts dont it!

Secondly, if you went back in and calculated the percentages for last year...you are a nerd. Most importatly, out of the 36 goalie GP this season, only 8 of those goalie GP ended up letting in 7 or more, which is a mere 22%. BAM POW KABLOOEY.

KP


Response:

Kelly, Time for your Chunky Swirly

BY: rgrunds
Nov 24th, 2009 @ 6:23AM


That's what I said...8 goalies let in 7 or more this year...
Right. Just keep repeating what I said. You'll always be corret. That's good.

"Swirly" procedure in which the subject's head is placed in toilet bowl and flushed.

"Chunky Swirly"....figure it out.....

peaceniggaout
Response:

Here's my take Grundoffmyasscheese

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 24th, 2009 @ 10:15AM


Until you make amends to the league, and show that you CAN hang with the WORLD-CLASS NORDIQUES, you have no biznass shooting yer mouth off! I really have no right to either, but I put up decent numbers....for now...
Response:

Speaking of cheese, Smegma...

BY: rgrunds
Nov 24th, 2009 @ 10:27AM


Ha. I can do this....you'll see. In the meantime, Kelly should loosen his love harness. It is restricting the flow of blood to his brain.
Response:

That's 40 per cent last year-60 per cent this year

BY: rgrunds
Nov 23rd, 2009 @ 4:41PM


over forty per cent of the games last year had 5 or more goals scored by at least one side.

This year, to date, sixty percent of the games have had 5 goals or more scored by one team and Eight of the teams have scored 7 goals or more.

So, nah nah.

wah wah

ES
Response:

Can I be Player of the Week sometime

BY: rgrunds
Nov 23rd, 2009 @ 5:30PM


for doing fun writeups?
Response:

WEAK

BY: kpark
Nov 24th, 2009 @ 6:01AM


This has to be the weakest pre-game write-ups I have ever seen. WEAK WEAK WEAK. Nice in depth analysis, "this one could go either way".
Response:

Kelly is fussy today

BY: rgrunds
Nov 24th, 2009 @ 6:58AM


fuss fuss.
Response:

6

BY: McG
Nov 24th, 2009 @ 9:52AM


That's how many guys the Green Machine can muster tonight (no-shows near the holidays are an obvious downside to having a team full of students). Maybe 7 guys. At least 2 of them are being brought up out of the farm system.

How does the Whale feel about letting us dress a Nord or a Gambler if one of them feels like stretching his legs for an extra 90 mins? Only trying to get to 7, 8 guys tops to make sure it's a good skate.
Response:

Ironmen

BY: McG
Nov 24th, 2009 @ 10:07AM


Tuck might be interested in signing a Nord or Gambler to a one-game contract tonight, pending approval from Le Lallier and the Whale.
Response:

Laundry dude... The WHITES

BY: McG
Nov 24th, 2009 @ 10:10AM


We'll bring the white jerseys tonight as well.
Response:

Subs for Tuck

BY: Z-Skate
Nov 24th, 2009 @ 10:31AM


McG - no problem here. However, if you get Willy he has to play left handed.
Response:

BY: habs101
Nov 24th, 2009 @ 11:36AM


we only had 7 skaters one night too. (But wait we beat dead river). ok let'em dress
Response:

Totally understand, your call

BY: McG
Nov 24th, 2009 @ 11:42AM


I think we have 7 confirmed now, although 3 of them are call-ups from a B team. Completely your call on letting us grab a sub for an 8th, we can make it a good skate either way.
Response:

7

BY: Z-Skate
Nov 24th, 2009 @ 12:38PM


McG, grab a couple of subs as much as I would like to say no the "right" thing to do is let you grab some skaters.

Tuck has a B team .. WTF !! Do the whale have a feeder system?
Response:

USA Hockey

BY: hkydoc
Nov 24th, 2009 @ 12:07PM


Don't forget that all players that step on UVHL ice MUST be currently registered with USA Hockey, eh. Thanks.

McD


Response:

I updated it!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 24th, 2009 @ 12:09PM


Hey, I was in a rush when I did it... I finished it just for you, Pumpkin! (I meant ASSHOLE, but was too nice to say it)
Response:

Make some comments, FFS!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 24th, 2009 @ 12:10PM


What the hell? Are there only 5 guys who use this awseome website? Stop working and give us some shit!
Response:

BY: ghadley
Nov 24th, 2009 @ 12:13PM


keep eating your wings and blue cheese man toucher, the A team is showing up tonight and the brew crew will be crying in there pale of used hops!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Response:

OUCH

BY: kpark
Nov 28th, 2009 @ 11:35AM


What the fuck happened here? 14-4? Hads, did you get a penalty for roughing?

Poirier, you got into a fist fight?

Details please.
Response:

BY: Garrentee
Nov 24th, 2009 @ 3:26PM


Keep dreaming Hads!! Im gonna make you cry tonight!!

And Shawn, most of us work for a living and dont sit around and pretend to help peoples back problems.

Response:

BY: SK8VT
Nov 25th, 2009 @ 11:00AM


holy shellackinggg
Response:

Guido sez Contract on Meyer

BY: rgrunds
Nov 25th, 2009 @ 7:34PM


Guys from Cleveland aren\'t happy...no one gets Too big....

Willie...you\'re goin\' down next time....sorry kid....just a dive to some fish..no one will remember

fuggettaboudid
Response:

take care of your knee

BY: rgrunds
Nov 26th, 2009 @ 5:58AM


Hadley.

While you can still walk.
Response:

Why Kelly Likes Turkey

BY: rgrunds
Nov 26th, 2009 @ 10:05AM


They\'re already naked....

ES
Response:

Where's the FUCKING write-ups???

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 28th, 2009 @ 8:07AM


Are we going to have to wait until Monday to re-cap the game fellas? I mean, even Grundy would have had 'em done by Fri. I know McD is busy spreading his love all over MTL, and Kelly is between H1N1 flare-ups and that thing he calls "work". But, seriously, the awesome new website really doesn't look awesome when the shit is so outdated...sorry if I pissed anyone off,
wait a minute...no I'm not. Git R Done Boys!
Response:

Quit yer whining!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 28th, 2009 @ 11:31PM


...and stop smoking that funny stuff so you can backcheck and maybe even take a shootout attempt from the right angle with some speed!
Response:

good Nords write up

BY: rgrunds
Nov 28th, 2009 @ 11:00PM


Ha...parents tried to drown him as a child..

Good line...one among many....

nice job
Response:

Nice Write Ups McChew

BY: rgrunds
Nov 28th, 2009 @ 11:06PM


Interesting.

Nice work.

ES
Response:

Thanks, eh!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 28th, 2009 @ 11:33PM


What, were you up waiting for them tonight or did the live feed from the women's prison just end at the exact same time as I posted them? Glad you enjoyed them, eh!

McD
Response:

Live feed from the

BY: rgrunds
Nov 29th, 2009 @ 8:05AM


JUNVENILE prison.

See you tonight.

ES
Response:

Juvenile

BY: rgrunds
Nov 29th, 2009 @ 8:06AM


Jesus. I have been looking at Hadley's posts too much.

He better take care of his knee before he loses the lower part of his leg. Infections happen....
Response:

Yacey....

BY: rgrunds
Nov 29th, 2009 @ 9:32AM


Yacey People Are gettiNg sicK of U. We kNow wheRe Your KiDs Go to scHOoL. Aren\'T thEy cUte?
Response:

ok grundy

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 29th, 2009 @ 11:38AM


As a parent of two little girls, I would be extremely upset at that type of comment sir. We can all take trash talk, and now and then, take it to the next level. On that note, keep it within HOCKEY TALK aiiight. Wouldn't wanna make a trip up to BUM-FUCK VT, out in the back woods, down by the river, and bust up that Van of yours! Sleep tight Grundy..
Response:

NO sense of humor

BY: rgrunds
Nov 29th, 2009 @ 12:27PM


...every little thing...

Some people can ONLY find fault....
Response:

I thought it was HILARIOUS!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 29th, 2009 @ 8:19PM


C'mon, Marshy! That was funny! I laughed out loud, for real, when I read Grundy's post. I also thought the one about putting a mafia hit on Meyer was funny, too.

McD
Response:

ok....

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 30th, 2009 @ 8:39PM


maybe I did take it too personally, but Grundy...you are a strange dude...
Response:

relax...shut up.....

BY: rgrunds
Nov 30th, 2009 @ 8:46PM


it's OK. You don't have to say anything...

Do you think I ever take you seriously anyway?

It's not easy being me....the travel...the excitement...the shots to the head......
Response:

Hadley, Infection

BY: rgrunds
Nov 30th, 2009 @ 6:54AM


Too much stress on a post-op site can lead to infection.

Really. Knee infections are notorious for coming and staying. There are a lot of little moving parts in the knee that provide places for growth and hiding. It's hard to irrigate and treat an entire knee.

Negro, your head is too hard.
Response:

P.S.

BY: rgrunds
Nov 30th, 2009 @ 6:56AM


you suck dog balls and own no one.

You make silly comments about vaginas too...
Response:

COME ON WHALE!!!

BY: kpark
Nov 30th, 2009 @ 12:27PM


Here we go Whalers HERE WE GO! I'm calling on JT, Bartline,Lallier & Yacey to call in sick for this game. Let Hadley & Grundy get the extra ice and get lit up! DOWN WITH THE GAMBLERS!

Plus, I will have a camera ready to capture the salty puss on Meyer's face when they finally lose.

KP
Response:

Who's in Goal

BY: rgrunds
Dec 1st, 2009 @ 12:58PM


Hadley or Matt Barrett?
Response:

in net...

BY: kpark
Dec 1st, 2009 @ 1:31PM


A couple of sticks crossed dead center would be better in net than Hadley. Rumor has it that the great JEFF NORTON will be suiting up for the Dead River Rats tonight. Norto should help solidify their defense and protect that giant slice of swiss cheese between the pipes.

Should be a good one!

KP
Response:

Fucking Jeff Norton

BY: rgrunds
Dec 1st, 2009 @ 1:34PM


Could be a one sided one.

He was a significant part of the Islanders for a while, I think.

Guy's a monster. Went to my school.

Where'd he come from? I thought Nords Mike O'Neill was the only NHLer.

Good luck. May not need a goalie...right...
Response:

No...Jeff Norton...you can\'t do that

BY: rgrunds
Dec 1st, 2009 @ 1:32PM


That guy\'s a beast. He went to my university.

The fucker played about 15 years in the NHL...

Hadley won\'t even need a goalie.
Response:

Which one are you?

BY: McG
Dec 2nd, 2009 @ 1:47PM


The Ringer:

Some teams wait until the playoffs to unveil the Ringer, others dress him right from the opening faceoff. Either way, without the Ringer, your team is D-O-N-E. The challenge for managers is convincing a talented player to suit up for an awful team. This can be accomplished a number of ways, including promises of goal-scoring glory and player of the week nods. ost effective, however, is free hockey. It\'s simple math, really. Everyone else pays an extra $50 and everyone else gets a shot at the Division 7 title.

The Young Guy:

At first glance, the Young Guy can easily be mistaken for the Ringer, since he still wears the pants and socks of his junior or college team. But it\'s time for the next phase of life now punk, and that means an office job. The Young Guy’s in great shape for the first half of the year. Sadly, an increasingly sedentary existence catches up with him by Christmas. Ten to 20 pounds later, he\'s just another average Joe, huffing and puffing with the rest. Welcome aboard, kid.

The Old Guy:

Forget the 50-and-over league; that\'s not for him, even though his gloves run up to his armpits and he still uses a wooden stick. To be fair, the Old Guy can be an effective player, especially if he\'s a wily old guy. A hook here and a chop there… whatever it takes because that\'s how they did it when professional athletes were REAL MEN. “Eddie Shore – now THERE was a hockey player! Lost an ear against the Maroons, sewed it back on himself… Never missed a goddamn shift!”

The Tardy Goalie:

Hey, thanks for showing up... Only five minutes gone in the first. Not like you play a crucial position or anything. Take your time. Douche.

The Beginner:

Required only for cheap laughs. On the one hand, you have to admire the Beginner. It takes a lot of courage to take up hockey in your 40s. On the other, learn to take a goddamn pass, buddy. It\'s right on your stick for chrissakes. How does that knock you over? And now you\'re friggin offside! Not to mention the Beginner shows up for every game, ruining a shift no matter what time or what day it is. Sunday night playoff game at 11:30PM? No worries, Mr. Beginner will be there.

The Complete Psycho:

Also good for a few chuckles . . . nervously and from afar. The Complete Psycho is capable of anything: running the goalie, challenging an entire bench, delivering a vicious tomahawk chop – all well-practiced and all in the repertoire. Do not feed the complete psycho. He doesn\'t want to be fed. He wants to hunt. Likely to carry on his act in the bar after the game.

The Naked Guy:

Bane of the dressing room. Most players have the courtesy to stretch their hamstrings while sporting—at the very least—a bit of underwear. Not the Naked Guy. Invariably equipped with a very strange looking penis, he’s apt to carry on lengthy conversations with one foot up on a bench. Best to maintain eye contact like your life depends on it… Because if you don’t, his dork will terrorize you in your dreams for weeks.

The Guy with the New Girlfriend:

Load up on a few of these to lower everyone else\'s fees. The Guy with the New Girlfriend will show up to five games—tops—so it\'s not like you\'ll lose ice time by putting him on the roster. That said, beware that the Guy with the New Girlfriend might very well turn into the Guy with the Wife, at which point he\'ll never miss another game.

The Organizer:

This guy is absolutely brutal, but since nobody else could be bothered to do all the paperwork and collect the money he gets to play. He’s frustrating to play with because he can barely skate let alone take a pass, but nobody gets mad at him because he\'s a really nice guy. Is often heard in the dressing room saying things like “Sorry guys, that one was my fault” and if he\'s lucky somebody will chip in with something like “No worries Donny, it\'s a team effort.” What everybody is really thinking is “Hey Donny, you could strap skates onto a retarded chimpanzee and it’d do a better job right there… and yes you are right, that was absolutely, 100% your fault.” If you are lucky the Organizer is usually smart enough to take himself off the ice in critical situations.


The Minor Hockey Allstar:

Looks promising at first glance as he fools you with reasonably good skills, but after you get zero passes through the first three games of the season you\'ll get the picture. This guy topped out at \'AA\' Midget and can be spotted by the huge blinders attached to his helmet. Play is characterized by energetic rushes down the wing (no pass), then into the corner (still no pass), behind the net (hey fuckstick, I\'ve been open for the past 5 minutes), then into the next corner (everybody has gone back to the bench to watch) followed by a blind giveaway pass to the high slot resulting in a textbook breakout for other team, and finished off with an accusation that this was all somehow everyone else’s fault. Cut this guy.

The Johnny Try Hard:

Great to have on your team but they suck to play against because they have somehow managed to keep themselves in impossibly good shape. They were probably the star on their high school hockey team and won athlete of the year because they played hockey, ran track, and wrestled all in the same year. Guaranteed to have a membership at the local health club, and gets off on triathlons and raw vegetables. Play is characterized by seemingly inexhaustible hustle, which if caught off guard can embarrass the more talented yet fatter player.

The Stanley Cup Champion:

This player will celebrate like it means something when they score. Scratch that – like it means EVERYTHING when they score. If this is an opposing player you must nip this behavior in the bud by catching him off guard with a devastating open ice hit that causes him to blow snot bubbles and causes onlookers to feel sort of sick. If he’s on your team, your only course of action is to quickly chastise him in front of the opposing team to let them know that this is not how the rest of your team rolls. Remind him how much of a loser he is by retrieving the puck from the net the next time he scores and presenting it to him in front of the other team.

The Tough Guy:

This guy maxed out at the house-league level, has never been in a fight, and is characterized by cartoonishly antagonistic behavior on the ice. The fact that your beer league does not allow fighting has given this guy a false sense of courage. What the Tough Guy does not realize is that these rules will not actually do anything to prevent someone from knocking his teeth down his throat if he cheap shots the wrong guy. Get creative, there are a number of fun ways to handle this type of player, all of which result in him lying on the ice bleeding, groggily looking for his teeth, and crying.

The Wrong Guy:

Not to be confused with the Complete Psycho, this guy shows up, doesn\'t say much, and pretty much flies under the radar. The kid that gave him the cheap shot will eventually look his name up on Hockey DB after his reconstructive facial surgery and realize he had 355 PIMS in the ECHL three years ago.

The Gary Roberts:

Can only be described as being WAY too intense. This guy is one of your better players but is unable to adjust to or accept the lower level of play. At best, he will try to coach players on the fly. At worst, he will snap and call his entire team a bunch of house-leaguers. He believes the game should be played a certain way and despises \'pond hockey\' style play with no backchecking or positional assignments. He’s most likely suffering from an Unfinished Business Complex from his previous hockey career and is looking to capture some shred of glory via the rec-league championship. This guy is probably better off playing with his own kind in a senior-A league.

The Gear Guy:

More money than brains. This guy is a mediocre player who compensates for poor skating and a girlish slapshot by always having the latest, hottest gear. Watching him suit up is like flipping through the Hockey News equipment review issue. He starts by stuffing his chubby frame into skin-tight UnderArmour, followed by massive, ultralight pads. He shows up with shiny new blades every year, claiming that the last pair \"just never felt right\" and boasting that he feels faster because his new skates only weigh 17 nanograms. A couple of weeks after Ovechkin sports a yellow visor, this knob shows up with one. Best of all are the sticks… While everybody else does just fine with bargain rack specials, this guy hauls out a Warrior Kronik before anyone has even heard of it. He sucks, but he\'s handy to have around because he’s guaranteed to have an extra elbow pad and a spare pair of gloves in his bag.

Response:

Shit....

BY: kpark
Dec 2nd, 2009 @ 1:52PM


I must be the organizer...

"THE ORGANIZER....This guy is absolutely brutal, but since nobody else could be bothered to do all the paperwork and collect the money he gets to play. He%u2019s frustrating to play with because he can barely skate let alone take a pass..."

McG...Not cool for pointing that out.

KP
Response:

Me too McG

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 2nd, 2009 @ 3:30PM


Not sure where I fall into all of that...but for some strange reason you've managed to make me feel like playing in the B league. Not sure if next week I'll get in a scrap, skate around with the puck aimlessly, call out the entire opposing team, Buy that sweet new stick I CANNOT afford, or just smoke my way through an 8-ball of Rut-Vegas Crack-Cocaine. No matter what, I'll be the guy skating my ass off, then after 30-45 seconds coming to the bench...
Nice job Ryan...Marshy
Response:

AUTHOR! AUTHOR!

BY: rgrunds
Dec 2nd, 2009 @ 3:21PM


Nice work. You should get paid for that.

ES
Response:

BY: McG
Dec 2nd, 2009 @ 4:01PM


Ha! Not an original piece, had it forwarded to me earlier today... Although I did try to clean it up and add some funnies.
Response:

You Bastard

BY: rgrunds
Dec 2nd, 2009 @ 6:50PM


I was sure you composed that yourself. I'm so disillusioned....Next thing you're going to tell me you're not a virgin..

You and McD....I'll never trust anyone again....
Response:

I am definitely the:

BY: hkydoc
Dec 3rd, 2009 @ 8:22AM


MORE TALENTED YET FATTER PLAYER mentioned at the end of the Johnny Try Hard!

Thanks, McG! That was some funny shit! I could picture at least one of each kind of player mentioned, and there are a few currently present in the UVHL, but I'm not naming any names or mentioning any specific goalies that show up late for the Nordiques and cause a delay of game penalty...

McD
Response:

The Right Guy

BY: rgrunds
Dec 3rd, 2009 @ 9:06AM


Another category

The Right Guy

this is a person who grew up knowing that the world is a place indifferent to innocence and that other humans primarily see you as an object of exploitation, theft and extraction. The only adaptation to this condition is to maintain your group and intimidate those who breath funny in your direction. A player like this is the first to enter a fight on behalf of his teammate and is the largest person in the scrum. He also has the means to silence an entire bench by standing before it and asking %u201Cwho's first?%u201D; then remaining there until he feels like skating away and everyone is staring at their own laces. Has access to a 9mm as needed. Guess who.


Response:

Thanks Grunds

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 3rd, 2009 @ 3:48PM


I'm flattered...But unfortunately, Canadians don't believe in using guns..
Except the Howitzer...
Response:

Mostly Tardy Goalie

BY: jt
Dec 3rd, 2009 @ 6:37PM


With a healthy dose of Gary Roberts and a dash of Complete Psycho! Ryan this is funny shit. The Nords locker room has pretty much one of each character!
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Dec 3rd, 2009 @ 6:25AM


did I read that right? There was a penalty for head butting?
Response:

WTF?

BY: vtdownhiller
Dec 3rd, 2009 @ 6:25AM


did I read that right? There was a penalty for head butting?
Response:

Yeah!

BY: kpark
Dec 3rd, 2009 @ 12:31PM


Pattison head butted me! Bloody nose, loose tooth. Who fucking head butts in hockey. FUCKING DEUSCHBAG.
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Dec 3rd, 2009 @ 12:44PM


agreed...although you probably deserved it...I don't suppose you are still opting not wear a mouth gaurd?
Response:

Deserve?

BY: kpark
Dec 3rd, 2009 @ 12:50PM


I deserve alot of things, but I'm not sure a headbutt from a guy wearing a cage qualifies as one.

The best part is that after I checked to make sure my teeth were still there, I called him a coward, his response..."You're a f'n p*ssy for wearing a shield." The guy wearing a full cage who head butted me, called me out for wearing a half shield......hmmmmmm!
Response:

your right

BY: vtdownhiller
Dec 3rd, 2009 @ 2:12PM


I forgot he wears a full cage, must have been obvious enough to get a penalty call...put it right up there with checking from behind and butt ending.
Response:

Blowout

BY: Garrentee
Dec 6th, 2009 @ 11:21AM


I predict a complete blowout in this game...thats me blowing out kelly's knee after I turn him inside out!!
Response:

Garrenteed in deed

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 7th, 2009 @ 4:30PM


Although you MAY turn Park inside out, we as a team are gonna make swiss cheese outta your goaltender! PB may be a good keeper, but I'm predicting a 6-4 Nordique victory, with 759 mins in penalties to go along with that..by you, of course...
Response:

McD, Good write ups

BY: rgrunds
Dec 7th, 2009 @ 6:44AM


Nice analyses. Yeah.

ES
Response:

McD, Good write ups

BY: rgrunds
Dec 7th, 2009 @ 6:45AM


Nice analyses. Yeah.

ES
Response:

Thanks, eh.

BY: hkydoc
Dec 8th, 2009 @ 9:28AM


I'm glad at least one person reads them...

McD
Response:

Impossible!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 7th, 2009 @ 4:31PM


Why? Because how can you possibly take Kelly out if you're always in the f'n box for hooking? Not only that, but he doesn't build up enough speed to damage anything. Besides, even IF you get past him, I'll be there, too, and even with your long reach it is a looong way around McD's Bleu Cheese Belly!

It should be another great game between two solid teams who enjoy each other's competition and post-game camaraderie, eh. See you on the ice!

McD
Response:

.. hmm ..

BY: Z-Skate
Dec 8th, 2009 @ 6:08AM


I could make sure all 4 of you aren't on the ice all that much if you like .. One thing is for sure, penalties could be at an all time low w/ Gooch & I reffing !!
Response:

ZZZZZZ

BY: kpark
Dec 8th, 2009 @ 9:06AM


Big-Z, what do you mean all 4 of us? I'm just an innocent bystander here getting trashed by Poirier, McD & Marshy.

I'm always innocent. I have never taken a penalty that I deserved.

McD.....very funny comment about me not being able to go fast enough to actually hurt myself!!! HA HA HA.

I'm psyched for this one. KP
Response:

Me too

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 8th, 2009 @ 12:00PM


I don't think I trashed you on this one KP, but your stealth-like speed is certainly deceptive. So deceptive in fact, that your own TEAMMATES don't even know what you're doing! LOL ... While most of us are gazing at Isaacs streaking up the wing at break-neck speed, only to miss the net...or Bayley turning just about everyone inside out, or Al "The Ageless One" Sorrentino teleporting from the corner to the front of the net, just in time to bang home the garbage, or Danny "Chubby Hubby" Charrette with a MISSILE from the point, the Brewers have many weapons, which the Nords will have to contain in order to Pound them into submission...WE SHALL SEE!!!
Response:

Norton Wild Card

BY: rgrunds
Dec 8th, 2009 @ 9:46AM


If Norton shows, DR changes it's odds.
Response:

Correction to the pre-game report

BY: McG
Dec 8th, 2009 @ 10:05AM


Just want to give Mr. Stephen Kenning the press he deserves -- he'll be donning the pads for Tuck tonight. Please drop the over/under and reverse those odds immediately.
Response:

Wow, I love the confidence!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 8th, 2009 @ 12:47PM


You heard it from the Governator himself: Tuck expects to upset the Gamblers tonight no matter if Blue is centering Marrazzo and Ammel on the newly formed BAM line!!! Kenning is PUMPED to be in net in place of Yacey, and played goal before deferring to Yace this season. Lets get ready to rumble!

McD
Response:

Doesn't anybody on these two teams read this shit?

BY: hkydoc
Dec 8th, 2009 @ 12:51PM


C'mon, guys! Put in some trash talk and show you actually care about who wins or loses! Give us some shit, too, for fuck's sake.

McD
Response:

McD

BY: rgrunds
Dec 8th, 2009 @ 1:21PM


Park's your uncle....
Response:

McD

BY: rgrunds
Dec 8th, 2009 @ 1:22PM


Marshy's your offspring....
Response:

Addition by subtraction

BY: stevekenning
Dec 8th, 2009 @ 1:43PM


This is all ignoring how much tighter Tuck should expect to be on offense with me tucked safely out of the way in net.
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Dec 8th, 2009 @ 2:21PM


Wow our own kind Double Mc Cheese aint even picking us tonight disappointing...
Response:

Yah! I love it!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 8th, 2009 @ 3:18PM


A first Forum post by Kenning, and a funny one at that! Nice job, eh.

McD
Response:

How will you spend your Snow Day?

BY: hkydoc
Dec 9th, 2009 @ 7:32AM


Hmm...let me see. I think I\'ll thaw some wings and deep fry them, drench them in Buffalo Sauce and Bleu Cheese and have a nice balanced breakfast with some freshly squeezed orange juice and whole grain toast. Then I\'ll do my write ups early with this found time I suddenly have on a Wednesday so Kelly doesn\'t whine like a little cranky bitch (just you wait \'till its your turn! NUDGE! NUDGE! NUDGE!). Maybe I\'ll even read the USA Hockey Rule Book start to finish so I can call obscure penalties like Tony Gove did on JT in the playoffs one year for covering the puck behind the goal line. After that some \"alone time\" and an afternoon nap, then to top it off some belly dancing (because no matter that kind of dancing I do it is a belly dance) and power yoga around the house listening to the Tragically Hip in a frantic Bleu Cheese frenzy drinking it out of the Whalen Cup!

But seriously, what are you gonna do, eh?

McD
Response:

A Good Breakfast

BY: rgrunds
Dec 9th, 2009 @ 9:08AM


Don't forget to wash it all down with a cup of oil.


Did Meyer play last night?
Response:

snow day?!??!

BY: kpark
Dec 9th, 2009 @ 10:51AM


SNOW DAY?!?!? Who the hell has a snow day today? I'm here at work......working. Ok, not working really, but thinking about all the work I should be doing.

KP
Response:

Plowing?

BY: kpark
Dec 9th, 2009 @ 3:07PM


Hey guys, does anyone know of a good plowing company that does residential? My guy just dropped off the face of the earth and I came home to 10 inches of snow in my driveway.

Thanks,

KP
Response:

BY: McG
Dec 9th, 2009 @ 3:11PM


Hire McD -- he apparently not very busy on "snow days".
Response:

AHHHH McD!!

BY: kpark
Dec 9th, 2009 @ 3:19PM


Great Idea. He doesn't even need a plow. McD can just roll around my driveway, flattening all the snow and then all of the chicken bones that fall off his body will get crushed and act like sand.

McD, how much do you charge? Can I just pay you in fuel (wings)?

KP
Response:

HA!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 9th, 2009 @ 6:07PM


Nice one! I actually pulverize the snow in such a fashion as described! Unfortunately the packed down ice and bone-sand mix doesn't usually melt until mid-July...

I use Scott Willey 295-3421, but I don't know if he does Quechee. Ask Kenny if he knows anyone from around there.

McD
Response:

I'm sure

BY: rgrunds
Dec 10th, 2009 @ 8:13AM


McD would plow Park. Those two snow bunnies will have a delightful time...


Response:

Stats NUDGE?

BY: hkydoc
Dec 9th, 2009 @ 6:10PM


If I can get nudged on a fucking Wednesday for the write-ups, then you sure as hell can get NUDGED for the stats, Park! Set one up, fair is fair! You do sit at a computer all day pretending to work, don\'t you, Nerd? (ha ha ha ha ha)

McD
Response:

C'mon, Park!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 9th, 2009 @ 10:10PM


Why aren't the stats done yet, huh? You've had all day and just sit there at your desk staring at your computer screen collecting a paycheck. Its Thursday now! NUDGE NUDGE NUDGE (ha ha ha ha ha ha ha)

McD
Response:

loser!

BY: kpark
Dec 10th, 2009 @ 7:19AM


Really McD!!! You were at home all day for a "snow day", and you still couldn't get your fatass out of bed to finish the writeups. Stop having phone sex with your Canadian boyfriend, put down the tub of blue cheese, and GIT 'ER DONE!

By the way.....stats....DONE! FU
Response:

Really?

BY: hkydoc
Dec 10th, 2009 @ 8:21PM


Sensitive, are we? Looks like I hit a nerve and somebody (you) doesn't like a taste of his own medicine! I can't fucking WAIT to start nudging you come mid-January... Regardless, I must say we are doing a fucking fantastic job running this thing, Bro, no matter what JT says! (ha!)

As far as my Snow Day went, I had a little too much "alone time" and had a killer 3 hour nap! What a day!

McD
Response:

New editing of game write-up

BY: hkydoc
Dec 9th, 2009 @ 10:08PM


In case you read it earlier, I added and corrected a couple of things just now to the game write-up. So, read it again, eh!

McD
Response:

UVHL welcomes The Chiefs from the CSEHL on Dec. 29th!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 9th, 2009 @ 10:35PM


We will be hosting our friends from the CSEHL in place of Tuck against the Dead River Oilers (who had better be on their best behavior, OR ELSE!). I am confirming whether or not the Chiefs can make the 6:40 PM game time, and if not then it will be moved to the 8:05 game on that particular night only.

This should be a LOT of fun and will go a long way to more interleague games and possibly have interleague playoffs between Vermont\'s best adult hockey leagues! (and Bentley\'s had better be ready to host a great post-game!)

McD
Response:

Big Idea

BY: rgrunds
Dec 10th, 2009 @ 8:16AM


This is a real publicity possibility.

I'll write McD an email. Local papers should be contacted and an article prepared. Like, local papers in Burlington, Barre and WR/Woodstock.

Don't underestimate the potential of this. Members of the 1960 Olympic team came from a Minnesota league not unsimilar to yours.

I have an idea.

Get the Jew.....
Response:

Not really clear McD

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 10th, 2009 @ 3:03PM


Are we (the Nords) playing the Chiefs? or DR? I know you said in place of Tuck, that DR had better be on their best behavior, does that mean DR is playing against them? Not only do they NOT have a full team, but their overall credibility as hockey players for the most part SUCKS! With a few exceptions of course.
Response:

Dead River vs. The Chiefs

BY: hkydoc
Dec 10th, 2009 @ 8:26PM


And I quote: "in place of Tuck against the Dead River Oilers", eh.

You are right that the Oilers had better keep their heads in this friendly contest. McGovern will play on their squad since he will be the only Tuckie in town, and they can use his poise and puck movement on D.

McD
Response:

Good ideas, Bob.

BY: hkydoc
Dec 10th, 2009 @ 8:28PM


Thanks for the feedback and brainstorming, I'll send you an e-mail about it.

McD
Response:

Difficulty posting write-up

BY: hkydoc
Dec 9th, 2009 @ 10:38PM


Just so you don't have to wait, here is what I have done so far for this game, but the Administration website would not let me post it. I will finish it soon, and Kelly will fix the bug.

Kenning leads Tuck to Gamblers' first "loss"

FYI: I am trying a new format for the game write-ups and will omit recounting every goal, assist and penalty in consecutive order since you can easily see that in the boxscores section. I will primarily focus on game highlights and analysis in the body of the report, and will continue with my trademark Final Score, Final Analysis, and Final Tally at the conclusion.

Yes, the Gamblers still remain undefeated, but even with a shootout loss as the sole blemish on their record Tuck deserves credit for putting the first real chink in their armor.

IN PROGRESS...

Shootout:

Tuck - Helming - nice save by JT down low
Gamblers - Marrazzo - big save by Kenning down low
Tuck - Hay - nasty goal over JT's right shoulder in top corner
Gamblers - Ammel - nice save by Kenning down low
Tuck - McGovern - nice shot just past JT's glove

Final Score: Tuck wins 2-0 in shootout after 4-4 regulation tie.

Final Analysis: Both teams wanted it, both goalies played well, and it was fitting that both teams scored late in the game and received penalties balancing things out. The Gamblers showed their never die attitude scoring on the PP to force a shootout and remain undefeated.

Final Tally: Check out the Boxscores section for the stats, eh! Don%u2019t forget to vote for the UVHL Long Trail Player of the Week. The winner gets to pick up a FREE case of beer at Long Trail Brewery thanks to super CEO (and former Notre Dame superstar and UVHL Brewer) Brian Walsh!
Response:

Kenning leads Tuck to Gamblers' first "loss"

BY: hkydoc
Dec 10th, 2009 @ 5:39PM


FYI: I am trying a new format for the game write-ups and will omit recounting every goal, assist and penalty in consecutive order since you can easily see that in the boxscores section. I will primarily focus on game highlights and analysis in the body of the report, and will continue with my trademark Final Score, Final Analysis, and Final Tally at the conclusion.

Yes, the Gamblers still remain undefeated, but even with a shootout loss as the sole blemish on their record Tuck deserves credit for putting the first real chink in their armor. The Gamblers had 8 regulars and did not need the Medicare line of Blue, Phillips and Dakai to fill in the gaps after all. I was looking forward to a BAM line of Blue-Ammel-Marrazzo, but Meyer was there and the absolutely lethal MMA line remained intact.

Kenning was PUMPED to be back in goal, and Tuck played well in front of him. When the Gamblers got chances, Kenning was there with quick pads and a more stand-up style to turn the puck away. Turner was solid in relief duty for the injured Condon, and even took one off the mask on a wicked shot from a streaking Tuck forward heading down the left side of the ice.

On one play in the second a Tuck forward had a partial breakaway and sped down towards JT in the Gamblers' net. Defender Scott Fraser took him from the right side and plowed him into JT, who was furious, and deservedly so, and the net crashed off its moorings. JT had words with the Tuck player, but it was his defender at fault. This produced some healthy discussion post-game about goalie safety, especially with Jered Condon out with a knee injury on a play where 2 of his players and 2 offensive players crashed the net and twisted his knee. The last thing we need are goalies going down to injury. We are lucky to have so many solid and capable goalies in this league, and they need to be protected. Lets use some common sense, and stay out of the crease, go after the puck with your stick ONLY if you can honestly see it and think you can get it, otherwise give 'em a frickin' break!

Both squads played really well in this one, and it was good hockey from start to finish! Apparently the reffling left much to be desired and constructive criticism was such that the results of a play were called more than the infractions themselves, and that it would be better to call the hacks, slashes and body contact over the trips and hooks. Food for thought...all we wanna do is get it right, keep it clean, fair and fun.

Kenning even got an ASSIST on the go-ahead goal and it directed off of him, purposely, to Helming who advanced up the ice for the PPG breaking a 3-3 tie. For a moment it looked like the Gamblers would lose this one, but their tenacity won it for them again as Marrazzo was taken out heading down the left side with the puck at full speed. If one player on the MMA line isn't scoring the other two are. This time it was Ammel with the All-Star performance who was dangerous all game and scored a CLUTCH goal on the PP with 28 seconds left to force the shootout and keep the Gamblers undefeated at 8-0-1.

Shootout:

Tuck - Helming - nice save by JT down low
Gamblers - Marrazzo - big save by Kenning down low
Tuck - Hay - nasty goal over JT's right shoulder in top corner
Gamblers - Ammel - nice save by Kenning down low
Tuck - McGovern - nice shot just past JT's glove

Final Score: Tuck wins 2-0 in shootout after 4-4 regulation tie.

Final Analysis: Both teams wanted it, both goalies played well, and it was fitting that both teams scored late in the game and received penalties balancing things out. The Gamblers showed their never die attitude scoring on the PP to force a shootout and remain undefeated. This was a good game, and it was fun to ref. We let go many body contact (and other) infractions as evenly as possible, and hopefully it balanced out. All the penalties were obstruction, and there was no bullshit, but there was whining and complaining, and we can deal with that. Kenning was a solid back up to Yacey, played really well, and you could see the rust falling off each period as he just got better and better with more and more confidence. Tuck plays well as a team, and McGovern and Helming are incredible with distributing the puck from the back end. Tuck makes great passes coming out of the zone, they create breakaways, and work the puck well in the offensive end. The Gamblers continue to have the best neutral zone play and transition game, thereby making their offense that more potent and fast. I also don't think that there is a better line than the MMA line at cycling the puck and working it to the front of the net or distributing it in the offensive zone. The Gamblers use the points, too, and that creates offense as well. Allison Malcolm is a force on faceoffs, and there isn't a better positional player in the league on forward. Period. Both of these teams could win the Whalen Cup in 2009-10.

Final Tally: Check out the Boxscores section for the stats, eh! Don%u2019t forget to vote for the UVHL Long Trail Player of the Week. The winner gets to pick up a FREE case of beer at Long Trail Brewery thanks to super CEO (and former Notre Dame superstar and UVHL Brewer) Brian Walsh!
Response:

Nice write up

BY: rgrunds
Dec 10th, 2009 @ 7:59PM


really liked the final analysis and it's description of strategy and team practices.

Yeah. Nice. Interesting
Response:

I added more tonight, too.

BY: hkydoc
Dec 10th, 2009 @ 8:16PM


Updated game write-up tonight as well. Read it, eh!

McD
Response:

Crowson POW ?

BY: rgrunds
Dec 11th, 2009 @ 4:59PM


because he loses his scoring cherry? That gets a visit from the tooth fairy, or something. Not POW.

The Tuck sub goalie......there\'s an accomplishment.

Goalies are special and better.
Response:

Midnight surprise?

BY: hkydoc
Dec 11th, 2009 @ 7:37PM


So does that mean you're giving him a little visit? You're right about oone thing...goalies are "special".

McD
Response:

one thing IS for sure

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 11th, 2009 @ 9:09PM


The only SPECIAL treatment you received Grundy, is the Special Education you got growing up a window-licker on the short bus...
Response:

You Stop That both of You

BY: rgrunds
Dec 11th, 2009 @ 9:20PM


You know how upset I can get. Plus, I would never say anything insulting or inflammatory about anybody.

Ever.

What's a short bus...?
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Dec 12th, 2009 @ 12:35AM


haahah marshy now that is funny
Response:

I'm not on the short bus

BY: rgrunds
Dec 13th, 2009 @ 11:53AM


I'm smart. Can we go to the day room now and have some sweet soda?
Response:

I'm not on the short bus

BY: rgrunds
Dec 13th, 2009 @ 11:53AM


I'm smart. Can we go to the day room now and have some sweet soda?
Response:

Brewers padding vote

BY: rgrunds
Dec 12th, 2009 @ 8:38AM


The Brewers are all voting multiple times. Or, Crowson is voting for himself every hour.

Recall.....
Response:

Tuck-Gamblers write-up is posted in DISCUSSION section, eh.

BY: hkydoc
Dec 11th, 2009 @ 7:44PM


It has been done and is posted already, there is an error in the Admin website and it won\'t save it for some reason. I tried to post it 4 times and it would never take. Kelly will try to fix it, sorry for the website error.

McD
Response:

Be fair in POW voting!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 12th, 2009 @ 11:36PM


I\'m making an executive decision and I am re-setting the POW votes. You should only vote 2-3 times at the most! Right now the voting for Crowson and Kenning are each over 300 each and the next closest is 17 votes. Crowson leads by about 100, so I am taking off 90% of each of their votes away and hopefully it will be reasonalbe and fair from here on in.

Its okay to get your wife or gf to vote for you, co-workers, parents, gram and gramps, too...but voting excessively ruins the intent of the poll and the award. Have fun, but don\'t be ridiculous (that is my job and Park\'s job!).

McD
Response:

Voting Programs Not Allowed

BY: rgrunds
Dec 13th, 2009 @ 11:57AM


Ha. Someone hooked up a voting program to Kelly's site.

Hey Kelly, run a scan.....this is worse than the Bush election theft against Gore.

ES
Response:

You've become hysterical

BY: rgrunds
Dec 13th, 2009 @ 12:01PM


What makes you think there is any irregularity? Just because there are 535 votes for Kenning and 477 for Crowson?

Just because there are more votes than players?

Jeez McD, people are just being......enthusiastic.
Response:

voting

BY: goaliem31
Dec 14th, 2009 @ 2:24PM


seems to that there should be a log in to vote for POW if you want to keep it to a realistic voting count.
Response:

POW is now re-set.

BY: hkydoc
Dec 14th, 2009 @ 7:12PM


Okay UVHL fans, I just re-set the poll and extended the re-vote wait time by posting a completely new one. Lets see some true voting, no voting programs that automatically vote, and some realistic numbers. We love enthusiasm, so please don't stop that part of it, eh!

McD
Response:

All for a case of Long Trail

BY: stevekenning
Dec 14th, 2009 @ 7:24PM


Yacey fired off an email to 500 of our closest friends here in Hanover. What can I say, Tuck loves Tuck Hockey. Not sure how Crowson's tally got up so high though...
Response:

BY: ceckbo
Dec 14th, 2009 @ 7:28PM


hm, there are about 2-300 enthusiastic tuck fans that have been showing their support for Kenning's win that will probably be a little irked by that decision.
Response:

BY:
Dec 14th, 2009 @ 8:02PM


For the record, I voted 4 (or 6, 7, 8, 9, 10) times for myself. The rest was probably from:

- the future doctors of DMS
- a facebook group
- went international with the Canadian connection.

With all of the free marketing, I think I deserve a case regardless.

Automatic voters? Really?
Response:

Battle for 2nd

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 14th, 2009 @ 6:44PM


Gonna be good game, and a battle for 2nd place overall. The Gamblers will take a few weeks to catch, but a win streak should start here for the Nords..
Response:

Tuck by 3

BY: Z-Skate
Dec 15th, 2009 @ 6:30AM


.. Do I need to say more ..
Response:

BY: McG
Dec 15th, 2009 @ 7:38AM


Nope, that was perfect.
Response:

Tuck? Ha.....

BY: rgrunds
Dec 15th, 2009 @ 8:40AM


Don't worry about those feminized elitists.

They spend all their time wearing ascots, sipping sherry and contemplating their canes. (Yes, canes are an old Dartmouth tradition and were used to strike and hit the local white servant class when they displeased college affiliates).

They are so spineless, they even stopped using the college team name "Indians" to please some Bikenstock clad, radical, feminist, dildo packing, hairy calf, vegetarians who claimed it demeaned colored people.

Nords, go get you a Indian.....

hihowareya hihowareya, hihowareya....
Response:

Prediction FAIL.

BY: stevekenning
Dec 15th, 2009 @ 3:08PM


Tuck by 4. Sherry at 11.
Response:

Tuck v Nords?

BY: rgrunds
Dec 15th, 2009 @ 8:47AM


Tuck? Ha.....

Don\'t worry about those feminized elitists.

They spend all their time wearing ascots, sipping sherry and contemplating their canes. (Yes, canes are an old Dartmouth tradition and were used to strike and hit the local white servant class when they displeased college affiliates).

They are so spineless, they even stopped using the college team name \"Indians\" to please some Bikenstock clad, radical, feminist, dildo packing, hairy calf, vegetarians who claimed it demeaned colored people.

Nords, go get you a Indian.....

hihowareya hihowareya, hihowareya....
Response:

Tonto

BY: hkydoc
Dec 16th, 2009 @ 5:29PM


This is some funny shit, Grundy! HA!

McD
Response:

Suspensions

BY:
Dec 15th, 2009 @ 9:54PM


I saw the thread on creating \"The Two Suspension Rule\" and although this would be good for things like fighting, I feel as it\'s a little tough on other infractions. I think the key is that the officials learn the proper rules and there interpretations. For instance in the Whalers @ Dead River game the commissioners are looking into the possibility of additional suspensions. This wouldn\'t be necessary if the actual rule violations where assessed. Full disclosure, I was not at the game, I\'m just going by the referees report. I\'m in no way blaming the officials for anything, I\'m just going over the rules, there interpretations and showing how if we just applied them, there wouldn\'t be a need for additional help.

Duggan:

2 - Body Checking
2 - Instigating
5 - Fisticuffs
10 - Game Misconduct (613 A) Minimum One Game Suspension
10 - Game Misconduct (613 F) Minimum One Game Suspension
10 - Game Misconduct (603 B) Minimum Two Game Suspension

Rules call for minimum of 4 game suspension.

If Gill was involved in the Altercation:

2 - Roughing or Delay of Game
10 - Game Misconduct (613 D)

Rules call for One Game Suspension.

Ledger:

5 - Fisticuffs
5 - Fisticuffs
10 - Game Misconduct (613 A) Minimum One Game Suspension
10 - Game Misconduct (613 F) Minimum One Game Suspension

Rules call for minimum 2 game suspension.

3 Man power play for whales - 2 Minutes
4 Man power play for whalers - additional 2 minutes

During a man down faceoff in his own zone, I watched Duggan flip Leger to the ice as the puck dropped, we saw this and called the same penalty. Dead River killed off the penalties, on an ensuing shift, I saw Duggan from the blueline, come from behind his own net and line up Leger in the corner and put a heavy body check on Leger in corner. (2 Duggan Body Contact) We both raised our hands to indicate a penalty, I saw Leger verbalizing to Duggan, Duggan pushed Leger and a fight broke out. (Duggan 2 [Body Contact] 2 [Instigator] + 5 + GM [613A] + Game Misconduct [613 F] (Two Game Misconducts)| Ledger 5+ GM [613 A] + Game Misconduct [613 F] ), FightingBoth players helmets had been removed and I could see that punches had been landed by both players and both players were bleeding. We conferred at the scorekeeper\'s bench and agreed that because punches were thrown that both players were to be given 5 minute majors and misconducts, and that we both had seen the initial infraction for the bodycheck at the beggining. Dean and Stu from Dead River didn\'t argue at all, we informed them of the call and infraction and they immediately put a player in the box to serve the minor roughing penalty. We conferred again before our games started and were very conscientious and concerned about making the right call. We both agreed that we had made it correctly. My ref partner also stated that he saw a look in Duggan\'s eyes that alarmed him. (Possible Match for Attempt to Injure?)

Penalty Clock:
Whalers ----
Dead River 2,4

Thoughts?
Response:

Judgement calls

BY: hkydoc
Dec 16th, 2009 @ 10:08AM


Nice post. Very detailed and thoughtful. Thanks.

Most of the calls and non-calls are referee judgements on body contact, tripping, interference, etc. We try to let things go evenly without it getting out of hand. Duggan got out of hand in that game. Could it have been prevented? Maybe. That's hockey. We want to protect players, but they are never happy how the game is called. If we call it tight, they bitch. If we call it too loose, they bitch. Can we all get better as refs each and every week?

Players should know better and need to be acountable for their on-ice actions. As comissioners we need to protect the players if there is a history of flagrant fouls, dirty play, etc. We are watching several players on several teams, and if they screw up again they will be heavily suspended, or they will be kicked out for the remainder of the season without refund (read your UVHL waiver: NO REFUND).

Duggan got lucky because his 5th penalty was a game misconduct, and in USA Hockey a 5th penalty comes with a game suspension. However, due to the technicality that the 4th penalty already kicked him out he does not get double suspended per USA Hockey rules. You are incorrect about an instigator penalty while listing his infractions for the game. This is instituted by the league as of this week only, not retroactive. If Leger ws hurt more than he was in the tussle, the league would have stepped in with additional suspensions. We conferred with the refs and they were confident of their call and assessment.

Thanks for your input, it is greatly appreciated!

McD
Response:

Crowson and Kenning co-POW\'s for Dec. 15th

BY: hkydoc
Dec 16th, 2009 @ 9:55AM


The voting was all over the board, both had over 400 votes cast EACH between both polls, and my decision is that neither group of crazy fans, parents, friends, co-workers, alumni, groupies or stalkers should be denied.

This was a very interesting poll, since Kenning and Crowson are both goalies skating out, but Kenning was in between the pipes for this game. Each skater-goaie had a memorable night, and that deserves to be recognized. Nice game to each of you!

Enjoy the case of beer, boys!

McD
Response:

King Solomon

BY: bayley
Dec 16th, 2009 @ 10:17AM


Solid decision McD.

But I say you employ the teachings of King Solomon and decide to cut the beer in half. Only the true player of the week would rather see the Long Trail handed over to another, than see it harmed.




Response:

Grasshopper

BY: rgrunds
Dec 17th, 2009 @ 8:33AM


you show deep wisdom. You consult with monk Marshy?

K. Fu
Response:

Precisely grasshopper

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 18th, 2009 @ 2:16PM


Two things are sacred to those of us from ONT, CANADA Grundy...
BEER and HOCKEY! There are others, but those two go together SO WELL
Crass DIsmissed....OK USA!!!
Response:

It was a good one

BY: kpark
Dec 16th, 2009 @ 11:41AM


That game was a blast. Clean, fast paced & great goaltending at both ends.

Nice Job Turner & Kenning.

KP
Response:

Kenning AGAIN?

BY: hkydoc
Dec 16th, 2009 @ 5:24PM


Wow, sorry I had to miss it. Steve Kenning and JT in a goalie battle, another shootout, and the result I predicted between two classy teams!

McD
Response:

Greg Feisen SHUTOUT in UVHL debut!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 16th, 2009 @ 5:26PM


I wish I coulda seen it!

McD
Response:

Another close one...

BY: hkydoc
Dec 16th, 2009 @ 5:27PM


This must have been a good game, esp. with the Whalers scoring 5 goals. Nice job, boys! Sorry I had to miss it, eh.

McD
Response:

JOEY HAYES SIGHTING!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 16th, 2009 @ 5:34PM


Joey is back for the Whalers, and I missed it! Welcome back, Joe - we missed ya.

McD
Response:

Great game write-up, boys!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 17th, 2009 @ 10:54PM


Nice tag team Park and McGov! Funny, entertaining, and very descriptive. I give it an A-!

Okay, gotta go...I'm smothered in Bleu Cheese...

McD
Response:

too much info

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 18th, 2009 @ 2:11PM


smothered in Bleu really grosses me out Mc D...unless it was either a celery spear or a hot n' tasty chickky wing. Nice job on the write-up boys...that line about me chugging up the ice, then collapsing in a heap in the corner was definitely funny...Looking forward to the re-match fellas!
Response:

Nice job on the recap!

BY: jt
Dec 19th, 2009 @ 9:16AM


The write up for this game is great! I laughed, cried and was well informed!

Thanks Kelly and McGov
Response:

Shutout Debut!

BY: jt
Dec 19th, 2009 @ 9:22AM


Nice job Greg! I love the yellow pads. Shutouts are rare especially in your first game.
Response:

JT, can I have some of your beer

BY: rgrunds
Dec 24th, 2009 @ 2:23PM


I voted for you.

ES
Response:

You didn't answer

BY: rgrunds
Dec 30th, 2009 @ 9:25AM


can I have some of your beer? I'll vote for you every week.
Response:

beer is so good

BY: rgrunds
Dec 31st, 2009 @ 3:55PM


John...I like beer.
Response:

For you Grundy?

BY: jt
Jan 2nd, 2010 @ 10:04PM


Of course! We will have a party in the summer with cold beers. Until then, I will buy you one on your next visit.

thanks,

JT
Response:

I feel better now/ can I be POW sometime

BY: rgrunds
Jan 4th, 2010 @ 11:18AM


Mmmm. Beer is good.

Can I be POW sometime? I could be voted as the best informed and funny mascot.

ES
Response:

Yeah!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 28th, 2009 @ 7:17PM


Have fun out there, Boys! We're excited to have an interleague scrimmage tomorrow night!

Send us some trash talk, eh!

McD

P.S. The UVHL is way better than the CSEHL! Nah na na na na na!
Response:

Whalers......

BY: kpark
Dec 29th, 2009 @ 9:28AM


Having a week off from the UVHL is depressing, I can't wait to get into action tonight. This should be a good one, the Whale & Nords always seem to play a close game.

KP
Response:

Whalers.....

BY: Schlavel
Dec 29th, 2009 @ 11:47AM


Watch out Park Big Win for the Whalers tonight.
Response:

REALLY McD?!?!?

BY: kpark
Jan 5th, 2010 @ 7:01AM


Get the writeup done or else I'm erasing the crappy one paragraph you have in there and I'll start NUDGING you all day long.
Response:

Vermont Pond Hockey Tournament - sign up by 1/2/10

BY: LiamFM
Dec 30th, 2009 @ 7:23AM


Hey guys - want to have some fun AND drink a few beers? Okemo is hosting the first annual Labatt Blue Vermont Pond Hockey Tournament on 1/9/10. Teams of 4 will compete for a spot in the regional tournament (complete with lodging in Buffalo, NY) and a chance to go on to the nationals.

Find out all the details and register online at www.okemo.com/hockey

Thanks,
LIam
Response:

Are YOU playing?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 30th, 2009 @ 2:42PM


Just checked out the info on the tourney Oliver...Seems as though they don't allow a few things:
1. Spearing
2. Slew-footing
3. Elbowing

So, I guess you're out. People around the league are fed up with your bullshit Oliver. If I weighed anywhere close to your 110-lb frame, I'd knock the shit out of you. Clean up your game you little weasel...
Response:

Marshy!

BY: kpark
Dec 30th, 2009 @ 9:22PM


Too funny Marsh. This is a different Liam, not the WEASEL! Liam Fracht-Monroe.

I think I'm traveling this weekend, but maybe I can move some things around! Sounds like a hell of a tourney.

Kelly
Response:

Apologies to Liam Fracht-Monroe

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 31st, 2009 @ 12:41PM


Sorry for the mix-up...the REAL weasel knows who he is!
HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL!!!!
Response:

Reffing

BY: vtdownhiller
Jan 1st, 2010 @ 10:03AM


Liam, get in touch with me about details for me about reffing the tourney for you. I hadn't realized until now that it was next week and I have no clue where to go. Thanks.
Response:

Reffing

BY: LiamFM
Jan 2nd, 2010 @ 10:59AM


Yeah, I'll be in touch with you on Tuesday for sure.
Response:

Thanks Kelly

BY: LiamFM
Jan 2nd, 2010 @ 11:00AM


I wondered exactly what I had done wrong. Canuck, get you're Liam's right! And tell me who this other Liam is ruining my good name. I'll throw a hip check next time I see him.
Response:

Marshy ..

BY: Z-Skate
Jan 4th, 2010 @ 9:05AM


You need someone to pick on someone come knocking on my door .. Liam may have been a real pain in the ass in the past but this year outside of a few infractions - He has been pretty good. Maybe you should look inside your team and see what you're playing with ..
1.) Park will slash anyone that gets w/in his 2 ft. bubble b/c he is afraid his knee will swell up.
2.) How about that gun-totting forest ranger on your team that A.) can't skate and B.)just cross checks everyone in front of the net .. of wait everyone that JT doesn't step up and hit just because
3.) Mr. Marshy you had what 2 good slashes on me and a high stick on Shaw.
4.) How does JT sustify slashing Scotty Shaw b/c he thought it was Liam .. That's unacceptable and nothign will be done b/c he is a commissioner or some shit like that ..
This doesn't seem like a very clean team ..

So before you go getting all "big chested" on Liam look around you buddy - The nords. aren't helping the matter of clean hockey.

Yes, I hit (ran over) your captain only after he slashed me in the slot and there was no call. Was it right, no.
Response:

REALLY?

BY: kpark
Jan 4th, 2010 @ 9:35AM


I know this isn't really the thread to be using as a sounding board for league issues, since it is to promote a killer pond hockey event, but I'm going to anyways.

Big Z....Did it ever make you think that maybe that little shit is setting the tone for the game? In his first couple of shifts he speared / hooked me in the ribs, slew footed another defenseman and cross checked our goaltender. PISSING EVERYONE OFF and making them play more aggressively.

I don't think we've had any complaints about the Nordiques being a cheap team, and you could be right, they may feel like it is a hopeless cause to bitch about the commissioners team. If there are any issues, I would love to discuss them, but I feel that the Nords usually play a clean game.

Your claims:

1.) Park slashes - Really? I honestly don't think I've slashed anyone in this league except Oliver. Giving a nice tug or full blown hook is another thing and I will gladly take my penalty on those. Personally I hope that was just busting balls on your end.
2.) The Forest Ranger plays just like you do, he plays physical, which I have no problem with, it is a contact (non-checking) league. I haven't seen him cross check anyone in front of the net, but I could be missing something, I usually am.
3.) Marshy slashing, yes, I've seen that and he can't help it, he's a butcher, but we are working with him on this, I promise. As for the Shaw thing, I was right there on the faceoff, Scotty took Marshy's hands, they were both turning and got tangled as the puck went right past both of them, both of their sticks came up and Scotty went down. It wasn't intentional, more or less what happens when two guys are fighting for the puck.
4.) I know JT felt bad about Scotty, I didn't see that one, I don't know how bad it was, but you are right, if it was that bad, it should have had some ramifications. Nobody but Turner saw it.
5.) "Yes, I hit(ran over) your captain only after he slashed me in the slot and there was no call." BULLSHIT, I talked to one of your team mates that said you told your bench you were going to lay someone out that shift.

Again, YOU DON'T PLAY AGAINST OLIVER, as commissioners we have had more complaints about him than any other player in the league, and trust me, there have been a few gems out there.

We are going to have a chat with all of the refs and make sure that they are calling the games a bit tighter from now on. As commissioners, we are fucked either way. We tried letting the teams just play, not calling every infraction, but guys complain about that, we have the refs call it tighter, and we get complaints about too many penalties. I am seriously offended by anyone who thinks the refs are calling games any differently for the Nordiques, I think that is horseshit and a weak excuse. As a ref out there, I'm more worried and focused about just making the correct call, than whether or not who it's on. There's a lot going on out there, a ton to process as a ref, and to imply that the refs are showing favoritism is horseshit and a cop out, especially if a call doesn't go your way. Not to mention an insult to every ref in the league.

Z, you should know better, that you can't see everything on the ice, and if you start to make calls on assumptions of something that you didn't fully see, you'll get yourself in more trouble.

KP


Response:

Isn't this sounding board all about busting chops .. It's online locker room talk, no?

BY: Z-Skate
Jan 4th, 2010 @ 10:04AM


I beleive I said something to the effect of "fuck I would like to hit every guy who cuts to the middle of the ice w/ his head down"

I wasn't blaming the refs for anything .. but everyone in the league expects Oliver to be cheap and everything he does is hyper-analyzed (is that a word) .. and NOTHING is called in his favor b/c refs feel/think it's Olilver that little weasel he deserves it but I am not blaming the refs b/c I know first hand it's hard to ref a bunch of grown toddles (myself included)

Mr. Park - A spear and a hook are totally different animals. I also think an Oliver hook is elevated b/c of his pervious play .. I didn't see the slew foot, nor the cross-check on JT which was probably just a bump b/c goalies are like fishermen they tend to embelish ..

KP do you fish? haha
Response:

I am floored

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 4th, 2010 @ 3:53PM


Z...seriously. OLIVER IS A SHIT DISTURBER!!! That's all I am saying. As much as anyone hates to admit it, Park is right also. Oliver's "behind the scenes" B.S cheap-shots affect EVERYONE. It makes everyone play more aggressive. JT said after our game, that Oliver is a good hockey player as afar as skills go, there is really no need for him to do what he does. And if he does, he should expect to get it back. As for me getting all BIG-chested, I feel no need to act like that...especially towards a little shit like Oliver. Also, if there's ever a time you feel the need to cross paths with me out there, you had better hope it's clean. I can take a hit, and get right back up...Oh, and one more thing; the high-stick on Shaw was accidental, and I stopped skating right away and apologized.

Can't we all just..."Get Along"?
Response:

hmmm

BY: Z-Skate
Jan 4th, 2010 @ 5:36PM


Yes, we can get along heck I will give you a big kiss .. haha. I just feel everyone blows this Oliver thing way out of proportion but he is my teammate so I may not see everything. I never said the high-stick was deliberate.

Clean .. do I do anything that's not clean?? haha
Response:

Great exhibition game!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 31st, 2009 @ 10:59AM


Fun game to ref, great game to watch, and nice job by the Chiefs for making the trip in wind and freezing rain. I hope we can do it again soon, eh!

McD
Response:

Chiefs-Dead River game write-up is posted under DR-Tuck, eh!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 31st, 2009 @ 11:02AM


I hope you enjoy it and give us some feedback. Thanks to the Chiefs for making the trip in bad weather! We\'re looking forward to doing this again.

McD
Response:

No one cares

BY: rgrunds
Jan 13th, 2010 @ 11:45AM


Any responses to your helpful message?

No.
Response:

Ice Cretins

BY: rgrunds
Dec 31st, 2009 @ 8:12PM


Didn\'t yo mams teach you no manners?

Marshy\'s did.

Ya\'ll be cool on the holidays.

And remember, a paranoid is a person with good information.

Peaceniggasout
Response:

REALLY?!

BY: kpark
Jan 5th, 2010 @ 6:59AM


McD!!!! That was the fucking write-up? AWEFUL. One paragraph?!?!
Response:

Quit yer bitchin!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 5th, 2010 @ 2:39PM


Shut up and play hockey! Keep it clean and have some fun, for fuck's sake!!!

McD
Response:

Get ready for the upset

BY: hkydoc
Jan 5th, 2010 @ 2:40PM


Nords 4, Gamblers 3...maybe in overtime! GO NORDS!

McD
Response:

Yacey or Kenning tonight?

BY: hkydoc
Jan 5th, 2010 @ 2:41PM


Who will be in net, and will it even matter?

McD
Response:

BY: McG
Jan 5th, 2010 @ 2:58PM


Yace left the ice first during the morning skate, so it might be him. Or it might be Kenning, or maybe me.
Response:

Twonhouse/Condo for Sale in Wilder, VT

BY: Z-Skate
Jan 8th, 2010 @ 12:25PM


Boys -

I thought I would put this out there just to maybe help get the word out .. I am looking to sell a townhouse in Wilder, VT for $115,000 or rent it for $975/month, lease length is negotiable.

Response:

Details

BY: rgrunds
Jan 8th, 2010 @ 12:56PM


Hi Jay,

will you carry any paper? What is the square footage and maintenance fee? What is the board like?

thanks,

Bob Grundstein
802-851-1120
Response:

BY: Z-Skate
Jan 8th, 2010 @ 1:14PM


Probably wouldn't want to carry an paper but never really discussed it w/ my better-half. The place is 1,100 sq. ft. not including a 120 sg. ft deck (brand new), Dues are $160/mo and the bpard is super laid back almost none exsistent. It's a small association 9 units, very quiet and chill.
Response:

Maintenance fees

BY: rgrunds
Jan 8th, 2010 @ 1:51PM


What do the maintenance fees include?

Can you call me? Real estate is part of my business. I'm an attorney and have some questions.

My number is 802-851-1120

Bob Grundstein
rgrunds@pshift.com
Response:

Development

BY: rgrunds
Jan 8th, 2010 @ 2:30PM


Can you tell me the name of the condo?

Thanks,

BG
Response:

Development

BY: rgrunds
Jan 8th, 2010 @ 2:30PM


Can you tell me the name of the condo?

Thanks,

BG
Response:

Condo

BY: Z-Skate
Feb 4th, 2010 @ 11:34AM


BG - The condo will be rented for awhile so it's currently off the market. I will let you know when it changes .. thanks for the interest.
Response:

J.Turner/POW

BY: rgrunds
Jan 11th, 2010 @ 7:13AM


he\'s really good. Plus, he has beer.
Response:

WEAK

BY: kpark
Jan 11th, 2010 @ 5:43PM


McDermott, YOU SUCK AT THE WRITE-UPS.
Response:

McDermot, you suck

BY: kpark
Jan 11th, 2010 @ 5:44PM


Really McDermott?!?!?! WTF. You are an embarrassment to a commissioner for these bullshit write-ups 6 days after the game.
Response:

McDermott is a joke

BY: kpark
Jan 11th, 2010 @ 5:44PM


one paragraph for a game recap?!?!?! REALLY? WOW!
Response:

Calling Out McDermott!!!!

BY: kpark
Jan 12th, 2010 @ 8:37AM


Really Shawn! 7 days after last weeks games and you still don\'t have the game recaps finished! No pre-game reports, no odds, no nothing.

You have a SERIOUS porn addiction, and it\'s affecting your ability to do your job as a commissioner. Please show up early tonight so that we can have an intervention and discuss how your addiction is affecting the rest of us. We all just want the Shawn that CARES about the Upper Valley Hockey League back.

KP
Response:

Guilty as charged...

BY: hkydoc
Jan 12th, 2010 @ 1:10PM


I apologise for both my actions and inactions... But seriously, I feel like I have been wasting my time and that nobody reads our stuff anymore. There is such a lack of comments and responses from all but a handfull of UVHLers that I wonder if we are just too hockey crazy and nobody else gives a shit. I hope to be proven wrong... My bad.

McD
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Jan 12th, 2010 @ 1:32PM


I enjoy reading all the bullshit you write
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Jan 14th, 2010 @ 2:29PM


Keep up the good work! Your time's not wasted on me.
Response:

Don't let that bad man upset you

BY: rgrunds
Jan 14th, 2010 @ 4:13PM


Problem is, nothing in life is equal.

As a commissioners McChomp, Shelly and presumably JT (parenthetically and wishfully) will always do more than anyone else to maintain the persona and quality of the league. It's like being a parent, you do the right thing to support your creation and ask for little in return with the hope that they don't hate you for some obscure reason, later. The commissioners will ALWAYS end up doing a disproportionate amount for almost no recognition.

Kelly just donated about $3K worth of website, McD does write ups and JT is really active being fey and invisible.

So, with that in mind, it's legitimate to revise an approach to the game write-ups. Why overwork when it's not necessary? I think the pre-games should be minimal projections based on the characteristics of the teams involved. About like they are now. In conjunction with the over under and projected margin of victories, there's not a reason for a lot of prose.

The write ups themselves don't need to include all the info in the box scores. Why list the scoring/penalized players and their nick-names in the write-up when that info is in the box score? The write ups could be a short description of the game based on practiced strategies and the nature of each team's strengths and weaknesses.

The writer has to stay for three games then compose material. The writing alone can take 4-8 hours.

Why over-extend a gratuitous act? Make it easier for the people who do everything to begin with.

Actually, the pre-game report could be axed. The over-under and projected margin of victory could be enough.
Response:

I agree

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 15th, 2010 @ 2:06PM


Not too short, but sweet works. I understand there is a time factor involved, but I'm sure there is more people than you think that read the write-ups. The fact most people don't share on the website kinda blows, but hopefully as the league continues to grow, more will share. I for one think the write-ups can be delegated to those who may want to take a turn for a week and do them themselves. I would volunteer to stay all three games and do a write-up for each in a timely manner. It wouldn't be much, but the game would be described the best I could...with a few bits of hilarity thrown in...Just an idea. Waddayathink?
Response:

Good Luck

BY: rgrunds
Jan 16th, 2010 @ 9:24AM


As you noticed when you had to do them Big Boy, the write ups take time. People aren't lining up to do them.

Too bad, because there is a lot of variety and originality among the players. The guy who did the write-ups a couple weeks ago was hilarious. The bit about Hays-Bates confusion was really funny.

JT is also good and understands the game from a goalie's perspective.

Good luck getting volunteers. It would be nice.

ES
Response:

Write-ups Rule!

BY: jt
Jan 18th, 2010 @ 4:49AM


Shawn & Kelly I know I speak for a lot of players in saying the write ups are great! You put pressure on yourself(ves) to make them different and thoughtful. I was traveling last week and it was so nice to login and read about an amazing week of hockey. The Whale rules!!!! It must have been a great game. I read the forum and write ups every week even if I don't comment. We have had two guest writers in seven seasons, so good luck on the volunteers. I am happy to help when I can. Commish is a lonely place where bitching outweighs praise. Just know that without you two, there would be 90 players looking for an outlet and one goalie moving away!
Response:

Write-ups Rule!

BY: jt
Jan 18th, 2010 @ 4:49AM


Shawn & Kelly I know I speak for a lot of players in saying the write ups are great! You put pressure on yourself(ves) to make them different and thoughtful. I was traveling last week and it was so nice to login and read about an amazing week of hockey. The Whale rules!!!! It must have been a great game. I read the forum and write ups every week even if I don't comment. We have had two guest writers in seven seasons, so good luck on the volunteers. I am happy to help when I can. Commish is a lonely place where bitching outweighs praise. Just know that without you two, there would be 90 players looking for an outlet and one goalie moving away!
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Jan 12th, 2010 @ 1:09PM


Im gonna make you my bitch tonight Hadley
Response:

Crowson

BY: rgrunds
Jan 12th, 2010 @ 3:07PM


I coulda played....it's fun.....

plus, you have beer there.

ES
Response:

Grundy....

BY: kpark
Jan 14th, 2010 @ 8:52AM


Yes Grundy, you could have filled in between the pipes for us, but we took a poll from our team, and the majority said that they wanted a GOALIE in net.

Sorry.

KP
Response:

Did you know the name "Kelly"

BY: rgrunds
Jan 14th, 2010 @ 3:40PM


comes from the traditional Gaelic root meaning "dog vomit-squirrel anus"?

Yes, it's true.

You'll see. I'm gonna get my chance....
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Jan 15th, 2010 @ 6:07AM


sorry Grundy the womans C division already have their goalie tryouts
Response:

! !

BY: rgrunds
Jan 15th, 2010 @ 12:17PM


THIS, is why I don't like white people.

SK8, you must endure a searing and appropriate penalty:

Your punishment is to play goal for the Nords and face 55 shots (they always reduce the number to 40 or 45), half of which will be from the slot, on screened tip ins (screened and tipped by your own team) or on breakaways after the defense has overcommitted to the neutral zone. It will be your lot to watch the Nords defense get spun around and have to chase the opposing team into their own end after the opposition has appropriated the scoring zone and taken 2-3 shots.
It will be your fate to watch your defense skate into position AFTER the offense has scored...time after time..

You won't like it. But, you made your choices...
Response:

Some things never change

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 15th, 2010 @ 1:58PM


Listen Bob...when are you gonna just admit you had a bad game? We all know that it was a huge jump playing in the UVHL, coming from the S.O.D.L..also known as the Special Olympic Developmental League. Without your drool towel, and constant reassurance from your life-coach that you ARE good enough, and smart enough, and DOGGONE-IT people like you! The fact you keep deflecting the blame from yourself makes you look even worse. Granted there probably WERE a few bad goals that weren't your fault...but the other 9 WERE YOUR FAULT!!! NO BIG DEAL GRUNDS!!!! Let it GOOOOOOO. Your chance will come again someday, and when the Woodstock mites come a knockin', answer the bell, that MAY be your ticket back to the BIG TIME ol' Grundy boy!
Response:

LEAVE my towel out of this

BY: rgrunds
Jan 15th, 2010 @ 2:05PM


Have a little honor...Jesus.

show some restraint...


do your best
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Jan 15th, 2010 @ 3:11PM


it was a joke grundy..calm ur tits
Response:

I know

BY: rgrunds
Jan 15th, 2010 @ 3:25PM


it's O.K. Stop looking at my tits.

It's just the style of the forum. Everyone likes aggressive humor.

Don't worry. I like your retard, too.

More, please. Make McD happy.
Response:

confused

BY: rgrunds
Jan 13th, 2010 @ 11:54AM


please explain


if the game was a shootout and the only goal scored was against the Gamblers, didn't the Whalers win?



Response:

My bad!

BY: kpark
Jan 14th, 2010 @ 8:54AM


Fixed. I think I had a mental block about the Whalers actually winning a game in a shootout, not to mention against the Gamblers.

I picked the Gamblers to win this one too....UGH. My Pick 'em percentage is dropping every week.

KP
Response:

So is your plus minus...

BY: hkydoc
Jan 15th, 2010 @ 8:48PM


Crash and burn!

McD
Response:

Then Lallier

BY: rgrunds
Jan 13th, 2010 @ 11:58AM


would be strong candidate for POW

(after me and JT, who has beer)
Response:

Stick Offenses...

BY: Garrentee
Jan 13th, 2010 @ 8:45PM


I guess I showed you McD!!
Response:

Huh?

BY: kpark
Jan 14th, 2010 @ 8:53AM


Garren, what did you show him? You showed him your stick? DISGUSTING.

KP
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Jan 14th, 2010 @ 2:32PM


McD does say he thinks Garren has some talented stickwork, and has also stated that he would like him to keep it down...hmmm you have me wondering here
Response:

HA!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 15th, 2010 @ 8:47PM


I sit corrected, Garren...for one night! Nice game, eh!

Tuck is a class act, aren't they? Gattie and Z do a solid job, too.

McD
Response:

Good one park...

BY: Garrentee
Jan 14th, 2010 @ 10:10AM


Wow that was a zinger there parky!!


I wanted to go ahead and say this game was the way UVHL hockey is supposed to be played. No whining, great Refs, and a complete and total respect for each others teams. I respect Tuck a lot, everyone on there team plays hockey and doesnt whine about a little stick check here or there (its part of the game). My hat goes off to Tuck and the Brew Crew as they are two class squads!!

Garrentee
Response:

Kelly!!

BY: rgrunds
Jan 14th, 2010 @ 4:18PM


you skate like brood cow on quaaludes.

Can you turn your vibrating egg to \"off\" for games?


ES
Response:

"a" brood cow

BY: rgrunds
Jan 14th, 2010 @ 4:52PM


you skate like A brood cow on Quaaludes...

Yeah...articles of speech count...
Response:

Grundy....

BY: kpark
Jan 19th, 2010 @ 11:38AM


I've seen better goaltending from a broken condom than you between the pipes in a mite game.

Oh, rumor has it, you were that broken condom.....HARSH! That was way out of line. I would like to recant that last statement. Actually I will just delete it....crap I just hit enter. Sorry.
Response:

Ooooo

BY: rgrunds
Jan 19th, 2010 @ 11:56AM


Are you posting again without my permission? I thought I made the conditions clear....

Ooooh...I'm so injured. Ooooh.. I'll never play again...Ooooooh

bwah...

"You'll never break, this heart of stone.." (M. Jagger)
Response:

what?

BY: kpark
Jan 19th, 2010 @ 11:58AM


What are you talking about. Who's injured? Who'll never play again?

Grundy, lay off the crack for 2 seconds and write one sentence that actually makes sense or has some logic behind it.

I did like the Mick Jagger quote though!
Response:

O.K. I'll explain

BY: rgrunds
Jan 19th, 2010 @ 12:03PM


You made a critical remark;

I made a sarcastic reply in response to it.

Does that help? Go slow. Take your time.

We'll try some concepts later....

Who's "Timmy"?
Response:

I'm touched

BY: hkydoc
Jan 15th, 2010 @ 8:45PM


You guys care! You really DO care! All 6 of you... But it still means a lot.

McD
Response:

McD

BY: rgrunds
Jan 15th, 2010 @ 9:18PM


down boi. Back to your harem of small, nude boys.

Can you take care of those stains on the ceiling?
Response:

Tuck\'s Halsey Coughlin wins Jan. 5th POW!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 15th, 2010 @ 9:00PM


Coughlin had 76 votes for his 3 goal and shootout winner performance against the Whalers. Dan Ammel came in sceond with 24 votes. Enjoy the beer, Tuckies!

McD
Response:

Halsey

BY: rgrunds
Jan 16th, 2010 @ 6:42AM


beer is delicious.

I re-thought everything and decided JT wasn't as good as you this week.

My mistake.
Response:

WOAH!!!

BY: kpark
Jan 19th, 2010 @ 9:07AM


McDermott, From your write-up "First off, kudos to Evan Duggan who scored a beauty 1-on-4 individual effort and roasted me in the process making me look like a fat buffalo and bleu cheese stained pylon along with 3 three other Nords who got beat. Nice goal!"

Yes, it was a beauty, and it was a perfect coast to coast, but the only one he turned inside out was you! Yes, there were 3 other Nords in the vicinity, but he walked right through you like a hot knife through blue cheese as everyone was in awe of how aweful you looked.

KP
Response:

OUCH!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 19th, 2010 @ 10:23AM


Okay, okay...guilty as charged! FUCK! Can't I even make it sound better for myself just a little bit? I thought I was generous enough with the self-depricating comments...

McD

Response:

Not only that

BY: rgrunds
Jan 19th, 2010 @ 11:41AM


but you spelled self-deprecating wrong.

Get a grip, Bunkie. Next thing you know you'll be eating your salad in Montreal with the wrong fork.
Response:

BIG GAME TONIGHT!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 19th, 2010 @ 10:18AM


This is my favorite UVHL opponent, it is always a great battle and a good game, and I'm looking forward to it! Bring your A-game, Brew Crew, I love the challenge.

McD
Response:

Don't go glove side...

BY: hkydoc
Jan 19th, 2010 @ 10:19AM


Both goalies have GREAT gloves, so whoever penetrates the 5-hole the most could win... Good luck to both squads!

McD
Response:

Goalie duel?

BY: hkydoc
Jan 19th, 2010 @ 10:20AM


Wow, Yacey vs. Feiden. Interesting... This is gonna be a good one!

McD
Response:

BY: McG
Jan 19th, 2010 @ 12:07PM


Roster update: Kenning vs. Feiden
Response:

Goalies ..

BY: Z-Skate
Jan 19th, 2010 @ 10:34AM


Who are the goalies .. b/c I know Kenny is out.
Response:

Why is Le Lallier out?

BY: kpark
Jan 19th, 2010 @ 11:28AM


What happened to Kenny? McD, you love to penetrate the 5-hole on guys.....pig.
Response:

Yes, this is true...

BY: hkydoc
Jan 19th, 2010 @ 11:49AM


My tape-to-tape passes often find themselves going right through the 5-hole of unsuspecting forwards!

McD
Response:

Game Predictions.

BY: kpark
Jan 19th, 2010 @ 11:29AM


I have absolutely NO IDEA how this game is going to end up....but here are a couple of things that I do know.

1. Bartline will still be a virgin after the game, unless Marshy gets him behind the net for 30 seconds.
2. McDermott WILL NOT SCORE.
3. Poirier will take at LEAST 2 penalties
4. Bayley will touch himself no less than 39 times on the bench.
5. Turner will slash or forearm shiver someone.
6. I will turn the puck over no less than 8 times.
7. Charette will have a medical kit on the bench with 2 gallons of Ben & Jerry's and 4 Baby Ruths in it.
8. Chris Johnson WILL only remember his personal highlights after the game.
9. Jordy McGee will score on ZERO percent of his 9 breakaways
10. O'Neil will stay on the perimeter most of the game, not out of fear, but that is where he can get the best reflection of himself off the glass.
11. Marshy will be 3/4 baked.
12. Crapser will still be fat.
13. The Fonz will still be old.

I may think of some other guarantees in this one, but I'm out of time for now.
Response:

Fucking HILARIOUS, Park!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 19th, 2010 @ 11:54AM


HA! Brilliant!

My favorite ones are about O'Neil's reflection and Bayley touching himself.

As far as the prediction about me goes...you are RIGHT! However, I WILL shut them down.

McDefense
Response:

Gamblers by 1 huh?

BY: kpark
Jan 19th, 2010 @ 11:35AM


This is a tough one to call. Early game for the Tuckies. Do they get all of their guys to show up for the early ones?

I know the Govenator injured himself on Sunday night, so that is a huge factor. I'm going with the Blers on this one, but it could go either way. I also heard the Danimal is injured too.


Response:

Oh yeah...

BY: hkydoc
Jan 19th, 2010 @ 11:47AM


Kenny is out for two weeks and has Timmy subbing in. He is a solid goalie and plays on K2 in the B league, and also plays Tues/Thurs mornings @ Campion, too. He is a solid, acrobatic goalie with good fundamentals.

McD
Response:

Lallier

BY: kpark
Jan 19th, 2010 @ 11:55AM


Is this a planned absence or an injury? He did double duty on Sunday night and was not psyched about it. Hope he didn't hurt himself in the later skate.

KP
Response:

Planned

BY: hkydoc
Jan 19th, 2010 @ 12:00PM


Vacation as I understand it. Kenny played well in Sunday's double-header, no injuries.

McD
Response:

Of course Mcd would like bailey touching himself!!

BY: Garrentee
Jan 19th, 2010 @ 11:57AM


Classic!!

I plan on getting three parky...one is gonna be a slash on you bad ankle.

G
Response:

Gaaaarrreeeeennnnnn

BY: kpark
Jan 19th, 2010 @ 12:24PM


Can you make it my good ankle tonight instead? You are especially angry this year though, so maybe I should bump up your over under on penalty minutes to 7 for tonight!

I was just checking out the stats for the year, and you've already eclipsed your previous high for PIMs in a season, and we are only half way through!

If you would like, McDermott said he'd give you a rub down before the game to release any tension & anger.

KP
Response:

Good game, eh.

BY: hkydoc
Jan 19th, 2010 @ 11:27PM


We lost...but played much better against the Brewers than in the first two contests this season. Down 4-1 we came back and made it 4-3, pulled the goalie and gave up an empty netter. I'm proud of the Nords for coming back and making it close! The Brewers played well and it was a fun, competitive game. Nice job, boys.

McD

Response:

Great writeup!

BY: kpark
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 9:13AM


Nicely done McD! Very enjoyable.

KP
Response:

Class act

BY: hkydoc
Jan 19th, 2010 @ 11:29PM


Both teams were a class act tonight, and it needs to be recognized (and it is appreciated). Great game by both squads!

McD
Response:

Big comeback fo the Whale

BY: hkydoc
Jan 19th, 2010 @ 11:30PM


An even game until the last minute as I understand it. Hadley was sporting a 1-goal game for a long time, and his glove was hot (as usual). Pattison scored a beauty tuck-in goal to go up 2-1.

McD
Response:

It\'s Finally Here!

BY: kpark
Jan 21st, 2010 @ 2:27PM


Hey guys, I\'ve finally gotten to the My UVHL section, and rebuilt it from scratch. Some of the new features are:

1. You can link your Forum Account to your Player Profile, so that you can log in to both accounts through the My UVHL login.
2. \"Keep Me Logged In\" option when logging in. This will keep you logged in for 10 days after you log in.
3. Send Emails to your team mates, commissioners, or search for other players.
4. Easier to use Profile Photo Uploader & Cropper.

Some other features that I\'ll be adding in:
1. Digitally sign your Player Waiver each season.
2. Alerts & Notifications, for example if your name is mentioned in a Game Recap or Pre Game Report or if you have forgotten to select your Game Picks.
3. Players will be able to rate their referees each game.

To access your My UVHL account, use the drop down menu from the UVHL logo, or click on the My UVHL link at the bottom of every page.

Feel free to make any suggestions as to other features you would like in here.

Thanks,

Kelly
Response:

HOLY SHIT!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 21st, 2010 @ 6:05PM


Did you take the day off at Ibex to accomplish all this great stuff? Wow!

McD
Response:

Scott Shaw wins the Jan. 12th Player of the Week!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 21st, 2010 @ 6:03PM


Scott Shaw, a UVHL Rookie but Upper Valley hockey legend, scored the shootout winner on Jan 12th to lift the Whalers over the league leading Gamblers. Shaw won the POW for the week with 37 votes, and in second place was Tuck\'s D Andrew Helming with 24 votes.

Enjoy the Long Trail, eh!
Response:

I always knew it

BY: rgrunds
Jan 21st, 2010 @ 6:45PM


Scott, I always knew you were a sleeping giant. I'm not just saying this because you have beer.

I'd like to congratulate you in person.

Can I see your beer then, too?

ES
Response:

Final versions of the Jan. 19th game write-ups now posted

BY: hkydoc
Jan 24th, 2010 @ 11:51AM


Just finished and edited this very hour. Enjoy!

Thanks to all for a great first half. Kelly Park now takes the reigns for the remainder of the 2009-10 season. See you at Bentley\'s for post-game wings and a Bleu cheese bath!

McD
Response:

NEW RULE!

BY: kpark
Jan 25th, 2010 @ 1:15PM


Gentlemen...and ladies. We will be instilling a new rule in the UVHL this week. It will be in the UVHL handbook:

Rule #246a.12 aka \"The Mike O\'Neil Rule\"

No player, under any circumstance is allowed to stretch with the other team before a game is to start. If this sort of cross-team camaraderie is seen during warmups, it is punishable by 25 lashings or death, whichever the player so chooses. Each player is to refer to the other team as \"the enemy\" until post game beers are shared at Bentley\'s(Woodstock, VT) in celebration of manly sport...or womanly sport(Greg Hadley of Dead River).

Sincerely, the Commissioners
Response:

Really?

BY: kpark
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 9:14AM


No comments on this? REALLY?!?! Not even a chuckle? This makes me sad.
Response:

Ok, I'll bite

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 28th, 2010 @ 3:16PM


Park, you have nothing to say on this matter. I can't even count how many times our team has been in countless physical games, and player scuffles or whatever else that may gain some form of momentum, only to see you joking around with the other team, or going in their dressing room after the game, or chatting it up like schoolgirls after the game. I remember one game in particular against an unnamed team, and I had an altercation with that player, trying to get my team fired up, only to see you and him having a good chuckle between whistles while I was in the box. I like your idea of the other team being the enemy while we play. If they have that kind of edge, THEY win. From now on, be a COMPLETE ASSHOLE TO EVERYONE on the other team EVERY FUCKING SHIFT!!! I know you'll be more effective
Response:

Hmmmm

BY: kpark
Jan 28th, 2010 @ 3:53PM


Hey Marshy, way to take a funny thread completely written in jest and make it completely NOT funny.

You are a wet blanket.
Response:

kelly...

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 29th, 2010 @ 4:19PM


I am NOT a wet blanket...And frankly, I am hurt, once again...you just keep knockin me down...waaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Response:

No Love for the Whale ..

BY: Z-Skate
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 8:35AM


yes, we are in the basement but common'man .. I think we will pull another one out tonight as long as we don't let Scotty and Stevie start b/c that will guarantee a goal for the Brewcrew w/in 30 seconds.
Response:

Mad Love for the Whale!!!

BY: kpark
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 8:44AM


I have nothing but high expectations for the Whale....BUT, that being said, you are still in the basement and the Brewers have beaten you in both contests this season.

Although....you are 2-0-1 in your last 3. I may need to change my Pick 'em over to the Whale for tonight.

KP
Response:

Tuck 6-2

BY: Z-Skate
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 8:35AM


Need we say more .. haha
Response:

ok...

BY: kpark
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 8:40AM


You aren't allowed to ref this one Z !!!! Not with a prediction like that.
Response:

Tonight?

BY: kpark
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 8:39AM


Who is in net for the Turduckens tonight? Yacey, Kenning, some crossed sticks? Not that it matters, I couldn't score on a shooter-tutor right now, and both netminders are nasty.

Game Update....McGovern has retired his awful yellow melon protector and replaced it with very shiny black one. It's going to be a bit tougher to keep track of him on the ice.

This should be a good one.

KP
Response:

BY: McG
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 9:18AM


Yace will be making his first start in 2010 tonight, and Kenning's sidelined with a glove-hand wrist injury. I think he hurt it shaking his fist at Meyer last week.
Response:

Yacey

BY: JTStally
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 2:33PM


I'm positive Yacey played the first two games of 2010, perhaps you just forgot because you didn't think us Whalers could put up a four spot on him. Next time, we'll put up five.
Response:

wow ..

BY: Z-Skate
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 2:47PM


Did you just say that .. WOW !?
Response:

Prediction

BY: Z-Skate
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 8:44AM


I just thought I would get alittle chatter going .. I'm stick of looking at tax returns
Response:

Got ya.

BY: kpark
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 8:51AM


I was just typing in some comments to get the chatter going when yours popped up.
Response:

Sinking Ship...

BY: kpark
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 8:49AM


Can Dead River right their sinking ship? They definitely have the talent, but the chemistry seems to be an issue.

Thoughts?
Response:

I agree...

BY: hkydoc
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 1:19PM


Definitely a defensive battle tonight. I'm rrrrreaaaadyyy!

McD
Response:

I'm rrrrreaaaadyyy

BY: Z-Skate
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 2:11PM


McD - I thought you were just the pivot-man like maybe a men's league softball pitcher who plays for both sides ..
Response:

Yup

BY: kpark
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 2:27PM


You are correct there Z, McD does play for both sides. But usually bats for the pink team.

KP
Response:

HA HA HA HA!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 1:22PM


"mopped up like a porn booth in Montreal"

FUCKING BRILLIANT, Park!

McD
Response:

ahhhhh

BY: kpark
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 2:05PM


Thanks McD, I thought you would like that one! I wrote it with you in mind.

KP
Response:

STILL No Love for the Whale...

BY: JTStally
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 1:51PM


Too funny, I went to click on "Discussion" and said to myself "still no love for the whale," and look at Jay's post!

I agree with Jay, Kelly, you make it out to seem like our win over Dead River was an upset for the ages, when really it was the No. 6 team beating the No. 5 team, and we're within one point of DR. Might I remind you that the week before we held a lead over the Gamblers with less than a second left, and STILL prevailed in OT.

Also, as a defenseman, I take it personally that "if" the defense can play well, we're only expected to give up 5 or 6 goals. If that's considered playing well for us Whaler D, perhaps I should start skating on Thursdays instead.
Response:

last week ..

BY: Z-Skate
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 2:16PM


I am not saying last week was an epic win but being in the basement, when you win, you pull it off b/c you aren't expected to win.
Response:

Vermont Beers

BY: JTStally
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 1:54PM


Also, just for the record, I think Magic Hat makes a better brew than Long Trail.
Response:

STALLY!

BY: kpark
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 2:04PM


First things first, you may want to wear some extra padding tonight, there are a ton of Long Trail enthusiasts that may take exception to your last comment!

Secondly, consistency has never been the strong suit of the Whale. Especially late in games. Although, the mid-season addition of a TROJAN, seems to have had some sort of stimulating effect on a limp Whalers squad, filling their lifeless bodies with warm blood and looking to unload their shots in any open hole......get it, you were a Trojan?!?!? Lame, I know.

Thirdly, maybe I'm trying to light a fire under the Whaler's collective asses. Mad respect for the Whalers though, who have reversed the role from "Lovable Drunken Loosers just looking for some fun" to a "Talented & Competitive Hockey Team".

Response:

Dirty Kp .. dirty ..

BY: Z-Skate
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 2:18PM


I think you need to go release some .. thing?!


Response:

Magic Hat

BY: Z-Skate
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 2:19PM


Long Trail is to Magic Hat what Keystone is to Coors - The bottom of the basement.


Response:

Magic Hat

BY: kpark
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 2:27PM


Settle down ladies! Magic Hat gives me the shits!
Response:

..

BY: Z-Skate
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 2:28PM


No I think it's the blue cheese from McD's tongue giving you the shits ..

If I have a choice I would prefer Blue
Response:

Still Drinking

BY: JTStally
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 2:14PM


Oh, don't worry, I got exactly where you were going with that!

And, make no mistake, we still like to be lovable drunks, we just prefer to do so on Magic Hat or Switchback...not Long Trail :)
Response:

Size vs. Speed

BY: JTStally
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 2:24PM


It's a matchup like this where body checking will be sorely missed. DR is probably the biggest team in the league, while the Gamblers are certainly the fastest. You have to assume with Sean Avery taking over the whistle, the Oilers should be able to get away with some body work, but there's a limit and I'm sure DR will cross it tonight.
Response:

DR...they usually do

BY: kpark
Jan 26th, 2010 @ 2:29PM


Yeah, I'm not really looking forward to reffing this one. This is the typical situation of "I'm damned if I do....and I'm damned if I don't"

Z, do you want to stick around and ref this one?
Response:

J.T.

BY: rgrunds
Jan 27th, 2010 @ 11:16AM


I...I....I'm despondent.


How could this be? It must have been the defense.


Response:

J.T. Player of Week

BY: rgrunds
Jan 30th, 2010 @ 11:26AM


..\'cause after a game like that, he\'ll need people to be as nice to him as possible.

Response:

OUCH!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 1st, 2010 @ 4:59PM


That was harsh!

We let JT down in that game against Tuck.

McD
Response:

Hey, I wasn't just being a prick

BY: rgrunds
Feb 1st, 2010 @ 5:06PM


shots at the shoulder are the hardest ones. You can't get your gloves in position. Very difficult.

Remember the one Lallier let in from the blue line against the Gamblers? It was right over the shoulder.

Even from that distance,they are hard. It's an awkward move for your arms.

Plus, he has beer.
Response:

Nice game write-up, Parky!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 1st, 2010 @ 4:47PM


You said it like it was, we were uninspired and Tuck was better at everything.

I liked the "runaway elevator" and the Turner "needs glasses" jabs! HA!

McD
Response:

HA!

BY: kpark
Feb 1st, 2010 @ 6:06PM


Thanks McD! If only you get some good chuckles out of the write-ups, it's all worth the hours it takes to jot them down. I had a little help from The Govenator, I can't remember if I threw him props on that or not.

KP
Response:

GREAT write-up!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 1st, 2010 @ 4:52PM


HA HA HA! I LOVED the one about Bartline's seminar, Crazy Eyes Lyle, the sarcasm, the non-fight, and the post-game quotes. Nice job, Parky!

McD
Response:

Write Up

BY: JTStally
Feb 1st, 2010 @ 5:18PM


I agree. Well written Kelly. One technicality, the fluke goal was the second goal the blast from the circle was the third for the Brew Crew. I'll let it slide though because of the depth of the article. It's like you were on the ice for this game...
Response:

Attendance

BY: JTStally
Feb 1st, 2010 @ 5:20PM


One other technicality, I counted the attendance at 2, not 28,337. I assume you decided to round up? :)
Response:

Another good one!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 1st, 2010 @ 4:57PM


I really did laugh out loud at the Ricky "Golden Showers" nickname! Brilliant! I bet he laughed, too. If not, you're toast. Nice one limiting me to only 3 plates of wings, and for blasting the Gamblers for not going out to Bentley's after the game.

McD
Response:

Tighten That Belt Kerrigan!

BY: JTStally
Feb 1st, 2010 @ 5:33PM


Coach K, I still owe you an embarrassing dangle to even things from the Alumni Game. I suggest you tighten the belt or risk getting undressed at the blue line. Based on the questionable relationship between a few of the more boisterous players in your locker room, you probably don't want to get undressed around them.

On a different note, both teams need this game. The Whale is desperately looking to get out of the basement and the Nords haven't looked like the team that held an 8-4-1, second place record, a few weeks ago. It should be a good battle, and while the write up isn't up yet, I guarantee KPark takes his usual direction and picks his Nords by 1. Better put your money where your mouth is, buddy!
Response:

AHHHH Stally!

BY: kpark
Feb 1st, 2010 @ 10:04PM


How'd I know you would be running your mouth early in this one. Given the embarrassing string of games the Nords have put together, I picked the Whale 4-3 in a shootout.

What's the history with you and Kerrigan? Coach? Rumor has it that "Avery" is out of town. This may actually be a fun, laid back game now!!!

KP
Response:

Focus Boys!

BY: JTStally
Feb 2nd, 2010 @ 6:10PM


Sorry, I've spent much of the day coming back from Florida, so I couldn't participate in the banter. But, somewhere along the line, things got really messed up...let's bring it back to the game now boys.

Kerrigan and I go way back to sometime around mites. I was disappointed when he didn't suit up a month go. Coach K is just the nickname us jealous former Marauders have given Jamo since he's the lucky guys helping out with the old high school team.

Kelly, if it goes to a shootout, I'm expecting you to fill the vision of that Crosby visor you insist on wearing. Either crap or get off the pot (look like Crosby or stop wearing his helmet!).

Lastly in response to SK8VT, while it's the bane of my existence, when was the last time hockey made ESPN's Top 10!?
Response:

Too funny

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 2nd, 2010 @ 9:40AM


Park, I loved the "Scotty too hotty" comment, but I will have to disagree on the 3-3 shootout loss. I am predicting a Nords win to the tune of 6-2. Offense all over the gaping hole of LaLaLaLaLaLaLaLaLaLaLaLalaLalLalier......
Response:

No Liam ..

BY: Z-Skate
Feb 2nd, 2010 @ 9:51AM


I wonder what Park, Marshy & JT (aka Michael Davidson) will bitch about .. JT may play better b/c he will not be trying to take "too hotties" legs off (oops, I thought you where Liam) Oh yeah, I forgot about Jordy 0-10 on the breakaways ..
LaLaLaLalier does have some holes ..
I predict I will have about 10 shots go high and wide tonight - go figure - maybe if I use a left-handed stick, I can keep the puck down.
Response:

something....

BY: kpark
Feb 2nd, 2010 @ 10:08AM


I wish I had something to say, but my recent lackluster and pathetic play has left me a devastated shell of a hockey player. My one goal, keep my turnovers to under 10 per period.

I didn't get the "Michael Davidson" reference. JT is more like Ron Hextall. Here's a nice little video for TOP 10 GOALIES GONE WILD so that we can really gauge JTs craziness:


Response:

BY: Z-Skate
Feb 2nd, 2010 @ 11:26AM


I was thinking Hextall was alittle to cliche' .. Davidson was more of quiet "hacker" alot of JT's infractions are behind the play maybe he wants to be like Liam - interesting.
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Feb 2nd, 2010 @ 12:40PM


First things first Z-spice
1- Im going 2 for 2 on breakaways tonight (let your keep know the first ones going top shelf glove side, maybe give him a chance)
2- WHEN i get my breakaway goal, if you ask nicely after the game i just might sign the puck and give it to you as a souvenir
3- Dont think those last minute heroics are going to work tonight, they might work on the zambeauty goalie but not on JT

p.s. if you dont get a chance to catch my blistering shot u can probably catch it on espn top 10 tommorow morning...and we aint talking a kelly park wrist shot either, we all know how fast those are
Response:

Top Cheese - We shall see ..

BY: Z-Skate
Feb 2nd, 2010 @ 1:09PM


Park's shots are the only ones in the "U" I would try and block w/out pads.
Response:

not cool

BY: kpark
Feb 2nd, 2010 @ 1:16PM


Now Z, you are just trying to be hurtful. I never say anything mean about anyone in this league, and here you go, attacking me. I am a gentleman and a scholar.

Ok, I do tend to bust on Jordy because he is like Helen Keller on his breakaways, but other than that I'm a gentlemen. Oh, I did say that Z was fat and his greaseball mullet was slicking up the ice at the beginning of the season. Oh, I also said Lallier has more holes than one of McDermott's blowup dolls.

OK, you got me. I deserve everything you say. But I have recently realized that I'm not a shooter, so your insensitive jabs about my girly wristers don't hurt. I'm actually not much of a passer or skater, but what I do have is a HUGE FUCKING MOUTH! And I'm gonna trash talk you all night long Z.

KP
Response:

why .. Park .. why ..

BY: Z-Skate
Feb 2nd, 2010 @ 1:48PM


You gotta go knocking the man-boobs .. I thought you were check them out in the shower during pre-season !!?? I have been growing them for a long time and they all mine .. no ideas.
Response:

Oh, I also said Lallier has more holes than one of McDermott's blowup dolls.

BY: Z-Skate
Feb 2nd, 2010 @ 1:50PM


Thgat's alot of holes ..
Response:

LOTS of holes

BY: kpark
Feb 2nd, 2010 @ 1:52PM


And he has holes in weird places, like on the bottom of the feet & the back of the head. Not that I've seen them....I mean, not that I would know, these are all rumors about McDermott's Blowup dolls.
Response:

Dolls?

BY: hkydoc
Feb 2nd, 2010 @ 2:46PM


Hey, cut that out! They are blow up FARM ANIMALS! You guys are hurting my feelings... :(

McD
Response:

sheep are nice

BY: rgrunds
Feb 2nd, 2010 @ 4:40PM


here Flossie....that's a good girl...
Response:

Lackluster would be nice Park ..

BY: Z-Skate
Feb 2nd, 2010 @ 11:44AM


maybe you could put the word out and strive for consistency and have all the Nords' show a lackluster performance tonight ..
Response:

BORING!

BY: kpark
Feb 2nd, 2010 @ 1:17PM


The Gamblers & Brewers are boring. No pre-game banter. You all take yourselves too seriously. BOOOOOOORING!
Response:

Gamblers ..

BY: Z-Skate
Feb 2nd, 2010 @ 2:29PM


Are out back of Woodstock Arena doing Plyos ..
Response:

BOOOORING

BY: kpark
Feb 2nd, 2010 @ 1:18PM


The Tuckies & Dead River Rats are boring. No pre-game banter. You all take yourselves too seriously. BOOOOOOORING!
Response:

Brewers ..

BY: Z-Skate
Feb 2nd, 2010 @ 2:31PM


Are trying to get CJ to calm down and Garren is trying to figure out how not to get 10 PIM's tonight ..
Response:

WTF?

BY: hkydoc
Feb 2nd, 2010 @ 2:48PM


C'mon, Guys! I anyone paying attention out there? You're about as exciting as the Gamblers post-game at Bentleys... (cricket sounds).

McD
Response:

BOOO!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 2nd, 2010 @ 3:46PM


Show your spirit and get on here for some pre-game trash talk and some post-game beers! (this means YOU, Gamblers!)

McD
Response:

Sid's a Bitch

BY: JTStally
Feb 2nd, 2010 @ 10:43PM


Where was Cindy, er, I mean Kelly after the game? I expected him stop by and share some consolatory blue cheese with a side of wings with his McDefensive-Partner.

Personally, I would have liked the opportunity to compliment him on that sweet penalty he took late in the game. In case he didn't notice, we scored the game winner while he was sitting in the box...very un-Crosby like. :)
Response:

Long Trail

BY: JTStally
Feb 2nd, 2010 @ 10:49PM


Also, just for the record, I'd like it to be noted that after running my mouth last week about Magic Hat's superiority to Long Trail before the game against Brewers, I literally tasted my words by showing at Bentley's postgame and ordering a Long Trail. I didn't enjoy it; it tasted like defeat.
Response:

settle down Stally!

BY: kpark
Feb 2nd, 2010 @ 10:50PM


Hey Jon, you seem to know alot about the game tonight. Did someone call you to fill you in.....oh wait....were you playing? I thought I saw some Trojan colors out there doing absolutely nothing of use. Maybe that was you!

I went home to sulk in my own pity. Not about the penalty, which I will take any time a guy has a breakaway, but about how that guy got behind McDefensive-Partner and myself. My head is also still ringing from that fatso Zanleoni running me over in front of my own net.

Great game though. Whale Tale played a good one, and yes, they did score the game winner with me in the box and a minute to play. I went to the box and felt shame.

KP
Response:

The Gamble ..

BY: Z-Skate
Feb 3rd, 2010 @ 6:58AM


McD get off the Gambler\'s nuts .. If they don\'t want to have post-game beers & wings - No big deal. It means more wings for you.

Speaking of post-game beers - Where was Mrs. Park and her \"partner\" Madame (sp) Marshy? No, JT either? Fair-weather drinkers are you?
Response:

Z

BY: kpark
Feb 3rd, 2010 @ 10:27AM


Zamboni, settle down. I had to go home and change my tampon and cry myself to sleep. Not sure where everyone else was.

In all reality, all I wanted to do was sleep for 20 straight hours after reffing the first game and playing in the last 2. It sucks being fat & out of shape.

Great game last night.
Response:

It sucks being fat & out of shape.

BY: Z-Skate
Feb 3rd, 2010 @ 11:27AM


You have great "whole donut shape" .. McD was relishing in it last night w/ his blue cheese and a side of wings.
Response:

I'm really encouraged

BY: rgrunds
Feb 3rd, 2010 @ 9:38AM


um, McD, Do you want to exchange photos of farm animals?
Response:

No press

BY: stevekenning
Feb 3rd, 2010 @ 5:32PM


McGovern issued a Canucks style team-wide gag order following some heinous reffing in our last two games. No UVHL press access, and especially no comments on UVHL.com.

It looks like we've got the league's attention.
Response:

interesting

BY: rgrunds
Feb 5th, 2010 @ 2:22PM


nice write up.
Response:

these are good

BY: rgrunds
Feb 5th, 2010 @ 7:04PM


did kelly write them?
Response:

Matty Jr.

BY: Garrentee
Feb 8th, 2010 @ 9:32AM


I hate to say it but we are gonna light up backup goalie Matty Albertazzi in this game!!
Response:

Tazzy?

BY: kpark
Feb 8th, 2010 @ 4:13PM


Is Tazzy in net for this one? Where is that sieve Hadley?
Response:

3 goal spread?

BY: JTStally
Feb 8th, 2010 @ 6:38PM


I'm excited for this one. The Whale has been playing much better lately and has finally started to close out games. This is a big chance to prove ourselves against one of the league's top teams. The last matchup between the two teams came down to a shootout and forgive me for being mildly offended that the spread is 3 goals, but I'm anticipating a game that comes down to the last few minutes, like most of the recent Whalers' games.

It might count against us though that Park-ed In The Penalty Box if reffing, as I'm sure he'll be looking for a make-up whistle for his late trip to the sin bin last week that resulted in a W for the W.
Response:

stally!

BY: kpark
Feb 8th, 2010 @ 7:10PM


HOW DARE YOU ACCUSE ME of taking last week out on you guys. But thanks for reminding me, I actually went to my shrink on Wednesday and had him hypnotize me and completely wipe my memory of last Tuesday. That was the only way to get me off of suicide watch....but now I have this box cutter in my hand......and I'm really sad thinking about last weeks game.....asshole!

KP
Response:

BLEEEEEERS

BY: kpark
Feb 8th, 2010 @ 7:13PM


I think it is time that someone knocked the BLERS off of their pedestal. Unfortunately I don't think it will be the lowly Nordiques, so I may or may not have planted an explosive device in 4 or more of the BLERS cars.....if you want to risk coming to the game, it's your CALL!!!

KABLOOEY!!!!!
Response:

Algorithm says...

BY: McG
Feb 9th, 2010 @ 1:50PM


Steve "They Killed" Kenning in net tonight. Spread moves to 4 now, sorry Stally.
Response:

Tazzy

BY: Garrentee
Feb 9th, 2010 @ 2:25PM


Yes he is...or so he says!!
Response:

Touche Govenator

BY: JTStally
Feb 9th, 2010 @ 2:41PM


I did promise 5 goals the next time we faced Yacey, but I guess we won't get the chance tonight. Good to see that even his own teammates question how far over the hill he is, though. Remember when Yacey used to be good!? Or, maybe, the bigger question is remember when Dartmouth used to be good?...Back when it had Yacey!
Response:

Where's McDefense?

BY: JTStally
Feb 9th, 2010 @ 2:44PM


No comment yet from McD! I thought the discussion board was the highlight of his week (aside from the postgame showers, of course).
Response:

5 Olde .. after games at Campion

BY: Z-Skate
Feb 10th, 2010 @ 12:03PM


From JT - I talked to our owner, Dan, yesterday, about the possibility of offering a similar deal on food/beer that we currently get at Bentley\'s.
Dan would be willing to offer the UVHL a promotion if it was worth his while in business, but we (as a league) would need to guarantee him some kind of commitment so that he knew it would be worth keeping the kitchen open an hour later than usual.
-Stally
Response:

I'm down...

BY: kpark
Feb 10th, 2010 @ 1:18PM


I have no problem switching venues. But I want an example of the promotion that they would run. Plus they need to have more than a couple of dozen wings, just in case McDiscipline shows up.
Response:

Screw 5-Olde

BY: pb
Feb 10th, 2010 @ 3:02PM


Yep, I said it.

The place sucks, AND they refused my Alaskan ID one night like I was a silly Canadian.

My vote is for Murphys, and that is all that really matters.
Response:

Who was the bartender?

BY: JTStally
Feb 10th, 2010 @ 11:36PM


Obviously, it wasn't me, PB, I don't usually turn down a lot of IDs so long as they are over 21 and aren't expired and look legitimate. Also, not sure when you last went in there, but the new owner has really done a good job with the place (not to write off the fact that it's still stuck in the basement).

Yes, Kelly, 5 Olde is renowned for its wings, we have orders of 10 and 24, five different flavors, and plenty of blue cheese, but obviously, McDeep-dip could get an order of 48 or 72 or whatever multiple of 24 (or 10) he so chooses. I'll make sure it's a good deal, but again, as I said in my email to the Team Managers, I need to make sure it's worth keeping the kitchen open after 10. If people go to Murphy's, it circumvents the promotion.

Although I question judgment if you go to Murphy's. Seriously, I live in Hanover and go out there all the time, and you know how often I go to Murphy's!? Never! Not even the people that work at Murphy's go to Murphy's! Not to mention, the beers there are the most expensive in town (and, yes, that includes comparison to the Canoe Club). And, obviously, unless someone has been negotiating with them, there won't be a deal on anything, and the kitchen will still close at 10.
Response:

Rib Night

BY: JTStally
Feb 10th, 2010 @ 11:50PM


One other thing worth noting that Tuesday is rib night at 5 Olde, which means that ribs are just 75 cents each. This would only be applicable for the teams that arrived at the bar while the FULL kitchen was still open (before 10), but it's another perk.

I would expect that if the kitchen stayed open for us after 10, it would be on a limited menu, such as wings and other bar type food, so that the chef could close down some of the kitchen while he waited for the last game to finish.
Response:

Hmmm...

BY: hkydoc
Feb 11th, 2010 @ 11:57AM


Sounds like this has potential, but did you know that the games are 40 minutes later at Campion vs. Woodstock? The early game starts at 7:10, and then you add 1h15 min plus 10 min scrape for each consecutive game making us finish around 11:25 (IF we are on time) plus shower and then to 5 Olde just before midnight after the last game. Let us know if this works, otherwise I know EBA's is open for food afterwards...

McBuffaloWings
Response:

I'm in for whatever place takes care of us the best

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 12th, 2010 @ 1:59PM


Cheapest beer would be a good draw, but the WINGS and Bleu have got to be QUALITY...I'm not talkin no "Chernobyl Farms" wings that look like something out of Pet Cemetary, and grow back as you eat them...although that would make McD absolutely nuts! Imagine only having to eat one wing, that constantly grew back, only having to continuously roll it in gob after gob of Bleu cheese??? Burrppp...I think I threw up a bit in my mouth.
On a serious note, I'm in for whatever place will have the best turnout. As long as I don't have to sit and listen to Jay-Z whine about protecting his snot-nosed little brother Liam...JK Z...see you fags on Tues.
Response:

u must be mistaken ..

BY: Z-Skate
Feb 12th, 2010 @ 3:03PM


I am not whining .. I am pushing buttons and Park just went to Wal-Greens to get some blood pressure pills.
Response:

Follow Up

BY: JTStally
Feb 14th, 2010 @ 12:08AM


So, I checked back in at 5 Olde and it looks like the deal that we have would be late night wings. Wings would be priced like they are during wing night (50 cents/wing) and would be available in either orders of 10 or 24. These wings are pretty big wings, unlike Bentley's, so 10 should be a good individual order, 24 if you're splitting with 2/3. Pints of beer would be $3. Again, this isn't official, but I figured I'd start throwing out numbers.

McD, thanks for the heads up on the later scheduling. That makes it all the more important to either give a "yes" or "no" vote on this. In talking to the chef, he said that, ultimately, the easiest thing to do for the late crowd would be to just leave the fryer on and have the bartender drop the wings when the orders came in.
Response:

SHOOTOUTS! Stats!

BY: kpark
Feb 11th, 2010 @ 12:29PM


Hey guys, I was doing a little research on the Nordiques Shootout history, since we got blanked in all 4 shootout attempts this week against the gamblers. I found some interesting tidbits.

MOST CAREER SHOOTOUTS: Matty Marrazzo (GMB) 1 for 11
MOST CAREER GOALS: Nick Bayley (BRE) 5 for 8
WORST PERCENTAGE: Ian Coates (NDQ) 0 for 7

PERFECTION (MIN. 2 ATTEMPTS) ROB BARKER (STK) & Brian Flemming (TCK) both 2 for 2

BY TEAM:

Gamblers (18%) 13 for 72
Nordiques (24%) 14 for 59
Brewers (39%) 22 for 57
Tuck (37%) 14 for 38
Whalers (17%) 4 for 24
Storm Kings (28%) 5 for 18
Dead River (33%) 1 for 3

OTHER NOTABLES:
Willy Meyer 1/8
Mike O\'Neil 3/9
Roger Phillips 2/5
Scotty Shaw 1/2
Jim LeCLair 1/2
Alex Brands 1/2
Rob Pattison 1/2
Drew Crapser 1/2
Ryan McGovern 1/2

I\'m very surprised by the Gambler\'s percentage.

KP

Response:

shootout percentages v slot opportunities

BY: rgrunds
Feb 11th, 2010 @ 1:01PM


NHL statistics show a greater probability of goal scoring when the offense creates a shot opportunity from the slot, than on a penalty shot/breakaway.

breakaways/penalty shots run around 33% while shots from the slot after movement are 50% and higher.

defense.
Response:

Where are YOUR stats, Park?

BY: hkydoc
Feb 11th, 2010 @ 2:40PM


Did you forget your stellar 2 for 15 shootout mark, and 13 for 15 miss the net stumbling over yourself streak?

I, on the other hand, am a perfect 0 for 0 because we've never had a Nords shootout that got to the last guy picked yet.

With respect to the Gamblers, their goalies have saved the majority of shootout attempts, so their low percentage of scoring still got them several wins (3 this season alone, I think) in OT.

Interesting stats! Thanks, eh!

McD
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Feb 11th, 2010 @ 6:46PM


McDiesel i believe u were in a shootout at the end of last year against tuck at campion when our whole friggen team shot before O'neil put one in right? n where is mine... i must be atleast 2 for 20 career...0 for 18 this year
Response:

HA

BY: kpark
Feb 11th, 2010 @ 7:07PM


Don't worry about it McD.....I'm bringing a printout to every game from now on. I'm 2-8 lifetime.....with 6 slight misses with a stumble head first crash into the end boards.

Jordy, you are 2-6 lifetime!

KP
Response:

description of Oliver falls on deaf ears over at Whaler\'s camp

BY: Z-Skate
Feb 12th, 2010 @ 11:35AM


Not on deaf ears but it\'s the liberties that are also taken w/ him that have me up in arms. If he does something and the ref doesn\'t call it who\'s to blame .. I am not blaming the refs and we all know Laim plays on \"an edge of sorts\" but is there a problem w/ hovering around the goalie for a few seconds.
Maybe that\'s why JT tried to take Shaw\'s legs off b/c he \"hovered\" to long not b/c he thought it was Liam?
Guys, I just think Liam is an easy target from years past .. Oh yeah, I also enjoy trying to defend him and watching Park\'s blood pressure and facial tint rise to unhealthy levels. It\'s the same satisfaction McD gets from a bowl full of wings.
Response:

Conspiracy

BY: kpark
Feb 12th, 2010 @ 11:43AM


Ok, Whalers, you have figured it out. The entire league got together last year when Oliver joined and said...."let's pick one poor sap to pick on." So every guy that every went near him has to cheap shot him for the hell of it.

It's true, collectively we picked a random target, it's not a coincidence that everyone "acts" like they hate him. He's 100% innocent and has not infuriated the 40 guys that have taken illegitimate cheap shots on him.

KP
Response:

ah .. Park ..

BY: Z-Skate
Feb 12th, 2010 @ 2:55PM


This is what I mean .. I truly felt your blood pressure go up 20 points and I am late reading this - haha
Response:

You Said It Parky

BY: JTStally
Feb 14th, 2010 @ 12:24AM


I'm glad you admit that the entire league takes cheap shots at him, and I question why, as a referee, you feel it's ok to discriminate your calls based on who is getting cheap shotted. Correct me if I'm off base, but refs are supposed to conduct themselves in an impartial manner. A penalty's a penalty no matter who takes it or who gets taken out, that's Jay's point.

And, while I might be new in this league, I've played every team and there's at least a douche bag or two on every single one of them (take that kid on the Brewers that challenged Jay to a fight, or that joker on Tuck that got mad that Scotty Shaw snowed his goalie moments after he snowed Kenny, or JT justifying his two-hander on Shaw with the fact that he thought it was someone else)...there's guys all around this league that demonstrate far less sportsmanship than makes sense for a once-a-week men's league.

I also get a kick out of how everyone in this (relatively) 30-some-odd-year-old league has their panties up in a bunch about some 19 year-old kid that measures 5-8 and weighs in at 145. Forgive me, but I find a certain irony in the smallest and youngest kid in the league being the one that gets the most attention when it comes to his physical play.
Response:

stally

BY: kpark
Feb 14th, 2010 @ 8:34AM


First off, that was called sarcasm, it's a tool that is frequently used with the intention " to make its victim the butt of contempt or ridicule." In this case, the Whaler's bitching and whining about the "cheap" shots that Oliver gets behind the plays. In a 2 ref system, most action behind the play, which in Men's league shouldn't be happening, doesn't get caught. If Avery has an issue with the "actions behind the play", maybe he should stop initiating contact and getting under people's skin. Having been the recipient of some of Avery's antics, I can say that he has perfected the art of avoiding the referee's eyeline when he takes his liberties.

It is funny how the only people willing to stick up for that little deuschbag are the people that don't have to play against him. And to call into question the referees intentions is a quick way to get your ass mandated to ref hockey games in the UVHL next year in order to play. That way some of you assholes can finally understand that there are 12 players spread across the ice and you can't fucking keep your eyes on all of them at all times.

My blood pressure is boiling and I'm about to hunt down Zanleoni and two hand him across the throat for starting this forum thread.

bottom line: keep your obnoxious little dog in check and we won't have any issues, otherwise, shut your fucking mouths, because you don't have the right to complain.
Response:

Whalers Complaint

BY: JTStally
Feb 14th, 2010 @ 12:49PM


Park, as a whole, there isn't a lot of complaining about the refs. I think that the reffing is very suitable for the format of the league and that everyone has been doing a good job (that includes McWhistle, even if the league poll might have joked otherwise).

The issue that Jay is bringing up, and that I am echoing, is that many times the calls are different in regards to Oliver compared to the rest of the league. I'm not gonna stand up for all his actions, but it's a pain to the team when a player on our team (Oliver) takes a dirty hit but we don't get the benefit of a powerplay, even though if it happened to anyone else, it'd be a penalty. That's the complaint, it's not a knock on the reffing as a whole.
Response:

Happy Valentine's Day ..

BY: Z-Skate
Feb 14th, 2010 @ 2:10PM


Mr. Park - you have my address big boy - if you want to hunt me down .. haha
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Feb 14th, 2010 @ 12:13PM


and i believe that is exactly why a 30 year old hasnt been the shit out of a 19 year old 145 pound boy yet...how good is that going to look
Response:

Sarcasm

BY: JTStally
Feb 14th, 2010 @ 12:53PM


Also, I got the sarcasm here, I simply chose to ignore most of the post and focus on the part that admits "40 guys have taken cheap shots on him" for the sake of advancing my argument. You notice I also dismiss the sarcastic term "illegitimate" as I understand why Oliver has infuriated many people. But again, the point being that just because Oliver is an instigator, doesn't make it right to allow cheap shots to happen.
Response:

WAHHHHHH

BY: kpark
Feb 14th, 2010 @ 2:48PM


All I'm hearing here is "WAH WAH WAH....BOO FUCKING HOO". If Oliver is complaining about the retaliation, he probably shouldn't be instigating the issues in the first place. Don't Dish it if you can't take it. Secondly, if it isn't Oliver bitching about it, then you guys have no right to complain because he knows that he is getting back what he has instigated, and that is the risk of playing like Avery. Either way, you don't have a foot to stand on.

Additionally, I haven't not made a call, just because it was on Oliver. Most shit happens behind the play, because that is where that little shit operates. Sometimes I'll see the aftermath, but you can't make a call just because you see something that may or may not have happened. Stally, you are quickly working yourself into a mandatory reffing gig for next season, especially since you seem to think it is such an easy position, and that every call is obviously black and white.


Response:

Where's the love?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 14th, 2010 @ 5:41PM


I for one am turning over a new leaf, and re-instating my old pre-game ritual. Therefore, I will love and respect each and every player, and ref in the "U". Please excuse any former threats or physical contact I have administered to any of you. From now on, I will be weaving and deking my way through the ice with a huge smile on my face.
I love you Mary Jane...you had me at hello
Response:

Oh! The Irony!

BY: JTStally
Feb 14th, 2010 @ 10:28PM


You're complaining about our team complaining about your complaining about our teammate.

Listen to us, we sound like a group of seventh grade girls that got sent to the guidance counselor because we can't get along. Haha!

Kelly, if you pull my ponytail again, I'm gonna tell the teacher on you!

...Wow, that metaphor fits even better than expected with your first name, Parky :)
Response:

HAAAAADLEYYYYYYYYYYY

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 12th, 2010 @ 2:03PM


Can't wait to smoke one by you Hads...just to let you have it!!!
Bring a silver sharpie, I'll sign it for ya!
Response:

Please Pass the Pepper

BY: Nords Fan
Feb 14th, 2010 @ 8:09AM


On the heels of their best game all season, the Nords will certainly light up Hadley all night. Let the peppering begin.
Response:

Upper Valley Gamblers

BY: JTStally
Feb 15th, 2010 @ 11:05AM


"No smiling, poker faces only!"
Response:

Lights out

BY: stevekenning
Feb 15th, 2010 @ 9:33PM


PJs and warm milk at 9 sharp in the Kenning household. I'm out, Yacey's in.

Brew: Sorry to be the bearer of bad news. Put in a good effort.
Response:

HA!

BY: kpark
Feb 16th, 2010 @ 7:32AM


Damn Steve, I'm jealous. I never get warm milk at home.
Response:

Pad your stats night

BY: hkydoc
Feb 16th, 2010 @ 3:10PM


Its official!

McD
Response:

The Real Reason

BY: JTStally
Feb 16th, 2010 @ 3:54PM


Are you sure that's it Steve? Are you sure it's not because you're still snowbound from the blizzard that Scotty brought down on you last week? :)
Response:

Avery Alive And Well

BY: JTStally
Feb 17th, 2010 @ 12:23AM


Oliver wasn't able to make it to the game, but, luckily for us, Robert "Slu-t Foot" Ammel filled in the job of getting dirty behind the play, so this game didn't miss Oliver's presence TOO much.

Also, of note, I was the only one to correctly pick the winner of this game...exciting game for both teams (unless you pride yourself in your defense!)
Response:

Good Game last night!

BY: PaleWhale
Feb 17th, 2010 @ 8:19AM




The bigger question .... IS THE WHALE FOR REAL?
Response:

Steven Seagal Wednesday!

BY: McG
Feb 17th, 2010 @ 9:43AM


\"\"


Response:

Really?

BY: kpark
Feb 17th, 2010 @ 9:46AM


Really McG!?!?!? WTF!!! You are very disturbed.
Response:

BY: McG
Feb 17th, 2010 @ 10:24AM


Steven Seagal asks questions later.
Response:

Agreed!

BY: kpark
Feb 17th, 2010 @ 10:31AM


McGimpy, I guess you are right. Those kids did look pretty shady. The kid with the lollipop definitely stole it, and the others were all carrying weapons.

KP
Response:

For Real?...Next Week

BY: JTStally
Feb 17th, 2010 @ 9:52AM


I know us Whalers say this every week, but next week will be a big game. Perhaps it's cause we started in such a hole, but each week is very important. We just beat the top team, and we can't afford to lose to a solid last place team, especially considering DR is close behind.

The key for them (DR) will be getting a solid turnout. If DR can put out at least two good lines, it'll be a good game, but if it only has a couple subs, it'll have trouble playing three full periods (just like this week's game against the Nords).
Response:

Wished I coulda been there

BY: kirt
Feb 17th, 2010 @ 10:03AM


Due to circumstances beyond my control I missed what looks like a good one. Although, had I been there it might have turned out differently. It sounds like our blue line did fine without me.

Who showed, who scored, how did it go down? *nudge nudge*
Response:

Helluva Good one

BY: kpark
Feb 17th, 2010 @ 1:33PM


Yeah Kirt, you missed a solid game. The Gamblers came out flat and the Whale came out flying, jumping out to a 5-1 lead early in the 2nd period.

Then the Gambler's started clicking, and chipping away. I've gotta give it to the Whale though, you guys didn't just sit back and prey on stopping them, the Whale added a couple goals late in the game, but the killer was the Clausen 180 foot empty netter from his own goal line to make it 8-6.

KP
Response:

Parky\'s Beer Fund

BY: JTStally
Feb 18th, 2010 @ 10:37PM


I noticed that Parky nominated himself for the Player of the Week poll. This must be his way of telling us that he doesn\'t have enough money for beer. I\'m hoping to try to set up a fund to help raise money for him. I\'m requesting that each player chip in somewhere between a dime and a quarter, this should be enough to cover a case if we get enough people to donate. It also might be a nice gesture if someone offered to buy him a postgame beer at Bentley\'s at some point. Obviously, this would be a charitable organization, so all donations would be tax deductible.

Here\'s where I need the league\'s help though: I need a good name for this charity, so, for that, I leave the floor open to, what I expect to be, an interesting discussion.
Response:

AHHH Thanks Stally!

BY: kpark
Feb 19th, 2010 @ 5:51AM


I also need some groceries too, so if everyone could chip in an extra nickel, I can get those ice cream bars that I REALLY love! They go great with beer.

I'm also printing up some "VOTE FOR KELLY!" T-Shirts that I'll be selling or $100 apiece in a booth outside of Union Arena. They are pretty sweet, and say on the back "Kelly is a boys name, motherfucker!!!" They come in your standard Nordique Puke Green & a nice pink for the ladies....and you Stally!

KP
Response:

T-Shirts!? Heck No!

BY: JTStally
Feb 19th, 2010 @ 9:08AM


You know you're getting older when you still think a T-shirt fundraiser would be effective. The trendy thing these days are those goofy little wristbands that Lance Armstrong made popular. Lance's "Live Strong" campaign was designed to increase awareness about testicular cancer, so this would be a perfect fundraiser for this campaign: Armstrong's message was that even if you only have one nut, you can still be a man; your message is that even if your name sounds like the bronze medalist in the women's halfpipe (Kelly Clark), you can still be a man.

As far as what to write on the wristbands, this is your chance to leverage your likeness to Sidney Crosby, not only in your on-ice prowess and appearance, but also in that his name, coincidentally, could go either way: "Sidney and Kelly: Dudes Dominating Dudes."
Response:

ha

BY: kpark
Feb 19th, 2010 @ 9:13AM


STALLY, that was fucking priceless......."DUDES DOMINATING DUDES" I just pissed myself at my desk. It sounds kind of gay, but I LOVE IT!!!!! oh, wait, was that supposed to sound gay? crap.
Response:

Interpretation

BY: JTStally
Feb 19th, 2010 @ 9:19AM


It's intended to mean two guys with girl's names (Sidney and Kelly) are actually dudes that dominate their respective dude's ice hockey leagues. You need to realize that these wristbands are small and there's not enough space to say all that, so I had to cut it down to "Dudes Dominating Dudes." ...Not sure, where you got the whole gay thing from, is there something you wanted to share with us? Haha.
Response:

Post 500

BY: JTStally
Feb 19th, 2010 @ 9:20AM


Also, congrats, your last post is your 500th in the league...a true milestone and...accomplishment (?)
Response:

Charity name

BY: rgrunds
Feb 19th, 2010 @ 1:15PM


Kelly Park Clitoral Reconstruction Fund

"Build a Button for Park"
Response:

Wow!

BY: JTStally
Feb 19th, 2010 @ 4:03PM


That...that's just wrong...(but, also the main reason I opened it up to discussion, so I guess I got what I asked for.)
Response:

heh-heh-heh

BY: rgrunds
Feb 19th, 2010 @ 5:40PM


..haben zie kein angst, kind....


Response:

How about...

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 19th, 2010 @ 2:18PM


giving a family a chance guys. Every weekend Kelly and his family set up a game of 3-Card Monte in the Subway in Boston. His kids are taught to distract the "customers" with moans of hunger, and rubbing their empty bellies, while Alana, dressed in a full rubber catsuit does her best to rub up against unsuspecting folks, only to snatch a wallet or pocketbook without them any the wiser. This is a truly sad story of an American Dream gone terribly wrong. Won't you help a struggling family get back the self-respect they have obviously been robbed of? Speaking of being robbed, pick the middle card, we all know it's the wrong one, but play along. It'll go a long way to making at least one child's life better. Thank you, SUCKAAAAAAAA
Response:

Ya know, Marshy....

BY: rgrunds
Feb 20th, 2010 @ 7:00AM


I have small children and I'd be really upset and potentially violent if I knew that other guys were thinking about my little girl offering herself to the public in an erotic cat-suit. I mean, how would you feel if you knew there were people on the ice just trembling at the though of a nubile, sexually precocious, pre-teen? How would you manage the uncertainty of knowing that the guy skating next to you is imagining the delicious possibilities of...a cat suit? Hmmm?
Response:

Again Grundy

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 20th, 2010 @ 2:11PM


I'm gonna tell you this, one more time. If you don't know what you're talking about, don't comment on it. Alana, is Kelly's WIFE! I would never in a million years even THINK about anything remotely sexual about a child, let alone put that on a public forum. I guess I should have been more clear. I have two little girls, and the thought of that disgusts me. Another thing, YOU are the one that suggested that a "delicious possibility of a pre-teen in a catsuit" would cross my mind in a game. My mind is almost always on the GAME! You are a sick man Grundy, and you definitely should re-think your line of thinking, and NEVER bring that sort of shit up on here again.
Response:

Oh My....

BY: rgrunds
Feb 20th, 2010 @ 2:44PM


just kidding Marshy.....

just kidding.

my my...temper temper.
Response:

Marshy, You're O.K.

BY: rgrunds
Feb 23rd, 2010 @ 7:35AM


I checked around. No one thinks you have un-natural inclinations...anymore.

Personally, I have always thought you were a credit to the species of Over-sized White People.

Hang in there.
Response:

Thanks Bob

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 23rd, 2010 @ 7:53AM


I needed that boost of self-esteem
Response:

Check Back at Circle-K

BY: JTStally
Feb 19th, 2010 @ 4:18PM


While CWS (code name: ChiSox) is currently available at Walmart and Mobil, I'm currently in negotiations with Circle-K to sell the product as well. The only factual deficiency is that I NEVER took chemistry at USC, but fear not, there are no KNOWN side effects...yet (although it IS known that there ARE side effects).
Response:

HA!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 21st, 2010 @ 10:45AM


"Broken Clocks" Turner...couldn't time it right just like in his personal life... HA! Funny, funny shit, Park! If JT had implanted solar powered clocks in both of his wrists he'd still be 10 minutes late!

Great write-up!

McD
Response:

Awesome game recap

BY: hkydoc
Feb 21st, 2010 @ 11:00AM


Parky, this one is one of your finest works of literature! Great humor, detail, and analysis!

McD
Response:

nice....

BY: kpark
Feb 22nd, 2010 @ 6:19AM


Thanks McDiesel!
Response:

Canadians oot

BY: stevekenning
Feb 22nd, 2010 @ 7:57AM


Expect most Canadians to be sidelined for this one, since our national hockey team has chosen to get as much ice time as possible in these 2010 Olympics. Canada v. Germany starting at 730. Tough scheduling conflict totally unanticipated by the UVHL.

I honestly don't know where our money goes.

Response:

Canada Sucks

BY: JTStally
Feb 22nd, 2010 @ 11:19PM


Yeah, I said it. All due respect to our "Impossible Dream" team here in the US, but they tied the Swiss and lost to an unseasoned group of American kids. I agree with the Pre-Game Report, this game should be DVR'd. If Canada loses, you'll regret having watched it; but considering it's Germany, the Maple Leafs should win easily.

I want to see what the Gamblers have in store after the loss. Everyone falls off the horse, but it's those that dust themselves off and get right back up that win championships. In high school, we had a team goal: never lose consecutive games (and we never did). This should be a good test for the Poker Faced considering how well Tuck has played. If the Gamblers can pull this out, the rest of us best take cover; if they don't, it's open season and everyone is gonna want a rifle.
Response:

I don't know where to begin

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 23rd, 2010 @ 8:47PM


First things first, USA beat us hands down. Convincingly? I think not. The score may have been 5-3, but honestly, 3 of the 5 were deflected, and 1 was an empty-net goal. I will say that the US team looked really good. They were fast, physical and were the hungrier team. As a Canadian, I hope we can get by Russia, but I know this will be a tough task. Russia has the most potent offense. I wouldn't want to be the next country that faces Canada if we happen to beat the Russians. Sweden will also be a tough win, and they have many offensive talents. Not taking anything away from USA, because they earned the big upset, and I know I felt, as many other Canadians felt like they were punched in the gut after that one. In closing, I know that Ryan Miller has got to be the difference. If he has even an average game, they likely won't make the medals. As a hockey fan though, this Gold medal is almost impossible to predict, but with Russia as the favorite in my opinion, any team that knocks them off, goes right to the top.
Response:

What to wear for my big debut

BY: Ozzy
Feb 23rd, 2010 @ 7:11AM


Do I wear my Red, white and blue (bleu, blanc et rouge for the Frenchies) pad set tonight since there won't be any Canadians on the ice or do I go with my wet set, decisions, decisions.
Response:

DR, Bring Your Team!

BY: JTStally
Feb 22nd, 2010 @ 4:56PM


Jay has put in some minutes for Dead River this year, but he plays for us, so he can't help them this game. I was talking to Marty at the bar the other day, and told him that when they have a full team they are probably one of the more intimidating teams in the league, but nobody's intimidated by an empty bench, not in the quick A-league.

If DR can at least sport two full lines, this game should be a good battle. If not, then the Whalers (barring last Tuesday's snowstorm) have been turning out strong numbers and have been playing well as a unit, so this one could get lopsided by the end (like last week's Nords-DR game).
Response:

100% pick the whale?

BY: PaleWhale
Feb 23rd, 2010 @ 11:26AM



The apocalypse is upon us!
Response:

No Jordy, No Joking

BY: JTStally
Feb 22nd, 2010 @ 11:11PM


Sure, he might miss 8-10 breakaways a game, but the 2 that he finishes could be the difference between winning and losing. He's also contributed to exactly half the team's goals, which means that if the Nords want to win this week, Big Sid needs to fill some big shoes and put up another week worthy of a POW Nomination.
Response:

POW Voting

BY: JTStally
Feb 22nd, 2010 @ 11:27PM


Parky, most websites only let you vote from the same IP address once. There has to be a way to program that for POW!

This week\'s 103 votes isn\'t that absurd, but three weeks ago there were 519 votes, two weeks ago it was 315, last week it was down to a \"manageable\" 185 votes...when you think about it, there\'s less than 100 players in the league...
Response:

I hear ya

BY: kpark
Feb 23rd, 2010 @ 6:23AM


Stally, we figured it was better to allow people to vote every hour if they wanted. It's really more for fun & interaction than a SERIOUS vote. It is meant to engage our users & bring them back to the site.

We could definitely tighten up the voting if that's what everyone wants.

KP
Response:

"Marketing and Promotion"

BY: JTStally
Feb 23rd, 2010 @ 9:28AM


I like that line of thought, although perhaps once a day would make a little more sense. I think the only people that check the website every hour are you, me, and McD (and the guy trying to win the POW award), but that's really just cause we have nothing better to do and I don't think WE (the three of us) need a poll to keep checking back.
Response:

St. Patty\'s Cup!

BY: kpark
Feb 23rd, 2010 @ 6:27AM


Gentlemen & Ladies,
The 3rd annual St. Patty\'s Shootout is March 12th, 13th, and 14th at Spartan Arena in Rutland. I have attached the registration form and some more info about it. The past couple years they have hosted this tournament it has been a great event with good competitive hockey. With most of you living in the general area, I would like to invite you and your teams to this years tournament. I think they were hoping to see a UVHL team join, or even a UVHL \"allstar\" team if anyone wants to do some recruiting. The word doc is below:

Details & Registration Form

Kelly
Response:

Hmmm.

BY: Oliver
Feb 23rd, 2010 @ 7:09AM


I'm down for a roster slot if someone is interested in organizing it.
Response:

tournament

BY: rgrunds
Mar 1st, 2010 @ 11:21AM


Liam,

I want to do this. I spoke with the organizer. It should be a very nice skate. Very similar to UVHL quality.

Can you get some skaters? I'm available.

BG
802-851-1120
Response:

UVHL Hits the Road

BY: JTStally
Mar 3rd, 2010 @ 2:40PM


I'll be in Montreal for the B's-Habs game the weekend of this tournament, but I'm definitely interested in future possibilities like this during the spring. It'd certainly be fun to see what kind of an "All Star" team we could put on the ice. Although it'd be an interesting controversy for the last defenseman's spot between me and Parky. Clearly, I'd be deserving with my advantage in skills, skating, and smarts, but since Parky holds the power, he'd probably end up getting it.
Response:

Big Game tonight

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 23rd, 2010 @ 7:51AM


Boys, huge game tonight, with playoff implications. The Brewers are officially our daddy. We need to man up, get that shovel out of the shed, and plant one RIGHT in the middle of their forehead. Nords win tonight...5-4 in a close one
Response:

Directly in my belly!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 23rd, 2010 @ 7:57AM


Wings and Bleu Cheese is where your money goes, eh! Why? Did you think it went for something that actually made a difference in people's lives?

Okay, okay...now to Stally. "Unseasoned group of American kids"? Who the fuck are you talking about? It isn't 1980 anymore, and these are seasoned NHLers. All of them. Take a look: Kessel, Drury, Rafalski, MILLER - holy shit, eh! And yes, they kicked our (Canada's) ass 5-3 the other night and deserved the top seed going into the Quarterfinals. We'll see how it goes tonight. My suggestion: DVR it, go straight home after the game and watch it later!

Ozzy - who the hell are you? What big debut? Your first goalie fetish webcam perfoemance?

McD
Response:

BY: Ozzy
Feb 23rd, 2010 @ 8:07AM


FIRST! obviously you're not familiar with my volumes of work on the web.

I'm the sucker the Tuckies pull up from Hooksett when the stars align and Canada has a collective sick day.
Response:

Pads and Kids

BY: JTStally
Feb 23rd, 2010 @ 9:23AM


Paul, I still don't get why you have multiple pairs of goalie pads...

I'm sticking to my guns on my statement about the US team, 14 of the team's 23 players are age 25 or under. Sure, it's a very talented group but the biggest difference between the USA and Team Canada: Canada was built to win a Gold Medal THIS year, the US was built to gain experience and compete for A medal with the expectation that with all those young guys learning to play together, they'd be ready to Gold in four years. The vets were well chosen leaders (Drury, Rafalski, Langenbrunner) with proven track records of success that could help bring the young guys together.

Think about it, if all you guys in your 30s (or 40s) view me as a "kid," at age 23, then you'd have to hold the same convictions for the guys on the USA team that are younger than me: both Johnsons, Kane, Ryan, and Kessel.
Response:

BY: Ozzy
Feb 23rd, 2010 @ 9:32AM


Because it didn't occur to me until my 5th set in 2 years that I had a problem...and that I should have just bought bucky pads from the beginning.

As for the Olympics I was hoping when MB30 got his US citizenship he was going to jump ship and back up Miller. Someone should tell Cindy Crosby to get ready for the re-match with the US on the 25th.
Response:

Cindy

BY: JTStally
Feb 23rd, 2010 @ 9:34AM


Someone should tell Cindy Crosby he looks like Kelly Park.
Response:

Cindy?

BY: kpark
Feb 23rd, 2010 @ 1:47PM


Damn that Cindy Crosby is one good looking guy! Unfortunately, I need need to make a case for Stally here. I could be wrong, but I'm pretty sure they said that 22 of the 25 USA players are first time Olympians.....hence Kids.

KP
Response:

If needed ..

BY: Z-Skate
Feb 23rd, 2010 @ 9:05AM


I am reffing (standing around) for the 1st game so I could play for Tuck if they needed skaters .. I always wanted to go to grad. school - do they accept GED's?

I am w/ McCheese on this one .. USA is seasoned maybe not to the years of Canada but they are by means rookies. The youngers US guys beat alot of the younger canadiens in the world jrs., I think.
Response:

the Big & Cheesey ..

BY: Z-Skate
Feb 23rd, 2010 @ 9:10AM


I was thinking about McDonald\'s as I sit and stare out my cubby window and was wondering what did McD\'s ever do w/ the Big & Cheesey? It was basically 2 double cheeseburgers put together ..
Response:

fatty

BY: kpark
Feb 23rd, 2010 @ 2:02PM


Hey fatty, maybe you should think about your big game against Dead River tonight.
Response:

\"I\'M SICK OF TIRED...\"

BY: McG
Feb 23rd, 2010 @ 3:05PM



Response:

Funny shit

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 24th, 2010 @ 6:21AM


McG that was funny. That lil man must have been in the USA locker room the other night, because I felt inspired, and I'M CANADIAN! Obviously I know where your loyalties lie, but what are your thoughts on the tourney so far, and how do you HONESTLY see it playing out. I think it will take a really great game from CAN to beat RUS tonight. And it doesn't get any easier, as I think SWE will be next.
Response:

Actually, he was in the locker room the other night

BY: McG
Feb 24th, 2010 @ 7:41AM


http://www.boston.com/sports/columnists/wilbur/2010/02/team_usa_inspir.html

I think CAN will be tough to beat once they get their shit together, but you've got a lot of tough hockey games ahead. RUS looks real good. I think the advantage the US has is that there's no real pressure on them.
Response:

Need Refs....$70 / game

BY: kpark
Feb 24th, 2010 @ 8:13AM


Hey guys, there is a Tuck tourney this weekend and they are looking for a couple of guys to throw on the stripes. It pays $70 per game. If you are interested, contact Simon McKay: Simon.A.McKay@tuck.dartmouth.edu

We still need ref’s for these three games Saturday.
7:50: Tuck B/Cornell (Union)
9:00: VT Law/HBS B (Union)
9:20: Tuck A/HBS A*** (Campion)
We’re paying $70/game so someone should be interested.
If you don’t mind shooting an e-mail to some other folks I haven’t hit already or posting something on the website that would be great.
Thanks,
Simon
Response:

Scoring the game

BY: JTStally
Feb 25th, 2010 @ 1:52PM


Parky, the other two games had the results posted yesterday, but I've noticed that you haven't managed to find the three-four hours needed to score this one...lol. Take your time.
Response:

Goalie needed for Tuck Tourney Saturday night

BY: smckay4
Feb 26th, 2010 @ 10:22AM


HBS B needs a goalie for their 9PM game Saturday night.
Please shoot me an e-mail if you can help out.
Thanks
Response:

Hi Simon

BY: rgrunds
Feb 27th, 2010 @ 11:32PM


I know it's Sunday and everything, but am I too late to be included? I think it would be fun.
Response:

Too late?

BY: kpark
Feb 28th, 2010 @ 7:37AM


Grundy, you would have been too late even if you were 3 days early.
Response:

Owthatreallyhurtshowcouldyousaythat?

BY: rgrunds
Feb 28th, 2010 @ 7:47AM


especially when I never write anything unfair, critical or inflammatory about ANYBODY.

Actually, I played 3 games last night and saw you against a very nice Babson team. T v. B was a well played game.

Babson had impressive defense.
Response:

Oh crap!

BY: kpark
Feb 28th, 2010 @ 7:52AM


You were there last night? So you saw my 37 turnovers in 36 minutes of hockey. I've become impressively consistent at turning the puck over.

KP
Response:

Oop wrong thread

BY: rgrunds
Feb 28th, 2010 @ 8:03AM


skated well
Feb 28th, 2010 10:01 AM

you looked comfortable.

I think...your style is to play close to the offensive zone into congestion.

I think
Response:

my bad

BY: kpark
Feb 28th, 2010 @ 7:35AM


I left the scoresheet at work, and then had a week from hell at work. I'm working on the write-ups right now. Sorry for the delay fellas!

KP
Response:

skated well

BY: rgrunds
Feb 28th, 2010 @ 8:01AM


you looked comfortable.

I think...your style is to play close to the offensive zone into congestion.

I think...
Response:

Players ..

BY: Z-Skate
Mar 1st, 2010 @ 7:16AM


DR need any skaters for Tuesday night ..?
Response:

HA HA HA HA!

BY: hkydoc
Mar 1st, 2010 @ 10:18AM


Funny, funny, shit! I loved the one about me being sick from eating 3 servings of wings the night before, and the one about Bartline's 15 straight nights of light petting! HA!

Great job, Nords!

McD
Response:

9 goals scored?

BY: JTStally
Mar 1st, 2010 @ 11:00PM


Is that per team? Cause based on the recent Whalers games there are going to be a lot more than that!

It's interesting to actually read a report about how another team plans to beat us, it's a change of pace from two months ago when we got the "snowballs chance in hell" analysis for our team. That said, the Brewers are still in front of us, and, as the article says, they have won all three against us this year, so they should be the favorites until we can prove otherwise.

The biggest change in this game, aside from the addition of Cody, is LT's goaltender. The last game Crowson stood on his head, but I expect to see Bartline in this one, we'll have to see if that changes anything.

Also, for the record, I'm STILL on the Magic Hat bandwagon.
Response:

Don't piss of the Trailers....

BY: kpark
Mar 2nd, 2010 @ 6:47AM


Those guys live & die by that beer. I'm still sticking by my pick, Whalers win 5-4. I think you guys will tighten up your zone as we head towards the playoffs.

Another "Who's who in net?" Barty or Crowson?

KP
Response:

Feiden?

BY: JTStally
Mar 1st, 2010 @ 11:05PM


Do you mean Yacey?

I've been picking against the Nords since their collapse to this team 5 weeks ago. We'll see if they can rally for a shot at second place, but if YACEY is in net, I'd have to give them the advantage. If Osgood's in net, all bets are off!
Response:

Feiden, Yacey, Osgood?

BY: kpark
Mar 2nd, 2010 @ 6:45AM


Stally, what the hell are you talking about? Feiden plays for the 'Blers.

Can we get some info from the Tuckies, who won the oil wrestling contest to play net tonight, Yacey or Kenning?

I heard Grundy is available to play if need be.

KP
Response:

Ugly

BY: JTStally
Mar 1st, 2010 @ 11:08PM


This one could get out of hand fast, after playing with fire the past couple weeks, I don't see the Gamblers waiting until the second half of the game to turn it on.
Response:

D-fence! D-fence!

BY: kirt
Mar 2nd, 2010 @ 8:23AM


Whalers' D will be tightened down this week. We've had substitutes and missing D the last few weeks, but I think everyone is back and healthy now. We'll need to be good back there because goals may be harder to come by this week.
Response:

Whalers' D will be tightened down this week

BY: Z-Skate
Mar 2nd, 2010 @ 11:54AM


Has it ever really been very tight?
Response:

Tight D

BY: kirt
Mar 2nd, 2010 @ 1:50PM


Tight as a wizard's sleeve. I don't know the shots stats, but I know it hasn't been pretty. Tonight we'll be ready to step it up.
Response:

Tonight we'll be ready to step it up

BY: Z-Skate
Mar 2nd, 2010 @ 2:03PM


Yes, Kirt we all know the Whale D can "step-up" haha
Response:

Always....

BY: rgrunds
Mar 2nd, 2010 @ 8:59AM




the oil wrestling sounds like fun too.
Response:

Favorites again??

BY: PaleWhale
Mar 2nd, 2010 @ 9:58AM



Gotta love the whale for hanging in there so far this year and turning it around. Can we start a fan club specifically for our female followers from around the world?
Response:

BY: McG
Mar 2nd, 2010 @ 11:22AM


Kenning gets the start.
Response:

I read it, too, eh.

BY: hkydoc
Mar 2nd, 2010 @ 3:15PM


"The Nords are led by "Super" Jordy McGee who will be called on often to break down Feiden."

We all know you meant Yacey and/or Kenning, and not Feiden, but you typed it and you balls are officially busted!

McD

P.S. I'm gonna eat my weight in wings post-game to make up for missing last week! GET IN MY BELLLLYYYY!


Response:

Rutland Tournament /St. Patrick\'s Weekend /Team needed

BY: rgrunds
Mar 4th, 2010 @ 8:53AM


It\'s should be a good tournament. 3 game guarantee.

A lot of the local Castleton players and alumni will participate.

Three games are guaranteed (1 Friday, 2 Saturday) with Sunday play for the top four teams. There are other good players drawing on the area from Brattleboro, west

They want another team or two. Any participants?

As always, I wanna do it.

Contact Mike Anderson (920)216-3979.
Response:

Reversed Score

BY: JTStally
Mar 4th, 2010 @ 10:47AM


Parky, I'm sure you'll catch this mistake, but DR did not WIN 10-3 like the score currently reads.
Response:

Gonna be a good game

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 5th, 2010 @ 12:45PM


With the Whale coming to play each and every game, I KNOW they'll have it out for us on Tues. The Nords are on a roll right now, and the right time of year to be playing well. The 'Diques are back to playing Nordique hockey, and I personally don't think the Whale will get it done. They DO have some good scorers, and a couple decent defense. But they can't play the entire game, and our bench is full of talent, just waiting to pounce on those HUUUUUGE rebounds in front of LALALALALALALALALALALLALALALALALIERRE!!!!!
Nords win easily...7-3
Response:

.. a talented bench ..

BY: Z-Skate
Mar 7th, 2010 @ 8:46AM


Marshy - I am assuming that's when you are on the ice ..?
Response:

just saying

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 7th, 2010 @ 12:04PM


I know it'll be a hard fought game. I'll do my best to create havoc in front of LaLALLIER, but hopefully you won't steam-roll Park in front like last time, I think you shattered his paper-thin pelvis, and bruised his ego a little. Hopefully he'll still have some swagger left over from playing with the Bruins Alumni to razzle-dazzle some magic, and set up a few goals. You are a tough competitor Z, hopefully you guys bring the pain, because the Nords are on a roll MISTA!!!!
Response:

Nords!

BY: kpark
Mar 8th, 2010 @ 9:09AM


Marshy is right. The Nords are on a roll, but let's be realistic. We beat abysmal Dead River team, a .500 Brewers squad, and a Tuck team that was missing 5 of it's top players.

No disrespect to my Nords, but we still have a ton of work to do to get into playoff shape. This will be one hell of a test, early game where all hands should be on deck.

Z, please don't cut hard to the net because I'm just not smart enough to get out of the way...plus if I die, it will look as though you did it intentionally, and you may go to jail. You probably shouldn't even play.

KP
Response:

Bottom of the barrel

BY: kpark
Mar 8th, 2010 @ 11:05AM


It is official, with 3 games remaining in the regular season, the Whalers have taken the 5th seed in the UVHL, and Dead River is left dead last. Despite both teams taking home an easy forfeit win in the next two weeks at the hands of the Tuckies.

The \'Blers have easily clinched the top spot, now a battle will ensue for 2nd -4th place. Tuck sits atop the list with 25 points, but will take back to back forfeit losses in the next two weeks with most of their roster on spring break. The Nordiques sit at 3rd place with 24 points and the 10-10-0 Brewers in 4th place with 20 points.

It is a battle to the wire, with Tuck & the Brewers facing off in the final game of the regular season. If the Brewers can knock off the Gamblers & Dead River, they will sit just one point behind Tuck.

The Nordiques need 2 of 3 wins in the final weeks against the Whalers, G-Men & Dead River in order to guarantee 2nd place and a first round bye of the playoffs.

Coming down to the wire....you gotta love it!
Response:

Need Skaters for the Late game

BY: kpark
Mar 8th, 2010 @ 6:10PM


Hey guys, it looks like both Tuck & Dead River will be short for the late game tomorrow night, so we are going to open it up and do a scrimmage. If you are interested, let me know, either here or by email kpark@parkcreative.com.

KP
Response:

Pick 'Em

BY: JTStally
Mar 8th, 2010 @ 10:59PM


So, if neither team has enough players, how am I supposed to pick the winner? I'm trying to just go back to the "Make Your Pick" screen and leave this one blank, but that doesn't seem to work either. O well, against my own intuition, I'm banking on the Commish's suggestion and sticking with DR, since theoretically, it could field a full team.
Response:

Scheduling

BY: JTStally
Mar 8th, 2010 @ 11:01PM


Also, it's interesting to note that this is the Oilers SECOND forfeit win against Tuck this year. Coincidentally, it won't have any bearing in the standings, but it's something worth considering when making next year's schedule.
Response:

Hell yeah!

BY: kpark
Mar 9th, 2010 @ 11:50AM


Next year, the Nordiques are playing more games against Tuck!

Pick DR. Guaranteed win!
Response:

No chance in hell for the Brew Crew?

BY: kpark
Mar 9th, 2010 @ 11:50AM


What do you think? Can the Brewers pull it together and make it a game?

I doubt it.

KP
Response:

Oli's Back

BY: JTStally
Mar 9th, 2010 @ 2:54PM


Oli, not Ali, although our small heavyweight should return to the ice tonight like Ali returned to boxing. When he gets one-on-one against Parky, I'll be cheering like the people in the Congo in Will Smith's "Ali": Bumaye Oli!
Response:

Good Game...mostly

BY: JTStally
Mar 10th, 2010 @ 9:57PM


Another solid game between the Nords and the Whalers. I certainly felt that if we could have converted a few chances we missed in the second period we could have swung the momentum our way, but the Diques put up a solid 45 minutes at both ends. We were poised for comeback, but they knew how to step on our heads with three quick goals midway through the third to turn a 4-2 showdown into a 7-2 laugher.

As usual this was one of the cleaner, faster, and more fun games to play. Although the two-handed hack at the end of the game was completely bogus. I lost my head on that one and I'm sorry if I offended anyone, but, to be honest, I was offended that there's a player in the league classless enough to throw a two-handed slash in a game that his team is winning by five goals with 17.2 seconds left. That frustrated me, as I'm sure most of the Nords bench noticed, but I still shouldn't have gone off like I did.
Response:

not sure if you really knew why

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 11th, 2010 @ 5:56AM


Stally, I agree with you, that for the most part, it was a great, clean and mostly fast game. I didn't see you lose it or whatever, but Drew acted accordingly for the most part. I believe he was slashed right before that, and I KNOW Crapser is the type of player that would NOT slash someone for no reason, let alone if we're up by 5 at the end of a game. I didn't see exactly what happened, but I was on the ice, and I was about 20ft away when the slash occurred. I didn't see why Drew slashed him, but I thought I heard him say he was slashed prior to that. Normally our two teams play a good clean game, unless Oliver shows up and gets under a few guys' skin. Hey, everyone loses their cool once in a while, I know I have, and I'm sure it won't be the last time. JT really made a lot of great saves, and you're right, it could have gone either way mid-way through if he hadn't made those saves. Good luck in the playoffs..
Response:

JT was the key

BY: JTStally
Mar 11th, 2010 @ 10:34PM


I agree that JT played a superb game and, even though the final score was lopsided, his play was the difference maker.

I understand that slashes, jabs, elbows, etc. go back and forth, but there's never a reason for a two-handed hack. I was probably only about 10 feet away and he definitely raised the stick to about his shoulders before swinging down Paul Bunyan style on Scotty's ankle. Even a retaliatory slash shouldn't knock the other guy to the ice unless you're swinging with a certain malice.

A few things that added to my frustration were that in the three times I (personally) have played the Nords this season, two different players have taken down Scotty Shaw (one of the league's better skaters) with two-handed hacks...and neither time did the player receive a penalty.

But, oh well, now that I've said my piece, I've moved on. I'd just appreciate that before the Nords speak out against Oliver's antics again, they realize that each team has a few dirty moves, which, in their case, tends to be the two-hander.
Response:

UVHL\'s Most Intimidating Player

BY: JTStally
Mar 10th, 2010 @ 10:11PM


Shawn McDermott: usually known for his lead feet; stay at home tendencies; and ability to down 50 wings at Bentley\'s. The word \"intimidating\" isn\'t the first that comes to mind when thinking about McD.

Like an oceanliner, he takes a few miles to hit a comparable speed, but like an ocenliner, once he hits that speed, the smartest thing to do is get the heck of the way before he shatters your world.

On Tuesday, McD saw his opening to jump into the offense and logged the puck from one of the ice to the other. About the time he hit the red line, I went from a joking mindset (see the first paragraph) to an intimidated mindset (see the second paragraph). At which point I realized that McD (or in this case McOffense) had a full head of steam and had set his course straight in my direction.

Now, I\'m not the biggest or strongest guy in the league, but I refuse to back down to anyone, especially when I\'m defending my own end. But, on Tuesday, I realized that for my own safety, perhaps I should just get out of the way on this one.

...Which leads me to the obvious conclusion that Shawn McDermott and his \"Winged\" Feet make him the most intimidating player in the league!
Response:

True

BY: rgrunds
Mar 11th, 2010 @ 8:27AM


medical journals are filled with case histories of people struck by pallets of chicken wings. It's not pretty.
Response:

brilliant!

BY: kpark
Mar 24th, 2010 @ 12:43PM


Stally, I just got to reading this today! AWESOME! Brilliantly illustrated! An oceanliner, HA. Should his new nickname be Shawn "McCruise Ship" McDermott, or Shawn "McDermott of the Seas" McDermott?

KP
Response:

Nickname

BY: JTStally
Mar 24th, 2010 @ 11:08PM


McCruise Ship was pretty good, you could also throw a curveball and go with TitanMc, since you know that if he catches a tip on the ice, he's going down uncontrollably like a sinking ship...(kinda like you did, Parky, last night trying to retrieve that iced puck).
Response:

Game time

BY: SK8VT
Mar 12th, 2010 @ 7:07AM


if tuck is taking the loss this week then why not move the nords/gamblers game up to the 8:30 slot, im sure most people will hang around after the game for pickup with whalers/tuck if there just messin around..
Response:

Whalers Game

BY: JTStally
Mar 12th, 2010 @ 3:11PM


You can double check with Ken, but I'm pretty sure he had talked to a team that plays over in Hartford on Sunday nights to come give us a scrimmage that night.
Response:

I'm with Jordy

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 12th, 2010 @ 6:16PM


I really don't want to play at 10 if I dont have to. Solid meditation and offerings to the three Holy Commishes hopefully will help.
Response:

Keep the Game times

BY: jt
Mar 13th, 2010 @ 4:56PM


It is too confusing at this point to revamp the schedule. Potter is playing the Whale in the middle tilt and we face the Gamblers in the late one. It is a short commute to the parking lot!

JT
Response:

yeah yeah

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 13th, 2010 @ 5:38PM


See you at 10 on Tues... GAMBLERS GOIN DOWN!!!
Response:

Players Needed Saturday 13th/Spartan Arena/Rutland

BY: rgrunds
Mar 12th, 2010 @ 8:50PM


First game, 10:00 a.m. St. Patrick\'s Day tournament

The organizer wants skaters all day. Would like a goalie too.

Show up or call Mike at 1-920-216-3979.


Response:

THAT was a good skate

BY: rgrunds
Mar 15th, 2010 @ 9:39AM


That was good. You fuckers missed it. I'd take this tournament seriously next year.


Response:

JT, I have to ask you a question about beer

BY: rgrunds
Mar 14th, 2010 @ 2:47PM



Response:

O.K. Never mind

BY: rgrunds
Mar 20th, 2010 @ 11:54AM


Its not that important now.

Marazzo got the hockey mafia voting program.

The fix was in....
Response:

Revision

BY: rgrunds
Mar 21st, 2010 @ 12:43PM


my sources say it wasn't an Italian trick but part of a plan by the International Jewish Conspiracy to control World Finance and Beer too.
Response:

Nords Kill My Pick 'Em

BY: JTStally
Mar 15th, 2010 @ 12:24PM


I used to pick the Nords to win, and then they always lost, so I started picking against them, and they went on a winning streak. After an impressive showing last week, I'm going for the upset here...please don't make me regret this pick, Nords.
Response:

Stally...please pick against us!

BY: kpark
Mar 16th, 2010 @ 9:04AM


We're going for the upset too. Sorry to ruin your Pick 'Ems though. That sucks!
Response:

Finally!

BY: JTStally
Mar 15th, 2010 @ 3:54PM


It's about time we beat Tuck...haha :)
Response:

Dead Numbers

BY: JTStally
Mar 15th, 2010 @ 4:12PM


Will DR have enough guys to make this game competitive?

Did Kurt Cobain tell the truth when he swore he didn't have a gun?

No, I don't think so.
Response:

Tough one

BY: kpark
Mar 16th, 2010 @ 9:05AM


This one does have the makings for an upset, but seeing how awful River Rats have been, I'm going to stick with the Brewers.

KP
Response:

Marazzo?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 16th, 2010 @ 6:42PM


Instead of "MARQUE" I think you meant "MARQUIS" player...Might get a little confusing with the translation. Premiere would describe it best.
Response:

my bad

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 17th, 2010 @ 6:16PM


I guess I meant MARQUEE... Marquis probably means something totally different
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Mar 17th, 2010 @ 7:15AM


Well look on the bright side, atleast we are staying consistant, we were either tied or winning going into the 3rd in 4 of the 5 games this year and blew it, its all about consistency
Response:

League MVP Voting

BY: JTStally
Mar 20th, 2010 @ 9:54PM


All due respect to Yacey and Bayley, but it\'s hard to vote for a player that only played half the season (and that\'s coming from a player that only played half the season!) I think that Marrazzo and Meyer are both solid choices.
Response:

Technically....

BY: kpark
Mar 23rd, 2010 @ 10:02AM


...it was more than half of their teams games played. Yacey has dominated in net and I felt that 12 games was sufficient evidence that he has dominated. Any goalie that lets up less than 3 goals a game in a Men's League is stopping a ton of rubber.

Bayley playing in 14 of his teams 21 games seemed like enough proof as well. We also have to realize that if Bayley doesn't have an Ammel, Marrazzo or Meyer to play with, not to mention a full line of top tier players. Throw Bayley on a line with any two of the MMA line, and you would see his point production sky rocket.
Response:

But, technically...

BY: JTStally
Mar 23rd, 2010 @ 11:38AM


MVP stands for "Most VALUABLE Player." That doesn't necessarily translate to the the BEST player. I believe that to be the most VALUABLE, you need to provide valuable contribution to your team's success week-in and week-out throughout the season. To do this, you not only need to dominate on the ice, but you're contribution should reflect in the overall success of the team. When one team in the league is 19-1-2, it only makes sense that the player most valuable to a team's success played on this team.

I'm not arguing that Bayley and Yacey wouldn't start for a UVHL All Star team, I'm just making the point that they would have been much more valuable to their teams had they made more games, thus making their team's more successful. In Yacey's case: the team is 9-3 in games he's appeared, but it's 3-6-1 in games he didn't; technically, 3-3-1 in games the team PLAYED (didn't forfeit). To pull a baseball statistic, his VORP (value over replacement player) is obviously very high, but, overall, he detracted from his team's value by costing them 3.5 points* in played games he missed.

I do agree with the argument, however, that it's hard to determine the separate values of Meyer and/or Marrazzo when they play on a line with each other and Ammel. But, again, each have appeared in all 22 games for their team so that instantly increases their VALUE to the team's success on the season.

*If you're wondering how I came to the conclusion that Yacey's absences cost the team 3.5 points, here you go:

With Yacey, the team went 9-3 (75%, 1.5 pts/game)

Without him, it went 3-3-1 (50%, 1 pt/game)

It forfeited 3 other games, but we'll throw that out

That means that, each game he missed the team suffered an average loss of 0.5 points (1.5-1)

Over the course of seven games missed, that's 3.5 points (0.5x7)

Clearly you can't get a half of a point, but based on the assumption that Tuck is more likely to win than lose with Yacey in net, round the 3.5 to 4. Those four points are the difference between leading the Nords by 2 points and trailing them by 2 for an important second-place bye.
Response:

funny

BY: kpark
Mar 23rd, 2010 @ 12:43PM


Kind of funny that I never mentioned MVP anywhere, the poll simply states "Who is the BEST player in the UVHL this season?"

You needs to be readin' more better.

KP
Response:

Touche

BY: JTStally
Mar 23rd, 2010 @ 1:21PM


Haha, a victim of my own argument. You at least have to give me some credit for the argument though, I mean, aside from the Tuckies themselves, I don't think there's anyone else that would have had the mathematical patience to calculate the points per game that Yacey's absences cost the team.
Response:

Thanks

BY: stevekenning
Jul 21st, 2010 @ 11:12AM


I'm just picking this up now, trying to kill a little time, and I get to read that Yacey's value to our team suffered only because his VORP was so high.

As the 'RP' for most of this equation, I'd like to say, in all seriousness, thanks a lot. Look to get crushed by the Tuck steamroller next year, both in net, and otherwise.
Response:

Goaltending?

BY: JTStally
Mar 20th, 2010 @ 9:57PM


Which goaltender is taking an extended Spring Break and which one should we expect to see between the pipes for the Businessmen?
Response:

Hopefully...

BY: Garrentee
Mar 22nd, 2010 @ 4:54PM


we get a goaltender at all...Im not going through what we went through last week!!

Fucking Hadley!!
Response:

I love goaltending

BY: rgrunds
Mar 22nd, 2010 @ 6:22PM


it's really fun.
Response:

Nords Win, DR Beats Spread

BY: JTStally
Mar 22nd, 2010 @ 11:23PM


Word on the street is that DR is actually shaping up to put a full contingent of players on the ice this week. That could throw off the prediction a little, but I'm not sure if it's enough to beat a very solid Nords team.
Response:

Good call

BY: kpark
Mar 23rd, 2010 @ 10:04AM


I'll tell you what, playing Dead River scares the crap out of me. You never know what you are going to get, they are definitely dangerous.

All I know is that I'm going to hit Hadley in the head with a blistering 35 MPH slap shot tonight. 35 is fast right?

KP
Response:

The Tale of the Whale?

BY: kpark
Mar 23rd, 2010 @ 10:05AM


No thoughts on this one Stally? Watch out for those fuckers in the 3rd period....they are lethal.

KP
Response:

Poker Face

BY: JTStally
Mar 23rd, 2010 @ 1:39PM


Considering it's my game, you'd think I have something to say, but honestly, it's a good team, and while we've had success, I'm not gonna gamble on saying anything. I'll let my on-ice action do the talking. Simply put, I'm going with my poker face on this one.
Response:

Where were all the Whalers?

BY: hkydoc
Mar 26th, 2010 @ 5:31PM


I reffed this one and was surprised to see only 9 Whalers on the bench for this one. It was still a good game!

McD
Response:

Marshy?

BY: JTStally
Mar 23rd, 2010 @ 11:06AM


The game might also be influenced by whether or not Marshy gets the boot for mouthing off the ref again (like last night's mud league game)...I'm sure he'll get the last laugh on that one though, when he pulls Dick Bursett (sp?) over and is one ticket short of his quota!
Response:

Marshy Marshy Marshy!

BY: kpark
Mar 23rd, 2010 @ 12:44PM


Marshy.....lose his cool? He's been GREAT since firing a puck at the ref in Season 1!

How's Mud-League going? Competition any good? I completely forgot about it this year.

KP
Response:

AND....

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 23rd, 2010 @ 2:09PM


I apologized to gary Laperle...just for the record
Response:

WTF?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 23rd, 2010 @ 2:09PM


I don't remember blasting out any ref in recent memory???? Nor did I get the "pulling over" comment? what's that all about Stally?
Response:

It wasn't Marshy

BY: JTStally
Mar 23rd, 2010 @ 2:24PM


Now that I've soiled your good name, perhaps it wasn't you. The guys in the locker room afterward said it was Marshy, and I didn't ask questions, but it was actually the defenseman for the Nords with the raggedy old cage that works as a state trooper in NH.

Sorry again for the confusion.
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Mar 23rd, 2010 @ 2:34PM


it was actually rob pellatier or however u spell his last name but it really wasnt mouthing off to the ref, him and another player got into a little scuffle where he was gonna get tossed so i think he just threw in a little F bomb to the ref as a parting gift
Response:

Mud League

BY: JTStally
Mar 23rd, 2010 @ 1:25PM


Mud league is quite competitive this year. My IceHawks, which includes Sean "The Claw" Clauson, Tyler "Obvious Nickname" Dickinson, and Marty "No Nickname Needed" White started off 3-0 before last nights loss the Northstars. We'd beat them on Friday, but the replacement of McD with Robert Ammel was a difference maker for the N-stars offensive prowess. The CCM team is strong as always.
Response:

JT Stally

BY: rgrunds
Mar 23rd, 2010 @ 1:43PM


Do any teams need a goalie? I'm available on a regular or fill-in basis.

Disregard any remarks Kelly makes about my skills.

BG

Response:

Grundy Goalie

BY: JTStally
Mar 23rd, 2010 @ 6:34PM


I don't think so, but you'd be better off calling Campion Rink and checking to see if there is a team that needs goaltending help.
Response:

JT not goalie

BY: rgrunds
Mar 23rd, 2010 @ 6:49PM


Yeah, I called them a couple hours ago. The rink attendant was a good guy and took my number.

thanks again.

BG
Response:

Big Tom

BY: hkydoc
Mar 26th, 2010 @ 5:29PM


It was Tom Dakai who got kicked out of the Mud League game by Dick Bressett on Monday night. I was still at work and had to miss the game unfortunately, because I would have paid good $ to see that!

Oh, you are right Stally - Dan Ammel is much more of a game-changer than I am , that is for sure!!! But, he didn't replace me in the line-up. That was a really good game on Friday night that ended 3-1 with the empty netter. I was very impressed with the Ice Hawks. Clauson looks like Bobby Orr in the B League!

McD
Response:

Orr vs. Chara

BY: JTStally
Mar 26th, 2010 @ 8:19PM


I view as him more as a Chara-type, but perhaps that's just cause he's about six inches taller than everyone else on the ice. The Northstars, along with CCM, are certainly some of our strictest competition in the league.
Response:

Playoff Predictions

BY: JTStally
Mar 26th, 2010 @ 3:12PM


It\'s that time of year again, it\'s playoff hockey time in the UVHL. What doe you guys think? Who\'s going to take it all? Can anybody end the Gamblers dominance? Here\'s a look at my UVHL Bracket.

PRELIMINARY ROUND

4. Brewers (11-12-0) vs 5. Whalers (7-14-2)

The Brew Crew owned the Whale this season, winning all four meetings between the teams and LT was the only team the Whalers didn\'t earn a single point against. However, all the games were close, with two being decided by a goal, and the Whalers improved significantly this season. Sooner or later, the odds state that the Whalers should break through in an evenly matched game, and unfortunately, that might just come at the wrong time for the Brewers.

Whalers 4, Brewers 3

3. Tuck (13-9-1) vs 6. Dead River (5-17-1)

Tuck literally gave two games to DR this year (two of DR\'s five wins came via Tuck forfeit), but that doesn\'t count for much when the Tuckies are on the ice. In the three times they faced, the Businessmen owned like their CEO-genotype, winning 3-1, 9-0, and 6-2. If Dead River fields it\'s full team, it should be at least competitive, but with a solid goalie at one end playing against a defensively inept team at the other, this one has route written all over it.

Tuck 7, Dead River 2

SEMIFINALS

2. Nordiques (13-7-3) vs 3. Tuck

This should be an excellent matchup. The Nords finished two points ahead of Tuck, but that discounts the three forfeit losses Tuck suffered against the bottom of the league (2 vs. Dead River, 1 vs. Whalers) during class breaks. This matchup is tough to analyze. After a winning 3-2 and 1-1 (S0) in the first two, the Nords lost a laughable 7-2 game before coming back to close the series with a 6-3 win. The secret sauce is Dan Yacey, as the Nords only faced him twice this year. As a former netminder for the Big Green, you have to expect he\'ll bring his best for the bigger games. For the Nords to beat Yacey, John Turner will have to match him save for save.

Tuck 3, Nordiques 2

1. Gamblers (20-1-2) vs 5. Whalers

Despite it\'s lopsided look, this is a very intriguing matchup. The Gamblers only gave up 10 points to opponents all year, the Whalers earned five of them: handing them their only loss, as well as splitting two shootout decisions. That said the Gamblers did go 20-1-2 this season and can\'t be considered the underdog. However, if the Whalers can bring a top notch defense (something that has been inconsistent) and score on Feiden (they\'ve scored 12 goals in the last two meetings), they have a fair shot at the upset. Still, you have to give the advantage to the MMA line until proven otherwise.

Gamblers 6, Whalers 4

CHAMPIONSHIP

1. Gamblers vs 3. Tuck

Aside from the Whalers, Tuck is the only other team to mar the Gamblers record, as they won a 4-4 shootout. In the most recent meeting, Tuck led the Gamblers 3-1 going into the third before succumbing to four unanswered goals. Again, Yacey will be the key. He only appeared in the first game against the Gamblers and has the ability to grapple with MMA. It also can\'t be underestimated that a game at Campion Rink is just five minutes from the Dartmouth campus and the Tuck student body. Without knocking Feiden, Yacey\'s superior goaltending will be the defining factor in this game, which could prove to be a run-and-gun.

Tuck 5, Gamblers 4

BOLD PREDICTION:

Obviously my prediction is that if Yacey plays every game for Tuck, Tuck raises the Whalen Cup. If he doesn\'t, they won\'t.

As a bonus bold prediction, I\'ll go as far as saying that the winner of the Nordiques-Tuck semifinal wins the title. The Nordiques have played the Gamblers well, and, like the even but apparently lopsided Brewers-Whalers battles, it\'s time the Nords broke through and I think the Gamblers are ripe for an upset.
Response:

Amazing analysis!!!

BY: hkydoc
Mar 26th, 2010 @ 5:19PM


Stally:

This is the best UVHL analysis that I have ever read from a player and is equal (maybe better...) to what Park and I publish. I am VERY impressed. It is wonderful to have you as a regular FORUM contributor!

McD
Response:

Thanks

BY: JTStally
Mar 26th, 2010 @ 8:22PM


It's been fun being a part of the forums and keeping up the intensity of the league. Without sounding cocky, since I'm pursuing a field in sports reporting/analysis, it's a positive sign that you appreciate my analysis :)
Response:

Nice predictions....

BY: kpark
Mar 27th, 2010 @ 6:09PM


but, what about the Bronze medal game? Nordiques VS Whalers? Since you love reporting/analysis, feel free to do ANY write-ups you want!

KP
Response:

Sportswriter Stally?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 27th, 2010 @ 7:01PM


I have contributed to Bleacherreport.com a few times. Check out the few articles I've written there. Good opportunity to have REAL sports editors to read and critique your work. Also, there's quite a few good articles. I think your playoff analysis was fair, but inaccurate. If the Nords play a good-two way game the opportunities will come, and they WILL beat Tuck. We also need Turner to fend off what few shots we allow them. If we keep them away from the front of our net, Turner should be able to turn aside any shots with ease. Good Luck against the Whale Stally, If McDreamy and McSteamy show up with the Alaskan between the pipes, you had better bring your "A" game!
Response:

Man-hole, not 5-hole!

BY: hkydoc
Mar 26th, 2010 @ 5:23PM


HA HA HA HA! Great line! I fucking love it, Parky!

McD
Response:

Whalers?

BY: JTStally
Mar 26th, 2010 @ 8:18PM


I think Joey was sick, Jay and Scott are both regulars but they couldn't be there for whatever reason (we knew ahead of time). Haven't seen Oliver in about a month, it's certainly confused Parky's stripes as he has no idea which Whaler to put in the box now. We expect to be back at full strength for the playoffs (although there's no guarantee on Oliver).
Response:

No Trash Talk Yet!?

BY: JTStally
Mar 30th, 2010 @ 12:44AM


I agree: the goaltending will be the key. If Kenny can keep us in there, we should be able to pull it out; that said, our biggest struggles against the Brewers have come in putting the puck in the net. I feel like we should be able to put more in on Bartline than we have (statistically he gives up almost 4.5 goals/game), but we have yet to do so, and will have to score at least 4, if we plan on winning.
Response:

Help Lallier

BY: rgrunds
Mar 30th, 2010 @ 10:41AM


if the D watches the open side and passing zones, the fish could win.

Offense starts on defense.

There's a party in your mouth...everybody's coming......
Response:

You Forget

BY: vtdownhiller
Mar 30th, 2010 @ 11:13AM


The Brewer's are a complete team, speed and skill on the offense as well as the most underated defense in the league and probably the best goaltender on any team. My feeling is that the Brewer's have been tanking it all season and will only now bring on the A game
Response:

Best Goalie in the League...

BY: JTStally
Mar 30th, 2010 @ 11:16AM


is Dan Yacey. If you don't know that, you should clean the substance out of your pipe...or you should have paid attention to last week's Brew-Tuck game when he completely shut the door on the Trailers.
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Mar 30th, 2010 @ 11:20AM


Sure when Yacey is on he's on...Went Bartline is on, it's lights out
Response:

ahh, the trash...

BY: kpark
Mar 30th, 2010 @ 1:21PM


I love the trash talk. I think I'm picking the Whalers in this one. Brew Crew is in shambles.

Is anyone missing from either team?
Response:

Assist

BY: stevekenning
Apr 1st, 2010 @ 6:58PM


Are you %$^*ing kidding? I get my first career assist and I have to suffer the indignity of seeing that Yacey got the second? Brutal, the kid has completely ruined my year.

YACEY!!!
Response:

New Organization for Hadley

BY: rgrunds
Apr 2nd, 2010 @ 12:14PM


SNBAGHIF

small, nude boys against GH\'s infected penis.
Response:

Grundy ..

BY: Z-Skate
Apr 2nd, 2010 @ 12:16PM


What the &^%$ is wrong with you? You take goalies being strange to a whole new level.
Response:

No, you don't understand

BY: rgrunds
Apr 2nd, 2010 @ 3:25PM


Actually, I am quite normal...Yes, I checked....I am a normal....Hawaiian...that's it.


Goalieness is separating....

By the way, why don't you pick up your phone. I'm trying to start a new business south of Woodstock and was interested in your condo, until I called about 8 times with no response.

Response:

Didn't you see the write-up ?

BY: rgrunds
Apr 2nd, 2010 @ 3:27PM


That was hilarious. Kelly speculated that Hadley's excellent performance was an attempt to impress a girl...or a boy.

ha ha...
Response:

How about...

BY: hkydoc
Apr 2nd, 2010 @ 8:28PM


"Goalie that brings his A-game for the playoffs" or "Goalie that played his best UVHL game ever in the 2010 Quarterfinals" as new organizations for Hads?

GREAT GAME, HADS!!!

McD
Response:

Grundy falls short of making UVHL Team AGAIN.

BY: ghadley
Apr 25th, 2010 @ 9:42AM


thats funny grundy, however 3 knee surgies in the year 1/2.........come on.... last time I looked you still havent made a UVHL Team??????? I do however remember i was reffing for your try out game and you lost by dbl digits if i recall?? We were kidding on the bench that night to just shoot and it doesn't even need to be on net it will find the back of it on its own!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! anytime pal ill give you a infected penis, come down here and be my back up bitch>>>>>>>>>>
Response:

You Stop That

BY: rgrunds
Apr 25th, 2010 @ 11:17AM


Down boi...down.

I think I made that post about a month ago. Did it take you that long to learn the alphabet?

Anyway, I was always one of your great defenders in your injured state. I never really understood why you jeopardized your health by coming back so early. You must have been hurting, plus it takes time to get back in practice.

Plus, the defeat against Tuck was a 7-3 game during which I had about 50 shots and 5 breakaways. Not double digits....no...not even a little bit. I think double digits are your realm. But, injuries ARE an excuse. Even if it is searing pain, swelling and discharge from your OWN unit.

Thanks for the invitation, but I've had better offers from better looking girls.

Take care of that knee.....see you on the ice. I'll be sure to give you the puck after I stop your shot.

ES
Response:

DR, Numbers?

BY: JTStally
Apr 3rd, 2010 @ 10:58PM


It sounded like our Whaler crew was interested in skating, but I know that DR has had trouble getting numbers, and considering this is a 10 pm game that means nothing, it'd be surprising if the cavalry showed up for this one.

What's the deal? Will you guys have enough players? Let Kenny know so he can see if the Potter team might be interested in scrimmaging us again.
Response:

no way

BY: vtdownhiller
Apr 6th, 2010 @ 8:31AM


That was a very biased pre-game write up. I will say it now...There is no way the Nordinks win this game, let alone go into ovetime...
Response:

Biased?

BY: kpark
Apr 6th, 2010 @ 11:16AM


Really? The Nordinks have won 3 of 4 meetings this year, how is that biased? CJ, you are retarded.
Response:

yes

BY: vtdownhiller
Apr 6th, 2010 @ 1:44PM


we shall see who is the retarded one after the game
Response:

GO NORDS!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 6th, 2010 @ 11:28AM


I'm not ready for golf yet, so lets bring it tonight! YAAAHHHH!!!
Response:

what about this one CJ?

BY: kpark
Apr 6th, 2010 @ 11:35AM


CJ? No thoughts on this one? Is it biased because the Gamblers SPANKED you guys in all 5 games this season?

I hope it's a close one.
Response:

Biased as well

BY: vtdownhiller
Apr 6th, 2010 @ 1:47PM


This one is biased against the Brew Crew, because of your hatred for us, our superior players and aggressive play. Something tells me this one will be a shocker, and you go 0-2 on your predictions...
Response:

Goalie for Pick-up April 13

BY: rgrunds
Apr 6th, 2010 @ 4:13PM


I wanna play!

I can go two....bring it on....

ES
Response:

The Stick

BY: JTStally
Apr 6th, 2010 @ 5:06PM


Nothing biased about referring to Bayley as "The Stick," although I think "Dirty Stick" might be more fitting and more for what the connotation you were looking for Kelly. After last week when he knocked two Whalers sticks out in the third period with overhead hacks and the cross check to my back that made sitting in the car on a four-hour drive to NJ miserable, he's definitely got one filthy stick!
Response:

Great game, Tuckies.

BY: hkydoc
Apr 6th, 2010 @ 10:47PM


You had us VERY scared with the comeback, especially with the 5th goal. Great game, clean, fast, and you guys were a class act as always. We were fortunate to hold you off for the win.

See you next week for the Bronze, and then on the 18th for the UVHL Canada-USA game.

McD
Response:

Big upset, Brew Crew!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 6th, 2010 @ 10:48PM


Congrats on making it to your first Whalen Cup Final! We'll see you next week, eh!

McD
Response:

stally knows Bailey

BY: vtdownhiller
Apr 8th, 2010 @ 4:50AM


He's right Bailey has one dirty stick! It's a good thing he works in a hospital, one quick shot should take care of it.
Response:

Classic battle!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 8th, 2010 @ 4:22PM


This is gonna be a good one, and it isn't even for 3rd Place this time!!! I'm looking forward to the challenge of earning a third Whalen Cup for the Nordiques.

McD
Response:

Classic battle, indeed

BY: bayley
Apr 9th, 2010 @ 12:20PM


Palmer-Nicklaus, 'Niners-Cowboys, McEnroe-Connors...this is right up there as one of the greatest rivalries in all of sport.

Like I said to Parky after the games last week...I couldn't think of a better way to end a UVHL career than Nords vs. Brewers for the Whalen Cup. Should be a good one fellas...best of luck.

(Obligatory) prediction: Not sure of the score, but a vision came to me in a dream last night of Alfonse - still in Brewers uniform - snorting a Coke-can-sized line of blow out of the Whalen Cup, whilst on stage at Shenanigans. Captain Poirier was ripping body shots off Bartline, and Dano repeatedly muttered the word "whoooore" as he extinguished his cigar on the small of a stripper's back. It went on for hours.

Remember:

"If you will it, it is no dream." - Walter, The Big Lebowski

Response:

Classic!

BY: kpark
Apr 10th, 2010 @ 1:20PM


Bayles, that is a beautiful dream, but for the sake of the Upper Valley, I will try to make sure it doesn't happen, because nobody wants to see anyone doing body shots off of that big pasty nerd Bartline!

KP
Response:

Hey Retard!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Apr 8th, 2010 @ 7:36PM


Guess you'll need mommy to attach some velcro to that helmet of yours, get yourself stuck to the window on the short bus, so you don't do any further damage to that swelled head of yours...Now, here's a prediction for ya CJ. I PERSONALLY predict, that you won't score 1 goal, at least while I'm on the ice. And if you do, it'll be off your leg and past Bartline. Nice prediction on the game Vs. Tuck, any ideas how Tues. will turn out?
Response:

Marshy

BY: rgrunds
Apr 9th, 2010 @ 12:27PM


Glad to know you have retained your menacing persona.

Just to prove I'm not a sociopath, I'm gonna give you some plastic explosive I've accumulated. You and Hadley can shape it into a puck and go from there.

See? I'm sharing. That must prove SOMEthing...

P.S. I like the short bus, it's the leg-irons and chains that are vexing....

ES
Response:

Championship game

BY: PaleWhale
Apr 11th, 2010 @ 3:57PM


This should be a good one. I generally like the 'diques better as a "non-douche bag" team, but am going to give the edge to the Brewers. It looks like they hit their stride at the right time. Plus, I would feel better if the team that beat us wins the cup.
Response:

Non-douche bag team...?

BY: Garrentee
Apr 13th, 2010 @ 9:02AM


Isnt every team that your not on a douche bag team?

Well said Al!!

And yes I will be doing shots off bartlines pasty white abs!!
Response:

A Classic redux

BY: vtdownhiller
Apr 12th, 2010 @ 7:09AM


I am not sticking my neck out on this one. Both teams will get shots, both teams have great goaltending both teams move the puck well, one team will take penalties, one team will use their sticks like tomahawks, one team will complain alot and one team will win. Both teams will drink in the parking lot but I will say this, and it is completely biased, Brewers 6-4.
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Apr 13th, 2010 @ 7:10AM


PUMPED! Gonna be a good game...So any bonuses in that Brewer contract if you bring that Cup back to the home town Brewery
Response:

What, no pre-game chatter?

BY: hkydoc
Apr 13th, 2010 @ 2:02PM


Huh? Don't you guys even care about 3rd Place honors? This is a real game, so don't forget to show up.

McD
Response:

Who to root for?

BY: JTStally
Apr 13th, 2010 @ 3:28PM


On one hand, I just don't like the Brewers, and 82 PIMs to the Brewers' league leading 167 says the Nords are, as previously implied, a "lesser douche bag" team. But could I really put up with a whole year of Parky's bragging about how, despite his poor -3 defense and 6 missed shots in the championship, he won the Whalen Cup?...I guess so, I mean he acts like a giddy kid, but a kid always has big dreams!...Go Nords!
Response:

That Was Really Fun

BY: rgrunds
Apr 14th, 2010 @ 12:18AM


That pick-up was really fun. Plus, I got to see all my favorite cartoon characters....Shelly Park, McD and that manly Marshy.

What about next week? Is that it for ice?

ES
Response:

Now I know!!

BY: Garrentee
Apr 14th, 2010 @ 4:45PM


Now I know why we beat the Nords...Parky couldnt take his eyes off Bayls!!

[IMG]http://i61.photobucket.com/albums/h43/garrentee/IMG_3123-Edit.jpg[/IMG]
Response:

BY: Garrentee
Apr 14th, 2010 @ 4:45PM


Photobucket
Response:

HA HA HA!

BY: kpark
Apr 14th, 2010 @ 6:35PM


That is priceless! Awesome Garren! HA HA HA!
Response:

OMG

BY: The Dark Canuck
Apr 14th, 2010 @ 7:38PM


Nice shot Garren...Who's idea was the photo anyway?
You guys played hard, and really deserved the win...Congratultions
But I promise you this. If you EVER check me like that from behind again, I WILL drop my gloves, stick and helmet and punch you in the face, until you pass out. Not cool Garren. Clean up your game.

Response:

HA!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 14th, 2010 @ 9:46PM


That is fucking hilarious! What a riot, and what a great way to end a famous UVHL career in jock, helmet, and with beer in hand.

McD
Response:

Congrats, Brewers!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 14th, 2010 @ 9:49PM


Nice job on winning your first ever Whalen Cup in your first appearance in the UVHL Finals. You guys deserved it and had a great playoffs peaking at the right time. If it couldn't be us, I'm glad it was you guys. Enjoy the feeling, it never gets old even though we do.

McD
Response:

Thanks McD

BY: vtdownhiller
Apr 15th, 2010 @ 12:16PM


It was a hard fought game, you could tell both teams wanted it and could have gone either way. The Whalen cup as it turns out is a little bit of a lightweight and couldn't handle all the long trail being drunk from it. It got a little tipsy and had a minor fall right before it passed out at Denny's into his scrambled eggs at 3am. Nothing that a quick bath and nursing couldn't take care of.
Thanks for a great season!
Response:

Brewers....Congrats

BY: kpark
Apr 15th, 2010 @ 1:42PM


Congrats to the BREW CREW! It really is a feat to finish the season under .500 and pull it together and trounce the top two teams for the cup. You are officially now the most hated team in the UVie though.

Secondly, what do you think of the new homepage slider congratulating the Brewers? I think my favorite part of it is the Billy Fletcher with Rod Blagojevich hair. Also Poirier as the devil is pretty good too.

Congrats.
Response:

It's about time!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 17th, 2010 @ 7:33PM


Jeez...it took you guys long enough to finish something higher than 4th! Congrats, eh, you were the best team in the playoffs, AND you beat us 4 out of 5 times this season. Oh, FYI: make sure you wash the Whalen Cup right after you have Bleu Cheese in it or it will tarnish.

McD
Response:

Canada USA

BY: habman
Apr 15th, 2010 @ 6:39PM


Any pick\'em post for the Canada USA game?
Response:

DONE!

BY: kpark
Apr 16th, 2010 @ 6:33AM


Go ahead and Pick 'Em.
Response:

BY: habman
Apr 16th, 2010 @ 10:01AM


Any sponsor prize for the Pick 'Em winner? Maybe next year chuck a prize in there and more people would pick?
Response:

Prize!

BY: kpark
Apr 16th, 2010 @ 10:05AM


Unfortunately not this year. I contacted Stateline, but they wouldn't even call me back....assholes.

I even contacted a couple of online hockey stores, HockeyMonkey.com & HockeyGiant.com, but no luck there. Next year, we'll definitely have a prize.
Response:

5 Olde Postgame

BY: JTStally
Apr 16th, 2010 @ 12:46PM


I will be behind the bar at 5 Olde on Sunday night, which means deals can be had after the game. Just so we're clear: all American beers will be discounted, all non-American beers will be inflated, and everyone, including Team Top Hat, will be expected to pay in American currency, since the Canadian dollar isn't worth as much.
Response:

Hell Yeah!

BY: kpark
Apr 16th, 2010 @ 1:43PM


Stally, count me in! I'll try to rally the troops. How late are you serving food until?
Response:

Yeah, Stally!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 16th, 2010 @ 2:21PM


Sounds great! Thanks, eh! I'll definitely slum it with some Bud Light if its gonna be cheap.

McD
Response:

Food?

BY: JTStally
Apr 18th, 2010 @ 1:23AM


We usually close the kitchen around 9 on Sundays because it is quiet. But, I'll talk to the chef and have him show me how to turn off the frialator. It shouldn't be too much trouble for me to fry an order of wings for you guys when you come in around 10:30 or so.
Response:

New Facebook Fan Page & RSS Feed

BY: kpark
May 4th, 2010 @ 3:03PM


Hey guys, I\'ve just added a new facebook fan page, so make sure to check it out and \"Like It\". I wrote some code that will pull in all of the headlines, Player of the Week, Forum Thread, etc into facebook which will allow guys to be notified of new content without having to go to UVHL.com.

For those of you that like using RSS Feeds for updates, I\'ve also created a feed here, http://www.uvhl.com/rss.php, that will pull in all of the updates.

Thanks,

KP
Response:

Union Arena Golf Tourney

BY: kpark
May 6th, 2010 @ 11:35AM


Hey guys & gals, the Union Arena is having a golf tournament at the Woodstock Country Club on June 11th and are looking for some players. Proceeds go to the Union Arena. Foursomes & Individuals are welcome, so make sure you come out and support the Union Arena.

The cost is $125 per person and includes 18 holes of golf, cart, t-shirt, diner & auction. Each participant will qualify for all contests: Longest Drive, Straightest Drive, Closest to the Pin & Hole in One Challenge.

They are also looking for Hole Sponsors, which is apparently pretty cheap. Contact Vic at the Union Arena (802) 457-9128 or register online at UnionArena.org

Respond below if you are looking for a foresome, are planning on attending or are just plain bored.

Thanks,
Kelly
Response:

Caddy anyone?

BY: The Dark Canuck
May 14th, 2010 @ 1:11PM


I would happily take a Sat. out of my busy schedule to drive someone around in their golf cart, as long as they buy the beers all day.
This is no joke, not only would I be a great caddy, but I can roll your joints for you too! As long as I can help smoke 'em.
No Natty Ice or Commercial smoke...I am one high-priced hooker
So, Long Trail, and some BC Bud outta do it...
Response:

HA HA HA!

BY: kpark
May 19th, 2010 @ 12:06PM


Marshy, that is too funny man!
Response:

Season 8, Jerseys, Rosters & Sponsors

BY: kpark
Jul 13th, 2010 @ 2:04PM


It\'s never too early to start thinking about hockey, and with local rinks starting to open in 2 months, and the UVHL\'s opening night in less than 3 months, captains need to start thinking about some things:

1. Jerseys: If your team is planning on getting new jerseys, you should be ordering them now so that they are here by the start of the season.

2. Recruiting: As almost every team is losing some players, you should be thinking about filling those roster spots. Every year we have a couple of guys requesting to be put on a team, so we may work out some sort of \"mock draft\" for the new talent.

3. Sponsorships: run it by your boss, your business partner, your local tavern, your wife...anyone who will help subsidize the cost of your team\'s season. Now is the time to start thinking about it, so you can get patches or logos put on your jerseys to support your sponsor. All sponsors will get a link on UVHL.com as well.

4. Get in shape you fatties. I\'ve seen some of you, and the offseason has NOT been kind. Go for a walk, stop after the 3rd piece of cake...you disgusting mess.

That\'s about it, oh, and we are on facebook now, so make sure you friend us: http://www.facebook.com/UVHL1 for league updates, news & info.

Thanks,
Kelly
Response:

Summer Ice in Rutland

BY: vtdownhiller
Jul 13th, 2010 @ 2:19PM


So here it is the moment we\'ve all been waiting for: SUMMER ICE. We are busy laying the ice as I speak. We are going to have drop-in hockey every Friday night at 8 p.m. 10$ a session. Tell everyone as I do not have everyone\'s e-mails. Tell them to e-mail me so I can get their e-mails for this winter. Starts this coming Friday July 16.

From: \"Brian Smith\"

Response:

goalies

BY: rgrunds
Jul 15th, 2010 @ 6:49AM


How are you set for goalies? My girlfriend is in that area and I see her on weekends?

BG
802-851-1120
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Jul 15th, 2010 @ 12:04PM


Call Brian Smith at the Sparton Arena and ask him, I am sure goalies are always needed, it is an open skate so just show up, sometimes we have three goalies there and they rotate through
Response:

Pre-Season Skates?

BY: kpark
Aug 24th, 2010 @ 11:47AM


Hey Fatties,
It\'s time to start thinking about getting in shape for the upcoming UVHL season. McDermott & I will be putting together some ice-time in September & early October @ Campion Rink in West Lebanon to work the kinks out of our games.

The price will most likely be the same as last year, around $15 per skate if you sign up early and for all skates. We\'ll have more details shortly, but wanted to get the word out. We\'ll be taking the first 26 skaters that pay.

Who\'s in?

KP
Response:

yeah

BY: rgrunds
Aug 24th, 2010 @ 11:56AM


if you need a goalie.
Response:

How many skates?

BY: kpark
Aug 24th, 2010 @ 6:19PM


Hey guys, how many skates would you prefer from 9/11/2010 - 10/12/2010? Roughly a month, we can pack up to 10 skates in there, which seems a bit much, but most likely 8 or 6 is the best option.

Give me some feedback about what you guys would prefer.
Response:

Im In

BY: The Dark Canuck
Aug 24th, 2010 @ 8:54PM


I could likely do a couple per week depending on the night. Fridays don't work for me, but mostly any other night.
Response:

Losing my mind!!!!!

BY: jt
Aug 30th, 2010 @ 10:16PM


I had to resort to jazzercise DVDs, laps around the little pool at the aquatic center and straight espresso! I need help in the form of Hockey. See you boys on the ice on the 12th.

Thanks for the UVHL

JT
Response:

JT

BY: rgrunds
Aug 31st, 2010 @ 8:19AM


You're a mess.

Get it together.

Jesus.
Response:

Free Goalie Skates

BY: rgrunds
Aug 26th, 2010 @ 8:03AM


Size 9 CCM tacks. Used.


Response:

Running out of time!

BY: kpark
Aug 30th, 2010 @ 11:20AM


We only have a couple of spots left....who wants in?

KP
Response:

let me know

BY: rgrunds
Aug 31st, 2010 @ 8:22AM


I imagine you are going to give priority to league goalies.

That's fine.

Just let me know if I'm going to play or not on the 12th.

ES


Response:

That's a fact!

BY: kpark
Aug 31st, 2010 @ 2:29PM


Sorry grundonator. We have 6 league goalies that all want in on this and we can only take 4 each night, tops.

but if something opens up, I would love to boost my confidence by shooting on you for 1.5 hours.

KP
Response:

Kelly, You Sad and Delusional victim

BY: rgrunds
Aug 31st, 2010 @ 7:40PM


You poor person.

Your shots never go further than the front of my glove.


Everybody, be as nice as possible to Kelly because he needs it.
Response:

Used Hockey Equipment

BY: Z-Skate
Aug 30th, 2010 @ 3:02PM


Where can I get used equipment .. Is the closest playit again Sam\'s in Burlington?
Response:

equipment?

BY: kpark
Aug 31st, 2010 @ 7:06AM


I've got an old jock that I'm not using anymore, but I'm not going to sell it to YOU, because you might enjoy it too much.

KP
Response:

BY: vtdownhiller
Sep 10th, 2010 @ 5:06PM


what are you looking for Z? there is a replay sports in rutland as well
Response:

Don Cherry is spot on

BY: MASSHOLE
Aug 31st, 2010 @ 2:07PM


You\'ve got to love this Guy!! DON CHERRY of hockey night in Canada , was asked on a local live radio talk show, just what he thought about the allegations of torture of suspected terrorists. His reply prompted his ejection from the studio, but to thunderous applause from the audience.



HIS STATEMENT:

\"If hooking up one rag head terrorist prisoner\'s testicles to a car battery to get the truth out of the lying little camel shagger will save just one Canadian life,
then I have only three things to say:

\'Red is positive, black is negative, and make sure his nuts are wet.\"

Response:

What?

BY: kpark
Aug 31st, 2010 @ 2:28PM


He REALLY couldn't have said that! I want the video!

Don Cherry is priceless. I'm not saying he's right....just priceless.
Response:

Never said it

BY: McG
Aug 31st, 2010 @ 2:31PM


http://www.snopes.com/politics/quotes/bechtol.asp
Response:

Cherry for Prime Minister!

BY: hkydoc
Sep 3rd, 2010 @ 4:31PM


Even if he didn't say it, Don Cherry has my vote!

McD
Response:

Just read it

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 6th, 2010 @ 7:27PM


Thanks McGovern...it DID sound like something Don might say, but I don't think he's stupid enough to say that on live radio, or let himself be quoted that for a press release. Don Cherry could realistically run for mayor in just about any Canadian town or city and have at least a 50/50 shot. He is loved dearly by most Canadians for his "tell it like it is" mentality, and he definitely wears his heart on his sleeve when it comes to Canadian families of fallen troops. His comments may offend some, but most of them are the truth...like it or not!
Response:

Hockey Coach Needed!

BY: kpark
Sep 9th, 2010 @ 1:11PM


Hey guys,
The Woodstock Youth Hockey program is in Dire need of some help. They are looking for any help they can find for their Bantam team this fall. Head coach, Assistant Coach, Part Time help....anything.

If you know of anyone that could help out, pass this along to them.

Thanks,
Kelly
Response:

VT Pond Hockey Tourney in Feb.

BY: Z-Skate
Sep 9th, 2010 @ 2:02PM


http://www.vermontpondhockey.com/competition.html
Response:

...hhhhmmmmm...

BY: kpark
Sep 9th, 2010 @ 4:36PM


Definitely IN!
Response:

Also IN

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 9th, 2010 @ 7:53PM


Beers at my place boys...before, during and after...What the heck...I'l even fire up the grill..Lake Morey is literally 3mins from my house...Let's get a good turnout from the UVHL....I may even have a Guys/Cardnight including mayhem at Marshy's Inn Near the Lake! Sounds good to me!
Who's in???
Response:

UVHL Pricing for 2010-11

BY: hkydoc
Sep 9th, 2010 @ 9:28PM


It looks like we\'ve just set the budget for the 2010-11 season. Ice time went up at both rinks this season.

***PLEASE NOTE: The Team Fee discounts do NOT apply if you give us individual checks for the discounted amount. They only count if you pay with ONE check or PayPal transaction for the FULL amount by OCTOBER 9th. No exceptions, we have enough shit to do to. Thanks for your cooperation, eh.

Full Price Individual Registration:

$19.00 per game X 26 games = $494.00 per individual

Cash, check, or PayPal.

PLUS you pay for your own USA Hockey registration in all scenarios.

PayPal Team Discount:

7.5% discount if the entire team pays in FULL by OCTOBER 9th with ONE PayPal transaction for the MINIMUM 15 PLAYER ROSTER

PayPal Discount Team Fee is: $7,410.00 - $555.75 = $6,854.25 PayPal Team Fee

(This works out to $456.95 per player)

Check or Cash Team Discount:

10% discount if the entire team pays in FULL by OCTOBER 9th with ONE Check (or Cash) for the MINIMUM 15 PLAYER ROSTER

Check/Cash discount Team Fee: $7,410 - $741 = $6,669.00 Check/Cash Team Fee

(This works out to $444.60 per player)

SEE YOU ON THE ICE!

McD

Response:

I want in

BY: LiamFM
Sep 12th, 2010 @ 4:00PM


Yo Doc - I want in. Any teams looking for a guy on D?

Holla at me! Let me know how to sign up and get on a team.
Response:

Yep

BY: hkydoc
Sep 14th, 2010 @ 2:49PM


There is some room, Liam. E-mail me at my regular e-mail address or through the UVHL website.

Doc
Response:

YAAAAH!

BY: hkydoc
Sep 9th, 2010 @ 9:29PM


I can't fucking wait to get back on the ice!

McD
Response:

Brew Crew!

BY: kpark
Sep 22nd, 2010 @ 1:40PM


I wish I could say that I've been working out all summer in preparation for the season....it's gonna be ugly. Regardless, I can't wait.

It'll be interesting to see the revamped Brew Crew. Rumor has it they've brought in some youth.

KP
Response:

Predictions for 2010/2011?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 22nd, 2010 @ 3:10PM


Where to start...well, I can certainly say that the team with the biggest bullseye on their backs will be the defending champs, The Brewers. Although losing their best player(s) to meandering, drunkenness and one-night stands with lonely nurses and med students across North America, the Brew Crew will no doubt be back ready to go by game night. Led by their aging (yet full of fire) superstar...Al \"The Senior Situation\" Sorrentino, defensive stallwart Dan \"Eyes off my Ben and Jerry\'s\" Charette, and the ever-tenacious Garren \"Dr.Hook\" Poirrier, they should along with a talented group of youngsters compete with the best of \'em any given Tuesday. Tuck is a mystery to me, as I haven\'t heard anything, but they always have their \"Ducks in a row\" come gametime. The Dead River Rats outta be a crapshoot. Not knowing whether or not Greg \"W.A.G.H.I.P\" Hadley will be between the pipes, makes it tough to tell what their lineup will be. If Hads can put a decent crew in front of him, they still need more balance and a consistent group of guys to be competitive. The Gamblers led by the big line if Meyer Marazzo and Ammel, will no doubt be tough to stop once again. Even if they only had one line, they\'d still compete...at least for a while. Especially with a once-proven goalie than stand on his head when needed. As long as he stays healthy...he can carry them back to the finals. The Whale may not have been the most triumphant team in UVHL history, but they consistently bring hard-work and speed and a ton of heart every game they lace \'em up. Kenny \"LaLaLaLaLaLaLaLa\" Lallier has a decent group of character guys, that work hard to win every time out. Hopefully they can gel together a couple decent lines, and figure out how to win. Their Defense has been pretty solid, and need to support Kenny in order to pull out a W. The Nords bring a new look going into the upcoming season. Unfortunately losing a couple key pieces of the puzzle in Mike O\'Neil and Dave \"The Playoff Beard\" Willis, they have added some new blood to the mix. Returning for another hopeful season are their key elements of Turner between the pipes, Park, Tommy \"The minister of Defense\" Dakai, and McD stabilizing the the defensive end, the offense usually gets spread around pretty well. A few names on the roster still not confirmed, put my Nords prediction a little short, but I know our guys will be ready to bring it come gamenight. Good luck to all, \"Keep your head up, and yer stick on the ice\"
Response:

Prediction

BY: MASSHOLE
Sep 23rd, 2010 @ 10:02AM


1. I will make JT look like Swiss cheese.

2. McD will be a burnt buffalo wing in the corner when I get done with him.

3. The queen bitch himself Kelly - I will torment every opportunity and make him look like a cone on the ice. In the end he will yell and his tampon will drop out on the ice.

Your Friend,
Masshole
Hands of stone, speed of a sloth
Response:

Nords!

BY: kpark
Oct 6th, 2010 @ 9:33AM


One prediction...that's all I need.

Charette will have cookie dough ice cream stored inside his helmet just in case he gets hungry.

Oh, and another one, Poirier will take at least 3 penalties.

Oh, one more, Al Sorrentino will still be called "The Fonz"

Nords win....4-3.
Response:

Very nice Marshy

BY: vtdownhiller
Sep 23rd, 2010 @ 6:36PM


The Brew Crew are poised. Replacing our fallen comrades will not be easy, but we do welcome new brothers to our fold. Good Luck to all and to all a good night
Response:

McD is out of commish

BY: hkydoc
Sep 30th, 2010 @ 9:51PM


Fellow UVHLers:

I hate to say it but I will be on the sidelines this season. Please do not give Kelly too much shit as I recover from surgery to remove a kidney tumor on Tuesday Oct. 5th at DHMC. I am looking forward to the surgery, and to feeling better, but my return is unforseeable at this point.

As I look back on the past 7 seasons, starting the UVHL from scratch with JT (and then adding Kelly along the way), I feel that the league is one of my most proud accomplishments in my life. I want all of you to know that we couldn\'t have done it without you, the players, because you made our hockey dreams come true once we realized that we weren\'t going to play in the NHL.

Your prayers, thoughts, and incesssant ball busting are always appreciated! Have a great season, Guys.

Sincerely,

Shawn McDermott

P.S. If I kick the bucket you had better name a fuckin\' trophy after me!
Response:

BY: ghadley
Oct 1st, 2010 @ 1:23PM


Best of luck mcburger, our prayers are of course with you. See ya on the sidelines............
Response:

I got it!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 1st, 2010 @ 2:16PM


It'll obviously be the honorary McDermott Wing Trough...
But no need, you'll be back in the swing of things before you know it!
See you in recovery pal!
Response:

Memorial New Wing Flavor?

BY: rgrunds
Oct 2nd, 2010 @ 6:20AM


Hope everything goes well and this becomes just a matter of recovering from the surgery. I have heard they can do a lot of kidney procedures laproscopically which reduces the breadth of tissue damage.

And No, despite your secret desires, they can't approach it through your asshole.

Again, I hope this is just an inconvenience and you are back in no time leaving your side of the net.....open.
Response:

Memorial New Wing Flavor?

BY: rgrunds
Oct 2nd, 2010 @ 6:20AM


Hope everything goes well and this becomes just a matter of recovering from the surgery. I have heard they can do a lot of kidney procedures laproscopically which reduces the breadth of tissue damage.

And No, despite your secret desires, they can't approach it through your asshole.

Again, I hope this is just an inconvenience and you are back in no time leaving your side of the net.....open.
Response:

News from McDiesel Camp....

BY: kpark
Oct 6th, 2010 @ 9:23AM


Hey guys, the news from McDermott's People is that the surgery was a success. Things got a little more complicated than they were hoping, but he is now on the road to recovery.

All cash donations can be sent to the "Let Shawn Eat Wings Again Fund"

McDefense, you will definitely be missed this season! Mend quickly, because the Nord's defense isn't the same without you.

KP
Response:

Life in the beer league!

BY: kpark
Oct 6th, 2010 @ 1:35PM


This is too funny...yet so true!


Response:

BY: Grambo
Oct 11th, 2010 @ 3:38PM


Haha. Stellar.
Response:

Prediction

BY: MASSHOLE
Oct 11th, 2010 @ 2:35PM


Brewers 5 NorDinks 3

Opening up the season by knockin down bitches and Ho's will be nice. Oh by the way Kelly I have a pint of ass whipping for the game.

Masshole
Response:

Gameday

BY: McG
Oct 12th, 2010 @ 11:19AM



Response:

HA HA!

BY: kpark
Oct 12th, 2010 @ 11:54AM


Love it. That's what I'm going to do to my wife tonight when I get home from hockey!
Response:

Good game

BY: vtdownhiller
Oct 14th, 2010 @ 5:26PM


The new "dinks" looked good. Great transition game, you won the neutral zone and as usual JT was stellar in net, and got his pipes to help him out. We looked rusty and lost all the loose puck battles and were muscled around but show good signs with some great guys for additions, in the locker room and out. We took a beating and deserved it. .500 regular season = Whalen cup.
Response:

Hadley!

BY: hkydoc
Oct 18th, 2010 @ 7:03PM


2 assists, Buddy? Way to go, eh! It is so good to know you're skating out there.

McD
Response:

Good start, Fellas.

BY: hkydoc
Oct 18th, 2010 @ 7:10PM


Sounds like this was a good game for early in the season as both squads find their 2010-11 identities and chemistry. Nothing is wrong with a 1 goal UVHL game ever.

McD
Response:

You guys are gonna make me cry...

BY: hkydoc
Oct 18th, 2010 @ 7:20PM


Thanks for the dedication, Boys! That means a lot. Hopefully I'll be ready by mid-season. GO NORDS!

Did you know that MMR stands for measles-mumps-rubella? They are officially the VIRAL LINE, or the DEADLY VIRUS, or maybe just INFECTION...

Funny line about Crowson in San Fran, Parky! Did you really get to second gear?

McD
Response:

Should book a plane ticket...

BY: JTStally
Oct 18th, 2010 @ 10:56PM


...Just to dangle Parky and knock the blue cheese out of McDiesel...Go Whale! Have fun boys!
Response:

Park vs. Liam "Avery" Oliver

BY: Z-Skate
Oct 19th, 2010 @ 12:03PM


Yes, the Whale have an uphill battle much like Mr. Park and his blood pressure when he sees Oliver step on the ice tonight. It will be interesting to see how this one gets called as the refs will be impartial !!

Yes, I said it .. Liam gets a bum rap.

Park, how's the BP?
Response:

Park vs. Liam "Avery" Oliver

BY: McG
Oct 19th, 2010 @ 1:38PM



Response:

HA HA HA!

BY: kpark
Oct 21st, 2010 @ 7:45AM


Love it McG! LOVE IT!
Response:

ZZZZZZZ

BY: kpark
Oct 21st, 2010 @ 8:02AM


Z! You are a tool. BP is rising! Did you get your panties out of a wad after bitching & whining about our defense stepping up....LEGALLY...on your little boy toy?
Response:

Gameday

BY: McG
Oct 26th, 2010 @ 8:02AM


\"\"
Response:

Ha Ha Ha!

BY: kpark
Oct 26th, 2010 @ 1:37PM


McG.....McBrilliant.
Response:

Hmmmm

BY: kpark
Oct 26th, 2010 @ 1:45PM


Any thoughts on this one? Looks like the league is picking the Tuckies to win this one 57% to 43%.

I'm going with the Nords. I'm also going to say that I'll turn McGovern inside out!

Some other predictions:

- Jordy McGee will have a Hat trick on Yacey.
- Marshy will make a rink wide pass that will hit the boards 3 feet in the air.
- Batesy will turn me inside out at least once.
- Bates & Hay will still look like long lost twins after the game
- Nowak won't play...suspended...but it's still my prediction.
- Puchilak will take 2 penalties

This should be a great game...any which way it goes down. There will be a professional photographer & scouts in the audience, so look your best.

Response:

Ugly Hockey?

BY: kpark
Oct 26th, 2010 @ 1:45PM


Will this be some ugly hockey or what? I have no idea what these two teams will bring to the table tonight.
Response:

All Gamblers...eh?

BY: kpark
Oct 26th, 2010 @ 1:46PM


100% of the votes are that the G-Men will win this one huh?
Response:

Shorthanded

BY: Garrentee
Oct 26th, 2010 @ 3:07PM


Again we are shorthanded tonight but with the fonzies return its like having 3 extra guys out there!
Response:

If you need a body!

BY: kpark
Oct 26th, 2010 @ 3:27PM


I'll be at the rink anyways. That is IF you want me, and IF the Whalers will accept a sub.

KP
Response:

Total ass-whooping

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 27th, 2010 @ 1:29PM


Outskated, outplayed and overall a bad game for the Nords. Maybe the best part was the cherry-picking when it was 9-2...nice job Tuckies! The re-match outta be a different game for sure!
Response:

Back to earth, Nords.

BY: hkydoc
Oct 27th, 2010 @ 9:06PM


Uh oh... Looks like we got a taste of our own medicine courtesy of the Tuckies, eh.

McD
Response:

What happened?

BY: hkydoc
Oct 28th, 2010 @ 7:32AM


De-fense! De-fense! Was there ANY defense?

McD
Response:

Tight game, eh?

BY: hkydoc
Oct 28th, 2010 @ 7:33AM


No details yet, but if it went to a shootout it must have been a good one! Get off your ass, Park!

McD
Response:

Total

BY: habman
Nov 8th, 2010 @ 4:13PM


Wonder which game tomorrow night has a chance of beating this years leading 14 goal total? Does anyone know what the highest 1 game goal total in UVHL history is?
Response:

Great Question!

BY: kpark
Nov 8th, 2010 @ 6:19PM


Took me a couple minutes to pull the data but!

Highest scoring ONE GOAL GAME: Gamblers 10, Whalers 9
http://www.uvhl.com/event-356.php (10-9)

Highest Scoring Game: 21 goals, 3 times
http://www.uvhl.com/event-146.php
http://www.uvhl.com/event-238.php
http://www.uvhl.com/event-214.php

Largest Margin of Victory:
http://www.uvhl.com/event-214.php (13 Goals)
http://www.uvhl.com/event-684.php (12 Goals, LAST WEEK)

Largest Shutout Victory:
http://www.uvhl.com/event-684.php (LAST WEEK)

Some pretty cool stats!
Response:

BY: habman
Nov 11th, 2010 @ 7:43PM


Nice to see somewhat "normal" scores this week.
Response:

Make your picks!

BY: kpark
Nov 8th, 2010 @ 6:50PM


I can't wait for this game! Even though the Nords haven't come out on top in a couple of years, this is always a high intensity, fast paced and clean game. It's the best that the UVie has to offer!

Don't forget to make your game picks! I'm putting up $100 Gift Card at the end of the year to the player who makes the most correct picks...or percentage. I haven't really figured out the details yet.

KP
Response:

Anti Socials??

BY: Grambo
Nov 9th, 2010 @ 6:40AM


I was just wondering if anyone else was going to join us Whalers at the bar one night? We saw Dead River there once, but i thought there were 6 teams in this league!!
Response:

Anti-Socials?

BY: kpark
Nov 9th, 2010 @ 8:09AM


Hey Grambo...maybe it's you! Someone told me that they would go if you stop showing up.

KP
Response:

Winless

BY: Z-Skate
Nov 9th, 2010 @ 11:23AM


Maybe we should try to win a game before we start throwing shit on the wall about other teams ...
Response:

Pavel Datsyuk Plays Keep Away

BY: kpark
Nov 9th, 2010 @ 8:13AM


This is sick! I kind of think that Pavel got some of these moves from me.


Response:

one teensy weensy remark

BY: rgrunds
Nov 10th, 2010 @ 11:26AM


and it gets deleted.


I didn\'t do anything wrong. Not one little thing.

I was just trying to help with exposure on Facebook...
Response:

REALLY?

BY: kpark
Nov 11th, 2010 @ 7:01PM


You really didn't think you did anything wrong?

Look behind you, that's the line you crossed about half a mile back.
Response:

That is so unfair

BY: rgrunds
Nov 12th, 2010 @ 12:04PM


I just want all the people of the world and the children to join hands and rejoice in hockey and outrageous statements....be they White....be they Black....be they Colored....
Response:

Were these players armed ??!!??

BY: Kojak
Nov 11th, 2010 @ 4:49PM


Jesus Christ, JOHNSON. You attend one friggin' ref school and now you're a Gestapo agent. What did you do, swallow your whistle from being out of breathe. It sucks that refs can't go to the bench, EH !?! Looking at the box score, it seems every time you wheezed you blew your freakin' harmonica. Did you simply call a penalty each time so you could justify the game interruption ??? Let'em PLAY for Christ's sake !! I canNOT wait to work with YOU as a partner.
Response:

goalie needed tonight/Brattleboro

BY: rgrunds
Nov 15th, 2010 @ 11:20AM


Men\'s A skate.

9:15 in Brattleboro.

Contact Damon Kindopp

603-256-6990
Response:

Brattleboro Goalie spot filled

BY: rgrunds
Nov 15th, 2010 @ 2:53PM


Fuggedaboudit
Response:

talking shit

BY: SK8VT
Nov 16th, 2010 @ 11:43AM


Rumor has it Brian Smith's talking lot of smack saying he's netting a hatty in the first on JT and that the Brewers are going to Thump the Nords...
Response:

Smack?!?!

BY: kpark
Nov 16th, 2010 @ 2:03PM


I think Brian Smith is shooting alot of Smack into his veins!

I'm going to go out on a limb and say that I WILL NOT SCORE A GOAL IN ANY PERIOD TONIGHT! BAM!

This should be a good game. Crowson has been on fire, Turner has looked moderately better.

Time will tell.
Response:

Federal Hockey League Exhibition Game/ Nov 22 Morrisville

BY: rgrunds
Nov 21st, 2010 @ 5:33PM


New pro league looking to expand into Vermont is having an exhibition game in Morrisville, tomorrow. I think there is an investor who has already committed to a Vermont franchise, but I\'m not sure.

The league is designed to feed the ECHL and has a couple players skating in anticipation of returning to the AHL or NHL.

Phil DiFranco is the League Commissioner and said after the game, the team owners of the participating clubs will talk to those who want to try out.

Phil\'s number is 321-725-7181.
Response:

7:05/Green Mountain Arena, Morrisville

BY: rgrunds
Nov 21st, 2010 @ 5:36PM


Broome County Barons v Thousand Island Privateers.


Monday (tomorrow) November 22

Look on the Federal Hockey League Website for standings/players/statistics.
Response:

$5 Skate tonight @ Woodstock Union Arena

BY: kpark
Nov 22nd, 2010 @ 10:02AM


Hey guys, the VT Law team has an hour and a half time slot from 9pm - 10:30pm and is looking for a goalie and about 7-10 skaters. Due to the holiday, they are going to be missing some players.

It\'s basically an intersquad scrimmage, $5.

If you are interested, please email Allison Stone at: alison.milbury.stone@gmail.com

Thanks,

Kelly
Response:

VT Law School skate

BY: Z-Skate
Nov 23rd, 2010 @ 8:00AM


Park b/c you were a pussy last night "bad back" .. You are going to get run over probably by Liam. The Whale get there first win 6-4.
Response:

Weak "back"

BY: habman
Nov 23rd, 2010 @ 11:14AM


Park,

I'm pretty disappointed in your no show last night. I think with the quality practice you missed and that Jay got... it might not be such a cake walk after. Watch out for a better Whale breakout.
Response:

Big Talk!

BY: kpark
Nov 23rd, 2010 @ 2:03PM


Coatesy, are you rooting for the Whale? Yes, my back was sore yesterday, mostly because I'm fat and out of shape. So in order to try and keep this one close, I figured I would conserve my energy and not skate last night.

How was the VT Law skate?
Response:

Go WHALE!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 29th, 2010 @ 7:13AM


C'Mon guys....Zanleoni can't score 'em all, and Kenny can't keep 'em out without some help from your D...Get the W...make us proud
Response:

Body Count?

BY: kpark
Nov 30th, 2010 @ 9:24AM


Hey Tuckies, how many skaters are you going to have tonight?

KP
Response:

Gamblers win by a factor of 4.....

BY: rgrunds
Dec 1st, 2010 @ 8:07PM


Feiden flees team....
Response:

Dan Charette POA

BY: rgrunds
Dec 6th, 2010 @ 1:29PM


Couldn\'t have done it without him.
Response:

HUH?

BY: kpark
Dec 6th, 2010 @ 1:48PM


What does that mean? You think Charette is a Piece Of Ass?
Response:

He's listed as the goalie

BY: rgrunds
Dec 6th, 2010 @ 2:11PM


Did he fill in?

The box score has him as the goalie.
Response:

BY: McG
Dec 6th, 2010 @ 2:48PM


He didn't. But even if he did, he'd have been on the losing side of an 8-4 tilt. Make some sense, Grundle.
Response:

You're just all against me

BY: rgrunds
Dec 11th, 2010 @ 4:47PM


That's the way you people are.

I only say nice things and in response, I get bitter irony and sarcasm.
Response:

Charette POW

BY: rgrunds
Dec 6th, 2010 @ 2:32PM


yeah.
Response:

Charette POW

BY: rgrunds
Dec 6th, 2010 @ 2:32PM


yeah.
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Dec 7th, 2010 @ 6:41AM


haha wow tell us what you really think Kelly
Response:

Gameday a derpa herr durr derp

BY: McG
Dec 7th, 2010 @ 12:12PM


\"sarahpalin2\"
Response:

Love it!

BY: kpark
Dec 7th, 2010 @ 1:36PM


McG, is that your mom?
Response:

Was LaPerle Really the Goalie?

BY: rgrunds
Dec 13th, 2010 @ 3:00PM


Or was Lallier just using someone else\'s name?


Response:

schade

BY: rgrunds
Dec 13th, 2010 @ 9:52PM


zehr schade.

Lallier lag in toten eis banden.........
Response:

Gameday

BY: McG
Dec 14th, 2010 @ 7:36AM


\"\"
Response:

Best line of the years

BY: rgrunds
Dec 18th, 2010 @ 10:58AM


...scored on a Feiden turnover behind his own net as he tried firing the puck behind his own net, only to see his best efforts go 4 feet


Response:

year

BY: rgrunds
Dec 18th, 2010 @ 11:01AM


make that year.


Response:

Thanks Grundo

BY: kpark
Dec 21st, 2010 @ 8:56AM


Thanks, it was a pretty awful play!
Response:

Free Ice Tonight!

BY: kpark
Dec 21st, 2010 @ 8:59AM


Hey guys, we are looking for some extra bodies to fill out the Tuck Roster. Due to Winter Break, they only have one guy on their team tonight, I\'ve got 7 others joining in, but we want at least 10. It\'s a full game (3 - 15 minute periods) with 2 refs and a scorekeeper.

Roster So Far:

Jeremy Seidling (B League Superstar Goaltender)

1. Ryan McGovern
2. Kelly Park
3. Jay Zanleoni
4. Bruce Hathorn
5. Bobby Rosati
6. Ricky Golden
7. Justin Barwood

Possibly my little brother if he makes the trip up from Boston, so we need 2 more.

Let me know if you\'re interested.
Response:

nevermind

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 21st, 2010 @ 12:34PM


not in...thx anyway. Thought it might be the late game, and jumped the gun...
Response:

1

BY: McG
Dec 21st, 2010 @ 12:49PM


Yehle said he'd skate as well.
Response:

6-2 and 7-3 ..

BY: Z-Skate
Jan 4th, 2011 @ 2:26PM


I did see JT schooling some toddlers in Norwich over the break but we are good for atleast 5 on JT .. The whale will look to keep it under 6 goals to help out Kenny's GAA. The Whale 5-3
Response:

Scores? WTF?

BY: hkydoc
Jan 5th, 2011 @ 11:39AM


Hey, Parky! I don\'t take over until NEXT week, eh. How about the scores from last night for fuck\'s sake?

The Commish & player formerly knows as \"McDefense\"
Response:

McDIESEL!

BY: kpark
Jan 5th, 2011 @ 11:52AM


Hey buddy, about time you chimmed back into the UVHL Forum. You have been sorely missed. Yes, you take over the league on 1/11/2011. That'll be a great day.

SCORES? I just got home at midnight last night after hockey and have been working all day, chill out.

Scores will be up tonight, but if you can't wait:

Nordiques 8, Whalers 3
Tuck 4, Dead River 3 (SO)
Gamblers 4, Brew Crew 2
Response:

Yaaaah!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 5th, 2011 @ 3:41PM


Thanks, eh! I've missed Tuesday nights and can't wait to be back! Hopefully I'll be on the Nords bench ready to play sometime in February.

McD
Response:

Feiden not Turner too?

BY: rgrunds
Jan 6th, 2011 @ 9:22AM


It was a tie. Be fair. Think of Turner\'s feelings. He\'s not a stable person, plus, he would have had lots of delicious beer.

I like beer.

If you get beer JT, I voted for you.

I demand a change in status for JT.
Response:

Both

BY: kpark
Jan 7th, 2011 @ 12:23PM


It's automated, so it pulls in the first one. They both win, or should I flip a coin?

KP
Response:

F*CK TUCK!

BY: kpark
Jan 11th, 2011 @ 10:08AM


Big game tonight. I don't think McDermott is going to get the Pre-Game writeups done, so here's my go.

Tuck has had it's way with the Nords in a 10-2 & 5-4 wins this season. The odds makers in Vegas have the Tuckies winning 6-4...I'm making my own odds though, Nords win 5-3.

KP
Response:

Fack Tuck? No, FACK YOU

BY: McG
Jan 11th, 2011 @ 11:01AM



Response:

BRILLIANT!

BY: kpark
Jan 11th, 2011 @ 11:34AM


I love it McG, F'in Brilliant. I'm still gonna bring the pain tonight...so be prepared!

KP
Response:

5 goals huh?

BY: kpark
Jan 11th, 2011 @ 11:35AM


OUCH! Any response from the Dead River Rats?
Response:

Welcome Back McDermott!

BY: kpark
Jan 11th, 2011 @ 3:26PM


I just wanted to say Welcome Back to my Co-Commissioner, Dr. Shawn \"McLovin\" McDermott. After a 3.5 month hiatus to heal his body and then consume as much blue cheese as possible, Shawn will take over commissioner duties for the 2nd half of the year and hopefully be back in playing shape sometime in February.

You were sorely missed my friend.

KP
Response:

Hope you're O.K.

BY: rgrunds
Jan 14th, 2011 @ 3:16PM


recover.
Response:

YAAAAAAAHH!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 16th, 2011 @ 4:16PM


Thanks, Parky! The doc said my bleu cheese content was WAY down after the surgery, expecially considering that the kidney tumor was 25% blue cheese iteslf!

It is great to be back, and I have a lot of people, and God, to thank for it - especially my parents, my wonderful ex Alanna, my amazing surgeon John Seigne, the fantastic nurses at DHMC, and everyone who was praying and pulling for me!

See you on the ice!

McD
Response:

Great Game

BY: kpark
Jan 11th, 2011 @ 10:27PM


Other than the dismal shootout, this was a hell of a game! Both teams went through their entire rosters, maybe the goalies are just that good.
Response:

Robbed

BY: stevekenning
Jan 14th, 2011 @ 8:42AM


Kid gets his second goal taken away, and doesnt even crack the three stars.

Not since figure skating has there been this kind of scandal.
Response:

Pre-game reports

BY: hkydoc
Jan 17th, 2011 @ 5:12PM


I\'ll be posting them on game day, not before. I\'m not sure what Kelly\'s routine was, but I\'d prefer you read the write-ups from the week before through Monday rather than start on the pre-games prior to game day.

See you on the ice!

McD
Response:

Game ON tonight!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 18th, 2011 @ 9:24AM


All games are ON tonight despite the weather predictions. We can\'t reschedule a UVHL game, so they must be played. Use your best judgement tonight and drive safe. Regardless of attendance there will be fun on the ice, and post-game beer at Bentley\'s, eh!

See you on the ice!

McD
Response:

Special Punishment

BY: rgrunds
Jan 23rd, 2011 @ 8:21AM


Except for Feiden, who is a goalie, All players from both teams should be sent to secret camps in the Gobi Desert and worked to death.
Response:

Nords/DR special sanction

BY: rgrunds
Jan 23rd, 2011 @ 8:23AM


Except for Feiden, who is a goalie, All players from both teams should be sent to secret camps in the Gobi Desert and worked to death.
Response:

WOW

BY: kpark
Jan 23rd, 2011 @ 8:36AM


WEAK! I can't believe non of the Nordiques stuck around. WEAK! Ice time they paid for, were already at the rink. Makes my blood boil

KP
Response:

It used to be funnier here

BY: rgrunds
Jan 24th, 2011 @ 5:55AM


People should make more outrageous remarks and personal attacks. This place used to be really fun. Theraputic, even.

Maybe everyone was just worried about McDermott\'s kidney. Guys, it wasn\'t his kidney...it had more to do with retrieving seven...um....\"prosthetic\" devices and their batteries.


Response:

Here's some funny

BY: McG
Jan 24th, 2011 @ 11:19AM


Professor Grundy Grunderson III, Esq. - Career Statistics:


















CATEGORY STATISTIC
Forum posts251
UVHL games played1
UVHL record0 - 1 - 0
GAA7.00

Response:

HARSH!

BY: kpark
Jan 24th, 2011 @ 12:06PM


McG, you are getting angry with your old age!
Response:

No Problem

BY: rgrunds
Jan 24th, 2011 @ 12:16PM


That's O.K. I'm dying to fill in one night. No problem. McD knows a Hebrew or two that can stop the puck.

By the way, McD was much more pleasant when he had all that hardware in his buns.

Have a speedy recovery.
Response:

My Mistake...that should be McGovern..not McDermott

BY: rgrunds
Jan 24th, 2011 @ 12:19PM


All Celtics look alike...big problem.

Sorry Shawn, didn't mean to be unfair. Especially when you have a formidable party (choke..gag..) in your defense.

Maybe McG has lost his inflatable companions....
Response:

Hey!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 27th, 2011 @ 7:49PM


Grundy, how did you get a hold of my medical records? There were seven "items" removed from my innards, a 1972 Canadian penny, and approximately 1.8 kg of condensed Blue Cheese...

McD
Response:

It's a Jewish Trick

BY: rgrunds
Jan 28th, 2011 @ 11:34AM


That's the way we are. We can get medical records by using our contacts in the International Conspiracy to Control World Finance and Violate Gentile Women.

Just so you know.....
Response:

Big Game!

BY: kpark
Jan 24th, 2011 @ 12:22PM


This SUCKS. I may have to miss this game due to a conference call with the west coast. I'm going to do my best to get there.

KP
Response:

Yeah It does

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 24th, 2011 @ 3:57PM


Park, we need you...in order to fulfill the prophecy of us gang-raping the 'Blers...you need to bring your man-menacing toughness to the bluline. LOL.
We haven't beat these clowns in....FOREVER. Every time we play them, we come out awesome, get up a goal or so, and fall apart with penalties, excessive WHINING from the 'Blers, and overall breakdown from our whole team. I want this win more than any other game this year so far, and if we have to do it without our STAR defenceman...so be it! Nords 5 'Blers 2...DO IT...DO IT
Response:

Worst Ref?

BY: kpark
Jan 24th, 2011 @ 12:39PM


New Poll, \"Who is the Worst Ref in the UVHL?\"

CJ, Park, Hadley, McGee, Gattie, Seidling.

Vote honestly! Some refs think they are better than they are...this should get interesting!
Response:

Bring your foam fingers

BY: stevekenning
Jan 24th, 2011 @ 3:59PM


Expect a big Tuck fan base on Tuesday night.
Response:

Use your cell phone

BY: jt
Jan 24th, 2011 @ 4:11PM


Kelly,
The best course of action is to 1) drive to the rink (fully dressed and in skate guards). 2) Have your conference call. 3) Jump on the ice a few minutes into the first.

JT
Response:

Yah!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 25th, 2011 @ 9:48AM


Woo hoo! I hope there will be drinking and boobies in the stands!
Response:

Ya, that is a really good plan!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 25th, 2011 @ 9:52AM


JT has it all figured out! You fuckers had better show up tonight. I had no choice but to lambaste you in the pre-game after last week's pathetic display of so called love of the game. Dig deep, Boys.
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Jan 25th, 2011 @ 10:28AM


wow tell us how you really feel mcubuffalo, dead river had 3 friggen guys, we had no refs, would of been fun for about 5 min. Seely said hes gonna down you tonight JT, hes talking a lot of shit about you and also said we would probably have more of a fighting chance without Mrs. Park anyway tonight
Response:

Insulted!

BY: kpark
Jan 25th, 2011 @ 10:57AM


Hey Sk8r Boi...yes, your forum name is gay. I'm not sure if it was you or Seely insulting me, but I'm going to make sure to hurt him and hit you in the back with a blistering slapshot.

KP
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Jan 25th, 2011 @ 11:03AM


win or lose im gonna break your other knee tonight
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Jan 25th, 2011 @ 11:18AM


One more thing, wheres the Heart Park? Our star defensemen taking a phone call over the big game tonight...makes my blood boil
Response:

WTF?

BY: hkydoc
Jan 25th, 2011 @ 2:35PM


Park, JT, and myself would have suited up if we were there (and I was ready to play again) for a fun scrimmage! I'm just bustin' your balls, deservedly, but you guys get the point, don't you?
Response:

WTF?

BY: hkydoc
Jan 25th, 2011 @ 9:53AM


Are you fuckers ever gonna write anything in here? Show us you're interested for fuck's sake!
Response:

Olli Jokinen is excited for gameday

BY: McG
Jan 25th, 2011 @ 1:11PM


REALLY excited

(safe for work -- need sound)
Response:

Wow...

BY: hkydoc
Jan 25th, 2011 @ 2:52PM


I'm speechless... Well, almost! McG - is this the new locker room song for the Tuckies tonight? If not, I think the Nords will claim it as their own as it is completely devoid of heart and soul. I listened to the whole thing and then downloaded it for my iPod...
Response:

You sad person

BY: rgrunds
Jan 26th, 2011 @ 6:23AM


That could only be appreciated by a diminished and diseased mind. Or maybe just a five year old on benzedrine.

I have a feeling you have been living on bacon and pop tarts for the past 23 years.

Would you like one of the commissioners to call your parents and intervene?
Response:

Feiden's Workout!

BY: kpark
Jan 27th, 2011 @ 7:07AM


I just found this awesome video of Dead River\'s Greg Feiden at the Gym. It all makes sense now!


Response:

No rope?

BY: 1stPeriod
Jan 27th, 2011 @ 8:29AM


Park, you must be mistaken, I jump rope while using my shake weight.

Also, was that McG pumping iron in the first scene?
Response:

Feiden

BY: kpark
Jan 27th, 2011 @ 9:58AM


I had no idea you were such a fitness nut. McGovern looks pissed in this video, I think he's just jealous of your physique. You REALY look like you are enjoying shakin'

KP
Response:

Seriousness

BY: 1stPeriod
Jan 27th, 2011 @ 4:32PM


You can never be too serious about training for the UVHL, I mean, it's not like everyone gets into the playoffs, and when you can shake your way to excellence, you can't help but enjoy yourself.
Response:

Player profile pics

BY: hkydoc
Jan 27th, 2011 @ 7:43PM


I\'d love to see more UVHLers with photos in their player profiles. The Three Stars always look better with pics next to the nominee, and the profiles are always more personal with one as well. UVHL Forum profile pics are good, too. The funnier the better!!! So, please take a minute and update your player profile with a pic, eh.

See you on the ice!

McD
Response:

Photos?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 28th, 2011 @ 2:27PM


Why is it every time I try to upload a photo, it says \"Fatal Error\"? Waddup wit \'dat Parky?
Response:

Ok

BY: hkydoc
Jan 29th, 2011 @ 3:49PM


I'll let Parky know. Thanks, eh!
Response:

I apologize

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 28th, 2011 @ 2:36PM


To my Nordique teammates, I apologize for my pre-game prediction of gang-raping and destroying the Gamblers. Although there are select few of them I would STILL love to put through the boards, I should not have put that kind of pressure on our team, especially with such a short bench. For myself at least, I enjoy the competitiveness every time we play them, and every game is really close, seemingly til the last 4-5 minutes. Great game by Condon, and JT deserves a shout out, for stopping a LOT of quality chances by the G-men. So, for my blasphemous comments, I feel shame...And hopefully when it really counts, the Nords will have a sweet victory..See you boys (and Smurfette) for the rematch at Campion...which I will NOT predict the outcome..
Response:

Hey!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 29th, 2011 @ 3:51PM


There is nothing wrong with making a bold prediction! Honestly, I wish we saw more traffic on the website with stuff like that. It can make you show up for a game cuz you gotta try to back it up. You did get the first assist on the Nords' only goal, Marshy. So, I say keep it up!

McD
Response:

Evan Seely wins Jan 18th POW

BY: hkydoc
Jan 29th, 2011 @ 3:48PM


The Gamblers\' Evan Seely won 52% of the vote to win the UVHL\'s Player of the Week for January 18th for his 1 goal, 2 assist performance leading his team in a -3 win over the Whalers. Tuck\'s Steve Kenning was second in voting with 27% of the votes for his 41:10 minutes of shutout hockey against the Brewers in a 5-1 win.

Is Seely even old enough to claim his prize at Long Trail? Enjoy the beer, boys, and see you on the ice!

McD
Response:

Jason Yehle wins Jan 11th POW

BY: hkydoc
Jan 29th, 2011 @ 3:59PM


In a tight race, Brewers defenceman Jason Yehle won the UVHL\'s Player of the Week for January 11th for his 3 assists in a comeback win over the Whalers 6-3 to lead all Brewers scorers.
Response:

More website participation please!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 29th, 2011 @ 4:19PM


We\'d love to see more of you post comments, make bold game predictions, bust each other\'s balls, post Forum comments and topics, and post player photos on the website. We work hard every week to make this fun, and we get rewarded when we see you players taking part in the very best adult league hockey website there is!

Please let us know you are reading the game write-ups, pre-game reports, and Forum by taking part in the fun! Take a minute and post a pic to your player profile - the funnier the better!

See you on the ice!

McD
Response:

Grundy, too.

BY: hkydoc
Jan 29th, 2011 @ 4:22PM


Yes, Bob, this means you, too, you sick fuck. I have even added you to the Nords roster so we can have you post a pic and add to your extensive player profile and UVHL career stats!

McD
Response:

Ow That's So Unfair

BY: rgrunds
Jan 29th, 2011 @ 7:09PM


I am normal...

I just want to play hockey and help all peoples, be they black, be they white...be they colored.

Just let me know when you need a fill-in. No problem. Good goaltenders this year and last. I've become even more marginalized.
Response:

Is J Chern the most underrated player in the UVHL?

BY: noble123
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 7:22AM


Practically carries his team to victory (1 goal in regulation and closes it in the shootout) vs the Whalers and only gets 2% of the votes for POW??? I smell a conspiracy
Response:

definitely

BY: boardhopper
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 7:26AM


underrated is an understatement! and the 6-inch goal celebration leaps are youtube worthy. Somebody get on that STAT!!
Response:

dont forget...

BY: noble123
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 7:30AM


about how he combos that with the down to one knee fist pump...the whole combo is just incredible. I smell a youtube sensation
Response:

BY: boardhopper
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 7:31AM


you smell alot of things noble. but i do agree, he is a star in the making--he plays with such an anger out there. I would NOT want to break that guy's futon.
Response:

BY: SquatnPuke
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 7:36AM


I think you're all fools. Underrated? Any hockey fan this side of the Mississippi know this guy owns the NCAA record for gpm (goals per minute). Underrated? don't think so. Underappreciated? Definitely.
Response:

BY: knuckle puck
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 7:38AM


You have to be kidding me. Cherney's first goal was a fluke, he stumbled and on his way to the ice the puck grazed off his stick... and the shoot out goal? well I guess a broken clock can be right twice a day...
Response:

BY: boardhopper
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 7:43AM


dude i highly doubt you were amongst the 35 fans in attendance. stop hating, kid deserved POTW.
Response:

BY: noble123
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 7:54AM


lets not forget the kid has done it before as squatnpuck alluded to before. I am not sure how many of you were in the stands when J Chern played Castleton State, but I was and the performance he put on was magical. For those of you who dont know what i am talking about check out the game summary. And knuckle puck why don't you quit moping around, rumor has it you blew it the shootout for the whalers

http://www3.amherst.edu/~sports/2003_2004/m-hockey/0123_castletonstate.html
Response:

BY: boardhopper
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 7:57AM


stone cold fox.
Response:

BY: witnessof25year
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 8:05AM


I've been following this kid for 25 years and this has got to be the most clutch performance of his athletic career. Before today, J Chern failed to show up when the game was on the line. From his sectional finals lax game his senior year in HS, when his little brother was the only one to score in a 14-3 loss to powerhouse Yorktoww to falling on his face in the league championship in HS hockey and arguing with teammates. Glad to see he has finally grown up. POTW for sure!
Response:

BY: boardhopper
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 8:12AM


looks like this buzz is helping his POTW chances... up to 6%
Response:

BY: noble123
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 8:47AM


just bumped into J Chern on his way to the gym to get some squats in before tonights match up with the Wranglers. He looks fired up, I think finally getting a bit of recognition has inspired him to step up his game. Would expect a big one tonight from him
Response:

BY: noble123
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 8:51AM


Sorry as referring to the 1st place Gamblers in my last post
Response:

Pre Game Meal

BY: SquatnPuke
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 8:57AM


What's a player like Josh eat before a game like this? I personally have a game tonight. I admit, I can't bring it like J Chern, but I know I can at least try and prepare like him. I know that I now need to get a few reps on the squat rack before I compete. HELP!!!
Response:

BY: witnessof25year
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 9:05AM


What time is game time? If I know JC like I think I do, he will likely go with grilled chicken with mixed vegetables and rice for dinner around 5 then have some dried apricots and unsalted almonds an hour before game time. Post game victory meal will be two whole grain rice cakes, one with hummous, the other with all natural organic fresh ground peanut butter. All man.
Response:

BY: noble123
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 9:22AM


I know a guy, who knows a guy who used to be roommates with JC and apparently the key to JC's success is not just his pre-game meals but also his sense of style. Nothin says all business like a Hanes All White T-Shirt. Rumor has it though, he has cornered the market on them, so good luck finding one for yourself.

"Gotta look good to play good"
Response:

BY: boardhopper
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 9:27AM


'JC how many white t's you pack for the weekend?'

.....


"Eight."
Response:

BY: noble123
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 10:42AM


Looks like JC has been competing like this years and wasnt going to let anything hold him back

http://www.nytimes.com/1999/03/14/nyregion/public-school-ice-hockey-expands-with-persuasion-and-parents-aid.html
Response:

???

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 11:47AM


Who the FUCK is J Chern? I have not once heard of him before today...am I missing something? What's next, Santa..NOT REAL???
Response:

BY: boardhopper
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 11:52AM


weird, a guy with a half naked woman as his avatar also cursed in his post... wish i could say i was shocked that he is so clueless.
Response:

Dark Wing Canuck?

BY: SquatnPuke
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 11:54AM


Seriously? who the fk is this guy? You've posted 280 times and you dont know who Josh Cherney is? Check the POTW site kid. Then check reality.
Response:

Wow Marshy...

BY: rgrunds
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 1:18PM


Did you read what they're posting about you....?

You're losing your credibility.....


Better get on it....

ES
Response:

It's like this

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 1:20PM


Whenever you're ready to "Squat N Puke" after "Boardhopping" yer buddy, look me up on the ice next time the Nords play. If you don't know who I am, you haven't been around long...I mean, maybe in your world cursing and partial nudity have no place, but in a man's world...kind of a BIG DEAL! Now FUCK OFF
Response:

BY: SquatnPuke
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 1:40PM


Ok Frenchy. I doubt you even get close enough to the ice to get a face wash
Response:

Yah!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 3:26PM


Ths shit is fuckin hilarious! Nice to see your two cents worth in here Marshy and Grundy!

McD
Response:

Yah!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 9:16AM


This is the shit I was talking about! Great stuff, Tuckies. Nice to see the website chatter, eh! POW voting is still open for a couple more days...

McD
Response:

Over under?

BY: Garrentee
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 12:03PM


I say the over-under on me hooking parky is 3...?

Any takers?

G
Response:

Canadian Women/McD is right

BY: rgrunds
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 1:17PM


McD is right. We need more participation. Hey, I have a question!!!!

What does a girl from Newfoundland say after her first sexual experience?

Need a little time? tough....

\"Get off me daddy, yer crushin\' my cigarettes......
Response:

Wrong

BY: hkydoc
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 3:27PM


"Yer crushin my smokes"
Response:

Tuck vs Whale

BY: Z-Skate
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 1:31PM


McD - I didn\'t see any mention of Park\'s blown offside call in the write-up ..? If Park had been paying attention at the Level-2 reffing clinic he may have made that call ..
Response:

Park's Call...

BY: kpark
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 2:27PM


...and there was no mention of the Whaler's Jay Zanleoni screaming and crying like a toddler who didn't get his way the entire game.

There was also no mention of the Whalers completely throwing defense out the window in the last minute of a game up by only one goal.

On the other hand, I'm not saying I didn't miss the call. I was exactly where I should have been, there were 4 Tuckies crossing the blue line at the same time and it was very close. I'm sticking by my call though...until there is evidence to prove otherwise.

KP
Response:

Come on

BY: hkydoc
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 3:29PM


You expect me to pay attention to EVERYTHING? I'll try harder, Z...

McD
Response:

ohh .. that touched a nerve ..

BY: Z-Skate
Feb 2nd, 2011 @ 5:26AM


I actually think the game was called pretty well with the exception of that one call ..

.. the Whale need to have a defense in order to "throw it out the window"
Response:

Hooking Parky?

BY: kpark
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 2:20PM


Hold on, were you saying that you were going to try to be my hooker? Sorry Garren, not my cup of tea, but I bet you make REALLY good money in Rutland.

If you were talking about the need to actually hook me with your hockey stick...I'm going to say zero times. If you aren't fast enough to catch me, then you should probably retire.

KP
Response:

Tuck wins 8-2

BY: kpark
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 2:21PM


Yeah, I said it. Tuckies win 8-2. Condon lets up 12 goals, not sure how that works, but that's my prediction. Meyer will take 10 PIMs not including a fight.

This should be a great game.

KP
Response:

BY: habman
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 2:24PM


Have a good game guys... wish I could make it. I'll play the UNDER 9. Plus take the prop of Garren going twice in the box.
Response:

BY: habman
Feb 3rd, 2011 @ 6:44PM


Got the PUSH with the OVER/UNDER... and a winner with Garren's visits to the sin bin.
Response:

POTW: Quit Voting for yourself Yacey

BY: SquatnPuke
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 3:05PM


You can\'t vote for yourself bro. 100 votes in 5 minutes? come on. who do you think you\'re fooling?
Response:

BY: noble123
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 3:12PM


I mean cheating your own teammate out of a POTW award....that is just wrong. Gonna be awfully tough looking JC in the eyes at tonights game
Response:

Ouch!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 3:31PM


The accusations fly! Fellas - it is POW, eh, not POTW. Save yourslf some carpal tunnel syndrome and drop the "T" so you can still pull the goalie when you're 45 (like Grundy, but with farm animal porn).

McD
Response:

BY: SquatnPuke
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 3:40PM


Unlike you and the terrorist that started this website, I respect and reserve the POW acronym for Prisoners of War. I'll stick with POTW thank you very much.
Response:

BY: boardhopper
Feb 2nd, 2011 @ 6:51AM


http://unrealitymag.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/slow-clap.gif
Response:

Quit it Yacey

BY: SquatnPuke
Feb 2nd, 2011 @ 11:22AM


seriously Yacey? you send out emails to the entire b school pumping yourself for POTW votes? Bush League. J chern goes about his biz, sets the tone EARLY last night, and you let 4 limp wristers in? Kid does nothing but hustle and your stuffing the ballot box with Bogus votes from wannabe fans? shit's gotta stop bro
Response:

I hate to agree

BY: noble123
Feb 2nd, 2011 @ 11:29AM


with Squatnpuke but enough is enough. Even someone as talented and determined as JC can't carry his whole team plus a goalie that would let my grandma stuff a beachball 5-hole on him. You might want to send another email to your weenie 2nd year B-School class that you failed them once again (just like you did on that last group project) and tell them that you have stepped out of the race for the coveted POTW
Response:

domestic pets

BY: rgrunds
Feb 1st, 2011 @ 5:51PM


please make the correction.

They're so soft and nice.

fluffy too....
Response:

Serious DRAMA in Tuck BRO-MANCE Love Triangle!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 2nd, 2011 @ 12:21PM


WoW, with one side scrambling to get \"Weekly MVP\" Nods ( notice I respected your coveted POW acronym) , and another side Man-crushing on JChern, and another one or two chirping in the background, the Tuckies...seem to need a strern talking-to from Team Patriarch McGovernator.
Response:

BY: SquatnPuke
Feb 2nd, 2011 @ 12:55PM


Weekly MVP is a great idea. You should hand out trophies each week. The ladies would probably start confusing J Chern's dorm room with Michael Phelps' in about a month.

And who the hell is the "Governator"? You weigh 190 bro. Get real kid.
Response:

BY: boardhopper
Feb 2nd, 2011 @ 1:27PM


Dark Canuck is getting absolutely owned on his own website.
Response:

Don't Worry About Governator

BY: rgrunds
Feb 2nd, 2011 @ 1:35PM


He's the one who has posted pictures of boys with whom he would like to spend time without clothing.

Governator......He went to some Junior College and forged his transcripts for Dartmouth. He has no credibility to moderate dispute resolution.

You're better off getting an 8-Ball or something.
Response:

BY: boardhopper
Feb 2nd, 2011 @ 1:45PM


Rumor alert: tuckies are breaking out a secret weapon for the next game to team up with the unstoppable knight in white-tshirts, JCHERN.

Codename: Huge. Best Skill: Wrecking Sh1t.

He's lived in the backwoods of NH for a decade. All he does is eat raw meat and grow beards. He is coming for you all.
Response:

BY: noble123
Feb 2nd, 2011 @ 1:59PM


I have never had the pleasure of seeing him play, but the stories I have heard about him have been awfully impressive. I would hate to be the next team that has to face em. Sure hope it isnt the over-the-hill Nords....this guy comes to play
Response:

Lacey you serious?

BY: knuckle puck
Feb 2nd, 2011 @ 2:04PM


with this hair cut?
http://www.dartmouth.edu/~mhockey/dmh0102/profiles/yacey.html
Response:

Hustle

BY: SquatnPuke
Feb 2nd, 2011 @ 2:36PM


That's the word I've heard thrown around to describe this Huge kid's game. Guy led the nation blocked shots per game with 2.3. Haven't seen numbers like that since the Gulag League back in '22
Response:

HEY COMMISH...

BY: noble123
Feb 3rd, 2011 @ 9:21AM


When does POTW voting end? Want to make sure that dweeb Yacey doesn\'t try any other shady moves right at the end of voting. Would hate to have to call in question the legitimacy of this award
Response:

BY: G.Nogi
Feb 3rd, 2011 @ 9:27AM


josh cherney? seriously? if i ever see this kid around I guarantee an atomic wedgie.
Response:

ok guy

BY: SquatnPuke
Feb 3rd, 2011 @ 10:30AM


You'd be wise to avoid trying to wedgie J Chern. he'd have you hanging from a fence by your tight whiteys before you could even get within a yard of his underpants
Response:

Hey noble 123...

BY: hkydoc
Feb 3rd, 2011 @ 10:32AM


I usually stop the voting on Thursday of the following week during my stint running the league for half of the season. I'm not sure when Kelly did it, but he sits at a computer all day. I can't even look at it until Thursday at the earliest. I should have the new POW nominees up by Sat.

See you on the ice!

McD
Response:

NOBODY ON THE ICE UNTIL THE DOOR ARE CLOSED!!!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 3rd, 2011 @ 10:38AM


Thanks to a bonehead move by an unnamed Brewer, your pre-game routine has been cut short a little bit because he shot a puck at the net right by the zamboni driver TWICE while the slush was being shoveled and before the doors were closed this past Tuesday night.

Union Arena requests that from now on nobody goes on the ice before the doors are closed. I request that you do not touch the pucks yourselves until we throw them out, or the doors are fully shut. If you screw up, you WILL be suspended.

Honestly, this player put us all at risk. Two or three seasons ago the zamboni driver at Hartford got hit in the testicle with a shot when some idiot missed the net. I was there, and it wasn\'t pretty. I did the Workman\'s Comp report myself, believe it or not. Lucklily only that individual player was suspended from Hartford for one full year, and the group that rented it did not lose their ice time. Need I say more?

See you on the ice! (after the frickin\' doors are closed!)

McD
Response:

Didn't go unnoticed

BY: vtdownhiller
Feb 3rd, 2011 @ 12:45PM


That didn't go unnoticed in the locker room and Charette has officially placed him " on the bubble " for it. Before he puts him on waivers we are entertaining trade offers and would could consider a case of beer and a player to be made later
Response:

Tuck\'s Josh Cherney wins POW for Jan 25th

BY: hkydoc
Feb 3rd, 2011 @ 10:49AM


In a frenzy of voting Tuck forward Josh Cherney overtook goaltending teammate Dan Yacey for the UVHL\'s Player of the Week for January 25th garnering 43% of the votes. Cherney scored one of two regulation goals and the pivotal shootout goal to extend the shootout to extra frames for the eventual Tuck victory. Yacey sported a .932 Save Percentage in the game, and went 5 for 7 in the shootout receiving 37% of the votes. The Forum chatter from Tuck was hilarious this week leading up to the POW decision!

Regardless, Tuck gets a case of beer from Long Trail Brewery. Enjoy!

See you on the ice!

McD
Response:

Congratulations to Mr. Black

BY: rgrunds
Feb 6th, 2011 @ 2:48PM


Hej. Dobra Czerni!

Mmmmmmm. bier....
Response:

One hundred players/Eight hundred votes

BY: rgrunds
Feb 3rd, 2011 @ 10:50AM


Wow. There are between 80 to 100 players in the league. Cherney and Yacey accumulated about 800 votes for POW. Did the voting spontaneously extend to citizens of Woodstock and mindless Tuck groupies?

It\'s so fun here.....

















Response:

BY: knuckle puck
Feb 3rd, 2011 @ 12:06PM


If all of Cherney's groupies found this website he would have won by a whole lot more
Response:

BY: boardhopper
Feb 3rd, 2011 @ 12:17PM


i heard your mom was voting
Response:

BY: noble123
Feb 3rd, 2011 @ 12:25PM


Hey Grund....you sound a little bitter. You think it is because you have never won POTW?
Response:

Bitter?

BY: rgrunds
Feb 3rd, 2011 @ 6:56PM


I'm mindlessly happy. I become delerious with just some gum and a piece of velcro....

Don't worry, I'm gonna win POW someday....
Response:

Robbery

BY: Grambo
Feb 4th, 2011 @ 10:03PM


It only looks selfish when you get robbed of two assists on the scoresheet. 3G and no helpers definitely looks more selfish then the 3G and 2A it should have been... Just sayin
Response:

BY: Grambo
Feb 4th, 2011 @ 10:05PM


Only six numbers in each color all night... zebras must get confused watching so many people.
Response:

Bold prediction

BY: stevekenning
Feb 6th, 2011 @ 1:04PM


Tuck takes this one 12-0. Hay gets a hat trick. M. Halsey Coughlin gets a Gordie Howe hat trick. Yacey nets his first career goal, top cheese from our blue line. I'll probably get an assist.

WABOOM.

There you go McD.
Response:

Yah!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 7th, 2011 @ 11:40AM


Now thats the shit I'm talkin' about! Too bad no Dead River players ever read this or respond to it though. Thanks, Steve!

McD
Response:

Pre-Game Predictions

BY: SK8VT
Feb 8th, 2011 @ 8:05AM


A few guarenteed things to happen tonight...

Gary Lapearle - Probably get hooked hooked atleast 9 times on the way to the net not getting one call and NOT bitching about it

Jason - Probably bitch about how he actually got 3 of Jays assits when actually not even on the ice

Kenny - Will have Park wondering why he was the failure in the family robbing him of atleast one open net slap shot

Kelly - Feeding me for atleast 6 breakaways tonight

Me - Missing about 6 breakaways tonight

MCD - 3 games / 4.5 hours...2 buckets of chicken wings

Marshy - Have atleast 1 illegal drug in his system by gametime

Chuck G - make sure to leave 10 min early to pick up a couple pounders for the ride home before the store closes

Liam - give atleast 3 of the Nords players heartattacks, maybe even putting JT on suicide watch for the night

Pooch - 3 roughing penalties that arent his fault...

Racci - Hitting one of his own players with a blistering slap shot 5 ft. from the net

Jay - netting a hatty and 6 point night, one coming from a 90mph slap shot from the blue line, or killing JT (one or the other)

Tommy - probably the only player on both teams that wont fuck up tonight

Nords win 14-13 in a shoutout
Response:

Yah!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 8th, 2011 @ 10:47AM


I fucking love it, Jordy! Don't forget the blue cheese and celery, too. Diet coke for sure as well... I'm watching my waistline... grow...

McD
Response:

Quite the race for Feb 1st POW!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 8th, 2011 @ 10:52AM


I was just about to shut down the POW because I was sure someone was cheating with over 1300 votes cast, BUT I see that it is a legit 2 man race between \"Mr. Windup\" Jason Young and Gary \"Laperle Necklace\". Each nominee has over 630 votes, and they are within 30 of one another, so it will continue until Wed or Thurs (I\'ll keep you guessing as to when I\'ll shut it down). Good luck, eh! Somebody really wants that case of beer...

McD
Response:

WTF?

BY: hkydoc
Feb 8th, 2011 @ 10:53AM


Are you guys too lazy or disinterested to bother with any pre-game chatter? This is supposed to be fun, MF's! Have you got the mid-season blues? :(...

McD
Response:

WTF?

BY: goaliem31
Feb 8th, 2011 @ 11:33AM


nah,
guys just don't want to be looked at as though they are whining on here as well.
so they would rather say nothing, so that you dont have something else to say we are whining about.
if any one looks like a big whiner, its you cause your soap box takes up most of the write ups... lol
Response:

90 mph slapper

BY: Z-Skate
Feb 8th, 2011 @ 11:51AM


You know Jordy my slapper usually turns into a good break-out for the opposition .. WIDE RIGHT, WIDE LEFT.
Response:

THINK ABOUT IT

BY: WHINER
Feb 8th, 2011 @ 12:00PM


THINK ABOUT IT.Keep UR DAMN MOUTH SHUT
Response:

BY: goaliem31
Feb 8th, 2011 @ 12:09PM


no clue who you are... but maybe you should do your homework before you open your mouth at all...
Response:

I have thought Long and HARD

BY: WHINER
Feb 8th, 2011 @ 12:35PM


I dont know you you dont know me but lets just play some hockey and stop all this complaining..This isnt a FUCKING REALITY SHOW. Yet I know there are some people in this league, that wish it was or they act like they want to take part in Reality SHOW..
MCd You should see an amazing game tonite if you just put down the ipod stop talking into the little microphone, and just run the damn clock......COME ON.. It s a good thing they dont let food from outside the rink in the scorkeeper box or you would be eating too..LOL
Be good Fella's
Response:

BY: goaliem31
Feb 8th, 2011 @ 2:06PM


Good repost!!! LOL
Let's Have Fun Boys!!! It's the best day of the week!!!
Response:

Brilliant Jordy!

BY: kpark
Feb 8th, 2011 @ 1:34PM


I have a feeling Jordy will score on at least 2 breakaways. The kid has been snake bitten and tonight feels like the one!

I'm taking the OVER on Buckets of wings that McD will eat.
Response:

Uh huh

BY: hkydoc
Feb 8th, 2011 @ 2:35PM


That is a good bet, Parky!

McD
Response:

Racci

BY: PMayhew
Feb 8th, 2011 @ 1:54PM


2/1 odds Racci hits me with the slapshot from 5ft out
Response:

Yah!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 8th, 2011 @ 2:34PM


Now THAT is the shit I've been talking about! Evidence that at least one Gambler actually read a write-up, and some ball busting back and forth, and even directed to ME! Wow. I'm impressed. Do they deliver wings to the scorebox?

McD
Response:

WOW WHAT A GAME

BY: WHINER
Feb 9th, 2011 @ 1:52PM



Response:

Appropriate Topic?

BY: rgrunds
Feb 10th, 2011 @ 11:18AM


I detect sexual innuendo on this site.

Should the webmaster be notified?
Response:

Nice pic!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 12th, 2011 @ 4:10PM


I love the pic, Grundy! Is that you? I thought you just wore your hat during warm-ups...

The webmaster & commishes are fully aware of the sexual innuendos on this site. The latent homosexual flavor is something we work very hard at.

McD
Response:

You noticed my hat....

BY: rgrunds
Feb 12th, 2011 @ 6:19PM


This all makes me feel just delicious.


Response:

Next week....

BY: WHINER
Feb 10th, 2011 @ 7:45PM


I can\'t wait 2 play next week! CU Next Tuesday!!
Response:

Next WEEK???????

BY: whiner2
Feb 11th, 2011 @ 2:26PM


What is meant by a comment left on the website(I cant wait 2 play next week)
Nobody is complaining this week on the website. Nobody was dumb enough to shoot the puck at the Zamboni guy. and there werent any fights...The league is really looking up.....I guess
Response:

Okay...

BY: hkydoc
Feb 12th, 2011 @ 4:00PM


Did you not get a response and feel like you needed to explain what you meant, Whiner? Trust me, somebody is ALWAYS complaining. My anatomy teacher in university used to say "You can't please everyone, so just please yourself". Words to live by for sure...

See you on the ice!

McD
Response:

My Take on WHINING

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 13th, 2011 @ 11:26AM


I am not a UVHL referee, nor am I a COMMISH of the UVHL. But I do agree that the level of whining and abuse of the officials is ridiculous. McD and Kelly have stated many times if you have not yet ref'd a game, you have no right to bitch about a call. I MOSTLY agree with that. Having no instant replay and only their point of view to make a call, the refs are undoubtedly going to miss a call here and there. I have voiced my opinion now and then, but never have I lowered myself to "Frenchy-like" tantrums, or verbally abusing a ref.
I would like to someday complete the USA Officials reffing clinic, not only to understand the game officially, but to see the game from a different point of view. Frankly, I'm suprised more guys haven't been kicked out of games for their excessive B.S. A couple of years ago, the refs we had, were dead serious about quitting if we did't stop the bitching and just play the game. It seemed to get better, but as of late it seems all that's talked about. There are DEFINITELY a few players that I will NOT name, that are regulars in that dept. that need to be sent a msg by the refs. Play the game, have your CAPTAIN dispute a call when necessary, and play a clean game. I guess when guys still play the game at such a competitie level, the competitive spirit is on overload at times...
LOVE THE PUCK, FEEL THE HATE.
Response:

Any predictions?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 12th, 2011 @ 12:29PM


I'm hoping all the hype and admiration this J CHERN kid gets is backed up by some on-ice performance. His followers have held him on a pedestal, and practically worship the ice he skates on. Just need to see for myself, if he is "The Real Deal"
Response:

Gary Laperle wins Feb 1st POW

BY: hkydoc
Feb 12th, 2011 @ 4:05PM


In his first ever nomination, Gary \"Laperle Necklace\" wins the UVHL\'s Player of the Week for Feb 1st. Laperle had a career game with 2G, 2A in 9-2 Whalers victory, and received 945 votes. How? We will never know... But the race was legit as 2nd place Jason \"Mr. Windup\" Young received 697 votes for his 2 goals from the point on Yacey including the GWG and 1A in a 4-2 Gamblers win.

Enjoy the beer, eh!

McD
Response:

LaPerle

BY: rgrunds
Feb 13th, 2011 @ 11:14AM


the face of the UVHL......
Response:

We're Doomed, Marshy.

BY: hkydoc
Feb 12th, 2011 @ 8:08PM


My prediction is that you'll barely get a shot on Yacey with McGovern, Helming, and Johnson patrolling the blueline on Tuesday. I'll be in the scorebox this week, and that might actually help us cuz I'd just be a fat pylon out there against them anyway. Thankfully I made my debut against the Whale instead of Tuck or the Gamblers... and I still got roasted by Gramling.

McD
Response:

Yup.

BY: stevekenning
Feb 13th, 2011 @ 5:24PM


Tuck takes this one 6-0. Helming scores all 6, unassisted. I'll probably ice the puck a few times.

COUNT IT.
Response:

Well....

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 14th, 2011 @ 8:41AM


Kenning, you may be right on there. And McD, I WILL get a shot on net..even if I have to shoot it from our own end. We are going to be really short on bodies...but nevertheless, we will give it our all. Hockey is NIRVANA
Response:

Short benches on both sides

BY: McG
Feb 15th, 2011 @ 6:42AM


Should be a game. I'll fall in the neutral zone at least once and curse like a sailor.
Response:

UNREAL picture

BY: WHINER
Feb 13th, 2011 @ 8:06PM


http://boston.barstoolsports.com/random-thoughts/my-face-hurts-but-i-dont-know-why/
Response:

Saw that!

BY: Garrentee
Feb 14th, 2011 @ 10:14AM


Pretty sick!!
Response:

A Man\'s Fairy Tale

BY: vtdownhiller
Feb 15th, 2011 @ 7:12AM


Once upon a time, a Prince asked a beautiful Princess Will you marry me? The Princess said NO And the Prince lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles and fucked skinny big titted broads and hunted And raced cars and went to naked bars and dated women half his age and drank whiskey, beer and Tequilla and never heard bitching and never paid child support or alimony and kept his house and guns and never got cheated on while he was at work and all his friends and family thought he was fuckin cool as hell and had tons of money in the bank and left the toilet seat up ..... The end

Response:

HA HA HA

BY: kpark
Feb 15th, 2011 @ 8:40AM


I almost pissed myself reading this. I then had to show it to my boss and a coworker...too f'in funny.

KP
Response:

Fuckin' BRILLIANT!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 15th, 2011 @ 12:49PM


I LOVE IT! Tell me another awesome story. Who is this fuckin' cool as hell guy, anyway? I definitely know several guys who it isn't!

McD
Response:

STILL funny!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 21st, 2011 @ 4:35PM


This is still making me laugh a week later!

McD
Response:

Believe it!

BY: 1stPeriod
Feb 15th, 2011 @ 8:27AM


A prediction for the DR game:

DR has 7 players show. Following the Gamblers mandatory pep-talk/steroid injection they'll step on the ice and piss off at least 5 of the 7 DR players for skating too hard and actually back checking.

Meyer lights the lamp (do we have one of those?).

J takes a clapper and will nearly take someone's face off.

Marrazzo and Topo will dangle everyone in the rink at least twice.

Ammel blasts a slapper just inside the post past Feiden's glove.

Allison will hack 3 DR players in the 1st period.

Duggan will throw a few body checks so he can rest in the sin bin.

Loomis's backhand will be active, though I predict he'll either slide it under the crossbar or miss 5 ft wide.

Scully will show up and lose the puck at the blueline resulting in a goal.

Feiden will get taken to school, lose his jock after a breakaway from Topo, and will be found tying a noose in the bathroom after the game.
Response:

YEAAAH!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 15th, 2011 @ 9:02AM


I fuckin' love it! Great job, 1stPeriod! FINALLY, some contribution from a Dead River Oiler! Let me guess... one or two of you might actually go to Bentley's post-game tonight?

McD
Response:

See you at the bar!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 15th, 2011 @ 9:00AM


I hope some of you guys are still hangin' around for when I arrive after the late game, eh! Mmm... wings!

McD
Response:

WOW

BY: WHINER
Feb 15th, 2011 @ 9:07AM


I dont know who you are 1stperiod , from lyme... But your pregame so called Prediction is amazing. Its like you have played on multiple UVHL teams and you seem to know some inside intel that was only intended for the G men. Not only is this league like a Reality show it has now stepped into the next level of talking about what goes on in the Gmen Locker room pre game...There is no talking though and that has me concerned.. We hope the Best for FIEDEN and Topo. I hope that they can some how figure out this fucked up noose thing.. dont tie it too tight..
Good luck to all This will be a blast of a game..
Response:

Kinda Harsh McD

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 15th, 2011 @ 1:02PM


I'm sure SOME of Hadley's ex's were less than pure as the driven snow, but the last one he had was a pretty cool chick, and definitely NOT a whore...just sayin buddy!
Response:

O.K. That Does It I Don\'t Get Anything

BY: rgrunds
Feb 18th, 2011 @ 2:55PM


O.K. McD gets to post this about the Whaler\'s new player:

\"Where they got him from, I don\'t know, but apparently they don\'t keep their pants up there... Must be somewhere in the \"hood\" in downtown Lebanon where the 2 or 3 people of color in the Upper Valley must hang out\"

But I don\'t get to make one little joke about whydowomenhavevaginas?Becausenoonewouldtalktothemiftheydidn\'t.

McD gets to go on about Neegrowes, but I get chastised by Park for \"crossing a line about a mile ago\" when I posted the same, admirable joke referenced above.

Hypocrites.
Response:

I thought it was funny...

BY: hkydoc
Feb 21st, 2011 @ 3:28PM


I laughed at your joke, Grundy. Who got sensitive about it? The Gamblers? I think I remember that from last season sometime... Once and a while we get flack on here and have to be politically correct... but not all the time.

McD
Response:

It was all Kelly...Kelly Park

BY: rgrunds
Feb 21st, 2011 @ 5:19PM


He wanted to act like he has principles or something.

Whatever they are.....
Response:

Dan Ammel wins Feb 8th POW

BY: hkydoc
Feb 21st, 2011 @ 3:41PM


Gamblers big winger Dan Ammel scored a Natural Hat Trick in the 2nd & added 2 more goals and 1 assist for 6 points against the Brewers, while linemate and power winger Matt Marrazzo scored 1 goal & added 4 assists for 5 points in the same 7-3 win over the Brewers on February 8th. Ammel received 139 votes, and Marrazzo 54. It was a scorefest of a night that saw 2 players get 6 points, and 2 players get 5 points.

Enjoy the Long Trail, Dan!

McD
Response:

I'm gonna shut down Duggan

BY: hkydoc
Feb 22nd, 2011 @ 8:51AM


No unassisted, shorthanded, or any other kind of goals for you tonight while McDefense is on the ice, Evan! Be prepared to cry in your beer... :(....

If I'm wrong, then your first beer is on me post-game, eh.

McD
Response:

McDefense wins

BY: hkydoc
Feb 22nd, 2011 @ 11:04PM


No beer for Evan tonight, he scored with McD on the bench.
Response:

HEY!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 22nd, 2011 @ 8:52AM


FUCK YOU GUYS! Where is the pre-game chatter?

McD
Response:

WTF?

BY: hkydoc
Feb 22nd, 2011 @ 8:52AM


FUCK YOU GUYS! Where is the pre-game chatter?

McD
Response:

We'll only need 30

BY: stevekenning
Feb 22nd, 2011 @ 4:28PM


Tuck takes it 18-0, wins by TKO after two periods, heads to Bentley's early.
Response:

Close!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 22nd, 2011 @ 11:05PM


You almost called it right, Steve! Great job post-game by the Tuckies, too.

McD
Response:

You guys SUCK

BY: hkydoc
Feb 22nd, 2011 @ 11:06PM


Not even one pre-game comment this week...

McD
Response:

You guys SUCK!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 22nd, 2011 @ 11:18PM


Only one pre-game comment this week by the very dedicated Steve Kenning of Tuck proves to me that you guys SUCK! Why should I spend over an hour on each game write-up, and 15 minutes on the pre-game reports if they aren\'t being appreciated and read? SHOW me that you read them, no matter if you like them or hate them. Give us some shit, make some bold pre-game predictions, issue challenges putting a beer on the line, and have some fun off the ice on the best adult hockey league website EVER. Parky and I love the league, the website, and the banter. Please make it worth our while and SHOW us you read all of our bullshit. We can\'t do it without you! Stop sucking! (except you, Steve... you don\'t suck!)

McD
Response:

Please don't say "suck"

BY: rgrunds
Feb 23rd, 2011 @ 8:57AM


I think that term is a sexual reference and makes me uncomfortable.

Why doesn't everyone just think nice thoughts?


Response:

BY: Pmayhew4
Feb 23rd, 2011 @ 12:51PM


I'll make a general prediction that everytime the nords play dead river jordan will miss 10 breakaways because feiden owns him...I'm not going to pass you the puck anymore jordan, pucks are going raci's way now, he finishes or atleast he takes somebody out with a slapshot head high from the bottom of the circle...hkydoc rumor has it you couldn't even finish your wings last week...
Response:

JT can I discuss beer with you....?

BY: rgrunds
Feb 26th, 2011 @ 4:23PM


Um...like 407 others, I voted for you, but I Really NEED beer. The other people just voted 8 times each for a different reason.


Really John, please...
Response:

Somebody is...

BY: hkydoc
Feb 27th, 2011 @ 7:38PM


...fucking with us. Nobody knows who is voting so much each week, and Park's coding skills are lacking far behind any hackers that bypass his 1 vote per hour limit. Beer is good!

McD
Response:

CMon McD

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 27th, 2011 @ 6:33AM


STILL no game write-ups? No box scores? Nada? Not that I was a factor in our win over the Oilers, but not knowing what happened with the other games is KILLING me (lol). Just think of all the die-hard Uvie fans across the globe, just chomping at the bit for a write up or a box score of their fave player\'s tallys. Seriously...put down the bleu, sanitize those buffalo-soaked hands, and get to typing. For fuck sakes, it\'ll be Tues. again in a couple days....ahhhh TUESDAY!!!!
Response:

Payback??

BY: Grambo
Feb 27th, 2011 @ 3:39PM


I think this might be a payback for the lack of chatter in last week's pregame's. McD seemed a little devastated that nobody commented on his New York Time's worthy write-ups. He'll probably come out of his cave on Tuesday around Noon (after lunch of course) to give us his opinions on this week.
Response:

No dice, eh.

BY: hkydoc
Feb 27th, 2011 @ 5:51PM


I was in New Brunswick and left Thursday morning and got back about 20 minutes ago, eh. I had to attend a family funeral... not trying to make you guys feel guilty, just stating the facts. I'm starting the stats now and will start the write-ups on Tuesday. I'm glad to see that at least two people are upset that it isn't all done yet!

See you on the ice!

McD
Response:

You are a.....

BY: kpark
Feb 28th, 2011 @ 2:27PM


SLACKER! You should brought your personal assistant in the car with you and dictated the recaps to them!
Response:

I'm bored...

BY: 1stPeriod
Feb 27th, 2011 @ 11:09AM


... thus a prediction.

Both teams have been plagued by inconsistencies at all positions. I look for this game to be a close battle with plenty of shots on both goaltenders. It's going to come down to who shows up for each team, but with DR's Rob Pattison guaranteed to be out, the rest of DR will have to chip in to make up for the absence of Pattison's scoring prowess.

I say the game will end 4-3, either way, but I'm going to give my nod to DR who have been playing strong defense the past couple of weeks.
Response:

Young Blood

BY: Grambo
Feb 27th, 2011 @ 7:48PM


Well... the Whale might be adding some young talent in the next couple weeks with some of our young fellas finishing up their seasons. At least we know these guys will make it to all the remaining games. This should help solidify some solid numbers for the Whale, and hopefully bringing along some W's with it.
Response:

John Turner wins Feb 15th POW

BY: hkydoc
Feb 27th, 2011 @ 7:57PM


Nords goaltender John Turner faced 45 shots & earned a 0.956 save percentage in a 2-1 loss against Tuck and received a total of 409 votes to edge Gamblers goaltender Jered Condon with 329 votes. Condon faced 24 shots & earned a 0.958 save percentage in a 3-1 win over Dead River. Four hot goaltenders were nominated for POW this week!

McD


Response:

sigh...beer

BY: rgrunds
Feb 28th, 2011 @ 9:04AM


JT, you're gonna remember the people who made this possible...right?
Response:

Hey Grundy

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 1st, 2011 @ 11:14AM


I tell you what, you come tonight, and watch us give the Gamblers a run for their money (hopefully pulling out a W) and I'll buy you a cold and tasty Long Trail...post game. How's that?
Response:

Marshy

BY: rgrunds
Mar 1st, 2011 @ 11:48AM


my negro...

nice offer. I have to play in Burlington tomorrow at 6:30 a.m.

Should be a good game. Get JT a stuffed bunny he can keep on the net to make him feel safe.
Response:

Nice!

BY: hkydoc
Mar 1st, 2011 @ 2:51PM


I love it, 1stPeriod!

McD
Response:

Nords top line will keep pace

BY: hkydoc
Mar 1st, 2011 @ 2:52PM


It will come down to the depth players as I predict the Three Youts will keep pace with the MMA line tonight! YAAAAAH! GO NORDS!

McD
Response:

You can only hope...

BY: hkydoc
Mar 1st, 2011 @ 2:53PM


Keep the dream alive, Grambo! Remember, you have to play in 4 UVHL games to qualify for the playoffs, eh.

McD
Response:

Prophetic?

BY: 1stPeriod
Mar 2nd, 2011 @ 10:18AM


A 4-3 DR victory.
Response:

McD Help!

BY: rgrunds
Mar 4th, 2011 @ 4:38AM


I think JT has been...um.....\"touching\" himself. How else can we explain 5 goals on 24 shots? Every real goalie knows that this sort of behavior causes permanent nerve damage. Perhaps an adjustment session and conselling with your could restore him.

a concerned citizen.
Response:

It aint his fault

BY: hkydoc
Mar 4th, 2011 @ 12:07PM


We let JT down badly in that game against the Gamblers, and I gave up the 2-on-1 for the GWG. We only managed 11 SOG. PATHETIC!

There is no adjustment for that curious condition which you describe... Come to think of it, my hands are completely numb...

McD
Response:

IT ANT UR FAULT

BY: WHINER
Mar 4th, 2011 @ 1:52PM


ITS UR MOUTH!!!!! It is such a Great time to watch different teams Play the G Men.....You have teams that have no character at all and then you have teams with some great guys on them but when you put a hockey stick in there hands WE ALL BECOME A BUNCH OF FUCKING NEANDERTHALS...who want to outlive the dream of being a hero or just that guy that can do everything..but what it really means is that we all suck just a couple of guys in the league have come to terms with it..JT had no D what so ever that night...Lets not feel sorry for him lets give him the defense the old bastard deserves..AND never be jealous of a fellow UVHLer just because there faster and better than you...THERE will always be next week..
Response:

blindness too

BY: rgrunds
Mar 4th, 2011 @ 5:15PM


maybe that explains the blindness Hadley claimed against me.


Response:

McD check your office email

BY: rgrunds
Mar 6th, 2011 @ 2:00PM


Shawn,

check your personal account. Important message.


ES
Response:

Just sent it

BY: hkydoc
Mar 7th, 2011 @ 8:54PM


Check your e-mail, Bob.

Shawn
Response:

UVHL needs better staff

BY: stevekenning
Mar 4th, 2011 @ 11:25AM


I got recorded as having taken a penalty? I don't take penalties. I don't play aggressively enough to take penalties. I'm rarely within 15 ft of the puck.

Give them to Barnett. He could use to pad his stats.
Response:

Ooops!

BY: hkydoc
Mar 4th, 2011 @ 12:41PM


Are you sure? Who is the guilty party then? The refs sometimes report the wrong # and our scorekeeper isn't always aware enough to check if it is right or not. I just think you're sore from getting a penalty and needed to vent. Do you feel better now? I like the 2 goals you scored in that game, Stevie. The penalty just makes you look tougher! Don Cherry would be proud.

McD
Response:

Matt Marrazzo wins Feb 22nd POW

BY: hkydoc
Mar 4th, 2011 @ 4:55PM


Gamblers power winger Matt Marrazzo, the UVHL\'s second leading scorer gets 3G, 2A in a 12-5 win vs. the Whalers and 74 votes to top linemate and league leading scorer Will Meyer, who had a 7 points night with 3G, 4A night and 48 votes. Regardless, the Gamblers get the beer this week! Enjoy!


Response:

Tuck on spring break - need bodies for scrimmage

BY: McG
Mar 7th, 2011 @ 2:57PM


Only three Turduckens will be lacing \'em up against the Gamblers tomorrow due to school break -- we\'ll need some guys for the scrimmage if anyone feels like hanging around.

Let me know.
Response:

I'll hang around and skate

BY: Z-Skate
Mar 7th, 2011 @ 6:50PM



Response:

Pugsley

BY: rgrunds
Mar 8th, 2011 @ 6:23AM


do you need a goalie?
Response:

BY: McG
Mar 8th, 2011 @ 7:05AM


All set with a keeper.
Response:

IN!

BY: kpark
Mar 8th, 2011 @ 7:00AM


I'm definitely in. See you guys tonight.

KP
Response:

JT Household maintenance

BY: rgrunds
Mar 8th, 2011 @ 6:31AM


JT. I forgot to ask; does your wife ever complain about the stains on the ceiling?

That\'s what happens when you do bad things.....

It\'s a completely scientific fact..


tsk tsk....
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Mar 8th, 2011 @ 11:05AM


R u High McD...Brewers by 1...you call yourself a Nord? just look at the league picks, they never lie...
Nordicks take this one 5 or 6 to 3
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Mar 8th, 2011 @ 11:08AM


feeling an upset tonight
Response:

I must remain neutral...

BY: hkydoc
Mar 8th, 2011 @ 11:54AM


...or at least try my best to do so. It also helps get the discussion goin', doesn't it? The Nords are my favorite in my heart...

McD
Response:

Oooooh!

BY: hkydoc
Mar 8th, 2011 @ 11:55AM


An upset? Are the Whalers due?

McD
Response:

Its a shame

BY: hkydoc
Mar 8th, 2011 @ 11:57AM


Too bad your only competition is away on Spring Break, Gamblers... I would have liked to see this match-up go down properly in the books with something other than a default win, but that is just how the schedule worked out. Have fun tonight, and see you at Bentley's afterwards for our last week at Union Arena.

McD
Response:

Whale Win if ..

BY: Z-Skate
Mar 8th, 2011 @ 2:21PM


1) Nicky Hall doesn't eat a large pizza ..
2) Gambling decides to pass on a 2 on 1 instead of shooting from below the goal line ..
3) Gary "the pearl" isn't grounded after his "talk" with corporate
4) I limit the slappers to zero ..

I guess it's hopeless.
Response:

Mudleague?

BY: kpark
Mar 9th, 2011 @ 10:37AM


Hey guys, is anyone looking for another player for their mudleague team? I\'m looking to play and I\'m hoping it\'s not too late.

Thanks,
Kelly
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Mar 10th, 2011 @ 7:43AM


i will ask my team tonight, im playing with the wise guys, i can only make a couple games so if u wanted we could probably split the games atleast, maybe we need more players
Response:

Iceland girls are easy....

BY: rgrunds
Mar 13th, 2011 @ 8:49AM


they\'ll do anything for a preserved sheep head.
Response:

Iceland girls are easy....

BY: rgrunds
Mar 13th, 2011 @ 8:49AM


they\'ll do anything for a preserved sheep head.
Response:

Really?

BY: hkydoc
Mar 13th, 2011 @ 11:23AM


It must be true if you posted it twice, Grundy.

McD
Response:

I just get excited

BY: rgrunds
Mar 13th, 2011 @ 11:42AM


Actually, it's true. Iceland has THE most unusual cuisine in the world. Lots of salted, preserved and buried stuff.
Response:

James Hay wins March 1st POW

BY: hkydoc
Mar 13th, 2011 @ 11:21AM


Tuck winger James Hay scored 2G and added 3A in his UVHL Swan Song as he headed out of town for his biggest score - an Icelandic princess and a baby on the way receiving 539 votes. Gamblers winger and runner up Dan Ammel scored 2G including the clutch GWG shorty against the Nords in a 5-2 win earning 452 votes.

Enjoy the beer, eh!

McD

Response:

Another Tuck forfeit -- need skaters again @ 9:50 vs. DR

BY: McG
Mar 14th, 2011 @ 11:42AM


Tuck is on break again the early half of this week and we\'re in need of skaters. We should have 4 guys -- if anyone\'s interested helping us fill a bench let me know.
Response:

yup...IN

BY: kpark
Mar 14th, 2011 @ 12:00PM


I'll be there with bells on.
Response:

effete, self-indulgent

BY: rgrunds
Mar 14th, 2011 @ 2:31PM


What.....Winston and Muffy are having a soiree'? Or did you guys just get your Ascots caught in a yacht's rudder?

Don't break a nail...it'll mean an entire season...
Response:

Yah!

BY: hkydoc
Mar 15th, 2011 @ 11:45AM


I think I can handle it this week! See you on the ice!

McD
Response:

Hmmm....

BY: hkydoc
Mar 15th, 2011 @ 11:33AM


I feel my first goal of the year coming on. Watch your 5-hole, Kenny! A 38 mph slapper is on its way from the blueline.

McD
Response:

McD!

BY: kpark
Mar 15th, 2011 @ 11:44AM


That is a grand 'ol prediction, McD. I think we should put you on the wing tonight, but when you score you need to skate by Lallier and say "I just shoved my Irish Biscuit in your French Five-Hole!!!!"
Response:

Hmmm

BY: Z-Skate
Mar 15th, 2011 @ 1:59PM


Kenny may be on suicide watch if McD scores .. in large part to Hadley scoring 2 on him last week.
Response:

Poor Kenny

BY: kpark
Mar 15th, 2011 @ 2:20PM


I'm going to do my best to get McD a goal...unfortunately this year, doing my best may mean staying in the locker room.

Hopefully Big Z downs a couple of cheap beers and is nice and mellow on the ice!

KP
Response:

Uh oh...

BY: hkydoc
Mar 15th, 2011 @ 11:38AM


Will we see playoff hockey from the Brew Crew tonight? Lets wait until March 29th, Fellas... Keep it cool, keep it clean, and enjoy the post-game beer! Yaaaahh!

McD
Response:

Beer NIght @ Campion

BY: NVRaWRSTR
Mar 15th, 2011 @ 11:43AM


No pre game chatter..Thats NO fun.. GOOD LUCK with that Goal Tonite McD
Response:

NVRaWRSTR?

BY: kpark
Mar 15th, 2011 @ 2:21PM


Who is this new forum participant. This one could get ugly...good thing I'm not reffing it...ahh shit, yes I am.
Response:

Last weeks comments ..

BY: Z-Skate
Mar 15th, 2011 @ 1:54PM


With the slapper comes a loss ..

The whale have been talking all day about what beer we should drink in the room (Canadien vs. American) so we may not even make it onto the ice. Gotta love Campion - it's what men's league is all about BEER !!

Oh yeah, Mrs. Hall has requested pre-game chips b/c he may, I mean will have the munchies .. So if Marshy is hungry let him know about the chips.

Response:

MMMMMMM....

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 15th, 2011 @ 3:10PM


I may indulge in pre-game festivities consisting of a 10-paper joint, and followed up with a chaser of Zima..So, I guess I'll need those chips...STAT. In all seriousness though, I WILL score...even as wasted as I plan on getting...
Response:

Bodies!

BY: kpark
Mar 15th, 2011 @ 2:22PM


Hey guys, we need bodies for this game / scrimmage tonight...and beer please!
Response:

Tuck should bring it

BY: hkydoc
Mar 15th, 2011 @ 3:44PM


Since they are defaulting, the Tuckies, all 2 of them, should bring the beer tonight, eh.
Response:

PARK

BY: NVRaWRSTR
Mar 15th, 2011 @ 2:31PM


I cant come right out and tell you but I will give you a hint... I dont take wrist shots...Only BOOMERS 5ft wide at about head level...Still wondering ...Watch out tonite..they will be flying C U tonite
Response:

Its gotta be...

BY: hkydoc
Mar 15th, 2011 @ 3:43PM


JY! All-time league leader for slapshot attempts and misses!
Response:

Nice!

BY: hkydoc
Mar 15th, 2011 @ 3:41PM


Fucking brilliant, Z! But what does it mean if I have pre=game wings and I'm NOT wasted?
Response:

Scores?

BY: rgrunds
Mar 19th, 2011 @ 1:26PM


can we have the scores? I\'m happy to help with digits if you find them puzzling.
Response:

Agreed

BY: Grambo
Mar 19th, 2011 @ 7:40PM


I agree with Grunds... what's the deal McD? Still bitter??
Response:

Scoring with himself...?

BY: rgrunds
Mar 20th, 2011 @ 9:06AM


He gets distracted....
Response:

Always bitter and disgruntled...

BY: hkydoc
Mar 20th, 2011 @ 8:52PM


...and away for the weekend! Just got back a little while ago and stats & scores are all posted now. Write-ups to follow within a couple of days.

McD
Response:

8-7? Whalers?

BY: rgrunds
Mar 21st, 2011 @ 3:50AM


Next thing you\'ll be telling me JT\'s not a virgin....

It can\'t be so...
Response:

JT????

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 21st, 2011 @ 12:56PM


Grundy, you're always bustin JT's balls...WTF? As a team, we were not only disappointed we lost, but we let down our goalie, by only scoring 7 goals. Clearly we need to score at least 8 to make him comfortable enough between the pipes. He let all of us know just how disgusted he was, and embarassed by the fact he got hung out to dry in front of the fans cheering " Daddy, Daddy" Nonetheless, we all felt shame, and hung our heads for at least long enough to get a Long Trail opened up, and savor the flavor after a tough-fought game. Re-match in the playoffs VS. the Whale...stay tuned, should be a good one!
Response:

You don't understand

BY: rgrunds
Mar 21st, 2011 @ 1:02PM


that virgin thing. It really hurts.....It's not about JT, it's about me. I was sure he'd never lie...
Response:

Whale Vs. Nords.

BY: Z-Skate
Mar 22nd, 2011 @ 6:56AM


Marshy don\'t defend JT didn\'t you see him throw his kids a puck .. I wonder if it was the Whale\'s 8th goal ..?

One suggestion for the Nords. leave it on the ice - We are at Campion and can drink in the locker room so it\'s all good !! Oh yeah, I heard McD is bringing the Whale beer today b/c he was \"free-grazing\" with the victors last week !!

I will not even ask where the write-ups are ..
Response:

where are the write ups?

BY: rgrunds
Mar 22nd, 2011 @ 8:47AM


Where are the write ups?
Response:

Nords?

BY: kpark
Mar 22nd, 2011 @ 10:47AM


I want to pick the Nords to win, but after a HORRIBLE loss to the Whalers last week, it's a tough call.

Regardless, the Nords should bounce back. Look for me to lay out McG. BAM!

I'm also going to score at least .5 goals on Yacenning...that two-headed beast in net.

KP
Response:

trouble in paradise

BY: Pmayhew4
Mar 22nd, 2011 @ 12:16PM


nords team chemistry at an all time low after two vets verbally assault eachother in the locker room. The argument even reached an uncomfortable and abusive level of them telling eachother they suck, which prompted one to pass on the postgame beer (unacceptable).It remains to be seen how damaged their egos are. Can they kiss and makeup and return to being BFFs?? either way, Nords by 1
Response:

Never have I ever ..

BY: Z-Skate
Mar 22nd, 2011 @ 1:30PM


Want to be Nord. until this last post .. who passes on postgame beer ..?
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Mar 22nd, 2011 @ 1:46PM


Some people just cant handle there alchohol, tonight we will have to cut park and turner off at 1/2 a beer postgame so we dont read about how 2 mens league over the hill hockey players got in a bitch fight over a hockey game...then again we did lose to the fuckin whale...so i guess they did have a point
Response:

Whalers?!?!?

BY: kpark
Mar 22nd, 2011 @ 10:49AM


Can the Whalers Two-Peat and actually get their first winning streak of the season on the twilight of the regular season?

The Whalers looked pretty solid last week. They brought in some young ringers and took it to the lowly Nordiques 8-7. On the other hand, their defense and goaltending are still suspect, giving up 7 goals in that barn-burner.

This should be a great game, that is...if the Whalers can keep their whits when the Brewers start playing rough.

KP
Response:

G-Men look to make it 22 in a row!

BY: kpark
Mar 22nd, 2011 @ 10:52AM


Hmmm, the G-Men look to finish the regular season with their 22nd loss in a row after loosing opening night against the Tuckeroonies.

Rumor has it that the G-Men will be WITHOUT superstar forwards Matty "The Milkmaid" Marrazzo and Evan "Twinkle Toes" Seeley.

Dead River should be locked and loaded with their full roster at 7pm in West Lebanon.

Gamblers walk away with this one late again.
Response:

BY: Z-Skate
Mar 22nd, 2011 @ 1:27PM



Response:

Please don\'t do write-ups

BY: rgrunds
Mar 23rd, 2011 @ 3:44PM


No one wants to read about Whalers-Nords. No one is interested in the jaw-dropping upset. The intra-squad tension is of no concern to the team or the league...

never mind.
Response:

Please Do...

BY: Grambo
Mar 24th, 2011 @ 11:45AM


I don't know what the deal is with the write-ups and such... I do know that this historic winning streak for the Whalers should not only be posted on this website, but deserves an article in the local papers... Especially after next Tuesday's game when we continue the streak. Has anyone even seen McD since last weeks game against the Whale? Maybe we should track him down to make sure he's okay? Haha
Response:

McD

BY: kpark
Mar 25th, 2011 @ 10:39AM


Yeah McD, and don't do a Player of the Week poll for last week either you lazy shit. Not that I would be nominated for my horrific play, but someone deserves a case of beer.
Response:

To tough to call

BY: jt
Mar 27th, 2011 @ 9:17AM


Look at the season showdown. Dead heat head-to-head. Brewers have 19 goal for and Dead River 21. Only a two goal differential. Should be a close one. One goal either way. 4-3 maybe even OT?! What do you think?
Response:

Predictions

BY: Garrentee
Mar 27th, 2011 @ 9:39AM


I predict I cough the puck up at least two times in my zone and Pattison takes advantage...just a prediction...?
Response:

tough

BY: vtdownhiller
Mar 27th, 2011 @ 12:17PM


As every game in the Uvie it comes down to goaltending...I say Brewer's 6-4. Garren will not cough up the puck but he will hook and try to haul down Pattison at least twice.
Response:

Tough call...

BY: kpark
Mar 28th, 2011 @ 2:20PM


Hmmm, this one could get ugly. Last year, the Brew Crew won the Whalen Cup behind some over the top aggressive and borderline dirty play mixed with a large scoop of offensive talent.

This year, the Brewers will bring that ove the top aggressive play, but seem to be lacking that sweet sugary scoop of offensive talent.

Without me on Defense to turn the puck over, the Brewers stand a chance, but I'm still going to go with Dead River...5-3.
Response:

If you do write ups, I\'ll kill you

BY: rgrunds
Mar 27th, 2011 @ 10:25PM


No. You can\'t do them.
Response:

A previous post ...

BY: Z-Skate
Mar 28th, 2011 @ 10:45AM


If this game comes down to goalies .. I give that edge to Keeny L b/c JT is just a basket case when it comes to pressure. I am saying 5-5 tie and the young Whale forwards prevail in the shoot-out.

Sorry JT. All we really have to do is run you a few times and you will be so far off your game .. the Nords would be better off putting Greg "the bong" in net.

In any event .. I heard Gary was bringing some Doritos for after the game.
Response:

HA HA HA!

BY: kpark
Mar 28th, 2011 @ 2:18PM


Too funny Jay, I'm bringing Doritos now too! Damn, you are right, Turner is a nut-job. But he's made HUGE strides with his therapist in the past 10 days.

After a quick lobotomy tonight, his therapist says that he will be completely focused on stopping the puck tomorrow!

I'm looking forward to this game, and I'm not taking you guys lightly again, last time got me yelled at in the locker room.

KP
Response:

JT. Do you want to read my beer poem

BY: rgrunds
Mar 28th, 2011 @ 4:14PM


beer is so important.

Are you getting some soon......?
Response:

JT as POW Nominee ..

BY: Z-Skate
Mar 29th, 2011 @ 6:33AM


Saying JT had 5 saves in the shoot-out is a little misleading .. 3 of the tuckies missed the net.

If I shoot the puck high and wide (quite common) is that recorded as A) a shot on net, B) a save for the goalie or C) non of the above?

I am guessing the corporate offices of the UVHL - located in the old Saab dealership in WRJ, if anyone is interested - would choose options A & B.

Park, if you blood pressure isn\'t high enough today .. it\'s about to go up .. Liam \"the beast of the eat\" Oliver is showing up for the playoffs. Just to annoy Park, JT & anyone else in a snot green jersey with yellow trim.

For the record - JT played well just didn\'t make 5 saves.
Response:

Little Z

BY: kpark
Mar 29th, 2011 @ 8:20AM


Hey Zanleoni, in a shootout, if a goaltender plays his position so well it forces the shooter to miss the net...it's a save. Checkout nhl.com, you don't have 3 columns for goalies in shootouts (Saves, Goals & Missed The Net).

Big game tonight! Can the Whalers 3-peat in the win column? I am contemplating staying home so that the Nords have a chance to win tonight.

KP
Response:

Executive Offices are IN the SAAB

BY: rgrunds
Mar 29th, 2011 @ 1:07PM


Look for the windowless chassis shell.

Plus, if a goalie manages his position well on a shoot-out, he forces the shooter to miss.

JT has beer.....he's good......
Response:

Official Ruling

BY: 1stPeriod
Mar 29th, 2011 @ 2:46PM


I'm not sure of the UVHL official ruling, but experience tells me that A & B are true. In order to make up for the potential of goaltenders being credited more saves than they actually had to make, they've decided shots off rebounds fall under your category C.

Not that I have any of those to worry about....
Response:

Over / Under?

BY: kpark
Mar 29th, 2011 @ 8:22AM


Wow, McDelicious! 14 fucking goals scored in this one? You are on crack! That 8-7 game was a fluke, this one should be a bit tighter, especially since the Nordiques will be without leading scorer Jordy "McMissedBreakaway" McGee.

KP
Response:

Robbery??

BY: Grambo
Mar 29th, 2011 @ 2:48PM


If I'm not mistaken that was 2 wins in our first 21 games. I know we struggled most of the year, but low-balling us on the win totals is uncalled for. Ha!
Response:

Whale-Nords score reversed?

BY: rgrunds
Mar 30th, 2011 @ 6:42AM


The header and the box score don\'t correspond.

Who won?
Response:

Last night's game.

BY: Grambo
Mar 30th, 2011 @ 7:07AM


Hey McD. You should probably flip-flop those numbers on the score board. I know your boys probably told you that your team won. But I promise you it wasn't even close.
Response:

Oh no...

BY: hkydoc
Mar 30th, 2011 @ 12:07PM


The Whalers upset my boys for their first ever playoff win. I feel horrible, but must congratulate the Whalers for making team history. Good luck the rest of the way, eh.

McD
Response:

Nice job DR

BY: hkydoc
Mar 30th, 2011 @ 12:09PM


Congrats to Dead River for advancing to the semi-finals!

McD
Response:

See you in the scrimmage, Brewers.

BY: hkydoc
Mar 30th, 2011 @ 12:12PM


This isn't the kind of rematch I wanted with the Brewers to end this season... I would have preferred to meet in the Whalen Cup Final again. Regardless, I'm puting up a case of beer for our 2 game series. Lets have some fun to close out this season, eh.

McD
Response:

Whatever

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 31st, 2011 @ 6:58AM


I will congratulate the "WHALERS" that I know as the Whalers, Including LALALALALALAllier, and the rest of the "CORE" team. The team that beat us was a few 18 yr-old snipers, that have no doubt a lot of skill, and outplayed us for at least 2 periods. Kenny stood on his head, and looked like 20-yr-old out there, Zanleoni, fresh off his 2-hr intensive session at Sylvan learning centers, was wicked sharp at defense, and his mass of ass clogged up the slot, preventing any Nord counter-attack. Here's a little tip for ya, don't fucking trash us Jay when you finally have us down by 5, after countless ass-whoopings over the last how many seasons, not one of us (other than Park) have ever lowered ourselves to that kind of B.S. I DID however lose my cool after getting hauled down in front of the net, I felt shame, cooled down in the box, and apologized for acting like a total DICK! My bad..

Overall, good luck to the Whale, and good luck to Kenny...good to see you playing so well!
Response:

Trash talking ..

BY: Z-Skate
Apr 1st, 2011 @ 7:15AM


Marshy, stop being an ass.. I repeated one thing I had said in a pre-game warm-up. If a jovial statement about you being in net is "trash talking" which would imply I had continuously lowered myself to that level of B.S. during the game.. I am really sorry.

On a side note, trash talking is all about getting inside an opponent%u2019s head to get them off their game - it's not meant to be malicious, certainly not in a men%u2019s league.

Wow, I think it worked on ol' Marshy's fragile %u201CEgo%u201D or is it your %u201CId%u201D? Nope can%u2019t be your %u201CId%u201D because you are still a great hockey player deep down inside that part of your mind %u2013 it must have been the %u201Cego%u201D I got to with a little of the perfection driven %u201CSuper-Ego%u201D sprinkled in..

I think or at least I was taught that hockey is a team game so Park's countless banter (trash talk in Greg's world) would be a direct reflection on the Nords as a whole.

For the record, I said one thing with some excitement inbetween and Marshy please don%u2019t hit me.
Response:

Marshy's a Mench

BY: rgrunds
Apr 1st, 2011 @ 12:39PM



Response:

Z...please

BY: The Dark Canuck
Apr 1st, 2011 @ 1:34PM


Im not quite sure what your message said entirely...not sure what happened with all the weird symbols or whatever, but yes, I DO let my emotions get the best of me at times..and I actually THOUGHT I heard u say "are we gonna put any in the net tonight" But if u actually said u thought I might get in between the pipes, NOW THAT would be funny. I would have probably torn a labia or something REAL fast. You guys deserved the win..we sucked. PERIOD. I hope you guys do well, and continue your amazing streak...I really think having you back on D made a big difference...
My prediction..La "Pearl Necklace" scores the game-winner...GO WHALE!
Response:

43-7 is the goal differenical

BY: Z-Skate
Apr 1st, 2011 @ 7:18AM


Does the Whale even have a shot .. maybe if we turn this into a drinking contest - flip cup, anyone?
Response:

K. Lallier is so good

BY: rgrunds
Apr 2nd, 2011 @ 6:38AM


I was just pretending about J.T. Do you need someone to help carry your beer home?
Response:

Whale vs. Gamblers

BY: jt
Apr 2nd, 2011 @ 7:55AM


Jay, you guys have matched up well against the Gamblers. If you can play solid D and Kenny keeps up his outstanding play, your top line can potentially keep up with their top line. As in our loss to you, it comes down to goaltending.

JT
Response:

I want 5th place!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 5th, 2011 @ 8:04AM


I want it SO bad I'm putting a case of beer on the line for the extra motivation and lusting for that sweet amber nectar post-game! Hoo-rah, Nordiques!

McD
Response:

BY: habman
Apr 5th, 2011 @ 10:09AM


I wish I was there to help win that wager. Go Nords! See ya next Tuesday.
Response:

WHAT?!?

BY: kpark
Apr 5th, 2011 @ 1:47PM


Coatesy, where the hell are you going to be?
Response:

BY: habman
Apr 5th, 2011 @ 4:18PM


Training at altitude.
Response:

BY: habman
Apr 6th, 2011 @ 11:45AM


Who won the beer?
Response:

Ridiculous

BY: kpark
Apr 6th, 2011 @ 1:29PM


McD let the refs go. So it ended up just being a scrimmage. Fun, but we all were in the mood for a real game.

Next week will be the real game.

KP
Response:

BY: habman
Apr 6th, 2011 @ 2:14PM


With refs then?
Response:

Big game tonight

BY: hkydoc
Apr 5th, 2011 @ 8:07AM


Congrats to the Whalers on their first playoff win, and first semi-final appearance. No matter what I'll be "free grazing" in their locker room tonight prior to our big 5th place 2 game series against the Brew Crew. Good luck to both teams tonight. May you all have your A-games!

McD
Response:

Good luck, eh!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 5th, 2011 @ 8:09AM


I'm looking forward to watching this match-up from the scorebox! This should be a UVie classic when it is all said and done. Good luck to both teams, and bring your A-games cuz its the playoffs!

McD
Response:

UVHL Canada vs USA rematch?

BY: habman
Apr 6th, 2011 @ 12:59PM



Response:

yup

BY: kpark
Apr 6th, 2011 @ 1:27PM


Should be a fun game.
Response:

How does this game work?

BY: Grambo
Apr 6th, 2011 @ 5:11PM


Are the teams set or is there a picking process?
Response:

Invite only

BY: hkydoc
Apr 7th, 2011 @ 11:46AM


Parky & I select an All-Star team of Americans to face all the Canadians in the league, plus a few select players depending on how many more we need. For example: Ryuji Kikuchi played on the CDN team last year, and so did Allison Malcolm. The US won last year in our first ever game 10-9. It is a blast! E-mails go out very soon to select the squad.

McD
Response:

BY: habman
Apr 7th, 2011 @ 9:53PM


Does it really take All-Stars to have a competitive game with the Canadians?
Response:

Yes!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 8th, 2011 @ 8:16AM


You said it better than I could've!

McD
Response:

Revenge on the US!!!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Apr 8th, 2011 @ 3:05PM


It;ll be a tough task, but CANADA needs to even the score on the 2nd Annual USA/CAN tilt. Team Canada will no doubt get a good pre-game pep talk, and pre-game sodas (as long as it's banned at Campion now). Then, pour on the offense all game long. Who's the goalie for the CANADIANS?
Response:

DO YOU BELIEVE IN MIRACLES!

BY: kpark
Apr 6th, 2011 @ 1:30PM


Holy Shit, Tuck loses to DR and the the Whalers outlast the Gamblers 5-4. Who woulda ever thunk...

(6)Whalers @ (5)Dead River in the finals.

KP
Response:

It's all about the pregame

BY: kirt
Apr 6th, 2011 @ 2:36PM


5th place vs. 6th place for the cup?!

This is an embarrassment to the league that I'm happy to be a part of!

The Whalers have developed a highly-effective pre-game regimen since the games moved to Campion. I'd tell you what it is, but it's a closely held team secret.

KJ
Response:

WRS Golf Tounrament May 18, 2011 at the Q-Club

BY: Z-Skate
Apr 7th, 2011 @ 9:23AM


Boys - the White River School is hosting their annual golf tournament on Suunday May 18, 2011 at the Quechee Club. I have no idea how to attach someting to this thread/post/forum thing .. If you want a flyer to sign-up let me know and I can e-mail it to you.


Response:

It's May 15, 2011 not the 18th

BY: Z-Skate
Apr 7th, 2011 @ 10:00AM



Response:

Fantasy Playoff Draft?

BY: kpark
Apr 7th, 2011 @ 12:16PM


Anyone interested in an NHL playoff Draft?

I\'m a nerd and built a website for my buddies, but decided to open it up. It\'s pretty simple, the leauge I made is for 8 teams. Each team gets to draft 12 players. Most points(goals + assists) wins. After the draft, there is nothing to be done, except to sit back and watch your team lose to mine. We could put a 6 pack on it.

If you\'re interested:

- Go To: http://www.playoffDraft.com
- Create a Manager Account
- Create a New Team
- Join a League (or create your own if you want)
- League: UVHL
- Password: UVHL2011

KP
Response:

Draft

BY: Schlavel
Apr 8th, 2011 @ 9:21AM


Park, It's On Like Donkey Kong....
Response:

Laperle...

BY: kpark
Apr 8th, 2011 @ 9:59AM


Gary, you clearly have no hockey knowledge, so here's a little hint, you CAN'T draft Albert Pujols in the first round.

KP
Response:

IN!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Apr 8th, 2011 @ 3:07PM


And if you want a chance to win a BETTER prize...go to www.cbc.ca/sports/hockey ... and sign up for that pool! Win a brand new Kia!
Response:

Locking the league

BY: kpark
Apr 10th, 2011 @ 9:17PM


Alright, I'm about to lock the league...anyone else want in?
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Apr 9th, 2011 @ 6:19AM


what the fuck just happened, i was only gone for 2 weeks jesus
Response:

I know...

BY: kpark
Apr 11th, 2011 @ 9:23AM


This has officially turned into "Bizarro UVHL". I'm rooting for the Whale, only because it will make me feel better about our horrific loss to them if they win the whole thing.

KP
Response:

Don't you see?

BY: hkydoc
Apr 11th, 2011 @ 11:29AM


We are NOTHING without you, Jordy! We can't even beat the Whalers. Now they're the Cinderella Story of the entire season, maybe even the history of the UVHL, and its ALL YOUR FAULT! Will you grace us with your presence for the 5th Place game tomorrow night?

McD
Response:

Ken Lallier wins Playoff POW for Quarterfinals 3/31

BY: hkydoc
Apr 9th, 2011 @ 4:40PM


Whalers grizzled veteran, goaltender, and GM Ken Lallier won the March 31st POW for his incredible effort in his team\'s FIRST EVER playoff win. \"LeLallier\" had a 3.00 GAA and 28 saves in the #6 Whalers quarterfinal victory over the #3 Nordiques. The Whalers upset the solid Nordiques and earned their first playoff win after 7 years of post-season frustration. CONGRATS! Kenny received 62% of the votes, and has 125 nods in his favor. Runner-up Evan Duggan of the #4 Dead River Oilers received 20% of the votes, and had 40 nods his way for his 2G, 1A victorious night against the #5 Brewers.
Response:

Oops...

BY: hkydoc
Apr 9th, 2011 @ 4:44PM


It was March 29th, eh. Sorry for the confusion.
Response:

MU-HA-HA! MU-HA-HA!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 10th, 2011 @ 7:02PM


5th Place AND the beer are MINE! Mine, I tell you! MU-HA-HA!

McEvil
Response:

Who woulda ever guessed?

BY: Careen
Apr 11th, 2011 @ 9:04AM


Ok, so I get a UVHL update to see how things are going over in Hanover and WHAM! thought my source was screwing with me...the Whalers beat the Gamblers in the playoffs? The Whalers were definitely the top contenders for the Bentley cup - awarded based on best regular attendance. But the Whalen Cup (is that what you guys call it)??!!...I would like to suggest a direct correlation there- perhaps my friends time spent bonding after each defeat (and occasional win)is what led them to this amazing upset???? I would like to think so. I am extending an invitation to all you UVHLers for an end of the season reunion/celebration tomorrow night at Bentley\'s. I will make sure there\'s plenty of Chex mix and wings and even some beer if you\'re thirsty. Either way- good luck to both teams...if I don\'t see you tomorrow, I will look forward to seeing you next year!

Response:

Hey, Careen!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 11th, 2011 @ 11:35AM


Nice to see our #1 hostess is checking in on us and her largest contributors, the Whalers! The Bentleys Cup belongs to the Whalers hands down, without any question. But, do I get a Wing Cup for my disgusting display of post-game gluttony? We'll have to see you another Tuesday night cuz we'll all be at Campion pretty late, probably until you close, so how about a rain check? Check out the write-ups from last week for more insight into the Whalers' post-season success! Thanks for being so good to us on Tuesday nights, Careen!

McD
Response:

Didnt we win...

BY: Garrentee
Apr 11th, 2011 @ 9:37AM


...last week for the beer? Now we gotta embarass you guys a second time?
Response:

I'll honor that request

BY: hkydoc
Apr 11th, 2011 @ 11:26AM


You got it, Garren. I'll bring the case you guys earned by embarassing us in the scrimmage last week, AND I'll put up another 30 pack for the 5th Place game as well. However, it might be a case of oh, so delicious Natty Light.

McD
Response:

Nothing to say?

BY: hkydoc
Apr 11th, 2011 @ 11:36AM


Come on, guys! Not a single word yet? This is still for fun, pride, and bragging rights, eh!

McD
Response:

Nothing w/out Jordy ..

BY: Z-Skate
Apr 11th, 2011 @ 11:37AM


Yes, I have heard McGee is jumping ship to the Whale for the 11-12 season .. He is sick of all the "girly fighting" going on between a boy named Kelly and an odd duck named Turner.
Response:

Funny...

BY: kpark
Apr 11th, 2011 @ 11:58AM


Z, I heard the Whalers have demoted you to defense already this season and have contemplated either trading you to the "B" league for a used blowup doll, or making you Kenny's personal shower luffa.

Either way, you suck, and we locked up Jordy McGee to a long 15 year deal.

KP
Response:

Park out for Tomorrow ..

BY: Z-Skate
Apr 11th, 2011 @ 11:42AM


.. I wonder if ol' KP will let a mysterious "slew foot" from JY in mud league deter his "she-ra" like presence in the game.
Response:

Zzzzzzzz

BY: kpark
Apr 11th, 2011 @ 12:01PM


Settle down Z,
I'm lost, what is a " 'She-ra' like presence?" Regardless, I'm using that horse-shit dirty play to fuel my anger for tomorrow night.

KP
Response:

You know ..

BY: Z-Skate
Apr 11th, 2011 @ 12:53PM


She-ra "Princess of Power" .. I know you have repressed those memories but you were a closet fan.
Response:

HA!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 12th, 2011 @ 9:11AM


Who doesn't remember She-ra? He-man used to bang her like the blow-up doll in the Whalers locker room. How is that pre-game ritual going, boys? There have been no denials of the account posted in the write-up, so it must be true!

Fuel your anger, Park! Channel it towards the Brewers tonight. You know JT will be angry. Me, too! YAAAAAH!

McD
Response:

Anger ...

BY: Z-Skate
Apr 12th, 2011 @ 11:15AM


JT & Park see those orange & red piss-n-fuck butterflies all the time .. Ah pisser JT, I am sorry I can't skate backwards - what the fuck do you mean Park.
Response:

Defense ..

BY: Z-Skate
Apr 11th, 2011 @ 12:52PM


Yes, Whale Corporate (Nicky Hall, Gary "the Pearl" any Kenny) sent me back to D b/c they were sick of watching me in search of A) hockey sense and B) those pretty butterflies in the rafters of Union Arena.

It's hard to decide between the B league and washing Kenny's backside but after watching Kenny in the shower, I will choose ...
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Apr 11th, 2011 @ 2:39PM


Hell yeah i will be there..I think we need to make some serious team changes though..maybe take after the whale and drink BEFORE the game because apparently that is the key to success...My heart says WHALE but i think Dead River is going to take this one 5 -4, sorry Z, ive seen u play defense and well.. your B league material, possibly C...
Greg "1st period" Fiden is going to play out of his mind and thats gonna be the differece..
Ill bring the Zima
Response:

B .. maybe C

BY: Z-Skate
Apr 11th, 2011 @ 2:51PM


I am not sure I would even make the cut playing D in mud league .. You shoud try "Four Loco" .. Works for the Whale, a special thanks to Mark Gattie.
Response:

Brilliant stuff

BY: hkydoc
Apr 12th, 2011 @ 9:07AM


Above average banter going on here, Boys! I love it! Z - I didn't know you liked butterflies, too. My personal favorite is the Upper Valley's own "black flutterpuck" that is often seen coming off Park's stick inching its way towards the goal, wide of course, at an incredibly low speed. It is an incredibly strange species as all of them are female.

McD
Response:

Couple things

BY: stevekenning
Apr 11th, 2011 @ 10:02PM


1) Dead River and the Whale should definitely play in the UV next year. For the whole season. Starting in the fall. Which comes before April.

2) Special treat for the fans on Tuck Seniors Night: Tendy D pairing of Yacey/ Lombard.
Response:

Yah!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 12th, 2011 @ 9:03AM


I love it, Kenning! We're in for a special treat tonight, eh! That was fucking hilarious what you wrote about the Whalers & Dead River.

McD
Response:

Butterflies ..

BY: Z-Skate
Apr 12th, 2011 @ 11:11AM


Hence the name Kelly .. never would have put those two together.

The "black flutter puck" is nice .. However, have you seen the "orange & red piss-fuck"?
Response:

Nuh-uh

BY: hkydoc
Apr 12th, 2011 @ 2:57PM


No, I have not had the pleasure of witnessing the "orange & red piss-fuck". Please describe. Is it another local butterfly?

McD
Response:

Two separate species...

BY: Grambo
Apr 12th, 2011 @ 3:38PM


I believe that these are two separate species of butterflies. If you were at the Semi's last week you definitely saw the Orange Piss-Fuck... There were approximately 12 of them that came out between 8 and 9:30. If you come tonight you should be able to spot the Red ones....
Response:

Grambo .. you're way off ..

BY: Z-Skate
Apr 13th, 2011 @ 12:08PM


I was describing the color of JT & Park's faces when they have lost to the Whale 2x in a 3 weeks span and the comments of pissing & moaning on each other.
Response:

Ride to Team Park VS. Team McDermott game

BY: habman
Apr 17th, 2011 @ 8:46AM


I\'m looking for a ride from the Salt Hill Pub in Leb(not Hanover) to the game tonight. Thanks, Ian
Response:

Gotcha!

BY: kpark
Apr 17th, 2011 @ 1:06PM


Hey Ian, I'll pick you up around 7:30.

KP
Response:

BY: habman
Apr 17th, 2011 @ 2:04PM


Thanks Kelly.
Response:

Summer Hockey?

BY: kpark
Apr 25th, 2011 @ 10:33AM


Hey guys, I\'m putting in a team for the Union Arena \"A/B\" Summer League. 9 games. Season runs from June 19th - July 21st. Cost is $125.

Anyone interested?

KP
Response:

BY: habman
Apr 26th, 2011 @ 5:40AM


I'm interested.
Response:

BY: habman
Apr 26th, 2011 @ 5:40AM


I'm interested.
Response:

interested

BY: rgrunds
May 24th, 2011 @ 9:51AM


Let me know.
Response:

Game 7 Tonight?

BY: kpark
Apr 27th, 2011 @ 8:03AM


Anyone interested in heading to Firestones to watch Game 7? I\'ll be there at 7pm.

KP
Response:

Office Prank...

BY: kpark
May 3rd, 2011 @ 1:04PM


My boss is a die hard Canadiens fan...I am not. Ergo, I had to pull a prank on him when the Bruins beat the Canadiens in 7 games last week...ENJOY!

http://vimeo.com/23220094
Response:

Officfe Prank

BY: MASSHOLE
May 5th, 2011 @ 7:16AM


Kelly that is truly great.
Response:

Game Recaps for the Final Week?

BY: kpark
May 6th, 2011 @ 10:39AM


Hey, McD. Where the f*ck are the game recaps for the final week of the playoffs? Anyone else pissed off here?

GIT \'ER DONE McLazyAss!
Response:

What do you expect?

BY: WHINER
May 6th, 2011 @ 10:48AM


Doesn't really surprise me.

But you expect a write up now?! How the hell is McD going to remember what happened...also, when the 5 and 6 seeds end up playing for the championship everyone tends to lose interest. I'm just glad the Glades Junior C team...I mean the Whalers...didn't win it all.
Response:

Kelly, I\'m bored without hockey...

BY: rgrunds
May 24th, 2011 @ 9:52AM


would you read me a story?
Response:

I hear ya!

BY: kpark
Jun 20th, 2011 @ 1:37PM


Me too. Luckily the summer league just started up down here!
Response:

Season 9...Right Around the Corner!

BY: kpark
Jul 14th, 2011 @ 12:22PM


Captains,
Season 9 is 3 months away so a couple of things you should start to think about:

1. Contact your roster to make sure you have 15 total players on board.
2. 10% discount for early payment on October 1st, so to alleviate the high costs of hockey, you may want to collect half up front now and the other half September. Rumor has it that the pricing from the rink may go down, if so we will pass that along to the players. Currently it is $494 per player for 26 games
3. If you need new Jerseys or Socks, get them ordered now.
4. Get in shape you fatties.

Thanks,
Kelly
Response:

Pre-Season Starts 9/14....get your spot now!

BY: kpark
Aug 9th, 2011 @ 1:50PM


Ladies & Gentlemen, the start of the UVHL season is just 2 months away (early October). We\'ve set up 5 skates and are taking players on a first come, first serve basis. The skates are all 1.5 hours (90 MINUTES!!!) and we\'ll take only 24 skaters...12 a side. All skates are at Campion Rink in West Lebanon, NH. Pay up front and the cost per skate is $12.50, otherwise it is $20 per skate.

The dates are as follows:

Wed 9/14 @ 8:50pm
Sun 9/18 @ 8:10pm
Fri 9/30 @ 8:40pm
Tue 10/4 @ 9:20pm
Sat 10/8 @ 7:40pm

Email me, Kelly, at kpark@parkcreative.com if you are interested.

Thanks,
Kelly & Shawn



Response:

Pre-season predictions?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Aug 25th, 2011 @ 1:20PM


Just to get the banter ball rolling...any predictions for the upcoming UVie season?

1. Will the DR Oilers defend the coveted trophy? 2. Will the Whalers young guns continue to impress? 3. Will the Brewers get so drunk on a regular basis they refer to themselves as \"winning\"? 4. Will the Nordiques finally secure the title that\'s eluded them for FAR too long?5. Will Tuck...well , yes they will suck this year. And finally...6. will the Gamblers continue the trend of blowing their collective loads in the regular season, only to choke on that load in the playoffs? 7...Will Grundy finally break through as a legitimate chance for a W in the UVHL?
Response:

BREAKING NEWS:

BY: kpark
Aug 25th, 2011 @ 1:46PM


Gambler's team captain/manager/water boy/CFO & MVP has just released a press statement regarding the retirement of their goaltending legend Jered "The Condor" Condon.

Condon leaves a legacy behind him with a 40-7-2 record buffered by a remarkable 2.88 Goals Against Average. Saving his best season for last, Condon was 19-1-1 with a 1.95 GAA last season. He goes out on top of the world...oh wait, he never won a cup. He goes out as perhaps the best player the UVHL has ever seen to never win a cup.

Replacing Condon between the pipes for the Gamblers will be Jeremy "The Seed" Seidling. The Seed has big shoes to fill, but his transition should be eased by playing for a solid Gamblers squad.

When asked about his transition from the "B" league to the UVHL, Seidling responded "I've been called up before to fill in, but have never been asked to be a full time starter. When [Will] Meyer called me up, I literally shit myself, then I vomited on my cats before passing out in my own feces and vomit. Then my cats shit and vomited on me as I lay there unconscious." Wise words from a wise man.

Does this hurt the chances for the Gamblers to win their first cup...you tell me.
Response:

lmao

BY: The Dark Canuck
Aug 26th, 2011 @ 4:10PM


Parky, I literally peed a little laughing at that last paragraph...will the recent retirement of J-Con shatter the winning spirit off the G-Men?
Response:

Say it isn't so

BY: jt
Aug 29th, 2011 @ 12:21AM


Jered, Retirement? Are you even 30 yet? I must have fallen off the depth chart. I have to win my spot back on the Nords and I didn't even get a call from Will. I am the back-up to the back-up goalie for the Gamblers after all.
Response:

Kelly you're a supercilious dildo but

BY: rgrunds
Sep 1st, 2011 @ 4:02PM


Condon was excellent. He really enhanced the league.


Response:

YAAAHHH!

BY: hkydoc
Sep 14th, 2011 @ 1:42PM


Thank God hockey is back once again. That is some seriously funny shit posted, boys! Where did Jered go, anyway?

See you on the ice tonight, eh!

McD
Response:

HA!

BY: rgrunds
Sep 1st, 2011 @ 3:59PM


fucker. You'll pay for that.

By the way. Serious Inquiry. Can you get me a price for an entire case of Swai? It's a Viet Namese river fish popular in stores now. The little woman likes it...
What would a case run?

fondling yours,

ES
Response:

Is Dead River ... well, Dead?

BY: Z-Skate
Sep 14th, 2011 @ 4:50PM



Response:

that's a negative

BY: kpark
Sep 15th, 2011 @ 8:10AM


Just heard it from that horse's mouth, Hadley. They are alive and kicking, and just like the rest of the league, need a couple of bodies to fill out their roster.

KP
Response:

BY: ghadley
Sep 15th, 2011 @ 8:58AM


Z get your stories right pal,,,,,,,,, we will be going for 2 in a row..............
Response:

Hadley.....

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 15th, 2011 @ 9:06PM


first of all, where do you get "WE"? I don't believe you attended ANY of the playoff victories..or did you?
Response:

Second...

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 15th, 2011 @ 9:07PM


Grundy and I are neck and neck for FORUM contributions, so I need to BS about something...
Response:

Right

BY: rgrunds
Sep 23rd, 2011 @ 3:02PM


What about my meat prices, Big Boy?

Case of Swai?


Response:

Team Schedules

BY: kpark
Sep 15th, 2011 @ 1:16PM


Hey guys, You can now go to SCHEDULE and download your TEAM and/or LEAGUE schedule directly into your Calendar (.ics) or download a Word Doc.

Check \'er out!

KP
Response:

Google Calendar

BY: McG
Sep 15th, 2011 @ 5:00PM


Awesome.

For G-Cal users:

(1) Save the iCal file to your desktop
(2) Login to G-Cal & click "Add" link on bottom left
(3) Select "Import Calendar"
(4) Find iCal file & choose which G-Cal calendar you want it to go to
(5) Hit "Import"
Response:

Nicely done McG

BY: kpark
Sep 16th, 2011 @ 8:46AM


Thanks for that update McG.
Response:

Awesome!

BY: jt
Oct 3rd, 2011 @ 7:23PM


For goalies who show up late this is critical. Great work Kelly!
Response:

Hockey Music!

BY: hkydoc
Sep 24th, 2011 @ 8:39AM


Players:

Please give us ideas for a new UVHL playlist to add to our already rockin\' game music. Tell us the stuff that gets you goin\', prepares you for a game (but not sexy time), and we\'ll download it to play during game stoppages, warm-up, ice resurfacing, etc. Just make sure it doesn\'t suck, or bring out your feminine side! I\'m 40 years old, and need a music makeover (among other things, eh!).

McD
Response:

Help Needed for the Ibex Tent Sale

BY: kpark
Oct 4th, 2011 @ 12:43PM


Hey guys,
My company, Ibex, is looking for some help this upcoming weekend at our Tent Sale, specifically on Friday morning. We need about people to help out with Parking. We would pay $10 in cash or $12 / hour in product trade.

Let me know if you can help out.

Thanks,
Kelly
Response:

UVHL Waivers

BY: kpark
Oct 14th, 2011 @ 2:24PM


Hey guys,
Just a reminder that you\'ll need to sign both a UVHL & Union Arena Waiver before you can step on the ice. I\'ve gone ahead and built a digital waiver for our end and I think the UA has one as well.

To sign our Digital Waiver, you must log into your My UVHL page, and click the UVHL Waiver in the left hand navigation. This will save you a bunch of time!

Thanks,
Kelly
Response:

profile pic

BY: GamblinWoodie
Oct 16th, 2011 @ 9:00PM


Dude, why can't I upload a profile photo? Nothing happens when I upload a picture, I'm stuck with fucking Kerry Fraser. Wtf.
Response:

Let me look into it....

BY: kpark
Oct 18th, 2011 @ 10:37AM


It's probably because you're not smart. Just kidding. I'll look into it.

KP
Response:

Go Whale!

BY: JTStally
Oct 17th, 2011 @ 6:14PM


I missed the league last year. I'm excited for the season to start...even if I haven't skated since April!
Response:

Welcome Back!

BY: kpark
Oct 18th, 2011 @ 10:07AM


Hey Stally, you're daily input to the UVHL last season was greatly missed. You're sub-par defensive play was not missed!

See you tonight,
KP
Response:

Whalers!

BY: kpark
Oct 18th, 2011 @ 10:08AM


I'm going with the Whalers tonight...5-4.

Don't forget to make your Picks! Winner at the end of the season gets $100 Gift Card to Hockey Monkey or Stateline Sports!

KP
Response:

Meyer

BY: kpark
Oct 18th, 2011 @ 10:43AM


This is the hit I'm going to put on Willy Meyer tonight! It's going to be GLORIOUS!


Response:

Goaltending will Prevail

BY: rgrunds
Oct 18th, 2011 @ 11:46AM


Feiden will win it. Tuck will miss Yacey.

Normal Hawaiians just don't belong in the net. Even as backups.

Be Normal.
Response:

Who will be there?

BY: hkydoc
Oct 18th, 2011 @ 3:11PM


That will determine who gets the win on Opening Night of Season IV. Will Tuck shine? Will Dead River be discombobulated? Good Luck to both teams, and have a good game.

See you on the ice!

McD
Response:

Methinks...

BY: hkydoc
Oct 18th, 2011 @ 3:13PM


...this game is a toss-up. Or a toss-fest post-game in the locker rooms & showers. Wait... Bayley graduated, so it will just be in the showers instead of a full frontal locker room bench voyeur show...

See you on the ice!

McD
Response:

Gamblers will start 0-1

BY: hkydoc
Oct 18th, 2011 @ 3:15PM


Lets get the season off right, Nords! The Gamblers will go to Bentley's crying in their post-game beer & wings. Wait... they never show up at Bentley's, so they'll just cry in the locker room.

GO NORDS!

See you on the ice!

McD
Response:

I eat my words... well, some of them at least.

BY: hkydoc
Oct 19th, 2011 @ 2:05AM


You guys were goooooood tonight, and I tip my hat to a superior opponent that played hard, clean, and made me work. Not too often Parky & I give up two goals in a shift. Twice.

However, you guys are so lame for being a no-show at Bentley's post-game. C'mon, Man!

Nice game, eh.

McD
Response:

Nordiques Lose by Factor of 4

BY: rgrunds
Oct 19th, 2011 @ 11:18PM


Auspicious beginning.

Not Turner\'s fault. He\'s a goalie. He\'s good and sometimes has beer.
Response:

It was fugly

BY: kpark
Oct 21st, 2011 @ 9:02AM


...but the Nordiques will bounce back.
Response:

Agreed

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 23rd, 2011 @ 1:57PM


I could not seem to gt anything going either, and our team looked like a Mite tryout team chasing around the New York Islanders. We DID have flashes of chemistry, but it'll take a few games to get comfortable playing with one another again. Maybe the guys that haven't played ONE SINGLE PRE-SEASON SKATE, outta get some fucking practice! See you boys on Tues.!
Response:

Marshy's fault

BY: hkydoc
Oct 23rd, 2011 @ 11:33PM


Yeah - Marshy was minus 4 on Tuesday night and plus 4 on Thursday morning ripping shots past McD trying to defend him, & past Turner and Lallier who could barely see the whistling puck. Way to save your A-game for Tuesday night, bro!

McD
Response:

PreSeason MVP Candidates

BY: SquatnPuke
Oct 21st, 2011 @ 2:09PM


Alright Gents

Welcome back for another great season of UVHL Hockey. I\'m going to cut through most of the bullshit here and just come out and say it. While most of you sonsofbitches were down on the Wiers chasing skirt and sipping those fruity drinks with swords and cherries in em, my man Josh Noble Cherney was out there squatin like a maniac, puking his guts out and generally getting ready to turn each and everyone of you guys into creamed cheese this season. Picture a combination of Adam Banks and Marty McSorley. I\'m calling it now. J noble Cherney, MVP of the UVHL this season. Tuck over the Gamblers 5-4 in the finals, Cherney 3 and 2.
Response:

RiDICKulous

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 22nd, 2011 @ 1:39PM


you and your man crush, should likely be sipping a milkshake through two straws, gazing upon each other, and you compliment him over and over, with the hopes of spooning him in a post-game afterglow. I bet you guys even have t-shirts made up "Besties for life". We play Tuck next Tues. Maybe you'll be there in the stands cheering on "your man"
Response:

HA! Shake with 2 straws.....

BY: rgrunds
Oct 23rd, 2011 @ 11:32AM


Oh Marshie, sometimes I could stick my meat right in your ear.

Good one.

I'm still 2 posts ahead of you.
Response:

Ahhh Grundle

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 23rd, 2011 @ 1:58PM


Im still like 22 goals in front of you, with no robberies to date. Chin up ol'chap...
Response:

Love it!

BY: kpark
Oct 24th, 2011 @ 1:55PM


Although I believe that Cherney had a RIGOROUS off-season workout regimen, I also know that our stud defenseman Shawn "McBuffaloWings" McDermott has been working out in his own way. Shawn has upped his personal best of 5 dozen buffalo wings in one night to 10 and has now set his sights on Cherney for tomorrow night's game.

McDiesel's simple game plan is to fall on top of Cherney every time he enters our zone.

I'll put my money on McTitanic.

Go Nords!
Response:

Hahahahaha!

BY: hkydoc
Oct 25th, 2011 @ 5:59PM


Fucking HILARIOUS, Park! Yours, too, Marshy.

McD
Response:

Oh My

BY: rgrunds
Oct 26th, 2011 @ 10:24AM


you keep getting funnier.

What happened? Did you meet an editor, or something?
Response:

Men and boys...

BY: stu1848
Oct 24th, 2011 @ 8:56AM


Let's hope we have more than six for the game. I don't think we can take another gut-wrenching 60 minutes of ice-time. Then again, who cares...we're playing hockey!
Response:

Nords BOUNCE BACK!

BY: kpark
Oct 24th, 2011 @ 10:28AM


I'm expecting the Nordiques to clearly bounce back after the summer rust was harshly removed by a very abrasive tool last week: 11-3 shellacking by the Gamblers.

Apparently we need to keep an eye out for the "Wicked Smaaaht Kid Line" of Cherney, Walsh & Seeley.

A very interesting storyline here, that Ryan "The Govenatore" Faces his old team for the first time...I think he'll be a plus 4 with a goal and two helpers.

KP
Response:

Bummer :(

BY: JTStally
Oct 24th, 2011 @ 10:39AM


Too bad we let this one get away, but it was an even game and the Whale doesn't usually get a point in the opener, so that's a silver lining!
Response:

My pick

BY: JTStally
Oct 24th, 2011 @ 10:40AM


I'm taking the Whalers...of course :)
Response:

Lost :(

BY: JTStally
Oct 31st, 2011 @ 1:01PM


Well, we were there for about half the game but couldn't keep up down the stretch. Oh well, we actually did better than the Nords the week before, so we aren't the only team to get whipped early by the 'Blers, haha!
Response:

Gameday like a raptor riding a shark

BY: McG
Oct 25th, 2011 @ 9:53AM



Response:

LOVE IT

BY: kpark
Oct 26th, 2011 @ 2:07PM


McG, this picture drove the Nordiques to a dominant win last night! I laughed my ass off when I saw it yesterday, was trying to think of something clever to live up to the picture...fell short and did nothing. This photo inspired me to take 30 shots on net, miss the net with 18 of them and hit the goalie in the chest 12.
Response:

Gamblers TOUGH

BY: hkydoc
Oct 25th, 2011 @ 5:53PM


They were a force last week. Lets hope they don't improve their team game tonight, otherwise the Whale will be overwhelmed.

Good luck to both teams, and have fun out there, eh!

McD
Response:

Should be a good one

BY: hkydoc
Oct 25th, 2011 @ 5:56PM


Both teams are looking to find themselves early on, and both have some roster variability early in the season. It could be pretty close if DR has 9 or more skaters.

Like Stu says - we're playing hockey! And we can have beer at Bentley's afterwards!

McD
Response:

Tuck will drown...

BY: hkydoc
Oct 25th, 2011 @ 5:57PM


...in the stifling defense the Nords will smother them with!
YAAAHHH! Nords 7-1, baby!

McD
Response:

Tuck loses by factor of FIVE

BY: rgrunds
Oct 26th, 2011 @ 11:14AM


Soon the league\'s going to need scientific notation. Exponents.

Is Tuck spending too much time pressing their Ascots?

Where\'s Yacey when they need him?
Response:

nuts

BY: kpark
Oct 31st, 2011 @ 12:56PM


Grundo, you are nuts. I have zero understanding of what you are talking about...about 95% of the time.
Response:

Well

BY: rgrunds
Oct 31st, 2011 @ 8:36PM


start with the literacy requirement. And, talk to Feiden. He'll help you. He's a good goalie and a good guy. He'll help you with counting and digits and stuff.
Response:

Third Line?

BY: GamblinWoodie
Oct 31st, 2011 @ 3:21PM


I don't think we even have one of those. Who needs a third line when you own the fountain of youth?
Response:

Really...

BY: 1stPeriod
Oct 31st, 2011 @ 5:44PM


"Dead River is still trying to find out who they are. With a large core of their team retired due to a deadly case of "Sissyitis", they have pulled in any available players to fill their roster."

We really will take anyone. Some might say we're desperate, but I just like to think we are investing in our future by taking everyone and selecting the creme-de-la-creme from there.
Response:

Jesus loves your gameday mullet trophies

BY: McG
Nov 1st, 2011 @ 9:18AM



Response:

Where do you find this shit?

BY: kpark
Nov 1st, 2011 @ 11:19AM


Love it, but I want to know where the hell you find it?
Response:

That's nice

BY: rgrunds
Nov 1st, 2011 @ 3:47PM


I feel better now. Less alone.

Don't you have to go and press your Ascot for the game?


Response:

Tough night

BY: stu1848
Nov 1st, 2011 @ 11:02AM


Well...it doesn't look good, but we will certainly show up and barring any unlucky incidents we will play all three periods. The question remains, will we battle for three periods. My vote is to play the ol' 4-1 trap. Game-plan: Prevent shots, get a few lucky breaks, and eat a live chicken before the game!
Response:

POW Open

BY: kpark
Nov 1st, 2011 @ 11:20AM


Hey guys, I forgot to set the POW voting from Draft Status to Open. POW voting will be open until Thursday, November 3rd for last week\'s games.

Make sure to vote!
Response:

POW Voting

BY: JTStally
Nov 2nd, 2011 @ 4:29PM


Since we didn't get a horse in the race, I'm voting for Meyer. I missed this week's game still recovering from the sunburn he gave me from lighting that red lamp behind our goal so often!
Response:

Die, Brewers!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 1st, 2011 @ 4:50PM


YAAAAAHH! I'm on a career-high 2-game point streak, am plus-1 on the season, and I feel lucky tonight!

McD
Response:

No, you don't...

BY: hkydoc
Nov 1st, 2011 @ 4:51PM


...but you do have a third ball.

McD
Response:

Post-game is more important

BY: hkydoc
Nov 1st, 2011 @ 4:53PM


Regardless of what happens on the ice, showing up post-game at the bar cures all ills, and acute cases of "sissytits", too!

McD
Response:

Lineup Change

BY: JTStally
Nov 1st, 2011 @ 6:25PM


I won't be able to make this one tonight. My game play isn't conducive to cracking the 1-4 anyway, but I'm hoping my spot will be filled by a power forward that can get some quality opportunities on Greg.
Response:

C\'mon Smegma...

BY: rgrunds
Nov 2nd, 2011 @ 5:10PM


aka Kelly.

Scores please?
Response:

Lombard to Net

BY: rgrunds
Nov 3rd, 2011 @ 1:27PM


Lombard. Lombard. Lombard.


Response:

DR score? Smegma....

BY: rgrunds
Nov 4th, 2011 @ 10:44AM


Do your subnormal best.
Response:

Better be Nice to Feiden

BY: rgrunds
Nov 4th, 2011 @ 6:22PM


otherwise he won't play with you anymore.

He's a really good goalie and No One in the league can model the Weak Force as well as he can.



Response:

Big Joe!

BY: JTStally
Nov 4th, 2011 @ 2:44PM


It took him until the third to score!? That's a drought for Gaudet. He must have been knocking the rust off!

Atta boy, Joe. Shades of a Hanover High third periods in the early-to-mid 2000s. Love it!
Response:

Good Game

BY: JTStally
Nov 7th, 2011 @ 11:37AM


I was excited to see how this one turned out (not that cared who won, aside from being right in Pick 'Em). With our opening week loss in a shootout to the Brew Crew and this one going to a shootout, it looks like we have several even teams this year!
Response:

Hadley!

BY: kpark
Nov 8th, 2011 @ 7:39AM


I'm amazed that Hadley is leading his team in points...apparently that Power Forward with no backchecking and offensive ability needs to be shadowed tonight. I'm going to be all over him like a fly on shit.

Nords win this one...9-2.
Response:

Kenny!

BY: JTStally
Nov 8th, 2011 @ 9:39AM


He'll definitely show up tonight. We're ready to go get another W for the Whale!
Response:

Offensive Prowess

BY: JTStally
Nov 8th, 2011 @ 9:45AM


Jordy's absence shouldn't hurt too badly. Don't forget that his Nords team has an offensive powerhouse in the form of Kelly "Visor-less Crosby" Park.
Response:

Epic gameday staredown

BY: McG
Nov 8th, 2011 @ 10:38AM








Response:

GIF!

BY: GamblinWoodie
Nov 8th, 2011 @ 2:45PM


Dude, can you GIF the moment this dude get's destroyed?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S2oymHHyV1M
Response:

Your cat is fat

BY: rgrunds
Nov 9th, 2011 @ 2:22PM


It's fat..really fat......so fat.

Response:

Defense

BY: 1stPeriod
Nov 8th, 2011 @ 11:11AM


While Park is off rubbing up on Hadley, I expect a few DR players to sneak into the zone and put JT to the test.

And with the return of an actual defenseman tonight, DR might actually put forth a solid defensive effort, allowing the offensive talent to shine.

On that note - Park will either a) ring a puck off the crossbar, top blocker for the prettiest goal of the year, or b) give the protective netting a good workout.
Response:

1stPeriod!

BY: kpark
Nov 8th, 2011 @ 2:39PM


Feiden, I am going to say that my statline tonight...in our 8-3 win will be:

3 shots off the end boards
2 shots right into your belly
2 PIMs
1 trip over the blue line
1 fight with Hadley
Response:

Over / Under

BY: GamblinWoodie
Nov 8th, 2011 @ 11:48AM


Definitely taking the under on this one. But the more interesting prop bets...

Over / Under on Park shots ending up in the netting: 5

Over / Under on new puck marks on JT's RBK's: 3

Probability the MMA line outscores this entire game: High
Response:

Hmmm...

BY: kpark
Nov 8th, 2011 @ 2:41PM


I like these new prop bets...

Over / Under on Park shots ending up in the netting: 5
Under, I can't actually lift the puck into the netting

Over / Under on new puck marks on JT's RBK's: 3
Over, I'm going to say 8

Probability the MMA line outscores this entire game: High
Under, this isn't a good matchup for them
Response:

Parity! Where\'s Pete Rozelle when you need him?

BY: rgrunds
Nov 9th, 2011 @ 9:08AM


1 on the bench for DR? Gamblers win by factor of 12?

Risk to the league if 2-3 teams don\'t have a chance?
Response:

On a limb

BY: 1stPeriod
Nov 14th, 2011 @ 6:46PM


I'm going to go out on a limb and predict the Gamblers steam-roll the short-benched Oilers. The bigger question is how long it will take the Gamblers to break this one wide open.

Either way, DR has a beer or three to look forward to after all is said and done!
Response:

No faith?

BY: kpark
Nov 14th, 2011 @ 10:34PM


Feiden...you should say that you are going to make 92 saves for the 1-0 win. On the other hand....I did predict a 12-1 win for the G-Men. I really think that the pre-game writeup for this game might be my finest work.

KP
Response:

Amen!

BY: voyer
Nov 14th, 2011 @ 11:08PM


Yes, that write up says it like it is. Honest Journalism. refreshing.......
Response:

There is no god!

BY: stu1848
Nov 15th, 2011 @ 10:24AM


But we get 12-1? I guess I should be pleased you think we can put one past the opposing goalie.

That's the kind of optimism we need!
Response:

Prize winning?

BY: 1stPeriod
Nov 15th, 2011 @ 10:44AM


Yes, I do believe it deserves a Pulitzer.
Response:

Also, on a limb.

BY: GamblinWoodie
Nov 14th, 2011 @ 7:07PM


I'm going to predict that you see more shots this game than I've seen all season.

Want to trade nets half way through?
Response:

Nords by 2...

BY: Z-Skate
Nov 15th, 2011 @ 8:44AM


I think the Whale breaks the 3 game winning streak tonight and McD will be so pissed he may even revert back to wings instead of his veggie / chicken plate.
Response:

Gameday - SAVE A PRETZEL FOR THE GAS JETS!

BY: McG
Nov 15th, 2011 @ 9:52AM



Response:

Brilliant!

BY: kpark
Nov 16th, 2011 @ 9:45AM


Holy shit that was fucking amazing. At first I didn't really understand what was going on, the Lip Syncing was so spot on that I thought Perry was joking around.

Nicely done McG, Nicely Done!
Response:

Let's be serious

BY: stu1848
Nov 15th, 2011 @ 10:18AM


Ok...I'm hoping to walk away healthy tonight...be gentle!


Response:

Whalers Goal Total

BY: JTStally
Nov 15th, 2011 @ 10:35AM


How does the Whalers goal total go down if McGee is present!? Is it really going to have that much impact on Parky taking fewer reckless chances to try to relieve long lost glory?
Response:

Ready to go!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 15th, 2011 @ 11:26AM


Look out, Fellas - Kirt Johnson is READY for tonight. He had a Hatty in morning hockey, and said he woke up just knowing it was gonna be a great day. How did he know? Well, you'll have to ask him! Aaaah... methinks if we could all wake up that happy every morning there would be no war.

As far as the post-game wings go tonight, McD has turned over a new plate... of grilled chicken & veggies... but I'll still tongue-fuck the shit out of the Buffalo sauce and the vat of bleu cheese I get on the side! Baby steps...

See you fuckers on the ice tonight! YAAAAHHH! GO, NORDS!!!

McD
Response:

WTF? Where's the Tuck?

BY: hkydoc
Nov 15th, 2011 @ 11:28AM


Come on, guys! You are in SCHOOL for fuck's sake, so where is the pre-game banter while you're not paying attention to class? Get your UVHL on, eh!

McD
Response:

That's the right attitude, Oilers!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 15th, 2011 @ 11:36AM


Feiden and Stu have got it right - have fun tonight no matter what the score is, and there are beers and chicken & veggie plates (okay, buffalo wings, too) waiting for you at Bentley's post-game, eh!

Feiden may be the first 100 shot recipient tonight, and my vote is with Stu to score the only Oilers goal, unless the Golden (shower) Child makes his second guest appearance of the season cuz he'll run right over and through Seidling carrying the puck right to the mesh.

You guys should have some subs tonight, too. so if you have 9 or 10 the blowout won't be nearly as exhausting.

As far as the G-men go, nobody has to apologize for being good, or dominant in the UVHL. That is why we are the A-league, and not the B-league. Everyone has to step up and improve their team game to compete with the current # 1 squad. All I'd like to see (hear actually) is less bitching from a team that is winning. Shut the fuck up, JY! You are worse than Park.
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Nov 15th, 2011 @ 12:06PM


The only close thing about this game is going to be Z and Gary in the shower post-game
Response:

BY: Z-Skate
Nov 15th, 2011 @ 12:17PM


Gary is in DC and I have been in a "funk" all week since his departure...
Response:

HA HA HA!

BY: kpark
Nov 15th, 2011 @ 12:25PM


Good call Jordy. Sorry to hear about the funk you're in, Z. Regardless of the outcome, this is always a good clean game...I'm looking forward to it.
Response:

Clean .. What?

BY: Z-Skate
Nov 15th, 2011 @ 12:30PM


We have an over / under on how quickly I can get in JT's basket?

Has "boarding" ever been called in warm-ups?
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Nov 15th, 2011 @ 12:09PM


If Garren's hockey game is anything like his golf game then Tuck should take this one easy.
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Nov 15th, 2011 @ 12:12PM


Gamblers players aren't happy unless they post atleast 20 points a game - Greg stops 60 shots tonight but still gives up atleast 12
Response:

Feiden found with head in oven

BY: rgrunds
Nov 16th, 2011 @ 7:16AM


Note referred to \"that little troll Meyer\" and unexpected swarms of angry black objects.

He was a good guy. Best on his team for mathematical models of subatomic events.

He Died Too Young.


Response:

Bastards

BY: 1stPeriod
Nov 16th, 2011 @ 12:03PM


Turns out modern medical science is more advanced than I anticipated. They were able to revive me in a couple hours. I shall live to suffer through another DR loss.

Unfortunately, no one told the press, so the obituary was printed.
Response:

JT's Head

BY: JTStally
Nov 16th, 2011 @ 10:25AM


We didn't see JT at Bentley's and assumed he had gone home with a headache. That's what happens when you stand on it all night, buddy! Haha.

It was a good game. I wish we could of found the net with a few more shots, but that was some solid goaltending for the Nords. We'll get 'em next time!
Response:

Victory

BY: 1stPeriod
Nov 16th, 2011 @ 11:57AM


Dr (and company) proves the critics wrong and holds the Gamblers to single digits. My therapist says that's a victory.
Response:

alive

BY: rgrunds
Nov 16th, 2011 @ 12:41PM


I heard you were dead.


Response:

Seriously? No POW nod for Turner?

BY: hkydoc
Nov 17th, 2011 @ 11:24PM


Are you serious, Park? JT was the BEST player in the UVHL last Tuesday night, and I think looking beyond the stats is warranted here. With all due respect to Seidling, that is a team statistic thus far for the Gamblers, and a shutout on a dozen weak shots pales in comparison to Turner keeping the Nords in the game against the improved Whalers. Tazzy has been playing VERY well, but then again a 9-2 win over a Tuck squad that got DOMINATED by the Brewers is also more of a team stat, and Turner outshone everyone this past Tuesday. Just my two cents...

McD
Response:

Truth

BY: GamblinWoodie
Nov 18th, 2011 @ 8:02AM


I didn't really do anything Tuesday night, actually, to make things a little more challenging I was all hopped up on Nyquil, blindfolded and wearing my skates on the wrong feet.

Here's the deal, a vote for me is a vote for JT and Feiden. I'll split the beer 50/50 between them.

Vote for a GOALIE!
Response:

McD...

BY: Z-Skate
Nov 18th, 2011 @ 8:48AM


Ever thought Park just doesn't like Turner...?

JT's new diet of a "cock-n-balls" must be working!? It was his best game I have seen... I think, we win if average Johnny shows up.
Response:

Ha. Special Diet.....

BY: rgrunds
Nov 18th, 2011 @ 3:06PM


JT swallows......
Response:

Feiden to miss the rest of the season...

BY: Z-Skate
Nov 18th, 2011 @ 8:49AM


http://www.usatoday.com/news/washington/story/2011-11-17/obama-assassination-attempt/51271096/1

Response:

Ha Ha Ha!

BY: kpark
Nov 20th, 2011 @ 9:43PM


Too funny. I always knew that Feiden was a little bit off.
Response:

Osama Bin Feiden

BY: rgrunds
Nov 21st, 2011 @ 2:06PM


Now It All Makes Sense.

Ever wonder why he wears a mask?


'mild mannered physicist knocks down Twin Towers....."
Response:

BY: klazar327
Nov 18th, 2011 @ 11:25AM


Mancuso had the Hat Trick, not Fletcher
Response:

Osama

BY: rgrunds
Nov 21st, 2011 @ 7:01PM


When bin Feiden makes a good save, he starts ululating. It's very unexpected.

Was signed to the Gulf State league for a bonus of yogurt and a prayer rug.
Response:

Good news.

BY: 1stPeriod
Nov 21st, 2011 @ 11:43PM


My parole officer says I'm good for the game, should be back in town before the 1st period. If not, a trash can will likely put up just as good of numbers. However, in the case that I actually make a glove save, I will try to keep my ululating under control. I apologize before hand for any outbreaks.
Response:

Have you seen my gameday shoes?

BY: McG
Nov 22nd, 2011 @ 10:19AM



Response:

tsk tsk

BY: rgrunds
Nov 23rd, 2011 @ 3:11PM


Your parents paid for an expensive education so you could re-post canned gags?

Turn in your Ascot Cholmondley, you're out of the club.




Response:

The Best Penatly Kill...

BY: JTStally
Nov 22nd, 2011 @ 10:39AM


is no penalty kill!

Looking back at the glory days, Gaudet used to play on a power play unit that went almost 50% one season! Us Whalers are a little different, we could be featured in a power play instructional video (on what NOT to do), but we're making progress in all facets. The Brewers average more than 10 PIMs per game. They'll need to cut that down to win this one.

These two teams are evenly matched. If the Brew Crew ends up in the box too much and the Whale can manage a couple on the PP, that'll be a difference maker.
Response:

Stat line

BY: kpark
Nov 22nd, 2011 @ 10:51AM


The injury report for the Nordiques has been released, and two key components for the Nordiques machine will be out. Jordy McGee & Tommy Dakai have missed the morning skate and will not be playing tonight due to a serious case of vaginitis that they contracted together. Their vaginitis was contracted by scheduling to be out of town on a week we play the Gamblers...good luck to you two, and I hope there is a remedy that will cure your dignity.

With that being said, the Nordiques are now 7 goal underdogs.
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Nov 22nd, 2011 @ 12:53PM


Vaginitis isn't something u schedule Kelly, it just happens
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Nov 22nd, 2011 @ 12:53PM


Vaginitis isn't something u schedule Kelly, it just happens
Response:

Osama bin Feiden contract update

BY: rgrunds
Nov 24th, 2011 @ 6:07AM


Recently purchased by Qatar. Sheikh Al-Arf saw him in practice and thought he was \"pretty\". Also mentioned that he was tired of camels and was sure bin Feiden \"would look nice in my tent\".

Gee, good luck Greg. Is this what you had in mind when you entered Dartmouth? A whole new persona....and more?
Response:

No Zwald POW It would not be normal

BY: rgrunds
Nov 27th, 2011 @ 2:53PM


Hawaiians cannot be goalies. It is not normal. We should all be normal.

It is important to be a normal Hawaiian.

This is really upsetting.

Response:

Wierdo

BY: kpark
Nov 28th, 2011 @ 2:21PM


Grundy...you are the weirdest human being on the planet.
Response:

There are many things you don't understand

BY: rgrunds
Nov 30th, 2011 @ 8:00AM


and they are all essential.

I think you should seek help for your leg pad fetish. Don't they get in the way?
Response:

Need 2 players

BY: kpark
Nov 28th, 2011 @ 2:19PM


Hey guys, the Tuckies are looking for two bodies to help fill out their roster tomorrow night against the Nordiques.

Any takers?

KP
Response:

Skaters for Tuck!

BY: kpark
Nov 28th, 2011 @ 2:22PM


Hey guys, the Tuckies need a body or two for the early game against the Nordiques. If you\'re interested let me know.

Thanks,
Kelly
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Nov 29th, 2011 @ 1:30PM


Tuck might have a player from the B league joining them tonight, B league but good player, he told me last night he might show up but heard that before, played for middlebury
Response:

Full Bench

BY: JTStally
Nov 29th, 2011 @ 10:08AM


We're not sorry for bringing a full bench each night and we're not sorry for starting a youth movement. That said, all us pre-paternal players will need to bring our best game if we plan to slow down Marrazzo and Co., but we've done that before!
Response:

Slowed Down...

BY: kpark
Nov 29th, 2011 @ 1:27PM


Yes, you have slowed them down, but haven't stopped them. Good luck to the Whalers tonight, I think this will be a great game and all comes down to Lallier.
Response:

Don't Underestimate the Defense

BY: JTStally
Nov 30th, 2011 @ 8:22AM


The MMA line gets a lot of fair credit, but don't underestimate the defense or the goaltending of Seidling for the Gamblers. The D really trapped us in our own end early (winning that battle three feet from the blue) and once we did start to gain the edge in the third, Seidling and the blue-liners stood strong in front of their net. That glove that came out of nowhere on Gaudet with six minutes left in a two-goal game was crazy!
Response:

bin Feiden waives no trade clause

BY: rgrunds
Nov 30th, 2011 @ 9:45AM


Will pay to play for Vanuatu...."just get me some defense...forwards too"......
Response:

score sheet

BY: klazar327
Nov 30th, 2011 @ 10:09AM


Lazarczyk scored the go ahead goal , Mancuso didn't score
Response:

BY: klazar327
Nov 30th, 2011 @ 10:35AM


You can't deprive me of my hard work goal, first game winner since mites

Response:

Another arrest linked to UVHL

BY: 1stPeriod
Dec 1st, 2011 @ 12:35AM


They finally caught Grundy. We all knew this was bound to happen.

http://crave.cnet.co.uk/gadgets/man-arrested-at-large-hadron-collider-claims-hes-from-the-future-49305387/


Response:

I couldn't help it

BY: rgrunds
Dec 1st, 2011 @ 9:25AM


I love all those little particles. I wanted to possess them all and take them back with me to the planet Rek-tom.

It was my duty to future citizens.
Response:

Blame it on Higgs boson

BY: rgrunds
Dec 2nd, 2011 @ 5:12AM


Police said Mr Grundstein, who was wearing a bow tie and rather too much tweed for his age, would not reveal his country of origin. "Countries do not exist where I am from. The discovery of the Higgs boson led to limitless power, the elimination of poverty and Kit-Kats for everyone. It is a communist chocolate hellhole and I'm here to stop it ever happening."
Response:

Kit-Kat

BY: 1stPeriod
Dec 2nd, 2011 @ 11:22AM


Still waiting for my Kit-Kat.
Response:

waiting for Godot

BY: rgrunds
Dec 3rd, 2011 @ 9:28AM


You'll get your Kit-Kat AFTER you get some defense. Which means about the time you are awarded a Chair in physics some 40 years hence.
Response:

waiting for Godot

BY: rgrunds
Dec 3rd, 2011 @ 9:28AM


You'll get your Kit-Kat AFTER you get some defense. Which means about the time you are awarded a Chair in physics some 40 years hence.
Response:

Kurt Zwald wins the UVHL\'s Nov. 22nd Long Trail Player of the Week

BY: hkydoc
Dec 3rd, 2011 @ 10:48PM


Tuck goaltender Kurt Zwald turned away 26 shots and allowed only 1 goal against in his team\'s 4-1 win over the Dead River Oilers on 11/22. Zwald received 67 of 156 votes for a total of 46%. Runner up was Will Meyer, Gamblers captain, for his 2G, 1A performance in a 5-2 win over the Nordiques with 47 votes and 30% of the total.

Enjoy the Long Trail, Kurt!
Response:

Things Changed

BY: rgrunds
Dec 4th, 2011 @ 7:21AM


I have recalculated and Hawaiian goaltenders ARE within statistical parameters of normal. Everything is OK now.

Can I try your beer?

Cowabunga, Dude.
Response:

The mysterious Hawaiian goalie appears

BY: 808hky
Dec 5th, 2011 @ 8:06PM


It still might be a stretch to call me normal, but a case of beer is is a universally good motivator. Thanks guys!
Response:

DR losses Bin Feiden\'s fault

BY: rgrunds
Dec 5th, 2011 @ 12:22PM


if he\'d score once in a while, maybe his team would have a chance.

yeah.

Step it up, big boy.
Response:

Season 9 is right around the corner....

BY: JTStally
Dec 5th, 2011 @ 1:11PM


Is that true?

Is it too much to ask for a new poll every once in a while? Haha!

Here\'s one: how often do you reasonably expect Parky to update the site\'s poll?

- Every day because I\'m on the site THAT much!
- Once a week
- Once a month
- At least a few times a season shouldn\'t be too much ask.
- Never. Keep it the way it is now, because I\'m afraid of change.
Response:

Premier player!

BY: JTStally
Dec 6th, 2011 @ 4:08PM


All world, baby, that's me! Next stop: NHL! :)

Btw, if you hadn't realized I was playing this year, you're not the kind of person to frequent this site, so don't even pretend to go for that response. Haha!
Response:

Ha Ha Ha!

BY: kpark
Dec 6th, 2011 @ 4:26PM


Is that a good update to the site OR WHAT?!?!? You asked for it Stally.
Response:

My Request

BY: JTStally
Dec 7th, 2011 @ 5:07PM


Hey! You know what? I asked that the poll be updated and it was, so who would I be to complain? Haha!
Response:

Elephant in the Parlor

BY: rgrunds
Dec 6th, 2011 @ 8:27AM


Like I said....if Bin Feiden would score once in a while or even set up a shooter, this team would turn on a dime.

You just Don't Work With Terrorists.


Response:

Three Periods Needed

BY: JTStally
Dec 6th, 2011 @ 8:32AM


I can't believe this Dead River team is 0-7-0. I mean, they aren't usually at the top of the standings, but they're usually in most games. I'd hate to give them their first win, but expect they'll bring it.

You never know when Feiden might stand on his head for the whole game. The key for us will probably be getting to "1st Period" during the second and third, like we did in the last meeting. If we can't, he could steal this one, especially if DR brings a full bench.
Response:

Feiden Out

BY: GamblinWoodie
Dec 6th, 2011 @ 9:08AM


Official response from the Feiden camp is that he's geeking out at a science conference in CA, however multiple unconfirmed rumors are swirling that he's receiving zen buddhist training at an undisclosed location in Northern Saskatchewan.

I'll be filling in for the night, likely nullifying any chance they had at putting a 1 in the win column.
Response:

Taking the Over

BY: JTStally
Dec 6th, 2011 @ 9:12AM


Well then, let me put $5 down on the Whalers giving 4 and $10 on Over 6 goals before Parky adjusts the numbers! Haha! (I don't know though, four goals is a lot to win by in this league.)
Response:

Turner is OLD

BY: McG
Dec 6th, 2011 @ 10:50AM



I've been a Nord now for 7 weeks, and all I've heard from JT for 7 weeks is "I'm 41 now" and "My shoulder hurts" and "I'm too old for this" and blah blah blah. This is your new reality:




Response:

Ha Ha Ha

BY: kpark
Dec 6th, 2011 @ 12:02PM


Turner is as old as shit....but he plays like a guy who is no older than 39.
Response:

PARK!!!!!!!!! MEYER!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOW !!!!!!!!

BY: NVRaWRSTR
Dec 6th, 2011 @ 11:03AM


Meyer the Face for the Upper Valley Elite Hockey League.......
Park how did you get the centerfold Shot??? You should have showed more skin..Pick up Your copy of Upper Valley Life Magazine...Read the article and Congratulate PARK when you see him..
will you autograph my copy?????

Response:

It's True!

BY: kpark
Dec 6th, 2011 @ 11:31AM


I am now officially kind of a big deal. J-Young, I am free for autographs before my game tonight but charge $20 per. Cash only.
Response:

Never was ????

BY: NVRaWRSTR
Dec 6th, 2011 @ 11:35AM


I never questioned the fact that you were a big deal but that Photo Looks way to professional for the UVHL..
I will bring my $20 and look forward to it..
Response:

Post Article

BY: rgrunds
Dec 6th, 2011 @ 10:15PM


Can you post the article?
Response:

Score Sheet Police

BY: klazar327
Dec 7th, 2011 @ 4:31PM


Tim Barrett had a 3rd period goal, I dont think Fletcher scored

Response:

BY: TB11
Dec 7th, 2011 @ 6:26PM


true words.
Response:

Good Effort by DR

BY: JTStally
Dec 7th, 2011 @ 5:10PM


We didn't bring our A-game and we got beat by a team that played better than us, plain and simple. As I said, I was surprised Dead River hadn't won yet and we became their first victim, unfortunately. O well, we'll have to play better next week, if we want to win games in this league!
Response:

DON'T assault Turner

BY: rgrunds
Dec 12th, 2011 @ 12:24PM


he's very fragile and complex.
Response:

Marshy's own end?

BY: rgrunds
Dec 12th, 2011 @ 12:25PM


"Marsh was excellent in the game as he compiled a trio of assists and solidified the blue line, a tough task for a forward who rarely enters his own defensive end."

From what I hear, all kinds of things enter "his own end".

yeah.
Response:

Fucking hilarious, Grundy!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 12th, 2011 @ 1:43PM


Now THAT was a good zinger, Bob. HAHAHAHA!

McD
Response:

Tuck Crunches Numbers

BY: JTStally
Dec 12th, 2011 @ 1:04PM


What's the story from the Tuck group? Will they be in town? Are they too busy studying for finals to make this late tilt? What's the word?

With all those questions still out there, I'm going with the Whale. But, it was a good battle last time, so we'll have to see what Tuck brings to the game.
Response:

HAHAHA!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 12th, 2011 @ 1:42PM


SO true, Park! Marshy: a forward who rarely enters his own defensive end. And he thinks about playing D? Lets get Marshy off our Nordiques PK first, and then and only then could he think about playing D in the B League or Thursday morning. Lets keep our big winger doing what he does best: waist-high passes and big blasts from the top of the circle.

McD
Response:

Mancuso rules

BY: hkydoc
Dec 12th, 2011 @ 1:46PM


Mancuso roasted me twice on his cut across breakaway goals and I haven't slept at night since. I'm just as much his bitch as Turner is. There was nothing I could do to stop him. I hate myself.

McD
Response:

Go Nords Go

BY: habman
Dec 13th, 2011 @ 8:48AM


School concert might delay my arrival.
Response:

Tuck will show...

BY: kpark
Dec 13th, 2011 @ 2:02PM


And I will be representing them on defense, just to turn Stally inside out. Ok, I can barely turn my jersey inside out, but I will most likely do something to influence the outcome of this game...unfortunately for Tuck, it will probably be a couple of turnovers that lead to goals against.

Go Tuck!
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Dec 13th, 2011 @ 8:52PM


What I\'m gonna do to the Brewers in my return

http://www.barstoolsports.com/boston/super-page/10-year-old-hockey-brawl-in-kazakhstan/
Response:

Seriously?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 14th, 2011 @ 11:12AM


You all can suck suck a fart, right outta my ass. Grundy, there is nothing going anywhere but OUT of my ass..and McD, my presence on the PK is fine..I come on the ice, 45 secs..skate like hell and OFF! When was the last time you saw me make a mistake that caused us a goal against? IN an attempt to whip it around the boards, you nearly scored on our OWN net last night! All in good fun boys, I DO like playing D,but I know I need more practice learning the position..don't worry, not gonna make the switch to D just yet...we HAVE a good D...but practice is good, and fun for a change..Grundy, when you comin to the area again? I could use a few more comedic points in the write ups after another swiss-cheese performance from the Grund-meister.
Response:

Someone Needs a Nap...

BY: rgrunds
Dec 14th, 2011 @ 12:43PM


Marshy, you stop that. You're in a state.

Now you just better retreat to your room with a primal cut of beef and think about things. Everyone will be here when you're ready to come out.


Response:

Ok..

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 14th, 2011 @ 11:14PM


I had my nap...I feel better. Now where WAS that primal of beef? Ribeye hopefully...ahhhhhhhh meat.
Response:

That's better

BY: rgrunds
Dec 15th, 2011 @ 2:28PM


You can sit in the TV room now. Bring your blankie if you like.
Response:

Stop kidding yourself, Buddy.

BY: hkydoc
Dec 17th, 2011 @ 1:35AM


Sorry to call you out, but you asked for it with your selective memory. You mean you don't remember at least ONE little old playoff game a few years ago that we lost as a direct result of your PK prowess? I do. So does JT. So does Kelly. We're still pissed off about it, too. Skating like hell chasing guys who aren't scoring threats and getting out of position is NOT a good PK!

If playing D in the mornings or subbing in on DR or Tuck makes you even 10% better defensively, then I am all for it! Just don't think your PK presence in the A league is just fine - cuz it ain't. Same thing with my presence on the PP, cuz I have absolutely no business being on the point a man up unless I'm in the B league or an over 35 division. The truth hurts...but at least I apply it both ways. And yes, I misfired on that clearing attempt, and recall doing that once before a year or two ago. Luckily I didn't score my only goal of the season on JT as a result, eh.

See you on the ice, Bro. We'll be on opposite special teams, eh.

McDefense
Response:

C.R.S

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 17th, 2011 @ 2:23PM


Apparently my periodic pre-game rituals have tapped out my memory, as a result I need you to tell me which game that was. I don't remember being the cause for a goal on the PK, let alone being the REASON we lost. That's pretty harsh McD, I don't consider myself a liability on the ice ANYTIME. I may not be the quickest player out there, and most times I take criticism best I can, but I honestly don't remember. The truth does hurt a bit, considering you guys are STILL pissed off apparently. Why the hell would you not have said something? The fact you guys haven't, tells me it wasn't that big of a goal to give up, or I think I'd remember it. It I water under the bridge now, but you're right the truth does hurt sometimes. I was merely entertaining the idea of getting better on D, and me practising was for myself only, not to try and put it out there that I was entitled to switch if I wanted to. Again, I think I do a decent job on the PK, but maybe I'll let someone else younger and faster chase the other team around. Then there'll be no blame on me, that no one talks about...next time speak up.
Response:

5 goals in 23 shots?

BY: rgrunds
Dec 15th, 2011 @ 2:30PM


Say it's not so. Next thing Turner's going to tell me he's not a virgin.


Response:

HA HA HA...REALLY?!?!?

BY: kpark
Dec 15th, 2011 @ 4:34PM


Look at the picture from the New England Senior Hockey League...too fucking funny!

http://sports.yahoo.com/nhl/blog/puck_daddy/post/Puck-Headlines-Kings-coach-update-glove-defeca?urn=nhl-wp19958
Response:

Further reporting

BY: McG
Dec 16th, 2011 @ 10:15AM


Response:

SO fucking funny!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 17th, 2011 @ 1:26AM


I literally laughed and kept chuckling for 10 minutes at the office today after I read this gem! I forwarded it to at least 4-5 people so they could enjoy it, too. CLASSIC!

McD
Response:

Bummer :(

BY: JTStally
Dec 18th, 2011 @ 2:07PM


Looks like my lead feet were missed in our defensive zone for this one. No worries Parky, I'll be back to shut you down this coming week when we beat the Nords!
Response:

DON'T Call Marshy The Butcher

BY: rgrunds
Dec 19th, 2011 @ 11:49AM


of Hanover.

He's very sensitive.
Response:

Write Up

BY: Garrentee
Dec 19th, 2011 @ 12:30PM


I appreciate whoever wrote the write-up for last weeks Brewers/Gamblers matchup but come on!! Had to be the worst reffing display in UVie history! The tandem of McD and Hadley couldnt even tie there skates let alone figure how many guys were supposed to be on the ice...Still love you guys though.

Love
G
Response:

Yes...

BY: kpark
Dec 19th, 2011 @ 12:58PM


Garren, that was me who wrote the write-up, I didn't actually ref that game, but watched a good portion and heard WAY too much bitching. The bottom line is that even if the reffing is poor, you are all GROWN FUCKING MEN. Act like it. The bitching and whining is out of control from both the Gamblers & Brewers and I felt like a public lashing in the write-up would be the only way to try and curb it.

I love the competitiveness of the league, but it's downright embarrassing to see grown men screaming and whining like that. The refs knew what they were getting into with those two teams playing one another, it is never pretty and is a horrible experience for any ref. They made an effort to try and curb the physicality and chippiness of the game by calling it tight, if you didn't like it, so be it. Deal with it or move on.

It's harsh, but we need to protect the refs. Any player who has the balls to sit there and say the refs suck should really take a full season of donning the stripes. I'm thinking it may be a mandatory assessment to pick a few "mouthy" players from each team and require them to ref the next season if they want to play.

We will also be instilling a zero tolerance rule...abuse the refs verbally and sit. If the ref hears too much chatter from the bench...the team will be assessed a bench minor.

Each captain needs to man up and tell his team to shut the fuck up if they are getting out of control.

KP


Response:

Tee Hee

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 19th, 2011 @ 1:01PM


I for one am glad we're playing the Whale this week. I don't think the stress of this busy week would pair well with playing either the Brewers or especially the Whiners...oops, sorry, the Gamblers
Response:

Nords vs. Whale

BY: JTStally
Dec 19th, 2011 @ 4:16PM


I agree with Parky in that it's just men's league. We're all past our prime here, so there's no need to keep pretending like we're living the competitive, road-to-the-show dream.

As far as the Nords vs. the Whale, there's always a good two-hand or two, but other than that, usually a well-spirited and clean game. I just wish we didn't so many of them :( Haha!
Response:

2011 Whiner of the year

BY: SK8VT
Dec 20th, 2011 @ 10:36AM


I think we should have a 2011-12 Whiner of the year (if thats spelled right). I think everyone/or most people is just about sick of the bitching in this mens league (little boys league) so like POW we should vote on WhineOW but have it go all season and give out an award at the end so people can vote every week, somehow put everyones name up and see who gets the most tallies.
Response:

I got one for ya

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 21st, 2011 @ 3:51PM


I'll get it started Jordy...I think we all know the usual suspects...most of them are on one team! I know who my "Bets" are on.
Response:

now now

BY: vtdownhiller
Dec 21st, 2011 @ 4:11PM


To build better league unity I think it would be best to refrain from this activity. Also it is a good idea not to throw stones in glass houses
Response:

I agree

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 21st, 2011 @ 10:17PM


nothing left to say.
Response:

Parky's Nervous!

BY: JTStally
Dec 20th, 2011 @ 5:07PM


He's picking his team in a shootout, that's always a cop out! We're excited. We felt like we let the last one slip away and we're hoping to find a way to get a few more behind JT tonight. Bring your A-game Nords :)
Response:

New year, New game

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 21st, 2011 @ 3:52PM


Nords gonna start out the year with an upset of the Blers
Response:

Excellent News for Kelly

BY: rgrunds
Dec 26th, 2011 @ 7:59PM


They discovered a cure for penis envy.


Response:

Bin Feiden. Beer is Forbidden

BY: rgrunds
Dec 28th, 2011 @ 8:46AM


It is not halal. You must not pollute yourself with the poison of the Anglo-Celtic (French too) Infidels against whom you have martyred yourself in net.

All of which means, I\'m happy to take it off your hands.....just to save you from yourself. I\'m only thinking of you.
Response:

Gamblers Use Voting Program

BY: rgrunds
Dec 31st, 2011 @ 12:45PM


Gamblers cheat to vote for Marrazzo when Feiden really deserves POW. Obvious plan of International Italian Conspiracy to Dominate Amateur Hockey against all others.

Response:

Explosives for Feiden?

BY: rgrunds
Dec 28th, 2011 @ 8:51AM


Is a suicide bombing appropriate here? Should he take out his team and El Matador too?
Response:

Hilarious

BY: SK8VT
Dec 30th, 2011 @ 9:17PM


http://www.barstoolsports.com/boston/super-page/11-video-of-2011-hockey-player-tomahawk-chops-opposing-player-in-the-head-with-stick/
Response:

Hilarious?

BY: kpark
Dec 30th, 2011 @ 10:15PM


I found absolutely nothing hilarious about that video. What a douchebag that guy is!
Response:

agreed

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 2nd, 2012 @ 2:52PM


Although it looks like he took his share of lumps, he should have gotten beat to hell for what he did..maybe sued? You could see he was actually cocked back, waiting for the guys to come to him, then chopped him...wow ridiculous
Response:

BY: voyer
Jan 1st, 2012 @ 7:32PM


Too much bubbly for u. If you think your hangover is bad now, wait til after the game.........
Response:

Me thinks not

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 2nd, 2012 @ 2:48PM


After playing the 'Blers..I'm usually left frustrated, and wondering what more we could have done. But this week, the Nords will hopefully be sending you 'Blers home with a headache. It's about time we beat you clowns
Response:

Big Game!

BY: JTStally
Jan 3rd, 2012 @ 4:00PM


With the first portion of the season out of the way, it's time for the Whale to get going. The Brewers seem to have this thing called consistency though, that sometimes escapes us Whalers. We beat them soundly last time, but I've played long enough to know the Brew Crew doesn't take lightly to losing!
Response:

Bin Feiden Must be Stopped

BY: rgrunds
Jan 4th, 2012 @ 4:17PM


POW award worst thing that could have happened. It will go directly to his head and encourage him.
Response:

Encouraged

BY: 1stPeriod
Jan 8th, 2012 @ 11:02PM


Yes, it is quite true, I feel very encouraged. POW for posting a winless season is what I was striving for all year. With that said, I'm hoping for a mere quantum miracle to propel the team to victory.
Response:

Check out the Tuck Hockey video

BY: jt
Jan 6th, 2012 @ 12:35PM


This is the link to the hockey video showing UVHL action.

http://www.youtube.com/user/TuckSchoolofBusiness
Response:

Awesome!

BY: kpark
Jan 6th, 2012 @ 1:12PM


My favorite part was Carrahill missing the empty netter @ 6:10. I can't believe they let you on the ice to film that in the middle of a game.
Response:

HA!

BY: hkydoc
Jan 6th, 2012 @ 5:05PM


Nice shot, Colin! Did you get 3 points for the field goal on that one? LVP!

McD
Response:

I apologize

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 6th, 2012 @ 6:22PM


Man, was I wrong...who was I to think we had a chance against the league's top offense? I guess we can only hope we'll play as a team next time we meet, and stop trying to skate with such a fast and talented squad. Will anyone be able to solve the Gamblers this season? I know one thing's for sure...one Gambler...we'll call him..."Insignificant" will no doubt have the eyes (and ears) of the league on him as he ridiculously celebrates like a freakin chimp bangin on his cage after every goal. Only classless players behave like this. Have some respect for your opponents as well as your teammates. You not only embarrass yourself, but I know for a fact, your own team thinks you're a joke.

Response:

Marshy...100% Agreed.

BY: kpark
Jan 10th, 2012 @ 9:42AM


Hey Marshy, I have to say that I agree 1000%. That was utterly classless of Young. Have some respect for your opponents, even if you are running up the score on them.
Response:

HUH? The new Gamblers\' poll doesn\'t make any sense, Park.

BY: hkydoc
Jan 7th, 2012 @ 9:23PM


I think you\'ve got a few things reversed. Did you do it after the Vancouver-Bruins game today in a fog of tears after throwing a tantrum?

McD
Response:

Wow!

BY: kpark
Jan 7th, 2012 @ 10:31PM


McD, I apparently was too drunk after the bender I went on after being -10 in an 11-3 loss to the Gamblers. I fixed it.

KP
Response:

I know the feeling...

BY: hkydoc
Jan 8th, 2012 @ 7:44PM


I'm still reeling from that loss, too. I've been angry all week!

I know lots of MAN-ipulation techniues, Grundy, but am sorry to disappoint you that they are confined only to the spine. Are you sure you're done? I'd expect at least one more retort out of you, Bob!

McD
Response:

No, That's it

BY: rgrunds
Jan 8th, 2012 @ 8:09PM


Someone paid attention to me. That's enough. I feel better. Kelly doesn't have to do therapy if he doesn't want.
Response:

Still F'd Up

BY: Grambo
Jan 9th, 2012 @ 4:59PM


Parky, must have been a tough weekend. "YES! My team will take them down!", still makes no sense. A little dyslexic, but that would definitely explain a thing or two from what I hear.
Response:

That's what happens

BY: rgrunds
Jan 8th, 2012 @ 8:11AM


when you don't treat penis envy. A form of dementia sets in. I told him to go to a doctor. You're a chiropractor....maybe you could do a "manipulation". I'm sure Kelly would make time for your special therapy.......
Response:

Hey Hey Hey

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 8th, 2012 @ 2:04PM


Grundy, what's the fascination with penis envy? Not the first time you've mentioned it...
Response:

Finally

BY: rgrunds
Jan 8th, 2012 @ 2:59PM


I just wanted someone to notice my joke.

All done, now.
Response:

Really? POW?

BY: vtdownhiller
Jan 9th, 2012 @ 1:30PM


Take away Ammels 5 points and the Gamble still wins easily. How is this a POW?
Response:

Yes...

BY: kpark
Jan 9th, 2012 @ 2:11PM


CJ, you've been in the league for 8 years and haven't put up a 3 point night. Danno not only contributed heavily on the scoresheet, but had a large impact on the game as well as creating additional scoring changes, causing turnovers and helping to keep the Nords off the board.


Response:

and...

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 9th, 2012 @ 4:55PM


I think Kelly may have a man-crush on the entire MMA line.
Response:

Who's your butt boy now?

BY: woody66
Jan 10th, 2012 @ 12:28PM


Wow, that's a man crush. Who sharpens your blade?
Response:

A Little Unfair?

BY: rgrunds
Jan 9th, 2012 @ 10:59PM


Osama Bin Feiden is a really good goalie. Why insult him when he's playing for a diminished team? Goalies are only as good as their defense.
Response:

Nordiques are in shambles

BY: kpark
Jan 10th, 2012 @ 9:40AM


The Nords are going to turn things around tonight, back to hockey basics, shutdown hockey, man-coverage. Oh and I'm going to take my two-minutes for laying out Scotty Howard! Although...he's built like a shit brickhouse...or is it a brick shithouse. Anyways, I guess I'll have to Marchand him and go low.

Good thing for me, I am the UVHL's "Shannanhammer", and will determine that I am not a repeat offender and give myself a $1.00 fine that will go to the UVHL Wounded Warriors fund (AKA Beer for the guys who got hurt).

See you boys on the ice.
Response:

O well...

BY: JTStally
Jan 12th, 2012 @ 11:45AM


We had a rough second period, but it's always fun to try to defend the MMA line. Hopefully one of these days we can slow them down for three periods...
Response:

CJ?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 13th, 2012 @ 4:23PM


Although he DID score the GWG in the last minute, I may need to be talked off the ledge if he beats me out for the P.O.W.

Response:

Marshy

BY: rgrunds
Jan 13th, 2012 @ 5:11PM


....jump.....!
Response:

In yer face Grundy

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 19th, 2012 @ 11:18AM


P.O.W.! Guess my Facebook plead to vote for me worked??? WOW! Or maybe my mom just voted for me like 68 times...whatever, I'll take it!
Response:

In yer face Grundy

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 19th, 2012 @ 11:18AM


P.O.W.! Guess my Facebook plead to vote for me worked??? WOW! Or maybe my mom just voted for me like 68 times...whatever, I'll take it!
Response:

GO NORDS!

BY: kpark
Jan 17th, 2012 @ 9:24AM


Alright, the Nords are back on track. Big win tonight! Go Nords!
Response:

Gamblers vs. Whalers

BY: Z-Skate
Jan 17th, 2012 @ 9:37AM


So I forgot to mention what a “joy” it was to play in this game which was so wonderfully officiated – I get that being a ref in this league is not fun but Jesus Christ, at the very least, can you watch the play instead of dreaming about a veggie plate swimming in blue cheese!!

Here is a pop quiz with two questions that I gave my daughter last night and she scored 100 percent:
1) An offensive player (in their offensive zone just to clarifying) attempts to make a pass to his D-man, who misses it and it goes the length of the ice – Is it icing? a) Yes or b) No
2) An offensive player in the corner (again in their offensive zone) makes a pass along the ice, it deflects off a defensive players stick (in their defensive zone) and goes out of the rink – where is the ensuing faceoff? a) Inside or b) Outside the zone
McD, the ref skills have deteriorated since taking to this veggie platter maybe you should go back to blue cheese with a side of chicken wings… veggies aren’t for everyone just ask Nicky Hall.

Much love buddy and I love the fact we can “air the dirty laundry “on a semi-public forum.

http://www.refschool.com/... Maybe the UVHL can send prospect here in the off-season?!

Response:

Zzzzz

BY: kpark
Jan 17th, 2012 @ 10:12AM


Z, that is a great quiz. I would like to take it. The answers are

1) a) yes
2) b) outside

100% baby! For a guy that sees the league as "just hockey" and tries to play it off like he doesn't care, you sure do seem as though you do care.

See you tonight you ice whore.

KP
Response:

Just Hockey

BY: Z-Skate
Jan 17th, 2012 @ 12:00PM


Got me there; it's also beer-n-wings!!


Response:

ZZZ

BY: SK8VT
Jan 17th, 2012 @ 3:48PM


You have a daughter Z, u and your life partner adopt?
Response:

Gamblers BY TEN!

BY: kpark
Jan 17th, 2012 @ 2:19PM


I put that that the Gamblers were going to win by 10 goals and NOBODY COMMENTS! Come on Tuck, have some heart!
Response:

Turner's Assignment

BY: rgrunds
Jan 18th, 2012 @ 9:23PM


I thought he was sent to Burkina Faso with the Ougadougou club.....you know....the Ougadougou Shrunken Heads....

change of climate will do him good......
Response:

No DR Whalers Score?

BY: rgrunds
Jan 19th, 2012 @ 10:20PM


Did someone die?
Response:

sorry

BY: kpark
Jan 20th, 2012 @ 2:21PM


it was fixed!

Response:

Greatest!

BY: kpark
Jan 20th, 2012 @ 2:22PM


This has got to be the GREATEST Men\'s League team name, Jersey & Logo I have ever seen.

The Peter North Stars!!!!



If you don\'t get the reference, Peter North is a porn star!
Response:

Male Porn Stars

BY: JTStally
Jan 25th, 2012 @ 11:19AM


Sorry that I'm not up to speed on male porn stars and that I have no desire to catch up...but thanks for clarifying...I guess...
Response:

Drywall Specialist?

BY: kpark
Jan 23rd, 2012 @ 1:09PM


Hey, does anyone know of a drywall pro looking to make some cash? Specifically, I\'m finishing my basement and need someone to tape & mud about 800 sq ft of walls & ceiling.

If so, drop me a line or have them email me kpark@parkcreative.com.

KP
Response:

c'mon Bin Feiden

BY: rgrunds
Jan 24th, 2012 @ 11:07PM


Rally the Morbid Riparians. Surely you will take the infidel,Christian Nordiques and force them to taste their own, severed genitals. Ha. That large demon Marshie will eat new meat.....

Hang on, I'm gonna ululate.....
Response:

Fighting Poll

BY: JTStally
Jan 25th, 2012 @ 11:15AM


I think a year suspension is too long for a fight, sometimes people let their emotions get the better of them...However, I think both guys involved should get at least a game or two. It shouldn\'t just be the instigator as it DOES take two to tango!
Response:

True....

BY: kpark
Jan 25th, 2012 @ 11:25AM


But I'm thinking more in terms of someone being goaded into a fight by a cheap shot, sucker punch or some other antic. There are times when a player needs to defend himself. Should someone defending themselves be booted for that game and the next?

There are just some guys out there that need to get their asses kicked to be straightened out and the fear of a long suspension allows those douchebags in the league to get away with bullshit.

Some leagues completely shun fighting with year long bans or lifetime bans, which is too harsh. Some leagues allow fighting with only a 5 minute major. I'm somewhere in the middle.

KP
Response:

Somewhere in the middle

BY: JTStally
Jan 25th, 2012 @ 11:46AM


I am too, which is why I voted None of the Above. I would prefer there be no fighting in the league, which is why I think there should be a game minimum to deter it. However, if a guy instigates a fight with a dirty play, I don't think it's out of the commish's jurisdiction to give him additional time off. If that player goes on the scoresheet for a penalty that started a fight, it should be clear who was responsible for the altercation.

A year is definitely too long unless someone takes a dump in the other guy's glove or something like that...
Response:

My take..

BY: The Dark Canuck
Jan 25th, 2012 @ 11:48AM


I think I'm with Park on this one. Although I have no problem with us policing ourselves, fighting is not for everyone. It WOULD clear up a lot of the cheap shots, and slashing and all-around dirty crap, It DOES take two to tango as Stally stated. In the situation where two players are mutually ready to throw down, there should be a 5-minute major, and that's it. In the situation where a player grabs a hold of someone and just starts pummeling them, they should be thrown out, and given at least a 1-game suspension and a review from the UVHL Shannahammer. For myself, I have contemplated a fight here and there, but ultimately we play only 1 game per week. Tues night hockey is like most married guys, their one or two nights out of the house per week, to let off some steam and share the camaraderie with the guys we all need as manly men. (Insert manly grunting here) But if there were rules in place where BOTH players received the same 5 minute penalty for MUTUALLY wanting to duke it out, then I see no problem with that, granted it is a fair fight, and no one gets the absolute snot beat out of them, in that situation, the ref would need to break it up before it gets out of hand. So, I say...matching 5 minutes for each...
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Jan 25th, 2012 @ 12:05PM


This isn't college though or the NHL. It's a no-contact Men's League

Two guys fighting, both responsible, should be a 1 game suspension per player.

Commishiners should have the right to dish out an extra game using there descretion. Not just siding with Park because he is on my team but Garren should get two games for clearly instigating that and whether park wanted to fight or not, he took about 5 punches before even having the chance to defend himself. Someone clearly instigating a fight like this one no matter who it is should no doubt recieve a second game
Response:

tough words

BY: vtdownhiller
Jan 25th, 2012 @ 7:52PM


Actually in college there was a no tolerance rule. There wasn't any fighting and the referring was more strict.
I know you watched that game but to single out Garren for being the only instigator in that fight then you are mistaken. You have heard Kelly's mouth.? I am quite sure from the scorekeepers bench you missed something not to mention there are reasons why kelly got hit a few times... he was allowed off the ice, he dropped his gloves willingly and got his ass kicked. Whatever. Greg Hadley and I went at it earlier this season, we both felt bad after and I am greatful we walked away still friends. This discussion wouldn't be going on if it wasn't kelly and he got his ass kicked. Let the referees do their jobs and let the commissioners sit on the sidelines. The rules in USA hockey are already outlined.... what are we discussing.?
Response:

Tough Words?

BY: kpark
Jan 25th, 2012 @ 9:24PM


CJ, you can't really compare this to you and Hadley's fight. You both looked at each other, said "You want to go" and decided to drop the gloves and go at it. Garren dropped his gloves and sucker-punched me twice before my fucking gloves came off. So that is an absolute horse shit comparison.

Yeah, I completely think two guys should have the right to go at it if they are both WILLING participants. Tell me how you would react if someone dropped their gloves and punched you a couple times. Secondly, I'm pretty sure I didn't get my ass kicked, I walked out of there with a bruised lip and a dislocated finger...and never even had the chance to take off both my gloves. You willingly went into a fight with Hadley and got your ass kicked, busted up face. So before you start running your mouth on here check the facts.

Secondly, what we are discussing is how to improve the league, keep our players safe and cut down on the bullshit. We have already edited the USA Hockey rules to make the league better, cutting the # of penalties from 5 to 4 for a player to be booted out of the game and we are constantly looking at how to improve the league.

Bottom line is, should everyone always be looking over their shoulder worried that someone is going to Bertuzzi them just because their having a bad day and there aren't any additional ramifications? Hell no!

KP
Response:

BY: SK8VT
Jan 26th, 2012 @ 1:04PM


First off I have nothing against garren what so ever, go have beers after the game whatever its all good but to say he didnt start or instigate that is probably the biggest bunch of bull I think i have ever heard. I might have been in the box but i knew exactly what was going on and when two players are skating side by side and one completley turns around and throws a punch, yeah that is an instigator... Park def hooked Garren which led to it but doesnt Garren hook about 40 people per game, does that give them a right to start throwing punches? And yeah theres more too it that you dont know that im not gonna say on here cause well personally I dont give a shit. Park never said 1 word to me about the fight and who cares we are all big boys here but to say that wasn't instigating by 1 person then well thats probably the dumbest thing i have ever heard
Response:

ahem...... an idea

BY: rgrunds
Jan 28th, 2012 @ 12:39PM


I was just thrown out of a league last week for inflaming a much larger player with my disturbing mind and mouth. Thank God. I would have become a little, wet, raw spot on the ice.

BUT, the point is, a system to avoid fights should be contemplated.

IDEA: Create a system of warnings, after which, if a player continues to act in a precipitous manner, (before he starts a fight), he gets a big penalty. Let's say someone has hooked a couple times in a game. A player can go to the official and say "fucker's hooking tonight". The official can watch and if he sees a hook or two, will give a "Pre Fight Warning" along with the normal penalty. If the warned player does something bad again, he will get the normal penalty plus an additional 5 minute penalty for creating the conditions for a fight. Pre Fight warnings can only be given for certain penalties (not icing) performed a specific number of times before the warning.

In this way, the person most likely to create the conditions for a fight is identified and possibly removed from the ice for prolonged periods to cool everything down.

People who start fights without provocation (in desperate, industrial wastelands like Cleveland, players will attack skaters just for being better) will be in a class easy to identify and penalized a game. If they can't control themselves, they get expelled from the league.

There is more than one kind of fight. Someone who defends themselves from a disproportionate attack should be allowed to fight. People who quietly antagonize someone for an entire period aren't innocent and get penalized. Large Jag-Bags get put down a well head-first.
Response:

ahem...... an idea

BY: rgrunds
Jan 28th, 2012 @ 12:39PM


I was just thrown out of a league last week for inflaming a much larger player with my disturbing mind and mouth. Thank God. I would have become a little, wet, raw spot on the ice.

BUT, the point is, a system to avoid fights should be contemplated.

IDEA: Create a system of warnings, after which, if a player continues to act in a precipitous manner, (before he starts a fight), he gets a big penalty. Let's say someone has hooked a couple times in a game. A player can go to the official and say "fucker's hooking tonight". The official can watch and if he sees a hook or two, will give a "Pre Fight Warning" along with the normal penalty. If the warned player does something bad again, he will get the normal penalty plus an additional 5 minute penalty for creating the conditions for a fight. Pre Fight warnings can only be given for certain penalties (not icing) performed a specific number of times before the warning.

In this way, the person most likely to create the conditions for a fight is identified and possibly removed from the ice for prolonged periods to cool everything down.

People who start fights without provocation (in desperate, industrial wastelands like Cleveland, players will attack skaters just for being better) will be in a class easy to identify and penalized a game. If they can't control themselves, they get expelled from the league.

There is more than one kind of fight. Someone who defends themselves from a disproportionate attack should be allowed to fight. People who quietly antagonize someone for an entire period aren't innocent and get penalized. Large Jag-Bags get put down a well head-first.
Response:

Bias

BY: klazar327
Jan 30th, 2012 @ 1:55PM


I think when the commissioner is involved in a fight or his team is involved in fight a third party should come in and look at the facts. I wasn't there when Garren and Kelly fought,but I have heard two very drastic accounts of what actully happend. It's seem like the league (Kelly and McD) are taking the side of Kelly. They were both directly involved with this situation and they are the ones making the final call. I can't they believe can put a new rule in after everything thing is said and done. There should be no retroactive actions making Garren sit out another game. There was no instigator rule before the Garren/Kelly fight, so why should Garren have to sit again?
Response:

Unbiased Perspective

BY: GamblinWoodie
Jan 30th, 2012 @ 2:30PM


I've refrained from commenting on the issue so far but as I was an on-ice official for the game, here are my thoughts. I'm not going to type out a detailed account of what I saw on the ice, if you would like that you can ask me personally.

Based strictly on the on-ice actions, immediately following the game I would have suspended Garren for 2-3 games and Kelly for 1. I would not have waited to see what the fallout was, who was hurt or any of that. Garren's actions were flagrant and unprovoked and deserved a stiffer penalty than Kelly's, who fought, but did so to defend himself.

Could the suspension been handled better, yes, I think so. Ultimately is it the right call, absolutely.
Response:

UVHL Tough Mudder Squad

BY: GamblinWoodie
Jan 25th, 2012 @ 12:20PM


Anyone interested in the Vermont Tough Mudder @ Mt Snow in July?

http://toughmudder.com/

http://toughmudder.com/events/new-england-2-sat-july-14-sun-july-15-2012/

Early registration (read: cheap) ends on Sunday, can still register after it\'s just a little more expensive.

I definitely think we should get a group together to own the course, it\'s not a race, it\'s camaraderie and getting everyone to finish, and you get a beer when you cross the line. Good deal no?

Man the fuck up and join in.
Response:

Tough Mudder & UVHL go hank in hand

BY: voyer
Jan 31st, 2012 @ 9:28PM


There is an ex UVHL player working for TM. Check the website http://toughmudder.com/about-us/
Response:

typo

BY: voyer
Jan 31st, 2012 @ 9:33PM


Tough Mudder & UVHL go Hand in Hand
Response:

I'm confused

BY: JTStally
Jan 26th, 2012 @ 10:56AM


How did the Nords win two goals to three? According to the top bar and the standings, the Nords get credit for the W...
Response:

Final

BY: GamblinWoodie
Jan 26th, 2012 @ 12:57PM


Final score was 3-2 Nords.
Response:

Oh ok!

BY: JTStally
Jan 26th, 2012 @ 1:17PM


That makes sense, so the box score was incorrect and the Nords did win. Gotcha!
Response:

Jaz Zanleoni?!?!?

BY: kpark
Jan 26th, 2012 @ 10:05PM


Ok...I had NO idea that Jay Zanleoni moonlighted for the Philadelphia Flyers.


Response:

Shot counter.

BY: GamblinWoodie
Feb 6th, 2012 @ 11:18AM


Whoever thought they were counting shots was a bit off. Conversation between Greg and I on Thursday:

G - So how many shots did you see the other night, be honest.
J - Ahh, I think 3? Maybe?
G - Ha, I was thinking 4 or 5.
J - Hmm, split the difference and go with 4? Bored out of my mind, that game sucked.

I will the second star to the Big Topo / Little Topo two headed monster.
Response:

Are you fucked in the head?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 7th, 2012 @ 2:56PM


I hope we keep it closer than that tonight...there IS a good chance we will have a very tough time winning this one, but I know we won't just give them the game...they ARE in for a tough win IF they get one
Response:

BY: habman
Feb 7th, 2012 @ 3:57PM


That pre-game write up worked to get Marshy fired up. Don't forget that another case of beers could be yours for the taking if you light it up. And I don't mean the smokey stuff.
Response:

Gamblers by 12!?

BY: JTStally
Feb 7th, 2012 @ 5:05PM


Come on, seriously!? I mean the Gamblers are a very good team, but I don't think think even the craziest of Las Vegas betters would bet on a 12-goal spread in this one!

How about 5? I think that's a little more realistic. 8-3? That's fair.
Response:

I'll do what I can..

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 7th, 2012 @ 6:16PM


I would love nothing more than to hand the G-men their first loss, but they have a great team. We will no doubt have to on our game to beat 'em, I will also keep the lungs clear until this one's over...case of LT and a win..priceless

Response:

5 shots on goal?

BY: rgrunds
Feb 10th, 2012 @ 3:12PM


Really? Did you guys just play a scrimmage?
Response:

Might as well have been

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 12th, 2012 @ 1:31PM


After the 4th goal,(in the first period) the sub goalie JT had come out, winced in pain after injuring himself lunging to make a Hasek-like save, could not continue end of the first. We played the 2nd with 6 skaters and an empty net, only to have Robbie from our team use the guy's goalie gear and go in net for most of the 3rd, only letting up 3 more...not bad at alll...I would have hidden behind the net.
Response:

That was noble

BY: rgrunds
Feb 12th, 2012 @ 1:55PM


Gentlemanly. Did JT pull a labia? I hope not.

Can I have my chuck quote now?

ES
Response:

POW Bin Feiden

BY: rgrunds
Feb 10th, 2012 @ 3:14PM


for actually showing up after a season of relentless abuse and then, winning this game.
Response:

Bin Feiden Beer is so Excellent

BY: rgrunds
Feb 28th, 2012 @ 7:16AM


You\'ve always been the best goalie possible, ever, in the UVHL. Disregard every post I made about JT. I was just fooling. Can I help you carry the beer home?
Response:

BY: 1stPeriod
Feb 28th, 2012 @ 5:01PM


Do be cautious with your wording. JT is a fragile being who just needs to be loved.
Response:

yeahsurewhatever

BY: rgrunds
Feb 28th, 2012 @ 5:07PM


canIjusthavesomefuckingbeernow?

Pleez
Response:

Ok

BY: rgrunds
Feb 28th, 2012 @ 5:10PM


I'll send him a stuffed animal. Better?

Now, back to beer....
Response:

Icemen?

BY: 1stPeriod
Feb 28th, 2012 @ 5:06PM


Nobody informed me of the mascot change. Does this mean we get new jerseys? If we're going to continue to degrade the quality of the league, I think we're going to need more style.
Response:

We sucked

BY: hkydoc
Feb 29th, 2012 @ 1:22PM


I can't remember the last time we played so horribly... Congrats to the Dead River squad on their win - they deserved it and we didn't rise to the challenge.

McD
Response:

Hip Check Of the Year!

BY: kpark
Mar 2nd, 2012 @ 9:49AM



Response:

Way to go Habs!

BY: JTStally
Mar 7th, 2012 @ 10:19AM


Another awesome play in what's been a fun season to watch (for me, at least).
Response:

Men's League Gordie

BY: JTStally
Mar 7th, 2012 @ 10:22AM


I try to remain modest most of the time, but I was excited to pick up the Men's League Gordie Howe last night with a goal, assist and penalty. I know that's just an average Tuesday for some of the Brewers, but considering it was my first career penalty and third career goal, it was a feat for me!
Response:

SOLID!

BY: kpark
Mar 8th, 2012 @ 7:40AM


You earned it kid! But the scorekeeper had Gaudet getting both penalties for the Whale. Which was you, hold in the first or trip in the second?
Response:

Fine

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 13th, 2012 @ 1:46PM


You did your homework Stally. Shannahammer is one of my all-time favorite players, in fact I met him in Toronto for All-Star weekend in 2000. I have yet to wash that hand, and have been cited for food safety violations repeatedly, but I refuse to wash away that silky soft handshake I experienced that day....ahhhhhh...Ok, that was kinda gay, but nonetheless a great experience! how about a Shanatrick? Or a Shanahatty?
Response:

We have a Shanatic!

BY: JTStally
Mar 13th, 2012 @ 2:42PM


Shanahatty made me laugh, so I'll vote for that one. It's your call though, as you're clearly the Shanatic. I agree, he was an awesome player...very much an average disciplinarian...but certainly one of the most fun people to watch on the ice. I still remember when he played for the old Whalers, he was probably the only thing that made that sorry lot noticeably better than the crew now in the UHVL, HA!
Response:

Tripping?

BY: JTStally
Mar 8th, 2012 @ 9:12AM


It was more like "The Dentist" skated into my stick and fell over it, but, yes, that was me in the second :)
Response:

Disgraced

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 11th, 2012 @ 1:19PM


Stally, men's league or not, A Gordie Howe hat trick is a goal, an assist and a FIGHT. Since there are very few fights in this league, this feat rarely happens. But out of respect for true fans of Mr. Hockey, call it...something else.
Response:

With All Respect

BY: JTStally
Mar 12th, 2012 @ 10:47AM


I was obviously just having some fun with this rare statistical occurrence for a guy that never appears on the stat sheet, but, if you want to be serious, let's be serious.

If you're a true fan of Mr. Hockey, you'd probably know that the term "Gordie Howe hat trick" in reference to a player getting a goal, assist and a fight vastly misconstrues history. It's believed that only twice in his 1767-game NHL career did Howe ever do all three in the same game (0.11% of games played). By comparison, the current Dictator of Discipline, Brendan Sham-ahan had 17 (1.11%)! That means that on any given night in their careers, Shanny was TEN times more likely to get a goal, assist and a fight than Mr. Hockey.

Over the course of his career, Howe had 22 fights and 1685 PIMs. Let's assume (for stats sake) that each of those PIMs accounted for a minor, he'd have taken 842.5 penalties in his NHL career. That's 38 times as many fights as he had, so we could estimate he might have had roughly 76 games in which he got a goal, assist and a PENALTY...just something worth considering before claiming that I somehow dragged Gordie Howe's good name through the mud.
Response:

Howe

BY: rgrunds
Mar 12th, 2012 @ 1:42PM


Right. Howe actually didn't fight that much. Everyone was terrified of him. Very strong.

Ask Lou Fontinato. Maybe he found his ear.

Marshy, where's my meat quote?
Response:

Untruth

BY: klazar327
Mar 20th, 2012 @ 9:24AM


That plus/minus you said I have is far from accurat, but it doesn't matter because chics dig goals not plus/minus
Response:

Gamblers' Secret

BY: JTStally
Mar 21st, 2012 @ 11:55AM


For a long time, we've been hearing about the MMA line, or the MGM Grand line, as it stands now. That, and one of the LaCroix's seems to be up for P.O.W. every single week, but I think the secret is finally out on this team. She might not fill the headlines every single week, but the team went 21-0 with Allison Malcolm in the lineup this season and they're 0-1 without her.

While it's clearly not good for the rest of us, I hope both Allison and Rob have speedy recoveries. It was too bad to see both of them injured on the bench last night.

--

Btw, how about the Whalers? Only team in the league to beat the Gamblers and only team in the league to lose twice to Dead River. That's just how the Whale breaches!
Response:

GAME TIME! SECOND PLACE!

BY: kpark
Mar 21st, 2012 @ 9:35PM


It\'s not whether you win or loose, it\'s how you play the game...BULLSHIT!


Response:

Summer League?

BY: kpark
Mar 27th, 2012 @ 6:21PM


Hey guys, chatting with Dan @ Union Arena and he was hoping to put together a TRUE \"A\" Summer league with 4 teams. Does anyone have any interest in running a team and/or playing?

Thanks,
Kelly
Response:

Well Played Game

BY: JTStally
Mar 28th, 2012 @ 10:41AM


I, for one, was bummed that we drew Tuck in the first round and they definitely brought it as expected. Only a few late goals made the score look like we had it in hand. It was a clean game too, which certainly made McD's solo reffing duties a lot easier.

For the second year in a row, the Whale is on to the next round! (Btw, was this the first time the Whale has ever been a home team for a playoff game!?)
Response:

Brief Science Lesson

BY: JTStally
Apr 2nd, 2012 @ 1:19PM


Last week, Ken was nominated as Player of the Week for being \"old as shit against the Gamblers.\" I was a little confused by the statement.

Scientifically speaking, fecal matter, more commonly referred to as \"shit,\" will decompose quickly into soil and provide nutrients for plant life. Thus, the reason that the phrase used to reference a person\'s significant amount of years is \"old as dirt\" (or \"older THAN dirt\"), not \"old as shit.\" While I understand that in today\'s world of running water and flushing toilets, that the average human doesn\'t usually take a dump in the woods, it only furthers the argument that this statement was inaccurate.

In fact, the age of shit will almost always be relatively new and relatively fresh. Thus, the statement that Ken Lallier played like he was \"old as shit\" against the Gamblers is ironically true, since he looked very new and very fresh in his strong shutout performance.

That said, I don\'t think the maker of the poll thought that far into the definition of the statement, and I do believe the intent of the statement was a scientific mistake. I hope that this helped provide a little more knowledge on the situation.
Response:

Ha Ha Ha!

BY: kpark
Apr 2nd, 2012 @ 1:47PM


Stally, too funny. You're an asshole!
Response:

We Need Two Refs

BY: JTStally
Apr 4th, 2012 @ 12:56PM


I\'m usually in light spirits on the UVHL Message Board, but I have a serious complaint today. We pay enough money and spend enough time with this league that we should have two refs for every game.

The fact that we\'ve only had one ref in each of our two playoff rounds is unacceptable and below league standards. While we\'re all out here to have fun, I think we also take it seriously enough that we expect to have two refs on any given night. We spend 22 weeks playing in a competitive regular season with a quick three-week sprint to the Whalen Cup, and we deserve more than having one poor guy trying to call the entire semifinal round.

I understand issues come up, but I\'m not looking for excuses, I\'m looking toward the future. I anticipate that there will be two referees at next week\'s Whalen Cup.

Thanks for listening to my concerns,
Stally
Response:

You're right, Stally.

BY: hkydoc
Apr 7th, 2012 @ 2:39PM


I couldn't agree more with you. We had trouble getting outside refs this playoff season and I am disppointed to know that we didn't maintain the standard our players expect. Sorry, eh. However, I am happy to say that two outside refs are confirmed for Finals Night on Tuesday April 10th.

McD
Response:

Thanks McD

BY: JTStally
Apr 9th, 2012 @ 1:02PM


Thanks for getting it worked out. I don't want to seem like a guy that's just whining, but I'm glad you understand my sentiments...I'm looking forward to Finals Night!
Response:

Looking Forward to It!

BY: JTStally
Apr 10th, 2012 @ 11:23AM


It should be a fun game. Last time the two teams met I felt like it was a higher level of play than we usually see, so I expect both teams will be flying tonight!
Response:

That\'s It?

BY: rgrunds
Apr 19th, 2012 @ 1:03AM


That\'s all the acknowledgement the Whaler season gets?

Is this an indifference contest?
Response:

Summer Hockey

BY: kpark
Apr 30th, 2012 @ 4:19PM


Hey guys, I\'m looking for some players for the Summer \"A\" league put on by the Union Arena. Tomorrow is the last registration date I believe for $125 and then the price goes up to $140.

If you are looking for a team, go to UnionArena.org and click on Summer League Page.

When you are registering you can select Nordiques with the Access Code: Nords.

Thanks,
Kelly
Response:

Really?!

BY: Careen
May 1st, 2012 @ 10:55AM


Imagine my complete surprise upon learning that the Whalers took the coveted cup! This absolutely confirms my theory that team bonding is essential to a successful season. It was a toss up between the Brewers and the Whalers as to who won the Bentley's attendance award but I seem to remember one game when the Brewers were a no- show. I believe the Whalers had a perfect after-game attendance record, a factor that I am convinced played an important role in their success! Congrats to the Whales and thanks to you all for making my Tuesday nights fun!

Response:

The team bonding award

BY: Careen
May 1st, 2012 @ 11:08AM


Imagine my surprise upon learning that the Whalers took the coveted cup for the second year in a row ! Not that I didn\'t have faith in the Whales , but stats don\'t lie... or do they ? This absolutely confirms my theory that team bonding is essential to a successful season. It was a toss up between the Brewers and the Whalers as to who won the Bentley\'s attendance award but I seem to remember one game when the Brewers were a no- show. I believe the Whalers had a perfect after-game attendance record, a factor that I am convinced played an important role in their success! Perhaps the UVHL ought to consider including post-game attendance in their weekly stats? Congrats to the Whalers and thanks to you all for a great season and for making my Tuesday nights fun!
Response:

BY: Garrentee
May 4th, 2012 @ 7:38PM


Well said Careen!
Response:

Team Bonding

BY: KenL
May 9th, 2012 @ 9:15AM


Careen,
You are soooooo right on that! The Whalers really bonded as a team the past two years and that went a long way towards our success. Bentley's was no small part of that and we did consistently have a good attendance post game.
In fact, the Whalers want to have a small get together at Bentley's in the near future, but want to do it on a night that you are working, so let me know what your schedule is so we can coordinate the gathering!



Response:

Kelly I don\'t dislike you as much anymore would your Dad sign his book

BY: rgrunds
May 5th, 2012 @ 12:03PM


for me? I\'m really impressed. I\'m ordering my copy today.

Your father and brother are really impressive characters. You must be a real source of concern for them.


By the way...

You Owe Me Ten Dollars
Response:

Referee abuse is \'epidemic\'

BY: hkydoc
Jun 1st, 2012 @ 4:11PM


Check out this article from Slam Sports:

http://slam.canoe.ca/Slam/Hockey/News/2012/05/31/19823746.html

I felt so bad for this kid, the son of an NHL ref, an dlaughed my ass off at what his Mom did to the asshole parent. We deserve to take some minor abuse as an offical, we all see it differently, but not if it gets personal. There are a few UVHLers I\'d love to see put on the stripes for a season...

See you on the ice for summer hockey, eh!

McD
Response:

kelly kills brewers franchise

BY: vtdownhiller
Aug 10th, 2012 @ 4:26PM


In a move that kelly admitted was a solo decision he has decided to kick garren out of the league and in doing so has killed off the brewers franchise.
Your comments are appreciated.
Response:

Keep on keepin on Brew crew

BY: The Dark Canuck
Aug 11th, 2012 @ 11:02AM


The fact is, Garren is kicked out of the league for a reason. LIABILITY. Even a s his teammate, you have to admit, he's not exactly a clean hockey player. I'm not going to try and convince you that I play by the rules at all times, but the line has to be drawn.

I have personally seen "The Hook" take down people dangerously, and not in a competitive, hockey-checking way on several occasions. In fact, one of our players was taken down last year going to the net, and ultimately into the end boards, luckily with enough time to duck their head to avoid serious injury.

In all fairness to Garren, I DO respect his talent as a hockey player, and his grit on the ice for the most part. But I think he chose the wrong person to fuck with, being the co-commish. Given the length of the rehab time, and the seriousness of the injury, I'm sure he was still pretty bitter on what happened. It definitely takes two to fight, but there WAS a cheap shot at centre ice, and obviously Kelly needed to defend himself.

Your team is not dead. You are down ONE guy. Most guys are still gonna play, regardless of where Garren plays this coming fall. And if you all choose to leave, I guess that'd be shitty for the league, but it will go on.
Response:

What would you do?

BY: jt
Sep 8th, 2012 @ 1:30PM


Wow, 15 guys blame Kelly for quitting the league. I was not at the game but I did see effects of the injury on Kelly. Months away from the game, surgery and rehab for a fight that he was suckered into. Kelly may be reacting with a personal choice that is not a policy that is defensible, but it is his decision. Maybe there is a way to make a rule about fighting, instigation and resulting injuries moving forward. Kelly made the right call. Can anyone else say that they would not do the same thing in his shoes?
Response:

I agree with JT

BY: JTStally
Oct 10th, 2012 @ 10:34AM


I can understand that the Brewers would be bitter and walk from the league, since most of them were close with Garren. He was definitely a nice guy off the ice, so I'm sure he was a fun teammate. However, it's one guy, not the whole team, that got told to leave.

The Brewers were a good team last year, but it was no secret that the commitment wasn't there. I think if the team as a whole had been more into it that it would have stayed together and played this season as opposed to folding after the loss of its leader.
Response:

Pre-Season Ice Starts in ONE MONTH!

BY: kpark
Aug 17th, 2012 @ 3:08PM



Hey Guys,
The UVHL Season is still a couple months away, but we have secured some pre-season ice slots in September & October, to help get the rust off and cobwebs cleared.

We have five 1.5 hour skates. We are looking for the first 26 guys for each skate. If you can commit to all 5 it will only be $15 per skate or $75. If you would like to choose A LA CARTE, then it will be $20 per skate.

Mon 9/17 - 8:50 - 10:20pm
Tue 9/25 - 8:00 - 9:30pm
Sat 9/29 - 7:30 - 9:00pm
Thu 10/4 - 9:30 - 11pm
Thu 10/11 - 9:30 - 11pm

If you are interested please let me know by emailing me directly, kpark@parkcreative.com.

Thanks,
Kelly
Response:

Backyard Rinks

BY: kpark
Sep 27th, 2012 @ 9:42AM


Hey guys,
Is anyone else looking to build a backyard rink this winter? I ordered a rink liner from an awesome company called Nice Rink and was going to do the same this year, but realized we could probably save a bunch on shipping if we ordered multiple liners or products and had them all shipped to the same place.

If you\'re interested let me know.

Secondly, I have a liner from last year that was 32 x 55. Still holds water and is in great condition, but it would probably need to be cut down to 25 x 45. If anyone is interested, it\'s free.

Kelly
Response:

Ibex Tent Sale - Workers Needed

BY: kpark
Oct 1st, 2012 @ 10:42AM


Hey guys,
My company, Ibex, is holding our annual tent sale this week and we need some volunteers. We\'ll pay in trade, I think it\'s like $10 / hour towards Ibex gear. We really need people to help out on Friday & Saturday morning. If you agree to help you get free access to our Thursday night Early Bird Event.

If you\'re interested, please email me at kpark@ibex.com.
Response:

Welcome

BY: JTStally
Oct 10th, 2012 @ 10:20AM


I'm excited to be the team that welcomes Cardigan to the league. I'm expecting big things, especially because all anyone talks about in the Upper Valley is how good Ryan Sinclair is...considering he's the only guy currently rostered on their team page, he better be REALLY good, haha!
Response:

What, no trash talk?

BY: hkydoc
Oct 16th, 2012 @ 7:45PM


Seriously? Not one person bothered to post some pre-game shit talk? Alrighty... here goes...

The Gamblers are going to lose 5-4 and will be sporting a record of 3 losses in their last 4 games. Boo-yah! Chew on THAT for a while why don't cha? Willy's gonna hit the post in the final 30 seconds, implode, and then the Nords will storm back and score the GWG as The Nightmare Scoreth off a juicy rebound!!!
Response:

Welcome, Cardigan!

BY: hkydoc
Oct 16th, 2012 @ 7:47PM


Nice to have many of you guys back in the league! It's about fuckin' time, eh. I hope you have a fun first night playing the Whalen Cup Champs.

McD
Response:

Flip a coin...

BY: hkydoc
Oct 16th, 2012 @ 7:48PM


Good luck to both squads in their first game. Who knows what to expect? All Iknow is that you'd better get your asses to Bentley's post-game because it's hockey night, baby!

McD
Response:

FUCK, YEAH!

BY: hkydoc
Oct 17th, 2012 @ 3:14AM


Who called it? MOI, merci beaucoup!

What a great fucking hockey game between us and the Gamblers tonight. That's the way hockey should be every Tuesday night, eh! Fast, hard, a little edgy, great defense, great goaltending, lots of chances at both ends, no penalties (they called it consistently, that's for sure), and a close game that could have gone either way.

We, the Nords, needed that to start the season off strong against a juggernaut opponent that has owned us for 3 years. We are the Gamblers' bitch no more! (at least for 5 more weeke, eh.)

Look out next week, cuz the Gamblers have lost 3 of their last 4, and Willy will get the troops rallied and ready for the 23rd... so be ready.

Great game to all on both teams tonight.

McD
Response:

Hell Yeah

BY: kpark
Oct 17th, 2012 @ 9:04PM


Agreed 100%. That was a great game from start to finish. I always love playing the Gamblers, but definitely enjoyed the win more than previous games.

Are the Gamblers losing their edge? Losing 3 of their last 4?
Response:

Great League This Year!

BY: JTStally
Oct 19th, 2012 @ 9:25AM


It was definitely a solid game. We caved a little there late, but it was two even teams and I'm very excited about how competitive the league is going to be this year! Each week looks like it's shaping up to be anybody's game.
Response:

Wow!

BY: JTStally
Oct 19th, 2012 @ 9:26AM


I'm surprised by this result. It sounds like JT played out of his mind, which is really the only way to beat the Gamblers.
Response:

Are you fucking kidding me?

BY: hkydoc
Oct 20th, 2012 @ 2:01PM


MIKE DEVINE? In net for Tuck this season? We used to have Dartmouth season tickets when Mikey was in net and he was brilliant then. I hope he got as fat as me after he graduated! (evil laugh) If not, then I guess I'm gonna go another 60 men's league games without a goal... :(

McD
Response:

???

BY: The Dark Canuck
Oct 21st, 2012 @ 12:59PM


I say bring it on McD...The challenge excites me, so much in fact I think it moved. Kinda like the way you "chomp at the bit" when you hear someone has back pain? Yeah, I like the satisfaction of scoring on a good goalie, now all I have to do is shoot the frickin puck!
Response:

Somebody's Starting 0-2

BY: JTStally
Oct 23rd, 2012 @ 9:06AM


...Hope it's not us.
Response:

Ugh...

BY: JTStally
Oct 24th, 2012 @ 10:24AM


The second game in a row we've dug ourselves into a three-goal hole early in the first period. Oh well, it was still a fun game and it should continue to be a good rivalry between the two teams.
Response:

Yeah, sorry...

BY: hkydoc
Oct 25th, 2012 @ 8:35PM


The only time I will vote for a POW in a game involving Dead River is if the player is from Dead River! Now, I'm not sayin' that I could go out and score 4 or 5 points against ANY team that is above 12 year old girls, but I don't think having a scorefest against DR last season or this season would trump another POW nod on the same night while DR is in a rebuilding year.

McD
Response:

Good game, Tuck.

BY: hkydoc
Oct 25th, 2012 @ 8:46PM


This bunch of "hillbillies" kept it close and handed you guys the game late in a very competitive, hard fought, and solid contest. Nice job on starting the season 2-0.

Harrington - I STILL don't know HOW you scored two of those fucking goals!!! And I want that 1-on-1 back when I tripped over my own skates mesmerized at your speed... Nice game, eh.

McD
Response:

Looking Forward to it.

BY: kpark
Oct 29th, 2012 @ 10:30PM


I've been looking forward to this game for months now. Glad to have Ryan "Chicklets" Sinclair back in the UVie.

We're going to have our hands full with with their offense.

Go Nords!
Response:

So excited...

BY: hkydoc
Oct 30th, 2012 @ 6:51PM


...to have Cardigan join the UVie and up the level of play for all of us old has-beens!

McD
Response:

No matter who wins

BY: hkydoc
Oct 30th, 2012 @ 6:52PM


I'll see you guys at Bentley's post-game, eh!

McD
Response:

Pre Game Write Up

BY: P"nut"
Oct 31st, 2012 @ 2:43PM


Pre Game Write Up was right on. All except the outcome! Way to go Nords.

Response:

Looking forward to it!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 6th, 2012 @ 6:01PM


I want the challenge tonight and am psyched for this game. We're gonna have 3 D, so I hope I don't puke up a lung!

McD

P.S. No matter what, I hope we get a good showing at the bar post-game, eh. There was a sighting of two Dead River players there last week, in fact!
Response:

BY: Ozzy
Nov 7th, 2012 @ 12:09AM


6-3, way to call it Kelly...just kidding, thanks again for letting me play.
Response:

WTF, Park?

BY: hkydoc
Nov 13th, 2012 @ 7:28PM


Speak for yourself, eh! That's "McPylon" you non-spellcheck bastard!

GO NORDS!

McD
Response:

Cardigan POST-GAME

BY: hkydoc
Nov 13th, 2012 @ 7:32PM


Guys:

Just saw that Applebee\'s in W. Leb is now open until MIDNIGHT every day of the week, so that might be the ideal place for post-game libations after games at Cardigan, eh! They just did a nice renovation, the bar stools are comfy, they have half price appetizers after 9:00, and oh, yeah, BEER.

See you on the ice,

McD
Response:

My only regret...

BY: hkydoc
Nov 13th, 2012 @ 7:33PM


...is that I can't watch part of this game before my game because it is all the way at Cardigan. Good luck to both teams, and to Sinc in his recovery on the knee injury I just ready about.

McD
Response:

Hey, Gamblers!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 13th, 2012 @ 7:36PM


Be gentle on Dead River. I know you're cranky, but you had a good win at Cardigan last week, so keep it gentlemanly, eh.

DR - this game will show you what potential you have to play to, so watch and learn, and start to become a team with a team game so you can compete in a fucking solid adult league.

McD
Response:

B-League Openings?

BY: JTStally
Nov 14th, 2012 @ 3:39PM


The Whalers are 0-2 in games I play and 3-0 in games I don\'t. Looks like I might be handed a one-way bus ticket to the minors when I show up next Tuesday.
Response:

Hmmmm....

BY: kpark
Nov 16th, 2012 @ 2:38PM


Stally, I'm not going to lie. You're making a pretty good case against yourself. Kenny actually reached out to me, asked me to notify you that you've been sent down to the B League. If any injuries occur, you'll be #7 on that team to get the call back up to the big leagues!

KP
Response:

BY: Ozzy
Nov 27th, 2012 @ 4:41PM


Stally, B league rosters are pretty full, but I hear the Vermont Tech team in the C league may need someone to round out the 4th defensive pair
Response:

Did Kelly and I really suck that bad?

BY: hkydoc
Nov 18th, 2012 @ 3:10PM


YES!

McD
Response:

Ouch, Park.

BY: hkydoc
Nov 20th, 2012 @ 6:49PM


Hasn't anyone told you that words hurt? You could have been somewhat nice and said 7-2 with us on the ice, but NO, you just HAD to go into double digits... Now I have a complex. I'm going to eat my emotions... Wait - I've already been doing that!

McD
Response:

Have fun on the road, eh!

BY: hkydoc
Nov 20th, 2012 @ 6:51PM


Enjoy your trip out to Cardigan, Whalers! Let us know where to go post-game and what's good for next week.

McD
Response:

Stop showing off, Harrington.

BY: hkydoc
Nov 20th, 2012 @ 6:51PM


Oh, wait... this is the A-league. Please continue!

McD
Response:

Recap

BY: kirt
Nov 24th, 2012 @ 8:25PM


Whaler report: we had 10 skaters to Card's 6. Whalers netted a few early on and despite the skater advantage managed to just hold on rather than extend. Ken had a great night, and big Joe was strong at both ends. Good play all around -- especially a potential game changing backhand goal by the lone female Cardigan player late in the third. No post game activities to report.

KJ
Response:

Scorekeepers Needed

BY: kpark
Nov 27th, 2012 @ 8:43AM


Hey guys, we are looking for a scorekeeper at our Cardigan games. 1 Game a week, 8:30pm at Cardigan, $25.

We will also need a new scorekeeper in Woodstock starting in January since our current scorekeeper will be moving. Same price, $50 a night for the 2 games.

If you\'re interested or know of someone who would be interested, please email me at kpark@uvhl.com.

Thanks,
Kelly
Response:

Rivalry Renewed

BY: JTStally
Nov 27th, 2012 @ 8:55AM


This one is always fun! I'm looking forward to it.
Response:

Fun.

BY: kpark
Nov 27th, 2012 @ 4:24PM


This should be a great game. Hopefully Tuck has their full squad.
Response:

I'm gonna be OK

BY: Ozzy
Dec 5th, 2012 @ 10:29AM


I went to planned parenthood this morning for a rape kit, they said I don't need to worry since pucks are made of rubber like condoms I can't get pregnant from them penetrating my holes
Response:

Approaching Record Lows

BY: JTStally
Dec 6th, 2012 @ 2:09PM


I haven't heard of a performance that bad since Dave Reece gave up 11 goals and 10 points to Darryl Sittler in 1976. Unfortunately, unlike that night, there wasn't a Park in the building this past Tuesday; it would have created some nice symmetry.
Response:

ahahahahahah

BY: kpark
Dec 10th, 2012 @ 10:16PM


BRILLIANT STALLY! BRILLIANT!
Response:

Fun Game

BY: JTStally
Dec 13th, 2012 @ 9:22AM


That was a great game between two good teams. I hope Mike Devine's neck is ok after standing on his head like he did, that was a very solid showing from him.
Response:

DR Where\'s Osama Bin Feiden

BY: rgrunds
Dec 14th, 2012 @ 6:25PM


when you need him?


Response:

No write up? Cardigan beat Gamblers

BY: rgrunds
Dec 17th, 2012 @ 11:21AM


Kelly, clean the smegma from your ears and get on it.
Response:

Grundy!

BY: hkydoc
Dec 22nd, 2012 @ 9:36PM


Nice to hear form you on the UVHL Forum again! We had wondered a mere week or two ago if you were still around. I hope all is well, oh protector of the crease, and lone independent ball buster of the UVie!

Happy holidays, eh.

McD
Response:

Have a good holiday

BY: rgrunds
Dec 23rd, 2012 @ 9:35AM


Shawn, my negro, nice to hear from you. Gotta play at Jackson arena in Stowe tonight. Hate it intensely. The rink is partially open. Goalies are subject to foot gangrene and other circulations damage.

Almost played for you guys. DR needed a replacement, but I was in Cleveland wearing my "Jewish attorney member of the World Conspiracy to Control International Finance and deflower Christian Virgins".

It's so nice to belong.

Can you punch Kelly in the noogies until he posts the scores from the past week?
Response:

Grrrrrrrrundle!!!!!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 23rd, 2012 @ 4:36PM


It's a good thing you DIDN'T play for DR... You d likely have blamed 8 of the 12 goals scored on your D, torn a labia in the first period, and shamefully pimped yourself out for cheeseburgers in the parking lot
Response:

Grrrrrrrrundle!!!!!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 23rd, 2012 @ 4:36PM


It's a good thing you DIDN'T play for DR... You d likely have blamed 8 of the 12 goals scored on your D, torn a labia in the first period, and shamefully pimped yourself out for cheeseburgers in the parking lot
Response:

Everything is YOUR fault

BY: rgrunds
Dec 23rd, 2012 @ 10:52PM


It's so nice to be noticed.
Response:

and

BY: rgrunds
Dec 23rd, 2012 @ 10:52PM


I like cheeseburgers.
Response:

jeeez

BY: The Dark Canuck
Dec 18th, 2012 @ 3:43PM


What was that Parky? Motivation? It would be nice to light it up tonight for the team..I DO need to catch up in the goals dept. What better night than the game b4 Christmas?
LALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALLALallier!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Response:

Is Hadley's Dong still festering?

BY: rgrunds
Dec 18th, 2012 @ 4:05PM


Jesus. It's the 21st century. They have stuff for that.
Response:

Big game tonight!

BY: kpark
Dec 18th, 2012 @ 4:57PM


This should be a great game to play in. I'm looking forward to it!
Response:

Marsh

BY: rgrunds
Dec 26th, 2012 @ 8:18PM


Sorry to hear about your Dad.
Response:

FInal Score

BY: JTStally
Jan 6th, 2013 @ 7:23PM


The final score of this game was 8-7 in a shootout, not 9-7. Cardigan won the shootout 2-0, but it did end in a shootout, so it was only worth one goal.
Response:

Meyer

BY: JTStally
Jan 11th, 2013 @ 8:56AM


I hope Will is ok. It's never fun to see someone leave mid-game with an injury.
Response:

Good luck tonight, boys.

BY: hkydoc
Jan 15th, 2013 @ 4:38PM


Sorry I hafta miss out on the action. Should be ready for next week. GO NORDS!

McD

P.S. I hope your knee is doing better, Sinc, and that you're back on the ice soon, eh.
Response:

POW

BY: JTStally
Jan 16th, 2013 @ 11:09AM


No need waste time with a poll this week, Parky. I'd say we can give the Player of the Week unanimously to Devine. A 46-save shutout!? Wow.
Response:

BY: voyer
Jan 16th, 2013 @ 7:10PM


Kelley,
You got the 4 right for the Tuckies, but the Gamblers forgot to bring their 5. Devine was just that, but the future high priced consultants played a good team game.
Response:

Devine For President

BY: kpark
Jan 17th, 2013 @ 10:15PM


There is only one option for POW this week. Devine was outstanding. Tuck also played a pretty solid game as a whole, even without Harrington.

Response:

O.A.R. & Yukon Cornelius @ Okemo - March 16th

BY: kpark
Jan 18th, 2013 @ 10:13AM


Hey guys,
One of our UVHL Players, Poli \"The Nightmare\" Nightengale, wanted to extend a special promotion to a killer event at Okemo in March. Performances by O.A.R. & Yukon Kornelius plus all the benefits below. Details in the flyer below.

Thanks,
Kelly


Response:

Zanleoni Suspension

BY: JTStally
Jan 31st, 2013 @ 9:50PM


The suspension to Jay Zanleoni has been excessive and unfair to both him and the rest of the Whalers team, and I\'d like to ask for an explanation as to why he has been required to sit out the last three games.

Jay did the appropriate thing in coming forward and stating that he went hard on the play that injured Will Meyer and took responsibility for his actions. The play itself was a hockey play. It happened in the course of the action, and I saw it in the offensive zone as I manned the blue line. It was not penalized, nor did it strike me at the time as something that clearly needed to be. However, it still resulted in an injury to Meyer, and all of us understood the fairness of a short suspension for the sake of keeping the league clean. However, three games has been far too long for such a play.

As an example, I like playing against Marshy. He\'s a guy that puts forth the effort every game and brings a good, upbeat, competitive attitude that fits the concept of men\'s league hockey. I\'ll use him as an example, however, because he\'s a bigger, stronger player that goes hard. If a similar play happened where he crashed into me behind the net and I suffered an injury, I wouldn\'t think he\'d be suspended for three games.

There are a few factors that contribute to this.

- The first is that Meyer is one of the league\'s best players and I\'m just some average guy. It seems to me that by taking a stand on an injury to one of the best players in the league, it\'s designed to make a point that it\'s never ok to take a shot at another team\'s best player. That\'s not to suggest that Jay did such a thing, and this never seems to be a problem due to the integrity with which UVHL players approach the game. However, I think that an injury to me could be easily swept under the rug since I\'m a relative no-namer, and that Jay was penalized for the quality of the player that was injured, not the play itself.

- The second factor that contributed to this is that the Whalers have the image of a happy-go-lucky team and we haven\'t spoken up. You needn\'t watch more than the first 60 seconds of the Nordiques-Whalers game on Tuesday to realize that if a Nord got suspended, the team would have chirped and complained until their player was put back on the ice. We, the Whalers, have accepted this suspension for three games with relatively little feedback, and it\'s time that someone on our team speak up and request an explanation.

I won\'t blame either of the two recent Whalers losses solely on Jay\'s absence. However, he shows up every single week and is a big contributor to the team. It was evident in the way we lost momentum on Tuesday with five forwards and three defensemen that an additional skater, especially of his caliber, would have helped our performance.

We\'ve sat quiet for three weeks and tried to let this play its course, but by this past game, the suspension became something that seemed excessive and unfair, not just to the player or the team, but the league as a whole. We deserve an explanation as to why the suspension was so harsh, and I hope that such criteria will be noted for any future reference (although I hope we have no similar such instances).

Should a similar instance ever arise, it would make a lot more sense to determine the suspension before the following week\'s games are played. This one has seemed to be off-the-cuff and loosely based on whether Meyer has been healthy enough to play, which he has not. (Let\'s say a player breaks a bone on a questionable play and misses two months. I can\'t see it happening that the player that hurt him misses all that time as well.)

I\'ll close be wishing Will the best. I enjoy playing against him, and I hope he is close to returning. Head injures aren\'t something to be taken lightly, and I know everyone on our team, especially Jay, was disappointed to find out he\'d gotten hurt.

Thanks,
Stally
Response:

Awful

BY: kpark
Jan 31st, 2013 @ 11:15PM


Get all of your information before you start running your mouth here. It's not as cut and dry as you think, and you're assumptions that the league won't protect you because you are not an "elite" player are absurd and honestly fucking insulting.

I'll gladly contribute more information to this story in the morning.
Response:

Thank You

BY: JTStally
Feb 1st, 2013 @ 12:14AM


I would very much appreciate more information to help us all understand how the incident has been addressed and how it's being resolved. I'd also prefer that profanity not be used, as it only detracts from a serious discussion.

I enjoy our league very much, because the teams tend to play a respectful game. My hope is that by gaining an understanding of the incident, we can help avoid another such one in the future by creating a sense of consequences for a player's actions.
Response:

BY: PMayhew
Feb 1st, 2013 @ 9:13AM


Here are the facts, this was Kelly's email to the captains after this happened:

Captains,
Just a heads up that the league will be suspending the Whaler's Jay Zanleoni for for an undetermined amount of time for an incident that occurred last week against the Gamblers. The incident occurred as Zanleoni & Meyer were criss-crossing behind the net, Zanleoni reached out to get a piece of Meyer to slow him down despite the fact that he didn't have the puck. The contact resulted in a concussion for Meyer who will be missing at least this week. Now this is the tricky part, neither referee nor myself saw the incident and Meyer doesn't totally recollect the contact but feels it must have been an elbow since he is significantly smaller than Zanleoni. Now wait, it gets even more interesting that Zanleoni reached out to Meyer and apologized, then sent me an email saying that he leaned into Meyer with the sole purpose of giving him a bump to slow him down but knows he was wrong and accepts a suspension.

As the commissioner, this would have been a play that I couldn't suspend for since we haven't installed our instant replay streaming yet and since both referees missed the play. Zanleoni's transparency is greatly appreciated, seeing as I think most guys would either deny the incident or push it under the rug. That being said, Meyer wasn't able to work the next day and will miss some time on the ice and these are the types of things that I do NOT want to happen in the UVHL.

Zanleoni suggested that I suspend him for the length of Will's injury plus one game. I think that is a fair ruling, but I would also like to%u2026not reward, but show the league's appreciation for Zanleoni's transparency on the issue. I truly believe that, while Zanleoni pushes the envelope on the ice, there was no malicious intent to inflict damage or pain on Meyer but to get under his skin and slow him down. So a suspension to injury is the ruling that I have come to. If you have any thoughts or issues, please feel free to let me know.

Zanleoni is now on the books and is being warned to cut the bullshit, a second offense will not be tolerated.

Thanks,
Kelly


As you can see he mentions nothing about Will being one of the better players in the league. Kelly also left this open for feedback from all captains. I agree that with a long-term injury, this type of suspension would not work (and with a head injury nobody knows how long it will be). When we were talking about the suspension, I don't think that any of us thought it would be longer than 3 games. As with anything, you have to put yourself in Kelly's shoes when making these decisions. There is always two sides to every story and it is hard to have a suspension system set in stone as there are too many variables. Maybe we should have Kelly make a Brendan Shanahan video explaining his thought process....
Response:

BY: Z-Skate
Feb 1st, 2013 @ 9:38AM


First and foremost, I will admit that I play on or near the edge and try to bother/frustrate folks on the ice.

The play with Will never had any malicious intent. I was trying to get in his way and slow him down, as I often do with him. That being said no one (outside of Will) feels worse about the resulting injury than I.

In the subsequent days after the incident, I reached out to Park to discuss the play and a suspension. The suspension that was handed down was more my doing than Park%u2019s.. as detailed above.
Response:

That's it

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 1st, 2013 @ 4:30PM


I'm suspending myself for NOT taking your head off behind the net Stally...
Response:

Thanks, Everyone

BY: JTStally
Feb 2nd, 2013 @ 7:02PM


I appreciate Pierce sharing his insight. While I don't expect Parky to share the extent of his email with the whole league, I think a small recap of how the incident was handled and when we could expect Jay back would have been helpful for me. It was mentioned in the Gamblers-Whalers recap, but left the suspension length open, which caused my eventual frustration. The unpredictability of concussion length certainly didn't help anything for anyone. As I said, I hope to see Will out there again soon ... despite how much of a pain he is to try to defend, ha ha!

In regards to the actual play, I did see it, although the contact happened behind the net, so the action of it was obstructed. It didn't strike me as blatantly malicious, and I think that's why the refs didn't whistle it for a penalty. When I asked Marrazzo what happened to Will and he said a concussion, I didn't immediately think of that play, so it's understandable that it didn't stand out to them at the time it happened. As we know, they have a lot to pay attention to at one time. It doesn't change the fact Will got hurt on a play that didn't need to happen and deserved a penalty, but Jay certainly didn't go in with those intentions.

Marshy, I'll keep my head up on the breakout next time we play you guys, lol. Thanks again to everyone for helping to clarify this issue.

-Stally
Response:

Thanks Pierce

BY: kpark
Feb 1st, 2013 @ 9:31AM


Pierce, thank you for posting that. I was trying to keep the suspension a little bit low key out of respect for Jay's transparency.

Stally, please review the Player Conduct page which was posted over the Summer I Believe and is a link at the bottom of every page.

Player Conduct
Response:

Over/Under Four Goals?

BY: JTStally
Feb 5th, 2013 @ 1:40PM


That would be quite the men's league goaltending exhibition for the ages!

Interesting to see that despite how good the Gamblers are each season that the Nords will be close to overtaking them with a win. There's a lot of parity in the league this year.
Response:

Speaking of Over/Under...

BY: JTStally
Feb 6th, 2013 @ 11:01AM


While it seemed high, the 15 goals on this one wasn't even close to being excessive as it was surpassed by the midway point of the game.

I was the dope that missed the memo about the game time being at 8, and not 8:30 like it was earlier in the season. When I stepped on the ice early in the second is was already 6-5. Perhaps I could have helped keep a goal or two out, but let's be honest, I probably wouldn't have done much for my own team's offensive efforts, so it was likely a wash on the scoreboard. Both teams will need to reconsider the defensive approach going forward, haha.
Response:

BY: Ozzy
Feb 8th, 2013 @ 9:32AM


And your team will need to consider buying you a watch and/or a day planner.
Response:

Dear Commissioners (Kelly, Shawn, invisible JT)

BY: rgrunds
Feb 14th, 2013 @ 9:58AM


Why is 10-5 a "barn burner" and 9-5 a "defensive gem". Were there 4 empty netters in the 9-5 game? Did Whalie pull it's goalie (the noble and intrepid K Lallier) for an entire period.


I think JT has been touching himself too much. That is the only way to account for this.

Response:

Huh?

BY: kpark
Feb 15th, 2013 @ 6:44AM


Grundy, first off...I have no idea what games you are referring to. Secondly, I feel as if you may have missed the sarcasm in a statement like "defensive gem" when referring to a high scoring game.


sar·casm

/sär,kaz∂m/


Noun

The use of irony to mock or convey contempt.


Synonyms

irony

Response:

ow

BY: rgrunds
Feb 15th, 2013 @ 7:56AM


you yelled at me.
Response:

Just thinking...

BY: Z-Skate
Mar 19th, 2013 @ 12:01PM


Shouldn’t Tuck and Cardigan each get one win over the past two weeks? Which would put the Nords in fourth place with no shot at securing third and having to face the Whale in the first round of the playoffs.

I am guessing, the commissioners (who happen to be all on the Nords) got together and came up with this idea so they wouldn’t get knocked out of the playoffs in the first round, yet again.

Cheers.
Response:

You shouldn't think...

BY: kpark
Mar 19th, 2013 @ 12:08PM


Z, you shouldn't think...it's not your strong suit and you may hurt yourself. Honestly, if I had kept the games the way they were, both Cardigan & Tuck would have losses / forfeits in the last two weeks anyways, so by moving them to face each other and allowing the other teams to have actual games it was a win / win for everyone.

In all reality, it doesn't really matter, everyone makes the playoffs and I have a feeling that you would rather face Cardigan than the Nordiques and that is why you're making the stink.

I'd love to knock the reigning champs out of the playoffs in the first round.

KP
Response:

Same Question

BY: JTStally
Mar 19th, 2013 @ 3:14PM


I was actually curious about this as well, because Cardigan was scored with 25 points after last week and now only has 23, so there was an adjustment. I personally don't care either way, and I know that Kenny thought it odd that the teams got a point despite not showing up. So, while I hate to speak for him, I would think our team captain would favor the adjustment.

In the case of the Whale, we're fifth place regardless. I'd prefer to play the Nords and skip Carpino in the first round, but both the teams would provide strong challenges, and we'd have to play well to beat either. The issue that doesn't affect the Whale is that the third-place team gets a far easier game against Dead River.

As I've said, I don't care either way on the rule, but considering Tuck and Cardigan had each been carrying a point for a forfeit tie since late Decemeber, the final week adjustment was unexpected, even while being fair.
Response:

Forfeit = 0 points

BY: kpark
Mar 19th, 2013 @ 3:20PM


My take is that if a team has to forfeit due to the fact that they can not roster a team, why would they get to earn a point? They have forfeited. Cardigan & Tuck both knew that they would be forfeiting games while they were away, I just matched these teams up in order to make sure that we had 2 games last week & this week and guys were getting their moneys worth.
Response:

I Agree

BY: JTStally
Mar 19th, 2013 @ 3:31PM


Your reasoning makes sense: a team should have to show up to be eligible for a point.

The only confusion I had was that they were credited with the points in the standings, and then they taken away this week. It was always weird though, because the extra points were accrued from a mysterious column that wasn't even one of the three in the standings, so I agree that based on their listed record in games played, the teams have the correct amount of points.

One question for after tonight: do points or winning percentage take precedence? Cardigan has a 0.61% with 23 points. With a win tonight, the Nords will have 24 points but a 0.55%. I suppose if Cardigan's three forfeits were scored as Losses, they'd be 11-10-1, not 11-7-1, so that would leave them at 0.52%.
Response:

Wins vs Winning %

BY: kpark
Mar 19th, 2013 @ 3:40PM


We've always gone by points. I put in winning % a couple years ago when Tuck joined because someone requested it.

As for the added point that Cardigan & Tuck had, I had initially added Ties in there as an option for how a game could end but ties are just messy and don't make sense when people forfeit due to a lack of players. For example, earlier this season the Nordiques had to forfeit a game against Cardigan because we couldn't find a goalie. Same situation, where we could have just made it a tie for both teams or make it so the game didn't register, but since Cardigan could field a full team and the Nordiques couldn't, the win went to Cardigan.

If we were to really delve into this, we could say that the Nords & Dead River automatically get 2 points this week because our opponents(Tuck & Cardigan) couldn't field teams. Same thing goes with last week where Dead River & the Whalers could have both earned automatic wins but ended up playing each other.

It's all a shit show.
Response:

Ugh, Tuck

BY: JTStally
Mar 19th, 2013 @ 3:43PM


Silly business school kids with their percentages...

Sounds good to me. We all make the playoffs, and I agree that consolidating to two games the past two weeks was definitely a better choice than having two ready-to-play teams sit at home and earn forfeit wins against out-of-town opponents.
Response:

2nd rd??

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 22nd, 2013 @ 8:32PM


I'm hoping the Whale make the 2nd rd against us. And I also hope JZ keeps his distance from our net. Crashing into JT, the occasional stick to his head, back of the leg, "going hard to the net " " playing close to the edge" all characteristics of this guy's game. It pisses people off, but is likely effective. If I didn't think a lot of Kenny, and respected him as a person and as a player, is likely do a few of those things too. So, I guess we'll see which JZ shows up to play that night.
Response:

Unlikely...

BY: Z-Skate
Mar 22nd, 2013 @ 8:56PM


I'm touched you noticed Marshy.. And I guess your implying I have little to no respect for Turner..? Quite the opposite and I feel like the philosophical readings of the underwood have really been helping me find my calm place. I too hope the Whale make it past Cardigan and on to play Dead River.
Response:

Oooooh

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 23rd, 2013 @ 7:31AM


Implying DR is going to somehow win on Tues, only means one thing. You're breathing in more than zen readings. I guess after thinking about your response, I know players can be edgy on the ice, and a totally different guy off the ice. You likely fit that description, and I never intended that you had no respect for JT, I was bringing to light your love taps on JT. That's all it is, love for the game.
Response:

Playoff Seed Clarification

BY: JTStally
Mar 23rd, 2013 @ 9:01AM


Hey Guys,

I hate to rain on this whole second round smack talk that's going on, but just for clarification, the only way the Whalers play the Nordiques (or Dead River) in the playoffs would be if both advanced all the way to the championship.

The two teams that win their first round games will play the two bye teams in the second round. There's no way around that.

Thanks,
Stally
Response:

UVHL 2013-2014

BY: Z-Skate
Mar 25th, 2013 @ 3:52PM


Rumor is Cardigan is leaving... so are Brewers being reassembled and is its fearless leader coming back after his year-long suspension? Any thoughts on going from 6 to 4 or 5 teams - I would like to stay with 6 teams.
Response:

Six is Good

BY: JTStally
Mar 26th, 2013 @ 8:30AM


I like six. It was too bad DR struggled this season, but if we can get six competitive teams, that's much better than less.

I played in another league this winter with just four, and it feels like you're playing the same opponent almost every single week.
Response:

Game Time

BY: JTStally
Mar 26th, 2013 @ 8:25AM


I'm curious why this game got the late time after the exhibition. Was there a scheduling conflict on the Cardigan end? I would have preferred the earlier time, since it was available, but I assume there's an issue that I'm not aware of.

Thanks,
Stally
Response:

Spread

BY: JTStally
Mar 26th, 2013 @ 8:27AM


Dead River has been playing better hockey lately, but the Nords have been solidly going about their business all year. I'd definitely take them against the three-goal spread.
Response:

Preferred?

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 26th, 2013 @ 11:19AM


Maybe you guys should have finished higher than 5th place then Stally...The Gamblers and Tuck were given the option since they finished 1-2 and WE were given the option next, as we finshed in 3rd. Good luck tonight!
Response:

Finished?

BY: JTStally
Mar 26th, 2013 @ 11:53AM


"Finished in fifth place"?

We plan on finishing much higher than that by the time this is all said and done. If you want to set your sights on third, go right ahead.
Response:

no..

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 26th, 2013 @ 1:23PM


Finished the REGULAR season in 5th. Obviously...we would have loved to win most of our games this year, and finished first. But..we're happy with 3rd at the moment, and refining our game, and concentrating on D this week will get us ready to face our 2nd rd. opponent whoever it may be. The fact Cardigan may only have 6-7 guys play, might give you guys an edge going into tonight, but beyond that will have to be a miracle like last year. If we get beat by Tuck next week, we'll at least go down giving it our all...like I said, good luck...I mean that in the most sincere way Stally
Response:

Tuesday Night

BY: JTStally
Mar 27th, 2013 @ 11:48AM


It was too bad Cardigan wasn't able to get a full contingent out there, but the guys that showed definitely skated hard and it was a spirited scrimmage. While it might not have counted for standings, I was still disappointed we couldn't take the win.

Marshy, as far as the game time, I had always thought opening night of the playoffs went 3v6, 4v5, scrimmage. I might have confused that with the semifinals which are usually 1-seed, 2-seed, scrimmage, or perhaps it was just that way one year and I assumed that was the process.
Response:

BY: habman
Mar 28th, 2013 @ 2:04PM


Wow
Response:

Rough and Tumble

BY: JTStally
Mar 28th, 2013 @ 2:58PM


"Head Contact"
"Cross Checking"
"Boarding"
"Elbowing"

Sounds like there was no love lost between these long time rivals.
Response:

Not really

BY: kpark
Apr 1st, 2013 @ 12:31PM


It was actually a pretty clean game. The Elbowing call in OT was kind of weak, Charette "Boarding" me could have been a non-call and I would have been fine with it. We both were heading to the boards hard and fighting for position, He's a bit bigger than I am....so I lost that battle.

I didn't see Sprague's Head Contact, but I don't think it was bad either.

The game was pretty clean overall.

KP
Response:

Good Refereeing

BY: JTStally
Apr 2nd, 2013 @ 12:10AM


Well, then, props to Eddie for utilizing the various options available to him in the USA Hockey Rulebook. It was definitely more colorful than "Roughing, Interference, Interference, Roughing, Interference."
Response:

Boston Bruins trade for Jaromir Jagr!

BY: kpark
Apr 2nd, 2013 @ 2:49PM


Hell yeah!!!

http://m.tsn.ca/nhl/article?url=http%3A%2F%2Fbsympatico.vo.llnwd.net%2Fo35%2Ffeeds%2Fufs%2Fxml%2Ftsn_mobile%2Fnews%2Fnews_nhl.xml&itemId=419676&pageName=NHL&feedId=82008
Response:

Dead River Numbers

BY: JTStally
Apr 8th, 2013 @ 1:48PM


Is Dead River going to have a full contingent? I'm driving an hour each way to play, so if they do struggle filling out the roster, I hope some of the Nords will stick around so we can have a good game.
Response:

Yup

BY: kpark
Apr 8th, 2013 @ 2:24PM


Hadley promised me that they would have enough. Worst case scenario is that a couple guys from the previous game can stick around and play.

KP
Response:

BY: Ozzy
Apr 9th, 2013 @ 1:31PM


Hadley promised me dinner once after I bailed him out last minute once, I bet 3 players, a goalie and some hay bails w/ jerseys on taken from one of the mountains he skis at.
Response:

Wow... Tuck wins!

BY: hkydoc
Apr 10th, 2013 @ 1:34PM


They seemed to be the real deal right from the beginning of the season, and now they've proven it. I'm looking forward to the game write up - sorry I had to miss it. Congrats, eh!

McD
Response:

Pre-Season Skates

BY: kpark
Aug 6th, 2013 @ 7:49PM


Hey guys,
We\'ve got some pre-season skates set up at Campion Rink for the following Tuesdays at 9:20-10:20pm

Sep 17th
Sep 24th
Oct 1st
Oct 8th
Oct 15th

Pay for all 5 skates by September 1st and it\'s only $60. A la carte(per skate) is $15 each. If you are interested, let me know which skates you can make.

Email me at kpark@parkcreative.com

Thanks,
Kelly

Response:

Hockey pool? (aka Fantasy Draft)

BY: hkydoc
Aug 31st, 2013 @ 7:38AM


Are there any other UVHLers interested in doing a hockey pool with me this season? I can\'t make it back home to Ontario to do it with my buddies and I always enjoy the NHL season more when involved in a pool with bragging rights on the line. I\'d like to get about 10 guys and maybe we all throw in $50.00 each and do a draft at a local bar some night and have blast eating wings, drinking beer, and bathing in bleu cheese.

Who\'s comin\' with me?

McD
Response:

BY: habman
Sep 10th, 2013 @ 3:33PM


Any numbers yet? When does it start?
Response:

BY: hkydoc
Sep 13th, 2013 @ 4:26AM


You're the first to respond, so let's see if we can drum up more interest, The website will get more traffic as we get closer to October, too, and my team had a BBQ this Sat as well. I'll keep you up to date, eh.
Response:

Tonight..

BY: Z-Skate
Oct 22nd, 2013 @ 5:44AM


Yes, we are without Joe but rumor has it Mrs. LaPerle has added some muscle in the off season and is down to a BMI of 29.75%. Thanks, at least in part to preseason at altitude in Arizona where he asked the server to hold the pink umbrellas and loaded up on the guacamole. Yes, I would say he is primed for a break out season and will easily fill the shoes of our dearly departed JG.

Just received an email from Chuck, who's in Vegas, and has informed me the house has been swung and has the Whale a heavy favorite at 6.. due to:
1) LaPerle's Camp in AZ
2) Mr. Shaw was seen drinking the blood of a helpless fawn in the woods over the weekend. He was quoted in the Snooze as saying "road kill or not it's still a trophy on my wall"
3) Kirt spending the last 3 nights in Nick's man cave in Tunbridge learning the methods of the reclusive beast in preparation for a stint on O
4) Woody losing a member of the HHS hockey line of the century but gaining another in James Kerrigan
5) Dillan has promised his girlfriend he will stop shaving his legs and be the she-man she has dreamed off.. I would stay out of the corners if I were you.
6) Kenny.. he was busy plugging holes at the Q-Club so Vegas is assuming the 5-hole will be plugged as well. Now if we can only do something about the "ducking"
7) Stally b/c he will bring the talent (from fucking Concord, NH - crazy?) that raised numerous titles on the west coast for the once prestigious USC.
8) Dad has said no more cross ice passes in the d-zone... ya right.
9) Z - If I can get over the excitement of being able to stick Turner in the mask, Park in the Nuts (not McD b/c he gets too excited) and Alex with a cross-check from behind in to the net.. I may actually be an offensive threat b/c "Gord" (Yes, I looked up to him and said oh man) knows I'm anything but defensive.
10) Tomahawk b/c he is well the tomahawk riding a single ring around Asctuney all summer.

In all honesty.. it should be a good game. See everyone on the ice.
Response:

I LOVE IT!

BY: kpark
Oct 22nd, 2013 @ 6:08AM


Z, you may have just swung my vote. I'm picking Whalers all the way.

KP


Response:

Who broke the news to Devine?

BY: McG
Oct 22nd, 2013 @ 6:39AM


Tough break -- is Yacey flying in to make his start?
Response:

Whaddya mean you "Couldn't care less", Z?

BY: hkydoc
Oct 22nd, 2013 @ 7:49AM


That sounds like a pre-season rant of excitement from one who proclaims over and over he doesn't care about hockey anymore. Yeah, your secret is officially out hockey-lover.

Aside from that, it was fucking hilarious! Nice to see someone contributing to the banter and getting us all worked up for yet another great season of the best men's league hockey ever! YAAAAAAAAAH! GO, NORDS!!!

McD

P.S. How did you know I get aroused when I get sticked in the balls? Some funny things happened to my body post-surgery...

P.P.S. My money is on Marshy to strike first tonight - I got him REALLY pissed off so he's gonna be playing angry for once, and might even backcheck. Watch out for the big one-timer!
Response:

The Legacy Continues

BY: JTStally
Oct 22nd, 2013 @ 8:09AM


No worries, we kept our Marauder count up by adding Kerrigan. I'm pretty sure if he thought the Nords were a better team, he would haven't jumped ship for the Whale. #JustSayin

...And, McD, let's not get carried away and make outlandish comments, like insinuating that Marshy even has a conceptual understanding for this "backchecking" fad.
Response:

Caring about hockey...

BY: Z-Skate
Oct 22nd, 2013 @ 9:06AM


McD I have never said I didn't care; however what I do say and continue to stand by is that if I never played hockey again.. I'd be okay. I don't miss it or yearn for it but I would miss the locker room banter!!

I can only imagine what you just told Marshy - Some opinions are better left unsaid or said once and left alone.

Also no grabbing the Tragically Hip reference in "Looked up to the Gord (lord) above and said hey man thanks".. You're such a poser?

You eat the cheese out of women's toes.. getting stuck in the balls is probably some sort of foreplay in your world.
Response:

Only clean, pretty toes, Z...

BY: hkydoc
Oct 22nd, 2013 @ 11:11AM


I did appreciate the Hip reference, though, regardless of it being confusing and inaccurately typed (Oh man vs Hey man), but thanks for explaining it to me.

Yeah, the locker room banter is half of it, and the post-game beers the other half... and the hockey is the other, other half... I guess that makes three halves, or periods, in Canadian math, eh.

See you on the ice! YAAAAAH!

McD
Response:

JT. That Looks Painful

BY: rgrunds
Nov 6th, 2013 @ 3:15PM


Wow. Can I get you a warm drink? It was Marshy\'s fault...yeah..

peaceniggaout.
Response:

Yup...

BY: kpark
Nov 6th, 2013 @ 8:21PM


Yeah, that absolutely sucked.
Response:

jeez Grundy

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 19th, 2013 @ 12:42PM


you emerge after how many months of absence...only to blame ME for the ass-whooping? it was DEF a collective lack of efforton our side. An amazing goalie, and wayy more effort and speed on the Tuck squad...a reality check for the Nords really...but thanks for breaking my balls Grundy...assholio
Response:

big boy

BY: rgrunds
Nov 19th, 2013 @ 12:47PM


have good holidays. And remember, warm ups are just a Jewish trick to accumulate pucks for resale.
Response:

JT's Right

BY: rgrunds
Nov 7th, 2013 @ 8:22PM


You don't need warmups. They're just a Jewish Trick.

Response:

Ok...seriously

BY: stu1848
Nov 19th, 2013 @ 7:27AM


Do I think we're as rough as the "game report" suggests, absolutely not. Yes, my new team, thanks for asking, has some rust around the edges; however, the chassis is strong and the engine just had an oil change. In other words, our boys (and girl) have taken the week to get lines sorted and attitudes mended. We're ready for a well-played battle with the dreaded Gamblers, who may, as the league picks suggest, have over estimated their value.

Let's bring it, gentlemen!


Response:

Seriously, though

BY: JTStally
Nov 22nd, 2013 @ 10:02AM


A member of the Nords writes the pre-game report. Take it up with him. #JustSayin
Response:

Ouch..

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 22nd, 2013 @ 10:25AM


that hurt Stally...I over-thought that one for sure...all I was thinking was putting that puck right through the net...It's common knowledge that Kelly does the pre-game write-ups...no need to take anything up with him, I whiffed it...I'm sure you woulda buried it tho right?
Response:

Ray Charles

BY: JTStally
Nov 22nd, 2013 @ 3:13PM


...could have seen a slap shot was coming on that one, and honestly might have stopped it too :)

Me? I usually bury a double-deek backhand, but I never get the chance to try it out anymore. Whatever, it only works once per goalie, so we'll see if I ever get to put that one past J.T.


As far as the write up, that was reference to a separate comment where one of the Nords (Stu1848) was countering what Parky had written about the team. I was merely pointing out that the write-up was written by a fellow Nord.
Response:

agreed

BY: The Dark Canuck
Nov 19th, 2013 @ 10:56AM


I'm hoping we have a MUCH better showing than last game...that was brutal. It'll be nice to put a few in the net tonight...
Response:

BY: habman
Nov 20th, 2013 @ 12:18PM


You'll get'em next time.
Response:

Butterflies

BY: JTStally
Nov 22nd, 2013 @ 10:02AM


Maybe...so long as he doesn't whiff on another penalty shot.
Response:

Fundamentals

BY: stu1848
Nov 25th, 2013 @ 7:09AM


I had a coach once say to me, "Young man, if you ever hope to make it in this game, you have to keep your head up and believe, in your heart, that you can do anything on the ice."

To which I said, "But, did you see the size of that left wing".

His reply, "C'mon! Skate like you mean it, every shift, and the rest will sort itself out!"

In the movie "Trouble with the Curve", a coach says to his team before the first pitch..."ok boys, don't suck today!"

'nough said...don't you think!?
Response:

Hey Kelly

BY: bubba
Dec 10th, 2013 @ 10:32AM


Chicks dig goals
Response:

Ha ha ha!

BY: kpark
Dec 10th, 2013 @ 3:22PM


Bubba, I was just checking to see if you actually read these things! Good luck tonight score some goals for the ladies.
Response:

CHaD Fundraiser

BY: kpark
Dec 13th, 2013 @ 11:51AM


Hey guys, the email below is from a UVHL Alumni who is looking for some fundraising help for CHaD. Ian Gill will be playing in the Battle of the Badges game in March and is looking for support & donations. It\'s a great cause. Individual donations are great, or if a team wants to collect and donate as a group that will also work. Spread the word! Thanks, Kelly

Hi everyone,

As some of you know I am playing the in the CHaD Battle of the Badges hockey game (Fire vs Police) at the Verizon Wireless Arena in Manchester NH March 1st. This fundraising event for CHaD (Children’s Hospital at Dartmouth) is one of their largest events of the year. I will be playing for Team Fire and it is the responsibility of each player to raise money that will go directly to CHaD.

CHaD uses these funds to help pay for birthday parties, holiday parties, toys, and simple quality of life items for the children and their families who are staying at CHaD while they battle their illnesses. This is a huge event for an amazing cause. Please click on the links below to see what CHaD is all about and to donate.

Thank you!

CHaD “Roar” Video
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lnG3MKos87A

My donation page
http://www.kintera.org/faf/donorReg/donorPledge.asp?ievent=1086001&lis=1&kntae1086001=B29384259EC04E8FA4C4E22E82FEDC11&supId=396709150
Response:

Thanks for the heads up

BY: JTStally
Jan 8th, 2014 @ 10:09AM


I chipped in $25 in support of the UVHL. I hope others have done the same. CHaD does great things for our community.
Response:

Anyone else rusty after the holidays?

BY: hkydoc
Jan 7th, 2014 @ 9:39AM


I felt like a beginner this morning at the 7:30AM Campion skate today! The first 3 shifts were like I hadn\'t skated at all this season. Luckily, the motor programs are well ingrained and it didn\'t take too long, but the cobwebs were still coming out late in the skate. I have a feeling the games tonight will be off to a somewhat slow start before the gravy, cheese, and desserts are fully out of our systems. Regardless, I LOVE HOCKEY! YAAAAH!

McD
Response:

Pond Hockey. McD

BY: JTStally
Jan 8th, 2014 @ 10:07AM


It's a wonderful thing!

I felt better last night than I have all season. I think the outdoor sessions really help with both conditioning and puck work.

To your point, rust actually didn't seem to have much effect last night. I thought the Whalers-Nords game was one of the better battles we've had in the league in awhile. Both teams looked pretty strong at both ends.
Response:

Actual Serious Post-by Grundstein/Tournament

BY: rgrunds
Jan 14th, 2014 @ 10:19AM


Guys. I want to organize a Vermont tournament. I need everyone\'s opinion about interest and costs. It would be sponsored by the Vermont breweries (4-5 of them) and feature the quality beers in Vermont. The theme would continue to be outrageous subject matter. All teams would compete for \"The Baddest Most Inbred Players in Vermont\". I\'m hoping to have a tournament inside the tournament with the CSEHL and the UVHL facing off on a team by team basis, along with other participants. There would be divisions similar to the Chowder Cup based on skill. Age would be less of a criteria. There would be men\'s competition, women\'s and co-ed. I\'m hoping NAHA would participate. There would be prizes and presentations. T-shirts for all and different beers after every game included in the registration fee. I\'m trying to get all games in Waterbury and Montpelier, so it\'s central for everyone.
I imagine, if we do this right and are generous with the things included in the fee, we would get teams from Quebec, New England and New York...while having a lot of fun.

Your opinions to \"Eternal Jew and Emetic Semitic Goaltender. Bob.
Response:

Complete set of goalie equipment for sale

BY: Cormen
Feb 4th, 2014 @ 4:52PM


Entire set of ice hockey goalie equipment for sale, by the piece or the entire set, all in good to very good condition:

- Vaughn VPG5500 leg pads, 32\": $200
- Heaton Helite chest & arm pads: $75
- Vaughn T550 catch glove (for left hand): $100
- Vaughn Legacy B4000 blocker (for right hand): $60
- Tackla goalie pants, Euro side 48, waist 31\" (fits larger): $50
- Pro Masque: $75
- Bauer 3000 goalie skates, size 9: $30
- DR goalie cup: $10
- Sher-Wood goalie bag: $30

Entire set for $500. That’s a $130 savings, plus bonus of free Branches right-handed goalie sticks
603-448-2442 or bbq@dartmouth.edu
Response:

The Nords Suck!

BY: JTStally
Feb 25th, 2014 @ 10:59AM


I hadn't posted in a while, so I figured I'd stir up the pot. The title of my post fully shares my opinion ... I look forward to Parky or Marshy attempting to provide some sort of coherent response :)
Response:

Blow me!

BY: stu1848
Feb 25th, 2014 @ 11:24AM


Fun Meister
Response:

Alright Stally

BY: The Dark Canuck
Feb 25th, 2014 @ 11:50AM


I'll bite. we suck. Yes, we do. But it doesn't take a college-educated, now likely working at Circle K dipshit to figure that out. Where were you at the last Nords/Whale battle? Oh, right...working.
Response:

Well-Played Marshy

BY: JTStally
Feb 26th, 2014 @ 6:56AM


That was more coherent than I had expected.

I'd honestly just figured that the Whale could beat you guys without my offensive contribution, but I was wrong. I've circled March 18 as a game I must make. Perhaps I'll even register an assist!
Response:

Play-In Game

BY: Z-Skate
Mar 18th, 2014 @ 6:44AM


I probably can ref the play-in game between the Nords. and DR.. Yes, I am saying we will beat up on the Nords. tonight..
Response:

I think we'll take that as motivation

BY: The Dark Canuck
Mar 18th, 2014 @ 12:54PM


Good to see your competitive side vocal on gameday Z. All of us that ARE skating tonight, are pumped for this one too. But beating up on us? Historically our games have been close. I hope you guys are all there, and rested. That way there's no excuses. Unless the calls don't go your way, then I'm sure everyone will hear about it.

Old Time Hockey - Live By It
~Marshy~
Response:

Commissioner Shawn is Best Chiropractor Possible

BY: rgrunds
May 16th, 2014 @ 10:11AM



Wow. Shawn\'s really good. My back felt better immediately. I just wonder why we both had to be naked at the exam. Seemed a little odd. And I didn\'t understand it when Dr. McDermott said he \"could take my blood pressure orally\". What did that mean? There was an apparatus with a cuff and a bulb, I\'d seen in other places. Well, you\'re the doctor. You know what you\'re doing....yeah...
Response:

wellll.....

BY: The Dark Canuck
May 16th, 2014 @ 10:24AM


Did he take you down to the dungeon? Run a pain train on your ass? Because these are the feedback comments I'VE heard! Dr. FINGERBANG!!!
Response:

A Little Odd

BY: rgrunds
May 16th, 2014 @ 10:41AM


The Sheepskin mask was a little odd.

Response:

BAHAHAHAHA!

BY: hkydoc
Jun 1st, 2014 @ 8:42AM


This is fucking HILARIOUS! I love a good roast!

Dr. McD
Response:

300 miles in 3 days

BY: Z-Skate
Jun 26th, 2014 @ 7:19AM


Gentleman - I am looking for your support in raising money for cancer research.. I am looking to try and raise $2,500 dollars. If I do I will ride 300 miles in 3 days. Below is a link.

http://www.kintera.org/faf/search/searchParticipants.asp?ievent=1085134&lis=1

If this doesn\'t work go to \"the prouty\" website select donate and plug in my name.

Cheers.
Response:

Prize on the line.... for the bar rats!!

BY: Z-Skate
Oct 21st, 2014 @ 10:41AM


Rumor has it that the 1st goal score on JT is being purchased by an unknown supporter of the UVie... Any takers on the Nords, to turn around and snipe one on the netminder to get a free adult beverage?
Response:

SHIT!

BY: kpark
Oct 21st, 2014 @ 11:49AM


Hmmm, that makes it really interesting. I could get a free beer AND piss off Turner?!?!? Very tempting.

My only goal is to make Jordy McGee absolutely miserable tonight. We are going to play the trap whenever he's on the ice. We also brought on a couple of goons to keep him honest!

KP
Response:

Goons...

BY: Z-Skate
Oct 21st, 2014 @ 11:55AM


GP is playing for the Nords. tonight, no way!

And who says "time doesn't mend a broken heart.." keep up the therapy sessions KP.



Response:

HA!

BY: kpark
Oct 21st, 2014 @ 1:35PM


We have goons coming that have never been seen before. Goons that we only bring out of the cellar on special occasions!

Just kidding. This should be a great game. I'm definitely looking forward to playing against Jordy. Just hope he doesn't burn me too many times.

KP
Response:

UVHL Calendar

BY: Z-Skate
Oct 21st, 2014 @ 1:58PM


Anyone else having trouble downloading the schedule into a gmail account?
Response:

Looking into it

BY: kpark
Oct 22nd, 2014 @ 1:52PM


Hey Z, I tried trouble shooting it really quickly but haven't figured out what the issue is. If anyone else is having problems, please let me know.

KP
Response:

Whalers By 2?!?

BY: kpark
Nov 11th, 2014 @ 6:21PM


Meyer, you are off your rocker! NORDS by 3! Solon scores 5!!!!!
Response:

After game stop...

BY: Mer
Nov 16th, 2014 @ 11:43AM


To all of the amazing hockey players... Thank you for being loyal patrons to bentleys after your games. For the past year, tue night was my favorite night to work. I will miss serving you at bentleys. My time there has come to an end! I\'ll be up some tue evening to finally watch the amazing hockey performances that I hear all about! Best, Mer
Response:

Ian Holt Memorial Alumni Game December 26!!

BY: SK8VT
Dec 23rd, 2014 @ 6:59AM


Woodstock Alumni,
Union Arena will be hosting the annual Ian Holt Memorial Alumni Hockey games on December 26. Women start at 5:00pm followed by the Men at 6:30. PLEASE pre-register ASAP at Unionarena.org as we are trying to get jerseys/game rosters organized. It is free to sign up online/Donations are greatly appreciated and can be made online or at the door the day of the event. After event at Bentleys!!
• There will be a full group photo for all hockey alum present, playing or not, between the games. Women, please remain on the ice after your game and guys be ready to go, in gear, by 6:10. There will also be a between games ceremony you won\'t want to miss.

• Bentley\'s has made bracelets available to indicate you qualify for discounted drinks after the game. Your bracelet will be given to you when you check in at the registration table, pre game. Families and friends are welcome to join.

• If you need your skates sharpened (for free) or need to borrow a pair of skates, please see Bruce in the Union Arena skate sharpening corner. You\'ll need to be registered; please drop your skates off by 3pm on the 26th.

• Donations to help defray the cost of skating to your younger counter parts greatly appreciated and accepted at the door.

See you the 26, Happy Holidays!!

Response:

Good game, eh.

BY: hkydoc
Feb 10th, 2015 @ 9:51PM


My hat is off to the Gamblers on a good fuckin' hockey game tonight. It was a competitive and fast contest, and there was no bullshit, chirping or garbage. Well done, eh. That's how it should be every night in the UVHL!

Also, LeLallier was excellent in net tonight for the Nords. Great game, Kenny! Sorry we let the Gamblers score at least 5 back door goals cuz you were making the first save all night and stopped 5 or 6 breakaways, too. Good effort by my teammatestonight as well as we kept it close for half the game with only 3D, and even had the lead for a while. Perry Bove did a good job as our only ref tonight and called/non-called it evenly all night and was mostly invisible out there, which is what a good ref does.

See you on the ice!

McD
Response:

Great write-up!

BY: hkydoc
Feb 11th, 2015 @ 1:53PM


Loved it! Nice job, eh!
Response:

Marshy/I need some cryovac filets/whole

BY: rgrunds
Mar 20th, 2015 @ 8:19AM


What prices can you get for two of them?

fondling yours,

BG
802-888-3334
Response:

GO NORDS!

BY: kpark
Mar 24th, 2015 @ 12:56PM


Great pre-game Will. I think that the long road trip for Ramuntos will wear on them and they won't be focused.
Response:

"B" Tournament in Jay/Last weekend in June

BY: rgrunds
Jun 7th, 2015 @ 8:42AM


Smegmites, I'm getting a team together. Some very good skaters from Hog Island. We need a couple more guys. Anyone interested? Fee includes breakfasts, cookout, beer. Should be a good one.

fondling yours.

BG
802-888-3334
Response:

Skates for sale!

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 22nd, 2015 @ 7:06PM


Hey fellas, I have a pair of brand-new Bauer Nexus 8000 skates, which retail for up to $749, up for grabs. I\'m willing to let them go at a really good deal. They are size 9D. Email me at
gmarshy77@gmail.com and I can send pics. These are top of the line skates, they simply don\'t fit, and I can\'t return them. Thanks.
~Marshy~
Response:

Here they are

BY: The Dark Canuck
Sep 22nd, 2015 @ 7:12PM


https://images.totalhockey.com/img.aspx?itm_id=14713&div_id=41&pic_type=5&mtx_id=0
Response:

Looking for Player of the Week Sponsor

BY: kpark
Aug 11th, 2016 @ 4:55PM


Hey guys, we are looking for a company to sponsor our Player Of the Week (POW) contest. In the past Long Trail has given the weekly winner a case of beer. The prize could be anything, free pizza, appetizer, beer, discount, etc.

We are also looking for a sponsor for our Pick 'Em contest where our players pick the winners of each game and at the end of the season whoever has the best winning percentage is the champion.

Please let us know if you know of any companies that would be interested.
Response:

Lunchtime pickup at Hartford Rink (WABA)

BY: kpark
Oct 5th, 2016 @ 7:36PM


Ladies & Gentlemen, our friends at Wendell A Barwood Arena (Hartford) will be running a lunchtime pickup starting Friday, October 14th. The skate will be from noon - 1pm and the cost will be $10 per skate (Goalies are free).

It's a good excuse to get out on the ice another time each week.


Response:

Pickup, Sunday 6pm @ Woodstock

BY: kpark
Oct 10th, 2018 @ 7:28PM


Hey guys, I need a couple skaters and a goalie this Sunday, October 14th at 6pm @ Union Arena in Woodstock. $15. Is anyone interested?

If so, email me at kpark@parkcreative.com.

Thanks,
Kelly
Response:

UVHL Pickup Tuesday Nights

BY: kpark
Sep 14th, 2021 @ 11:58AM


UVHL will not be playing this year due to COVID.

We will run a pickup on Tuesday nights @ 8:15pm - 9:30pm.

$15. Please reach out to info@uvhl.com if you're interested.

KP
Response:

Pre-Season Pickups @ Campion

BY: kpark
Sep 14th, 2021 @ 1:20PM


Hey guys, I grabbed some pre-season ice at Campion Rink in Lebanon, NH. $15 per skate. Let me know if you're interested. info@uvhl.com.


Sat. 9/25 12-1
Sun. 9/26 2-3
Fri. 10/1 8:40-9:40
Sun. 10/3 4:20-5:20
Wed. 10/6 8:40-9:40
Fri. 10/8 8:40-9:40
Sun. 10/10 4:10-5:10
Wed. 10/13 8:40-9:40
Response:

Upper Valley Sub List

BY: kpark
Sep 22nd, 2022 @ 11:18AM


Hey guys, I'm thinking about building out a site/page for team / league / skate managers to find players and goalies last minute.

This would also serve players & goalies to help find skates looking for players.

Would anyone be interested in this?
KP
Response:

Lunchtime Pickup @ Hartford

BY: kpark
Oct 18th, 2022 @ 1:07PM


Hey guys, just a heads up that there is a noontime pickup at WABA(Hartford High) on Friday afternoons. It's only $5 per skate or you can pay $100 for the entire season.

We typically have 2 goalies.

Kelly
Response:

Guest Writers Wanted

BY: kpark
Oct 15th, 2024 @ 10:00AM


Hey guys, unfortunately we will not have the services of the master wordsmith, Shawn "Hockey Doc" McDermott this year. His writeups were hysterical and made the league a better league.

If anyone is ever interested in helping out to write game recaps or pre-game reports, please reach out. info@uvhl.com.

You can also supply game notes and details to be included.

Thanks,
Kelly